//------------------------------//
// Chapter 3: ...You Can Make It Anywhere 
// Story: Perchance to Dream 
// by Ether Echoes 
//------------------------------//


Chapter 3: ...You Can Make It Anywhere


Shady Blossom watched Applejack stumble back, gasping for air and trying to cry out to no avail. She studied her niece with clinical detachment. Applejack’s legs buckled as she tried to stand, and only her great strength allowed her to get up.

It felt a little strange for Shady to watch her tremble and shake. Applejack was such a powerful mare, but right now a kitten could have shoved her over. Snapping a pair of knives out from the chest and strapping them to her hooves, she advanced. Her hooves crushed the decaying flowers, sending up a pungent odor of dust and rot. The light from the house cast her shadow across Applejack as she raised a hoof to strike.

Applejack forced in air, enough to wheeze weakly. “Why?” Her eyes were wide and her legs trembled such that she almost fell again; she might have tried to run or fight, but it seem to be all she could do to hold her ground. “Sha... dy?”

That strained voice may as well have been a solid wall. The blade, deadly sharp, gleamed in the light before her neck, but no matter how Shady twisted or angled the knife, she couldn't bring it to bear upon Applejack—her niece, her family.

Primal instincts screamed to silence Applejack. The blade wavered as it drew closer to her. It would be trivial. Slit her throat. Tear the room apart. Claim somepony else had done it. Shady could cut herself a few times with the same knife before she disposed of it, too. Make it seem like she put up a fight against Applejack's unknown assailant. No pony would ever suspect Shady.

Flickering images assailed her, of a smiling Hop Seed and a date at Coneigh Island, threatening to overwhelm her. The warm, balming sensation of their embrace bubbled forth like spring water.

Snarling, she shifted the blade away and struck her across the face with a hoof, sending her spinning to the ground. Excruciating pain shot up her foreleg, as if Shady had struck a brick wall instead of Applejack, but she pushed it out of mind and glanced around. Her eyes darted between the still-living mare and the chest.

Rasping for breath, Applejack whispered a few words towards the house as she mouthed a call for help. Making up her mind, Shady reached into the chest, grabbing a small vial and forcing Applejack’s head up. She tapped out three drops, right into the back of the throat. Applejack tried to gag, but Shady simply closed her mouth and stroked her throat until her struggles stopped, her entire body going limp and unresponsive while her eyes rolled back.

Out came the wing blades, the papers, the vials, and two jars of jelly. Rope was next, and she put to use tying a quick harness for Applejack. The armor, revealed after she removed the remaining fire jelly, came after that, and she belted it on. After she picked her helmet up, she stared at the banner for a long moment, considering whether to take it as well.

Somewhere inside, voices were rising. Petite Noir’s light tones drifted out into the garden. “...Thing is, Velvet Curtain said she’d run out of their meeting almost immediately, after only a few drinks.”

“That’s ridiculous, though,” Barry said. “She talked about that meeting all the way home. She was out for at least an hour.”

“That’s exactly what I’d like to know, Mr. Seed.”

Shady’s hooves abruptly came alive with pain, and she dropped her helmet as if it had burned her. It bounced and clanged before she could catch it again.

“Wait, did you hear something? Shady?” Barry called.

“Mom?” Babs shouted. “You okay out there?”

Hooves pounded in the living room.

Shady slammed the helmet on her head before grabbing the banner and quickly wrapping it around Applejack so that it made a wide bundle. She then grabbed the harness and clawed at the air with her wings. For a mare that didn’t look particularly big, Applejack was heavy, and the moment it took to bring her out of the window was enough for Babs to shout “She’s taking Mom!” as the ponies rushed into the greenhouse.

Petite Noir’s horn flared, and a hot bolt of light cut through the air and glanced off the armor around her flank, managing to singe her. Shady Blossom ignored it and flew on, struggling against Applejack’s weight. She was intensely conscious of the fact that two much bigger pegasi were in the house and would be roused on a moment’s notice, and with such a burden it wouldn’t be hard for them to spot her. The idea of dropping Applejack hurt almost as much as striking her did, however, and she settled for diving behind the line of brownstones.

Somewhere above, it was certain that Jaybird and Surfline would be staring down and trying to spot the fleeing thestral, but black armor and a black-wrapped burden were nearly impossible to see without the benefit of direct lighting. Shady flew towards the river, fighting to stay aloft even as her mind raced.


* * *


The underhang of the West River Bridge was dark, but for a few steady lights here and there, casting the shadows of catwalks and ladders across Shady Blossom and Applejack. The whole thing was ugly, clearly not intended for pedestrians or casual fliers, and it rattled with the passage of railcars overhead.

Applejack lay heaving, mere feet away from a hundred-foot drop to the dark water below. Her throat was bruised, if functional, and she stared around wildly until her eyes fixed on Shady Blossom. Struggling, she tried to rise, but found her legs thoroughly bound.

Shady sat with the Banner of Night wrapped about herself. Her helmet was off, and she stared blankly into the distance, perceiving but not really seeing the lights of the city reflected on the broad river. Her hoof tightened the banner around her, displaying the crescent moon against the light.

“Shady?” Applejack coughed. Though her passageway had cleared in the trip, it was clear from the scratchy sounds she was making that it hurt to breathe even without the added stress of speech. “Wha... what’s goin’ on?”

There was no answer. Shady huddled deeper into the banner.

“Shady!” Her shout was little more than a hoarse whisper. “Darn…” She wheezed and had to catch her breath. “Answer… me! What’s goin’ on?”

“You know what this is!” Shady snapped. Her eyes came to rest on Applejack and hardened. She wavered, and her eyes watered. Applejack had become painful to gaze upon. Shady rose with a snort, trotting back and forth across the walkway. “It was me, Applejack,” she whispered, barely loud enough to carry. “It was me all along.”

“Why? How?” Applejack demanded. “Your own family. Your husband and kids!”

Shady winced. She could remember potions held in her mouth, pouring alchemical fire onto a cloud house below her. She had watched as the fires caught and lit up the cloud substance, blazing as if it were fresh tinder, and smiled.

Almost right on top of it, the memory of Babs Seed crying in her forelegs, wailing her heart out, pushed the first memory aside. The whispered word “Mom” had swelled her heart. They had spent the whole day after in Coneigh Island together, as mother and daughter.

A hard, cold gust of stinging salt air brought her back to her senses. Shivering, she reached for the banner and found it had dropped to the floor. She snatched it before it could drift away and considered it for a moment, taking in the emblem.

“I’m not a terrible gardener nor a failed actress,” she said, through clenched teeth. “I am wh-what I have always been. Faithful.” Her eyes were drawn to the scars on her hooves. The bubbled tissue of the hoof and the white lines on the ankles pulsed with her heartbeat, each surge bringing a fresh sense of heat.

“That ain’... ain’ true. You were... a victim!” Applejack coughed heavily. “They killed your family... you said it yourself!”

“Yes, they... they set fire... No... no, that's…” The banner slipped between her trembling hooves and fell to the floor, Shady along with it, collapsing atop the flag. She put a hoof to her temple, breathing hard. Flashes of a burning house raced through her mind. A perfect, picturesque home burned to ashes. It all seemed so real. Too real. Shady looked again, through her own eyes and not through the eyes of her memory, and things shifted out of focus. The house still burned, but the building, the clouds, the sky, even the fires seemed stretched and distorted, as though the entire memory were some kind of twisted projection on a film—a facsimile of a tragedy that had never happened. "It's... not... real."

Another wave of coughing rolled through Applejack, but she pushed through it. Her voice sounded much clearer—an incidental side effect of the sleeping draught. “Wh-what? What’s not real? For heaven’s sake, Shady, talk to me!”

