Fillydelphia University

by Tom From Myspace


2: Well This Should be Fun

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!” The girl screams at the top of her lungs.

“Who the hell are you?!” You cover your eyes with your hand.

She begins throwing the nearest objects to her at you, most of them bouncing off you rather harmlessly. One in particular collides with a certain area, causing you to double over in agony. Maybe keeping that baseball you found on that shelf wasn’t your best idea.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN TRIXIE’S ROOM!?” She demands.

“Who’s Trixie?” You respond, out of breath and struggling to stay upright.

“You’re standing in her presence, knave.” She says, almost growling.

“Well excuse me for existing. Just tell me what the everloving fuck you’re doing in my room.” You respond, still in extreme pain. You are on your knees, looking up at her with pain and anger in your eyes.

“Trixie was assigned to this room.” She arrogantly puts her hands on her hips and raises an eyebrow.

“Was Trixie given a towel, too?” You snip.

“Trixie was coming out to get one. Trixie also thought that people still knew how to knock.”

“Oh, don’t you put this on me. Nobody told me I was getting a roommate.” You say, attempting to stand.

“A likely story.” She huffs.

Dat ass, bro....

NOT NOW.

“Fine. Trixie pities you, being so easily hurt.” She quips.

“Pardon my anatomy.” You mumble.

You hear movement as you collapse back to your knees. You assume that this girl Trixie was getting her clothes or a towel, but then see an ice pack float up to you encased in a sparkling purple aura.

Magic? Well...this should be fun.

I know. Think of what she could do with it!

I said not now!

AH HA! YOU DO WANT HER!

I didn’t mean it like that- oh forget it. Just shut up.

You grab the ice pack and make your way over to your bed, where you pull yourself up. You manage to come to a sitting position and hear the door to the bathroom slam shut. You immediately apply the sweet, cold relief to your sore groin. Letting your mind begin to clear from the haze of excruciating pain, you begin to wonder why nobody gave you a heads up on this. It’s your right to know who you get stuck with for the next three years, isn’t it? Conveniently, a knock comes at your door.

“It’s open.” You announce.

The door opens, and in comes yet another female. She has dark purple hair with a magenta-pink stripe coming down the middle. She wears a violet sweater and knee length skirt. She’s holding a clipboard and pen. You notice a slight blush on her face.

“Hi Twilight. What brings you to my neck of the woods?” You ask in a flat tone.

“Um, a-am I interrupting anything?” She asks, sounding embarrassed.

“What?” You look around.

It was just your luck that you wound up sitting near a tissue box and a couple of your magazines. That combined with your hands in your crotch to hold the ice pack could certainly give the wrong impression. Now it’s your turn to blush.

“What? No! No, heh, uh it’s not that.” You chuckle nervously, “It’s this.”

You hold up the ice pack to show her. She lets out an audible sigh of relief, and the blush fades.

“I guess you met your roommate?” She asks.

“No. I’m just sitting here with an ice pack because I’m kinky like that.” You say, your voice dripping with sarcasm.

“You don’t need to be rude, you know.”

“Look, so far in the five minutes I’ve been back here, three things have happened. I found out I have a new roommate, I found out she was a girl in the most awkward possible way, and then I got hit in my nether regions with a baseball,” You explain, “So sorry, but I think it’s understandable.”

Twilight giggles, and you scowl.

“Right, sorry. It’s not funny.” She says, still giggling.

“I assume you showed up to tell me that I no longer have my own room.” You say.

“That’s right. But I see you found out already.” She smiles.

“Yeah. Speaking of which, you got any magic super painkillers or something? I can’t really move because this hurts so much.” You say, wincing a bit as you move the ice pack.

“Well...I do know this one spell...” She says.

“Use it. Please.” You beg.

“Okay.”

You close your eyes, and wait for her to do her thing. The pain suddenly leaves your body all together, and you open your eyes. Thankfully, your lower half is still there. No matter how often she helps, Twilight’s not one you trust with magic around you. Not since the incident with a case of firecrackers.

“Thanks Twilight.” You smile.

“It was nothing.” She smiles back.

“So how’s life with she-who-shall-not-be-named?” You ask.

“Ugh, why can’t you and Rarity just get over this?” She groans.

“How would you feel if Flash turned out to be seeing someone behind your back?” You raise an eyebrow.

“Point taken. But it was over a year ago. You two need to let it go.” She complains.

“Well that’ll happen someday. But not today.” You boop her nose.

Twilight frowns, but sighs in defeat. She turns to leave, checking off something on her clipboard.

“Well, that’s out of the way. I should get to class. Bye!” She says as she leaves.

Well. That was abrupt.

Wow, I had almost completely forgotten about the Rarity ammo I stockpiled!

USE IT AND I WILL END YOU!

HEY! It was a joke! Calm down!

