//------------------------------// // What Child is This // Story: When The Mare Comes Around // by nanashi_jones //------------------------------// Lunch was sandwiches with a side of carrot sticks and swearing. “Fuck, I miss bacon,” May said as she bit into her lettuce, tomato, daisy sandwich. “I mean, this shit’s good and all, but bacon. Bacon, AJ.” I snorted at her. “I’m still Rachel,” I replied. May blinked, ducked her head and looked away. “Right. I knew that. Totally did. Damn straight you’re Rae, Rae.” Now that I wasn’t just casually listening to her, but really paying attention, I noticed May made these almost imperceptible pauses before she cursed. Like she was looking over her shoulder for a phantom adult or trying to pick the best word. They didn’t show up unless you were giving her the Sherlock eye, so she may not have been aware she was doing it. We ate quietly. Bored with that, I decided to try and make friends. “What do you like to do?” I asked May, giving Sam a look as she begged shamelessly for bits of my sandwich. “Huh?” I tossed a bit of bread and Sam went for it. “How do you spend your free time? What’re your interests?” “Why are- What do you care?” May asked, peering at me. “Making conversation. It’s you or AJ, and I’ve kinda talked to AJ a lot at this point.” May scrutinized me with an adorable squint. Whatever she was looking for, she didn’t find. She dropped her gaze and she fiddled with her food. “I, uh... I play guitar,” she said quietly before shoving the sandwich in her face. “Cool,” I replied. “Acoustic or-” “Electric,” she said sharply. She seemed to realize how fast she said that and turned back to her lunch. “O-kay,” I said. Silence again. I finished my sandwich and watched the filly. She finished her sandwich and turned to the carrot sticks, avoiding looking at me. I shrugged and leaned back. The tree we’d stopped at was cozy and I looked up through its leaves so I could see sky. I decided I’d been lucky so far. No really serious weather aside from it being a bit cold, and AJ’s body seemed resilient enough to that. It’s your body too, ya know, AJ said. My body’s... Somewhere, I said. This is just a loaner. The wind moved through the leaves, casting shadow patterns against the shining, blue sky. I smiled. I didn’t really get out a lot before this. I’d camped maybe twice in my whole life and preferred the luxury of AC whenever I could manage it. Yet, here I was, Miss Nature. You can have it if you want, AJ said. I blinked. “What?” May turned to me. I waved my hoof. “S- Sorry, AJ surprised me,” I said, but this just made her look harder. What are you talking about? I said quietly to AJ. I got some years out of it, she replied, sounding way too nonchalant. I’m good. Besides, y’got some good ideas in here. Like I said last night, accountin’ finally makes some sense. Y’could probably talk to my brother better’n I could now. You don’t have to be... Y’know. Dead. I shook my head. I’m not going to take your body, AJ, I said. I stand by the loaner call. This is yours. She became quiet. Finally, she said, Well... Don’t well, me, missy, I replied. This isn’t up for negotiation. She sighed. No it ain’t. But you deserve better than a ditch on the side of the highway. When all this is over, we’ll find somethin’. We’ll get you worked out. I promise. I was quiet for a while, not even my thoughts stirring. When they did, all I could say was, “Thanks, AJ. For the offer.” I’d do it again in a heartbeat, Sugarcube. “What’d she do?” May asked. “Hm? Oh, she offered me to stay. In here.” I patted my barrel. “I have other plans though,” I said with a smile. As soon as the words left my mouth, something clicked. I’d heard that phrase before. Pretty much verbatim from May when I first met her. “Your guitar...” I said, the idea taking shape. “What?” May replied, a bit defensive. “Play in a band?” “Well, uh. Yeah,” May replied, baffled. “Bet you got dreams along those lines, don’t ya?” “Yeah. Kinda,” May said, blushing and looking away. I grinned broadly. “Hey, it’s cool. I just put it all together. Makes sense that you’d be so gung-ho about New York. You’d have to learn how to play all over again. With hooves and even a horn. Well, a filly’s horn.” “Tch, yeah. Tell me about it,” May said, rolling her eyes. “I get a unicorn too young to use her magic. No way I can lift my Ibanez, much less get at the strings. All I can do is make sparks.” My eyebrow rose in knowing. “Sweetie tell you that?” “No that’s from-” Her eyes got wide. She shut her mouth and looked away. “It’s like... It makes sense. She’s, uh, young. Young unicorn- no magic. Just logical.” She nodded authoritatively, convincing herself. Unfortunately for her, she didn’t convince me. I sighed, leaned forward. “You can drop the act, you know. I don’t care.” “What act?” May said. Staring into her wide eyes all I could think