The way I started out is meaningless, and though it was actually, truthfully, only a generation ago, I don’t remember much. Only the burning desire to wreak havoc upon the land that, at that time, only existed within my troubled mind. Everything in the beginning was a sheet of an empty canvas, among untouched sheets of yet to be molded clay.
But as I flew through one part, she glided above the other, illuminating the ground with her own magic. Mine? That was mere destruction. And, even as I spread nothing but chaos and black, she soon caught up, only to fix my wrongdoings. And I loved that about her; Celestia always had a way to sate my uncontrollable hunger for disarrangement, for all five horizons revolved around her soul. I was as the earth to the sun. Something for her to shine her warm light upon. What did I do? Floated away… selfishly.
Now, the air I tasted and breathed has taken a turn. I sit here in my bleak room, staring out at the wide, wild world I’ve been crumbling for the last day, and can’t help but to cry. Everything we’ve been through, she and I; it’s color has gone black. All I taught her was everything. She showed me how to live in purity, and in return, I tutored her on how I harnessed the world’s elements, and forced them to bend to my whim. She surpassed the master, though. By simply charming those figments of power, she had them start building the world for her…
I know she gave me everything that she wore, from the sun to the grass. But, I was too childish to hold it together. I eventually abused it foolishly, and tarnished the land slowly without her ever even noticing. My claws chafe beneath the clouds. They also turn them from white to black. Anything I touch, or even merely look at these days does just that. The mountains, the sea, the sky. It all turns black, and I can do nothing to stop it. It’s pointless to try, for everypony knows I’m the being bringing the undesirable change.
The innocent ponies have all been washed in black. Tattooed everything. I take a walk outside, and I’m surrounded by colts at play. I don’t hear their giggles. I can feel their laughter, and it’s directed at me. They’re not the only ones. I can sense the thoughts of the parents, too. They’re screaming, “Discord’s the one at fault.” Then the air around me falls silent.
I curse at these twisted thoughts that spin around my head. No matter how much an effort I put forth to end it all, they echo loudly inside, spinning me round in the sky. I get so badly high from the twisted thoughts, I’m spinning… Spinning… Oh, how much a shame it is that the sun can drop so quickly. Just the other day, we had it out. Can one imagine? Discord and Celestia. The earth and the sun, arguing about such frivolous things like the color black?
It’s such a chaotic color, too. Is it even a color? I’m not even sure that’s been agreed upon yet, but it would make sense in light of recent events for the citizens to dismiss it as such. It would be my fault the color black becomes a measly shade of silhouette nothingness.
As my bitter claws crackle broken glass of what was everything, all these pictures around me, hanging tilted on the walls visually wash away in black. I’ve tattooed everything, just like the world outside these walls. All the love I developed for her has finally gone bad, only to turn my world to black... Tattooed all I see, all that I am, all I'll be…
Oh, I know, Celestia… And Luna, too. You’ll have a beautiful life. Because I have a feeling you’ll somehow find this in the distant future... Celestia, by now, you’ll be the sun in somepony else’s sky, just as Luna will hopefully be the moon amongst those wondrous stars we used to look up at.
Do you recall? The evenings we’d spend with each other? Just lying there in the fields? … But why? Why can’t it be mine? Can’t you be mine? Is it because I’ve stupidly sinned so many times? Is it for vengeance? Do you hate what I’ve become? Am I too shrouded in sheer black that you can’t shine your light upon where I stand anymore?
I’m sorry, but by the end of today, this note will mean nothing. I’ll have destroyed you, your star in the sky, the moon… and the world, too. Writing to cope with my insanity as you once called it is meaningless now. I’ll be seeing you soon, and though I wish I could spare someone I love, I know that by then, I will have lost all capable control of myself. It wouldn’t surprise me if my name became the literal meaning of chaos.
Celestia lowered the note to proceed staring at the now statued draconequus. Even in his stone prison, his disruptive magic was able to pull his final, questionably sane writings from the void. With the tainted inc smeared around the edges from his grip, and the obviously nervous claw writing, she could tell he was under a lot of pressure when jotting his jumpy thoughts down.
Despite that, she now realized Discord was doing the best he could to contain the beastly mentality as best he could, but it was no use. It soon came to the mare after a small deal of further thought, she’d been practicing her strategy with him all wrong. If the monstrosity that dominated Discord couldn’t be contained, maybe allowing it to be set free was the actual way to go.
Perhaps, if the princess attempted to let him harness his dark powers and use them for better reasons, he’d find a way to live among her subjects as a friend, not a devil. All it took for her to become aware of this solution was a letter from the past.