Stability

by Schiere


A Walk in the Park

I’ve always dreaded change but she was a special case. I always thought of her as a special pony. Even before the incident, she was special. We were friends then, us and Roseluck. We were all content with how things were, that stasis in our lives, the one constant thing we could always count on that would never change. Ever. But, perhaps, it was time things changed. And maybe it was for the better. She’s changed but… she’s special. To me. And that is something that not even Faust above could take away from me.
~Doctor Stable, Neurologist

There was a sweet smell of dew in the air. The park grass glistened iridescent against the pale moonlight amidst the shivering winds. The grass stretched along the cobblestones so tight that they seeped into the cracks between. The Mayor had half a mind to have them trimmed but Loose was thankful she decided to keep it that way. “Has a natural charm to it.”

Screw Loose jaunted merrily along the cobblestone road. She was barehoofed, feeling the grass and smooth stonework road that arched around the lake. She didn’t really like the lake, she didn’t know why.

She eyed the benches that lined it with a sudden familiarity. Something about them beckoned her for a moment. Strange how such an inanimate thing could be so alluring. She shook her head, ignoring it, then left the lake without a second glance.

Her eyes traced the shadows against the thin forestry. This was a beautiful place in the park. Light, day or night, would seep through the apertures between the trees above. Even now it was a breathtaking place.

She was mystified by it, the moonlight rays that peeked timidly along the road and throughout the miniature woods.

Again, she felt that sudden surge of familiarity. Her mind almost went blank, trying to draw the scene that came so close to mind.

With a silent grunt, she hastened. She didn’t really want to think about it. Hurts to think sometimes.

She found herself in an opening. There was a playground in the distance with a lonely swing swaying lightly in the wind. A tall hill banked against the road and ebbed closely to the forest. On the other side of the road was a field of grass with signs of a soccer field faintly etched along the grass.

Off on one side of the soccer field were green bleachers. They looked unfamiliar… and inviting. With a relieved sigh, she took a seat.

She sat there with a solemn look in her eyes, thoughts drifting into the past few weeks.

“Umm... evening, Loose.” Roseluck poked her head out of the corner of her eye, waiving timidly at her.

“Evening.” She smiled pleasantly.

She liked her. Roseluck sold some of the most beautiful flowers in Ponyville. Cared for and bred right on her own backyard, or so her tags would say. Doctor Stable would give her a bouquet every year on Hearts and Hooves Day or whenever he felt like it. She had gotten so many that reading the tag just came up when there was nothing else to do rather than eat them or take in the scent.

There was even that air of familiarity with her. She was a good-familiar, not like everything else that her grunting with duress-filled steps and shunning her thoughts that now seemed so precious in her madness.

Roseluck took the seat beside her, giving her a genuine smile. “What are you doing out here so late?”

“Stable told me that I should try getting fresh air every once in a while. I don't like everypony staring at me every time I leave the house so I take my walks at night.”

She looked at her a little incredulously, then laughed. “Do you always refer to him so informally?”

“Yeah.” She laughed with her. “I never got used to calling him ‘doctor’. It just never sat well with me.”

“Oh, I had no idea you were friends beforehoof,” Roseluck said.

“For a while, neither did I.” She smiled at the memory. It was faint but what she remembered was all pleasant. She nearly gripped her own dress in the encroaching excitement. She could feel it surge through her spine, making her shiver and giggle.

Roseluck couldn’t help but share in her laughter.

Minutes passed in pleasant silence as they sat there, watching the stars together.

Roseluck looked away, letting her thoughts drift elsewhere. She wanted to ask for herself, ask for advice on her own life but she wasn’t sure Loose even remembered her. They were probably strangers to her, history lost in the haze that was now her mind.

Loose had half a mind to break the silence but Rose broke it for her.

“So everything's come back to you now?” she asked hopefully.

“Not really, things are still really foggy. All I really recall was a lot of pain, fire, a lot of timber, and kissing.”

“Kissing him?” She forgot to be disappointed.

“Yes, kissing him.

A part of her didn’t want to push any further but she couldn’t sate her curiosity. Who knows, maybe she’d be open about it. “How does that make you feel?”

Loose hesitated, pressing a thoughtful hoof to her lip. “I'm... not sure. I often find myself questioning what I do around him. Since I found out that I kissed him for Celestia-knows-why I keep trying to impress him, make him proud of me and what I do.”

Rose’s heart sang, she was happy she’d found him again.

“It's strange, isn't it?” Loose continued, “Falling in love with somepony and you don't even know why? Better yet, you don't even care that you don't know the reason. You just do and that, suddenly, is all that matters.”

“I don't think that's strange at all.” Loose found comfort in that.

Rose scooted closer. “Do you think he feels the same way?”

“No,” she replied plainly.

She scrunched her brow, mildly fuming inside. She took her shoulder and her hoof in hers, urging their eyes to meet and they did. “You shouldn't be doubting yourself, you could at least try asking him.”

Loose chuckled. She shook her head then gave her a half-lidded gaze and soft smile. “You misunderstand. I asked, he said ‘no’.”

