CHAPTER 11: DOGFIGHT OVER PONYVILLE
MY DREAM
SKYS ABOVE
PONYVILLE, EQUESTRIA
Now I should explain the switching between Equestria and Canada better shouldn't I? The way it works is when I go to sleep my conscience switches bodies or something like that, (I wasn't listening to Twi when she was explaining) then I'm actually asleep in that body for about an hour before I wake up. Therefore I can still dream, and that night in the hospital, I had one hell of a dream...
I opened my eyes and spotted some green thing in front of me. I blinked a few times and it came into focus. It was a CF-18 heads up display.
Wha? Why am I in a fighter jet? In my human body?
I looked around me and saw I was at the head of a formation of twelve CF-18s.
"Blackout leader, we have fifty-plus bandits coming over the coast approximately two hundred kilometres east of Ponyville angels thirty-five."
And why are we using World War two radio discipline? Well, I guess I'm the leader so thats me. Hmmm, Blackout? Oh yes, the controller is Kenway. Lets see if all that simulator time payed off.
"Roger Kenway. Blackout vector seventy degrees to port."
Good thing I know about WWII radio callsigns.
I took inventory and saw that my plane was equipped with nine sidewinder heatseeking missiles and the standard M61A1 Vulcan gatling. Right then I saw my radar had picked up a large formation of aircraft a hundred kilometres off my nose.
"Alright Blackout. Lock in, here we go! Blue and Yellow sections break on my go, Reds stay with me." I ordered as my section leaders acknowledged.
I took the squadron up sun of the enemy formation who didn't appear to have any radar. We got into position and saw it was a mixed formation of about forty Su-34 'Fullback' strike aircraft and ten Su-35 'Flanker' fighters for escort.
Just before we were going to attack my earphones came alive with missile warnings. I looked behind me to see another thirty 'Flankers' diving on us, along with several missiles.
"Shit! Break! Break! Break! Red go after the strike bombers! Blue and Yellow kill those fighters!" I yelled in my headset as I rolled over and dumped flares before kicking in full afterburner.
'BOOM!'
"Blue four is down!"
The four planes of my section broke with Red Two sticking to me while Red Four stuck with Three as we plunged into the bombers. I lined up a 'Fullback' in my sights and fired a quick burst into it's right wing root blowing off the wing before rolling right and ("Fox two!") blasting another with an AIM-9 do. Then a few 'thirty-mil' rounds went cracking past just above the cockpit canopy.
FUCK!!
I jerked the stick right before pulling hard and almost blacking out. I looked over my shoulder before reversing and cueing my radio.
"Red Two! Where are you!?"
"On his six boss! He's following you closely so its hard to get a shot off!" Came a slightly panicked voice.
"Well maybe this will help." I muttered to myself as I cut the engine and eased back on the stick causing my jet to bring the nose up and 'skid' with the nose at about thirty degrees off level through the air.
I watched as the 'Flanker' whizzed past before kicking in my afterburners and acquiring a tone on the enemy.
'Beep-Beep-Beep-Bee-BEEEEEEEEEP'
"Fox two!" I said as my Sidewinder streaked straight and true right down his tailpipe before detonating and reducing the fighter to scrap metal.
The next two minutes became a blur as fighter jets criss-crossed the sky in contrails.
"Blue Three is down! Blue Three is down!" Dammnit!
"Fox two!"
"Yellow three, get him offa me!"
"Scratch two 'Flankers'!"
"Fuck! I'm Ejecting!"
"Red four's Ejected!"
"Blackout leader, be advised, you have Hunter squadron joining the fray in their F-16s."
"Roger Kenway!"
"Red one! I could use you help right about now!" Came the call from the now wingmanless Red three as he streaked out of a cloud a couple miles ahead with a Flanker firmly planted on his six.
"Two, take it!" I told my wingman.
"Roger..........Fox two!" He said sending a missile streaking towards the offending jet.
'BOOM!'
"Splash one Flanker!" Two exclaimed as I turned back towards the fur ball of jets.
"Hunter lead to Blackout."
"Go ahead Hunter!" I said through clenched teeth as I pulled another hard turn while dumping flares to avoid another missile.
"Do you want to take the 'Thirty-fours' or 'fives'?"
"We got the Flankers Hunter! Kill those Fullbacks!"
"Roger!"
"Red one break right!" Came the call from my wingman. I instantly jammed the stick right and pulled back, entering a hard right-hand turn.
"He followed me Boss! A little help please?"
I rolled my jet back and looked for Two. I spotted him heading perpendicular to me off to the left with a 'Thirty-five' on his tail. I began to roll towards the pair when I glimpsed a red stripe on the edge of the enemy pilots cockpit. That was just before the jet launched a heat seeker. Two rolled and dumped flares but the missile slammed into the jet just in front of the engines resulting in a huge fireball.
YOU FUCKING SONOFABITCH!
I flew at him head-on at full afterburner, pulling the trigger and launching a missile. He dodged left causing it to miss before I rolled and leached on to his tail. He began trying to shake me by doing Immelmann's and rolls of all sorts before he did something only a Su-35 can do: Pugachev's Cobra. The jet's nose came way up past ninety degrees while continuing flying straight causing it to dump all of its speed and end up behind me.
Shit!
I quickly put my stick over until I was upside down before pulling back and entering a power dive.
Thats when something exploded and my jet supposedly became a fireball.
Holy Shit!
But I wouldn't know, as I woke up in my cloud house just outside Ponyville.
"Whahhhh! O-ok...C-calm down Rainbow...Just a dream!" I reassured myself.
I made my way downstairs and got a bowl of cereal and began to eat.
'Thump-Thump-Thump' Who would be here at nine in the morning?
I hovered over to the door and opened it revealing a certain yellow pegasus.
"H-hello Rainbow."
"Hey Fluttershy."
"Ummm, Twilight would like us all at the library, if...thats not too much...to ask."
"Nah, it's cool Flutters. Tell Twi I'll be there in thirty." I said before shutting the door.
I feel like shit. I thought as I made my way to my bathroom. Looking at my reflection, another thought popped into my head: I look like shit.
***************************************************
I arrived at the library to see all five of my friends were already there.
"Well girls, now that Rainbow's here we can begin." Stated Twilight.
"And what would that be darling?" asked Rarity.
"After what has happened with us having our human bodies switched for our pony bodies, I did a survey to find out if anyone else in Ponyville has gone through the same thing. Turns out, everyone the age of sixty or below has gone through the same thing."
"Really!?" Squealed Pinkie.
"But thats not all, I found that about fifty percent of the ponies had the opposite sex than the ones they were as humans. And all of them were from the South Greater Vancouver area. Therefore it seems that this area is the Ponyville equivalent, while Canterlot's equivalent appears to be Downtown Vancouver from the five or so Canterlonians that I've asked."