Rainbow forced her wings down as she lay on the bed, her eyes wild. She was waiting for Applejack’s cues, not quite trusting her own judgement in this situation.
Applejack cleared her throat and looked back at the pink mare to the side of her. “Sorry about that. Dashie’s a little... eager.”
Dash blushed at hearing her marefriend use her nickname, even though Pinkie always used the same one. It set parts of her mind working on things she shouldn’t be thinking about. “So—” she coughed when her voice cracked and started again. “So... what now?”
“Now, we’re gonna see if we can help Pinkie figure out what she needs to do to get Twilight back.”
“So... what should I do?” Pinkie asked, still snuggled up next to Applejack. Applejack was no Twilight, but it felt good to be held right now.
Applejack pressed a hoof to her forehead. “Well, first of all, if you two are gonna make it work, we’re gonna have to teach you there’s times you can’t just ask your marefriend what to do. You need to do it. Say... if Ah were Twilight, what would you do?”
“I would wait for you to tell me which game we were gonna play!”
“Now see here, that’s exactly the problem. Ya need to take some initiative if ya wanna have a real relationship. If she were here, right now, what would you want to do to her?”
PInkie scrunched up her face in thought, puzzled. “But she’s not here... is she? Where did you hide her?”
Rainbow barked out a quick laugh, holding up a hoof. “Applejack... you need to think like a Pinkie if you want to teach a Pinkie.”
Applejack shot her a withering look. “Right then, wise-acre, how would you do it?”
Dash turned to Pinkie, ignoring her marefriend for the time being. “Pinkie, pretend I’m Twilight; I just got here. What are you going to do?”
Pinkie disentangled herself from Applejack, staring intently at Rainbow. In the space of a few moments, her face took on a look of wild joy. She coiled her back legs and pounced, toppling Rainbow onto the ground with Pinkie kissing her excitedly.
Rainbow lay there dumbfounded at the speed with which Pinkie had acted. Finally, after a minute of being peppered by kisses, she found enough breath to speak. “Okay! Okay, that’s enough for now.” She snuck in a quick kiss on Pinkie’s nose. After that display, it was hard not to reciprocate at all. Applejack shot her a warning look. The pegasus grinned back sheepishly as if to ask ‘What can you do?’
Pinkie obligingly let her up, smiling a shy little smile. “That was fun! Can we pretend Twilight is back some more? I like that. I miss her...”
Applejack grunted from the other side of the bed. “Okay, what did that prove besides Pinkie likes to play pretend? We already knew that.”
Rainbow Dash licked her lips, stiffening when she caught herself—and the look Applejack was giving her. “Well, now we know why it worked for so long; Pinkie likes playing, and Twilight wanted it because... uhmm... of reasons?” She deflated as she realized just how little they really knew about why Twilight was doing what she was doing. “I got nothing...”
“She never wanted me to use her real name while we were pretending...” Pinkie said, deflating. “It was okay,” she hastily added, “but it always felt a little... a little...” She harrumphed and tapped the side of her head with a hoof. “Like she didn’t want to be there with me? Do you think that maybe... maybe she didn’t really like me?”
“Now, Ah’m sure that ain’t right. Ah mean... Ah don’t rightly know for sure... Well, okay, she didn’t like to have you call her Twilight... did she say your name? Ah mean... Dash can be a bit of a screamer—”
“AJ!” Dash interrupted her, sporting a furious blush.
“Aw hay, that was kinda personal, sorry...” Applejack trailed off. “Ah just meant... maybe she likes you fine... but she doesn’t like being... her?”
“That’s silly! Why would she not like being herself? Twilight is the bestest pony I know!” Pinkie exclaimed, trying to encompass her whole room with her hooves, before adding a guilty look towards Rainbow Dash. “...Sorry, Dashie.” She wrapped her forelegs around herself, as if by doing so she could hug the sad right out of Twilight. How could she possibly think she wasn’t the best ever?
The pegasus simply shrugged, “S’okay, Pinks, she’s your marefriend after all.”
Applejack chuckled at that exchange. “Yer a little biased, but Ah get ya, Pinkie. Here’s the thing, maybe... she needs you to step up and show her just how ‘bestest’ she is.”
Pinkie nodded enthusiastically. “Okay! ...How?”
“That’s easy.” Dash leaned over and nuzzled Applejack’s neck. “You just do all the little things that make her feel awesome.” She moved up to an ear only to be swatted away by an orange hoof.
“Not now, Dash,” the farmpony groused, embarrassed that Dash would even try to go for the ears when they had company.
Rainbow reached down and nipped at Applejack’s neck. “Actually, I think now’s great. I had to watch you two earlier. Let her watch us a bit. Might give her the right idea.”
Applejack bit back an angry retort, her eyes darting to Pinkie, who was watching with fascination. “Ugh, fine. But you keep those hooves above the waist, you hear? We ain’t here to give Pinkie a show.”
Rainbow nuzzled Applejack under her chin, grinning all the while. “Hey, s’like you said. Just showin’ Pinkie what to do.” The pegasus lifted her head and gave Applejack a little peck on the lips. “No point in being embarrassed now, right? I mean, she and I made out, then you kissed her; having her watch isn’t as bad, is it?” Rainbow fluttered her eyes at her marefriend playfully.
