//------------------------------// // Chapter 2: In Which Everyone Just Wastes Time // Story: The Dimensions Uniting Multiverse Bureau // by IceColt //------------------------------// Fluttershy was at home, cleaning the birds’ nests. Most would regard this as a choir, but Fluttershy enjoyed doing those little tasks for her animal friends. It helped her relax and was filling the more uneventful hours of her quiet days. In a sense, her choirs had become her hobbies during her free time, effectively eliminating any necessity to relax from her own work. It was a very useful work attitude, especially considering that Fluttershy almost had no time off. There was always something to do around her cottage and concerning her animal friends. Case in point was Angel, her white rabbit companion. He stood in the middle of the room, impatiently tapping with his left foot as he looked up at the hovering Fluttershy who was carefully tending to a cuckoo’s nest. Not sharing Fluttershy’s relaxed mood, he loudly cleared his throat in demand for attention. “In a minute, Angel,” Fluttershy gently replied, not taking her eyes from the nest as she picked up broken egg shells, fluff and dried-up excrements out of it to deploy them in a basket she carried with her other forehoof. Angel gave an impatient sound as answer, but didn’t push any further. He knew better than to provoke Fluttershy into using her stare, just because he was hungry. Besides, it wasn’t like he enjoyed making problems for the yellow pegasus... most of the time. Trying his best to be patient, Angel looked around the room and then decided to go to the window, the next best thing the bunny rabbit had for a television. With a few skips and one high hop, Angel landed on the window board and regarded the scenery. He found it to be immensely non-stimulating. The lack of a cathode ray tube proved to be more fatal to his quest for distraction than he had anticipated. Angel gave a bored sigh and had already halfway turned around, when movement on the other side of the non-flickering glass caught his attention. He turned back, his ears lifted in curiosity as he looked outside again. The movement was very far away, barely anything more than a speck in the distance, but it came closer quickly. Angel narrowed his eyes, putting a paw above them as a shield against the glaring of the sun while he intently spied through the window into the distance. It took him a few moments to recognize Spike. Angel blinked. What was that purple baby dragon doing here? After all, the library and Fluttershy’s cottage weren’t exactly in the same neighborhood. It was also unusual for him to be without Twilight. Angel narrowed his eyes again. Didn’t the purple dragon seem rather distraught? “What’s going on, Angel?” Angel turned around. Fluttershy had come down from the nests, put the basket down and walked over to Angel, looking through the window as well. She cocked her head. “Isn’t that Spike? What’s he doing here without Twilight?” Angel raised his forepaws in the air and shrugged. He didn’t have enough food in his tummy to think about stuff like that. The thought of food reminded the bunny rabbit why he was sitting in front of the window in the first place. Immediately, he jumped down and prodded Fluttershy’s hoof, looking up to her pleadingly. “Oh, right, you’re hungry, aren’t you?” Angel nodded, his bottom lip trembling pleadingly. Fluttershy sighed. “Oh dear. You poor thing must be starving--” Loud and unrelenting knocking from the door cut Fluttershy off. The yellow pegasus looked up, pondered for a moment, and then looked down at Angel again. “I’m sorry, Angel, just wait a little while longer.” It was Fluttershy immediately turning away that kept her from seeing Angel’s pleading expression drop off his face like a mask, revealing the frustration that lay below it. Angrily he stared at Fluttershy as she unlocked the door. He wanted his salad, now! Quickly he hopped after Fluttershy to give his owner a piece of his mind - when the door suddenly swung open and hit the bunny rabbit squarely in the face. Fluttershy briefly looked towards where the door had crashed against the wall, but soon her attention was taken up by Spike, who stood in the frame with tears streaming down his face and his eyes swollen and red. He sniffed loudly, pulling up a thick drop of snot. “Fluttershy! They... they killed Twilight!” “What?” Fluttershy’s question was more based on surprise than consternation. She stared at Spike in disbelief, having difficulties to actually comprehend his words. “Spike, are you