//------------------------------//
// Lesson Negative Zero 
// Story: Reaping Chaos 
// by Lost Handle 
//------------------------------//

“2010?” Twilight exclaimed. Pinkie looked at the receipt and shrugged. I assume she just didn't see the implication of the date. 2010. September twenty-fourth 2010. This struck into my mind as sixteen days before the My Little Pony debut. Why would Discord send us here? Because it was unexpected. I reasoned. We couldn't do him harm here... Be we could arm ourselves. I checked the clock and noticed it was now quite late.

I turned to the girls with my head bowed, “Look, we aren't harmed, we have time to think and thank-” I paused wanting to say Celestia but in front of these girls it would sound quite wrong, “heavens for that. Let's find us a place to sleep okay?” Twilight nodded, and Pinkie absentmindedly stared out the window toward the lights of a nearby city, cuddling her little plush alligator. I looked out that way to see signs for hotels. I pulled out of the lot and started moving. Then I laughed a bit.

Pinkie jumped to attention. “What's so funny?”

I smiled and elaborated, “I just realized, this is before the characters we made your personalities resemble appeared on television. Since you now exist before them, could we say that the characters were based on yourselves?”

Twilight chuckled while Pinkie stared a bit before cracking up too, finally understanding what I said. The mood was lightened. Soon Twilight was asking about all the places I passed. I tried my best, but explained to her that all of this was from a time when I was only thirteen. Because DISCORD had taken up fifteen years of my life, I only remembered a little bit of what I did before that. I explained the current events of the time. How you could see it in simply the small things here and there. One current event I noticed that I wish I had known about was a conference in the area. All hotels had a “No vacancy” sign in their doors. I sighed. This did not bode well.

I looked about the area and found a parking lot of a supermarket as they closed. I went in and gave a few questions to the manager. I came back to the car and jumped in, turning the car off. Pinkie looked at me quizzically, “And what was that for?”

I paid no attention to her and instead brought out my phone. I did a few quick swipes. I had something saved for a occasion such as this. I giggled to myself as I finally brought myself to say it. “We are having a little sleepover in my car! Here's your sleepover book.” I tossed my phone to Twilight who stared at it a minute.

Soon she and Pinkie burst out laughing with me at the convenient joke. But Twilight  soon stopped, “Wait we are sleeping WHERE?” She was soon creamed in the face by a pillow from Pinkie. I heard scientific laws begin crying as their worst enemy appeared earlier than they had hoped. I attacked Pinkie with a pillow too, and soon the hole car was a mess of  feathers and laughter. I felt the last shreds of manliness I had ooze away as I took one more swing with my destroyed pillow, and didn't give a dang. As we all collapsed on the seats, laughing, I noticed Twilight lifted the phone back into view. She gasped, “We did it out of order!” prompting me and Pinkie to laugh harder while Twilight found it a serious matter indeed. She scrolled back up, “We have to do makeovers first!”

I paused my laughter for a second, “Twilight. I don't know what you are seeing, but we are in a car at near midnight. Not to mention I am male.” I took a last laugh and placed my shredded pillow on my seat. “Don't you think 'have fun' could be checked off?” At that point I yawned and near immediately fell asleep. But I think the other two had a bit more awake time with each other.

I suppose waking up to two girls resting their heads next to yours isn't a BAD thing to wake to. But when you had been dreaming of a evil voice laughing over and over again waking up to anything out of the ordinary would be startling. Thus began a month of travel, embarrassments at restaurants, surprised awakenings, G-rated midnight shenanigans, and eventually madness. I mean having an all day trip is fun... for one day. But having to sleep on the sides of roads every night, search for directions every day, and eat at Mcdonald's every lunch kinda gets to your sanity. The only time we stayed at a hotel was on October tenth. The day before, me and Pinkie began typing up messages for forums claiming to be watchers of the new pony show coming on a new station. We elicited many a laughing comment, though I had to soon teach Pinkie that the people on the internet were simply jerks. I did the big post that I guess would be the crown jewel on /Co/ when Pinkie wasn't looking. Frankly, though she was a adult, I would have never forgiven myself if I let her even see any part of 4chan.

