Silence reigns as we settle around a campfire, awaiting Luna’s return. The fire does little to warm our spirits - one could blame the humid air, drifting in from the nearby swamp, or the lack of dry kindling, or the setting sun, lengthening the shadows all around us, or any number of environmental variables. But the chill that pervades has little to do with the actual temperature.
We’re seated in a loose circle, on top of every dry sheet and cushion we had to stave off the elements. Little thought was given to who sat where. But as fate would have it, I just so happened to end up opposite Rainbow Dash.
Even now, her eyes continue to glare at me, through the fire and smoke, trying to bore a hole into my skull with sheer willpower alone. I deign to lock eyes with her occasionally, but her gaze has an intensity of its own, firelight notwithstanding, and I can’t keep up.
Fluttershy had managed to keep Rainbow Dash calm up to this point, but she and Pinkie were asleep now, recovering from their own wounds. All said, I wouldn’t actually fault Rainbow if she decided to leap through the fire and throttle me right now.
Well, damn the consequences then. I clear my throat, breaking the uncomfortable silence for the first time in what felt like an eternity. “For what it’s worth,” I say to Rainbow, “I’m sorry.”
A fleeting look of surprise crosses Rainbow’s face, but it vanishes as quickly as it came, giving way to the same anger. Applejack and Rarity, seated on either side of me, decline to comment, looking between us warily.
“I should have said that in the library from the very beginning,” I admit. “I should have said a lot of things.”
Rainbow sighs and breaks her gaze for a brief moment to roll her eyes. “Well, I didn’t exactly give you much of a chance to say anything, did I?”
Applejack lifts an eyebrow. “Is that an apology, Rainbow Dash?” she asks in a poorly veiled effort to lighten the mood. Pinkie’s checked out for the night, so the effort doesn’t go unappreciated.
Rainbow Dash’s silence, however, quickly puts a stop to that.
“If you’re on the fence, darling,” Rarity cuts in, “then perhaps it’s time now that we clear the air.” She turns to face me, no trace of lightness in her features. “Last night, in the clearing… we had every intention of killing you.”
The words are like a punch to the stomach. Even Rainbow Dash and Applejack seem stunned by the admission. “Yeah,” Applejack adds solemnly, “she’s right. The three of us, we decided that on the way to Canterlot.”
It takes me a moment to recover. “I… had expected that,” I finally say. “For all you knew, I was just some changeling that crept up in the middle of the night to kidnap Twilight out of her bed…”
“That’s not how it went?” Rainbow Dash asks. “Well, how did it go then?”
“What exactly are you, anyway?” Applejack finishes.
No turning back now, it seems. I take in a deep breath, trying to relieve the building buzzing tension in my brain before it threatens to take over. “I’m not Twilight,” I start, “but for quite awhile, I thought I was. I didn’t know until that day… in the library.” It seemed so long ago now - had it really been only two days ago?
Rainbow Dash, it seems, shares my disbelief. “How exactly does that work?” she asks.
“It was a spell,” I start, “an extremely complex and hard-to-cast enchantment that turns something into a perfect duplicate of something else.”
“Or… somepony?” Rarity adds.
I nod and continue. “Chrysalis captured me-” I catch myself, swearing under my breath. “Chrysalis captured Twilight and turned me into a copy of her, down to her memories.”
Rarity’s brow furrows. “So… then you aren’t a changeling after all, are you?”
I shrug my shoulders. “The spell was never meant to be used on ponies. Obviously, something was left behind… I don’t know if that means the spell failed or if it was incomplete…”
Applejack gapes. “Hold on. Then that means… all that destiny stuff from earlier…” Her eyes grow wide. “Dusk… did you…” My solemn nod confirms her fears, and she resolves to sit back, gazing numbly into the sky.
Rainbow Dash cuts us all off before we can say anything else. “Rarity, Applejack… you’re missing the most important point.” She turns to me, her gaze sharp enough to cut diamond. “We only ever met Chrysalis once… and that was months ago. At the wedding.”
Rarity and Applejack share a look of abject horror. My throat runs dry.
“How long have you been here?”
A rustle of branches startles us before I can answer. Rarity and I light our horns in unison, preparing for the worst, but when Luna emerges from the brush, our tension vanishes. I look to her, relief and gratitude etched on my face.
The expression Luna returns seems strange, however, and she quickly turns her gaze to look at the group as a whole. “You are all unharmed?” she asks.
“More or less,” I answer, conveniently leaving out the events of the last hour. “The changelings?”
Luna smiles. “Gone.”
Rarity gapes. “There were at least twenty or thirty in that group that chased us down-”
“No,” Luna corrects, “I went after all of the changelings in the valley.” Her expression turns downright bloodthirsty. “They won’t be coming after us.”
