Note:
Better... You still need more detail. You are a writer! I don't mind you telling me about your "accidents", they let me have a better idea about what you are going through. If I know what is happening, I can help you. Talk about what you hear on the news, how you felt that morning, or maybe any problems you encountered. It will get you to talk more. I have to say that I would like to hear more about your friends. Did you ever think that the stallion in the corner is writing about you? Or have you thought about giving the older mare company? I like that you compare yourself to the diner and it's people.
Also, thank you for concern about me. We are doing just fine, the baby is totally healthy, and happy. He may be born around the holidays. I have got that covered, I am staying at my sisters for the time being. I am not enjoying it there, I am very uncomfortable sleeping on the couch. Lets just get you in order first, though. I do enjoy being your doctor, and trust me, I am much more then just your doctor. I can be your friend, and I can see you more often then just in the office. Keep writing... and enjoy the rest of your weekend.
Signed:
Doctor Lee
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December 4th:
More detail? Really? Honestly doc, just because I am a writer, doesn't mean I am good at this. We all have our pros and cons, and detail may not be my strong side. This is a 1 bit composition book, that only you are seeing, I really am not putting my all in it. I guess I am releasing emotion, but that is the point of this whole project isn't it? I don't understand why you want more detail on that stuff anyway. What does my breakfast and the news have to do with anything, other then put on more words! What is the point of the word limit anyway? Now I can understand if you need more detail on my friends, but my accidents are another story. With that? Uh, no, it is bad enough as it is. I will tell you that when it is essential, I honestly thought what I was putting in was already disgusting you.
I would like to thank you for the friendship offer. I know I'm different, and I know my issue is weird. You are the only one that understands, and you should because you are a doctor. See what I mean? You get paid to see what the crazy, diapered mares problem is. You went to college to fix these things. It is entirely different when a everyday pony, that you meet understands, not someone you hire. Now, don't get me wrong, I will be your friend, but that is why I felt that way. About you not really liking me. You are nice Doctor, Lee, and I do have to thank you for helping me. I trust you, but it just doesn't feel right, you know?
So my day started this morning, and I did nothing very interesting. You want more detail, so here you go. I woke up on my disheveled bed, exhausted as usual. I felt that horrible, cold, and wet sensation of a accident from the night before. So I got up, made my red, queen sized bed real quick, and went into the master bedrooms bathroom. Now, I change myself (duh) so I untapped my undergarment, and threw it in the trash. Afterwards, I screamed and yelled as I tried to get a new diaper on with my hooves. When this chaos was over, I brushed my teeth, and while I looked in the mirror, there was always this one grudge. This one grudge that always stared back at me while I cleaned my teeth, that I was too lazy to ever clean. I got annoyed by that stupid smudge, like every single day (All of this happens everyday), I finally slipped on one of my dresses, my least favorite color, and headed downstairs. Detail! Sweet, pointless, detail, folks!
When that's over, I head into the kitchen. Remember I said I have to regulate what I eat, so when I had the choice between 3 mouth watering pancakes, or toast, I had to pick the one that wasn't going to give me problems later in the day. So toast it was, with a hot cappuccino. Today on the news, they had a talk show like every Sunday morning. The topic was "Most Embarrassing Moments", and I listened closely, as I heard ponies say theirs. I just laughed as one stallion said he had a accident in the first grade, try doing that everyday bud. I drank my coffee slower then usual today, and I couldn't finish my toast. It made me wonder if I was coming down with something, and while I sit here tonight, I think I have a fever.
I look through a couple of magazines, and read some of a book I am reading. It is called "Winter's Gift", and it is something about how winter was created by the princess. I honestly think that it is just another thing to show off about how glorious Celestia is. That was most of my morning. Before I went to see you, accident wise, if you really want to know, I went #2. I really hope that you knowing that, helps you give me therapy! You definitely need to know my digestive track to help me! *Sarcasm*
As you told me yesterday, you wanted me to meet me today, although it was a Sunday. Another thing I have to thank you for, being that you guys are usually closed on Sunday's. On the walk there, honestly it was all normal. Do you want me to describe what kind of glares people gave me? It was the streets of Manehattan, you know what they are like. It was a long walk, but I made it, and you know what we did in your office. When I left, I just headed home, because I honestly didn't feel good. I skipped the diner today, and I took a nap. I woke up around 10 to read a little, changed myself, and had some type of dinner. Now it is 12 and I am writing to you, sick. I just finished taking my temperature, and I am looking down at a 101.2. Guess who isn't coming in tomorrow? Me!
Really though, I think I'm taking the day off. But doc, I just want you to know that I feel uncomfortable talking about my condition. I know you know all about it, but it is honestly gross, and in the future I don't want to get into detail on it, unless I have to. Yes, it does cause a large amount of my social problems, but not all of them. The condition isn't the only reason I see you. You shouldn't need information on that. I guess I will continue to do what you want, but I just want you to know I don't like that.