“My family was never real!” Shady shouted with such temper, such ferocity, that it surprised even her. The echoes of her proclamation stole her breath, and she continued in a hushed whisper, shocked at her own revelation. “I've... I've never had a family.” Her lip trembled. “H-how could I not know that?” She shut her eyes tightly, her jaw tensing for a moment before her voice rose, stern and raw. “I... I never had a family.”

“You must have had a family. I don’t understand, Shady, what’re you sayin’?”

Memories swamped her again. She was fighting, struggling against another thestral, a stern older stallion with a scarred face. He wasn’t shy about using his hoofblades, and blood poured down her face into her eyes. She reared up, striking. Fierce pride burned in her as she struck true, sending bright red spraying across the floor.

The stern stallion was there again, only she was much shorter. He slapped her tiny hoof as she reached for a hug. Dimly, she recalled him saying something, but all she could remember clearly is that she cried herself to sleep.

In the next instant, she was gasping, her legs held up in a hospital bed. Another contraction wracked her and she cried out loudly, pushing and struggling to give birth to Dandelion, a foal who would fill her world with light and love.

“I...” Shady Blossom said, sweat breaking out. “Applejack...”

“Shady, please, listen to me. We can get through this, we can—”

“Shut up!” she shouted and snapped her wings open with their glittering blades bared. “I had someone! I had... I had... a father? No... never father. Never father. Never, ever call him father. Master. I had a teacher, a Master. An orphan, never knew my folks...”

Applejack twisted in her ropes until she managed to push herself up on her rump, so that she was sitting. “Okay... okay, let’s talk about your Master, then.”

“No, no we won’t. You are going to... going to...” Shady bit her lip. It was like being caught without her lines memorized, the script she was meant to follow misplaced somewhere. Perhaps she could just buck her into the river. It wouldn’t take long, just a long drop and a lungful of water.

There was a painful stinging as her head screamed at her, and she yelped. Pressing a hoof to her face against the sudden headache, she gasped for a moment before turning back to Applejack. “Y-you’re going to stay right there while I think of my next move!”

“Next move? Flyin’ fiddles, Shady, what do you think you’re doin’?”

“What I should have done, what I always do, when you weak, stupid...” Shady paused. “Wh-when you and the others aren’t paying attention, when you’re asleep! I make a statement, I keep the cause alive!”

“What cause, Shady?” Applejack’s eyes tracked over to the jars of orange jelly. “Firebombin’? What kind of cause is that?”

“The cause I was made for!” Shady grabbed the banner and shoved it into Applejack’s face. “You know what this is, you know what I am. A member of the Order of Eternal Night!”

Before Applejack could respond, she wheeled about, staring out at the night sky, with a full moon hanging over the city. “No, I am the Order of Eternal Night. I’m all that’s left. I was going to send a message to that traitor Star Gazer, but she skipped town. Guess that makes her a coward, too.”

“Star Gazer? Tarnation, Shady—”

“I gave her everything! She betrayed Luna, she betrayed me!” She banged her hooves, steel ringing against steel. “I took her from nothing and made her into a... a... I... oh, Luna...” Just like that, her mood was shifting again, drawing her back down. She stared blankly at the jars of jelly.

She could remember smashing through the window, hoping to pin Star Gazer to the bed. The earlier promise for them to meet had sparked something in her. There had been just the dimmest spark of hope, the thought that she could have reached out to her, before she noticed the place abandoned, and then had come the smashing of furniture. One incendiary planted in the center of the room and then it was off, racing back.

“I’m the traitor. Oh, Luna, I’m the traitor. Applejack... please, I... I don’t know what’s going on, I... I know I wrote those messages, I... was so angry at myself. I couldn’t do anything, I felt trapped...”

“Trapped? Trapped how?” Applejack asked, intent.

“I just want to lash out and hurt things, but... it’s like I can’t! Everytime I so much as think of really, seriously hurting somepony I just hurt myself. Sometimes I’ll set fire to an abandoned building just to scream in frustration! Why can’t I do it?”

Shady felt her gorge rise. “Wait, wh-why would I want to hurt ponies? That’s... that’s vile...” She gagged. The urge to vomit was strong as the desire to harm, even kill, and her disgust met one another.

Try as she might, she couldn’t hold back the tide of images. They jumbled, without respect to chronology or even rational connection. Memories of throwing a bomb into a watch store owned by an aging thestral mixed with memories of long hours as a filly, mixing potions. A recollection of the time Barry had proposed to her bled into her talking quietly with Star Gazer, the two holding each other to share warmth on a cold mountain as they waited out a Royal Guard patrol.

“That ain’ who you are, Shady! Listen to me!” Applejack said, her rasping voice low and fierce. “You’re my aunt. You’re a mother of four. You love those kids, and you’d never hurt a single one of them.”

“No, I... I mean yes...” Bubbling up from within, new images flickered into her consciousness. The feeling of warm mouths nuzzling at her, seeking out her milk. The happy faces of the Crusaders, egging for seconds, as she made them breakfast each morning.

“It’s all so wrong. What happened to me, Applejack?” she asked. “I... I thought I was just somepony who got lucky. The acting... the acting was...”

“Yeah?”

“It... it was all a lie. Everything was a lie. I felt it, I knew I was just going through the motions, before I came here. Acting... I acknowledged that I was lying. It was all a big charade, it made it...”

“Barry ain’ a lie. Dandelion, Hop, Babs. and Lin aren’t lies.” Applejack emphasized each name with a clap of a bound hoof against the steel.

“No! They’re just... they’re part of the cage!” Shady said. She spun once more on Applejack, her eyes burning, but the fire was weak. “They’re holding me back, making me turn against myself.”

“And why not? What’s it all worth, Shady? You told me yourself, it’s a stupid cause. All you’ll do is kill everypony who ever lived, even if Luna did help you and if you did succeed where she failed!”

“It’s not true, the Elements can do it! They can make the world warm enough to survive Eternal Night, as they should have done before you and your friends got your filthy hooves on them and... and... corrupted them somehow!”

Applejack matched her gaze, and Shady felt herself wavering again. The pain in her ankles flared up, and her head started to ache. “Do ya really think that?” she asked. “You’ve known me, now, Shady. You know what I am and what I ain’t. Think about it: if I’m the real deal, what does that make of your fancy Order legends or whatever the hay those are?”

With a roar, Shady threw herself at Applejack, but the pain in her head forced her down again, making her stumble and trip. “No, no...” she groaned where she lay.

“Yes! I’ve met Luna. She never wanted any such thing, it was all this monster possessing her, Nightmare Moon!” Applejack crawled forward, trying to reach Shady. “I met her, too, and she was about as stable as a twig house in a hurricane!”

“You liar!” Shady said, surging up again and knocking Applejack back. “Nightmare Moon, no, Queen Luna was a hero! She tried to reason with the Tyrant, and only when everything else failed did she strike out, only to be betrayed!”

Applejack gawped at her. “What the hay kinda nonsense is that?”

“Don’t you—!” Shady winced, the pounding in her head returning. “I... I remember when I met her...”

“Shady? You met the Princess? What happened?”

“I... I think I know why... everything is so....” Shady’s eyes grew blank. An enormous, overpowering surge was sweeping over her. She could remember the last time she had met the Princess of the Night, as certainly as if it had happened yesterday.


* * *


Shady Blossom tapped her armored hooves against the stones of the old castle, her eyes scanning the horizon. Her helmet sat on the stone beside her and the wind caught her short mane. Above her, the moon was bare, devoid of the presence that had been imprisoned in it for so many centuries.

“Do you see Her?” Black Cloud asked, the teenager practically bouncing in his ill-fitting armor. He was young, cute, and too enthusiastic to live, a bad combination in a career warrior. “Is She here?”