Applejack opened and closed her mouth several times, though if it was to answer or just a gasp that never quite escaped her lips was hard to tell. “Ah... Ah suppose not. Just don’t be mean, Dashie...” Dash laughed lightly, taking Applejack’s mane in her mouth and tugging. “Ah! ‘Taint right getting a mare all riled up when there ain’t nothing she can do about it...” She gasped anew as a wingtip grazed her cutie mark. “Dangit, Ah said nothing below the waist!”
Dash murmured something that might have been an apology around a mouthful of Applejack’s mane. She spat it out, nipping Applejack on the shoulder. “You said no hooves, AJ.”
“Ya know what Ah meant!”
Pinkie watched the marefriends kiss and nuzzle, growing ever more confused. It was clear Applejack was enjoying the attention, but there was no move to begin anything else. Applejack seemed to be trying to distract Rainbow by biting at her wings, but Rainbow kept shifting away; it was very odd. Twilight would have gotten the costumes and crystals out ages ago. “Um... girls, when do you... you know... play?”
Dash unclamped her teeth from Applejack’s ear to answer. “Well, when we get to that, we get to that, but sometimes this is all we do. AJ and I can spend all day just teasing each other. First one to give in and ask for more usually does what the other wants, unless what the winner wants is to do what the loser wants.”
Applejack nodded fervently, trying not to go mad under the ministrations Dash was inflicting on her ears. “It’s kind of an ebb and flow, Pinkie. When we first started out, it was all about who was on top. Now it’s just as much about who gets to be below.”
The pink pony leaned closer, trying to see exactly what Rainbow was doing. “Um... can I try?”
Dash dropped the ear again, chuckling. “Okay, but with who?”
“Both of you, silly!”
Applejack recovered enough to give Pinkie an amused look. “Sug, Ah know you spend a lot of time messing around with Twi, and Ah’m sure it’s adorable. But me and Dashie.. we play a little rougher. So howsabout we start you on something a little more your speed before you jump right on the bull?”
“Yeah, Pinks! Did you really think you could handle me like that? C’mon, I’m awesome, just ask AJ!” Dash fluffed out her wings, arching her back to demonstrate her point.
“Handle you, eh?” the farmpony said with an unimpressed gaze. “Well, you just volunteered, Miss Cocky. Pinkie, lessee what you got, but remember, Twi ain’t got wings so yer gonna hafta focus on the other ways to get her heated.” Applejack paused, eyeing the two mares intently. “Remember, yer just trying to tease, not end up tangled in the sheets. Understand?”
Rainbow planted a big kiss on Applejack’s lips. “AJ. S’cool. I got this. She caught me by surprise with the wings before. I’ll be fine.”
She turned back to Pinkie. “Lessee here... ‘Pinkie, I missed you. Let’s go play dressup!’”
Pinkie giggled uncontrollably. “Was that supposed to be Twilight? Pfffthahaha!”
Dash folded her forelegs in front of her chest, sticking out her tongue at Pinkie. “Everypony’s a critic.” She rolled her eyes, finally giving up and laughing as well. “Fine, I won’t try to imitate her. Just scoot that pink butt over here and show me how you plan to make that mare yours.”
Pinkie stared at Rainbow, apparently deep in concentration. She began muttering in agitation.
Rainbow waited patiently for Pinkie to make her approach, but quickly grew exasperated. “Um... Pinks, everything okay?”
‘No! It’s not... you’re not purple enough! Can’t you be less you and more her?” Pinkie spat out, genuinely seeming upset by Dash’s less-than-purple complexion.
“So first you mock my acting talents, and now you want me to be more like Twilight?” Rainbow replied, not sure whether to be amused or offended.
“Not act like... you’re bad at that... earlier I could see her; it made me so happy. Now it’s just... you. I want you to be her again... Here, let me get out one of the costumes. That might make up for you being so blue...” Pinkie scrambled out of the bed and ran to the closet.
“Hey!” Before Dash could start voicing her annoyance she felt a hoof on her wing and looked over to see Applejack shaking her head.
“Let it go, Sugar.”
“Do you want to be Captain Sparkle or Princess Sparkle? Or m-maybe Sir Sparklelot?” Pinkie asked from the closet. Even from that distance, it was apparent her voice was shaking.
Applejack got up and made her way over to Pinkie, wrapping her forelegs around the pink mare. Pinkie had been clutching one of the costumes to her chest, silently weeping. “Sug, it’s okay. Put the costume down.”
“But... I want her to be here...”
“Dash ain’t Twi; she still won’t be Twi in that getup. That was your whole problem, remember? Ya got sick and tired of making love to a costume.” Applejack laid a hoof over Pinkie’s. “Those things in there ain’t Twi either. You’re aiming to get her to be herself around you. So put it down, and let’s try something else. Okay?”
Pinkie took a deep breath, then hung the costume back up and closed the closet door. “Okay.”
