//------------------------------// // Chapter 2 // Story: War Criminals // by Dirty Bit //------------------------------// Chapter 2 To Live in a Land of Justice Everyone present in the ballroom continued to stare; Discord and his new associates stared at Princess Celestia while she returned it with the same strength of all of them combined. Between them grew a faint sense of tension that began to increase in the first party, and Discord finally felt obligated to break the ice as he floated between them, his arms spread in a halting motion "Okay, okay, I know what everyone's thinking, and I'm willing to not only elaborate on that, but sort out this little conundrum." He glided towards Celestia, floating next to her while looking away innocenty "Discord, what's with the strange and possibly not-so-good company?" The draconequus then quickly flew towards Lucci's side with the same expression, holding out an eagle claw "Discord, why is there a white alicorn with a wavy mane and a sun all over her round flank?" Discord ignored the dirty glare he received from Celestia for his remark as he continued with a smile "Well, allow me to give you both the 411 right after we go over another introduction session!" Discord glided back to the solar princess' side and motioned a lion paw towards her "Well, friends, allow me to introduce you to one of the rulers of Equestria. She's often revered as a goddess by her subjects, and is responsible for monitoring the sun in the sky." Kumadori processed the information that was passed on to him and his comrades; a ruler; a goddess; a controller of the sun; each key point made the kabuki performer's opened eye grow wider as his jaw gradually dropped. Discord continued despite Kumadori's growing shock "I'd like for all of you to meet Equestria's very own-" "Amaterasu~!" Everyone, including Discord and Celestia did not expect the loud interruption that was caused by Kumadori, who quickly knelt and bowed his head in front of Celestia without hesitation "Yoyoyoyoi~! Oh, great, great Amaterasu~! We're not worthy to be in your he-heavenly presence~!" He bellowed submissively. Celestia and Discord stared at Kumadori's gesture with their own respective gazes of befuddlement before glancing towards each other, the latter of which shrugged after a moment of pause. Celestia looked back down at the pink-haired giant in front of her and smiled awkwardly "Your kind words are appreciated, but I'm not exactly who you think I am." She said gently. Kumadori lifted his head, his eyebrows furrowed "What~? But how can you not be she who provides us with the precious sunlight from her gracious throne above all~!?" Celestia tried not to laugh at how Kumadori asked his question and regained her composure "I have a throne, but I wouldn't think myself as a goddess, even if I have an immortal lifespan." She smiled warmly at Kumadori "I am Princess Celestia of Equestria. It's nice to see that you're not one to skip formalities." Kumadori rose from his kneeling position and held out one hand while gripping his shakujo with the other "It is always customary to show courtesy towards those you meet~! Es-es-es-especially when it is one of royal status~!" Jabra facepalmed "Every damned time with this guy, I swear..." He muttered irritably. Discord smiled "Not to worry, my boy, I'll save you all the trouble of speaking and address you to Celestia as well." He winked out and reappeared next to Kalifa "In an effort to avoid inaccurate judgement, allow me to introduce you to the token female of the bunch. Her name is Kalifa, and she can be very...erm..." He stroked his goatee while looking up pensively "What's the word I'm looking for?" "Beautiful?" Kalifa offered while looking up at Discord. Discord rolled the wrist of his lion paw "Something along the lines of ladylike." "That's sexual harassment..." Discord pointed at Kalifa while looking at Celestia innocently "Yeah, something like that." He glided back towards Kumadori and motioned both arms towards him with an amused smile "This gentle giant here is Kumadori, who I believe has quite the flair for the dramatic." Kumadori turned his head to leer at Discord with his one eye before turning his body and facing him, striking another kabuki pose "Yoyoi~! How rude~! The path I follow would be that of the Sennin~, if not the Ronin~!" Celestia gave a knowing nod "I see; so you're lifestyle's similar to that of Neighponese culture." She smiled "I should've known by your facial appearance and body movements; I'm honored to meet you." Kumadori instantly knelt and bowed to Celestia again "Your grace and serenity knows no bounds~! You are most, most definitely like that of the great Amaterasu~!" Jabra growled "Would you cut the crap already, Kumadori? You're tossing what's left of your pride in the garbage. I already told you that a real man shouldn't bow his head to anybody!" He chided. Celestia looked behind Kumadori to examine Jabra, feeling mildly entertained by his words "I see we have somepony who favors their masculinity." She quipped playfully. Discord rolled his eyes "I'll say. He'd fit right in at Canterlot's tavern if he ever saw fit to go there." He motioned a paw towards Jabra "But I digress; that fellow over there would be Jabra, and he has a tendency to call it like he sees it." Jabra grinned at Discord "Damn straight. I can't say I'm all too engrossed by this place, but it doesn't look bad so far." Celestia placed a hoof over her muzzle, chuckling into it "Well, I'm sure you'll enjoy the rest of the castle once Discord feels the need to show you around." She looked at the rest of the group until her eyes fell on Lucci, who stared back at her dispassionately. Something seemed off to her as she looked into his cold eyes. Discord mulled over on who to introduce next until he followed Celestia's gaze "Ah, you're curious about pigeon man over here?" He pointed an eagle claw "His name is Rob Lucci, a.k.a. Mr. Personality. He likes to keep to himself." He tilted his head "Say, Robby, does your pigeon have a name as well?" "Hattori..." Lucci replied curtly until he narrowed his eyes "And don't call me that again..." He uttered coldly. Discord waved a dismissive paw "Alright, alright, I get it. Not one for nicknames." He smiled shortly after "Anywho, that man next to him with the hat and the long beak is Kaku, who I find to be the most polite of the group." He complimented. Kaku gave an embarrassed smile "Well, you took us by surprise back there, but at least you meant well." He paused before pointing at his nose with a frown "Also, this isn't a beak; it's a nose..." Kaku corrected firmly. Discord nodded in confirmation before pointing to Blueno "Here's another who's almost similar to Rob, only he looks almost like a minotaur. His name is Blueno, which rhymes with uno." He grinned "I'd say he would have a personality as colorful as his name if one got to know him better." The draconequus chortled at his own joke. Blueno merely shifted his eyes away and sweatdropped 'That joke was bad, even for him...' Discord motioned his arms to Fukuro, whose mouth was currently zipped up "And last but not least, we have Mr. Chatterbox over here who claims to be a 'silent owl' of sorts. His name is Fukuro." "That's a God-awful lie, and you know it." Jabra spat tersely. Discord smirked "I do, but SHE doesn't..." He said before turning to