t'd simply been too much for the young Pegasus. She didn't want to be a lesbian. She couldn't think straight, or even barely fly properly with the thought that she might actually be one stuck in her mind. For nearly a week she'd tried to brush it behind her and continue on with the current summer's flight camp as if everything was normal, but with no luck at all she'd finally come to her conclusion, and the only way she'd be able to get past the discovery: she needed to leave the camp, and go back home to Cloudsdale.
Her current term in the camp wasn't over yet, but that was hardly a concern at all to Rainbow Dash at the moment. She couldn't go on with the state her mind was in; she'd just have to come back and finish her term once she'd gotten over her newfound issues. Gilda, of course, hadn't been happy to hear she was leaving, and had tried to convince her not to, to carry on until the near-coming end of lessons, but Rainbow had disappointed her, hoping the griffon wouldn't stay mad over it. She knew it was a stupid decision, to leave when this close to the end, but she had bigger problems now.
She was still young enough to come back for one more term of lessons, if she left during this one (which she had). The Speedster Flight Camp lessons were offered every summer for any young Pegasus, or other flying creature, who wanted to improve his or her flying; it was Junior Speedster for the younger ones, and simply, Speedster for the ones who'd already gone through the Junior. Rainbow and Gilda had been through all of Junior together, and the term after this one would be their last of Speedster – the camps were only offered up through the middle of one's teenage years. After that, flying was left up to the individual to pursue on his own. So, next summer, if everything was sorted out by then, Rainbow would consider returning to at least finish the term she'd now left.
But for the time being, flight camp was the least of her worries.
Rainbow Dash had finally made it back to her home, in Cloudsdale. It'd been a couple months since she'd been there, and while she was usually overjoyed to be back, this time was frightening. She knew her parents would want to know why she'd come back so early, but she certainly couldn't tell them the truth. She was still a fairly young age, especially to be having sex. It wasn't as if she'd be doing it again anytime soon, but…still. She wasn't ready for her parents to know about that yet, nor about the fact that she might be a lesbian. Until further notice, that was something she'd be keeping strictly to herself.
Nevertheless, she still had to get this over with. She hesitated another moment before giving the door a few solid knocks.
It was finally her mother who pulled the door open to see her, eyes wide. The two stared at one another for a good moment, Rainbow with a slightly pitiful gaze, and her mother with one of surprise: she obviously had not expected to see her daughter. After the awkward silence passed them, though, Rainbow's mother suddenly gave an exasperated "oh" and pulled her into the house, her surprise instantly changing to utmost worry, as that was just how Rainbow's mother was.
"Rainbow, darling! Why are you here so early?" she began frantically. "Not that your mama is unhappy to see you, but, oh honey, did something happen! Are you alright?"
The hug Rainbow Dash had been pulled into was slightly uncomfortable, but she said nothing, just allowed her crazy mother to get the overprotective worries out of her system. She tried to smile, though, even though her face was now smushed against her mother's chest. Rainbow's mother was a Pegasus like herself; both of her parents were. She'd inherited her sky blue coat from her mother's side, but hadn't inherited her mother's pale orange mane – the rainbow colors came from her father's side.
After a few more moments of hugging and frantic questioning, the mother Pegasus suddenly released her daughter with a quiet gasp, getting back down to all fours. She still appeared quite worried, as she tended to forget that her hugs often prevented any answers from being given.
She continued, "Oh dear, I'm sorry, sweetie. But please now, do tell me what happened!"
"It's alright, Mom," the younger coughed once released from the embrace, clearing her throat. Her mother's somewhat spastic personality could be quite annoying at times, but Rainbow couldn't be angry when she knew she was only worried about her; that's what moms were supposed to do, after all. Plus, with everything else she had on her mind, dealing with her mother's worrying wasn't the least bit difficult. She'd much rather only have that to deal with. "Nothing…bad happened, though. I'm fine."
It was partially true: it wasn't as if she'd been physically hurt by someone, or kicked out of the camp. Her distress was on a mental level, and in her opinion, it was nothing her parents needed to know about.
Still, her mother didn't seem anymore assured by the answer. "Nothing happened? But something had to have happened! You know as well as I do that camp isn't over for another month, Rainbow Dash."
"I…I know," she replied, averting her eyes as she racked her brain for an actual excuse. She really had no idea if her mother would buy anything she made up, but she had to say something. "…I didn't wanna stay there anymore, though…I…um, well…I missed being home."
Rainbow Dash hesitantly looked up to meet her mother's eyes again, brushing a hoof against the floor nervously. She really hoped her mother couldn't see right through the excuse, even if it was half-true. She had missed being home, but it'd been the incidents at the camp that'd brought upon the missing. A small blush began to creep over Rainbow's cheeks, and she looked away again, but no sooner had she done so was she pulled into another of her mother's breathtaking embraces.
"Oh honey! You were homesick? You don't have to say anything else! I told your father you were going to that camp too much! Don't you worry about a thing, you can stay home with us as long as you like!"