They made their way back to the bed, Applejack keeping a foreleg around Pinkie the whole time. They both sat down next to Rainbow. “Now, maybe you wanna say something to Dashie?”
Pinkie nodded, sniffling. “I’m sorry you aren’t purple enough.”
Dash threw a foreleg around Pinkie herself. “That’s okay, Pinks. I guess I’m not very purple at all.” They all lay back together, Dash and Applejack holding Pinkie on either side. Pinkie laid her head against Dash’s pelt, weeping softly. Dash just held her close, Applejack smoothing her hair as a mother would with a foal. In time the sniffles stopped, and Pinkie looked to either side of her, smiling again.
Dash smiled back, reaching up to tap Pinkie on the nose. “Feeling better?”
Pinkie sighed wistfully. “Yeah... I just wish I could see her now. I miss her so much! That little crease in her forehead when she gets frustrated, those funny little crinkles around her eyes when she laughs...”
Applejack tapped her gently on the shoulder to get her attention from wherever she’d just gone. “Ah been meaning to ask you about that... what’s stopping you from going to see her? She didn’t make you promise to stay here, did she?”
“Well, no, but Rarity asked me to be ready with a welcome home party,” Pinkie replied sadly.
Applejack nodded in understanding. “Gotcha, so you promised Rare, then.”
“Um... no. She promised me she would bring Twilight home, and asked me to get the party ready for when they got back.” Pinkie scratched her mane, agitated. “But that was a few days ago!”
“So, you didn’t actually promise to stay here?”
Pinkie looked at Applejack, annoyance etched on her face. “Applejack, I told her I would wait; not everypony goes looking for reasons to squeak out of a promise, Miss ‘Ah’ll tell you at breakfast’!”
Dash laid a hoof on Pinkie’s shoulder. “Whoa, slow down Pinks, AJ’s just trying to help!”
Applejack waved a hoof in dismissal. “Nah, she’s got me cold, Dashie. But Ah didn’t mean ya should break your promise or anything like that, Pinkie. Ah was just thinking... you can throw her a ‘welcome home party’ in Canterlot just as easily as here. Canterlot is her home too, right?”
Pinkie opened her mouth, about to issue another rebuttal, but closed it with a snap. “It is! Oh, I need my cannon, and my balloons! I can throw her two parties!” She hugged Applejack in excitement, kissing her on the lips. “Thank you thank you thank you! Oh, and you too, Dashie.” In a flash, she was gone, leaving a small Pinkie-shaped puff of smoke in her wake.
Dash stared at Applejack, grumbling. “Didn’t even get a kiss goodbye. Worst threesome ever!”
The puff of smoke swirled and Pinkie jumped back out of it, wrapping Rainbow in her hooves and planting a kiss on her lips as well. “Forgot something! Bye!”
Applejack smiled slyly at her marefriend. “Better?”
Rainbow had no response at first, finally blushing lightly. “Eh, ten out of ten for style, at least. She’s gotta work on her execution.” She kissed Applejack on the lips, looking at the door. “I hope she got some idea from that. Seems like all we did was confuse her and make her cry.”
Applejack nuzzled Rainbow under the chin, eliciting a nicker in response. “Sug, cryin' was just what she needed. She ain't a dummy; a little snuggle time and a nudge in the right direction was the best we coulda done for her.”
Rainbow grunted sourly, sullenly looking at the floor. “Still would have been nice to have a little sexy time...”
The farmpony kissed Rainbow on the lips, her voice dropping low. “Close the door. I don’t think Pinkie will mind much if we borrow her bed; she’ll be busy for a while.”
Rainbow’s eyebrows rose, and she smiled wickedly. In a flash the door was closed and locked, and two mares ducked under the covers.
“Mrs. Cake! Have you seen my—” The entire structure shook from a loud explosion, followed by a cloud of confetti. “Nevermind!”
Cup Cake poked her head into the room dubiously to find Pinkie furiously packing streamers, balloons, and very nearly Pound Cake, who had wandered too close, into her bag.
Pinkie waved a hoof at Pound, using the other one to stuff various party supplies into the bag. “Pound! You stay here!”
“Pinkie? Are you all right?” Cup asked.
Pinkie whipped her head back to smile at Cup as she ran furiously around the room gathering items, bouncing all the while. “I’m great, Mrs. Cake! I have to pack, though—” She stopped in midair, frowning as she remembered something vital. “Ohmygosh! Sorry, Mrs. Cake. I know it’s short notice but I need to go to Canterlot to throw Twilight a ‘welcome home to Canterlot’ party! Do you think you and Mr. Cake will be okay without me for a few hours? Maybe a day?”
Cup waded through those sentences in surprise, but seeing Pinkie so happy and... well, Pinkie, she didn’t want anything to alter that state. “Pinkie, you take as long as you need. We’ll be fine.”
“Did I hear an explosion?” Mr. Cake’s voice called from the kitchen.
“It’s fine, hun. Pinkie found... whatever that was. She’s taking some personal time, so I’ll open tomorrow.”
“Thanks so much!” Pinkie swept up the twins, kissing Pound and then Pumpkin and hugging them for all she was worth. She set them back down, grabbed her suitcase, and ran off to the train station.
