Dear Diary,
As you may recall my name was Diddy Lion, the cream of the lovliest ice-cream sundae seen in Equestria-- but now, I'm not exactly as sure. It's been two years since I left this place and now I've arrived again.
I've noticed in my departure Celestia had opened my book and written words when I couldn't. However, I also don't know how I feel about that. This Diary-- was mine-- and I didn't want anypony seeing inside of it at any point in my life. Hopefully she didn't read any of my old entries. Even I don't like remembering what happened back then. But I know now that I'm not a monster, I'm just different from other ponies. Being different is hard for ponies to understand, they're too used to being locked into their own ways to not fear change. Even King Alicorn had been a change.
There had been many challenging forces that he had to face-- and he still faced them now.
Alicorn-- Uncle Alicorn-- poor him. So much more has destroyed his life than could ever destroy mine. I'm lucky, at least I can still find joy everywhere I look. And yet he, as powerful as he is, can't seem to escape being hurt by all those he loves. Then again they only want to do what's best for him right? Perhaps everypony who does something horrible thinks they've done good-- If you think you've done something right and get praise for it then you'll be bound to act as if you've done the right thing and carry on doing so. Silas taught me that when I entered NEMI and he was never proved wrong all the way through the experience. Although I can't say I miss NEMI itself, I do miss the ponies I met there. Other than a few of the nurses and doctors they understood pain and suffering and were more accepting to ponies/creatures who had 'lost their way' we'll say,
Not that things are too much different at home than they are over there. I still have to take my medicine everyday in order to keep my thoughts organized and less manic. It supposedly helps me see the more calm, relaxing side of life. Although I don't especially like the tablets and taking them once each day I feel like I must in order to keep my Mom happy. She certainly seemed happy when she came to pick me up with Sir Midnight Shimmer today.
Somehow though, even though I was happy to see them both again, I felt slightly disappointed when I arrived back home to see none of my old friends around the area. It seems that my brothers have gone to do something away from the Manor until night in order to give me some chance of becoming used to my surroundings once more. Celestia and her family have given no such excuse, they merely have not come round. Maybe because they're busy, being the royal family and all.
Tonight a banquet of food is being prepared to welcome me home. Except I'm still on a strict diet so I cannot eat anything with too much sugar inside of it. It seems the sugar counteracts my treatment. Anyway it doesn't matter too much. I don't need the sugar now to feel better. All I need is to breathe and keep a calm head, as perscribed by Doctor Arteriole. Breathe deeply and remember all of the techniques learned in the classes.
That reminds me, I must ask Celestia why she didn't come to my open day when I'd invited her. She says it had been too soon in here-- I wish to find out what this means. Blankety would have wanted us to carry on being friends. He certainly wouldn't have wanted us to never see each other again. I may have been his eventual demise-- but I know that he doesn't blame me for it. He can't. I never meant to hurt anypony and I never shall do ever again. Silas has given the same promise as me, so if he can do it I can too. There's no way that either of us will do anything as cruel as we may once have done. We're not the same ponies we once were.
My impulsive nature has gone as long as I keep my treatments going, yet I still feel as if it should be I who makes the first step talking to Celestia and the others. It was my faults originally that caused them such pain; that's why I was taken away, but now it should also be I who resolves our differences.
I shall go now and return tonight. I need to make things right-- to make things better.
It's good to write in here once more. Everything's going to be all right this time, you'll see. Nothing can go wrong in my new beginning.