The good of the many

by Dafaddah


Chapter 9: Protocols

Laura froze in her tracks. The word 'Busted!' echoed through her head, until habit and training took over. She knew how to handle being blind-sided. Giving herself more time to think, she slowly lowered a flank onto a cushion just as the two mares had already done.

"My, she is a cool one!" remarked Sunset Hoofing. Then looking at Laura: "Rest assured, my dear, that we don't mean you any harm, and furthermore that we don't think you mean us any harm. And I suspect that you may have some difficulty believing me. Nevertheless, this is true."

Laura indeed agreed with the Minister, but she thought it best to keep silent and her options open.

"Perhaps it was discourteous of me to ask you to introduce yourself without my first doing so. My name is Sunset Hoofing, and I am the Minister of Science. The pony to your right is Her Royal Highness Princess Luna, co-ruler of the nation of Equestria. Now, I believe it's your turn."

Laura snorted - which embarrassingly came out much louder than she intended with a pony muzzle! But, she had been offered an information exchange, so here was an opportunity to at least learn more about her circumstances.

"Minister Hoofing, Princess Luna, my name is Dr. Laura Conner, and I am the Chief Scientist for the 'Celeste' project of the Large Hadron Collider at CERN, the European Center for Nuclear Research. Where is the Nation of Equestria? I have never heard of it before."

This time the Princess spoke up. "This is a bit complicated, but Equestria is a country located in a universe parallel to the one from which you have originated. It is not located on the planet earth you know, and the dominant life form here is equine, not human." She paused and smiled. "There, I gave you a bonus!"

Laura smiled at the Princess' attempt at humor. "Thank you, and to be honest, I had noticed."

"Good!" resumed Hoofing. "Without resorting to flattery, we had expected you would be above average intelligence."

"And why would that be?" Laura raised an eyebrow.

"Because the Equestrian with whom you have 'swapped bodies' works for me and I don't hire dummies!" said the old mare with a fiery look. "You see, such 'perceptual exchange between universes' as we call it, is only possible between very similar minds who have led very similar lives."

The human thought about this for a moment, making connections. "I had observed a startling number of parallels in my life to that of Glowball." She was struck by a sudden thought. "You call it 'perceptual exchange'. Does that mean that at this moment Glowball is inhabiting my body and running around CERN?"

Luna closed her eyes for a moment, and concentrated. Opening her eyes she said "Yes, she is currently sitting in the office of the one called Peter Tobler. They are discussing the problems that have plagued the center all day."

"How do you know that?"

"I can see into her mind. Yes, I know, her body is here, and you feel as if you are inhabiting it, but in fact physically you are still in CERN. You and Glowball are merely exchanging information across universes in the form of perceptions."

"However, we have a mutual problem." Minister Hoofing's spoke again, this time assuming a more serious expression. "You see, the causative factor of the 'perceptual exchange' is an unfortunate process called multiversal convergence. I believe a term you might be more familiar with is 'm-brane collision'. No matter what you call it, the consequence might be the end of all we hold dear in both universes." She looked to the Princess.

"All indicators show that the danger is both severe and imminent. The convergence is also the reason for the morning's physical anomalies experienced in both universes."

Laura did not like the direction this was taking. "What are the odds of this convergence leading to an actual m-brane collision?"

"Currently, very high." The Princess looked grim. "However, there is a possibility of preventing the convergence from reaching actual contact. The reason that Minister Hoofing and I wished to speak with you was to obtain your help in avoiding the collision from happening."

"I hate to sound uncaring of the fate of the...uh, two universes, but please understand that in my universe, extraordinary claims do need to be supported by extraordinary evidence."

"We follow sound scientific doctrine in this universe as well, and most rigorously in my ministry, as I am sure you had ample occasion to observe on your tour this morning!" harrumphed the old mare.

"What more evidence do you need?" asked Princess Luna.

"How do I know that this entire situation was not somehow engineered by you? That any assistance I offer might actually have nothing to do with avoiding a disaster, and more to achieving your own unstated purposes? For that matter, how do I know this isn't just some dream or hallucination?"

Minister Hoofing appeared mollified from her brief ire. "Those are the right questions, deary, and first things first! Show me your foreleg!"

Mystified, Laura did as the old mare requested. Whereupon she lowered her muzzle and bit down on Laura's leg, pinching her quite painfully!

