//------------------------------// // Chapter 1: Testing, Testing // Story: Conversations with a Draconequus // by ObeySaturnGod //------------------------------// "Now, there are a few things I need to explain to you before we really start off on our grand adventure." Discord strolled through his home at a leisurely pace as if he were walking through a castle's garden and not a barren wasteland. Celestia followed behind and to his side, wary of any traps he might have for her. Even though he had said he wanted nothing out of the agreement, she couldn't in good faith hold him to his word. Trickery came to him as easily and naturally as breathing, and she wouldn't let her guard down as long as he held her here. The image of the demon he had become flashed in her mind, and she cursed herself for being caught so unaware. "Firstly, everything will take place in this humble abode of mine. No matter where you think you may be, you're not in the real world, and you won't be leaving here until you've decided you've had enough for the day." "You mean to say I can come and go as I please?" She asked in a suspicious tone. "Of course. If I kept your mind here for as long as it took to make you understand me, your physical form would collapse well before we made any real progress, not to mention the effects of prolonged separation between mind and body, and I'm sure neither of us wants that." Celestia doubted her unrestricted freedom, and his supposed worry for her even more, but his reasoning did make sense. Even without knowing the slightest bit of what was to come, it couldn’t possibly be over in a day or two, and time would continue to march onwards, both in Discord’s world and hers. He continued with his explanation while idly picking at his protruding fang with a sharp claw. "Secondly, you'll be exploring your own mind as much as mine, perhaps even more so." "I take it you have a reason for this." Perhaps he didn’t have a reason at all, she wondered as she spoke, it could all have been a ploy to toy with her, but she kept this to herself. "I do, but I'd like to hear what you think the reason is first." Celestia eyed him warily, taking a small step backwards. "Why?" "Call it simple curiosity,” he replied, closing the gap between them with a single, long stride. “Humor me, if you would be so kind. Heavens know I've been in desperate need of it ever since you locked me away in here." She let the jab go unnoticed and tuned him out. Why would he have her go through her own mind when he held the answers she sought? The possibility of this all being a game was obvious, but she reluctantly acknowledged that this could also be part of the larger picture and she was being overly cautious, though the idea of being overly cautious with Discord was hard to believe. But as to the matter at hand, a storm of reasons tumbled end over end as she searched until she found one that seemed to fit. "You want me to reevaluate my actions from your point of view, is that it?" Discord’s eyes lit up in glee and he clapped his hands in mock celebration. "Oh, I knew you were a bright one when I first laid eyes on you. Not literally bright, mind you, even if you do have a tendency to light up like a candle. I'm glad to see the years haven't dulled that sharp intellect of yours.” He suddenly reached out in an attempt to pat her head. Celestia quickly pulled back in revulsion and he continued on unabated. “Yes, that is exactly the reason. I could tell you all about chaos and the like, in fact I most likely will as we go along. However, unless you put it into practice you'll never fully comprehend what it means, and I can't think of a better backdrop to use than your own memories.” He stopped and turned on her, his smile containing a dangerous new gleam to it. “Well, that’s not exactly true. The real truth is that we could get far more reliable results if instead of relying on millennia old memories, we used real ponies as our test subjects.” “You know I will not agree to that.” He groaned in disappointment. “And we could’ve had so much fun, too. Well, it was worth a try.” Something about what he said sat uneasy with her, though she couldn't quite pinpoint what it was that upset her. The thinly veiled threat that suggested he planned to escape didn’t worry her, he was still trapped here and he wouldn’t be getting out anytime soon as long as she remained on guard and alert, but something in the manner he spoke still upset her. There was a disturbingly large amount of situations that had thrust her into this perturbed state, but the more she tried to discern the cause behind them, the less it made any sense to her. Her whole reason for being here had been based on nothing more than the unexplainable feeling of something terrible approaching, but for the first time it occurred to her that there was the chance of it being a self-fulfilling prophecy. "Thirdly, and most important of all, you cannot exit in the middle of a session.” Once again he demonstrated his ability to rapidly change moods, as he spoke in a gravely serious tone at odds with the cheerful way he suggested he be set free a few seconds earlier. “This is extremely delicate and advanced magic I'm handling to not only keep you in my realm, but