alright?” “They did it! They killed Twilight! I saw it!” Spike hollered, a new torrent of tears exploding from his eyes. Loudly crying, he walked inside, blathering on. “And then there was this huge stallion, he looked at me so weird and I was just, just so angry, and he looked at me and I spat fire at him, but he didn’t care and he grinned and just looked at me, and then there was this one pony who was completely made out of metal, and he--” “Oh dear. Spike, um, just calm down... please?” Fluttershy had no idea what the little baby dragon was going on about, but he was completely distraught. She softly closed the door, too distracted by Spike to see Angel slump down from the wall, revealing a perfectly bunny-shaped dent in it. “Why don’t you... go upstairs? Lay down for a bit and, um, we’ll talk later?” “B-But, they killed Twi--” Suddenly, Fluttershy embraced Spike. “Shhh, it’s alright,” she said, softly rocking the baby dragon back and forth. She honestly had no idea what she was doing, but it seemed to be the best reaction to Spike’s panic. Surprisingly, it seemed to work. Spike’s sobs grew quieter and although they didn’t disappear completely, at least his incoherent rambling did. Relieved by the baby dragon calmed down, Fluttershy let him go, put her forehooves in his shoulders and looked him in the eye. “Now, why don’t you go upstairs and just lay down for a bit? I’ll get the others in the meantime and then we can see what’s going on. Okay?” “Okay,” Spike sniveled, nodded to confirm his affirmation, and then turned around to slowly go up the stairs. When the door upstairs closed, Fluttershy gave a sigh of relief. That had been quite the surprise. Whatever could have put Spike in such distraught? His cries, that Twilight was killed, had shocked Fluttershy, but she couldn’t honestly believe that. This was Twilight they were talking about here! How could anypony honestly believe that she would just up and die? Angel, meanwhile, felt like he was just about to do that very thing. Every part of his body hurt, his bones creaked and his head throbbed painfully. Every movement let him feel new pains in areas the bunny rabbit hadn’t even known he could feel things. Slowly, he rose himself up, trying to avoid any pain as possible. Not that Spike would be able to do the same. That damn baby dragon was gonna get it! As soon as he could get up there, Angel would show this scaley purple punk just who he was messing-- And then the wall behind Angel exploded. The bunny rabbit could only give a yelp of surprise, before a huge piece of wall crashed down on him, followed by a gigantic hoof. Fluttershy turned around in surprise, crying out in shock as she stared in the hole of her cottage’s wall. A gigantic stallion, musclebound and furious, stood inside it, his gaze scouring the place. His shoulders heaved with every breath and there was a dangerous fire in his eyes. --- Elsewhere, Cyborg zapped Twilight back to consciousness. The revived unicorn gasped in immediate response, greedily sucking in all the air she could take in. This proved to be not a smart move as directly after, she bent over in a coughing fit. “Wakey-wakey, lady,” Jack said as he watched Twilight wriggle on the ground, caught between fits of coughing and exhausted wheezing. “It's time for a game of 40 questions.” “I... W-what?” Twilight looked up at the strangers through the tears in her eyes. For a moment, she just looked at them confusedly. Then her memories returned and somehow, Twilight managed to squeeze a shocked gasp between the coughing and wheezing. “Y-you!” “Yes, yes, me, us, you, the whole shabam.” Jack rolled his eyes and then knelt in front of Twilight's face. “Let's skip the whole introduction thingy, 'kay? Where's your dragon?” “D-dragon?” Twilight wheezed, her breathing slowly becoming calmer. “Spike?” Jack shrugged. “Sure, let's call him that. Now, Sunshine, where did he run off to?” “My na--” Twilight coughed, but that did not affect the rebellious look in her eyes. “My name... is Twilight.” “Like I give a shit. Again, where's that dragon?” Twilight opened her mouth, then paused and furrowed her brow. “Where? He's gone?” “Yes, thanks for catching up,” Jack answered, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Your playpet appeared out of I don't care where, saw you, had a crying fit, spit a bit of fire at my buddy and then ran off – and my squad member with him. Now, where the hell did that dragon run to?” Still confused by all of this, Twilight stared at Jack, unsure whether to nod, shake her head, or headbutt this