“What was that about?” Mr. Cake asked his wife as the pink blur zipped out of the bakery.
“I think... she’s okay now.” She nuzzled up against her husband, smiling.
Donut Joe’s was one of the few establishments in Canterlot which remained open day or night. The popularity of the shop had skyrocketed since a chance visit by a unicorn filly who had wandered into the shop one day asking for something to eat while she studied. This was later followed by a visit from Princess Celestia herself, who presented Joe with a plaque declaring his donuts to be the official pastry of choice, and exclusive contracts for the catering of sweets to all of the castle’s soirees.
Even taking into account all the business the castle provided, however, things were usually quiet in the shop in the wee hours of the morning.
Which made it all the more surprising that it wasn’t.
“Please?”
Joe was stunned; not half a minute ago he’d been holding a pleasant conversation with one of the guard veterans, which was always a welcome break from making donuts, when the door had slammed open and a pink pony had stormed in. She had a look of determination on her face that had made him uncomfortable as she stalked up to the counter.
Her first words were: “Joe! I need one dozen sprinkled and I need to know where Twilight is!” which sounded more like a demand than a request. The purple unicorn had been a regular for as long as he could remember, but this mare he had only seen once before. Wait... yeah! She was at the bakeoff too. Right, the hyperactive one who had accused everypony else of ruining the entries...
Still, during those times, she had been laughing and smiling with her friends. The change in her demeanor had thrown him for a moment, making him fumble for her name. He wanted to facehoof when he remembered. Pinkie Pie; her name has her coat color. You’re getting old, Joe. He could hardly be blamed, though; the mare before him was hardly bubbling over with joy. He had never seen her this focused. She looked like a mare on a mission. Whatever that mission was, he wasn’t about to get in her way.
“A dozen sprinkled coming right up,” he said good-naturedly. “Though I’m afraid I don’t know where Twilight is. Haven’t seen her in months.”
It had been enough to crack the spine of whatever had been fueling the pink pony, and turn her into a blubbering pile of misery.
“But I need to find her! Otherwise I’ll never be able to throw her a welcome home party!”
Being able to lend a sympathetic ear was a job requirement for anypony in Joe’s profession, supplemented with some rudimentary advice that had earned him a lot of thankful repeat customers. “Welcome home? Funny, I thought she lived in Ponyville now. Have you tried the castle? If she’s in Canterlot, odds are she’s in there.”
“Well, she does live there, but she lived here too, and she’s here now. So I came here to throw her a ‘welcome home to Canterlot’ party.” She looked doubtfully at the castle. “So she hasn’t been by at all? I was hoping she would have, or even that she would be here...”
Joe scratched his chin. “Well, no. But she wouldn’t have had to leave the castle for one of my donuts. We make daily deliveries to the whole castle.”
“Oh... okay. Thanks, Joe.” She laid some bits on the counter, shoving the donuts inside her mane.
The bell above his door chimed, and a familiar voice called out from the doorway. “Morning, Joe!”
“Morning, Spike.”
Spike walked up to the counter, nodding to Pinkie Pie as they passed each other. “Morning, Pinkie!”
“Morning, Spi—Spike?”
The dragon did a doubletake. “Pinkie?”
Spike scratched the back of his head in consternation. “Pinkie, why are you here? I thought you were waiting in Ponyville?” Spike looked her up and down, noting to his relief that her mane was not flat—but neither was it quite as bouncy as normal, which was concerning.
Pinkie shook her head vehemently, patting her handbag with a hoof. “I’m here to throw a ‘welcome home to Canterlot’ party.”
“For Twilight? But this isn’t her home!”
“But it used to be, and now she’s back!” Pinkie insisted, stomping her hoof on the ground.
Spike began to wonder if one of them wasn’t making any sense. He decided to concede the point before he became convinced it was him. “Okay... fine. But I don’t think Twilight is ready for a party yet. Last I knew, she was with Princess Celestia—”
“Princess Celestia! Got it!” she said, mere seconds before she ran off at breakneck speed towards the castle.
“Huh. Okay, maybe that’s best, then...” Spike muttered as he watched her speed off. Maybe Twilight wasn’t ready for the pony about to storm her way back into her life, but he doubted anypony was ready for that anyway. “Go get her, Pinkie,” he muttered.
“Spike? Did you get the donuts?” a feminine voice inquired from the doorway.
“Shoot! Coming, Dancer!”
“—and the roadway repairs will be paid for by this quarter percent increase on the estate tax as detailed in Proposal Forty-Two—”
Princess Celestia was getting impatient. The presentation had been going on for an hour straight and there was still no explanation forthcoming about where the original roadway budget had gone to begin with. She was still trying to decide if this stallion was either merely incompetent, or a thief. “Gentleponies, we’re going to have to table this discussion until a full investigation of your office has been conducted.” Her ear twitched as she heard what sounded like a platoon of guards charging down the hallway.