to also unlock our minds so we may examine them in depth. You yourself know just how exhausting it was to simply transport your mind here, so I’m positive you can sympathize with just how much energy I'm exerting to keep everything in check. If you suddenly exited without my knowing, I shudder to think what kind of trauma the disconnection between our minds would cause." She took everything in and nodded in solemn understanding. Discord may have been tricking her with the other rules, but she believed he wasn’t joking with this one. Even now, Celestia could feel the effects of her consciousness being separated from her body. There was a slight sluggishness to her movements, and she could feel the beginnings of a headache in the back of her head. She didn't relish thinking of what would happen if their minds were suddenly cut off from one another. The results would most likely be worse than fatigue or a migraine, to put it lightly. "Well," he said, stopping in a location that might as well have been where they started from, "that should just about cover the major issues we'll have to concern ourselves with. There may be a few more hidden away but I'm sure they'll only be minor inconveniences, nothing to worry about. I suppose now would be a good a time as any to ask me any questions you may have." "You still haven't told me what it is that you want from me in exchange." "As I said before, the opportunity to spend time with my favorite princess is all I need from you." The thought of being his favorite anything disgusted her and frankly she found it to be an insult, but she kept her head cool and let it slide as she had with so many of his previous comments. "You also mentioned gaining something you've wanted for a long time as well." "Yes, it seems I did, but trust me when I say it's beyond your comprehension as of now. If I were you, I wouldn’t worry my pretty little head about it." She had been analyzing everything he told her as he said it, and it all seemed to fit in place, save for one small fact. If what he had said about their minds disconnecting was true, and by the dull throbbing in her head she believed it was, then he had put himself at just as much risk, perhaps more considering that he had no physical body he could retreat to. If something were to happen to his consciousness in here, he might never recover from the shock. In the worst case scenario, if the blow were serious enough, it might even kill him. Why then, if there was such a risk to his well-being, would he have accepted her offer? He had asked for nothing in return, simply stating that he only wanted to have fun with her, and a specific something that he had desired for some time, though what that was she had no idea. Not to mention if she so felt the desire, she could simply leave his realm and forget they had ever made an agreement in the first place and leave him to his stone prison for eternity. The mere thought of backing out on her word made her uncomfortable and it was certainly not something she would be doing, but Discord couldn’t have known that, so it must have remained a threat he had to worry about. The more she examined it, the more the deal seemed to be weighted to her side. It made Discord seem a bad negotiator at best and downright foolish at worst, two things she would never associate with him. Unless, she knew, there were shadows at work behind the scenes, and she would expect nothing less from her old enemy. He must have ulterior motives, she thought to herself. The only question is what his goal is. She found herself thinking back to what he had said of the certain thing he had wanted so badly for so long. A hint of doubt mixed with regret reared its unwelcome head. What was this mysterious object, if it even was tangible in the first place? Should she have tried to discover more about it before making the deal? "Princess! Are you still with me?" Discord waved a paw in front of her and snapped his fingers, urging on Celestia’s return to reality. “Don’t tell me you’ve given up already, we haven’t even begun!” The doubt that had slowly crept into her faded as she realized he was staring at her intently, waiting for a response. “Yes, I’m fine,” she said after clearing her throat. “Forgive me, I was merely lost in thought.” “A trait that runs in the family it would seem.” “Excuse me?” “Well,” he said loudly, disregarding her completely and bringing his hands together in a booming clap that echoed across the empty plains, “shall we begin? I do believe the time has come to dive into that wondrous collection of happy, orderly memories and have some fun with them.” She considered pressing him further on the issues that had raised a red flag, but it would do her no good. He was tight lipped enough as it was, and if she tried pressing him for more information, he might shut her out completely. Besides, there was no guarantee that even if he did tell her anything it would be the truth. More likely it would be a lie that only served his purposes while trapping Celestia in an even worse position. It was a treacherously thin sheet of ice she was balancing on, and the slightest misstep in any direction would send her plummeting into the freezing waters below. As much as it