Stars appear in Rainbow Dash’s eyes at the show of badflankery, and Applejack lets out a low whistle. Rarity, however, has a different opinion. “I don’t mean to offend, Luna,” she starts, “but won’t the sudden death and disappearance of an entire swarm of changelings draw some attention in and of itself?”
Luna’s eyes widen, and she curses herself under her breath. “Foalish and more foalish… I allowed myself to get carried away.” She begins to pace in a tight circle. “Although… without any substantial force in the area, we may still have the element of surprise…”
“It doesn’t matter,” I say. “She already knows we’re coming.”
Luna stops in her tracks, and four sets of eyes fix on me in shock and alarm. I immediately regret my outburst.
Luna is the first to reply. “Wh- what do you mean she knows we’re here?”
I sigh. What was I saying earlier? Damn the consequences? “Chrysalis has put out a standing order, recalling all of her changelings to the hive.” As the others sit in silence, either unable or unwilling to put the pieces together, I continue. “She’s in my head. I can hear her. That’s how I know where the hive is… and that’s how she knows where we are.”
“Then… the buzzing… at my boutique, and in the library… that was…” Rarity thinks aloud.
Applejack drives a hoof into the earth, sending up bits of overturned dirt and shifting the fuel in the campfire, causing it to flare up anew. Luna simply stares, as if trying to process the new information.
Before I can say anything else, I am assaulted with a sharp blow to the face.
I don’t even have time to put up a shield before Rainbow Dash is suddenly upon me, a blur of punches and kicks. Every strike feels like a sledgehammer to my heart as her passion and energy is directed into my utter destruction.
Rarity and AJ leap into action, trying to pull the enraged pegasus away from me. Luna’s yells of protest reach Royal Canterlot Voice levels. But in the end, only one thing could have possibly gone through to her.
“You promised…”
The quiet voice cuts through the din. Everypony turns, and I crane my head up to where Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy are sitting up, staring at Rainbow Dash with identical looks of betrayal and disappointment.
Rainbow Dash’s assault stops just long enough for me to get away. I crawl out from underneath the pegasus and struggle to my hooves - and then I keep going. I run away… away from the voices in camp, away from the buzzing beacon of the hive, as far as I can go before the crushing despair finally has a chance to catch up with me.
The light touch of a wing awakens me from my slumber. I pull my limbs closer to myself instinctively and crack an eye open, only to see midnight blue feathers and an ethereal, waving mane full of stars. “Luna?” I ask wearily.
“You are awake. Good.” Luna retracts her wing, folding it back against her side.
I lean my neck into the larger alicorn’s body, eyes closing again in an effort to stop the fresh onset of tears. I feel Luna’s body tense up for a moment before she relaxes, allowing me to press into her surprisingly lean barrel.
Luna clears her throat. “Sister did well with the sky tonight,” she says, trying to break the ice.
“It’s nothing compared to yours,” I say into her coat.
It’s not a lie; I’ve been interested in the stars almost as long as I’ve been practicing magic - a remnant of Celestia’s unique brand of education, perhaps. I knew the positions of every constellation and star system almost by heart, and studied the skies with fascination night after night. But what Celestia did by rote, Luna did with artistic grace. The first night of Luna’s return, I couldn’t help but gape - it was like looking at the sky for the first time.
“I’m sure she would like to hear that,” Luna replies. “It would be… interesting, to say the least.”
My brow furrows. If memory serves, I actually did tell her that on one occasion. It was less a slight on Celestia’s part and more of a compliment for Luna, but the sentiment was sincere.
Come to think of it, wasn’t she there for that?
I shudder, unwilling and unable to trust my memories… not when they weren’t even mine. Here, pressed against the body of my friend, I don’t want to do anything except ache.
Luna seems to sense my discomfort. “Twilight Sparkle once wrote me a letter.”
I remember, I want to say. “I know,” I say instead. “It was after the Want It Need It incident.”
“Do you remember my reply, then?” she asks, looking down at my face as I look up into her eyes.
“You said… you said that you owe me your life… and that if I ever asked you for anything, that you would do everything in your power to-”
Luna smirks, putting a hoof over my lips. “I’d like to extend that offer to you as well, Dusk.”
I gasp as a chilling sensation shoots through my spine. There was no mistaking the feeling that I was getting from Luna at this moment. My base instincts take over as I feel Luna’s love nourish my body and soul. For several, agonizing minutes, I simply allow it to happen - but then my rational brain returns. “Why are you doing this?”
“This is not what you desire?” Luna looks at me strangely. “Hmm. Forgive my boldness, then. What is it that you need?”