“Shut up,” Bell Tone said, swatting him with the butt of her spear. Tall and taciturn, she returned to sitting patiently. In others, it might have been seen as an active refusal to fret, but Bell Tone let nothing unsettle her that she did not wish to. “The Queen comes on Her own time.”

“I still can’t believe what happened,” Star Gazer said, morose. She perched on top of a crumbling parapet, looking down into the remnants of the Castle of the Royal Pony Sisters. “I thought this would be over already.” One step away from covering her face in her hooves, it was little surprise that Gazer would be the first to voice such concerns. Shady felt a little like smacking her, but she didn’t have the heart. Anypony could have doubts at a time like this.

It was the job of a leader to rally her troops, not to demoralize them further.

“If it were,” Shady said, with quiet conviction, “She wouldn’t need us. Our Queen has called, and we will respond at last.”

“But... but She was beaten,” Star Gazer said, squirming uncomfortably. No pony raised a hoof to her, as they might have in other times. They all felt what she was voicing, after all, even if none of them were saying it. “Weren’t the Elements of Harmony supposed to aid us? They just... took Her power away like it was nothing, and then the Tyrant came back and they embraced each other, like it never happened!”

Arc Light lifted his face to speak, but then lowered it, rubbing at his missing eye. For a moment, Shady Blossom worried that he might strike at Star Gazer. It was definitely within him. Of all of them, though, he had seemed the most broken up by the events of the previous day.

It was a day that hadn’t been supposed to come, either. Nightmare Moon had declared to the world that night was everlasting, and then dawn had risen in stark defiance.

Shady couldn’t allow herself to be dragged into despondency, though. She needed to be strong for them, and for Her. Everything was for Her.

“It’s a trick. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again. She’s been wounded, but not beaten,” Shady Blossom said, rubbing the scars on her forelegs. They were throbbing particularly badly tonight. “It has to be, or...”

“...or it’s all been for nothing,” Arc Light whispered, his voice hoarse. “Everything we did. All the preparations we made. Everypony we hurt.”

Silence reigned.

Just as it seemed they might all give in to despair again, a shout went out from one of the towers. “The Queen! It’s Her!”

As if the words were a spark to oil, thestrals all around the castle leapt into action, boiling off the castle walls and soaring up to get a look. Each of them spied the glint of a distant carriage, as dark as night. Then they dove down, in through the holes of the ruins, to gather in orderly ranks in the main hall, leading up to where the Elements of Harmony had once awaited their representatives. Midnight-armored bat-winged ponies, all of them armed and ready, waited patiently. Shady Blossom stood in the front row, as near to the dais as she could, her heart pounding.

Part of her knew that this was it. This was the moment that all of her long years of devotion would pay fruit. She would look into Her Lady’s eyes and see the gratitude in them. Her life would have meaning.

Past the great windows, a black chariot passed by, sharp and foreboding as it swept through the air. The thestrals raised themselves slightly, then quickly bowed, abiding against the coming of their mistress.

After a few minutes of nothing happening, somepony coughed. The kneeling Order of Eternal Night began to shift uncomfortably, finding the obedient pose difficult to keep up for so long.

Eventually, somepony went over to the doors, peeking through. “Dread Majesty?” he called, his voice echoing in the empty hall. “We’re meeting in here.”

“Ah, of course, our apologies...?”

“B-B-Black Cloud, Dread Majesty,” the stallion stammered.

“Thank you, Black Cloud, thou art a fine young buck,” Her voice said. Black Cloud fell to his belly at once, overwhelmed by the honor of being addressed so.

Striding into the room, flanked on either side by a set of wary Night Guard, was the Queen of the Night. A slim mare with a short, powder blue mane, She projected power and confidence in spite of her reduced stature. Rather than be disappointed by the sight of the Queen, who was barely taller than Shady Blossom herself, she felt awed. Her Mistress came among them in a beautiful, pleasing guise, a sign of Her favor if anything.

Coming to a stop near Shady Blossom, she turned and looked over the gathered crowd—some two hundred ponies, all of them waiting breathlessly on Her word. It must have been Shady’s imagination, but she thought saw sadness in those eyes. That gave her pause—the thought occurred to her that the Queen might be displeased with how few their numbers were. It was true that some had fled with the dawn, but they were young and lacked conviction. The greater problem by far had always been recruitment. Shady considered drafting plans to step up their efforts, but put them aside to give Luna her full attention.

“My little ponies,” the Queen called, Her voice booming over the gathering, “I extend my gratitude to thee for coming on such short notice. I pray my summons did not trouble thee.”

“For you, My Lady, we waited a thousand years,” Star Gazer gushed. She squeaked, realizing she had spoken out of turn in her excitement, and lowered her blushing face. Her hooves spread as she braced to be blown into oblivion.

“Yes, thou hast.” Luna’s voice barely carried. She looked to Shady with sad eyes. “What is thy name?”

“St-St-St...” she squeaked at the ground, squirming.

“It is all right, my little pony. Thou mayest look upon me; I hold thee no malice. Clear thy throat, take thy time, we have all night.”

“St-St...” She swallowed, daring to look up after a moment. “Star Gazer, Your Majesty.”

“That is a lovely name, child. Tell me, what wouldst thou be doing, wert thou not bound to my service as thou art?”

“I, uhm...” Star Gazer blushed brightly, looking around. Shady Blossom prodded her, gently but firmly. The Queen had asked her a question, which could not be denied. “I-I was going to st-study to be a teacher, Dread Majesty.” Her blush deepened, particularly as the gathered warriors snickered. Shady herself stared.

“Why didst thou abandon this study?”

Star Gazer gaped for a moment. “Why, to follow you, of course! I mean, my brother—he told me how much it all meant, the truth of the stories, and when he died, I just had to take his place, I-I...” She shuffled awkwardly from hoof to hoof.

“And thee?” Luna asked. Shady started, realizing that she was being addressed. It was a little humiliating, but she intended to make up for it.

“With you, Majesty!” she answered at once, snapping to attention.

“Forgive me, the question was unclear. What is thy name?”

“Shady Blossom, My Lady.”

“I see upon thy flank oleander flowers. What is thy special talent?”

“Alchemy and poisons, My Lady. Oleander is a poisonous plant,” Shady said, her voice throbbing with pride as she lifted one of her scarred hooves. “I got it mixing in your service, along with these, when I accidentally made a more potent fire potion, one that could catch fire to even the wettest cloud stuff. I’ve been with you since foalhood.”

To be able to tell her cutie mark story to Luna Herself, and tie it into Her service, was an honor Shady Blossom intended to savor for a long time. Dreams of Luna inviting her to Her side, once She had heard of her accomplishments and seen her in action, dared to enter into Shady’s imagination.

“Foalhood?” Queen Luna asked. Even the Night Guards looked taken aback by that, the hardened warriors staring at Shady Blossom. That suited her right to the core—let them see what true devotion looked like. They had refused to join with the Order for too long for her to truly respect them.

“Yes, Majesty. I was orphaned as a girl, and one of our Order took me in, raising me from a filly with the true stories and the certain knowledge that you would soon return. I’ve been preparing my entire life for this night,” Shady Blossom said, her heart swelling as she went on. “I lead a full squad and am the youngest member of the Council, replacing my Master.”

“And what wouldst thou do, in the event of the Order of Eternal Night’s success?”

In the event of...? Shady brushed that aside, answering, “We’ll bring the glory of your night to the masses, of course. We’ll finally show those ponies that we were right all along.” The other thestrals, aside from the Night Guards, were nodding along with her, some stamping their hooves in approval. “We’ll take back everything they stole from us, and make them understand what it feels like to be judged and stared at wherever we go.”