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Note:
It seems you did decide to skip. It is alright, because you came in today, you did seem groggy. Regarding Sunday, that was not exactly what I mean't on detail, but I see your point. I just want you to add detail, because even the simplest things can mean something. I want you to do more then release emotion, this project could potentially help you a lot with your problems. Now a example of this, was the grudge on your mirror. That means something, and I can analyze it as a professional, and see something in it. Same thing with the news, and your breakfast. It gets you talking more too.
I would also agree on the friendship thing. I understand where you are coming from there, I am paid to be your friend. But, understand that I mean't outside too, not just in the office. Anyway, you probably want to make your own friends now, and that is fine.
Last... The accidents. I really didn't clarify that. You are right, you can describe it when necessary, but at the time I found it to be another good way to talk. That is your private business, and that is okay. But, where you are wrong, is that your condition is mostly what is bringing you down. Did you ever think that maybe, your family life would be a lot better if you didn't have your condition? Or, did you ever think that your condition is what slowing you down socially? You know that is what is holding you back! Those diapers stopped you from making friends in school because ponies thought you were weird, ending up with you being anti-social when you were a adult. Since you were bullied when you were a kid, you didn't develop right, and that is why your parents didn't respect you as much as your siblings. Our goal is to make you have a normal life, even though you are disabled. That is how it works with every one of my patients. So describe when you need to, but don't try to avoid talking about those problems, or I won't be able to help you.
Signed:
Doc. Lee
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December 6th:
I guess you are right about my condition. It is just all emotional, and sometimes I don't like talking about it, due to the fact that it actually has been a huge problem in my life. But hey, good things happen to good ponies right? I am sure there are friends out there waiting for me, and someday even a stallion. It is all part of a grand plan. I pray, I am friendly, and I try to be a good pony, so karma should catch up to me soon. About what you said with the accidents, not going into detail on them, unless I have to, sounds good. I will also make sure I include detail, and do whatever you need without question. I don't even want to ask how in the world the grudge on my mirror plays into anything. Well, I guess it could if I think about it. Symbolizes something, I guess.
I did skip yesterday, and I am sorry. I was sick with a fever, and boy, was I feeling horrible. It stinks not having anyone around, I was hot, and miserable. I guess I got used to it, being that my mom didn't really care when I was sick, and told to toughen up. The only times I ever got out of school, was if I puked. Still, my mom would hold a grudge when I got home. I would have written, but I just couldn't get up off the couch. I still felt pretty bad today, although the fever broke last night. Well, let me tell you, you didn't miss anything. When I was not sleeping, I was moaning and restless. I didn't have many thoughts, due to a huge headache, and everything else. So, I took off, and it seems like you understood when I came into the office.
Today, I was okay. As I said, I was sick in the beginning of the day. I skipped the diner, my friends must definitely miss me. The actual news was on today, and I listened to that after getting out of bed, exhausted. I drank a coffee, hoping that it would keep me awake, and I sat a a stool in my kitchen, as the news blabbered on. I wasn't really paying attention, it was political drama that I didn't quite understand. After I went and saw you, I went shopping since I was running low on food, and you-know-whats. Nothing noticeable really.
I am heading out to the diner tomorrow, right after I talk to you. I want to actually get to know the ponies there. I know I say they are my friends, but did you notice I had trouble actually calling them friends in the beginning? Well, that stallion in the back, I do have short talk with him, and we do interact, but I don't even know his name. You asked me if he writes about people in the restaurant? I have no idea, because we both are kinda awkward, and he stops typing when I come over. It is mostly that kind of "Nice weather we are having" conversation.
That stallion is actually very built, and he always wears this black coat over his grey coat. Very mysterious he is, and when we do interact, I swear it is me who always ends it. I have to just go up, and say that we haven't even introduced ourselves. We make eye contact when we are both there.
He is the only stallion, other then Twister. We all know his name. Twister is related to the family that owns the restaurant, and he acts as a guard, or bouncer. Although it is a Italian restaurant, it was also a bar. He was huge though! The thing was he was really quiet, probably because he never had work. Another mysterious character in this restaurant. I think Twister is the owners brother. Now the owner is a different story. I swear he is part of the mafia, his name is Marks, and he is very, very Italian. Short, with a beard, and mean. But to the common customers, Marks was actually extremely nice. How couldn't he be? We were most of his business.
So just for you doc, I'm going to confront that stallion. We probably are the most observant there, and we can share information, talk, maybe get to know each other, and then the awkwardness in that place would finally shift. I am done for tonight, as I said, not much to report. I will tell you what goes on tomorrow.
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Note:
Okay, sounds good Annabelle. Good-luck. I don't have much to say either.
Signed:
Lee
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December 7th:
That was quick today, not much to say doc? Usually you are quite the chatter box. Anyway, as promised, I said I would be going to the restaurant. For the record, it is called Olive's, named after the owners deceased wife. I don't think you would appreciate the place, but I still went today after your appointment, and some interesting stuff happened. But before that, our daily report, which is also a little different today. It was actually a good day.
