An ancient creature of chaos floated through the inky black void of space. A cruel smile twisted across its horse-like muzzle as he noticed a blue and green planet suspended in space just ahead.
“Hmmm…looks like another planet ripe for a Discord brand storm of chaos,” the creature chuckled to himself as he steered closer to the unsuspecting world.
KA-BLAM! Discord was knocked out of the void, blindsided by the planet’s moon. He tumbled to the ground, flailing and screaming. Before slamming into the ground, Discord snapped his clawed fingers. He vanished in a flash of light and instantly reappeared on the ground.
Discord noticed a group of creatures in a clearing nearby; multicolored, horned horse-like beings chanting a strange language. A vibrant cone of magic erupted from each horn. As the chanting swelled, the moon vanished over the horizon and the sun rose into the sky.
Chancing to slither closer, Discord watched a tall white creature step out of the circle. A silver crown, encrusted with precious gems of all colors, sat atop the mare’s carefully coiffured violet mane. The same crown, in miniature, was plastered across the creature’s flank. A rich, violet cape covered the unicorn’s back.
“We unicorns have raised the sun,” the unicorn said in a melodious, yet slightly prissy voice. “Earth ponies and pegasi, please come and present your offerings.”
A similar creature, this one lacking a horn, bounded out into the clearing. This must be an earth pony, surmised Discord. “Hi, Princess Platinum! We have your food!” the pony screeched.
The princess and Discord stared in horror at the newcomer. The orange mare wore a white ruff around her neck, along with a brown and yellow tunic. But the horrified stares were directed at the hat, a tall monstrosity that resembled an enormous bowl of chocolate pudding.
“Well, thank you, Chancellor Puddinghead,” the princess stammered, engrossed in the horrid hat.
“It’s NOOO problem,” the chancellor said, bouncing up and down excitedly. “It’s part of the bargain! HEY, did you know that there are no words that rhyme with bargain? I mean, REALLY? But there are LOTS of words that rhyme with beans! Lean, mean, spleen, unclean...” The chancellor babbled on about nothing in particular as a tribe of earth ponies emerged from the woods, carrying baskets of crops in their mouths.
The unicorns and earth ponies, as well as Discord began to get annoyed with the Chancellor’s incessant chatter. Finally, the princess’ horn glowed, levitating an apple from a nearby basket and jammed it into the Chancellor’s mouth. “We accept the earth pony offering.”
Suddenly, the air was filled with the sound of flapping wings. "Hey, wook!" shouted the Chancellor around a mouthful of apple, "It'sh the pegshusssesssessess!"
"Pegasi!" came the perfuctory correction.
The flock of pegasi touched down by the unicorn and earth pony tribes. A helmeted navy blue pegasus stepped forward, his jet black mane and tail rippling in the wind. A gold lightning bolt snaked down his flank. He stamped his hoof and thunder rumbled in the distance.
"Always one for an entrance, Commander," sniffed Princess Platinum. "Show off," she muttered under her breath.
"The pegasi of Pegasopolis bring forth their offering," boomed the Commander. "State your weather needs." The princess and the chancellor rattled off a list of demands: rain for the south fields, snow for the last day of spring, a cloudless day for the Princess' birthday...
The Commander listened stoically to the demands. He unfurled his wings with a flick. The pegasi troops snapped to attention. "You have your orders, troops!" the Commander roared. "Take the food and let us away!" The pegasi picked up the food and took to the air. The unicorns and earth ponies left as well.
Discord emerged from his hiding place and chuckled wickedly. "This might be easier than I thought! He began a chant:
Three warring groups are thee
Pegasus, unicorn and earth pony
Your peace stands now on shaky ground
Discord will be there to pull you down.