I told you I'd do it, but you didn't believe me. Why didn't you believe me?!
Ana'Ra definitely fainted this time. He just careened face first to the ground. He knows this because he can feel a few loose teeth and his nose is sore from the impact. I did a face plant. By all things bright, I hope I didn't do anything ELSE that was embarrassing. He can't be dead. He wouldn't be feeling splinters in his back if he were dead. He also wouldn't be smelling oak, or the musty scent of mildew. Why am I in a library?
This is when the audio picks up for him and he can hear voices. The voices are filled with concern, but for the longest time he can't understand any words. It all sounds like pigdin to him. He's reminded of game he used to play with Claudia and Lydia. They would spread out over the brownstone and and yell pig-Latin phrases to each other. The only way to win was to make sure the other players could never guess what it was you said. He always lost that game to Claudia…
"…not any critter I've ever seen."
"…walking on his hind legs! Have you ever SEEN such a disgusting display?"
"Maybe he's from some kind of circus? He could be one of the attractions. One of those-uh-?"
"Circus freaks?"
"Rainbow, why did you have say something so vulgar?"
"Because LOOK AT HIM! No hooves, weird clothes, and the smell- UGH, the last time I smelled something like that was in the locker room of the Wonderbolts Academy."
"Hey, look ya'll, he's wakin' up!"
Indeed, Ana'Ra was opening his eyes. Every inch of him ached and he couldn't tell why. He was also hot for some reason. The room he was in was at room temperature, but for whatever reason, he was burning up. A fever maybe-? He turned his sweating head a little and was face to face with Princess Twilight.
"Are you alright?"
"Not really," Ana'Ra lamented, "I hurt everywhere, and when did someone turn on the sauna? Dial it down a little, will ya?"
"I'm afraid a sauna would never fit in this library, darling," said another voice, "although, it would add something to the decor…"
"No, Rarity! I'm not having the books ruined on account of some novelty," spoke the Princess, then to Ana'Ra she said, "You broke out into a fever shortly after you passed out. You're in the Golden Oak Library, my home, and we're trying to get you well. Have you been sick long?"
"Negative, Your Highness," Ana'Ra answered, "this is the first time I've fallen ill in years. My troops used to joke I couldn't catch a cold, even if I tired."
"Well, whatever it is you have, it struck very quickly. I know that Nurse Redheart may have something to make you better. Fluttershy left to get her."
"Miss Fluttershy?" Ana'Ra asked.
"Yes. Do you know Fluttershy?"
"Sorta. When I- landed here, it was in Miss Fluttershy's yard. Don't even know how I got there. Just a moment fo darkness then whoosh! I was here."
"Oh, how dashing an entrance! I wonder how Fluttershy handled it all?"
"We should ask her when she backs back here with Nurse Redheart."
"I bet she panicked and hid behind a fence post or something."
"Dash, you know better than that!"
"But it's true!" Rainbow Dash said, "Ole Miss Butterfly Butt freaks out over her own shadow!"
"Dash, you know as well as I do that Fluttershy can be brave. Remember when she stared down that dragon? Or that time she saved me from being a garden gnome by taking on that cockatrice? And remember when she handled that manticore? Need I remind you that she was the one who that practically tamed Discord? Is any of this ringing a bell?"
"Okay, okay, I get it! She has some guts; don't you think I know that? But this- thing is something we've never encountered before. I don't really know how 'Shy reacted, but if it was me, I would freaking out right now. NOT that I would EVER do that."
"Princess? Is Rainbow Dash the pegasus with the rainbow for a mane?"
"Yes, she is. Why do you ask?"
"Because methinks she doth protest too much. Way to save some face their, Skittles. Now tell us how you really feel…"
"What did you just-"
Anything else Rainbow Dash had to say was drowned out as the door to the library flew open and two ponies rushed inside. One was a light gray pony in a nurses hat, the other was aforementioned golden mare.
"Thanks, Twilight, I'll take it from here."
The nurse pony poked and prodded Ana'Ra for almost ten minutes. He was starting to feel like a lab experiment. When she was done she turned to the group and let them know of her prognosis.
"It looks like a form of feather flu, although I've never seen it in a non-equine before. He should be better in three days, granted he drinks plenty of water and eats well. I'm going to give some medicine to ease his aches and reduce his fever. He's to take two of these pills every four hours; they should make him right as rain again."
"Thank you, Nurse Redheart. We'll see to it that he rests."
The nurse pony nods her head and trots out of the library just as Fluttershy approaches Ana'Ra.
"Could he be contagious? I heard feather flu can spread."
"I don't think so, Applejack, at least not among earth ponies and Unicorns…"
"I don't think so, either," Fluttershy says, "if he were, I would be sick too."
"So what happened out there at your cottage, 'Shy? This guy tells us he landed in your yard."
"Well, he did," Fluttershy confirms, "I was just feeding the chickens, like I usually do. I was spreading feed out and when I turned towards the cottage he just appeared out of nowhere. Of course, I had to help him out, to see if he was okay. He didn't look any critter from Everfree Forest."