Celestia, amusement clear on his face "Go on, Celly. Try him out." He said with an encouraging grin. Celestia was skeptical at first before she focused her attention on the loud mass "It's nice to meet you." She said politely. Fukuro unzipped his mouth and spoke "I don't think some of my friends feel the same way about you, chapapa." He said absentmindedly. Celestia craned her head back with a quizzical glance, and her confusion intensified when she saw Jabra twitching an irritated eye at Fukuro while he bared his teeth, then saw how Blueno, Kalifa, and Kaku each looked away awkwardly. Kumadori simply got up and hopped back to stand beside his subordinates with his legs arched 'They really are a group unlike anything seen in my time...' Once again, her eyes fell on Lucci as he remained frozen in his position. Discord shrugged "Well, that's everybody, which only leaves the explanation as to why they're here with me." He hovered in front of Celestia "You see, these ragtag group of..." He looked back at the former agents "Humans?" He received a simultaneous nod from each of them before turning back to the solar princess "These humans are seeking refuge and just so happened to have stumbled upon the same pile of chaos magic you wanted me to get rid of. Isn't that funny?" He grinned. "What are you getting at, Discord? Are you saying that they were born from your magic?" Celestia inquired. Discord grinned "Even better. It turns out my field of chaos magic happened to be an interdimensional portal, and these folks just crossed into it from their world!" He flexed an arm and made a muscle "I knew my magic was strong, but I never thought I was capable of that much chaotic potential." Celestia stood dumbfounded after Discord's explanation. It had drawn out the reason that the group before her appeared to be so different to what was commonly seen around Equestria, let alone the entire world. She looked up at him while he pecked admirably at his muscle "And you're saying they're seeking refuge? From what?" Discord ceased his self-admiration and pointed a claw at the former agents, a look of sympathy on his face "These poor souls were part of something big that I have no knowledge of, and their boss happened to cut them loose AND tried to pin the blame on them. Isn't that just unfair?" He turned to the agents, namely Lucci, and tilted his head "I know mum's the word with you, but could you possibly give me a hint towards your former occupation?" Lucci stared at Discord, Hattori giving off a neutral coo on his shoulder, then turned to Celestia, who also gazed upon him intently. He paused before speaking "We're envoys of justice...Each and every one of us. Our purprose is to ensure that evil does not flourish in our world." He stated monotonously. Discord smiled "Well, what do you know? It seems we have a group of kindred spirits that could possibly follow the same path we do." He said as he looked at Celestia "I'll bet they used to be guards that help keep the peace of their beloved nation..." "Actually, we're assassins, chapapa." Fukuro said impulsively. The entire ballroom went silent after the sudden confession, and Jabra and Blueno both felt obligated to knock the loud mass in the face at the same time, making him fall to the floor. Discord tilted his head at Fukuro while he laid down "They still make those?" He said incredulously. Celestia blinked "Did I hear him correctly? All of you are assassins?" She asked inquisitively. Kaku sighed in disappointment over Fukuro's habit of giving off information at the drop of a hat. He regarded Celestia with a frown that betrayed no nonsense, knowing their cover had been blown "I'm afraid that Fukuro speaks the truth. We used to be assassins, but now we're nothing more than wandering fugitives with no place to call home." "Note that we have no intention of making a home here." Lucci added, no change in his tone "We have personal issues of our own to tend to once we leave, but until then we're under the care of Discord." Discord nodded with a smirk "And they know that my word is law." He turned to the assassins "Not that I'm gonna act like one of those snobby nobles; consider me as one of those connectable leaders." He said as his body parts fell apart into a pile on the floor, then reconnected themselves as the draconequus grinned "See? Easy as pie!" He looked over at Celestia, who gazed at him with a firm glance "...What?" He said as he blinked at her. Celestia's eyes narrowed slightly "A word, Discord? In private, please?" She requested in a leveled tone. Discord knew exactly what was coming: He was going to get both of his ears - and possibly his horns - chewed off by an angry goddess over the fact that he brought in a group of killers with his magic. Smiling confidently, he held up a paw "Of course, Celly." He turned to Lucci and the others, pointing up a talon "Okay, folks, I'm gonna have a little chat with this one for a split second. I want you all to stand still until I get back." Kaku bowed properly "Of course. Take your time." He replied politely. Discord smiled at the compliance towards his request and nonchalantly floated out of the ballroom with Celestia, making sure to shut the doors. Once they were in the halls, they distanced themselves a few feet before coming to a stop. The draconequus was ready to defend himself "Before you feel the need to turn me back into stone, let it be known that I had no knowledge of this myself. Moreso, they don't seem the type to just kill anything without reason." Celestia frowned "It's not just that. Not only do we know the capability behind your magic, we're under the possibility that their pursuers could follow them here and cause unrest around Baltimare." Discord gave a knowing nod "Your concern is noted." He frown shortly after "But you realize that the situation's out of my grasp. I can't just get rid of the magic field now since they wish to leave after they've laid low long enough, and even if I did, I'm not certain if I can make another portal just like that considering it was a last ditch effort to relieve my towering surplus at the time." Celestia leered at Discord "You realize that you'll not only be responsible for the actions of your new associates, but with whatever might come out of your field next. This is no laughing matter." She paused when Discord chuckled defiantly, as if trying to lighten the mood. Sadly, he only succeeded in further infuriating Celestia "This is serious!" She raised her voice, causing the draconequus to flinch "Listen, Discord, as far as this situation goes, I'm unable to lend much assistance to the matter myself." Discord smirked "So you ARE willing to help me despite the fact I welcomed a band of deadly assassins into our peaceful home? I'm happy you'd do that for me." Celestia sighed "Well, they carry a heavy burden thrust upon themselves against their will, and they said they would only be here for a short time until they see fit to leave Equestria. I cannot think of a reason to brush them off in their time of need." She admitted, much to her chagrin over Discord's slight folly. Celestia looked up at him, her irritation lowered "Also, I'd like for you to know that I'm considering to offer you places to where you can release your magic without any consequences or dreading causalities once this is over." Discord grinned before trapping Celestia in