Ponies Anonymous

by DontAskForCookie

PA Chapter 2: "Boxed In"

"Is there a problem with the chute?" I asked sheepishly to the lower half of the superintendent that was hanging out of the open metal hatch in the wall. Hearing a low grumbling from inside the garbage chute I immediately started to regret my decision.

Most everyone living in my apartment building knew better than to disturb Mr. Shipley while he worked, and most avoided him as best as possible the rest of the time anyway. Standing in the hall with a large plastic garbage bag of trash from the party last night in silence for nearly five minutes however, had made me feel sufficiently silly enough to try my luck.

Looking up and down the hall I debated the possibility of just running for it before he managed to pull himself out of the garbage chute and identify me. Some would say that was a bit of an overreaction, but those people had never been on the receiving end of one of Mr. Shipley's tirades before. The man seemed to loathe his job, the building, and every tenant living inside of it.

Fleeing may have been a good plan but before I could implement it he had already pulled his head out of the dark hole in the wall, letting the metal door close with a loud snap that made me jump. Just as I had imagined the vein in his forehead was already throbbing, like some sort of glaring red warning. Combined with his towering stature and evil eyed glare the overall effect was quite stunningly intimidating.

"What?" he asked in a low voice that seemed to just dare me to repeat myself.

I paused for a moment, building up the courage to follow through with my question. "uhhh.. The chute, I was wanting to use it and I was wondering if something was wrong with it". With each word his eyes just narrowed more and more.

Cocking his shaved head Mr. Shipley raises a brow and glances at the garbage chute, then back at me. "This garbage chute?".

Ok, he was fucking with me now, I knew it, and he knew I knew it, but I still just stood there looking completely flummoxed by his question. This clenches it, I should have just run for it, or maybe just have avoided contact in the first place.

Pointing the heavy mag-light in his hand toward the Chute he continues to taunt me. "You want to know if there is something wrong with this garbage chute? You think I would just go poking my head in there if there wasn't anything wrong with it? Like I don't have anything better to do with my time?". Narrowing his eyes at me I can see the tattoos on his exposed skin contract as he tightens his muscles like a beast preparing to pounce.

"I'm just going to go take this downstairs myself and toss it in the dumpster" I awkwardly spit out and quickly started to backpedal. Turning I increase my pace as I half jogged for the safety of the elevator. Though I didn't dare look back as I could feel Mr. Shipley's eyes burning a hole into the back of my head as I fled.

Rubbing some of the sleep from my eyes as I walked back into the lobby after dumping my trash I decided to go ahead and check my mail since I was already downstairs. moving to the wall of locked mailboxes I fish out my key and slide it into place, pulling out a small hand full of letters and tucking them under my arm before locking the box shut again.

“Bill, bill, trash, birthday card, bill, birthday card…”, I say out loud as I browse through the collection of letters, absentmindedly scratching at my sore tattoo. Moving to the elevator I nudge the call button with my elbow without looking up, Climbing on and riding it up as I opened the birthday cards (deciding to avoid the bills till I was more awake). Hearing the door open I start to step forward, still thinking aloud. “That was nice of aunt Pam,”

“What was nice of aunt Pam now?” comes a cheery but strained voice from just outside the door. Glancing up I see a slim pair of legs poking out from under a large cardboard box.

“Janet?” I ask, trying to figure out what she was doing on my floor. Glancing to the glowing row of buttons I noticed I was one floor short, having stopped on the fourth. Looking back to her I step forward and peer around the box, “Need a hand with this?”

The grinning face on the other side of the box nods, small beads of sweat apparent on her brow from trying to do this on her own. “That would be great Liam, I’m trying to get this downstairs quickly. If you could just help me get it to the lobby I would appreciate it, I can get it to my car from there”.

Grabbing hold of the box I try and nearly fail to lift the box out of her arms, almost throwing myself off balance from the unexpected weight of it. Whatever was inside this box was heavy as hell, it was actually a bit baffling to me how such a small woman like Janet had gotten it to the elevator by herself. From the look of her red face (which was not from drinking for once) it must not have been easy.