unsettled her to wait in this situation, she would have to bide her time in the hope that he would shed light on his motivations on his own terms. “Yes,” she said, eager to begin if only so she could return home faster. “Then the only matter remaining is to choose a memory, and I do believe I have the perfect one.” Before Celestia could say anything, Discord vanished, and with him the table and its tea set. She stood alone, but the emptiness lasted only a few seconds, as all around her the landscape began to shift and change. A rumbling from beneath her caused the ground to shake, staggering her as she fought to stay upright. Grey stone walls rose up and surrounded her on three sides while a large window took up the fourth. Out of the cloudiness beneath her came polished wood paneling, clinking and clacking as they packed in together and laid the groundwork of the room that was slowly beginning to take shape. Small desks started to appear in rows, all of them facing the wall opposite the large window. A large chalkboard hung on the wall with ‘Welcome Back!’ written on it in white chalk. On the other walls, various shelves appeared that held backpacks, lunch bags, and various other supplies intended for students. A larger one near the window held rows of books. Posters were plastered everywhere, reminding everyone to eat their vegetables, brush their teeth, and to practice their magic daily. Celestia looked up at the ceiling and found it rose into an upside down cone, paneled by more wood of a darker variety than the floor. A large arched door near the window marked the exit. Celestia had an idea of where she was, and when she gazed out the window, it confirmed her suspicions. Below her lay Canterlot, alive and bustling with sophisticated ponies going about their business. The sun sat high in the sky, and from deducing its position, Celestia surmised it was somewhere around noon. Across from the tower she inhabited was the main Canterlot castle, the highest tower in the city, and if she was in the secondary tower, that meant she was in the school named in her honor. “What could he possibly want from here?” Celestia spoke to herself openly, unconcerned about anyone catching her in the act. Memory as it was, she couldn’t have any effect in the events that occurred, and more likely than not the ponies here wouldn’t be aware of either her or Discord’s presence. The door near the window opened, and Celestia stepped into the room, accompanied by a small, purple filly trailing behind her. The filly was nearly shaking in excitement, and Celestia smiled down at her new student. “Now Twilight, remember, school doesn’t start for another two weeks, so I don’t want to catch you in here before then. If you want to check a book out, I’ll be happy to accompany you to the library so you may read in your room in the castle.” “Of course, Princess Celestia! Whatever you say!” Twilight stopped her bouncing just long enough to skim through a few of the books on the shelf before eagerly exploring the rest of the classroom. Celestia watched her and smiled while Celestia watched the both of them and wondered what Discord wanted her to do. “Chaos, chaos…” Celestia needed to do something chaotic, something that Discord would do. She went through a number of possible spells, but for each one, when she went to cast it, a mental block prevented her from doing any harm to either herself or her student, despite neither of them being real. No matter how much she forced herself, she simply could not hurt the innocent memories. The sound of a low groan came from behind her. She turned to find Discord covering his face with his hands that, combined with the groan, showed just how much faith he had in her. “Honestly, Celestia, how did you ever live for over a millennium like this?” He uncovered his face and continued pleading with her. “You have no sense of adventure or excitement! You must learn to let go of your inhibitions and bask in the mayhem you can create with a single conjuration.” He strode to a desk and opened it with a creak of its hinges. “Take this, for example. There’s so much you can do when you catch a pony unsuspected, it’s not even funny!” He held his hand out and in a flash a wiggling snake appeared. He deposited it in the desk and shut it, and with a snap of his fingers, the young Twilight Celestia had been watching throughout her memory appeared in front of it. Urged on by Discord’s magic, Twilight opened the desk and screeched as the snake snapped at her. She fell backwards and ran out of the classroom as fast as her growing legs would allow, leaving in her wake a silent alicorn and a draconequus laughing so hard that if it kept up, he would break more than a few ribs. “When, when I said it wasn’t funny, I meant-” he managed to choke the words out between his raging laughs, “I meant it was hilarious!” His fit went on and on, and just when Celestia was about to kick him back to his sense, he stood on shaky legs and wiped tears from his eyes. “Oh my, I haven’t had fun like that in quite a while!” He chuckled a few more times and finally composed himself. “Well Celestia, I think we can return now. I’ve seen all I need to see, and you have an idea of how to go about the whole chaos