"And so I said 'don't you mean rhombus'?" Twilight laughed over her tea in the breakfast nook of the library.
"Oh, Twilight, that joke went a little over my head," Pinkie Pie raised her hooves, "But you tried, and trying is important. So I'm gonna give a big thumbs up!"
"Thumbs up?" Twilight stared at her friend, "What's that?"
"This!" Pinkie pie raised her hoof and an odd jointed growth jutted from it, "It means good job! Unless you're doing it ironically, which is just really mean. Because you should be sincere when you're around friends. Because if you aren't then you might hurt their feelings, and that's one of the quickest ways-"
"Pinkie, what in Tartarus is that?" Twilight sputtered, "Where did it come from?"
"Do you really want to get into this again?" Pinkie chuckled, "Because last time we did this you really got worked-"
"No," Twilight slammed her forehooves on the table and ranted, "I'm tired of you dodging these questions. No more ranting until you make me just give up. You pull hats out of nowhere. I don't even know where you keep all those mustaches. You made a flying machine that shouldn't even work. Don't even get me started on your 'Pinkie Sense'. I'm tired of everything you do making no sense."
"Do you really want to know?" Pinkie questioned, "Because sometimes ponies say they want to know things, but then I get in trouble for it. Like this one time Sweetie Bell asked me where fillies come from. And I showed her with a few diagrams I had stashed in case of diagram emergencies. And then Rarity wouldn't talk to me for like three hours! It doesn't sound like much, but that's a really long time to not speak to a friend. But I guess that was ok, because a little while later she invited me over for a chat. And it was really nice getting to chat with her after all those hours. Though it was a little more serious than I wanted, it wasn't really a chat it was more of a lecture. Which is kind of funny because with those glasses on she has kind of a sexy professor thing going on. She didn't like it when I pointed it out though. I mean, I meant it as a compliment But she lectured me on the importance of the innocence of foalhood, and asked why I would even have a diagram to explain the isosceles lock, and why would I even show that to a filly. So I-"
"Pinkie!" Twilight yelled.
Pinkie drummed her fingers on the table.
"See!" Twilight screamed, "That, that is exactly what I am talking about!"
"What are you talking about?" Pinkie Pie asked as she stroked her beard thoughtfully.
"Stuff like that!" Twilight sputtered.
"Like what?" Pinkie Pie ate her beard, "Ooh, that's sweet."
"The constant reality bending stuff," Twilight fumed, "The exact reason you are able to do all this."
"Do you really want to know?" Pinkie Pie beat the thumb back down into her hoof.
"For the last time, yes!" Twilight groaned.
"I was the firstborn of the planet," Pinkie answered.
"What," Twilight stared as light began to contort around her friend. She seemed taller, and the room darker.
"My hooves touched the soil when it was new," Pinkies voice deepened and became layered, as if it was echoing in a body many times its size, "I exist outside the confines of time and place. I have walked the universe and touched the stars. I have breathed life into that which was nothing. I tilled the ground when it was fresh. I have seen that which is from beyond the fourth wall, and brought joy to it's inhabitants. I have witnessed the primal iteration and reiterations of this world, and seen it in all its forms. I trampled the smooze beneath my myriad hooves. I see all things, touch all things, and know them down to their most intricate detail."
"What!" Twilight leaned back.
"I am the firstborn of creation," Pinkies voice returned to normal, "I just really like being a pony. Because when you're a pony everypony is nice to you, and cakes taste sweeter, and you get to have adventures with friends, and princesses don't try to imprison you in stone, and you get to live in a cupcake, and no one asks questions when you just move into someone else's house, and when they do ask questions it's stuff like 'Hey Pinkie, can you handle the register for a little bit' or 'Pinkie, weren't you supposed to be watching the register'... I think I'm supposed to be at work right now actually, but I'm not really sure."
"Oh, Celestia," Twilight rubbed her temples, "I should have never asked."
"That's what you said last time, silly," Pinkie tapped her friend's forehead, "Time out!"
Twilight's eyes crossed and she froze. She drooled a little bit onto the table. Pinkie walked to Sugar Cube Corner.
"Hey Mr. Cake," Pinkie yelled as she walked in, "Could I have a few hours off, Twilight and I are doing something really fun."
"Sure, Pinkie," Mr. Cake nodded.
Pinkie Pie walked out and ran into Sweetie Bell.
"Hi," Pinkie yelled.
"Hey, Pinkie," Sweetie Bell muttered.
"What's the matter?" Pinkie asked.
"I just had a fight with Rarity again," Sweetie Bell pouted, "Why is she so crazy?"
"Hold on," Pinkie reached into a hole in a tree, "I think I have a diagram that-"
"No more diagrams!" Sweetie ran off, "No more!"
"Huh," Pinkie scratched her head, "Weird."
Pinkie walked back into the library, sat down, sipped her tea, and tapped Twilight on the head again.
"And so I said 'don't you mean rhombus'?" Twilight laughed.
"That's a little over my head Twilight," Pinkie Pie gave her a thumbs up, "But good try!"
"Pinkie," Twilight's jaw hung low, "What is that?"