stallion. “I... I have no idea.” Something clicked in her head. “And he's not my playpet!” Jack, however, had already stood up and turned to the others. “Well, that was pointless. Cyborg, stun her again.” Twilight's eyes were quickly redirected from the stallion's back, as the pony made almost completely out of steel began walking towards her. The sounds coming from his raised hoof caused Twilight to slowly crawl back. Suddenly, the third pony spoke up. “Nin. Nin, ninin. Nin nin ninin nininin.” It was lucky for Twilight that the steel stallion halted his movement, because she herself could only stare at the pony completely clad in black. “What? That's a stupid idea.” Twilight's stare wandered to the rude stallion. “Actually, the theory is quite sound, Commander.” Now Twilight found herself looking at the steel pony. Her mouth opened, but no sounds would come out of it. At last, something comprehensive made it past her lips. “What?” “Since when the fuck do you have an own opinion, tin can?” Jack ignored Twilight's question completely. “I do not. However, Nin's theory is scientifically plausible. My scanners pick up a resonance between this specimen and the morphic field in the atmosphere. If we are to assume she could manipulate the morphic field to tap into the local leylines, then it is very likely that she should be able to use her emotional connection towards the child draconus vulgaris to fold space-time for a relocation of either herself or it.” “What?” Twilight asked for a second time. “Soo... you're saying she can beam herself and us to Purple Scales and through that we'll be able to intercept Baldur on his mad hunt for dragonskin?” “What?” Now Twilight sounded quite alarmed. “Possibly so. It may even be possible to transport ourselves to the draconus vulgaris' location, regardless of its condition. So even if Baldur already succeeded in killing it, we could land right at the corpse and re-obtain the viking.” “What?!” “Well then, problem solved!” Jack gave a satisfied nod. “One question though, Commander?” “Yeah?” “Was it necessary to do this in public?” Jack looked around. Standing in the middle of a crossroad, the group was the center of countless ponies' attention. They all stared at them in disbelief, shock, several shades of fear and sometimes a hint of arousal. Jack turned back to Cyborg and shrugged. “Meh. Sometimes you gotta improvise.” Cyborg nodded calmly while his processors were running hot with the attempt to twist this answer into an acceptable explanation. Suddenly, Nin pointed at Twilight. “Nin!” Cyborg and Jack turned their head. Twilight had apparently decided to take care of matters herself and had risen up to her hooves. Her eyes were closed, her teeth gritted, and, most importantly, her horn was glowing brightly. “I suppose that's her tapping into the local leylines?” Jack asked as he gingerly pointed at the lavender unicorn. “Affirmative, Commander.” “Aw fuck,” Jack sighed in response. The very next moment, he jumped forward. “Alright you two, grab at something!” “Understood, Commander,” Cyborg replied and grabbed the librarian's tail. “Nin?” Nin inquired as he slid towards Twilight and grabbed her left forehoof with both legs. “Simple, really. We're gonna ride a unicorn!” Jack grinned and locked his forehooves around Twilight's neck. Twilight didn't seem to mind, or even notice for that matter. Her face was contorted in concentration and her horn glowing brighter by the second, started to pulsate – and with a flash, all four ponies had disappeared from the crossroad in the middle of Ponyville. Only to reappear at the door of Fluttershy's cottage. With a bright flash, Twilight and her uninvited company stepped back into reality. “Aw shit, my eyes! Again!” Twilight tore open her eyes and turned her head towards the familiar and unwanted voice. “What are you doing here?” She asked incredulously as she stared at Jack who rubbed his eyes with right hoof, his left leg still draped over her neck. “Taking advantage of you to find my squad member which I lost thanks to your dragon.” “My dra-- you're BLAMING me?” Twilight could hardly believe it. “You knocked me unconscious!” “Actually, Miss Twilight Sparkle,” Cyborg spoke up from behind her, “you were hit with an energy pulse which is designed to overload your sensory input and therefore temporarily shut down your higher cognitive functions.” Twilight now stared at him. “What?” There was a hint of pride when Cyborg answered. “It is much more sophisticated than a simple knock out.” Twilight just kept staring at him. Soon, however, she