You sit back on your bed, thinking about things. Twilight’s probably right. It’s stupid to hold onto a grudge for so long. Maybe it’s time to make amends. But then again, doing such a thing as Rarity did doesn’t really warrant easy forgiveness. You pull out your phone and flip through some of the pictures.

You know you’ll just be torturing yourself when you go far enough back.

I know

Then why do it?

Because...it replaces the heartache with healthy doses of rage.

Get over her, man.

Could you?

Yes. And I’m you.

You come to a few pictures along the camera’s timeline of a stunning girl in a white dress. They were buried beneath pictures of blackness and random things, seeing as the camera tends to have a mind of its own, but still there. Most people would say keeping pictures of your ex is pathetic or weird. But for you, they serve as a distraction. Whenever you’re dumb enough to bring the slightest part of the whole thing into your head, you just look at the pictures and try to remember the happy times you used to have. Then comes the rage. But you’d take anger over sadness any day. You come to a photo of the two of you sitting in a tree. It’s the only time you ever convinced her to actually come up into a tree, and figured you might as well document it. It’s probably the last time the two of you were seen smiling together. Not two days later did you find out that she had been with another guy for months behind your back.

Okay, turn off the phone.

But-

Listen, I know I don’t take things seriously all the time. But I care about you, bro. I don’t want you to keep living in the past. It won’t solve anything.

Okay.

Put away the phone.

Okay.

Somewhat reluctantly, you press the power button and toss the phone onto your pillow. You let out a sigh. For once you're actually not angry. In fact, you actually feel a bit sad. It was quite a while ago; Twilight was right about that. But it still hurts to think about. For some reason, you actually feel like the whole thing is your fault.

You good?

I’m good.

Alright.

Who am-

Hold that thought. Hot naked chick inbound.

You spy Trixie out of the corner of your eye as she returns from her shower. You really, really want to look, but manage to contain yourself. You can almost hear your future kids thanking you for that choice. You stare at the wall to avoid eye contact with any part of her body. You suddenly feel a glob of wet cloth hit you in the head, and completely obscure your vision.

“That’s to make sure you don’t peek.” Trixie snarls.

“Gah! You could’ve just said so!” You shout as you flail out from under her used towel.

Quick! Just glance at her!

No way! I like my face arranged like this!

Please? For me?

No. Well...maybe just a peek.

I love you.

In a lapse of better judgement, you look over at Trixie. You attempt to feign a glare, but ultimately fail upon viewing her as she is now. Instead you just stare. And stare. And stare some more. She isn’t naked, but she isn’t fully clothed either. She’s in her underwear, digging through her bags for something. You absentmindedly let out a whistle as you check her out, instantly drawing her attention to you. You hear a growl, and look up at her face. She’s blushing, but has a look on her face that says “You’d better get ready to die”.

“Trixie will give you three seconds to run before she hurts you.” She growls.

You blink, but scramble to your feet and make a break for the door.  Unfortunately, you trip and take a digger into the door frame. You pull yourself to your feet and touch your forehead. Thankfully, you’re not bleeding. You can hear giggling coming from behind you, and turn around to see Trixie failing to contain her laughter. You just stand there as she has her gigglefit, somewhat embarrassed about what just happened.

“You don’t still want to kill me, do you?” You ask.

“No, Trixie thinks that was punishment enough.” She replies, still giggling.

“Of course it was.” You grumble.

“Now are you going to stop ogling Trixie? Or will Trixie have to blindfold you?” She asks, folding her arms across her chest.

Did she just say something?

What? She said something?

“What?” You ask, looking back up at her eyes now.

She frowns, “I thought so.”

You watch as she uses her magic to grab a piece of cloth and brings it up to your face. Your vision goes black as she secures the blindfold tightly. A sharp pain in your torso suddenly has you on your knees and without any breath. You can hear angry mumbling from a couple of feet away. It seems to have only taken twenty minutes to get this girl to hate you and your guts. That’s probably some kind of record.

Smoooooth.

Hey, this is your fault. Fuck off.

You manage to get back to your feet after a few minutes, and start working to untie the blindfold. You’re actually pretty surprised that she went so far as to blindfold you. In fact, you’re pretty surprised that she actually has a blindfold. Who just has a blindfold!? Weird people, that’s who.

You manage to get the infernal thing off after a good five minutes, and look over at a now fully clothed Trixie. She’s wearing a light blue shirt and a pair of jeans and has begun the process of annexing the drawers. You take this slightly safer chance to check her out once again. If there’s one major positive to your new living situation, it’s the hot girl unpacking across from you. But if there’s one major negative, it’s the hot girl unpacking across from you. Something tells you that your life just became a bit harder with her around; call it a hunch.

As you grow increasingly bored, you begin to ponder bugging one of your friends to do something. Rainbow’s asleep, so she’s out for now. Twilight’s probably in the library. But honestly, she can be more boring than watching paint dry half the time. What about AJ? Maybe she’d be up for doing something. So, without further thought, you get up and begin searching for Applejack.