“But Your Majesty—”
Celestia amplified her voice to be heard above the protesting pony. “Enough. Something is going on.” Sounds of conflict were coming closer; she could hear a mare’s laugh and several stallions shouting orders to cut somepony off. The mare’s voice could be heard occasionally demanding to be taken to see somepony, but Celestia could not make out who that was. The noises changed from the din of conflict to barked orders for search patterns. All went relatively quiet for a time.
“Where’s Twilight?!”
Celestia’s brow furrowed as she tried to locate the source of the voice. It was familiar, but its owner should have been in Ponyville. “Who is asking?”
A loud commotion was heard outside the throne room, and the door was shoved wide open. The voice of Lieutenant Bulwark could be heard from the throne room entryway as he galloped up to her dias, dashing off a quick salute as he skidded to a halt. “Your Majesty, a pony was seen jumping out of the donut delivery truck and has since evaded capture by three full platoons! We need to secure the room and find the invader to detain—”
Celestia held up a hoof, shaking her head as a small smile graced her lips. “That’s either a changeling infiltrator or Pinkie Pie. In either case, I do not think you’re equipped to handle her.” She called out to the room in general, hoping that by calling to the intruder their response would help her pinpoint them. “Well, is it you, Pinkie?”
“If I say yes, will you tell me where Twilight is?”
Celestia finally located the source of the voice. Pinkie was suspended from the ceiling by a black rope, clad in a black jumpsuit, smiling hopefully down at her. Looking up further confirmed her suspicions; the rope hung from an open grate in her ventilation ducts. At various locations, she could see tears in the jumpsuit from her guards’ attempts to repel the invader. She made a mental note to call upon Pinkie the next time her guards needed a good shakedown to test their readiness. “Come down, my little security risk.”
“Okey dokey...”
“Your Majesty! I strongly advise that you allow us to detain her until we confirm whether she poses a threat to castle security!”
Pinkie climbed down from her rope, her gaze flicking between Bulwark and Celestia’s faces. “Um... could you give me a big cell? I need room for the decorations.”
“That won’t be necessary, Pinkie.” Celestia said, laying a hoof protectively on the earth pony’s shoulder. She turned to her guards, who were currently eyeing Pinkie, getting ready to lay down their lives if necessary to defend their princess. “Lieutenant Bulwark, please inform the rest of the Guard that this was a planned drill. All of you will be commended for your fast reaction time.”
A quick salute followed. “Yes, Princess!”
“Princess, about the roadway funding—”
Celestia whipped her head round to face the pony who had been wasting her time when he should have been accounting for the lost budget, which she was beginning to suspect had been embezzled after all. “Lieutenant, please escort this pony out of my throne room. I need to confer with the Element of Laughter about her findings during this drill.”
“At once!”
“But the roadways—”
“—will be taken care of by your temporary replacement. You are being placed on paid suspension pending an investigation. Lieutenant, send somepony ahead to lock down his office. Oh, and once my little plant here tells me how she slipped past you all, I will want a full report on how you will prevent this from happening again.”
Celestia turned back to Pinkie Pie. “Well, that was exciting. What would you think about being a security consultant?”
Celestia was drifting off as she led Pinkie to the dining room. It wasn’t polite, she knew, but Pinkie Pie had managed to string together as many words as some of the dignitaries she dealt with used on a good day, in half an hour. She stifled a yawn before it hit her lips, her fatigue from a long night with Twilight weighing on her.
“—and a big room to fit all the decorations and presents, because everypony needs to feel welcome when they come home, even if it’s to their old home and not their new home—”
Celestia nodded her head, though the words had ceased to have meaning ages ago. She thought back on her conversation with Twilight the night before, trying to somehow reassure the unicorn that she was wrong about herself, cursing herself for a fool for not seeing this sooner.
How many times had she gently dissuaded proteges in the past? She should have been able to see the signs of a crush by now. A few very special ones had been granted leave to court her, but those had been well into adulthood.
None had been Twilight’s equal, and as she watched Pinkie perform an impromptu dance routine on a nearby flower stand she had to suppress an irrational surge of jealousy. It wasn’t fair to Twilight or Pinkie.
“Princess? Yoooohooo!” Pinkie smiled brightly as Celestia turned to her. “Hi! Welcome back! I was just wondering how much farther till we see Twilight, we’ve been walking a long time now.”
“Forgive me, Pinkie Pie. I was... woolgathering.”
“Wool? Are you like a sheep? That explains why you’re white!”
“Well, somepony is in better spirits.” Celestia smiled down at her subject and unwitting romantic rival. A foolish notion, she supposed. She had lost the war for Twilight's affections long before she had known that there was a battle to be waged. Conceding victory was likewise pointless, as Pinkie herself had planted a bright pink flag on Twilight’s heart without ever knowing there had been a prior claim.
“Yeppers! We’re going to see Twilight, I can’t wait to tell her how much I missed her and I love her and how she needs stop worrying so much. She’s a great big silly head!”
“And the party?”
“I’m going to make sure it’s the best party ever! A welcome-back-home-in-Canterlot party!” Pinkie halted mid bounce and put a hoof to her chin. “Doesn’t sound catchy enough...” She shrugged and resumed her bouncing. “Oh well...”