I guess we were taking advantage of the situation that day, but as we watched the pilots as we aired I couldn't help but laugh as the two predicted what their respective characters did. One thing struck me as odd though, Pinkie, in the show, turned when in the background and winked at the fourth wall. I had never noticed that before. But I could say I didn't care. I was watching two girls see the lives we created them on act out. We never let them watch the show for some reason. Though we explained certain things about it and plots. I couldn't figure out why at the time. On the other hoof, seeing the other four missing elements told me of what we set out to do. Hope somewhat died when I found out the year. Discord would never do something that dumb. Would he? I hoped so somewhat. The next day I saw my name mentioned in many forum threads as the seeds of bronies were planted. I showed it to Twilight, who had been unaware of our little fun, and she simply marveled at the humble beginnings of something that would change the world, and eventually destroy it.

A closeness formed in the month we were together. At the beginning it was two girls and I could guess I was a bit of an uncle to them. Teaching them about everything while not really controlling them. I became more lenient in the crazy antics and just waved my hand at the laughter. I was teaching less about the world and instead focusing more on them. They, from being together so long, had already formed a close bond. Though in the show Twilight seems to have the most problem with Pinkie, I guess Twi just needed to spend some time with her, like two years of time. I mean, it wasn't like Pinkie was ALWAYS rattling of weird ideas and words in a non-sequitur manner like she was shown in “The Last Roundup.” So the two were totally comfortable around each other and acted like sisters. A month wasn't long enough  to truly tell, but they soon started showing more of that comfort to me. Maybe as a brother, maybe as a close friend. But I guess staying in a car with someone for days on end kinda forces you to bond.

But back to madness, It became quite clear that “Lesson Zero” was more than a gag episode by the last week. It wasn't triggered by a friendship report, but instead a day where there were barely any cities to be seen or any other civilization. I guess I must have turned wrong a bit too often that day, but Twilight finally broke down. Telling me random directions, hopping into the front and adjusting the seats to give her more leg room, and playing with the knobs and levers up front for maximum comfort were only some of the things. Though she hadn't used her magic very much this entire trip, she suddenly began using it on the car to “Pretty” everything up for lack of stimulation. Needless to say, Pinkie and me silently agreed she needed a day off. So at 2 am, we finally found a city and a vacant hotel, we checked in while a very concerned Pinkie held Twilight in a magic lock we made as a failsafe. I was amazed at Pinkie. Though she was having a bit of fun with Twilight's antics, after a bit I guess that sister part of her relationship with Twilight took over in concern.

As we got up we laid her on the bed and began calming Twilight down. After a bit she was just curled in a ball and slowly drifted to sleep. We decided she just needed to be left alone for a bit, and we followed her in sleep. The next day Twilight was still a bit broken from the monotony, thus we decided to stay in for another day. But this time Pinkie and I had a few discussions over things that had been put off, but needed to be done. Though I can't say DISCORD paid poorly, I just couldn't afford living like this too much longer. Also, we smelled to high heavens. Though whenever we stayed at a hotel to watch the new My Little Pony episode we took the opportunity to shower/take a bath, our clothes were the same ones we had fled from DISCORD in. We had became accustomed to the smell, but restaurants began clearing out when we entered.

This time exposed a true caring side of Pinkie. I had only seen her this serious in “Hoisted by her own Leotard” A later episode in which Pinkie tries to help a now-grown Pumpkin Cake gain her confidence to preform in front of a crowd after bragging she could to everypony in her school. I compare it to that episode (One of the better ones in season 9 I might say) because Pumpkin becomes a nervous wreck like Dash in “Sonic Rainboom,” but Pinkie calmly comforts her. I think we put that ability to set aside her joking playfulness for a friend truly in need for a good reason. Even after we decided that we both had to go, she didn't want to leave Twilight's side, and all the way there I half expected her hair to deflate and her to begin talking to rocks. The only time she was able to take her mind off her friend was when I led her into the mall. I swear I have never seen wider eyes. She took my by the wrist and began zipping along the mall path. By the time we were done, we had five new pairs of clothes for each person, a little fortune telling necklace, and negative five-hundred dollars. We were running quite low on supplies by now. 

At this point I found that the “personality glitch” we had with Dash wasn't a glitch but a logical error for all of them when we were converting the pony's personalities to human ones. I think Applejack summed it up best in “The Best Night Ever” when she uttered the immortal line: “We don't normally wear clothes.” A little faux-pas that I suppose affected all the girls. Though we gave them clothing and wore it so they followed suit. But it resurged as I had to talk Pinkie out of changing in the middle of the mall, and the car, and the lobby. I didn't have the guts to explain WHY to Pinkie, and I suppose you would have the same issue. I slightly regretted lobbying for making at least Pinkie innocent. But I didn't expect to be LIVING with her. But as soon as I said no for the last time in the elevator she remembered Twilight. Hyperactivity crossed with the caring side and she grabbed me and zoomed straight into the room. 