reminded herself that there were other matters she needed to attend to. She leaned forward, tried to raise her hoof, and noticed that she was unable to do so. She looked down. Still clinging at her leg, Nin looked up to her. His eyes had a serious expression in them, as he slightly squeezed Twilight's leg, nodded and breathed in before uttering his next words. “Nin.” Twilight tore her leg away from him and rammed her hoof on his face as she walked past him. “Can't say he didn't have it coming. That really was just lewd,” Jack grumbled. Ignoring him and the knocked-out ninja behind her, Twilight raised her hoof and knocked on Fluttershy's door. As she waited, she tried her best to stay calm. Alright, no reason to freak out. Just because you're suddenly surrounded by three strangers who zap you and then un-zap you, and talk about Spike could be dead doesn't mean that he actually is. It's not like this is frighteningly real for it to be a dream and these ponies are doing their best to freak  you out and this is getting really strange and I think I'm panicking, oh Celestia, I think I'm going crazy-- “Twilight?” The lavender unicorn looked up and saw Fluttershy in the door frame. The yellow pegasus gave a relieved smile. “It's you, Twilight! I knew that Spike must have just been in too much panic to understand what was happening.” “Spike!” The mention of her number one assistant reminded Twilight of why she was here. “Is he here? Is he alright? Did he get hurt?” Fluttershy raised a hoof to stem the flood of questions. “He's okay. Just a bit shook up, the poor. He's resting upstairs right now.” Relief swept over Twilight, carrying away any anxiety and worry that had buzzed inside her. Spike was okay, there was no reason to be upset. “Yay, hurray for Purple Scales! Can we get on with it now?” Well, one reason less to be upset. Twilight rolled her eyes and shot a withering look towards Jack, who completely ignored her. “So, toots,” he said. Fluttershy blinked and looked at him. “Um, do you mean me?” “No, I was talking to this particularly lovely hole in the wall.” Jack rolled his eyes “Of course you, you vapid--” “Fair Maiden!” A boisterous voice exploded from inside the cottage, ripping the rest of the sentence away from Jack's lips and carrying it deep into the forest where it remained unheard by innocent pony ears. Looking unexpectedly unsurprised, Fluttershy turned around at the call, Twilight looking over her shoulder while the three others spied through the hole in the wall. Sitting at a small table in the corner of the room was Baldur. Although the chair creaked worryingly under him, Baldur seemed to have found just the right way to contribute his weight across the wooden construct to keep it from breaking apart under him. The table in front of him was draped with a white, ornate sheet and on top of it stood a quaint tea pot, surrounded by fragile looking white cups. “This drink!” Baldur exclaimed, raising one of the cups. “I like it!” Baldur raised the cup even further, and then threw it down on the ground, shattering it into million pieces. “Another!” He didn't take note that one shard jumped up another time and leaped into Angel's salad. The bunny rabbit curled its lips, yet remained unable to do anything about it since every single one of his limbs was restricted by several layers of bandages. “In a moment, Baldur,” Fluttershy answered with a gentle smile. “In the meantime, could you make sure that Angel eats his salad? He's sometimes so picky.” The bunny rabbit shot a disbelieving glance in her direction. He tried to wriggle his arms, to no avail, his face expressing only one question: How the hell am I supposed to eat by myself like this? “As you wish! I shall make the rabbit eat his greenery!” “Um, Fluttershy?” Twilight asked. Fluttershy turned around as Baldur rose up from his seat, his forehooves crashing into the floor with a thunderous noise. “Who is this?” “Oh, that's Baldur.” Fluttershy smiled gently, while in the background, Baldur picked up the spoon from the salad bowl and offered it to Angel, who refused to open his mouth. The giant viking didn't take not that an unusual white piece was shimmering between the green leaves on the spoon. “he's a very nice stallion.” “Really?” Twilight looked past Fluttershy to watch Baldur impatiently prod Angel with the spoon, while Angel turned his head away more and more, annoyance and fear mirroring on his expression. “He seems kind of... strange.” “Oh, I understand what you mean,” Fluttershy nodded. Baldur now grabbed Angel's head with his