“We’ll show them how to... how to thrive in eternal night,” Star Gazer said, raising her voice to join Shady’s. “That the night can be as beautiful as the day.”

Shady nodded. “We’ll be compassionate victors, of course. It does Your Majesty no good to rule a crushed and burning country, after all.”

Now Shady knew she was imagining things. The Queen’s eyes, looking into hers, seemed on the verge of tears. For a moment, Shady wondered if she had done something to displease Her, and lowered her ears. Hopes of joining the Queen at Her side were fast fading.

“Majesty... is something wrong?” Shady asked after a moment of silence. She could feel Her gaze as their eyes met, and something akin to a thousand years of disappointment and regret burrowed into Shady.

Despair creeped in. Shady felt low, so close to that ground that nothing could have squashed her. “I...I can change if you like,” she whispered. Anything to please Her.

“Oh, Shady Blossom, thou canst scarcely conceive how much we wish that were true.”

“Majesty?” Shady asked, confused. Against her own better judgement, she stepped forward. Her hooves were throbbing painfully, and she withered inside to see her Queen questioning her dedication.

“If I asked thee to abandon my service, to cast aside thy weapons and armor, wouldst thou?”

It sounded like banishment. Shady Blossom felt herself quaking, her eyes wide. “Majesty?” she asked again. It felt as if her entire world might crumble. “N-no, I mean, I-I would do anything you say. Please, please don’t send me away.”

Years of hardening fell away, and the first tears she’d felt in years fell down her cheeks. Though she could only imagine what having a family might be like, it seemed to her that this is what it must feel like to be disowned—chucked out into the cold and discarded as worthless.

Throwing herself at the alicorn’s feet, Shady Blossom looked up at Her imploringly, abandoning all decorum. “You’re everything to me! I’ve done... I’ve done so much in Your name, I can never go back! Please, I’ve never had a life of my own!” Around her, the other Order members were drawing away, terrified.

Above her, the Queen’s face was lined with pain. Her eyes shut, and tears started to stream from them. “Canst thou not live without doing so in my service?”

“No!” Shady proclaimed. She reasoned that it must be a test, a show of devotion. If it was meant to gauge her stoicism, that boat had sailed, but she still had a chance to save herself. “I can’t, not one moment without you! I don’t have a life without you, my Queen!”

“I... I see. The situation is more dire than I had surmised.” The tears had stained Her lovely cheeks darker than usual, and She lowered Her head. “If thou indeed retaineth no life without me, then I must needs give it to thee. I shall give thee a life of thine own, free from me.”

Midnight fire flared along Her horn. It grew to fill Shady Blossom’s vision and subsumed everything else.


* * *


“She did it,” Shady said. “Princess Luna is the one who made me forget.”

“If that’s true, she must’ve had a reason.” Applejack had not managed to get far while Shady was out. The recollection must have only lasted a moment, even if it felt like an eternity.

Shady rose, pacing back and forth again. She looked down at the banner. “The princess wanted me... to have a life of my own. Free.”

“Then take it! It’s your life now.”

“N-no... I have to continue...”

Applejack shouted, “Continue what? You ain’ part of that anymore! It ain’ got nothin’ to do with you! Come on, Shady! Pull yourself together, you’ve got a family who loves you. Where would Babs be without you right now? What about Lin?”

“Lin... she... she never...” Once again, Shady found herself pausing as her voice caught in her throat. The thought of Lin’s legs around her, squeezing her tightly in an embrace, rose up unbidden. The honest warmth of that moment cut through her denials, embedding itself deep within her.

“She needs you, don’t kid yourself. She’s a teen, and they’re always thinkin’ they can handle more than they really can.”

Shady closed her eyes, parading the faces of her family in front of her mind’s eye. Her limbs were paralyzed, leaving her unable to so much as twitch her lips, for all that she trembled like a leaf in autumn.

“How can I just abandon my... my people…?”

“You were never with them. Terrorism ain’ how you solve problems, Shady. If you mean the Order, well, they ain’ with you now, neither. We’re your people, now—me and the Apple Family.”

There was a twinge deep inside Shady. One by one, images of her family populated her mind, crowding out the dark and bloody scenes of her Order life. She plucked one and brought it to the fore: lying in the grass and watching the clouds go by while Babs laid her head on her belly. It was a simple, peaceful memory, and it was all she needed. She broke down as wracking sobs echoed from the steel rafters.

“How am I ever going to go back to them?” Shady wailed. “How can I ever face them again?”

Applejack tried to shuffle closer, though she only managed to fall onto her side. “It ain’ that bad, Shady. You can go back to them.”

“How? How? I... look at me, Applejack, what am I? Who am I? Even if I did, who would let me? The law should lock me up. Look at what I did to you, Applejack!”

“I understand, Shady. Well, no, most of it’s way beyond my ken, but I know you ain’ been right. This ain’ you, no matter that it used to be you. Untie me, we can talk about it.”

“But...” Shady looked down at her helmet and picked it up. “It is me, and whenever I get tired or sick or drunk or scared or whatever, it pops out again. I’ve spent months putting together potions, scouting out positions, tracking important figures, everything. All of my inhibitions go right out the window.”

“You didn’ kill me, didja? I saw it in your eyes. Ya couldn’ kill me when you had the chance, when ya had everythin’ to gain from puttin’ me down and pretendin’ it was just another attack.”

“Saying I couldn’t murder you isn’t the same as saying I couldn’t hurt you, Applejack! What about crushing your throat? What sick monster would do that to somepony, let alone her own niece?”

“Darn it, Shady, listen to yourself!” Applejack twisted against the ropes again in pursuit of freedom but found no purchase. “If you were a bad pony, a monster who deserved to be locked up or whatever, would you be talkin’ like that? You need to fix this problem in your head, you need help.”

Shady lifted her head. “No... you’re right. I do need help.” Standing, she walked over to the jars of jelly and picked one up in her teeth.

“What’re you doin’? Shady?”

Tossing the container, Shady smashed it against a catwalk nearby. The substance, now exposed to the air, ignited, though it did not explode as it might have if properly primed. The jelly clung to the catwalk and dripped tongues of flame down to the river. Grabbing the other, she threw it to the other side, creating another pool of fire.

“Rarity sent Her a message, didn’t she? After you, a hero of the realm, was kidnapped, She should be involved personally. It shouldn’t surprise me, really—She’s been touching my nightmares.” Returning to Applejack’s side, she reached down and snipped one of the cords binding her with a hoofblade—she didn’t help her out of the ropes; she didn’t quite trust herself to touch Applejack just then. She leapt up to a higher walk before Applejack could squirm free, and strung the banner so that it was framed by the fires.

“I’m settling this, Applejack.” Shady settled down into the shadows, pulling her helmet on. “I have to. I won’t be right in my own head until I do.”

Applejack rubbed her hooves and rose to look up at Shady Blossom. She hesitated, looking as if she had something to say, with her mouth opening and closing a few times. “She’s probably not gonna come; I doubt Luna herself would come,” she said at last.

Staring up at the moon, Shady whispered, “No. She’s already here.”

A shadow crossed the face of moon. It flashed down, quick as lightning, and a wave of stars encased in inky blackness washed across the bridge before coming to rest between the fires. Out of the haze pressed a mare of darkness, and all of the starry universe was contained in her mane.

The Princess Luna of present day dwarfed ordinary ponies like Shady Blossom and Applejack. Shady braced herself, but did nothing to strike at the Princess, not even to reach into her belt of potions. Even if Shady had been as skilled as she once was, she seriously doubted she would have had a chance against Luna.