“He did? Why?” Rose asked with a hint of sadness in her voice.

“Something about doctors and falling for their patients.”

“Oh, I’m sorry…” Rose still didn’t get why she seemed to content.

“Don't be, he loves me back.” Loose thought her shock was priceless.

“But I thought you said he-“

“He said he didn't, doesn't mean he wasn't lying.”

“How can you tell?”

“I kissed him after he said ‘no’.” She giggled. “He kissed me back.”

“But he isn't admitting it?” Rose made a mental note to knock some sense into the good doctor.

Loose gave her that famous, brimming smile that set her at ease. “That shouldn't stop me. If I try hard enough, I'm sure he'll be back to his old self.”

“You sound really sure of yourself.”

“If without hope, the journey to discovery becomes an empty venture.” Loose wanted to go with the sagely tone but settle with her own. She laughed lightly, remembering where she got that from. “He used to say things like that. He was in love with philosophy at the time.”

Rose nodded. He always did quote the most astounding things. Sometimes it felt like he was just trying to sound smart. He was, of course, but since the incident with Loose, he had started doubting himself. Only recently had he gotten his confidence back.

Silence panned out again. Loose broke it with a pleasant sigh. “Did you know that he wasn't a doctor before I got into a coma?”

Of course she knew, they were all old friends, she just figured that it was not the time to tell her. “He wasn't?”

“Yeah, he used to be an aspiring dancer but now he's neurologist. He started studying after I blacked out, gave up his dream on the spot. He figured that if anyone was going help me get better it would be him. Three years with an apprenticeship then he got his recommendation by the local hospital. First thing he did was insist on taking care of me specifically.”

“That's a little extreme, giving his dream up just so he can take care of you and not another, more experienced pony?”

She gave her that same soft gaze and said, “You do crazy things when you're in love.”

Roseluck looked to her, wide eyed. She let her go then gave the sky her solemn smile. She didn’t need to ask her anymore. Loose had answered her questions for her.

Half of her spoke up, urging her to tell her that they were friends. That she was there when the hospital set fire. That she was there just as often as Stable was when she was admitted here in Ponyville.

And perhaps remembering only him was for the best.

Rose stood up, then stepped down onto the grass. She looked up to her, still on the bleachers, and noticed that there was mud on her hooves. She was probably playing in the mud before she got here. “She hasn’t changed.

“I come here every night, you know?” Rose said.

“I remember that… somehow. I don’t know why but I do.” Loose wanted to ask why but that would be for another day.

She walked away, happy she remembered, even if it was only a little. “I’ll see you in the morning, Loose.”

“Good night, Rosie.”

She even remembered my nickname.

Loose stayed there with her thoughts. She didn’t know how long she was there but she wanted to stay a little longer but home beckoned and he would still be waiting. She was probably worrying him again.

Passed the shrubbery and the park lake, beyond town square and Sugarcube Corner was the Stable household, just across from the local library. She remembered the path by heart, eager and jolly as she made her way to the foot of the property.

Her steps were steady and quiet along the walkway, making sure not to alarm him. Once at the door, she leaned into the bush and pulled a key covered in plastic. Key in hoof, she unlocked the door.

She peeked inside, shifting her head from side to side, seeking any sign of him.

The house was dark, save for the living room. He was probably in there.

Inside, she found him lying gracelessly on the sofa, lit up by the fireplace. The stool by the sofa had cup with remnants of coffee in it. One of her old books, The Catcher and the Rye, was on the floor, half-read by the looks of the bookmark. There was even another bouquet with her name on it resting on the recliner.

He wasn’t drooling or snoring, just dead silent beyond the faint sounds of his breath.

She caressed the caramel-colored coat of his cheek. With only a moment’s hesitation, she leaned in then kissed it. Only inches away from him, she whispered in his ear. “Dance with me, would you? Like you used to.”

“In the morning…” he mumbled in his mild daze.

With a playful roll of the eyes, she left the room then returned minutes later with his blanket. She set it over him.

With one last kiss good night, she stood up to leave for the guest room.

Somewhere in his weary stupor, he mustered the urge to grab her hoof.

She turned to him, surprised. “You’re a funny stallion.”

She lifted the sheets then crawled in next to him. With the lack of space, she let her legs intertwine with his as she rested against his chest. She could hear his heartbeat thrum like a lullaby that sang her to sleep.

Loose nuzzled him, cooing as he responded with a nuzzle of his own.

Sleep nearly took her as the night drew on. Eyes closed and mind at ease, she could feel the madness that haunted her fade into obscurity. Then suddenly all was still, all was quiet, and one could only hear the faint whispers of the night.

In her own haze, she could barely see him shift underneath her, hardly feel his breath on her muzzle, scarcely feel his hoof on her cheek.

But even in her stupor, against the fading senses and dread of sleep, she could feel the familiar taste of his lips against her own, pressed delicately and motioned with hers.

Then sleep took her, dreams alight with memories of a stable doctor.