Why Am I Crying?
By The Rated Ponystar
Formally Edited by: Clavier, Mr. Minimii and Apple Cinnamon
Edited by: Unnamed Pawn and First_Down
Thanks to Catnipfairy for her artwork!
***
With the meeting a waste, Scootaloo decided to find something else to do with her time. She didn’t want to go home where her dad was sleeping for his night job, nor did she feel like heading downtown to see more ponies mourning Tiara’s death. Wanting to be alone for awhile, she decided to play at the currently vacant playground at the school. Still, even doing some swinging and pretending she was flying with Rainbow Dash wasn’t enough to cheer her up.
Scootaloo couldn’t wait for the funeral to finally come. Maybe if it did then everypony, including her friends, would stop talking about Diamond Tiara and just move on with their lives already. She knew there was a chance the girls would talk about Diamond Tiara rather than getting their cutie marks today like they had originally planned, but she didn’t expect both of them to team up against her. Am I the only one who’s forgetting how much of a brat she was? It’s like everypony’s trying to make me the bad pony here!
The worst of it was from Sweetie Belle, who was trying to force her own sorrows on Scootaloo and make her feel sad about Diamond Tiara. The same Diamond Tiara who liked to embarrass me? The same Diamond Tiara who mocked for having no cutie mark? The same Diamond Tiara who flaunted her wealth in front of everypony else?
That was the one thing she hated about Diamond Tiara most. She was a rich snob who never stopped talking about how wealthy she was, which constantly reminded Scootaloo of her own unfortunate life. She would never say it out loud, not in front of her dad, but she hated being poor. Tiara had no idea how good she had it, and instead she wasted her money like a greedy pig, never taking others into consideration. She might as well have joined up with all the other rich folks in Canterlot. That way they can be snobs together.
She would never say that Diamond Tiara deserved to die. She didn’t hate her that much. But she wasn’t going to cry over this bully who made her life miserable. She was dead. Ponies died. It happened. Hay, her mother could be dead for all she knew. Or she could be living a new life, married to some new guy, with new kids. Scootaloo shook her head. Don’t think about her. You have enough to be angry about.
It was surprising to learn that Diamond Tiara had a soft spot for foals, and the fact that her mother and brother died when she was young. But that wasn’t enough to erase all the bad memories Scootaloo had. Her father had told her about his life growing up, how he was teased all the time. It made him miserable and he never liked talking about it. Diamond Tiara belonged to the same crowd of cowards who thought they were better than everypony and had a right to boss others around unapologetically.
Scootaloo put her hooves down and came to a stop in the snow. That wasn’t true. Silver Spoon had apologized yesterday and hugged her, stunning Scootaloo even as she accepted it. She had almost forgotten about that. A part of her didn’t want to buy it, but she had never seen Silver Spoon cry before or look so depressed.
She still meant what she said before. Silver and Tiara’s actions as bullies were still horrible and she, along with a few others, had every right to hate them for what they had done. Maybe it was harsh, but she needed to hear it.
Scootaloo was about to make for the slide nearby when she spotted somepony, about a filly’s size, running towards the opposite end of the school. Behind her were two bigger figures, chasing after her. Curious, Scootaloo ran after them.
Quickly making it to the other side of the schoolhouse, she pressed herself against the wall and peeked around the corner. She put a hoof over her mouth to prevent a gasp of shock from escaping. Silver Spoon, the same pony Scootaloo was thinking about earlier, was trapped and cornered by two colts from their class. It was Green Daze, an earth pony with a green coat and dark blue mane, and his twin brother, Shady Daze, who had a light blue coat and dark blue mane that didn’t quite reach the saturation of his brother’s. Both of them were ponies Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon had made fun of for being blank flanks.
What had shocked her was the state Silver Spoon was in. Her face sported a pair of bruises and a few scraps of dirt on it, and Scootaloo could swear she saw blood dripping down Silver Spoon’s nose. It didn’t take her long to connect the dots. Without Diamond Tiara to back her up, Silver Spoon was now a free target to those she had bullied. And the angry look on the brothers’ faces showed they weren’t pulling any punches.
“P-please! Leave me alone! I’m sorry I bullied you! I’m sorry for everything I did! Just stop hurting me!” cried out Silver Spoon, tears dripping down her damaged face.