Luna’s question, though not quite out of left field, still leaves me speechless. I want a lot of things. I want to make my friends happy again, save Twilight Sparkle, and blow Queen Chrysalis to smithereens for what she’s done to us. At the same time, I also want to just give up, go home, and pretend nothing happened. And Luna’s little… display… wasn’t bad either. I could go for that again.
But there is only one thing that I know I need. I think on it for some time, carefully composing my response before giving it in clear tones. “What I need… is to be me.” Luna’s brow furrows. “I need identity.”
“But… changelings do not have-” Luna starts, but I stop her.
“Chrysalis went and screwed that up, though. I’m not a changeling anymore. But I’m not exactly a pony either. I have no idea who or what I am… and this little crisis of identity I’m having by sharing Twilight Sparkle’s memories and shape isn’t helping.”
“What are you saying?” Luna asks.
“Luna, I want you to place a geas on me,” I answer confidently.
“…That is powerful magic,” says the Princess of the Night. “To what end will a geas help?”
“I wish…” I take in a breath. “I wish to forget the memories of Twilight Sparkle.”
Luna breaks eye contact to stare at the ground. “It appears… that you have managed to select the one boon that I am loath to give.”
My heart sinks. “I… I thought you’d say something like that.”
Luna sighs. “Everypony has memories that they would rather forget. I myself might have learned that lesson a little more harshly than most.” Her eyes glaze over for a moment, thinking on days past, before she returns to herself. “But memories are important. They define who you are. To merely discard that away…”
“But they’re not my memories!” I yell before clapping a hoof over my mouth. Luna is taken aback, but nods, allowing me to continue. “I’m sorry… but how can I possibly be myself when my entire being was built on somepony else’s foundation?”
“I will not argue upon the similarities, but I believe that you are a creature all your own,” Luna insists, and I immediately think of Pinkie Pie - You’re a different pony after all, aren’t you?
Tears begin to stream down my face. “If I am so different, then why does it hurt every time I look at them? Why do I feel like I’m lying to them, all of them, simply by existing?” I stomp a hoof. “I need to know who I am. You have to help me.”
Luna’s uncertainty is aggravating. “I-”
“Please,” I insist, staring deeply into Luna’s eyes. For a brief moment, I can taste the undercurrents of love once again before she breathes a sigh of resignation.
“There is a way,” Luna admits. “This is dream magic of the highest order. It is rare for me to cast this spell, and rarer still that it is used for this purpose, but I will do you this favor.” She stops me before I can express my gratitude. “However, in order to do so, you must entrust yourself to me.”
My wings flap involuntarily. “Of course-”
“Your entire self,” Luna warns. “You must subsume your will to mine, allow me direct and full control.”
I bite my lip. “…Yes, Luna. I will.”
Luna smiles darkly. Her horn begins to shimmer its usual cerulean blue as her magic begins to creep over me like a wave. “Then listen, Dusk. Listen to the sound of my voice.”
I stare deeply into Luna’s eyes, feeling her magic diffuse through my entire body. Your eyelids grow heavy, Luna says, and I am shocked for a moment how quickly Luna has entered my mind. Further still, I can’t help but watch as my eyes begin to droop.
For the briefest moment, as my eyes close for good, I see a flash of green.
Good. Sink deeper, and deeper, and deeper still. Let the magic flow through you. As it does, feel yourself drift further and further…
I know this sensation. This isn’t Luna’s dream spell.
The magic fills you up. Your ability to resist falls away. Your body is no longer your own. Your mind is no longer your own.
This is-
SLEEP.
Who is it that you love?
Images flit across my subconscious, and somewhere, far away from here, my body mouths the names as they appear.
Pinkie Pie leaps into the air, gasping for breath at the sight of Ponyville’s newest resident as Applejack uses her powerful muscles to shake a tree free of its delicious fruit. Rainbow Dash’s familiar contrail sets itself on a collision course for me. Rarity… pouncing upon me at once, insisting on fixing my mane, and Fluttershy, quietly watching me through her curtain of pink, trying to figure out if I posed a threat…
All of them are in such stark contrast to me, and in any other situation it would be hard-pressed to find anything to connect us. But when the time came, I gladly called them friends - and with their friendship came a power that could overcome the greatest of obstacles.
Their forms shimmer before me, giving way to others still.
My parents, encouraging me to pursue my dreams… Shining Armor, my brother, swearing to protect me from the day I was born… Cadance, trying as hard as she could to show me what love and friendship truly meant… Spike, my surrogate brother, whom I have raised from infancy, and who, in turn, has helped to raise me…
My family.
They join my friends and stand, ghosts of themselves, smiling and waving at me, beckoning me forward.
All at once, their smiles disappear. Their bodies burn away in wisps of green flame.
I yell, wanting to cry out to them. But you do not. They are not yours. You do not love them, nor do they love you.