Again, the hug was quite uncomfortable, tighter than the last one, even. Rainbow was so surprised at how her mother so readily welcomed the "missing home" excuse, though, that she didn't even care. Eyes wide and face smushed against her mother, the younger pony tilted her head upward a little. She blinked, but soon attempted another smile.
She spoke as best she could through the embrace, "Thanks, Mom."
"No need to thank me at all, dear!" she replied, and loosened the hold. "Now that you're home, though, I think dinner is in order! So you go along and make yourself back at home, while I pull something together before your father gets here. Go on! There's even something waiting for you in your room! Just a little surprise we got while you were away!"
Rainbow's mother used her head to give her a light push on the rump, in the direction of the hallway leading to her bedroom. The push surprised her, almost making her stumble a little, but Rainbow caught herself and turned back to give her mother a funny look; she couldn't help but keep smiling, though, before following orders and hurrying off to her room.
It'd been almost two months since Rainbow Dash had been in her room. While she'd had it her whole life, she still never failed to feel awkward when stepping into it again after the few months she spent every summer at flight camp. She truly had no idea what kind of surprise her parents had gotten her, and was pretty excited to find out; the curiosity had even freed her mind from her newfound lesbian worries, if only for a short while.
Cautiously, once she'd reached her door, the young Pegasus pushed it open, and flipped on the lights. She peeked in first, but instantly at the sight she saw, her eyes widened, and she dashed all the way in, looking around in complete, mesmerized shock. Her parents had decorated her room with three of the most amazing Wonderbolts posters she'd ever seen in her life. Rainbow stayed silent for a moment, only gazing one by one at each of them, jaw dropped open. Her obsession with the Wonderbolts had been with her for a few years now, but she'd never thought her parents would actually contribute to it like this; it wasn't even a special occasion! She was at a complete loss for words.
It was finally the poster they'd gotten of just Spitfire alone that caught more of her attention than the others, and got her mouth closed again as the shock slowly faded, leaving only mesmerism. Rainbow couldn't remember if she'd ever mentioned to her parents before that Spitfire was indeed her favorite of the group, so she didn't know if this poster was something random they'd done or not. Not that it mattered, really. Nevertheless, the picture used was breathtaking, as all pictures of the yellow pony were, in Rainbow's opinion.
Spitfire had only become her favorite this past year. It hadn't been a change she'd thought too much about, beyond the newer realizations of just how beautiful this mare was to her. Everything about Spitfire was amazing, and thinking about her only made Rainbow want to meet her in person more than any of the others. The thought brought a shy smile to her face, but quickly after noticing how warm her cheeks felt now, she gasped, tearing her gaze away from the poster and rushing to her mirror.
"No…" she breathed quietly at the sight of her reflection.
The blush on her face was completely obvious, as was the faster pace of her heart that could only be felt. She'd known it would be there, she just needed to see it for herself; but did she really have a…crush? on Spitfire? Not only was it stupid, as all celebrity crushes were, it was also just another piece of evidence that she indeed liked girls. She'd never felt a blush and heartbeat like this over a male.
"No, no, no! I don't like girls!"
With a devastated whimper, the Pegasus dropped to the floor and covered her head with her forelegs for a moment. She knew full well the statement wouldn't change a damn thing; there was no use at all trying to lie to herself about it. She'd willingly had sex with a girl, and liked it, and now she was crushing on another. At least she knew now why Spitfire had suddenly become her favorite, though…even if she'd rather the reason be something else.
Rainbow stayed in the position for a little longer before getting to her hooves again with a sigh. She looked back at her reflection in the mirror sadly, wishing she could get rid of her newer discoveries and go back to how everything used to be, before she'd hit puberty, before she'd had any feelings about anypony, male or female. Shaking her head, she turned back around to look at the posters again, but immediately after, her thoughts were interrupted by a familiar voice.
"Do you like them?"
The younger Pegasus jumped at the words, quickly turning around to see her mother again. She blinked, eyes wide, as she'd indeed been quite startled, but before she could say anything, her mother continued.
She said, "Oh, honey! I'm sorry! I know I'm supposed to be in the kitchen, but I just had to come see if you liked them or not! …Do you?"
Rainbow Dash relaxed after the continuation, relieved to know her mother hadn't been there long enough to see or hear her reaction to Spitfire's picture. She smiled before rushing closer to give her mother a hug, which she happily accepted, again turning it into one of her signature squeezes. It was still shocking to Rainbow that her parents had gotten her the posters to begin with, and even if one of them had brought up the feelings she'd been trying to avoid, she was nevertheless entirely grateful, not to mention happier than she'd been in a few days.
"Like them? Mom, they're perfect!" she responded with a soft giggle.
Her mother gave a whimper of joy as she nuzzled Rainbow lightly. "Oh, wonderful!"
She kept the embrace for short while longer before letting go with a happy sigh, and rubbing her daughter's head with a hoof; she was obviously quite pleased with the response she'd gotten; it was almost as if she'd honestly spent a good deal of time worrying whether or not Rainbow would like the new gifts. Rainbow couldn't help but silently wonder if she really had, but said nothing. Truthfully, though, she would've liked any poster of the Wonderbolts. Another short moment passed before her mother broke out of the seemingly relieved state.