"Ouch! That hurt!" Laura looked at the pony foreleg she had just pulled back reflexively, and began to chuckle. "Ok, so this passes the 'pinch' test. I am willing to concede that this is not an illusion but actual physical reality." She looked up at the cackling minister, and began to think that she could come to like this old mare. She noticed Princess Luna smiling at her and suspected that she might share her opinion of Hoofing.

The Princess rose and spoke. "As to the latter part of your question, I believe it's time for you to see a bit of Equestria outside this building, and to meet my sister, Princess Celestia. Let's walk back to the castle."

***

They exited the Ministry of Science with Princess Luna in the lead. Laura Connor was absolutely astounded at the city before her. "Minister Hoofing, please be prepared to pinch me again," she related breathlessly, and paused a moment considering. "The only way I can describe this view is medieval fairy tale meets Mary Poppins!" She gaped at the ponies strolling, galloping and flying around, some partially dressed, some wearing elaborate clothing, and most without a stitch on. Something about the flying ponies bothered her. "There is simply no way these tiny wings could provide enough lift for the pegasi's bodies, assuming they weigh the same as a normal pony would. How can they fly?" she asked the elderly mare.

"Dr. Connor, I assume that during your tour you had multiple occasions to see magic at work. Flight is the magic of the pegasi. When we Equestrians first worked out the laws of aerodynamics we quickly discovered that same troubling fact. However, we also noticed that flying ability seemed to not be directly related to the size of the wings, but rather to an innate talent and the degree of practice exercised by the pegasus in question. Nevertheless, damage to the wings disables a pegasus' ability to fly, leading to the discovery that the wings themselves draw on magical energy to significantly boost their power, and thus are still the actual enablers of flight. By the way, the pegasi also possess other magical abilities permitting them to manipulate wind and water, especially in its vaporous state."

Laura considered for a moment. Since they were answering questions anyway, she decided to continue interrogating them. "I had noticed that the unicorns' horns glowed whenever they did magic. What is really happening when they do this and what is the source of this magical energy?"

"The unicorn's horn is the organ through which they channel magical energy to do work. In a way, it acts much like a transistor for magical energy. The horn essentially allows the unicorn's will to manipulate the universal magical energy field via a spell - a mental formulation or sequence of magical energy manipulations. The effects of a spell can be nearly instantaneous or last anywhere from a few seconds to years, depending on how powerful the magician is, and how much of that power they employ in executing the spell. Also a skilled magician can create spell formulations that operate following a logical decision structure, and can be built up from the juxtaposition of pre-existing spells. From what I have read, this is not dissimilar to computer programming in your own universe."

As they turned a corner, an absolutely breathtaking fairytale castle came into view, with white towers and water falls giving it a cathedral-like quality. "That is indeed a beautiful sight!" sighed Dr. Connor, pausing to gather in the view. "How do you know so much about my universe?"

Luna chose her words carefully. She didn't want to lie to this very sharp intellect, but she also did not think it wise to be too forthcoming either. "Our two universes approach each other or get more distant as time passes. When they get sufficiently close, information may pass between them. Such leakage has been happening since time immemorial. The government of Equestria has been seeking and documenting these leakages for over a millenium. It also helps that I and my sister can see in our subjects' sleeping minds and thereby gather information on your universe in their dreams, or during episodes of perceptual exchange. In your own universe these visions have led to legends of unicorns, pegasi and other such mmythical entities who are entirely real in this universe."

"One more question. How is it that you all are speaking english, and that I'm able to walk around on all fours like I was born to it?" This was the issue that had bothered Laura the most since discovering that she herself wore a pony body.

Hoofing spoke up this time. "Oh, we have a little fish that ..."

"Sunset!" Luna interrupted, the old mare cackling in delight.

"I'm sorry, dear! I simply could not resist!" She grew more serious for a moment. "In fact, your own brain is receiving input pre-processed by Glowball's own autonomous and lower brain functions, and that lower brain is responding to your conscious mind's inputs and translating them into the appropriate body movements, speech, etc. You are at this moment conversing in Equestrian, not your native language. Perhaps this is why full 'perceptual exchange' can only be initiated when both 'resonant' brains have entered into REM sleep and the link between the higher and lower brain functions has been suppressed."