hoof, turned it back and rose the spoon up. Angel gave a frightful cry, trying to shake his head violently, but couldn't escape Baldur's grasp. A broad grin was on the viking stallion's lips as he let the spoon shoot forward, straight towards Angel's head. It escaped his attention, which was solely focused on Angel's terrified expression, that a shard of porcelain fell from the spoon, just seconds before it was jammed into the rabbit's mouth. “But trust me, once you get to know him, you'll see he has some nice qualities.” “Sounds like code for 'I want his dick' to me,” Jack grumbled. Fluttershy's wings rose up immediately in response. Her head snapped to the right. “What?” She asked with a high-pitch voice. “Relax, you're wing-bonering all over the place,” Jack snorted as he walked through the hole. “Hey, Baldur!” Baldur turned his head, then grinned broadly. “Ah, Commander!” He ripped the spoon out of Angel's throat, causing the bunny rabbit to twitch quite unsettlingly. The spoon dropped from his hoof and back into the bowl. It escaped once more Baldur's attention that a piece of porcelain was still hiding between the green leaves of salad, or he would have watched more carefully how the spoon hit the shard, causing it to fly high up into the air. Angel, who was still recovering from the violation of his throat, looked up and stared at the white piece of misfortune, his eyes widened in terror as the shard reached its peak and then suddenly accelerated back down, towards him. A high-pitched shriek wanted to escape the bunny rabbit's throat, but stuffed as it was with salad, only a soft mumbling came over his lips as he skidded backwards. Only a moment later, the shard buried itself into the floor, the very place Angel had been only seconds before. Jack took notice of Angel's near-death experience. “What was the big idea, hm? Did you even think before running after that dragon? Or are you too retarded to do even that?” Surprise lingered only briefly on Baldur's expression. The following anger made itself much more comfortable. Twilight watched as the musclebound giant slowly walked up to Jack, unsure as to what to feel about the prospect of the rude earth pony being the victim of violence. Jack, meanwhile, didn't stop. Whether it was because of his confidence in his authority or because he had his eyes closed, Twilight couldn't tell. “I swear to God, everything you do causes nothing but trouble. Not that that makes you a special case in this collection of retards High Command calls my 'team', but that doesn't change that your incompetence annoys the piss out of me!” Baldur started to walk faster, now a murderous shimmer appearing in his eyes, but still Jack didn't shut up. “I know muscles are all you're good for, but at least learn to use them! Even Nin knows when to shut the fuck up, but you? You're just one big, retarded annoy--” Jack opened his eyes when a breeze rustled his mane. His jaw locked when he found out that the cause of said breeze was Baldur pulling back his left forehoof, a manic grin on his lips and a dangerous expression in his eyes. “Oh shi--” Boom! Jack hit the floor, just in the same moment Baldur's forehoof impacted with a white, furry form that had jumped up behind the commander. There was a loud crack, followed by one more as Baldur thrust his shoulder forward and twisted his foreleg. The furry thing immediately shot back and crashed against the cottage's wall, sticking there briefly, before it slowly slid to the ground, leaving a red trail behind. “Ha! Devilish beast! This was for Ser Bear!” Baldur released a thundering laugh, then turned to the cowering Jack. “My apologies, Commander! I did not heed your words as I was too busy planning the enactment of my vengeance upon this wretched little thing.” Baldur raised his blood-covered hoof and tipped it thoughtfully against his chin. “I think you spoke of my performance in the team?” “Uh... that's alright.” “Really?” Baldur furrowed his brow and knelt in front of Jack. “I'd hate to be of hindrance.” “Oh, I think that made more than up for all the trouble.” Jack gave a small, nervous laugh as he rose back up. Determined to let the discussion end there, he turned around and eyed his mysterious assailant. It was a rabbit. “Stubborn little bastards,” he mumbled. “And getting rather serious about taking us out, too,” Cyborg added as he walked into the cottage. Nin, nodding in agreement, followed him. Jack turned his head. “Took you long enough. What were you-- never mind,” he added as he saw Nin's and Cyborg's blood-soaked figures. “Did