Stepping back onto the elevator on unsteady feet I make room for her to follow. “Hope you don't mind going up first, I was heading up to my room,” Breathing deeply from effort Janet just waves her hand to show it wasn't a problem. Chuckling I lean against one of the walls and use it to help keep balance. “Alright… so what is all this anyway?”.

Fanning herself with her hand she takes a few more breaths. Besides being sweaty I'm again reminded how pretty she was when not passed out in the hall, my thought from last night and how she could easily pick up someone better than her boyfriend floats back to the surface of my mind. She wasn't stunning by any means, dressed in jeans, a fuchsia v-neck shirt , and her head overflowing with dark frizzy hair, but she could still do better.

Finally catching her breath she nods towards the box, “Just some of my stuff I need to get out of the apartment for the night.”

“Like what?” I ask bluntly, glancing down at the heavy box in my arms. I know it was none of my business to know what was inside the box, but I'm a bit of a snoop by nature. Already I could feel my curiosity starting to rise over what I was holding and why she needed to be rid of it for a while.

Sticking her tongue out she makes a goofy face. “None of your business, all you need to know is that it’s mine and that I need to get it out to my car before my boyfriend sees it. He’s having some friends over tonight and I have to get it out of sight before they show up.”

Blinking, I think back to my trip to the dumpster and frown. “You mean Koontz?”

Laughing lightly at my question she nods. “Well DUH! Who else would I be talking about? You know that if Markie ever cut it off with me you would be the first to know!” she says in a teasing tone, following it up with a wink.

Despite myself I couldn't help but blush a little (which probably looked like a great deal more than a little with my pale complexion) at her joke. It had been a long time since I had actually gotten to talk to Janet while she was sober and I had forgotten how much of a joker she was. “Yes, well if you're trying to keep Marcus from seeing this then you're not going to be able to get it out the lobby. I was just outside dumping some garbage and I saw him parked in the alley nearest the front door.”

The elevator dinged to announce we had arrived at my floor, meanwhile Janet just blinked as she processed what I had told her. “He’s… wait, he’s parked? Was it a yellow Honda? The dick, I told him I needed my car today! Why’d he have to pick today of all days to use it!?” Her face quickly begins to go red again as she starts to fume.

Cursing my luck for getting caught up in Janet and Marcus’s business again, I nod at her question of the car. “He was talking to some people, looked kind of shady actually…”

“And he’s working in it too!?” She snaps, moving from the elevator in a huff, her shoulders hitched up as she stomps away from the sliding doors. I mused to myself that the whole effect of seeing someone who didn't even break the five foot mark so mad was almost cute. However I quickly got over that thought as I realized she had just exited onto my floor.

Cursing under my breath I follow after her as quickly as I can while still holding the mysterious heavy box. “Wait, where do you think you’re going?” I called after her even though I was fairly sure I knew the answer already. My heart dropped even before she answered as I saw her turn left down the hall in the direction of my apartment.

“I told you I had to store that for the night,” she says without turning, clearly talking about the box in my arms. “Since I can't get it out to my car and I can't very well leave it at my place tonight I need someplace to put it”. Stopping, she sighs before turning around and fixing me with what must have been a very well practiced puppy dog face. “You wouldn't mind holding on to it would you? It would mean an awful lot to me.”

Feeling a twinge in my chest I can already feel my defenses falling. Why? Why couldn't I just keep out of other peoples business! If Marcus caught me spending time with Janet he would play hopscotch with my spine! But on the other hand, how could I say no to that face? That evil face, it was sure to be the death of me.

Groaning, I nod as I accept my fate. “Fine, you can keep it at my place but only if you tell me what it is I'm holding onto here. We have a deal?” The last part was phrased as a question but was more of a statement. Janet seemed to be out of options and If I was going to get cornered into watching out for her box, then at the very least I could have was the satisfaction to sate my curiosity. Besides, color me cautious but watching a box belonging to a drug dealer's girlfriend without knowing what was inside was just a dumb idea.

She grinned as I caved into her request as she turns and returns to walk to my door, this time a satisfied spring replacing her angry march from before. “It’s a deal, just wait till we get inside to open it up ok?”