a hug "Now you've gone and brightened my day, Celly! You won't regret this at all, I swear it!" He proclaimed cheerfully. Celestia grunted before she offered a serious gaze "Just remember, you're responsible for every action caused by those assassins." Discord released his grip and held up his arms, eyes closed in confidence "Don't worry about a thing. I'll make sure that they won't need to practice their profession willy nilly without reason." He opened his eyes after his words and grinned sheepishly "That is...make sure they won't kill anypony." He paused before scoffing "Oh, what am I saying? Equestria's the most peaceful country the world has ever known! There isn't much to worry about, is there?" Celestia rubbed her chin with a hoof "Perhaps we can discuss this with them, and convince them to behave properly during their stay." "Excuse me..." Discord and Celestia stared blankly at each other before they noticed a curious Luna standing behind them "Can you two fill me in on whatever it is you're talking about? What's all this business about assassins?" Luna inwardly regretted asking her question once she caught Discord giving her a toothy grin; an unnerving sight to her eyes. _____ Jabra continuously stomped on Fukuro's face angrily while Blueno watched the loud mass writhe in agony on his back "No matter the distance, you'll always flab those stupid gums of yours to everybody you see! We'd be lucky not to be thrown out of here had you just KEPT YOUR MOUTH SHUT!" He shouted at Fukuro's bruised face. Fukuro moaned in pain "But we're not agents anymore, so we don't have much secrets to keep, chapapa..." "That isn't the point, you dolt!" Jabra snapped as he continued to pummel Fukuro. Kaku watched the merciless beating and hung his head with a frown "This ordeal could've gone better than expected, but I suppose we can't really do much in our current status." He looked over at Lucci, who had his eyes closed while standing around "What are your thoughts about this place, Lucci?" Lucci opened his eyes towards Kaku "Even if I haven't had the full tour yet, I don't really care much for this place." He looked away "My thoughts are on vanquishing Spandam once we get the chance and nothing else..." Kaku placed his hands on his hips, disappointment in his eyes "You really have a one-track mind sometimes." He looked over at Kalifa, who was far from the group and staring out the window "I wonder how Kalifa is taking this turn of events." "Leave her be." Lucci said "She's possibly torn about ending up in this place, and I don't blame her..." He squinted his eyes "Whoever heard of a world populated by talking horses? It's utter nonsense..." Kaku raised an eyebrow at Lucci "With all due respect, we've witnessed similar feats back in our world." Lucci frowned "This is nothing compatible with what we've been faced with throughout the duration of our lives before our arrival. Unless this world has an abundance of Zoan Devil fruit, it's nothing more than a colorful farce." He stated abrasively. Hattori cooed with an uncertain look in his eyes. Jabra hopped off of Fukuro and grunted "Guess that makes two of us. Those two creatures we just saw back there were beyond freaky; It makes me wonder how the rest of this world works." Fukuro, who had survived Jabra stomping his face, lifted himself up to a sitting position "I kind of like it here so far, and we haven't seen it all yet, chapapa." Blueno crossed his arms "I'm curious to see what this Equestria is like. Would pirates actually exist in a place like this?" Kumadori continuously prodded the floor with the end of his shakujo, gripped with both hands as he sat down with his legs crossed "Yoyoi~! If the odious scum do exist here, we shall not show no mer-mercy towards them whatsoever~!" His prodding increased in speed "Heaven's net is wide~, but let's nothing through~!" Jabra grinned eagerly at Kumadori "I hear ya. I'd say it would make for good exercise if we actually found some pirates skulking about in this place." Kaku looked over at Kalifa, who still had her eyes glued to the window. He was curious to see what she was looking at outside, and chose to meet up with her to catch a glimpse of the view himself. Outside was a vast and lush garden similar to that of a rainforest, teeming with peaceful wildlife of different kinds. Kaku found the sight to be breathtaking 'Perhaps this was what drove Kalifa to silence...Amazing...' Unbeknownst to Kaku, Kalifa was thinking to herself over what could be seen in Equestria other than just Baltimare and Canterlot. It was nearly maddening to think that this would grasp her attention more than the ambition of exacting revenge on Spandam with her friends. She pressed her glasses in front of her eyes and hummed "I wonder how long Discord and Celestia will be until we take our little tour..." Kaku, mildly surprised by Kalifa speaking, looked over at her "Well, I'm certain they wouldn't take too long, since Discord is likely to take care of us and show us around." Suddenly, the ballroom doors burst open to reveal a grinning Discord holding what appeared to be a midnight blue version of Celestia, a look of shock on her face "Surprise~!" He shouted. Celestia herself followed shortly after, a hoof seen covering her face. Blueno looked over at the new pony and arched an eyebrow "This is unexpected..." The new pony held her look of shock before turning her head at Discord with an aggravated gaze "Put me down, please..." Discord did as he was told and motioned a paw towards the alicorn "Well, we're back, everyone, and we've brought a new occupant who happens to be curious about your background. Meet Princess Luna, Celestia's younger sister. As opposed to her sister, Luna is responsible for monitoring the moon." Kalifa looked over at Luna, then walked towards her with an observing glance "I see. So if you both are princesses, then where are the-" Out of nowhere, a zipper appeared on Kalifa's lips that sealed her mouth shut, causing her to muffle a startled yelp of confusion. Jabra and Fukuro themselves were amazed by it "Ah! She's just like me now, chapapa!" The latter blurted out. Jabra wondered if he would possibly request Discord to remove Fukuro's mouth for his sake. Discord grinned sheepishly "Forgive the gesture, Kalifa, but it's a bit of a touchy subject between Celestia and Luna; they don't really wish to talk about it." Luna looked up at Discord "Your care is appreciated, but the action was unneeded, Discord." She said calmly as she hung her head with a solemn frown "Everypony would ask us the same question from time to time, and it's not like they would ignore the concept of their land being ruled by just princesses alone." She stated morosely. Discord snapped his talons and relinquished the zipper from Kalifa's mouth. She tentatively felt her lips while Celestia spoke up "Your question can easily be answered as far as our rule. Luna and I are co-rulers of Equestria, working as a diarchy among the land." Kalifa regained her composure and looked at Celestia "Has your rule proven to be stable as of late?" Celestia rolled her eyes "Admittedly, there had been some obstacles before your arrival, but they've been taken care of." She pointed a hoof with a mischievous smile "Your current caretaker happened to be one of those obstacles." Discord crossed his arms and looked away with a mock scowl "Sure, blame the draconequus..." Celestia smiled genuinely as she continued "Essentially, our land proves to be quite peaceful. You're in good hooves as long as you stay here." "I disagree to that statement..." Everyone present in the room turned to Lucci, whose narrowed eyes bristled with profound skepticism "There is no such thing as an entirely peaceful area; there will always be one individual or thing that would oppose the ideals you stand by, and they wouldn't rest until their own goals have been met. Those are the same threatening iota of scum that we seek to rid of until there are none left..." Celestia stared back at Lucci after his harsh statement. It was nice to see him open up, but she found his mindset to be questionable "I see that you're adamant on your goals, but I assure you that there is not much to worry about in Equestria. If there was, then we would be ready for it." Discord coughed into his eagle talon, the word 'changeling invasion' murmured in between his coughs. Celestia glared up at him, and he simply looked away while whistling innocently. Lucci huffed "So I was correct...This world of yours may appear peaceful, but there are always certain eyesores that need to be wiped from existence. If you give us the order, we shall terminate them immediately, and consider it a gesture of gratitude for offering us a place to stay..." Celestia was unsettled by Lucci's offer, but at the same time curious of his background more than the rest of his friends. To her, Lucci held the virtue and valor seen in her guards, but what was said by him made it appear to be more extreme. The worst part was that she knew he was serious just by looking into his cold and calculating eyes "Lucci, I'm aware of your path to ensure justice, but your offer doesn't sound virtuous at all. It sounds as if you wish to-" "Kill them?" Lucci assumed in deadpan "I don't believe you're fully aware of the path that I follow, so allow me to enlighten you, your majesty." He held out a hand, his fingers clenched to resemble a claw "The path that I follow, the very belief that I practice through my life is known as Dark Justice. Whenever a foul-minded being shows themselves to me, they shall be met with swift execution." The former agent balled his fingers into a fist "I kill for the sake of upholding peace and making sure that evil will not hold sway; I joined my former colleagues so that I could legally kill those that are a threat to justice." He ignored the troubled looks Discord, Celestia, and Luna showed him as he continued without missing a beat "I'm unaware of how you handle problems here, but I spare no criminal their life." Lucci's eyes narrowed to slits "The same can be said for those who would have the sheer audacity to surrender to evil themselves, willingly or otherwise. All of those people do not even deserve to live...That is my way of Dark Justice." His subordinates all looked away with their own respective expressions of indifference. Celestia couldn't believe what she heard. She was aware of the fact that Lucci and his friends were assassins, but he confirmed that he held no remorse for any of his actions. She stared back with resolve "Do you not realize the hypocrisy in your statement? That you would kill for the sake of peace?" Lucci drew back his arm and stared back "What of it? I care not for the thoughts of others, but I believe it to be necessary if it means maintaining order and peace in the world. You would actually go so far as to sparing the lives of the wicked?" Discord stared blankly before looking away innocently 'Awkwaaaard~...' Celestia frowned "I won't lie when I wished for certain criminals to disappear from my beloved country earlier in my time, but killing them off would solve nothing." She closed her eyes "Murder would only breed despair and sorrow that would spread like wildfire, and possibly force others to imitate your actions for the sake of getting even or for personal enjoyment." She opened her eyes, a serene glimmer and centuries of knowledge behind them "Here in our world, we practice the Magic of Friendship and prosper from the lessons learned through each of our days; we extend a hoof to those that wish to see the Magic of Friendship for themselves. You may not see it our way, but we can confirm that our efforts have been successful in the past. We haven't seen much ill activity recently, and it has remained that way through most of Equestria's history." Lucci stared at Celestia before he scoffed "You expect me to believe such a thing?" He got no reaction from his question "Friendship? Camaraderie? That is the key to prosperity in this world?" He asked condescendingly. Celestia's resolve did not waver "It may sound ludicrous to you, but it has kept peace not only in Equestria, but between other nations as well. True, there are those that don't carry the same beliefs that I'm sharing with you, but even they know not to take away one's life just because they've committed crimes." Lucci sneered at the answer he received "That is unbelievably naive for anyone to follow. I fail to see how the aspect of friendship can even maintain order in your world. Relying on others is nothing but a sign of weakness, and weakness itself is an unforgivable sin..." Luna stepped in with narrowed eyes "I believe you've said enough of your personal ideals. Just who are you to decide who lives and who doesn't?" Lucci shifted his eyes to Luna "Of course...We haven't properly met yet. My name is Rob Lucci." He replied nonchalantly, brushing off Luna's anger. Discord could cut the tension between Lucci and the royal sisters with a knife. He fidgeted his claws before he came between them "Look, I love to talk philosophy as much as the next pony, but why don't we have ourselves that tour we mentioned before we talk more?" He said with a hopeful smile as he looked between the three. Lucci stared up at Discord, then turned his back on him and the two ponies "Fine by me. This whole conversation proved to be meaningless in hindsight..." Luna glared at Lucci "How dare you-" Discord quickly hovered in front of her and frantically waved his arms while shaking his head. Celestia sighed to herself before she nodded to the former agents "I'll leave you all with Discord while I go clear my mind and get back to my duties." She looked over at Lucci, who still had his back turned on her "Hopefully, we can discuss our views on better terms." Celestia said in a neutral tone. Lucci cast a sideways glance at Celestia "Don't count on it. Your views on justice and friendship mean nothing to me..." Hattori stared at Lucci before cooing at Celestia. Celestia frowned in response, unhappy with both the harshness in Lucci's statement and what he had been through to accumulate such foreboding thoughts in his mind. She turned away without another word and trotted off into the halls of the castle. Luna, while angry with Lucci over him talking down on her sister's views, was curious about the rest of his group. She looked at each one and frowned "Am I to believe you all think the same as your friend?" Jabra chuckled "It's a bit of a grey area for us." He then grunted disapprovingly "As for the whole 'friend' thing, I'd drop that. That kitten over there's lucky to be my rival." As expected from his insult, he and Lucci shared another piercing glare against each other. Discord placed a paw on his