For all the eldritch strength possessed by Princess Luna, she made no move to strike. Tired eyes were belied by a mask of determination that hid nearly all emotion as the Princess beheld the armored Shady Blossom standing above. Luna’s wings spread low, an umbral gown of midnight down, as she lifted a hoof toward Shady, only to hesitantly withdraw it. Were it not for the crackle and roar of the bonfires, there would have been no sound at all.

Applejack, standing off to the side, broke the silence. “Princess Luna, please, Shady Blossom needs help. She ain’ responsible for what she’s done.”

Luna lowered her gaze slightly. “I know.”

“You... know?” Shady asked. “Is that all?” Her face was set into a mask of its own. “You’ve come all this way just to say that you know what you did to me?”

Shady looked down at her ankles. The scars, the proof of her devotion, were beating their fiery cadence. She could remember now how it had truly happened—desperate to please her Master, she had been mixing together some of the most dangerous potions they had, and then the cauldron had started to bubble over. White foam had poured out and lit up even as she tried to back away, cracking open her flesh, and then pouring into the cracks, searing her veins. The rest of the day, she’d been unable to move, her mind filled with heady, fevered dreams of a palace on the moon, where a softly radiant figure had spoken to her.

“I thought I’d known you, when I got these. You said we’d make a beautiful world together, a night garden where no pony would ever have to fear e-ever a-again.” The mask cracked. Shady, forcing herself to go on, bit back tears as her voice threatened to break. “It was just like the stories. Do you know what that was like for a little filly? Were you ever even a foal yourself?”

Princess Luna did not answer. The light cast by the flickering flames gave her an almost unreal glow.

“Doesn’t matter, I guess. You never shed a tear for a race you didn’t really birth. I’ve since discovered that you were never the great and noble queen I’d believed in, either. Quite the opposite, really.” Shady pulled her helmet off and threw it to the floor below. It banged and clattered, denting its crescent moon. She unstrapped the chest plate and threw it down as well, then she peeled the rest off her back and let it drop. “Everything you ever meant to us was meaningless. We were chasing a dream, a nightmare.”

Shady allowed herself to slump to her belly after kicking her armored boots and the hoofblades off. “Turns out I wasn’t really the hero of my own story, either.”

Once again, no pony spoke for several long moments. The cold wind intensified, blown ahead of a bank of dark clouds staining the horizon. Applejack wheezed and coughed a little, gently touching the broken, bleeding skin on her neck, but made no move to interrupt.

Luna lowered her face and breathed a sigh. A tear slid down her cheek. More joined it shortly.

“No. Don’t you start crying,” Shady said. “Not you, of all ponies.”

“I must, Shady Blossom.” Luna looked back up at her, tears flowing freely now. “If I do not, who else will weep for my mistakes? My sister cried for my sake, but no pony yet has wept for you and yours. Who yet living besides me remembers how I, in the dim recesses of history, gave unto your kind the seed that would one day germinate into your Order?” Taking a step forward, she tilted the helmet up with a hoof. “The repercussions of my actions extended far beyond the battle with my sister. They continued to reverberate long after Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, and their friends defeated me with the Elements. I find now that the furthest ripples did not stop even after I thought I had closed the book on the Order.”

“Wasn’t there a better way?” Applejack asked. “I mean, look at what’s happened... How couldja just go and wipe a pony’s identity like that? It’s led to a whole heap of trouble.”

“Hindsight. It is vision you need most before you possess it.” Luna shook her head. “You must understand, at the time there was no way of knowing what we—my sister and I—were dealing with. It was the very night after you and your friends had removed the darkness from my soul. Perhaps, Applejack, you are right, but I was convinced at the time that Shady Blossom would not soon outlive my pronouncement disbanding the Order of Eternal Night. Even if I had kept her under constant guard to protect her mind, would it have borne fruit as it did? I accept that I trammeled too readily on her right of mind, however. I was distraught and terrified of these ponies, I must admit, when first I arrived. If I had been thinking more clearly, another, better way may have presented itself, but even today, how would I know how to deprogram someone of such deeply held beliefs?”

“I ain’t got an answer to that.” Applejack sighed.

“Neither do I. Right or wrong, it was what was done. I took precautions, I had her checked up on regularly. Not enough, clearly.” Luna spread her wings and rose up to kneel by Shady. Her mane, blowing in its own ethereal wind, veiled the banner from sight while she watched the stars peek out from over the horizon. “Regardless of whether it was the right thing to do or not, the fact remains that everything that has happened here is not your fault, Shady Blossom. It is mine.”

Shady turned her face away. “Princess... it wasn’t you who did all those things.”

“Is it? ’Twas Nightmare Moon who created the Order, your Master who shaped you from foalhood, and my failure to adequately address the problems you were left with.” Luna rested a hoof on Shady’s shoulder. “It was a patch, little more, and it frayed. Were it not for your finding love and a family, I shudder to imagine what the consequences would have been when my spell wore off—that should not happen for years, and those watching you should have warned me earlier than this that it was breaking. You managed to evade their notice.”

Shady whimpered, covering her face. “It’s hard to know what’s real, sometimes. I... I had found a pony who loved me and I cared for his children and bore his foals.” She turned her face up to look at the others. “I had fun acting. There were friends and parties and wonderful things under the sun.”

She stretched her hooves out, gazing at Luna with bright eyes. “Oh, Luna... it was so beautiful. But... it’s all just part of your dream, isn’t it? You put me to sleep and I dreamed of a different life.” She lowered her face again, closing her forelegs against her chest. “When I woke up, I went back to being just the way I really was.”

“Hogwash,” Applejack said as she pulled herself up with them. “Which feels more real, Shady? Your old life or your new one?”

Shady pulled her head up. Her eyes were dry again—if she could have picked a time to cry, it would have been then, but mood swings were not always cooperative. It took several deep in-and-out breaths before she could really even focus on the question. “I’m not even sure what you... What’s that really mean?”

“Think about it for a minute, Shady.” Applejack sat down on the edge of the catwalk, lifting a foreleg. Her voice sounded much clearer now, though she still winced as she moved. “On the one hoof you got your old life, where you’re a special secret agent terrorist whatever. It was how you were raised and all, and it’s the got the closest thing you had to a family growin’ up. Then you got your other hoof, your new life, one where you started out hatin’ it, but you found things in it that you liked, all by your lonesome.”

“But... I didn’t really choose that life, either!” Shady looked to Luna, whose silent tears offered no answers.

“Sure enough, ya didn’ choose it at first. Come on, Shady.” Applejack leaned in, almost touching noses. “Luna didn’ get you into actin’, and she didn’ set you up with my uncle—right, Princess?”

Luna nodded. “I am not in the habit of playing matchmaker. Actually, I was rather pleased when the news came. My hope had been that you had found something worth living for at last.”

“What’re you saying?” Shady asked. It felt like she should have been able to answer the question on  her own, too; the thought was just niggling at the edge of her consciousness. Putting a hoof up to stop Applejack, she then frowned and concentrated. “No... you’re trying to say... that it was my choices that led me to the Seed family. That I am the one who chose to become a mother.”

“Darn right I am.” Applejack settled back, watching.

“It’s more than that, though, isn’t it?” Shady looked between them. “It wasn’t just my choice; it’s really the first choice I ever made on my own in my entire life. My whole experience with the Order was dictated to me, first by my Master and then by my peers. I... I’d never really decided anything for myself until that point.”

“Put it all together, Shady.” Applejack waved a hoof towards her.

Shady slid to her feet, going over to look down at the banner and the guttering fires, the fuel  jelly just about burned out. “A pony who finds herself in a life she can’t control, because she’s... she’s scared and confused. Waking up in a bed with a stranger, lacking any support from the Cult... she reverts to her training and lashes out at a world that seems to have betrayed her.” She swallowed heavily, rubbing the material of the banner between her hooves. “Even… even her own body and desires betray her, because they’re living a life apart from her and... and... and changing the way she looks at the world.”