"What sort of creatures usually inhabit such a place, Miss Fluttershy?" Ana'Ra asked.
"Most are harmless creatures: bunnies, owls, the occasional phoenix. But there are also manticores, timber wolves, and cockatrices. Its not all that safe, but at night, it gets worse.
"Duly noted."
"You know, all this time, we've been talkin' about this guy but we don't even know his name!"
"You're right, Applejack. I can't believe we didn't bother asking."
"In all the excitement, it's a wonder we could even remember our own! So what is your name, guy?"
"I'm Moexatl Ana'Ra," Ana'Ra says, "You can call me Ana'Ra."
"You have a funny name."
"Pinkie Pie…"
"Your name is funny, too."
"Well, you have funny-looking eyes!"
"You have funny-looking hair."
"You have a funny-looking face!"
"Well, you have a funny-sounding voice!"
After a beat, Pinkie Pie says, "I like him! He's silly!"
"We're sorry about that, Ana'Ra."
"Don't be," Ana'Ra says, "that was actually kinda fun!"
"I don't know about you all, but I could eat a manticore raw with slaw. I bet our guest is starving, too."
"Famished, actually."
"Then we should send Spike out to get something. You need to rest, Ana'Ra and I have so many questions to ask you."
"Sounds good to me," Ana'Ra says, "but do you think you could get me a chair?"
FOR PONY!
For the next hour, as everyone ate, Ana'Ra was pummeled by questions from Princess Twilight. He answered them all to the best of his ability, although he felt some of the questions were too personal for comfort. And she had an endless barrage of questions. Through the interview, she kept asking him about his "alien culture." He took some offense to that, then realized to these ponies, he very much was an alien. And given what he heard form Rarity (he had been formally introduced to the Princess' friends after he was seated on a chaise lounge), it could be surmised that bipedal beings were a thing of great novelty.
While he wasn't entirely thrilled by the grilling Princess Twilight was giving him, he was rather pleased with the fare that passed for lunch. Back home, he never eat rutabaga or spinach. It was a place of some contention with his daughters, as they called him out on his hypocrisy with vegetables. Ana'Ra wasn't a carnivore nominally, but even he could admit he need some more green in his diet. He did some vegetables, like corn, celery, carrots, pickles, cucumbers and the occasional serving of green beans (though they were heavily salted.) Yet, the spinach and rutabaga salad he was eating was actually pretty good, thanks in part to the peanuts sprinkled liberally on it. When bellies were full, a new round of discussion began, with Ana'Ra in the middle.
"I bet you think this all a little strange." the Princess said.
"Damned straight it is," Ana'Ra confirms, "I mean, I knew horses can be smart and most of the equine species are not dumb by any right… Still, talking ponies! It feels a little silly, but given that I see no other apparatus that helps any of you speak, I can only assume you all evolved this way. That would make for a fascinatin' scientific study…"
'Sir, are you there, sir?'
"I'm here, Stephanie. Where in the flamin' hell have you been?"
'I'm sorry about that, sir. Something happened in my logical processor; it took all my processing power to resolve the error.'
"Any change in status?"
'None so far, sir, but I thought you should know that your core temperature is running high. Readings from your neural interface say you have a fever of 103°. Is everything all right?'
"It seems I've contracted some kind of influenza. Might be a local variant, no strain I know causes symptoms to occur this quickly."
"Excuse me, Ana'Ra, but who are talking to?"
"My apologies, Twilight," Ana'Ra says, "my ancilla only just came back online. She wanted to know if I was doing okay."
"Your… ancilla?"
Ana'Ra nods, explaining, "It's like an assistant. Though, unlike your dragon buddy, Stephanie exists only on a 8 Terabyte solid state drive plugged into my helmet. If you want, I can have you meet her."
"You can do that?"
"Sure," Ana'Ra answers, "Excuse me while I whip this out…"
Ana'Ra reaches for something conical at his waist and every pony in the room gasps.
"Relax, it's just a miniature holostage."
Ana'Ra drops the device on the floor of the library, where it lands flat on its wide bottom end.
"Steph, can you transfer to Echo-Five and go into active display mode?"
'Yes, sir. One moment…'
For several seconds nothing happens. Then, to the surprise of many (and the delight of Pinkie Pie), a royal hued translucent entity emerges from the disc. The being resembles Ana'Ra in general anatomy but has softer lines and appears feminine in form.
"Good afternoon."
The ponies are in awe of the technological wonder that is Stephanie's holographic form. She surveys the room from the holostage, seeing things even the ponies didn't know existed. Eventually, she stops turning and bows in Ana'Ra's direction.
"Is there anything I can do for you, sir?"
"Yeah," Ana'Ra says, "Can you give a brief description of what you are to these ponies. Don't think they've seen an A.I. before."
"Gladly! I am Stephanie, an artificially intelligent semi-sentient computer construct, acting as ancillary and adjunct to General Moexatl. If you have any questions, I would be glad to answer them.
Face-palming himself as Princess Twilight eyes showed an eagerness for knowledge. Ana'Ra quietly says, "I should have brought a book."