business, though please, work on the actual practice of it.” He snapped his fingers and the tower gradually faded away, the stone walls and wooden desks slowly ebbing out of existence, until it disappeared and they were left standing in the lifeless wasteland once more. The wooden table that was apparently the only piece of furniture Discord felt necessary for his home stood in-between them, the two tea cups still sitting exactly where they had been left. They stood opposite each other, and just as Celestia was about to speak, a blinding flash of pain struck her head like a blow from a hammer. She clutched her head in her hooves and had to manually control her breathing to stop herself from hyperventilating. Her vision started to blur when she saw what appeared to be Discord supporting himself on the table. "Here, Celestia," he said, offering her a cup with his paw while clutching the other with his claw, "this will ease the pain and make your transition back to the physical world easier on the both of us." He wasted no time in drinking his, obviously seeking much needed relief from the same pain Celestia was in, though it seemed to her that his pain was much more severe. She hesitated for just a second, but a sudden jolt of pain through her head made her grasp the cup with her magic and take a tentative swallow. Almost immediately she felt the iron clamp around her temple loosen its grip, and with another drink, it was almost as if she had never been in any pain at all. With half of it gone, she set it down on the table and watched quietly as Discord gulped down his own tea. It appeared he was having less luck than her. He rubbed the bridge of his nose while drinking from the cup, his eyes closed in a futile attempt to deflect the obvious pain that ravaged him. He wasn’t even bothering to use his magic as he did before when he drank the cup instead of the tea. He knelt on one knee in front of the table, and as a result he and Celestia were nearly on the same eye level, though he still had a few inches advantage over her. The seconds stretched out as she searched for something, anything to say to him, but her wits fled her and she could do nothing but wait for him to compose himself. She avoided looking directly at him as he struggled against the pain, and for a fleeting moment felt a twinge of pity for her old enemy, but it was gone as quick as it had come, leaving her to wonder if she had felt it at all. "I apologize," he said when he had recovered enough strength to speak. He put the cup down and raised himself off the ground with as much dignity as he could muster, though by the way his eyes were narrowed and his eyebrows furrowed, the tea had been of little help. "The first time is always the hardest, as our minds must adjust to the other. In time, after we've gotten used to the process, it should become easier." "Yes...” Celestia stared down into her cup, and the troubled face of a white pony broken apart by ripples gazed back at her. The mare in the cup had no crown, her horn was the length one would expect of an adolescent on the edge of adulthood, and her eyes lacked the wisdom only a thousand years of life could bestow. “It should become easier,” Celestia said gently, never taking her eyes away from the cup as its contents settled and became one solid reflection of the young mare, “but this isn't the first time, is it?" He regarded her for a moment with curious eyes before answering. "No, I suppose it isn't, but there is little difference between the first time and the first time in a thousand years.” He took an audible drink and mimicked Celestia, looking down into his cup as if he were searching for something he dropped. “Funny, the way you've behaved towards me, I thought you had forgotten." "A princess does not forget.” "Of course, of course, that crown on your head doesn’t symbolize royalty, no, it actually means you can hold a grudge against poor old me. You may want to recall Equestria’s history textbooks in order to amend that little mistake.” He shrugged, putting the matter to bed. “So you had me explain the inner workings of everything simply because you can't resist listening to my voice?" "I humored you." His lips turned upwards in the first smile since they returned from her memory. It wasn't a maniacal one, but more subdued in nature. Honest was the word that came to her, but honesty wasn’t something she could credit him with. Celestia briefly tried to recall a time when he had ever smiled at her in that way, but all she could find were instances of the diabolical one he wore whenever he was lying or plotting. "And here I thought you had lost all emotions other than being woefully serious.” His smile grew ever so slightly. “Are you ready to go back now?" "Yes." She wanted to leave immediately, to return to Luna, to review everything that had happened, but most of all to escape this new Discord she was talking to in an almost joking manner. It was almost as if he were trying to make friends with her. Never before had Discord acted like this, and if he were to somehow get on good terms with her, it would make it that much easier for him to deceive her. "Then you may do so, after I have my final say.” In an instant, his smile and friendly