Archivist Notation: Warning, crude humor ahead. Think of this as a deleted scene from Wolf and Town. No offense to my pre-readers/editors but, I don't send these to my pre-readers/editors because they are so short and usually just pulled from the "save, but don't use" bin.
--- Apples and Wheat ---
Please flush the toilet when you are done. Failure to do so may cause a build up that will throw the earth out of orbit and plunge us into the sun.
—A bathroom in Austin, Tx
--- Interlude II: Wolf and W.C. ---
"That oughta do fer the trip ta town," Applejack thought aloud, as she looked over the tied down barrels of apples, destined for market.
Applejack was about to check the carts harness when she saw Holo trotting out of the apple cellar wearing a slight frown. The farm mare raised an eyebrow at this, but said nothing. While Applejack wasn't one to hold a grudge, she was still less than happy over the manner in which Holo had woken her up.
As if Applebloom wasn't enough of a pain some mornings, Applejack thought grumpily as she looked over the harness rigging.
Holo, for her part, was too busy glancing about near the apple cellar for the small, one pony privy she remembered from when she and Granny Smith were younger. Finally after, what felt like, ten excruciatingly long minutes, Holo relented and decided to swallow her pride and simply ask the embarrassing question.
"Applejack, where did your family move the privy to?" Holo asked as the building pressure in her abdomen painted her words with some urgency.
Applejack blinked a few times before answering, "The what now?"
Holo went to groan in complaint, but as a certain pressure made its presence strongly known she instead held her rear legs tighter and rephrased herself, "The outhouse, Applejack. It was around the large tree across from the apple cellar, when I was here last."
"Outhouse? Shoot we ain't had one of them in years," Applejack answered, before turning back to the house, "Come on, Ah'll show ya where ya can... do your business."
"Please, do so quickly," Holo said, hurriedly following AJ back into the house.
---
"Here ya go," Applejack said, opening the door to the downstairs bathroom.
The bathroom was a simple, rustic affair. A moderately sized, white porcelain bathtub, with shower head and curtain, a matching porcelain sink that a had a good sized mirror above it. And, most blessed of all, a short, porcelain seat that Holo vaguely recognized, but was able to divine its purpose without asking.
"Everythin's in the usual spot," Applejack said gesturing around the bathroom, "Just meet me out front when yer done."
"Um, Applejack?" Holo hesitantly called out, before the farm mare shut the door completely, as she looked around the porcelain throne.
Applejack turned back and poked her head into doorway with a quirked eyebrow, "What is it, Sugar Cube?"
"How am I to, well that is, I do not see the sponge or bucket," Holo said, hoping she wouldn't have to actually explain the hygienic use of those particular items.
Applejack had to bite back a snicker, here was the mighty Wolf in the Wheat, who could cause wheat to grow in an instant and she was as lost a toddler in potty training.
"See that lever on the side of the seat," Applejack explained, doing her best to keep from grinning, "When yer done just push it down and it'll, um get ya clean."
"Yes, yes now give me privacy," Holo said pushing the bathroom door closed then looked at the toilet with a slight trepidation.
Applejack just shook her head grinning, as she left Holo to her business.
A few minutes later the quiet of the farm house was shattered with the sound of Holo shrieking.
"THE WATER IS COLD!!!"