Josh whistles as the box is finally opened, even from where he was standing across the living room going through the letters he had picked out from the pile on the counter he could easily see the contents of the box. “Now that is a metric butt load of liquor!”

Taking it as a complement Janet grins as she begins to pull out some of the bottles one at a time and set them on the coffee table. “You bet your ass!”

I had to agree with the sentiment, the box was absolutely overflowing with various bottles of different alcoholic drinks. As much as I feel like I should have seen this coming, I'm also astonished that this was what she was making such a big deal over. Lifting a hand to my temple I begin to rub away an oncoming headache. “Janet, why are you stowing what I assume amounts to nearly half of a bars inventory at my apartment?”

“Because Marcus is having some of his friends over tonight to party and I don't want them to drink all my stash. I mean look at this! A full handle of Kraken Spiced rum, bottle and a half of flavored Vodka, Scotch, and Brandy. If I leave this there tonight, those animals will leave me dry!”

Josh muttered something that sounded an awful lot like “God Forbid” under his breath which earned him a harsh glare from Janet. Turning tale josh pockets his mail and makes for his room. “Back in a sec, need to go grab my bags. I'm heading out in just a bit,” I had to bite my tongue not to laugh a bit at his retreat.

Pushing myself to the edge of my seat on the sofa I lift my head to look down into the box. Janet had already pulled out quite a few bottles to display on the table but I could see there were several more inside. I could easily identify most of them but there at the bottom of the box, or what I could see at the bottom past all the bottles, was a whole row of jars. “Say, what's that at the bottom?”

Turning her glare from Joshes door she looks back to me and then the box, a wide grin spreading across her face. “That,” she began as she dug out a single mason jar, “Is a little gift from back home.” Brandishing the Jar in both hands she holds it up for me to see, peering at me through the transparent liquid inside of it. “White Lightning!”

I nearly choked as she spoke, nearly a third of the box was full of those jars! “Janet are you nuts? I don't want to store your moonshine in my apartment!” I hissed quietly so Josh wouldn’t hear from his room. Its not like I’m much of a stickler for rules and such, but Moonshine was illegal for Christ sake. The stuff wasn't exactly super hard to come by, I had even sampled it once a long time ago at a party (or so I was told, the whole night is a blur to me) but Janet had at least a half dozen jars of the stuff in this box.

Rolling her eyes she pulls out another jar, this one clouded and tinted purple, and unscrews the top. “Oh don't be such a stiff,” she commented offhandedly as she reaches her fingers into the jar and plucks out some small dark shape. Raising it to her lips, she pauses long enough before popping it into her mouth for me to see that it is a grape, which explained the odd colorization of Moonshine.

The grape squishes in her mouth as she bites down and I can see her cheeks starting to flush as she chews the plump liquor filled fruit. Smiling, she swallows and holds out the jar, “want one? They’re really good!”

I was already ready to fall over from the smell of the hooch from the second she opened the jar, but now that it was in my face I couldn't help but scrunch up my nose. “Ummm, no thanks, I’ll pass”. Janet giggles and swallows, pulling the jar back and resealing it before placing it and the rest of her stash away in the box with a shrug.

“Your loss, they really are terrific. I was even going to leave you a bottle as a thank you for letting me keep this at your place tonight, but I’m guessing that you wouldn't accept.” Standing, she folds the top of the box closed again and turns to face me, another goofy smile on her face. “So instead I think I’ll let you buy me a drink tonight.”

“No,” I say a little more quickly and flatly than I had intended. I was already worried enough about Marcus flipping out on me for just spending time with Janet around the apartment, but taking her out for a drink? That option was not on the table.

Janet’s happy little grin melts into a dejected frown as she flops down on the sofa next to me. Pulling out her old bag of tricks she fixes me with her pouty lips and big watery green eyes. “Oh come on, it will be fun. I really need someone to go out with me tonight, ok? I swear Marcus won't have to know, hes going to be home all night anyway getting high and drinking everything I left behind at the apartment!”

Between the realization that this wasn't the entirety of her collection and her begging, I wasn't sure what to be more shocked about. She had always been clingy but to put so much effort into getting me out for a drink? This didn't seem right to me, she knew how crazy Koontz was. There was something I was missing here and for once I was going to try and keep my nose out of it.