...Of course. Of course, Luna, you’re right. Why would I-
Who is it that you love?
Two beautiful creatures emerge, bursting forth from the void in flashes of gold and cerulean blue. Faced with their full majesty, I prostrate myself - until a familiar golden-shod hoof extends to me. I look up at the smiling face of my dear mentor, she who lifted me from the depths, allowing me to find myself and face my destiny. Others see her as an untouchable goddess - but I have had the blessed privilege of seeing her equine side - curious, fun-loving, unabashedly kind… and it has only elevated her more in my mind. I take Princess Celestia’s hoof in mine and she lifts me off of the floor.
Next to her, I see the younger of the Sisters, awkward in her body like she was the first day I met her. But before my eyes, her body increases in size, her mane takes on the look of the stars themselves, and her awkward posturing is replaced by confidence and the air of royalty. But beneath, I find a mare similar to myself, unsure how to progress in a world different than everything she knew. I look upon Luna, and she gives me one of her signature mysterious smiles.
The pair of alicorns circle me, drawing closer and closer.
“I… I love…” I begin. But it’s then that a very familiar buzzing makes its presence known. It lingers, just at the edge of my senses.
The alicorns approach me together, still possessed of their same beatific smiles. They walk along two lines that threaten to converge right in front of me. I gasp, knowing what is about to happen. I lift a hoof, trying to escape…
But you do not wish to.
Of course I don’t. Why would I disobey you, Luna?
The beings merge together, colors and shapes and green flame swirling about in my mind… until one figure emerges, staring at me with her own green, slitted eyes
“I love you…” I say. “I love you… Chrysalis.”
Good. Now… wake up.
Yes, Queen.
You arrive at camp just before sunrise. “Hello, everypony,” you say, just as I have instructed. The others look to you with mixed expressions of remorse and relief. None of them have the intellect required to pierce through my expertly crafted ruse…
The pink one’s ear twitches in some odd, unexpected way. Could she have discovered us? Ah, well, there is no need to worry. Your sister shall be along.
My… sister… no… this can’t be…
“Girls,” Pinkie Pie says, “Something’s wrong. We need to-”
At once, one of my faithful drones emerges from the canopy above, descending upon her and pinning her to the floor.
Pinkie Pie… girls… you have to… Do not speak.
My drones appear on all sides. The one called Rarity tries to summon up her magic power and use that trifling telekinesis of hers. But one of my drones excretes its special sputum, the type designed to nullify unicorn magic, and she is quickly subdued.
Rarity, it’s not nullified, it’s dispersed. If you can- You will say nothing.
Applejack lets out a mighty roar, evidence of her own immense strength. But, like Luna before her, she falls under the weight of overwhelming numbers. Her groans fade away to nothing as the others watch helplessly.
Rainbow Dash proves to be a problem, evading my minions with incredible speed. But the Element of Loyalty has one glaring weakness, and I exploit it fully. Three drones overcome the yellow pegasus, Fluttershy, and on my command, a horn is lit and pressed down her open muzzle. Rainbow Dash gives up instantly, her muscles slackening, and a band of drones is quick to capture her, pinning her wings to her sides with more squirts of binding fluid.
“I knew it,” Rainbow Dash spits. “I knew you were no good…”
“Dusk…” says Rarity, stunned, “How could you-”
“That’s not Dusk,” Pinkie interrupts, “Or, at least… it’s not…”
Time for me to make my entrance, it seems. I arrive in the campsite, wearing the guise of the Lunar Princess, as I had the night prior. I don’t expect to fool anypony, not anymore… but surely one can be forgiven the chance to show off a bit, hm?
You step aside to let me through. The Element Bearers have been brought to me in a rough semicircle, placed prone on the floor, their eyes only able to peer up at me after a great deal of effort.
“What did you do to Luna?” Applejack says immediately - leave it to Honesty to discern the truth first, I suppose. With little effort, I abandon the disguise, relishing the renewed fear behind their defiant expressions.
You may cast the spell now.
N-no I
Now now. There’s no time for this nonsense. Front right, back left legs forward. Front left, back right legs forward. Step. Step. Face forward. Your vision is blurred with tears, but you hardly need it right now.
Stream, open. Horn, lit. Spell at the ready.
“Dusk…” Fluttershy manages through the horn in her throat, “You have to… you have to fight-”
Cast the spell. I- My- “G-girls… I’m-”
Cast the spell.
“I’m… s-sorr-”
A wave of green energy manifests itself as searing flame that circles each of them before pulling them straight down through the floor. Their panicked screams are the last thing to reach your ears.
Your friends are gone. Luna is gone. There is nopony left.
The last of your will ebbs to nothing, and you fall away, embracing the swarm.
Your mission is complete. Return home.