you take care of all of them?” “Of the assailants, yes. But my scanners are picking up more hiding in the nearby woodwork.” Jack sighed and massaged the bridge of his nose. “Alright, fair enough. Let's get started then. Cyborg, did you get the immigrant's DNA sent to you during the briefing?” “I did, Commander.” “Good. I want you to make a careful scan for any traces of it. Keep it in a 5 mile radius. Branch out for matches with lesser percentages as well, High Command said that the being was highly reproductive after all.” “Understood, Commander.” Cyborg straightened his spine, his metal horn rotated slightly and his red eye flashed. A second later, a low humming sound came from the metal stallion. Jack gave a satisfied nod. “Finally we're getting somewhere. Now if we could just not be interrupted for about five minutes, that'd be--” “Um, excuse me?” “... great.” With a rolling of his eyes, Jack turned around to face Fluttershy. The yellow pegasus gave her best to not stare too blatantly at the killed rabbit that leaned on her wall, or on the blood on Cyborg's metal skin and Nin's clothes. Instead, she tried to keep her gaze focused on Jack, which proved to be not that easy of a task since he was staring right back with an annoyed expression. “Um, I don't mean to be rude, but... who are you ponies?” “Yeah, I'd like to know that too!” Twilight added as she walked up to Fluttershy's side. The shock from watching Baldur punch a rabbit across the room seemed to have subsided from both mares enough to give room for confusion once more. Or in Twilight's case, angry demand for an explanation. “And what is going on here anyway?”  “Hmm, right. You guys have no idea, don't you?” Jack put a hoof up to his chin, looking as if deeply lost in thought. “How should I put this... ah yes! That's none of your business.” Jack turned back to Cyborg, only to see Twilight appear before him with a flash. “None of my business? You knocked me unconscious and reanimated me in the middle of a street!” “Didn't enjoy that half as much as I hoped, believe me that.” “Your... whatever he is, ran after Spike and tried to kill him!” “Fiendish son of Yggdrasil has escaped me, with the usage of darkest magic no doubt,” Baldur growled. Fluttershy shot a quick glance towards the ceiling. “So, in short, you invaded my home, threatened my family, and kidnapped me for apparently nothing more than your perverse pleasure. And now, you're running around killing every rabbit in sight! So tell me one reason why I shouldn't turn you into an orange right here and now!” The inside of the cottage fell silent. Only the low hum from Cyborg was audible, as Jack and Twilight stared at each other, the latter furious and breathing heavily in anger, the former apparently speechless and overwhelmed. At last, Jack found his voice again. “What kind of fucked-up shit are you into?” Twilight's face contorted impossibly as it tried to express anger and bewilderment at the same time. “What?” “Turning others into oranges? Man, I've heard of all kinds of fetishes, but that really takes the cake.” “I--” “I mean, how do you even come up with that? You can't get there without some serious dedication to a really sick kink.” “That's not--” A soft touch interrupted Twilight again. She looked to the side to see Nin, who had placed one of his blood-soaked hooves on her shoulder. Understanding shimmered in the cloaked pony's eyes and he nodded gravely when Twilight's gaze met his. “Nin.” “Now that,” Jack pointed towards Nin, “that is some good advice.” The absurdity of the situation made Twilight's head swivel again, but she fought down the enclosing nervous breakdown with impatience. She shoved Nin's hoof away, trying to not mind the remaining bloodstain too much, and tried to speak up again. “Listen here--” She didn't succeed. “Are you mad, wench?” Baldur's voice boomed through the cottage. “We are not senseless slayers! Those furred beasts deserved the bloody death thrust upon them! Why, as evidence for our righteousness you only need regard--” “Angel!” Fluttershy's cry turned the head of everypony, safe for Cyborg. The yellow pegasus stared at her animal companion in horror, her mouth agape. Either the shock of the sudden violence caused against his kind had made the bunny rabbit gasp or Baldur's invasive spoon had been jammed further than initially believed. In any case, Angel now lay on his back, his legs and arms twitching, while a green salad leaf was sticking half-way out of his mouth, his face having turned distinctively blue. “Nin nin,” Nin mused as Fluttershy