Celestia chose her next words carefully. There was so much she wanted to say to this mare, beginning with apologies and ending with sheer resentment. “Could you promise me that you’ll take good care of her? She is very dear to me, and I want what is best for her.”
“Pinkie Promise! Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.” Pinkie landed on her face a split second after she finished; making the motions of a Pinkie Promise mid-bounce apparently wasn’t easy.
Celestia watched the motions, bemused. “Twilight and the rest of your friends have all mentioned this. You consider this promise sacred in a way, don’t you?”
Pinkie nodded furiously. “Nopony breaks a Pinkie Promise. If you break a promise you’ll lose ponies’ trust, and losing a friend’s trust is the fastest way to lose that friend... forever.” Despite that word being spoken in a normal tone of voice, it mysteriously echoed throughout the hallway.
Celestia blinked rapidly at the solemn intonation. “Forever is a long, long time, Pinkie. I’ve been alive long enough to have seen a small glimpse of it, and nothing truly lasts forever. So when you make a promise to me, bear that in mind. I will remember if it is broken for long after you pass on. Do you promise me, upon my life?”
Pinkie stopped bouncing and looked at her. She gave Celestia a single solemn nod. “I promise I won’t hurt Twilight.”
"Good—"
"And I never break a promise to my friends."
“I believe you,” Celestia said finally, taken aback by the uncharacteristic display of seriousness. “You consider me a friend, then?”
Pinkie looked at her as if she had sprouted an extra horn. “Well, duh! You’re the princess! You’re like, everypony’s friend! But you’re also Twilight’s friend, and that makes you even more important!”
It was Celestia's turn to nod solemnly. “I’ll be glad to count you as an important friend as well. Which is why I am going to make you a promise in turn: I’m going to hold you to your promise, for as long as you live."
The room seem dimmer somehow, and Celestia’s expression turned hard and cold. "Furthermore, I pledge on the sun that if it is broken you will know what it means to displease a goddess... forever.” Again the word echoed ominously, and in the distance, thunder clapped. She blinked, taken aback by the ferocity in her own voice. “I... My apologies, that came out wrong—”
“Soooo, can we see Twilight now?” Pinkie asked, apparently not having noticed anything amiss.
Celestia stared at Pinkie, not quite sure what to make of the unflappable mare. “She’s very important to you too, isn’t she, Pinkie?”
“She’s the most important. It’s like... when she’s not happy, the sun isn’t as bright. Things don’t taste right, like everything is stale and sour.” She stuck out her tongue. “But I bet you know what that feels like.”
Taken aback, Celestia did not respond right away. Twilight had told her all about Pinkie’s peculiarities. Was it possible Pinkie could sense what she was feeling? “Why would you say that?”
Pinkie cocked her head to one side, studying Celestia’s expression. “Well, you and Luna had a fight, and you were apart for a long long time. I bet you missed her a whole lot! I mean... maybe you were okay some days, but then you go to ask her a question, and she’s gone! No hugs, no little fights, just gone! I can’t even think about how many days you went through. But she came back, and you were happy again!”
In a surprising move, Pinkie nuzzled Celestia briefly. “Twilight’s only been gone a couple days now. I’m hoping my days can stop soon; it’s hard being sad.” She stared off into the distance. “That’s all I used to be, once. I didn’t know there was another way to be. Then I came to Ponyville, and I made lots of friends, and then Twilight and I—” She stopped, her voice wavering. “But then she left. I don’t want to be sad anymore!”
Celestia was shocked beyond words. In her heart of hearts, she had wanted to find some fault in Pinkie, some reason to justify stepping between these two. In that moment, she set all of that aside with a heavy heart. The connection these two had forged, damaged though it was, was a necessary and good one for them both. The important thing now was to bring these two wounded souls together so they could bring each other peace once more. She leaned down and nudged Pinkie softly. “And you don’t have to be. Twilight has been working through some problems, but she wants to see you again.”
There was a horrendous sound, and Celestia looked down in alarm to see Pinkie had inflated to twice her normal size, blowing up like a balloon. “Really? Really, reallyreally? She doesn’t hate me? She wants to see me? When can I see her?! Is she hiding behind you? Twilight? Twiiiiilight! Come out come out wherever you are! Where is she hiding? Please show me where!” Pinkie furiously darted around the room, searching under carpets, potted plants and tapestries. She lifted Celestia bodily and searched under her as well. “I can’t find her anywhere!” She set Celestia down and got down on her knees. “Please, where is she? I give up!”
“She’s still sleeping, Pinkie. The only reason I am already awake is to raise the sun. She had a rough night and is sleeping in,” Celestia said, omitting that she had been up with Twilight and was equally exhausted. They had at last arrived at the dining room. “Why don’t you go inside and decorate? It’s just about time to wake her—”
Pinkie threw open the doors, whipping a dozen donuts, a party cannon and a suitcase out of her mane. “I’m on it!”
Celestia’s eyes boggled as she watched the dining room transform from a sparse but tastefully decorated dining room into a mass of streamers and balloons. A cake was produced from thin air and placed in the center of the table. She resolutely turned and walked back in a direction where things made sense. “How...” No, that way lies madness.