“Aw, look at that bro, she wants us to stop,” mocked Green Daze before pushing her onto the snow. “How come you never stopped when you and your dead friend were mocking us for being babies because we were, what were those words, oh yeah, blank flanks?!”
Shady snorted and spat on Silver Spoon’s face. “I wish that carriage killed both of you! The world is better off with Diamond Tiara dead and rotting in the ground! They should just put her in a ditch and bury it unmarked so the worms can eat her pretty little face! Nopony would care! Well, maybe you, but then again you both are horrible ponies who deserve worse!”
“I-I-I know I was… cruel, but I didn’t—”
“Know? Know?! You know nothing!” screamed Shady Daze, smacking his hoof against the ground. He got up in Silver’s face, saliva spitting out as he continued to yell. “All you ever did to us ‘blank flanks’ was make our lives miserable! You know how many fillies and colts you sent home crying? You know how many ponies hate you? You should just crawl under a rock and die! That way you and Diamond Tiara can both be friends again in Tartarus!”
“Shut up!” screamed Silver Spoon. She tried to tackle Shady, but was thrown against the ground where she hit her head on a large rock. Tears streaming down her face, she held her head as blood slowly started to decorate the snow underneath. The twins proceeded to laugh at her misery, making her cry harder.
“Who’s the crybaby now?” shouted Green Daze.
“Yeah, you had this coming a long time ago!” shouted Shady Daze.
Suddenly, before she even knew what she was doing, Scootaloo rushed out from her hiding spot and bucked Shady Daze right in the face. The colt yelled in pain, holding his bleeding muzzle. Scootaloo could have sworn she saw a chipped tooth before his hoof came up. Green Daze was too stunned by what happened to see Scootaloo tackle him to the ground. He struggled but Scootaloo was able to get a few hits on him with her hooves before being pushed aside.
Getting up, Scootaloo rushed to a crying Silver Spoon’s side and flared her wings, daring the two colts to attack. Green Daze went to his brother, who was still holding his muzzle, before glaring at Scootaloo in disbelief and anger. “What the hay are you doing, Scootaloo?! Why are you defending her? After all she’s done to us? To you and your friends?”
“Shut up!” shouted Scootaloo, growling like a tiger. “I’m no friend of Silver Spoon, but jerk or not, what you guys are doing is wrong! Get out of here!”
“Why you little...”
Green Daze never got to finish his threat. A voice cried out from nearby, “Who's there?! What’s with all the yelling?”
Miss Cheerilee! thought Scootaloo, thanking her lucky stars. “Miss Cheerilee! Over here! Silver Spoon’s been attacked by the Daze brothers!”
“Horseapples! Run!” cried Green Daze as he and Shady ran off with their tails between their legs.
Scootaloo wanted to run after the two, but knew Silver Spoon needed her more. She looked over the injured filly and winced at the prominent, still bleeding wound on Silver Spoon’s head. For the first time in her life, Scootaloo actually cared about Silver Spoon’s well being. Those two went too far. At least she and Tiara never got physical…
Miss Cheerilee soon appeared around the corner and gasped in horror at the sight of one of her precious students on the ground, injured and crying. Like a mother hen, she gently held Silver Spoon in her forelegs and, pale-faced, turned to Scootaloo. “What happened?”
“It was Green and Shady Daze! They attacked her and I fought them off until you showed up! They ran away though...”
Cheerilee's face went quickly through a series of emotions before she said,“Scootaloo, we’re going to take Silver Spoon to the hospital now. She needs medical help. I need you to come with me and help explain the story to her mother once she arrives.”
“What’s gonna happen to Green and Shady?” asked Scootaloo.
“I can assure you that I’ll make sure both colts are punished for this. Doing this to a filly, especially after all she’s been through...” stated Cheerilee with a glint of determination in her eye. Scootaloo couldn’t help but admire her teacher’s dedication to defend her students.
“Ugh... it hurts...” moaned Silver Spoon, squirming in Cheerilee's forelegs.
Cheerilee wasted no time in putting Silver Spoon on her back. “Don't worry, Silver Spoon. We're going to get you some help. Just hang in there,” said Cheerilee before galloping towards the hospital. Scootaloo was right behind her.