Taking the banner up in her hooves, she untied it and held the emblem up to the light. “There was... th-there wasn’t any more choice in that. And... Babs, and Lin, and everypony else... I felt loved like I never had been. I had nothing before that. No mother or father, no lover, no real friends, just me and my Master. He was so cold, all I had to cling to was Luna’s memory. I sang to her, every night, hoping she would answer and come down to me.”

Turning, she looked at Luna. “You did, eventually; you gave me that life I never even knew I needed. But... though that’s all true, how does that invalidate everything bad I’ve ever done? Maybe I was forced into it, maybe I... maybe I am a victim of my circumstances. How does that excuse hurting other ponies? I wasn’t possessed, like you.” Kneading the banner fretfully, her voice sank. “Even after I met my family, I hurt ponies. I even trashed my own house.”

“You didn’t hurt them nor anypony else after that point,” Luna corrected Shady with a voice that was quiet, yet firm. “Never once did you lay a hoof on your family, neither hide nor hair. No matter how your angry, hateful other self raged, it couldn’t strike at them, nor anypony else directly. You protected them, and did so from my failure. The only things you destroyed were property.”

“I attacked Applejack!” Shady countered, flinging the banner down between them. “I smashed her throat in and was going to kill her when she found out!” Pausing, she amended, “Well, no, I wasn’t going to. I c-couldn’t. But I wanted to!”

“Do you want to kill me now?” Applejack asked.

“No! Of course not!” Shady said, and then worked her mouth for a moment. “All right, but th-that doesn’t pr-prove a-anything.” The inconstant tears found their way to her once again, and she looked at Applejack through watery eyes. “Applejack, I’m so, so sorry. I just... I can’t help myself. Even if I am different, look at me!” Shady lifted her forehooves, staring down at them. It was almost as if they belonged to someone else—as if she had been piggybacking some other pony all her life. “I’m unstable, I’m not safe to be around, I don’t de-deserve to have a f-family any more.”

Applejack walked over and pulled Shady into a tight embrace. Shady tried to fight it, but Applejack’s grip was like a vice. After a few moments of struggling, she gave a whimper and submitted to the hug. She slumped against Applejack and wept. “What am I going to do?” Shady moaned against her. “My children... how can I face them again? Th-they can’t have a mother who might att-tack some pony at a moment’s notice.”

“Luna. Please.” Applejack looked over Shady’s shoulder to the Princess.

“I can clear this matter up, Shady Blossom. The law need not get involved. As I have said, the blame for these attacks should lay squarely on my shoulders for improperly controlling the effects of my magic.” Rising to her hooves, Princess Luna looked down at the two of them. “In spite of my errors... will you trust me to help you?” She extended a hoof to Shady. “Let me start correcting my mistakes and repaying you for what has transpired by my actions. Do you want to remain with your family, to give them the care and comfort that you have so ably provided in the past?”

Shady lowered her gaze. “I... I... I don’t want Babs to grow up without a mother again. I don’t want to abandon Lin Seed. I want Dandelion and Hop to know who their mother is.”

“And what of you? What do you desire for your own sake?”

Closing her eyes, Shady Blossom drew in a deep, painful breath. A large part of her wanted to condemn herself still, to pay the price for the things she did.

In a strange way, though, that thought helped. The old Shady Blossom would have felt only faint tremors of remorse for her actions. A crushing burden of guilt might mean that she had some chance. “I love them so much... I want to be with them again. Luna, please, I would like to be better, for my sake and theirs.”

“Such love, Shady Blossom—selfless, compassionate love, free from jealousy—is what helps separate you from your darker impulses. Take it from one who remembers being a monster, who remembers hurting ponies and laughing about it, who sought to drown the world in darkness and consume it. There is a better way.”

“I’ll be there for you,” Applejack said, firmly. “I swear it.”

Shady’s eyes welled up again, and she embraced Applejack. They shared the moment for a while, partaking in one another’s presence. Eventually, they came apart again and look to Luna.

Luna smiled. “I wouldn’t dream of doing this without your help. All right, then... Shady Blossom.”

“Yes, Princess?” she asked, lifting her face again.

“This is your life now. Once, my power was used to take your life and fashion a new one for you. How would you have me use it now, in your service?”

Shady swallowed heavily, and her eyes tracked over to the banner, and then to the armor and plans she had rescued from the house. She walked over to them and stared down, taking them in. Now that her memories had awakened, she knew them intimately, of course. They were the tools of anarchy and destruction, meant to break down one order and usher in a new one. Perhaps the individual implements, such as the armor and hoofblades, were no more harmful than the uses they were put to, but the arsenal as a whole had been assembled with intent to cause great harm.

The banner was the hardest thing to look at, of course. For so many years, she had cared for it, or another like it. Deliberately, she reached a hoof out to touch the material. It had hung over her head in the small cot she occupied in her Master’s house and been a comfort to her in the many lonely nights. As a young girl she would wrap it around herself to think of a future where she wouldn’t have to be afraid anymore. It had filled her with pride and a vengeful fury.

Looking at it now, she still felt those things.

It had brought her together with ponies she had cared about, however distantly. It had given her a purpose and sharpened her. For all the harm caused under its sign, it was still an important, even key part of her.

“Send it away. Light it up. Destroy it all,” she said. Her voice was heavy and dull, but her eyes were determined as she looked back to the others.

Wordlessly, Luna lit her horn. The armor, the remaining potions, the weapons, and the banner all drifted up in her aura. She looked at them distastefully for a moment with pursed lips before lifting her head and flinging them far into the sky. Somewhere, far above, there was a burst of light.

The brief little spark was like a falling star, leaving Shady Blossom’s life forever. She found herself smiling at the sight and closed her eyes to preserve it. It hurt, a chunk of identity had been cut out of her after all, but in the same fashion any great change did.

“All new beginnings hurt, don’t they, Princess?” she asked, looking up at the alicorn.

Luna sighed. “They do, in some manner or another.”

“I... I think I want another memory spell after I explain things to my family.”

Both Luna and Applejack started and stared at Shady Blossom with wide eyes. Applejack stepped forward and gripped her shoulder. “But, Shady, look at what we just went through t’get you here!”

“I know.” Shady waved her hooves to calm them. “That’s not what I’m asking. It... wouldn’t be right to go through that again.” Turning to Luna, she ran a hoof across her mane and took a deep breath to steady herself. “I don’t know if it’s possible or even desirable, but would you be able to sort of… dull my memories?”

“How do you mean?” Luna asked. She frowned, but she was clearly reserving judgement until she had heard Shady Blossom out.

“I don’t want to forget who I am again, or the things that I’ve done, but they’re all jumbled in my mind in a way that’s hard for me to sort them out properly. They’re sharp-edged and colliding with one another, with no real respect for placement in time or even emotion,” she explained. “If you could... ease the transition, I think that would help a lot. If I could face up to those hard memories, I think I can deal with them.”

“I see. That is a tricky sort of spell... but I shall try. I promised I would help.” Luna rubbed at her face, trying to dry it. “Is there anything else?”

Shady glanced down, bracing herself. “Yes... I want to explain things to my family. I don’t... They deserve to understand what happened here and the truth of who and what I am.”

“I’ve got one, too. Get her off the hook with the law—I don’t want anything to fall on her, she didn’ do nothin’ and she doesn’t deserve punishment for what her other self did,” Applejack said, thrusting forward. “Oh, and you better be there to help explain all this in person.”