was, Oh God. No wonder it never worked. I must have looked like a huge idiot any time I’d try to boldface lie to my mom. It was written all over her face and her open expression just underlined it. Rolling my eyes, I said, “Look, you know about this whole pony thing. That’s cool. You don’t have to keep acting like its some embarrassing secret. I mean, look at us. Kind of late to pretend you don’t know what’s up.” “Yeah, uh, well what do you know?!” May said, ducking her head, eyes darting back and forth. “I know that I was the only girl in my high school who liked comics,” I said. “And that sucked donkey balls, but it beat lying.” May took her turn to roll her eyes. “Oh great, I’m getting fucking lectured on honesty from the leading background pony.” “Insults only work if they’re gonna piss somepony off,” I said, leaning back against the tree. “Besides, I’m not lecturing. I’m just telling you. For me- I felt better owning my fandom rather than let other people tell me how I should feel about it. And trust me, Tumblr may be making noise about girls reading comics, but where I went- that didn’t matter for shit.” May ran a nervous hoof around her hoodie’s drawstring, rolling it and unrolling it as she tried to look everywhere but me. “So what?” she said. “You finally get some ‘true friends’ out of your deal?” I laughed. “Nope. I made friends with band kids and art students. Max and Brian were geeks, but they were more into big, fantasy novels and playing D and D. There were other guys in band who read comics, but they were assholes. Kept quizzing me.” I rolled my eyes. “Ugh, assholes. That I know about,” May said, her hoof slowing in its attention to the hoodie string. “They are universal.” “Yeah,” she said, looking up and almost making eye contact with me. “Mine was a bandmate, Greg. He was such a dick. I put one sticker on my guitar, just one and he kept giving me shit about wearing lolita dresses and crap like that. I had to punch out his teeth before Clyde and Tim stood up for me.” “Sucks,” I replied, sagely. “Yeah. And it was a Rainbow Dash sticker! Like, one of the cool stickers that even non-bronies are okay about. I only picked it because it’d be, y’know, less a problem. I mean, I really wanted to...” She looked up at me, as if realizing I was just now paying attention to her. “Never mind.” her eyes darted away, hiding under Sweetie’s mane. “Aw, c’mon,” I said. “We were talking like normal people there. How about this? Tit for tat. I give an embarrassing thing and you finish that stranded thought?” May looked at me uncertainly. “Uh, what?” I blew air, losing a little patience with the number of times a pony could say “what?” in a given conversation. I had to hold it though. Unless I wanted to spend the rest of this trip with the cussing, tough girl act, I couldn’t lose my patience here. “My bestie Max and I would sometimes trade if we felt weird about a thing. Usually it was me. Max’d give me some embarrassing bit I didn’t know so I could tell him what had me in a funk.” I smiled wistfully. “Max is cool like that.” “Oooo...” May said. “Okay. Um. You go first though.” Not gonna lie, I expected that. Nodding, I put my hoof to my chin in thought. The sticker sounded more like a personal thing- She didn’t want to give up something that ruined that tough girl image (not that looking like Sweetie didn’t do that already, but I digress). So, when did I do a thing that- Ah. “Back in high school, on top of comics, I was obsessed with Inu-Yasha.” “So?” May said. “I saw that on an old adult swim. It was alright.” “Well, yeah, but it was not me. I’m comics girl, remember? And this wasn’t Archie and romance manga bullshit, I like superhero comics and dudes kicking ass and stuff.” “So?” “So, Inu-Yasha was butt-kicking, but it was also romance stuff. It was all good- there’s a reason every girl goes through an Inu-Yasha phase- but for most comic guys? It’s just another ‘girl thing.’ I got crap for being into Hellblazer and Storm Watch from most of the school. If I mentioned I was reading girly manga to the other comics-reading guys? Pssht. I’d just be another one of ‘those chicks’ and it’d get way worse.” May certainly got that. She nodded, a miserable look in her eyes. “Your turn,” I said. “What was so big about the super-heinous pony sticker?” She rolled her eyes, then closed them. Through clenched teeth, she said, “Fluttershy.” Memory welled up. I remembered her from the show as the scaredy cat, but AJ remembered her as nervous with an inner strength. Yellow fur, pink mane, butterflies on her flank. She helped out with any animals too stubborn for me. You’re better than Wikipedia, I said to AJ. I’m better than a lot of things, AJ replied, self-satisfied. “I can see how butterflies on an electric guitar would get shit,” I said to May. “Yeah...” May said. “But it- I had a fuckin reason.” “Yeah?” “Yeah. See, I