manner vanished, replaced with a visage stonier than the one chiseled into his physical body. “This was a simple test to prepare the both of us for what’s to come. You saw how short our stay was, and how utterly exhausted the two of us were. I won’t insult your intelligence by insinuating you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, but it bears repeating in simple terms. If you cannot handle what I am going to put you through, your mind will be so crippled and broken it will never heal to a thousandth of a fraction of what it once was. If that happens, every breath you take, every second you continue to exist will be a hell the likes of which you never thought possible. You will beg for death to come, and if you are lucky, you will receive it before your agony overtakes you so completely death becomes nothing more than an unobtainable dream.” Celestia lowered her head and thought in silence. No matter how badly she had wanted to tell herself it wasn’t the case, she had known it to be true all along. As Discord said, she wasn’t foolish when it came to her intelligence, only her actions. She couldn’t hope to deny the insanity it took to even consider continuing her meetings with Discord, much less the complete disregard of caution to seek him out in the first place. A more rational being would turn back now and count themselves lucky to have survived. Right this instant, Celestia didn’t feel rational. She didn’t know what compelled her to betray her kingdom, her subjects, and most of all her sister, but a spark had been lit inside her that now roared and scorched her with an intensity that would make Discord’s warning seem like the obvious choice between the two. Perhaps she would never know what drove her to this madness, but if she worked with Discord, maybe, just maybe, she would discover the source of the overwhelming obsession she felt with the chaos he controlled. “So I ask you Celestia, for the final time. Do you wish to continue this little fool’s errand to your doom, or would you rather forget all about our short time together and go back to your little castle on the mountain?” Celestia knew her answer and as such didn’t pay heed to Discord’s words, but even so, she caught the slightest goading in his voice, the way he seemed to challenge her to take him on even though he had just laid out in detail what awaited her if she failed. It had been at the back of her thoughts ever since coming to this forsaken land, but with his final words, it struck her. He wants me to fail. He had lied when he said he wanted nothing in exchange. Everything he had said to this point had been said in jest, an effort to catch her when she wasn’t looking. This was the strange desire he had, the one thing he had longed for ever since his imprisonment and wouldn’t disclose. Of course this was it, she had been right when she figured he would bargain for his freedom. In perfect Discordian fashion, he was going behind her back and using the most devious methods available to gain what he wanted while simultaneously punishing her for what she had done to him all those years ago. Now, with his plot exposed, she replied in the only way she could. “Yes.” His lips curled into the smile he so hoped to sport when she answered. “That’s all I needed to hear. I'll be awaiting your next visit with bated breath." "Until next time, Discord." "Until then." She closed her eyes and focused her magic in much the same way as when she arrived, however this time her bed chamber was her intended destination. Possibly because of the tea that had eased her pain, possibly because of the simple fact that she actually knew where she was going, it felt the slightest bit easier to concentrate on the endlessly complex spells that raced through her mind as she began her journey home. “Oh Celestia, I almost forgot! One more thing before you go!” Discord’s voice was so sudden and unexpected her thoughts nearly tripped over themselves and stopped the process, but with a monumental force of sheer willpower, she remained on her target, feeling herself slipping away from Discord as he shouted back at her. “Think this over and tell me when you return! I must know, do you hate me?” ********* With a small gasp and a quick coughing fit, Celestia gathered she had returned safely, but simultaneously the feeling that she would be unable to call anything else safe gnawed at her incessantly. She was back in her bedroom, Discord’s last words nothing more than a fading echo that were so faint, they could’ve easily been misheard, or perhaps nothing was heard at all. Yet she knew, as much as she wished she didn’t. He had spoken, and that singular question struck her with the weight of a runaway freight train. Do you hate me? What kind of a question was that? Of course she hated him! How could she not after everything that he had done to her, to the population of Equestria, the entire world even! The sheer gall he had to even ask the question, as if she would have any other answer for him was an insult that stung deeper than any physical wound. She hated him for what he had done to her friends, to her family, to... “Luna…” Celestia whispered softly, immediately covering her mouth in an effort to hide the noise. Only