“Of course, Applejack.” Luna moved to join the two ponies, resting a shod hoof on Shady’s shoulder. The thestral tensed—Luna’s presence could almost be felt, the already tall mare swollen in her imagination enough as it is. Her image had been fixed in her mind since she was a child, dominating her younger days. Luna seemed to sense what her touch had aroused and withdrew her hoof. “I am indeed obliged to make matters right with your family. Is this acceptable to you, Shady Blossom?”

Shady looked towards the city and soaked in the night air for a moment. Facing her family and admitting to them that she had been the one to hurt them would jeopardize everything she had worked towards with Babs and Lin. Barry himself might decide she was too dangerous to have around his kids. Certainly, Princess Luna could step in and keep her from losing Dandelion and Hop, but the cost of separating the family would be an enormous burden on everypony’s peace of mind, Shady’s in particular.

Letting out a wavering breath, she shoved those doubts aside. If her husband and family were to afford her trust, the least she could do is trust them in turn. She had no reason to believe that they wouldn’t support her, and thinking thoughts like that was uncharitable. All she had to do was look at Applejack to know that love and friendship counted for more than just words.

“And if they don’t accept, well... penance starts one hoof at a time, I guess.” Shady sighed.

Luna gave a knowing nod. “Indeed it does. I have learned, in my time with Twilight Sparkle and her friends, that the only true path to redemption is in forgiveness. The most important step in that is forgiving yourself. You must make amends and do so at your own initiative. It’s a long, difficult journey, but I believe you are up to it, especially with such fine ponies around you.”

Lowering her face, Shady sniffed. “I... I don’t know if I can forgive myself, My Lady, but... but... thank you. I will try. You... you’ll always be the lady of my heart. My Qu—I mean, my Princess. I am sorry for accusing you earlier.”

“No, I think that you are not at all sorry, and that is well and good.” Luna smiled. “I pray I can earn that favor instead of merely inheriting it from millennia past. Are you ready, Shady Blossom?”

“No, but I don’t think I really have a choice.” Shady closed her eyes, breathing in the night air.

“You do,” Applejack said, pressing against her side. “But this time, ya made the choice to do what’s right for your family, even if it costs you. Let’s go, Princess, they’re waitin’.”

There was a flash of midnight blue, and they winked out of sight.


* * *


“I, Princess Luna, am commandeering this investigation. All members of the Manehattan Police Department are to vacate the premises at once!”

The sudden appearance of one of the rulers of Equestria could do strange things to ponies. For instance, an entire brownstone full of Manehattan’s finest could be cleared in under five seconds when the order was bellowed at them. They piled out the door and leapt from the windows after only a moment’s freezing. The house had been full of them, too, all armed to the teeth with spears and blades, evidently prepared to defend the family to the death after the disappearance of Shady and Applejack.

Petite Noir, who must have been examining the crime scene, gathered her legs to leap with them, but Luna’s aura caught her and pulled her back. “Not you, Detective. I would like to speak to you personally.”

Jaybird and Surfline, hovering outside waiting for her, looked inside, swallowed, and remained where they were. They did not appear inclined to leave.

“Them, too. They’ve been protecting us; they deserve to know it wasn’t their fault they failed,” Shady whispered.

A gesture from the princess was all they needed, and they swooped in to land, Somehow, Babs was the first to arrive, dodging past fleeing police to throw herself upon her mother. The other Crusaders, all wearing pots as helmets, soon followed suit, piling atop both Applejack and Shady Blossom.

“What’s going on he—?” Barry bellowed, storming up the stairs with his heavy, shod hooves pounding. His cry died in his throat as he beheld the regal personage in his bedroom. Then, glancing down, he perceived the pile the Crusaders were making and, with a startled exclamation, swept up the entire mass into a hug. Applejack didn’t escape his grasp either, and all five of them were held aloft. When Lin Seed arrived, she slammed into the pony mass and stayed there, glued.

It was enough to start Shady Blossom crying again, and she wasn’t alone, as the tears of the other ponies mingled with hers. Of everypony, only Applejack, Princess Luna, Petite Noir, and Surfline looked dry-eyed, though the last of those was rubbing at his eyes with one wing. Rarity, joining the group late, stood aside with the princess to avoid interrupting the scene.

It took a very long time to get everypony settled down again. The living room downstairs was filled up, with Shady Blossom taking a stool from the kitchen to sit on. She fended off her husband and children all, pushing them down into the other seats, while she sat alone before them all.

“Everypony, I... I have something important to say.”

As one, they all leaned forward.

Beginning was hard. Stopping was harder. The story spilled from Shady Blossom’s lips in a torrent, the cracking of her voice as she fought back another wave of tears failing to so much as slow her down. She went over everything, from her earliest memories of being raised by a member of the Order of Eternal Night, to the true story of her cutie mark, to the training she had undergone from foalhood, to the attacks she had performed as a young mare, and rounding it off with the actions of Princess Luna and how it had led her to a string of nighttime arsons and the present attack on their home. Throughout the entire speech, her eyes were riveted on the floor, refusing to glance up and see.

When her story concluded, she wrapped her hooves about herself. She didn’t need to be loud—the room was as silent as a tomb. “I... I’ve not really had time to digest this. It’s all so... unreal, and my memories feel jagged and strange. I know... I feel sorry, so sorry, for everything that I’ve done. I’ve terrified you all, not once, but twice now, and... and my only wish is that I could take it all back so that it never happened, so that I wouldn’t have to be here telling you. You all deserve to know the truth, and... whatever you decide, I’ll abide by. I don’t know that I can really forgiven myself yet for what I’ve done, so I’ll understand if any of you don’t forgive me, either.”

The following stillness befit a tomb, as well. Shady perceived her family and friends through eyes squeezed shut as silent, judging statues. Her expression was brittle and strained, her jaw tight and her brow slightly knit, but no more tears issued forth. For all that she had threatened to during her speech, Shady's eyes remained stubbornly dry, despite her body trying to go through the motions, still trembling and heaving occasionally.

One voice broke through the stillness. “Why?”

Shady Blossom turned her head up, looking at the speaker, Lin Seed. The young mare was looking intently back at her, searching her face.

“I mean... why shouldn’t you forgive yourself?” she asked.

“Because... because it’s not like I chose this life. If anything, I chose to continue the fight. I may say it’s a darker side of myself, but the truth is that the other pony was me. I acted out whenever I had the chance.” Shady rubbed her face. “Even my acting was... was just a way to try and figure out what was wrong with me. I was living a lie and I knew it, deep down.”

“Princess Luna did not force you to marry your husband,” Rarity said, then looked to Luna closely. “Did you, Your Highness?”

“I did not.” Luna sat, watching the proceedings with an unreadable face. “I had her checked up on now and then, though obviously my inquiries did not go deep enough—the developments in her life led me to believe that she had adjusted well. But, no, I did not interfere with her life at any point following my intervention.”

Rarity nodded. “Then we can infer that you chose to marry Barry Seed, care for Babs, Lin, and your own two foals all by yourself.”

Shady looked at them hopelessly. “But... but they were on false pretenses.”

“Not to you they weren’t, and what resulted from it was certainly real. Do you love your family or don’t you?”

“Of course I do!” Shady said, rising up in her chair. “I love Barry and the kids and Applejack more than anything!”

Rarity leaned back in the easy chair she’d ensconced herself in, sizing Shady up for the killing blow. “More than Princess Luna and the Order?”

“Yes! What the Order stood for is meaningless; they saw oppression where there was none and, if anything, their actions made them to be the very thing they stood to oppose! I loved my comrades-in-arms, but the cause was lost and, worse, counterproductive, and we should have seen it from the start! Just because I adore childhood stories about Princess Luna doesn’t mean I want to give my life up for her; that ship sailed when it turned out Nightmare Moon was a monster after all. It doesn’t compare to how I feel about my family in the slightest. Why would you even—?” Shady paused. “Oh.”