Three Pinkies ministered to Twilight who I noticed as still being a bit shaken. The TV was on and I quickly realized why she wasn't better. She had it on the news. I turned it off and shook my head. “If you want to feel better mentally, turning on the news is not the brightest thing to do, Twi.”

Twilight mumbled a bit. I felt sorry. She was just having a rough time. But something was odd. I didn't quite recognize it. I placed the phone on the receiver and adjusted the bed that I and Pinkie slept in. Boy howdy, that sounded wrong. But the truth is what it is, I reasoned, and if anyone wants to construe it into anything other than what it is, I can't help it. That's how I felt really. It really only was the first of a few awkward mornings when I went over events in my head. In fact, my entire journey could be chalked up to be a bad boy and his chicks driving around looking for hot spots to spend the night.

I looked back over to Twilight and Pinkie and promptly turned away with my face a deeper shade of red. Better here the in the mall I guessed. Little moments like that also made me a bit worried about reputation to anyone who saw me. I quickly smacked myself upside the head. Stupid Luke, your reputation is in the future. You are a stranger to this time. It was October 24. Exactly a month from when I appeared. I lay down and opened my computer. At this time Twilight had calmed down a bit and conjured a glass of water. I looked at my screen, realizing that no site I went to was around back now. So instead I opened up a document I poured my experiences and thoughts into. These would become the basis of what I write now. I glanced over again and Pinkie was wearing her yellow t-shirt, wristbands, sandals, and pink pants (which now mysteriously bore her cutie mark) we had gotten. Her hair had gone into a more frizzy but slightly less poofy state. I didn't question it. As long as she wasn't talking to rocks I paid no attention to her mannerisms. I guess I should have, Pinkie Sense and all, but it wasn't on the forefront of my mind. I noticed the phone book was out, so I put it away thinking that Twilight just tried to read something but it had no substance. I resolved to drop by a book store some time soon. Maybe she would like a nice fantasy book or a science book. Meh, I'll just grab the first six things I recognize and hope she rereads them. I chuckled to myself.

I heard Pinkie and Twilight talking about something. Pinkie was mostly exclaiming and Twilight did the talking. I didn't pay much attention to it. I suspected it was girl talk as usual. I thought that about now people would begin the obvious degeneration into lusts for the show ponies. As I glanced over to a hidden tab my simple suspect of human nature was confirmed. I couldn't help but feel a bit proud in this instance. They were wishing they could, ahem, cuddle for example Applejack or Pinkie. I personally witnessed that doing any more than cuddling to Applejack would result in a shattered leg, if only that. And as for Pinkie, well, it was all I could do to keep from posting that  had spent the night with her. Quickly I slammed the computer down. What the hay had I just thought? Twilight looked at me, a bit puzzled. I grabbed a pillow and shoved it over my head. That thought was uncalled for and disgusted me. The internet rubs off on you, I guess. So after a bit of clutching the pillow Twilight asked what was wrong. I lied that nothing was. This pillow smells like cotton candy. I cursed my male mind. No, there was something very wrong with me. I was human. After a couple more minutes I came out of my pillow and re-opened my computer for the purpose of closing that window. I didn't need any thoughts crossing my mind. Not like a couple those idiots that worked with me on Applejack.

Silence followed until Twilight piped up, “Hey, there's something I think you might want to know.” I noticed that her clothes had changed by now. Pinkie was tossing the old set into a pile. I quickly clamped shut my mind as to not permit anything else to enter it.

“What's up, Twi?” I asked. I noticed this was the second time I had called her 'Twi' recently. Without letting anything else enter my head, I noted that I must be feeling more comfortable near them as well.

“It's just that... well I heard something on the news-”

“The news is a fountain of the bad. You just have to remember that good stuff is going on in the world.”

“Oh no, it's good news... well I fo-” A knock on the door was heard and Pinkie called she would greet whoever it was with a little cake she was carrying. Where she got that cake is a mystery. I was about to ask Twilight to continue when I heard the plate drop.

A rough, tomboyish voice called out, “Save the welcoming party. Great to see ya guys but we need to go get AJ.”