a few feet away, Luna slumbered peacefully on Celestia’s bed, her chest rising and falling with a subtlety that made no indication Luna was aware of what had just transpired. Quietly realizing that her mental outburst might turn verbal and awaken her sister, Celestia uncovered her mouth and carefully snuck past Luna and out onto the balcony, noting with curiosity that the door had been left open. Had Luna had been out here for some reason? She sighed and sat on the cold stone, gazing out across Equestria as she was fond of doing whenever the stress of her life as a princess started to weigh down on her. From here, the tallest point of the castle, she could gaze out at the scenery and easily lose herself as she observed the busywork of the ponies below her. At the moment, Canterlot was bathed in darkness, save for a few scant lights that highlighted the early risers and night lovers among the city’s high-class society. Further out, beyond Canterlot’s outskirts, a myriad of valleys, forests, and winding roads surrounded the mountain in all directions. She must have rested there for ten minutes or more, doing nothing else besides taking in the serene sights and sounds of her kingdom as the fury inside her slowly but steadily faded away. Secretly she wished for nothing more than an empty bed and a few hours rest, but Discord’s words had inscribed themselves at the back of her mind, forcing her to go over them again and again. Do you hate me? Yes, she hated him. How could she forgive him for the crimes he had committed, the families and communities torn asunder by the war for their freedom? A monster like him could only ever harbor hatred, both in himself and those whose lives he destroyed. Why would he ask her this? Surely he must’ve known her answer. He seemed to know her every thought and motivation, she realized with a shiver. If this disturbing trend was indeed continuing, why then would he bother with trivialities, and at such a dangerous time to ask her at that? If they were indeed linked in the way he described, the slightest mistake during her teleportation would obliterate both their minds. True, he would succeed in defeating her, but the Discord she knew and loathed wouldn’t sacrifice himself for anything, not even if it meant destroying his arch-nemesis in the process. She closed her eyes and assumed the same meditative posture she was in when Luna interrupted her the night before. With her sight gone, her other senses came to life and provided her with all the information she needed. A slight draft cooled her, bringing with it the sounds of the city below and the faint noises of nature from the forests. Finally, with her mind relaxed and her body still and her anger gone, she could think clearly. What did Discord know? What didn’t he know? The more she tried to make sense of it all, the more everything became hopelessly entangled as the knot Discord wrapped around her constricted tighter and tighter. With every theory came two rebuttals, with every rebuttal three explanations, each more preposterous and somehow probable than the last. With nothing more than words and a quick look into her past, he had trapped Celestia in a cycle of self-doubt and desperate searching for questions that had no answers and answers that had no questions. “Or so he would want,” Celestia spoke softly to herself with a smile. “So this is the way you want to play your games, Discord? Have me question and doubt myself into submission?” Yes, that’s what he wanted, without a doubt. He was a force to be reckoned with, a master of chaos that could conjure horrific spells with a single swipe of his hand, but his preferred method of fighting was much more subtle and subdued. He would never lift a finger if that silver tongue of his could slither its way into his enemies’ ears, and in many cases it did a far more effective job than any spell. He had begun and ended their meeting with mind games aimed at throwing her off balance, if only for a second. It would be all he needed, and he would regain the freedom that he had lost for over a thousand years. Do you hate me? “I may hate you, but I will not allow it to consume me.” She gazed up at the stars, counting them one by one as she whispered to the night air. “Do you hear me Discord? I pray you do. I will tell you right now, I will not break. I am Princess Celestia, the defender of these lands and protector of its people, and you cannot defeat me. I will die before I let any harm come to them.” The sun broke the horizon, and its rays lit Equestria in the same golden light that Celestia commanded. In its radiant power, all of the fears and doubts surrounding her encounter with Discord vanished, leaving in its wake the most powerful entity that walked the face of the planet. As she looked down upon her kingdom, the light filled her with the strength and determination that had allowed her to create invincible armies, raise cities that lasted through ages, and most of all, defeat the enemies that threatened the peaceful existence she had fought and bled and cried to obtain. The force of the sun had imbued her with a power beyond words, and at that moment, she could and would defeat Discord in any twisted game he tried to play with her.