Twilight felt the nudge and swatted at it, hitting nothing but air. “Hmmm.... Not now, Spike. Good dream... Go make breakfast, please. My head is killing me.” The nudge returned, followed by a gentle nuzzle under her chin to lift her head out from beneath the covers. “Noooo! No sun, not yet.”
“I’m hurt, you always said you loved the morning sun.”
Twilight’s eyes snapped open. “Spike! Why is Celestia here? Princess, did I miss a letter? Why am I...” She rubbed her head slowly, letting consciousness ease its way into place. “Right, Canterlot. Spike’s not here. Good—” she yawned, stretching as she sat up. “—morning, Princess.”
Celestia wanted to nuzzle her faithful student but hesitated, going with a smile instead. “Good morning, Twilight.” She lifted a glass of water from the nightstand, bringing it within reach of Twilight’s hooves. “Dreaming of Ponyville, were you?”
Twilight nodded. “Simpler times, back when I hadn’t decided to try to date one of my best friends only to leave her sad and lonely because I am a huge idiot.”
“Simpler, perhaps. But surely she was worth taking a chance on?” Celestia winced inwardly; taking chances and getting burned because of it was not a good topic right now.
Twilight looked down at the bed, her ears drooping. “I never really gave her a chance though. I kept part of me hidden away, hoping I was giving her enough, but she needed more... I couldn’t give that to her. I’m a coward, Princess.”
“You are not a coward, Twilight.” Celestia held back another urge to hug Twilight. She needed to be strong for her student. Conflicting emotions would only confuse and hurt Twilight more. Celestia would have to remain at a distance; a teacher and confidant, aloof from her own turbulent feelings about the mare. “You’re the bravest pony I know, and Pinkie knows that, too.”
Celestia whipped the blanket from Twilight’s shoulders. “Come, it’s time to get up. Breakfast is being laid out now.”
Twilight shivered, getting up from her warm and cozy bed. “Okay, Princess.”
They left the room, Celestia turning to her protege to ask a question. “You know, you’re going to see her again very soon. What will you say to Pinkie when you see her?”
“I thought ‘sorry for everything’ would be a good start.”
The princess laughed. “Surely not for everything. Pinkie was very happy with you until you left. Maybe ‘I’m sorry I got scared and ran instead of talking to you?’”
“‘Sorry, I’m too scared?’ ‘I really love you but I’d rather run away than talk to you?’ That’ll go over well...” Twilight sighed and hung her head. “I don’t know if she’ll even forgive me.”
“Oh? Yesterday I asked a pony very dear to me to forgive me for a slight I committed against her some... ten years ago now? That seemed to come readily enough.” Celestia, without even thinking, extended a wing to draw Twilight close. She looked at it in surprise, then carefully drew it back to her side.
“You didn’t even know what I was doing back then, you didn’t make a mistake... I did.” Another sigh escaped Twilight’s lips. “As usual.”
“Oh, yes. You left her, even when it broke your heart, because you were certain it was the only way to put an end to her sadness. Quite a crime.” Celestia sighed wistfully. “You know, I was speaking to somepony recently about painful separations, and forgiveness. I banished my own sister to the moon, and she forgave that. Do you think Pinkie would do less?”
“Probably not,” Twilight admitted. “But I hurt her. I wanted her to be happy, but I just ended up making it worse. I’m not sure I can forgive me for that.”
Celestia shook her head sadly, reaching down to nuzzle Twilight. “Enough self-recrimination. What will you say? What will Pinkie want you to say?”
“I wish I knew, Princess,” Twilight replied, her head hanging low.
“Well, give it some thought. You may be seeing her sooner than you think.”
Luna yawned as she entered the dining hall. “Good morning, sis—” She stopped, staring at the pink pony aiming what appeared to be artillery in her direction. “Assassin! What have you done with my sister?” She reared up, ready to level a counter attack, when the pony laid her weapon down and charged. “Stay back! I am warning you—”
The next few moments were a blur for Luna. When the world had finished spinning, Luna stared up at the smiling pink face in shock. “How did you—Oh, hello, Pinkie!”
“Hi, Princess Luna! Sorry if I scared you but this going to be a surprise party and you’re being very loud! Can you be quiet and hide for when Twilight comes in?” Pinkie got up off the toppled princess, helping her to her hooves.
“A surprise party?” Luna asked, her eyes lighting up. “That does sound like fun! Where shall I hide?”
“Um... can’t you just turn into smoke or something?” Pinkie eyed the princess doubtfully, trying to find someplace in the room to hide her.
“Well, yes. But is that not cheating?”
Pinkie thought for a moment, shaking her head. “I don’t think they have rules for princesses. Besides, it will be more fun if you swoop out like whoosh and say ‘Welcome home!’ while I pop out of the cake!”
“Very well. Is there anything else I should be aware of?” Luna inquired, picking up a donut in her magic and taking a bite.