Laura could detect no obvious falsehood or misdirection in what she had been told, and it was entirely consistent with what she had observed during the day so far. In fact, many remarks pertaining to magic, spells and energy now made sense in retrospect.

"You are proving most effective in convincing me that this universe is real enough. Thank you for answering these questions." She smiled to show her honest appreciation. "But convincing me that your intent towards humanity is honest and benign may prove a bit more challenging."

"I have an idea about this as well, although it may take a bit of effort and luck to make it happen. Happily, this is where all the ponies required are located." said the Princess, pointing with a hoof to a huge and ornate gate at the front of the Castle.

They ingressed the castle via its main entrance, the guard ponies therein bowing to Princess Luna as they proceeded unchallenged into the main hall, up the grand stairway and to the residential wing.

***

The first thing that Twilight noticed was a desk on which her face rested. She slowly raised her head, a sheet of paper sticking to her face. Success! This meant her current face was hairless, and she was back in the human's body. She looked around and saw that she was in an office, with chairs, filing cabinets, binders and papers everywhere, and plants (mostly decorative she guessed, as she didn't care for the taste of these flowers.)

She got up to look around, wondering how she was managing so well to keep her balance on only two legs. Looking back, she spied a name plate on the desk: 'Laura YC Lachance'. "Now we're making real progress!" she said out loud. Then went back to the desk and began opening drawers, locating what looked like a fountain pen with a strange conical tip that ended in a minuscule ball. Rubbing a finger on it produced a line in blue ink. "Writing instrument: check!" said Twilight.

Rummaging further she found a ream of cut sheets of paper. "Paper: check!" Next to it she found a stack of small white cards with printed words on them. "Jackpot! Business cards." She read the card.

Mary YC Lachance
Science Advisor to the President
Office of the Administration
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW
Washington, DC 20502, USA
...

The card had a few more lines with some numbers and symbols that didn't mean anything to Twilight. But she had what she needed: a name! Taking the pen in her fingers - eeeewwwee! - she tried not to look at them, and thought about writing as if she were using her horn to move the pen. It worked! She wouldn't win any penponyship contests, but it was generally legible.

Dear Mary,

My name is Twilight Sparkle and I am the purple pony you have seen in your dreams of late. Let me assure you that I am not a dream and that I was as shocked to find myself in a human body as you were to find yourself in mine. (But probably less grossed out because your fingers remind me of snakes.)

You probably just woke up from a dream where you had a conversation with a small pink and green dragon called Spike. (Please be nice to him, he is my number one assistant and I have raised him from the time he hatched from his egg.)

As my time is limited I will be brief. Both our worlds are in danger. My sovereign Princess Celestia has tasked me to set up a way for us to communicate and coordinate our efforts so we can avoid this catastrophe. I am hoping you can work with me to do the same from your side.

Please write down your reply to this letter and place it in the desk drawer with all the blank sheets so I can find it easily next time. I hope this works!


Kind regards,
Twilight Sparkle
Personal student to Her Royal Highness Celestia, ruler of Equestria
Canterlot Castle
(but usually I live at the Library in Ponyville)

P.S. I can see that you repainted your finger nails. I like the new color better than the old one. That reminds me that I should go to the spa and have my hoofpaint redone before Rarity notices how cracked it is and I get a lecture on how to look like a lady.

Twilight was pleased with the result and placed the letter square on the desk, sitting back down in the chair in which she awoke. It should be any moment now.... 'Spike, what is taking you so long?' she thought, becoming concerned, when finally the light in the room started to fade...

***

Spike took the 'sleeping cap' off of Twilight's head. He was careful with it as she had dropped like a stone when she put it on. She slept on for a moment, and then began to wake, slowly lifting her head off the cushion where she lay, stopping when she was facing him directly. Her eyes grew wide. "Squeeeeee! A baby dragon!"

Twilight had prepared Spike for this moment. Assuming a confident but non-threatening pose, he raised a paw and said in his most gentledragonly manner "Welcome to Equestria, and fear not, for I am a friendly... umphh." was all he managed before Twilight (or the human presently in her head) grabbed him in both forelegs, and hugged him tightly.

"Oh, you're soooooo cute!". Spike was crushed against the mare's chest again, and was wondering if and when he might ever be able to draw another breath, when he was finally released. "And you can talk! Ahem, I'm sorry I interrupted you, but I just couldn't help myself, you are just so adorable! I wish I would see you in all my dreams, ya little hunk!" She looked down on Spike fondly.