***
It didn’t take long for them to arrive at the hospital and explain the situation to the nurses who quickly took the unconscious filly into their care. Cheerilee asked Scootaloo to wait while she went to Silver Spoon’s house to explain the situation. “She needs a friend, Scootaloo. Now more than ever,” her teacher told her.
Although they were not friends, she agreed to stay until Cheerilee got back. Sitting on one of the chairs, Scootaloo sipped on the soda one of the nurses gave her to drink, waiting for Cheerilee to return or some news about Silver Spoon. In the meantime, she thought back to what she had just seen. Although she was perfectly fine with giving Silver Spoon a tongue lashing for her past actions, physically attacking her crossed a line. I really hope they get in trouble for this…
“Excuse me?” Scootaloo looked up and saw Nurse Redheart standing over her. “Silver Spoon is awake and she’s requested to see you.”
“Why?” asked Scootaloo, tilting her head.
“She didn’t say. Maybe she wants to thank you for saving her from those horrible bullies?” suggested Nurse Redheart, shaking her head. “How could anypony do something so cruel? Can’t they see how much she’s suffering?”
“What do you mean?”
Nurse Redheart sighed. “She’s Diamond Tiara’s friend, right? That filly is so hurt inside it reminds me of some of our... less fortunate patients. She tries to hide it, but I can tell, even just by looking at her, that she feels like the loneliest pony in the world. If I lost my best and only friend in the world, I’d feel like that too I suppose.”
Scootaloo gulped at the thought of either of her best friends, despite their current disagreements, ending up like Diamond Tiara. If she lost either of them, sisters to her in all but blood, she would be broken. She slowly wrapped her tiny wings around herself in an effort to feel more comfortable. She’d had no friends until she met both Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. Meeting them had changed everything for the better. It made her feel like she wasn’t alone anymore.
“Are you alright?” asked Nurse Redheart, noticing Scootaloo’s behavior.
Scootaloo nodded and agreed, for some reason or another, to speak to Silver Spoon. Following the nurse down the hall, she wondered what she was going to say. Last time they spoke, she had blown up in Silver’s face and let out all the anger she held for both her and Diamond Tiara. Now, only a day later, she had come to her rescue and helped her get medical attention. This is an odd week…
“I’ll leave you two alone to talk,” said Nurse Redheart, opening the door.
The pegasus filly entered the room, spotting Silver Spoon in the hospital bed with bandages on her face to cover the bruises and cuts while her forehead was wrapped with medical tape. When she noticed Scootaloo enter, Silver Spoon glared at her before pointing to a nearby chair. “Sit,” she ordered.
“I don’t take orders from you,” snapped Scootaloo. “You wanted me here, so here I am.” Silver Spoon stared at her, her face unchanging in its emotion as Scootaloo began to tap her hoof in boredom. “Well? What is it? I have better things to do than be in the same room with you.”
“Why did you save me?” asked Silver Spoon. “You hate me. You had no reason to do it.”
Scootaloo shrugged. “‘Cause it was the right thing to do. Trust me, I don’t like you, and I wouldn’t have normally gotten involved, but they went too far by beating you up. Nopony, not even a jerk like you, should be treated that way.”
“I don’t need your pity,” growled Silver Spoon, turning away.
“It’s not pity,” stated Scootaloo, rolling her eyes. “And would it hurt for you to be a bit grateful? Last time we spoke you hugged me and apologized. Was that the only time you’ll ever act nice to me? Are we back to trying to claw each others throats out? I’m fine with that, because it just means everything can go back to normal again.”
Silence hovered between the two fillies as Scootaloo waited to see if Silver Spoon had anything else to say. Deciding she was done, the pegasus made her way for the door without saying goodbye. Waste of my time…
“Would you have saved me if I was Diamond Tiara?” asked Silver Spoon out of nowhere, stopping Scootaloo. The pegasus turned back to face her. “Would you?”
“...I guess,” said Scootaloo, earning a surprised stare from Silver Spoon. “The difference between me and Diamond Tiara is that she would never help a pony in trouble. Am I right? It’s not like either of you know what it’s like to be bullied.”