forehead "Wow...All the chaos I could ask for and it wasn't the kind I'd hope to see." He looked over at Lucci "I think we should work on your people skills while you stay here..." Discord received no response as Lucci and Jabra continued to leer at each other. Kaku walked up to Discord and held up his arms "I apologize for Lucci's behavior on his behalf. We all have been trained under extreme circumstances, and he took his training seriously." Discord smirked at Kaku "Polite as ever, I see." He held up a paw "Nothing to worry about, since this would end up being a trivial matter anyhow. Why don't I show you folks around the castle?" Luna turned to Discord "I'd like to join you and get better acquainted with our new guests." She gave the draconequus a quizzical glance "How did they even get here?" Discord shrugged "I'll fill you in on the details while we walk and talk." He turned to the assassins "Everyone, up and at 'em! You'll get to stretch your legs once more." Kumadori jumped onto one foot and struck a pose "Yoyoi~! So we're to be gui-gui-guided around~? And we shall travel with a princess as retainers to the throne~?" He stood on both feet and spun his shakujo before slinging it across his shoulders with his left hand, his right hand stuck out "We promise to abide by your every command, Chief Discord~!" He said as he moved his head around in a circle. Discord hummed to himself "Chief Discord...I like the sound of that!" He then motioned a paw "Come along now. We've got plenty of ground to cover and little time to do so." He hovered out of the room with an eager smile on his face while Luna trotted behind him. She looked back to see Lucci and the others follow after. Lucky for Kumadori and Fukuro, the doors were big enough for them to walk out of without having to crouch down or squeeze through any narrow passages. The group wandered the halls with Discord and Luna taking point, the assassins briefly introducing themselves to the princess of the night. Luna looked over at Discord "I believe you were going to tell me about their arrival?" Discord shrugged as he hovered ahead "Long story short, a period of withdrawal, followed by an inadvertently created interdimensional portal. Put it together, and you got those guys behind you...Oh, and one girl." "That's sexual harrassment..." "Love ya, too, babe!" Through their trail, the former agents happened to stumble upon ponies wearing golden armor, some of which were holding spears. The draconequus enjoyed himself upon seeing the gaping faces of the guards he passed. Jabra looked at each armored pony he passed and growled to himself 'Damn, I know they have guards and stuff, but this place is starting to bug me...' He looked up at Discord and thought of a question "Hey, Discord." The spirit of chaos floated upside down as he looked at Jabra "You're not exactly a pony, and I heard you mentioned of things other than ponies. What else lives in this place?" He asked curiously, albeit gruffly. Discord flipped himself to float right side up as he pointed a learning talon "An excellent question, friend. You're right that I'm not a pony, but I'm PART pony if that counts. As for what else lives in Equestria, a great number of different creatures and species reside here; some are wild, and some aren't. For those that aren't, you have minotaurs, griffons, zebras, changelings, and much more." He crossed his arms "But I find elaborating on that is kind of boring, so maybe I can trust you all to explore and discover the rest of Equestria once I feel you're ready to go out." Kalifa directed her gaze towards Discord "I would like that very much. As much as I'd love to live in a castle, this world has me rather curious..." Blueno nodded in agreement "Likewise." He looked over at Luna "Seeing as this is a castle, do you have a dungeon?" Luna looked over at Blueno "Yes, but we really don't have much of a use for it nowadays. We were thinking about refurbishing it into a line of guest rooms for weary travelers." She looked away "As far as what I've seen with my sister, we haven't been met with criminal activity of any sort recently." Lucci's eyes narrowed at the idea; turning a room meant for criminal containment into another set of living quarters. He was in no position to judge how the princesses would handle their problems, but the fact that he was in a world that could possibly be a cathartic children's story beckoned for him to leave and pursue Spandam again. Hattori tilted his head at Lucci and cooed at him, grabbing his attention. The pigeon regarded his owner with a look of concern, to which he merely stared back until choosing to look ahead again. Hattori heaved a birdlike equivalent to a sigh when Lucci refused to talk to him. At the end of the group, Fukuro was skipping along the halls with a smile "This is great! I've never been in a castle before, chapapa!" He chirped, almost feeling the need to dance and sing. Kumadori, who walked alongside Fukuro, gripped his shakujo with his hands as he looked up at the ceiling "Yoyoi~! I, too, feel invigorated just being inside such a glorious building~!" Luna smiled back at Fukuro and Kumadori "I'm glad you're enjoying the tour so far. Is there anywhere else you wish to go next?" Jabra thought on the decision until his stomach rumbled. Placing a hand to his chest, he looked down at it with a frown "There's a thought. We haven't had much to eat on our ship." Discord clasped his paw and claw together "Very well, I can fix you all up a meal if your interested." He then stared off into space before leaning his head towards Kaku, an eyebrow raised "Are humans perhaps similar to ponies in eating habits?" Kaku shook his head "Sadly, no. We're omnivorous in nature." After hearing Kaku, Jabra stopped dead in his tracks, earning the attention of the others. His jaw dropped at the realization of where he is "Wait a minute...Does that mean..." He grasped his head with both of his hands as his eyes widened "We can't eat meat here!?" Jabra shouted in worry. He ignored the small amount of guards that stared apprehensively at him. Kalifa pressed her glasses towards her face "I'm nearly speechless that you haven't pieced it together that we're in a world of ponies until now..." Fukuro stood behind Kalifa with a blank stare "Does this mean we have to start eating hay now, chapapa?" Jabra instantly turned to glare at Fukuro "Like hell I am!" While Fukuro and Jabra continued their banter, Luna stared at them before turning to Discord with a dull expression "I supposed you haven't figured that out yet either, have you?" Discord merely scratched one of his horns as he stared at the quarreling assassins "Nope, did not think that one through..." He replied in a straight tone. Luna placed a hoof on her temple "Between your shenanigans and your current responsibility, I worry about you sometimes, Discord..." Discord smiled at Luna "At least I know that you and your sister still care about my well-being." He clapped his paw and claw to grab the group's attention "Simmer down, friends. We can work something out. I'm sure that there could be certain dishes that can tickle your fancy." Jabra ceased his ranting and crossed his arms "Well, if you don't have meat, do you at least have some booze? I'd settle for that." Blueno rubbed his chin while keeping cool about the situation "If we're going to abide by a vegetarian