//------------------------------// // XXIII: Futile efforts // Story: The Flutterheart Diaries // by lilinuyasha //------------------------------// 6-14-13 Well the gala was a success. Anacrusis didn’t think the same, however. When we got back, we found out that he had been crying nearly the entire time we were gone. Of course, I decided to pay the sitter a little extra to compensate for that, but I will say that the minute Anacrusis saw us, he stopped crying almost immediately. It was cute, yes, but I’m not sure how to feel about it. I wonder if he’s going to get too dependant later on in life. We’ll just have to wait and see. Anacrusis’ vocab decided to expand. He learned his second word today. “Mom”. Flutterheart couldn’t be more excited. Honestly, I’m glad his second word was mother related. I almost feel like Fluttershy missed out on a part of essential foalhood by not hearing “Momma” as his first word. But now that he’s shouting out “Band mom!” everything’s alright. I don’t think she was upset that Band was his first word, but I still feel kinda bad. Almost like I wanted her to have the satisfaction of his first word. I don’t know. That’s just me. Flutterheart and I have been discussing more and more recently about having another foal. She and I have always wanted a daughter with an older brother, and having another foal is the best way to try and make that happen. Only problem is that there’s no guarantee that it’ll be a filly. Flutterheart and I do want another child, though, and the risk is well worth the reward. I guess we’ll be trying to have another kid soon. I guess that ties in to the topic of making love. I think I’m at the point where it doesn’t really bother me anymore, so long as it’s Flutterheart. There’s still a bit of awkwardness whenever I hear other ponies around the school talk about what they did with their special somepony, and it still upsets me to think that high school ponies are doing it, but that’s just the world we live in right now. Needless to say, I still don’t like to really talk about it in front of other ponies. That’s a private matter. Otherwise, I have no problem making love to Flutterheart, because it’s exactly that. I’m not having meaningless sex with her. I guess that was really my big problem all along. Now that I’ve found something real with somepony I love, I’ve released most of my sexual inhibitions. I love her. Free of inhibitions, Trey *** “Oh, thank you so much for having me over!” said Chocolate Cherry as she, Anacrusis, and Flutterwing trotted in from school. “We’re happy to have you, Chocolate!” said Fluttershy. “You’re welcome over anytime.” said Trey, smiling at her. Chocolate Cherry looked up at him and smiled, before she and Anacrusis trotted to the living room. “Can we play Frisbee again?” she asked. Flutterwing, without hesitation, grabbed it and trotted back to the living room. Chocolate Cherry smiled at her and the three went outside to the meadow. “Trey?” asked Fluttershy. “Yes?” “What’s wrong? You seem...off.” “Oh?” he asked, sighing. “I guess so.” he added, looking out the window towards Chocolate Cherry. “Trey...I know what you’re thinking.” “Is it that obvious?” “Trey...” “I just wish I could help her.” “I know.” said Fluttershy, trotting over to him. She leaned against him, looking out the window at Chocolate Cherry as well. “I just know that the only real thing I can do is bring her over here in hopes that it delays whatever it is her dad’s doing to her.” “Trey...” “You try to protect your foals for as long as you can...what happens if Anacrusis or Flutterwing find out?” “Everypony grows up eventually. The best we can do is keep it from happening to them.” “I know they’ll find out about that stuff eventually. It just still upsets me. You and I are giving them a loving home, and some ponies out there just...it’s not fair.” “Trey, things have a way of working out.” “But what if it doesn’t?” “I’m sure it will, Trey.” “I just wish i could do more to help her.” “Trey...we’re doing all we can.” “It just doesn’t feel like enough.” “Trey...everything will be alright in the end. And if it’s not alright...it’s not the end.” “You stole my quote...” said Trey, looking over at her. He put his head down low and sighed. “You’re right. I guess I just have to keep doing my best and hope.” “Trey...you have the kindest heart I’ve ever seen out of anypony. But some things are out of our control. I know you wish you could help her...but sometimes you have to accept that you can’t help everypony.” Trey sighed, leaning heavily against her. He nuzzled her neck with his nose, tickling her. “I love you, Flutterheart. Never forget that.” *** “What time does your dad usually come home?” asked Trey. “Around 8...” said Chocolate Cherry, sadly. “We’d probably best get you home before he comes back.” “Yeah...” “Don’t worry. I’ll be there to make sure nothing happens.” said Trey, smiling at her. She tried to smile at him. Really, she didn’t want to go back. Anacrusis seemed to have a happy life, and his parents were happy with each other. Why couldn’t she have a life like that? Trey and Anacrusis trotted home with her, the sun setting behind them. As the figure of that ramshackle house came into view, Chocolate Cherry slowed her pace, dreading to go near. She looked back at Anacrusis and Trey, a frown upon her face. She hung her head low. “Thanks for trotting me home. It...means a lot.” she said, raising her head up again. She gave Anacrusis another quick peck on the cheek, and the two of them both smiled bashfully. Chocolate Cherry slowly, and quietly opened the door, stepping inside, before heading up to her room. Trey waited until a single light came on upstairs before trotting off back towards the cottage with Anacrusis. *** “Trey, you’re doing the best you can.” “It still doesn’t seem like enough.” “Come here.” said Fluttershy, opening her arms, ready to envelop him in a huge hug. Trey trotted over, accepting the hug, before laying down on their bed, looking deep into her eyes. “Trey, you’re a good pony. Every time she comes over, you make her life that much better. You can’t make her entire life better, but for at least 3 or 4 hours of the day, you’re making it that much more bearable. I’m sure Anacrusis is making it fun for her, too. You’re doing a lot for her already. Besides, it’s the thought that counts.” “Not when there’s another life on the line.” he said, sighing. “I know you want to do more...but there’s nothing more you can do, Trey.” “I know...and that’s what bother me. I just feel like there’s at least one more thing I can do.” “And if there is, you’ll always want to find one more thing. Trey, I know you want to do more. Trust me, I do too. But just focus on making her happy one day at a time.” Trey sighed. “You’re right...I guess if there’s more I can do, I’ll find it sometime.” Fluttershy kissed him passionately, stroking his face. “Everything will be ok, Trey.” “I sure hope so.”