“Well, no, but I could use your help with something.” Pinkie gestured to the room, frowning. “Surprise parties are supposed to be dark, but I can’t seem to find any way to close the curtains in here—”
Luna grinned, her horn glowing with a dull purple light. “You require darkness? We shall provide.” As Pinkie watched in delight, the light retreated away from her horn as if fleeing from it. In seconds they were in the pitch black of a night with no moon to brighten it. Looking up, Pinkie could see a starfield on the ceiling. Even the light from the chandeliers had been snuffed out in accordance with Luna’s wishes.
“Wowee! That was great! But now we need to hide your horn or they’ll see you!” Pinkie was already looking around for a tablecloth to cover Luna’s head.
“Fear not! I can maintain this while in mist form.” She allowed the spell to end, and the room was once again filled with bright cheery sunlight.
“Okey-dokey, so you’ve got the lights, I need you to do that again when I give you the signal!” Pinkie began making a complicated set of motions which appeared to be emulating a chicken dancing. “Got it?”
“Perhaps it would be easier to give a simple nod of your head?” Luna suggested, amused.
“Well, duh, but where’s the fun in that?”
“Of course, fun. Shall I repeat the signal with you?” Luna raised herself up on two legs and attempted to emulate the flapping motions with her forehooves.
“No no, more like this.” Pinkie said, performing the dance once more.
Luna could now see the pony had her forelegs tucked in to emulate wings. “Hmmm, I see. Perhaps I could flap my actual wings?”
Pinkie shook her head rapidly. “No, that’s cheating, you have to use your legs or it doesn’t count.”
Luna cocked an eyebrow rakishly, flashing her teeth at the earth pony. “We could have sworn you said there were no rules for princesses...”
“There are for this! Now watch.”
Pinkie demonstrated again, and Luna did her best to copy the movements. After a few moments of this both mares were giggling madly at how silly they looked.
Twilight had been silent the rest of the way to the dining hall, hopefully thinking of what she planned to say to Pinkie. Celestia let her ruminate for the moment, having other concerns. She had seen Pinkie decorating at a rapid rate, but she was not certain if even that whirling dervish of energy could have the hall ready in the time she had been gone.
Arriving at the door, Celestia held out a hoof to stop her protege.
Twilight, who had been walking forward rather mechanically, stopped abruptly as she ran into the princess’s leg. “What is it, Princess?”
“Just making sure you don’t bang your horn against the door... again.” Celestia dropped her hoof and quickly made a plan to stall Twilight for a few seconds longer should the party pony require more time. “Tell me, have you thought of what you’re going to say to Pinkie when you see her again, yet?”
Twilight nodded hesitantly, “I think so.”
Celestia smiled in approval, glad that she’d had a chance, and hoping she would not forget the moment she saw Pinkie. She looked at the door, then Twilight, realizing there was a flaw in this plan. “Twilight, can you give me a moment? I asked the cooks to prepare something special this morning, and I want to make sure it’s ready. If it’s not, we can pop into the kitchen and get some donuts until it’s done."
If Twilight thought her question suspicious, she did not say so. “Okay... I’ll just... wait right here, then.”
“It should take but a moment,” Celestia said, as she quickly opened the door a crack and peeked inside. The scene inside made it hard for her not to burst out laughing, but it wouldn’t do to give everything away before Pinkie had had her surprise. “Lu, are you... is everything ready?”
On the other side of the door, Luna and Pinkie were having a dance off. Luna whipped her head to look at the door as Celestia’s words registered. “Just one moment!” She looked around for Pinkie, only to see her scrambling into a hatch in the top layer of the cake. So much for signals. Shaking her head, she quickly recast her blackout field spell, removing all of the light from the room. “Ready!”
“Luna? I thought you said you asked the cooks to prepare something special?” Twilight’s voice could be heard asking from the other side of the door. Luna could barely make out a squeal of excitement coming from inside the cake.
“About that...” Celestia’s voice replied, throwing the doors open wide. “Well, see for yourself.”
“... it’s dark,” Twilight said, bemusement clear in her voice. “I know what a light diffusion spell is, Princess... what’s so special about this?”
Luna ended the spell just as Twilight curiously stepped into the room, allowing the light to flood back in. “Welcome home, Twilight Sparkle!” she shouted at a volume that was almost, but not quite, deafening.
Twilight stared at Luna for a moment, eventually breaking eye contact to regard the various decorations. The hatch on the cake opened, and from it, a pink projectile launched itself towards the stunned unicorn. “Welcome ho—?” were the only words that could escape Twilight’s confused lips before they found themselves pressed up against Pinkie’s own.
When the kiss finally ended, she stared up in surprise at the one pony she had never expected to see at that moment. “P-Pinkie?”
“Welcome home,” the earth pony murmured, nuzzling her head into Twilight’s chest.
“Home?” Twilight repeated in confusion. “Pinkie, what do you—”
The earth pony took one of Twilight’s hooves, pressing it to her pink-coated chest. Twilight could feel the steady beat of Pinkie’s heart. “You’re home now. Please don’t leave anymore.”
Twilight’s eyes teared up, and she had to choke back a sob. “Pinkie...” She flung her forelegs around the earth pony, who readily let herself be embraced. All planned speeches, pleas for forgiveness, everything left her mind. “It’s good to be home!”