like playing, but getting in front of crowds is... I get sweaty. I’m fine if I’m just jamming, but I get on the stage and it’s like- Fucking gone. I could barely play my first gig. I got okay after it, but it still made me stiff and the guys were thinking I was a lost cause. Till I started thinking about Fluttershy and the dragon. You know about that?” “In a way,” I said. More AJ memory. Celestia asking us to get a dragon off a mountain, Fluttershy being scared every step of the way, me hauling her the long way- Yep. I remembered all right. And for the record, grown dragons are fucking HUGE. “Oh, right. Duh. AJ!” she proclaimed, gesturing to me with her hooves. Smiling slightly, she went on. “Anyway. I’m sweating and sweating and I get on stage and I think- boom. That audience- That’s my fuckin’ dragon. I can’t back down from that. I may not like my band guys too much, but I sure as shit like my music. And no way am I gonna let a dragon menace my music.” She shrugged, smiling, lay on her side. “So, I wanted Fluttershy stickers. But I knew I’d get shit, so I figured Dash would be fine too. I mean, she didn’t face down that dragon, but a little Dash- Fuck you, I’m awesome attitude could be a good zen too.” “That certainly sounds like Rainbow Dash,” I said, chuckling. “So you busted Greg’s teeth in over a Dash sticker...?” “What? Oh. Yeah. After I popped Greg, the other guys were like, yeah Greg you were over the line, but they did it in that, Crazy Girl Is Around way.” May sighed. “We finished rehearsal, but they’ve been dodging me ever since. Saying they’re too busy or don’t have time to jam. Which is dumb. They’re the only decent group out here without me having to go all the way into the city.” She flopped back, sprawling out on the ground. “That was... Two weeks ago? Yeah. Pricks.” She batted at her hoodie’s string. “And I was just gonna say forget it and put the Fluttershy stickers on anyway and try something else when this happened,” she said, gesturing to herself. “I haven’t been able to pick up my guitar since.” She held her hooves up in front of her face, just staring at them. “I mean... I can Sweetie sing, but it isn’t mine. It’s hers.” She rested her hooves on her belly. I whistled low in appreciation. “That... Royally sucks.” “Pssh. No kidding,” she responded. May closed her eyes, sighed and rolled over. “Doesn’t matter though. I got an Applejack escort, I’m going to New York and I’m gonna get my hands back from Lauren!” I chortled. May gave me a look. “Weren’t you the one who gave me crap for laughing at your situation?” “Sorry. You’re right.” I giggled one last time, getting it out of my system. Smiling at May, I said, “You know... You don’t swear as much when you’re just chatting.” She furrowed her brow at me. “So?” “Just making conversation,” I said, oh wise pony master that I was. May stared at me for a minute, before shaking her head. “Yeah, you’re definitely not AJ. You’re too weird. How’d she end up with you anyway?” I shrugged. “Hay if I know.” May blinked, cocked her head at me. “Do you do that on purpose?” “Do what?” We stared at one another and May shook her head. “Nothing. Nevermind.” “Suit yourself,” I said. Stretching, I decided we’d chatted enough. “Break’s over.” I picked myself up and slid on my trusty backpack. Moving it to just at the base of my neck, I lay on the ground, calling, “All aboard!” May bounded over and hauled herself onto the remaining space on my back. She moved my pack a little bit so she could lay her head on top if she wanted. Sam yipped at the activity and I grabbed a stick, throwing it down the path. Sam watched it go and looked back at me, confused. “I don’t think she knows that yet,” May commented. “Right,” I said. I looked at my hoof. Then why had I...? AJ? Weren’t me. That was all you, Sugarcube. I shook the feeling off and set a steady trot. “So... May,” I said after a few minutes. “Yeah?” “You say you got the Sweetie voice. Is it any good?” “You don’t know?” “Applejack’s only heard Sweetie sing a few times and they were... A different kind of memorable, but I remember Max was all about Sweetie having a good voice.” May chuckled. “He’s right. I may be tiny, but I have pipes in here. Why?” “It ain’t guitar, but you wanna sing a bit? AJ usually plays music in my head, but that’s only good for one.” May was quiet for a while. As I started to turn my head, she said, “I’ll, um. I’ll pass. I’m pretty fuckin’ tired. I didn’t really sleep last night.” “Then you grab a nap,” I said. “I can keep my back steady.” “Thanks,” she said, soft. She was appropriately quiet for a few minutes, and when I glanced over my shoulder, I saw she was out cold. Her body was draped across my back with her hood pulled up to keep out as much of the sunlight as possible. I smiled at her and returned to walking. Maybe this weight wasn’t as bad as I thought.