Then something happened that made Scootaloo’s mouth drop. Silver Spoon laughed. She laughed so hard it was almost disturbing. Tears were streaming down Silver Spoon’s face as she banged her hoof on the mattress. Annoyed by this, Scootaloo shouted, “What’s so funny?!”
“W-what you just s-said! That we don’t know what i-it’s like to be bullied! Gahahaha!” cried out Silver Spoon. She laughed a bit longer before it descended into a chuckle. Slowly, with a melancholy smile, she lowered her head and stared at her hooves. Closing her eyes, as though she was in some nostalgic moment, Silver Spoon said, “You think what Diamond and I did to you and your group of friends was bad? Please, you don’t know the worst of bullying. Have you ever had you head shoved down a used toilet before being forced to lick the rim so you can get your glasses back?”
Scootaloo winced and felt her stomach turn at the thought of such as thing. And I thought kissing was gross!
“What about having your toy stuffed animal, that your mother gave you as a present before the start of summer camp, stolen, and then thrown into the camp fire as they held you down? You lay there, watching it turn into ash while some of the older campers roast marshmallows like it’s no big deal. What if that was your precious scooter, huh?” asked Silver Spoon.
Scootaloo opened her mouth, but didn’t say anything.
“And have you ever been tricked into going into the woods at night, tied to a tree, and then forced to stay there for hours, scared that some animal might come and eat you up? You cry and the tears fall, because it’s all you can do, and you’re terrified you will never see home again?!” shouted Silver Spoon.
“What... what kind of ponies would do that?” muttered Scootaloo, slowly reeling back. If any of this was true, if there were bullies who did that, then they made Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon look like fairy princesses.
Silver Spoon shook her head and looked down at the covers she was laying in, slowly drawing them closer. “The kind of ponies who are cruel and judge you just because you’re rich.”
A long silence stretched between the two as Silver Spoon wiped her tears with the blanket. Scootaloo continued to stand there, unsure of what to feel or say. Finally, she asked, “How... how did you deal with that? All alone?”
A smile, a real smile, stretched across Silver Spoon’s face as she looked up at Scootaloo. “I wasn’t alone. I had a friend. She suffered with me. She protected me because I was weak. The only friend I ever had.”
The only friend? Wait, you don’t mean... Scootaloo’s mind shut down once more upon realizing there was only one pony Silver Spoon could have been talking about. Taking care of babies was one thing, but this was completely unexpected. She had always thought she knew who Diamond Tiara was, but now it was clear there was a side of her she never knew.
Silver Spoon rested her head on the pillow and sighed. “You can go now, and... thanks.”
“Y-yeah, sure,” muttered Scootaloo as she walked out of the room and closed the door behind her. Her hoof remained on the handle, hesitant, but eventually she turned and made her way down the hall.
She would have loved nothing more than to leave the hospital, but Miss Cheerilee wanted her to wait until she came back. Again, Scootaloo didn’t know why. Silver Spoon wasn’t her friend. They had nothing in common, or so she thought.
She was bullied too? Is that... is that why she is who she is? Like Babs Seed? thought Scootaloo, thinking about her fellow crusader in Manehattan. But Babs was only afraid of being bullied because she was a blank flank. Why would Silver Spoon be bullied? She’s rich, has a powerful family name, not to mention she’s a smart student. Why would anypony pick on her? She’s got the perfect life! Wait…
Scootaloo paused in her steps as a wave of realization washed over her. If Silver Spoon was bullied, then... was Diamond Tiara too?
If that was true did it really change anything? If Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon knew the horrors of bullying, and the hurt it caused, why did they continue to do it? Why not stand up to bullies with other bullied ponies? With their riches and influences they could have helped a lot of ponies. And what did they do instead? They just became one of them!
Scootaloo didn’t know if she should be angry or confused that they chose to become bullies instead of fight them, that they could do such horrible things despite knowing how that pain feels. While it was true they didn’t bully everyone, in fact they mostly targeted Scootaloo and her friends and other blank flanks, a bully was still a bully and there was no excuse. Right?
She was about to turn the corner to the waiting room when she noticed Miss Cheerilee had finally returned, followed by an elder pony in a maid’s outfit. One of Silver Spoon’s workers from her house? I thought she was gonna get her parents.
Cheerilee noticed Scootaloo and said, “There you are, Scootaloo. Is Silver Spoon awake?”