diet here, then we might as well have some salad or fruit. No point in going hungry just because we can't eat meat." Jabra growled at Blueno "Easy for you to say. Do you have any idea how hard it is to go without a nice juicy steak? It's gonna be torture to be without meat for so long!" "How petulant of you. I thought you would be more resilient in nature as a wolf, yet here you are griping about not being able to eat what you want...You can be such a child sometimes." Lucci said abrasively while Hattori shook his head at Jabra in disappointment. Jabra bared his teeth at Lucci, then pointed a finger towards him "Just you wait until you see where I'm coming from! You'll get no sympathy from me when that happens!" Kumadori spread his arms out while his shakujo rested behind his back "Yoyoi~! There is no need to be upset, Jabra~! We're lucky to be cared for by these ge-ge-ge-generous icons~!" Jabra snarled at the kabuki performer "You, too!? Why does no one back me up on this?" Luna giggled at Jabra's frustration and spoke up "You know, we have some wine, if that would calm you down." Jabra looked over at Luna, his anger softened "Wine, huh? What about sake? Any of that around here?" Luna shook her head "I'm sorry, but we haven't requested any shipments of foreign alcohol. But I'm sure you'll be satisfied with what is offered." Jabra stuck a thumb up "If you have something strong enough to keep me thinking about meat, then I'll go for it!" Lucci directed his gaze towards Luna "Just try to ignore the words coming out of that mutt's mouth...He'll calm himself down eventually." Jabra growled at Lucci after his insult. Luna stared at Lucci and Jabra "Do you both have a penchant for labeling each other as animals? You don't seem like it at all to me..." "Actually, he's being truthful to a point." Kaku explained as he pointed a finger at himself "Between me, Jabra, and Lucci, we're all animal hybrids." Discord eyed Kaku with a raised eyebrow "Oh? Then how do you explain your 'silent owl'?" Kaku scratched the back of his head "Well, the others merely resemble animals, if that answers your question." He answered awkwardly. Discord tittered to himself 'They'll be in for a treat if I decide to visit-' He perked up before a wide smile slowly crept onto his face 'I have an idea that Celestia might agree with...' "Okay, to the dining room, then. We'll fill your bellies and talk more from there!" He said as he snapped his talons and teleported himself and the others to an ornate dining room with a long table covered in a fine alabaster cloth found in the center. Though Luna was taken by surprise at first, she easily went with Discord's habit of teleporting randomly. Kalifa gave an impressed smile after viewing the room "Very nice. I admire the scenery." Luna looked at the group "I'll order the chefs to prepare you all a meal. In the meantime, I wish for you all to be patient." Blueno nodded "We shall. But keep in mind that we request for salads with lettuce; no hay or flowers of any sort, please." Jabra waved his right hand in a shooing motion "Whatever, just don't forget the booze." He said impatiently. Luna narrowed her eyes at Jabra before she made her leave. Discord smirked before he looked at the group of assassins "I'm going with little Lu-Lu as well, so the lot of you should stay put." He said before following after Luna. After they left, Kalifa pushed her glasses in front of her eyes, a playful smile on her face "You know, Jabra...Seeing as how Luna is responsible for moving the moon..." Jabra bared his teeth in a scowl "If you comment about me howling at the moon, I swear to God I'll end you..." He threatened without facing Kalifa. _____ As Luna entered the kitchen with the many chefs working, Discord slinked in after her and grinned "Luna, can we talk for a moment?" Luna turned to Discord with a curious glance "About what exactly?" Discord couldn't hide the mischief behind his smile "It involves Rob and his personal views..." Luna grunted with a glare directed towards the floor "That one lives with unreprimanded gall to just say those cruel things to Celestia..." She looked up at Discord "What does this talk have to do with him?" Discord rubbed his claw and paw together "This'll be something to discuss with Celly once we reach her, but what say we give the young scarecrow a crash course in friendship?" He asked persuasively. Luna stared before her eyes widened "You don't mean...?" "Oh, yes..." Discord smirked "If it worked with a monster like me...why not a monster like him?" The draconequus asked with a devious tone. Normally, Luna would decide against what scheme Discord would have in his mind, be it an extreme prank that would get him into trouble or something worse, but a mischievous smile of her own was seen on her face "For once, you propose an excellent idea. Maybe this would be what Mr. Lucci needs to see my sister's point of view..." Discord pointed a talon "She's next to know once we catch up with her. I'm certain she'll agree with us..." "Agree with what?" Luna and Discord noticed one of the chefs staring at them with his head tilted "Erm...Was I not supposed to listen?" He asked hesitantly. Discord stared back before waving Luna towards the chef, to which she cleared her throat and showed her regal demeanor "It was nothing to worry about. We would like to request for you to make a set of salads for some guests complete with a bottle of our finest wine." She requested gracefully. The chef shifted his uneasy glance between the two immortal figures before trotting away to spread the order to his coworkers. Discord chuckled "What say we go run this by your dear sister while the others are distracted?" Luna frowned "But they'll know we'll be gone for too long. How will you manage to do so?" Discord grinned as he snapped a talon "Taken care of..." Out in the dining room, another Discord appeared next to the assassins, only he wore a blue flamenco costume and held maracas in his paw and claw "And now, some entertainment before your meal arrives!" A song began to play out of nowhere as Discord began to dance while shaking his maracas. The assassins stared with their own respective expressions; Lucci and Blueno remained stone-faced; Kaku, Jabra, and Kalifa stared in befuddlement; Fukuro and Kumadori stared in intrigue. After a short moment, the two giants hopped in and danced with Discord using unique moves of their own. While the other agents sweatdropped at their action, Lucci wanted to kill Fukuro and Kumadori just for making this sight worse on himself. _____ Celestia was currently wrapping up her brief walk before returning to her business around the castle. As she walked, however, she was still bothered by what was said to her as far as killing for the sake of justice. She opened the doors to the throne room and trotted along the red carpet as she thought to herself about Lucci's views. "The path that I follow, the very belief that I practice through my life is known as Dark Justice. Whenever a foul-minded being shows themselves to me, they shall be met with swift execution. I kill for the sake of upholding peace and making sure that evil will not hold sway; I joined my former colleagues so that I could legally kill those that are a threat to justice." "You expect me to believe such a thing? Friendship? Camaraderie? That is the key to prosperity in this