"Well, about that, ahem, you see this isn't a dream. And I'm supposed to to tell you that, and uh... what else was I supposed to say? You know it's very flattering but way distracting to repeatedly be called 'cute' when I have a job to do. Uh, my name is Spike... And there was something else..." Spike blushed.

"Hello Spike, my name is Mary, why wouldn't I believe this is a dream, after all I'm talking to a baby dragon! And instead of hands and arms I have purple horse legs and hooves." She smiled at him as if this was an irrefutable argument.

"Hi Mary. Hmmm, this is going to be harder than I thought. How about I tell you the rest of the message my guardian, Twilight Sparkle, instructed me to give you when you woke up?" Spike was quite relieved when she nodded enthusiastically. "Okay, here goes: 'The Universes of both Equestrians and humans are in danger, and we are trying to set up a way to communicate so we can team up and prevent a big explosion'.... or something like that," concluded Spike.

"That sounds really serious. By the way, is everyone else here some sort of fairytale creature?" asked Mary.

Spike sighed, looked towards the ceiling and began saying "Of course not..." when the door opened and Princess Celestia entered. Spike bowed to her, and turned back towards Mary. "You see, Princess Celestia here is a perfectly normal pony, er, that is despite being an Alicorn, and a Princess, oh, and the ruler of Equestria..." He looked back at the Princess. "Did I forget anything this time?" When Celestia shook her head, he smiled in relief. "There, see! Oh, and please let me introduce you. Mary the Human, please meet Her Royal Highness Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria. Phew!"

Mary looked at the Princess, who had approached during the introductions. "It's a pleasure to meet you, your Highness."

"The pleasure is mine, Mary. I felt your arrival and decided to come meet you. I suspected my student Twilight Sparkle had some sort of plan under way, so I listened at the door first before coming in. I hope you don't mind!"

"Oh, not at all." Said Mary with a smile. "I can't think of anything I would rather do after meeting a cute baby dragon than have a chat with a beautiful white unicorn princess, with wings to boot!"

Celestia smiled diplomatically. "I can see how this might look a bit fantastical to you, but rest assured it is real, although of a reality other than the one of Earth and the human race."

"Oh!" said Spike. "Now I remember what else I had to say." He resumed the confident but non-threatening pose. "Here it is: 'In order to prove that what I am saying is true I have instructed my #1 assistant Spike to tell you about this situation. While he does this, using your body I will leave proof of my presence in your universe. He will then put the sleeping cap back on your head, allowing us to switch back. Please follow the instructions I will leave you in a written note. He will then do so again fifteen minutes later, so we can switch again, and I can read your answer to my first communication. We will do this until we have agreed on a plan. I hope you don't mind all the switching but it's the best idea I could come up with on short notice.'" Spike took a deep breath, then picked up the sleeping cap.

Mary looked at the baby dragon approaching her with a big floppy night cap, lowering her head to make it easier as the little guy had such short arms. "Oh, and I guess this is supposed to put me to sle..." She collapsed on the cushion.

"Oh my," said the Princess, "that certainly is very effective! Even I might be able to use that on occasion."

"Twi warned me to be careful with it. It works really fast, and somepony could get hurt as they literally fall asleep!" He again removed the cap gingerly from the lavender mare's head. A moment later she blinked awake.

"Did it work? Did she take over my body? Did she panic? Oh, Princess Celestia. Hi!"

"Hey Twi, it worked like a charm. Really. A good one!" offered Spike.

"This Mary seems like a nice person," added the Princess.

"Yeah. And she has a thing for baby dragons!" Spike blushed again. "You said she might be all scared 'n stuff, but she was pretty cheery instead. I'm not sure she took us that seriously, though."

"I have to agree with Spike." spoke Celestia. "Were you able to leave written instructions for her in the human universe?"

Twilight smiled. "Yes, in fact everything went exactly to plan!"

***

The first thing that Mary noticed was the desk on which her face rested. She slowly raised her head, a sheet of paper sticking to her face. She reached up, peeling it off of her face. 'Man, another of these fairy pony dreams!' she thought. She looked at the page in her hand.

Dear Mary,

My name is Twilight Sparkle and I am the purple pony you have seen in your dreams of late...

"Oh, bloody hell..."