I woke up early today, and I decided to clean. I was well rested, refreshed, and surprisingly not wet (Probably because I'm dehydrated). My apartment is actually kind of large, because my brother bought it, and paid it off for me as a gift. I think of it more like a sorry for always being a douche. So when you walk into the front door, it's a long hallway. There is a spot for rain boots, beside a coat hanger. There are two doors on the right, and to doors on the left of the hallway. On the right is the master bedroom, and the bathroom. They both connect, while on the other side, it is a extra room I use for storage, and a large closet my washer and drier are set up in. In the back to the left is the living area, and a couple of windows with a nice view, and to the right is the kitchen. So it is a "T" shape. I focused on cleaning up the bathroom (At least I got to skip the toilet), and dusting everything.
I got dressed, and wore my favorite colored dress to cover my problem, and to make me look a little nicer for the event. You saw me, I did look nice right? Well I hope I did. Anyway, after I got done cleaning, I made sure I was already to go. Surprisingly I didn't pee yet that day, which fired back on me later. I brushed my mane for once, and put on some perfume so that baby smell ponies say I have wasn't noticeable. I headed out the door, talked to you, and afterwards I was on the way to the restaurant.
So I told you about a couple of ponies there. The older mares name was Electron, and she had a lightning bolt cutie mark. There was Marks, who was the old, Italian owner, and Twister, who was the big "Security" stallion. Last but not least, was the writer stallion in the back, who I actually confronted today. I arrived, and Spark was there, and he is probably the weirdest of the group. Spark was a retired military pony, and had a parrot. I think that he must have hit his head to hard during the war. Anyway, it was around 5, after I went home because I forgot my saddle bag. Spark, was at the bar along with Electron, Marks was serving drinks, and Twister was up against the bathroom door. The stallion I wanted to talk to was in the back, typing away. Our eyes met. Both almost the same shade. Spark looked over at me, and chuckled. The lights were dim, it was another cold winter day, and I was ready to actually try and make a friend.
I find it funny that this was so hard for me, but I still did it. I walked in, and put my bag down on one of the front, wood, booths. I straightened my dress, and let out a deep breath, as Marks looked along with Spark, who was smiling as his parrot squawked. I walked briskly over to the stallion on his typewriter, sitting beside him. Immediately he took it off the table, staring at me. It was very rare that we even said a couple words to each other, let alone sit next to each other and talk.
"I believe we never met before..." I said after a minute of sitting down. The stallion smiled, and gave a normal response.
"Oh, we have... We just never really talked" He said with a grin.
"Well, I see you almost everyday, and I kinda wanted to introduce myself. I'm Annabelle." I looked around, and noticed that everyone glanced every few seconds. "I mean, we have short talked a couple of times"
"Oh, we know who you are. You are one of the commoners here, you have been around for awhile now. Spark likes to call you DM. You can call me Roger, or Roger Lucy, but everyone here calls me Scribble" I thought it was a weird nickname, but what I also noticed is that they talked about me. They had a nickname for me too? I wasn't sure if I was supposed to be offended or not. To have Spark talking behind my back.
"Y-you do? What does DM mean? I didn't know you guys talked about me"
"We talk about each other all the time. You always leave before the good stuff happens, but this has been our groups hang out for years. Or at least, Spark, Twister, and I's. DM stands for Diaper Mare." The stallion smiled as my mouth gaped open, and at the moment I blushed.
"Diaper mare?!" I replied a little angry, he quieted me down.
"Yep. I am Scribble because I am always back here scribbling, and Twister is Twisted Twister, because he is not very sharp, and last but not least is Spark"
"How did you even know about that?" I looked at him, as he seemed a lot more comfortable. I was totally ignoring the nicknames he was telling me. I was just angry that this stranger called me Diaper Mare.
"You don't do a very good job hiding it. We all understand though, we are all the same here sister. We all have our problems. We call Spark, Captain Pinhead" Roger said as he looked over at him. "You are definitely not the weirdest of the ponies that come here" I was kind of scared about the whole thing, so I picked myself up, and with it came a squish. I noticed throughout the conversation that I somehow wet myself, a lot.
"Well... I'm just going to get dinner. We can talk tomorrow"
"Oh, did I come out to quick? You don't understand... we-" The stallion sighed, as I was already back at my table.
So that was what happened. I ate quickly and went home. It was awkward. Ponies were talking behind my back about me? We were almost tightly knitted, even though we didn't even know eachother. The way we had always been together at this boring restaurant. Apparently I left before the good stuff happened? It all sounded like bad news, and the whole time the two stallions were looking at me. After thinking about it, I am not sure what to think about it. I think it was just the stallion saying things wrong. They were all nice ponies, I could tell. So for now doc, I am going to give it a rest before I show up again.
I went home and changed myself, and here I am now. I can't believe my body betrayed me, and I had a accident. It sucks being this way, but at least they already knew about it. It sounded like Roger was making fun of himself when he called himself scribble. Anyway, I guess this is good-night. See you tomorrow.
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Note:
I honestly don't know what to say about that. The group there sounds like they are comfortable with their problems, maybe he was trying to introduce you to that, but he did it wrong. I think he shouldn't have told you at all. Good thing you are a mare that would come back. It is your call if you want to get to know Roger, I haven't been at the restaurant, so I can't tell. It is good you are getting somewhere socially though. We will talk in my office tomorrow.
Signed:
Doc. Lee