world? That is unbelievably naive for anyone to follow. I fail to see how the aspect of friendship can even maintain order in your world. Relying on others is nothing but a sign of weakness, and weakness itself is an unforgivable sin..." She could not fathom what horrid life Lucci had led in order to think the way he does, but Celestia hoped that he could at least consider a different outlook on life rather than claiming his profession as a means of maintaining peace. Before she could close the doors, however, she noticed Luna and Discord approaching her with smiles on their faces. Celestia blinked at them "Do you wish to see me?" Luna grinned "Of course, sister. Discord has hatched an ingenious plan that could prove your point to Lucci." Celestia was intrigued as she turned to the draconequus "What do you have in mind, Discord?" Discord held out his paws "Picture if you will, somepony who has been so heartless in his time and was lucky enough to be given a second chance. Who to turn to for guidance, you ask?" He grinned "Why not your new princess and her friends?" Celestia widened her eyes "What?" She hung her head down, a look of mild anxiety on her face "I'm not so sure about this; I couldn't force such a burden on her after her ascension..." "Hey, I'M the responsible one here, remember?" Discord said as he smiled "Besides, it won't be just her...And look at it this way, maybe Lucci's buddies are bound to make a switch before he does! Think about this, Celestia; the Elements of Harmony turned my life around...Just imagine what could happen once they've taught those assassins some lessons as well." He motioned his claw and paw towards Celestia "You'll have your cake and eat it, too! Metaphorically speaking..." Luna nodded in agreement "As far as learning about friendship, maybe Twilight Sparkle can bring up your views in better words with the help of her friends." Celestia pondered about this. At first, she was hesitant on account of the fact that Discord was looking after a group of assassins. Admittedly, they had their own colorful personalities, but she was not keen on sending them in the care of the Elements of Harmony and expecting quick results. Although, Discord brought up a good point on how his own reformation was successful thanks to them. She looked up at Discord, who wore a confident grin on his face before she herself cracked a ghost of a smile "Maybe you're onto something..." Discord waggled his eyebrows "Aren't I always?" He quipped as he placed a paw on his chest "To make it easier on you, they won't be staying there. It'll be nothing short of periodic visits to help them get out more and connect with other ponies. Leave the sleeping arrangements to moi." Luna arched an eyebrow at Discord "Where could you find a resting area in the castle to fit a band of wayward assassins?" Discord waved a claw in Luna's face "Chaos magic, remember? I'll improvise." Celestia smiled at the draconequus after he presented his idea "I wish you the best of luck in teaching them about friendship." Discord grinned "Why not start after they've had their meals? Once the little ponies see their new students, the looks on their faces will be priceless!" Both royal sisters looked uneasy "I think it would be wise to warn Twilight and her friends ahead of time..." Celestia stated flatly. "Aww, but where's the fun in that?" Discord pouted "Besides, it's not like they want to see more of Equestria for themselves." Luna shook her head "Be that as it may, it would do no good to surprise the element bearers with creatures from another dimension." Discord huffed "Says you! I'm sure a certain pretty pink party pony would welcome them with open hooves. Wait and see..." Celestia chuckled at Discord before she levitated a quill and parchment towards her "I'll send the letter. Perhaps you should explain your 'field trip' with your associates then." Discord beamed at the solar princess "Gladly! If you'll excuse me, ladies..." The draconequus winked out of existence, leaving Celestia to jot down her letter while Luna contemplated the future for Discord's guests. _____ The line of chefs stared at the unusual guests with eyes wide as dinner plates while they were eating their salads and drinking their wine. Lucci ignored the chefs as he poured a glass of wine being held by Hattori's right wing. The pigeon carefully drank from it after it had been filled. Jabra hesitantly ate his salad, as opposed to his subordinates who not only ate properly, but enjoyed their meals. Blueno swallowed his bite and stared down at his food "This salad is exquisite. Those royal chefs really know how to prepare their food." Kaku smiled "I agree; it feels nice to eat something other than the rations on Very Good's ship." He stabbed his fork into his salad and took another bite. Jabra rested his chin on his left hand being held up by his elbow, a sour expression on his face as he made his fork dance on his dish "At least they had good food..." He muttered bitterly before chugging his own glass of wine in one fell swoop. Kumadori finished his own salad and heaved a sigh as his eyes were closed. The chefs all focused on the kabuki performer as he froze in his position before slowly getting up from his seat and grasping the shakujo that was found on his back. The chefs tensed up, thinking that the giant was displeased with their cooking and was about to punish them, until he stuck out his free hand "Gochi..." He uttered. The chefs blinked and one of them tilted their head at Kumadori quizzically "G-Gochi?" He parroted. "Gochi, gochi, gochi, gochi..." "Is it trying to communicate with us?" Another one asked nervously, backing away as Kumadori continued repeating his given word. "Gochi, gochi, gochi, gochi..." "Is it casting a spell?" A female chef inquired as her body shivered fearfully. "Gochi ni narimashita~!" Kumadori finally said, opening his left eye and showing a content grin on his face. The chefs stared at Kumadori in befuddlement once he showed his happiness. Jabra sneered at their oblivious faces and spoke "He said thanks for the meal..." This made the chefs chorus an 'Ooooooh' in response before they went back to their kitchen, their tension fading. The other Discord laughed "This is quite the spectacle. Imagine what would happen if we all went out!" There was a bulge in Discord's stomach until another smiling head sprouted from it, startling the assassins, save for Blueno and Lucci "Which is exactly what we're gonna do once you're finished eating!" The second draconequus vanished, leaving the original Discord to look at his guests "Well? Aren't you happy that you'll be going out with Yours Truly?" Jabra scowled at Discord "What makes you think I'd want to see what the rest of this place is like? It's bad enough there's no meat here, but I dunno if I wanna look at another pony." Kalifa held a thin smile "Ignoring Jabra, I am indeed happy to get a better look at Canterlot and what's inside." Discord pointed a talon up "About that...We're not gonna head out to Canterlot, per se, but rather another town." He smiled "It's another iconic landmark here in Equestria, so it'll be an enjoyable experience for all of you." He looked over at Lucci staring at him with his cold eyes and snickered "Okay, some of you..." Fukuro finished the rest of his salad and belched loudly "That was delicious." He said as he patted