ran over to Angel's side. “What? No, that's just silly,” replied Jack. Not listening to either of them, Fluttershy knelt beside Angel and softly raised his head with a hoof. “Angel, dear. Can you hear me?” She didn't get a reply, safe for a desperate gasp that sucked the salad leaf in even further. “I think that's a 'no'. Then again, I don't speak 'dying rabbit' so what do I know.” Jack shrugged. Twilight, who had watched Angel worriedly, turned her head. She opened her mouth, without a doubt to rebuke the rude earth pony, but Fluttershy was quicker. “Please! You have to help him!” She looked at the three strangers pleadingly, tears shimmering in the corners of her eyes. Nin and Baldur looked at Jack. Jack shrugged again. “I don't see what we can do to help.” Twilight drew her head back in surprise, when he looked at Fluttershy tenderly and smiled gently. “Sometimes, you just have to let go. Sometimes, life just happens.” “Nin.” “And giant vikings that choke your bunny rabbit with a spoon full of salad.” Fluttershy stared at them, desperation and tears dancing in her eyes. “Angel...” she mournfully whispered, rocking the bunny rabbit softly in her arms. Twilight had to suppress a sad snivel and walked up to her trusted friend, putting a hoof on her shoulder. “Commander.” Cyborg's even voice tore Jack's gaze from the sad scenery. He sighed in relief when he saw that the steel stallion had regained his attention for the surrounding scenery again. “All right, Cyborg, what do you have?” “I detected the immigrant's DNA structure. However, I also have to confirm your suspicion. There are several other life forms surrounding the immigrant's position. I counted seventy.” Jack gave a huff of frustration. “Great. Any idea what we are dealing with here?” Cyborg pointed at the dead rabbit at the wall. “Seriously? Those guys?” Jack let his stare wander between Cyborg and the dead rabbit. “Affirmative, Commander.” “So those killer rabbits aren't just natives? Wait.” Jack furrowed his brow. “Killer rabbits...” Suddenly, he groaned. “Aw fuck. I think I know what the immigrant is.” “There's something else, Commander. Thanks to our encounter I could pick up some DNA samples from the other life forms. Through those, I retraced the immigrant's reproduction partner.” “Wait, you found the immigrant's fuck buddy?” “Affirmative, Commander.” “Well, where is this partner?” Once again, Cyborg didn't give a vocal answer and pointed his hoof again. Jack followed the direction. He looked directly at Fluttershy. “Woah, wait. Her?” Jack gingerly pointed at Fluttershy himself. His face twisted as unwanted pictures entered his mind. “I mean, she already struck me as a bunny lover, but not in a literal sense.” “Incorrect, Commander. I mean the life form behind her.” “Behind he-- you mean the bunny rabbit?” “Affirmative, Commander.” “Oh Angel.” Fluttershy softly shook her head, a tear rolling down her cheek, just before Jack rudely shoved her to the side. “Out of the way, woman, I got business with this choking bunny!” He growled. Ignoring Fluttershy's shocked and Twilight's furious look, he grabbed Angel, with surprising ease for hooves he noticed, and rose him up to his eyes. Angel didn't move. “Hey, still there?” Jack rudely shook Angel back and forth, but the bunny rabbit still did not move. Jack pulled him even closer, squinted his eyes and then sighed. “Damn, he's meat.” “What the hay do you think you are doing?” Twilight snapped. Jack didn't pay any heed to her. He dropped Angel and walked away. “Oh no, not this time,” Twilight growled and went after him. Not noticing her, Jack rejoined his three team members. “Has the fair maiden's familiar perished?” “Yeah. A rabbit choking on salad.” Jack couldn't help but grin. “That's at least new.” Cyborg raised his again glowing hoof “Shall I then, Commander?” Jack breathed deeply and then nodded. “Yeah, let’s do it.” Suddenly, someone grabbed him from behind and swirled him around, bringing Jack face to face with a now very furious looking Twilight. “You listen to me now, mister! You're going to explain to me now who you ponies are, why rabbits are getting killed around you, and what it even is that you do.” The unexpected fury of the lavender mare sent Jack into a shocked silence. Only for a few moments though. “Sorry, Sunshine. I’d just love to waste my time with explaining everything to you, but I got a date.” “If you think I’m just going to let you walk off again, then you’re sorely mistaken!” “Oh yeah?” Jack said, just before his head got blasted into pieces by Cyborg’s laser.