“Yeah,” answered Scootaloo, deciding not to talk about their conversation earlier.
“I’ll see that Mistress Spoon is taken care of. Thank you for helping her, both of you,” said the maid, bowing to them.
“It... it was no big deal,” muttered Scootaloo.
“If it’s alright, may I go with you? I want to talk to Silver Spoon about a few things,” said Cheerilee.
The maid nodded and the two of them made their way down the hall. Scootaloo was left on her own again. Before she could decide what to do next, she heard the sound of galloping hooves rushing towards her and turned around just in time to see her dad arrive.
“D-dad?!” shouted Scootaloo in shock. “What are you doing here?”
Panting, Crimson wiped the sweat from his brow and said, “I overheard somepony say you were going to the hospital and I got worried. Are you okay?”
“Y-yeah, somepony got hurt and me and Miss Cheerilee helped them out,” said Scootaloo.
Upon mentioning her teacher’s name, Crimson turned paled and began to stutter. “Ch-Cheerliee? Y-your teacher is here?”
Scootaloo raised an eyebrow. “Yeah, what about her?”
Crimson drew his mouth into a tight line. “Nothing.”
“Dad—”
“Let’s go home, Scootaloo,” said Crimson, quickly looking towards the exit. “You can tell your teacher that I took you home when you see her next.”
“Dad? Are you okay?” asked Scootaloo, hesitantly.
Before Crimson could answer, he froze like an icicle and his eyes went wide. Scootaloo turned around and saw, to her confusion, Miss Cheerilee across the hall with the same look on her face. Scootaloo looked at both adults, trying to make sense of what was going on. “Um, are you two...”
“Crimson....”
“Cheerilee...”
Scootaloo's ears straightened. Had she heard that right? “Wait? You two know each other?!” This was a shock to her. Her father never attended parent teacher conferences or had anything to do with school due to his busy work schedule. To her knowledge, her father and teacher had never met, but now that proved to be wrong.
Scootaloo turned to Crimson. “Dad, what’s going on?”
“Scootaloo, we’re leaving,” said Crimson in a tone that she never heard her father use before: utter fear.
“Scootaloo, you’re...” whispered Cheerilee, a look of realization slowly appearing. “Oh my gosh...”
“Now, Scootaloo!” screamed Crimson, making his way towards the exit.
“Dad, wait!” shouted Scootaloo, chasing after her father with Miss Cheerilee not far behind.
Their commotion drew a few wayward glances as Miss Cheerilee continued to follow at a distance. “Crimson! I know you don’t want to talk to me and I don’t blame you, but please listen! I’m sorry! I really am! For everything!”
“Just leave me alone,” muttered Crimson, lowering his head. Cheerilee shook her head and rushed forward, blocking Crimson’s path. “Get out of my way.”
“Not until you hear me out! Please!” said Cheerilee. She then lowered her head, much to Scootaloo’s, and even Crimson's, surprise. A few tears leaked out from her eyes as Cheerilee, whispered, “I know I hurt you. Celestia knows I’ve done horrible things to you, but I’ve changed, Crimson. I want to apologize, that’s all I’m asking. If not for our sake, then for the sake of your daughter and my student!”
“Will somepony tell me what’s going on!” shouted Scootaloo, flaring her wings out. She pointed at the two of them. “How do you know each other? What do you mean you hurt my dad? Why did you make Miss Cheerilee cry?” The two adults looked at Scootaloo and then each other. Neither said anything, much to Scootaloo’s frustration. “Somepony say something already!”
Crimson looked at his daughter one more time before sighing. “Alright, Cheerilee. I’ll listen to you, but tomorrow. I need... I need some time to think, and I’d rather not do this in front of my daughter.”
“I... I understand,” muttered Cheerilee, slowly rising her head. “Where do you want to meet?”
“Sugarcube Corner sound good? I always go there for breakfast,” suggested Crimson.
Cheerilee nodded and slowly walked away from the pair. Scootaloo, still without any clear answers, asked her father, “What was that all about?”
“Scootaloo, do you remember when I said I was bullied all the time when I was younger?”
“Yeah?”
“Your teacher, Cheerilee, she was one of them. She was one of my bullies from the past. In fact, she was the worst of them all.”