his stomach in satisfaction "I've never had such a good salad before, chapapa." The loud mass regarded Discord with his broad smile "Is this place any better than the castle?" Discord shrugged "Well, it's not royalty, but it's the thought that counts. You could say that a group of famous heroes live there." "Heroes, you say? Are they strong?" Kaku asked inquisitively after swallowing a bite of salad. Jabra shot a deadpan look towards the long-nosed agent "Are you taking the piss?" Kaku stared back at Jabra "We've seen what Discord is capable of; after the mention of heroes, who knows how strong they are?" Lucci kept silent while Kaku and Jabra talked with each other. Personally, he would disapprove, if not fully reject Kaku's opinion of Equestrian heroes being strong. He thought that if they followed the same ideals as Princess Celestia, then they would no doubt be as weak as insects. Hattori took another sip of his wine while he was perched on Lucci's shoulder. Blueno lightly pushed his plate away and dabbed a napkin on his lips before he stood up "I'm ready. You already have me more curious than before about this place, Chief Discord." Discord hugged himself with his arms and tittered "You're all going to make me blush if you keep on calling me chief like that. You're too kind!" Kalifa looked up at Discord "You were the one who took us in at our time of need, so we owe you that much, at least." She smiled herself as she stood up "What do you say you show us this area now? I look forward to what this world has to offer." Kaku and Jabra stared at Kalifa, surprised to see her smiling more than usual; They stared at each other in confusion before focusing on her again. Wanting to move things along, Kaku ate the last of his salad and stood up as well "I'm ready, too." Jabra watched how each of his fellow assassins were already finished with their meals and ready to leave, while he hasn't barely touched his own salad. He grunted and pushed his plate away before standing up, resting his hands behind his head "Fine, I guess I'll go, too..." He said brashly. All eyes rested on Lucci and Hattori, both of which still seated while they stared back at the group. As they stared expectantly, Hattori offered his emtpy glass to his owner, who set it on the table. Lucci huffed and stood up as he set his own glass down "Very well. Show us this 'iconic landmark' you speak of, Discord..." He said dispassionately. Discord balled his claws into fists as sheer giddiness was seen on his face "Glad to see you're as eager as your peers. Let's go, shall we?" He said as he snapped his talons and made him and the assassins teleport in a flash of light. _____ Golden Oaks Library; a central hub of knowledge found in the quaint town of Ponyville. Inside, a lavender alicorn was in her study going over a book that covered the basics of royal etiquette, a large stack of periodicals with related contents resting next to her table. Twilight Sparkle, the newest princess crowned by her mentor Princess Celestia, chose to remain in her home at the library and learn how to act properly through the books she borrowed from the Starswirl the Bearded wing. Celestia offered to have her be taught at the castle through the tutelage of stationed mentors, but after bringing up wishing to spend more time with her friends, the solar princess could not deny such a request from her former student. They keep in touch through letters now and then, but Twilight will one day become a proper princess once she experiences the certain hardships that come with it. "Twilight!" After turning a page, Twilight looked back at the entrance to her study to see her assistant Spike, a small purple dragon, waddle inside "Since you're buried in all that reading, would it be alright if I took a day off since I've already cleaned the library?" He asked with a hopeful smile. Twilight nodded to her assistant "Of course, Spike. Just as long as you don't do anything reckless like last time." She stated playfully with a smile to match. Spike held one claw in the air with another on his chest "It won't be like the timberwolf incident, I swear. I'll just go for a walk around Ponyville and see if I can't find anything interesting to do." Twilight turned back to her book "That's good, Spike. Have fun, okay?" Before Spike could respond, his cheeks puffed before he opened and produced both a loud belch and a stream of green fire. The fire dissipated to show a neatly wrapped scroll in the air bound by a royal seal; a letter from Princess Celestia. Twilight reflexively lit up her horn and caught the scroll midair in a magical aura, levitating in front of her and unraveling it to read its contents "Dear Twilight, This is a letter informing you that Discord will arrive in Ponyville shortly with some unexpected company. They're unaware of the intention, but I would like for you - as a princess - to show these particular guests about the Magic of Friendship. Your friends have a right to know about this as well, but you must advise them to be careful around the one called Rob Lucci; he needs your guidance the most." Twilight craned her head back with a quizzical glance "Rob Lucci?" Spike scratched his head "That's a funny name. I wonder what this Rob Lucci's like." Twilight rolled up the scroll with her magic and set it next to her book, which he closed after placing a bookmark "We'll find out once Discord arrives, which would no doubt be soon, since's both quick and unpredictable. In the meantime, we might as well go find our friends." Spike waddled towards the study's entrance with Twilight following after "Let's start with Sugarcube Corner. I'm in the mood for something sweet right now." Twilight smiled "Good idea. Some cupcakes sound good right now." She said as they walked out of the study and went down the stairs leading towards the library's main lobby. When they reached the front door to their home, Spike opened it up to show the vibrantly colored town outside with passing ponies. Twilight and Spike left the library after shutting the door and made their way towards Sugarcube Corner "You know, I'm already curious about our guests now." Twilight said as a faint sense of excitement built up in her heart "I can't believe Princess Celestia is giving me the opportunity to pass my lessons on frienship to somepony else. I think it'll be great to see our new students soon enough." Spike frowned at Twilight "Aren't you worried about them getting difficult, though? I mean, that Rob Lucci guy Celestia mentioned in the letter doesn't sound like the kind of pony you'd wanna meet if she wanted us to warn our friends first." Twilight took a deep breath "You're right, Spike. I should probably be more mindful about who I'm about to teach once they arrive." Her smile reappeared "Still, I cannot stop thinking about who Discord will arrive with. This could be an amazing experience!" A flash of light in front of Twilight and Spike's path cut off their conversation. It quickly vanished to reveal a grinning Discord with a group of otherworldly beings who were definitely not ponies at first glance. Like Discord, they stood on two legs, and while some were similar in body structure, they were all differently shaped. Not paying attention to the pony and dragon in front of him, Discord spread his arms "My friends, we've arrived. Welcome to Ponyville!" To be continued...