Equestria: A History Revealed

by Hoofry_Poneigher


Chapter 6: The First Draconequus – The Origins of Discord

When discussing the Discordian Era, a mistake that many traditionalist historians make is how they overstate the chaos that Discord himself had wruck upon the ponies. While it is true that he was a god of chaos, as usual, these scholars have a tendency to overexaggerate many of these “elements of Discord”. While many factual accounts have confirmed his power during his second coming in the year 2011, the public understanding of that event is already inherently flawed (as I will explain once I discuss it in a later chapter), and therefore is not admissible as evidence for the actions of Discord in this time period. I will not, however, take the stance of other revisionist historians, who downplay Discord’s importance in bringing an end to the era in favor of the Republic’s weaknesses, as I had stated before. Rather, I will take a middle ground by stating that while Discord was indeed a primary factor in the fall of the Equinus Republic, he caused its downfall in an extremely unorthodox way; far different than one is commonly accepted in history.

Before discussing the actions of Discord, we must go into his origins; a past that is still not commonly understood and debated to this date. Even after rehabilitation by one of the supposed element holders and former sex-symbol, Fluttershy, in 2013, his past was never expanded upon or revealed, and his sudden appearance in history remains a mystery. No pony truly knew where came from except for Discord himself, and like many other significant figures in history, is still left unknown. Until now of course.

Before the creation of this crowning stroke of genius, my masterfully written jewel in the eye of history, pony historians were left grasping at straws to find the truth behind Discord’s origins. Lucky Foot, self-proclaimed historian specializing in the Discord Era, pretentiously wrote,

“Ignoring his raw magical ability, [Discord’s] very appearance did not conform to the laws of the natural world. The very nature of Discord and his power could not be explained through traditional thought alone, and it seemed that not only did his appearance seem to object to the order of nature, but reality itself twisted to his magical beck and call. In this sense, perhaps it would be wrong to try to discern Discord’s origins through logic as well.”[25]

This, of course, did not stop me, nor a significant majority of scholars, from continuing to speculate Discord’s past. Some had theorized that Discord may have been a product of a forbidden relationship between a dragon and a higher level unicorn, creating a result that was so far removed from the natural world that it had descended into chaos. If this was the case, it certainly would explain his raw magical ability; however, no relationship of this sort had ever been recorded or referenced in history. Also, I’d like to add that in my personal experience, future attempts at coaxing dragons into cross-species mating usually procured a poor end result. Therefore, due to a lack of conclusive evidence, such a claim is forced to remain as little more than an assumption.

So how did Discord really come to existence? How was the first and only documented draconequus created? A problem with the dragon-pony hypothesis is that it is does not explain the mismatch of animal appendages that Discord possesses. In light of this, I will present the one and only reasonable possibility.

Ponies have long since debated on the unnatural nature of Discord, stating that such a creature was “out of this world”. My theory takes this idea to the extreme. Perhaps Discord truly was a creature not of this planet. But do not assume that I am stating that Discord himself was an alien; that would be absurd. Rather, the point that I’m trying to make is that he was a product created by illegal aliens. And I’m not talking about those freeloading griffons who I get to clean my apartment every Saturday; I’m referring to real life extraterrestrials. It would explain everything. For example, his remarkable powers that could neither be explained through rhyme or reason can be handwaved off as the work of aliens.

He may have even been an experiment in some alien inter-species gene splicing project, which would explain his unique body structure. But the possibility that I find most likely, was that he was the end result of a horrific alien space orgy. And I mean just all out nastiness. After all, aliens are known for their uncontrollable libidos (at least in my mind). By kidnapping members of other species across our planet, they would be able to test things such as carnal prowess, vitality, girth, as well as answering the age old question of “how much a wood a woodchuck really could chuck”. And the horrific space love child birthed out of whatever mess those creatures call genitals? Discord.

Now that age-old historical dilemma is out of the way, we can get into the real meat of the conspiracy. Yes, it may surprise you, but alien space orgies are not the biggest conspiracy behind the rise of Discord. The real conspiracy reveals itself when discussing how exactly the proud Equinus Republic had fell.