"Alright, well…I best get back to dinner. I'll call you when it's ready!"
"Kay," Rainbow answered as her mother turned to leave, and gave a sigh, turning back to her room again.
It really was perfect now, with the new posters. Even with the Spitfire one. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes at her annoying thoughts, again trying to push them away. It was a poster, and Spitfire was the lovely leader of the Wonderbolts, whom she admired. That was all there was to it. And nothing, even if it was a crush, should keep her from enjoying the generosity of her wonderful parents. With that in mind, the Pegasus put on a smile as she approached her bed and dropped onto it leisurely, waiting for her mother to finish dinner, and her father to arrive home.
It'd taken a good forty-five minutes for everything to get in order, but soon enough, Rainbow Dash was headed back to the kitchen and took a seat at the dinner table. Her father had looked quite surprised to see her, and uttered a small "hey" at his daughter's slightly more excited-sounding greeting, which only made Rainbow feel the tiniest bit uncomfortable; she couldn't say she expected anything different, though. Her father wasn't a mean pony at all, he just always seemed a little indifferent, and always had been a good deal stricter than her mother. Though while he was more on the quiet, stricter side, he was also who Rainbow had gotten her mane from, and her speed; knowing that, the young Pegasus had always held a respect for him that even she sometimes couldn't place. He sure never showed off his skills like she did.
Rainbow and her father were now seated at the table as her mother fixed their plates. They'd both rather just fix their own sometimes, but her mother always insisted that she do it for them, something they'd learned to accept over the years. Things were silent in the room for a moment, and it was finally Rainbow's mother who tried to start conversation amongst them.
"I know it's surprising to see Rainbow here so soon, honey, but she missed us and wanted to come back home for a while," she said as she finished his plate and gave it to him.
She turned back to fix Rainbow's now, as her father looked down at his own for a moment, then back up, waiting for everyone to be at the table before he ate anything.
"Alright," he replied. "She just staying for the rest of the weekend, then?"
The question brought a pause throughout the kitchen before Rainbow's mother finished the next plate, and came to set it down in front of her daughter. Rainbow lowered her head quickly, a small blush of embarrassment coating her cheeks as she knew her father wasn't going to be too ecstatic about her being home for the rest of the term.
Her mother continued hesitantly. "…Well…darling…she wanted to come back home for the summer, and I…told her she could."
There was another awkward pause before her father tilted his head over to give a confused glance to her mother, and then brought his attention to Rainbow, herself. The younger Pegasus met his gaze, though averted her eyes a quick moment, before trying again.
"You just left?" he asked her.
"Yeah…"
She knew her father wouldn't be happy to hear this, and she really didn't want to have this conversation. But she knew she had to. At least he didn't know everything regarding the situation.
"Before it was over?"
"…uh, yes sir."
He gave her a weird look. "So did you learn anything?"
"Well, yeah!" Her remark sounded a little too sassy than she'd hoped for, but she hated when her father tried to act like she didn't take anything seriously enough. Even though a lot of things, she really didn't take seriously enough. Flight camp, though, had always been one of the few things she gave her all in, and this was the first time she'd ever come home early. Was that not even crossing her dad's mind at all?
When he raised a brow at her tone, she quickly looked away again, though she kept a slightly annoyed expression without even really realizing it. Finally, her father gave a sigh as her mother made it to the table with her own plate of food.
"Alright. What exactly did you learn then?" he asked a final question.
That I'm gay… was the only thing that came to Rainbow Dash's mind, but the thought only made her give a small groan of exasperation. She didn't want to be gay! As her mother had no idea of the real reason for the groan, though, she took it as a sign that her daughter was tired of the questions. Which she was, even if other things were also on her mind. Lightly, her mother bumped her father's shoulder with a hoof.
She said, "Honey, come on. You know she's a wonderful flier, she'll be fine missing one month. Let's just eat now."
After her mother's comment, things at the table became a good bit more relaxed, much to her and her daughter's relief. Rainbow Dash had planned on thanking her father for the new posters they'd gotten her, but with the previous tension, she decided it might be better to wait a little longer, perhaps when her father was in a better mood. Then again, it wasn't as if he was in a bad mood; he just never really liked it when Rainbow didn't pull through with the great expectations he had so often for her. It was just how he was.
The rest of dinnertime went along fairly smoothly, as Rainbow's father gradually got over the fact that she'd ditched flight camp's current term. Rainbow was just thankful neither of them had questioned her reasoning for leaving, even if her father had dropped a suspicious glance when he'd heard it. He hadn't said anything of it, though, and that was good enough for her.
Rainbow excused herself from the table once she was finished, and headed back to her room for some sleep. She was awfully tired from the trip home, as well as from her own now distraught mentality. She hoped things would be clearer once she'd gotten a good rest for the first time in a few days, or at least that being home would make things easier. Not having to face everyone at the camp, including Gilda, would be a nice change for a while, even if she did miss having someone to talk to who sort of understood her. Gilda liked girls too, right? She really had no idea, but she supposed so.
All her thoughts soon dissipated, though, as the world around her went dark, and she fell into slumber.