Turning my head I roll my eyes, I felt bad to turn her down like this but she really was being a child. I'd sooner go and knock on Mr. Shipley’s door at two in the morning than risk a night out with Janet. “I don’t think it’s a good idea Janet”

“Please?” she continues. “I don't want to go out drinking alone tonight and most of my drinking buddies are busy. Consider it a birthday present, ok?”.

I almost scoff as she tries to play the birthday card, like this was some sort of gift for me. Before I could comment however Josh speaks up as he steps out of his room with his luggage slung over his shoulder. “A bit late for that, party was yesterday Janet. I bet you would have been a hit though if you had brought some of that up. Though, now that I think about it, how did you know it was his birthday, you remember it from last year or something?”.

Rolling my eyes I stand up from the sofa, moving away from Janet as I go to open the door for Josh. “I bumped into her last night and again today when I was reading some cards from home, besides I didn't even have a birthday party last year.” I shuddered a bit and glanced to the window while thinking about last year but quickly pushed the thought from my mind.

Blinking Janet looks between the two of us, “Oh, Liam had a birthday?”.

Turning the door handle I prop the door open and look to Janet, “Yes, you don't remember last night, in the elevator?” From her blank Look I could tell she did not. Thinking back, I had never explained the comment in the elevator about aunt Pam, and there really was no way she could have seen the cards before I pocketed them to help her with the box. The gears of my mind start to stall a bit as they try and work out how she knew.

“Consider it a birthday present”, she had said, but how could she have known?

Josh was halfway to the door when I finally figured it out. Mentally facepalming at how obvious it was I reprimand myself for not figuring it out before. For a pro snoop like me its a bit embarrassing it took me so long to puzzle it out. Looking back to Janet I offer a small smile as I guess. “sooo… its your birthday is it?”

The small woman on my sofa nods as I finally catch on, her arms crossed in front of her. Chuckling as he passes Josh and gives me a soft punch in the shoulder as he glances back her way. “Oh shit man, I guess you don't have a choice. You have to take her out for a drink now.” From the smile on Janet's face she seemed to agree. “I’ll catch you around when I get back, leaving my spare above the door in case you lose your key again while i'm gone. try not to get pummeled while I'm not here to watch your back alright?”

My shoulders slump as I locked the door behind Josh and leaned against the back of the door. “Ok, so I have one question for you-”

“Where are we going exactly?” asked Ronnie From the driver seat as I quickly ducked inside. The Idiot was smiling like a kid on Christmas morning while I was just trying to manage ducking as low into the back seat without completely wrinkling my outfit. It was fairly dark out but I still didn't want to take any chances being seen.

“What's wrong with him?” he asks as Janet follows me into Ronnie's car, his voice drifting of a bit at end as the split in her dress parts as she steps into the back with me. I don't look up from her leg to check but I’m pretty sure that Ronnie was also staring. As nice as Janet usually looked, she was now dressed to the nines having picked up a change of cloths earlier in the day while I got some work done on an important commision. She was now fully made up and dressed to kill.

Ignoring Ronnie's long whistle of approval Janet shuts the door behind her and fixes her dress. “He’s just worried about Markie when he should be focusing on having a good time. Hopefully a few drinks will fix that”. Turning she smiles at me, thankfully I had returned my gaze to head level in time to avoid being too obvious.

Fixing the rear view mirror Ronnie loosens his tie a bit and puts the car into drive. “Alrighty, then let’s go get some social lubricant in the kid. Any ideas where we can do that exactly?”

Watching the apartment roll past us as we pulled into the street I couldn't help but question my choice in back up when I had selected Ronnie. My deal with Janet allowed for one friend to tag along, so long as it was someone she had at least met before. Ronnie fit the bill and was a good pall but I needed someone to watch my back tonight, not help me get drunk.

Grinning, Janet lifts a finger into the air triumphantly, a grin plastered across her face. “Tonight Gentlemen, the night of my twenty fifth year on this earth, we shall be dancing and drinking at Terminal West!”