Scootaloo rose up. “All right, Cutie Mark Crusaders Intervention Team, let’s go.”

The three fillies from Ponyville advanced and pushed Shady Blossom out of her chair, herding her towards the couch which held her family.

Shady squawked, but in her present state was powerless to resist, particularly when Barry reached out and simply tugged her in. He was silent, but his actions spoke volumes as he held her close.

“You ain’ leavin’ us, Mom,” Babs insisted, the very first time she spoke since Shady’s return. “I’m not gonna lose you.”

“Hear, hear,” Lin said.

“I see no reason for her to go anywhere, particularly if the Crown fronts any damages, yes?” Luna asked, directing the question to Petite Noir and the police pegasi.

Noir played with her hat in her hooves and exhaled mightily. “With Your Highness’s assurances that nothing further will happen, the MPD is obliged to accept regal judgment. I, personally, see no more reason to hold this against her than against Your Highness for Nightmare Moon. The ‘old’ Shady Blossom is effectively dead, and the pony remaining shouldn’t be prosecuted for actions she could not really control.”

“Making the responsibility mine,” the princess said. “In light of the sensitivity of the circumstances, the truth of the matter is to go no further than yourselves and the police commissioner. I will draft a press release with a version of events protecting Shady Blossom, and submit damages as soon as they can be adequately assessed.”

“Then I have no objections, Your Highness.” Replacing her hat, she looked at Shady Blossom. “My apologies, ma’am. It would appear that my department and I have failed your family.”

“Mine too,” Jaybird said, the burly mare looking embarrassed.

Surfline had practically crushed his cap between his hooves, and simply nodded along with the other two officials.

“Why are ponies suddenly asking for my forgiveness?” Shady asked the air.

“If you’re so determined to pay for your past mistakes,” Rarity said, “why not arrange to do some form of service to the community?”

Barry tightened his grip around his wife. “She can worry about that later. Right now, I think we all need to get a little rest, and my family needs to renew certain bonds.”

One by one, the room cleared. Petite Noir and the other policeponies went outside to inform the others that the case had been resolved, while Rarity hauled Sweetie Belle off to bed. Applejack stood by long enough to embrace Shady before retiring, silent thanks to the bruise making her throat sore; she took Apple Bloom and Scootaloo in tow behind her.

Princess Luna was the last, walking towards the door. “Please, call me when you are ready to have that spell cast for you, Shady Blossom.” The Princess wore a tight, timid smile across her thin-pressed lips, but with a solemn gleam in her eyes. Once it became clear that Shady would, indeed, be welcomed back by her loved ones, Princess Luna finally removed her stoic facade, showing just a fleeting moment of regal emotion.

Barry put a hoof to Shady’s mouth to still her before she could speak. “No. You’ve apologized enough.” He smoothed back her tangled mane, looking her in the eyes. “As far as I’m concerned, you’re still the most beautiful mare in the city. You’re my and you brightened my whole life. Nothing could make me let you go.”

“Darned right,” Babs insisted.

Her husband kissed her. Warmth spread throughout her. It both healed and exhausted her, stealing the panicked tension away while revealing it to have been the only thing holding her awake any longer.

“I don’t deserve you,” she said to all of them, and at last the tears came.

After they had all hugged and Lin and Babs had been sent off to bed—all over Babs’s protestations, as she had wanted to stay up with her mother—Shady sent Barry for Luna and rose to meet the princess again. Her ears perked as she recalled one last loose end. “Oh, Princess, what happened to Star Gazer?”

“Star Gazer?” Luna joined the husband and wife in the center of the room, looking to Shady. “She fled Manehattan because she was worried you had it in mind to take revenge on her for abandoning the Order. I corrected her at once, of course.”

“So, you didn’t wipe her mind?” Barry asked.

“I did not. She was not in as... deeply as Shady or some of the others were.”

Shady winced. “I was the only one of my team...?”

“You were their heart and soul.” Luna smiled at her, sadly. “I can understand the pain of being the one to inspire destructive urges in others.”

“Just one more thing I need to address.” Shady exhaled. “I’m ready now, Your Highness.”

“Very well.” Luna nodded, lowering her horn towards Shady’s forehead. Soft blue light shone from the horn, and it flickered gently, casting strange, hypnotic shapes. It was a gentler light than the first memory spell that had been used against her, and a lulling hum filled Shady’s ears.

Shady drooped into Barry’s supporting foreleg. Tension ebbed out like flood waters draining away after a storm. Her limbs became sluggish and her eyes refused to stay open. Despite the awkward posture, in defiance of the week she had been having, it was already the deepest rest she had ever had in her life.

“Sleep, now, perchance to dream,” Luna murmured, “for what dreams may come. Your life lies ahead of you, Shady Blossom, not behind you. Let yourself be ruled not by fear and mistrust, but by hope and love.”

The last thing Shady saw before drifting off was her princess’s warm, caring smile.


* * *


Standing on the platform in Grand Central Station, Shady Blossom marveled at how much had been crammed into just a few short weeks. Standing there, hugging Applejack, Rarity, and the girls, she felt exhausted. Small wonder, after the ordeal she had just been through. Given the chance, she might have fallen asleep for a week.

Sleep was a difficult thing to face, though. It meant owning up to her mistakes and past actions, and dealing with the guilt and pain that arose from that contemplation. Shady suspected that her journey had only begun. Luna’s spell had taken the edge off—the headache that had haunted her was gone, and her memories no longer threw themselves at her, even if her ankles still ached occasionally—but there was no blunting the sharpness of reality.

Not to mention, her family still needed raising, her husband needed supporting, and she had an appointment with a casting director that her stepdaughters were practically shoving her into. Evidently her darker self had managed to impress her with a commanding presence and “an almost palpable sense of menace.” There was so much left for her to do that it seemed a wonder that she could get any of it done at all.

Lingering around her neck, Applejack whispered into her ear. “You hold on tight, I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“You’d better,” Shady Blossom said, laughing as she embraced her niece tighter. “You have a business here, too. You must be insane, shuttling back and forth.”

“Yeah, well... some things really just are that important,” she said, tilting her hat to hide her face and blush.

“Come on, dear,” Rarity told Sweetie Belle, tugging at her. “We’ll miss the train. Oh, and, Shady Blossom?”

“Yes?”

“Bad dreams fade with morning light, and we wake to find those we care most about close at hoof. Should you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to write.” Rarity glanced around. “Of course, I may have to set up something myself. I can’t have Applejack staking claim to all of Manehattan.”

“I’ll box your ears, you wait and see,” Applejack grumbled. She bit down on Apple Bloom’s tail and bodily hauled into the train.

“Thank you, both of you,” Shady Blossom whispered. Tears stained her cheeks. “Goodbye, everyone.”

“It’s not truly goodbye if we’ll see one another again. Farewell,” Rarity said. She had to resort to levitating Sweetie Belle out, since her sister appeared to be trying to merge into Babs’s side.

“So long! I’ll be back in Ponyville soon!” Babs called, waving a small hoof.

“Bye! See you soon! You’d better show me those awesome moves again, Shady!” Scootaloo called.

“See ya next time, cos!” Apple Bloom said, standing on her hind legs to wave both of her forehooves.

With so much waving going on, by the time the train did pull out of the station, Shady thought her forelegs might fall off. Lifting up to drift a bit over the crowd, Shady Blossom felt the wind rush through her mane and watched the train as it started out west.

It is a good life, and I wouldn’t leave it for anything in the world.


* * * * * * *



THE END