Chapter 17
On Your Marks, Get Set...
Upon the multicolored road our heroes strode through standing tall and not-so-tall. The stars lit up the night sky brighter than what seemed normal, and in the distance, the winding road continued for what seemed like ages, or several Mario Kart games.
The road was incredible in length, stretching and repeating in the same colors. The heroes continued on, Vinyl Scratch trotting ahead to scout.
"It just keeps going." She called back to the others.
"Hmmph hmm hmmph mm?" The Pyro asked, turning to his taco love.
She said nothing.
"We don't have much choice, we'll have to keep walking." Sephiroth said as the pony rejoined the group, walking next to the angel.
They continued onward down the path, for miles and more miles. Trekking down a road unlike anything they had ever traveled. It seemed worse than passing the same tree over and over. They took a look back from where they had come from, but couldn't see anything past the draw distance. The moon and a great deal of the road they had already traveled had disappeared behind them. Turning back was not an option.
"Are we going to have to walk this whole road?" Vinyl asked, her hooves becoming quite tired.
Sephiroth looked around. Though his stamina was great, it was apparent that his teammates could not keep this up. Especially for how long the ever-expanding road seemed to last. With the exception of the potato and the taco, the entire team was struggling to keep going.
"I'm not sure Vinyl..." Sephiroth said softly, trying not to let the others hear his despair.
"That's a nice sentiment Seph ol' buddy," Yakko panted from behind. "but we can just read the words on the screen."
Bamboozled and smackledorbed, Sephiroth shook his head at the dog's statement and kept moving forward.
Suddenly, just up ahead, something new in this beautifully barren road. A large black and white checker flag, with the words 'MARIO KART' emblazoned in the center. Below it, Eight karts, all same in design but varying in colors. And just in front of them, another black and white checker pattern, completely contrasting the rainbow road. And even further ahead, completely off of the road and in space, they could see a what looked like a planet in the distance. It was round for the most part, but from the looks of it, it seemed incomplete.
"You guys don't think that that's Captain Planet's 'Perfect World' do ya?" Yakko said, pointing into the distance.
"That would be a logical guess." GLaDOS said. "Considering we are close to the Captain according to the useless pony from the moon."
"Well we can't worry about that right now. We don't even have a means of getting there." Sephiroth stepped forward and gestured to the karts lined up neatly in two rows of four. "What the heck is this?"
"Perhaps someone has been expecting us?" GLaDOS suggested, staring at the odd scenery.
"Quite right, you wonderful spud!"
The heroes looked forward to see another figure upon the road. They could barely make out the man as he strolled closer to the karts. But from the looks of it, the man had short brown hair, a suit, and was sporting some snazzy shoes.
"Hmmph mm hmm hmmph hmmp phmm?" The Pyro asked, sneaking a closer peak with his super vision that he doesn't have.
"No... it can't be..." Yakko said, using his eyes to look forward.
"Yes... it can be." The man said, gesturing to his awesomeness.
"Oh for the love of, SPIT IT OUT!" Sephiroth shouted, frightening the man and his comrades.
"Alright, fine." The man stepped out of his enigma and revealed himself to be none other than the dashing prince of captains and captain of monkey I don't know where I'm going with this anymore WILL FERRELL! (love us)
"You!" Vinyl yelled out, reaching for her bass cannon.
"Me!" Will said. He then put on a confused look and said. "Wait... how did you get to here?"
The heroes exchanged confused looks with each other, unsure of what he meant.
"What exactly do you mean?" Sephiroth asked.
"I mean, how did you get to Rainbow Road?" Will asked, sounding rather condescending. "Captain Planet only showed his strongest men the secret to getting to here."
"Then why did he show Tristan?" Yakko prodded on, giving a quick low-five to the Pyro.
"Tristan!?" Will shouted, surprised at his comrade. "I can't believe he'd go and double cross me like that!"
"What do you mean by double crossed you?" Vinyl asked, squinting through her glasses.
"Never mind, it's not important." Will hastily reassured, straightening out his suit and clearing his throat. "I am the last one standing between you and the Captain. So it's my job to stop you."
"Well good luck to ya buddy." Yakko taunted, stepping forward.
"Hmmph hmm! hmm hm mm hmph mmph!" The Pyro added, aiming his flamethrower at Will.
"Yeah! Whatever he tried to say!" GLaDOS said, readying her... potato-ness.
"We've handled plenty of tough foes!" Vinyl said. "You and your captain are no match for us!"
Will grinned a devilish grin. "Oh I seriously doubt that." He looked at the heroes not but a few yards away. "Look above you."
The heroes hesitantly turned their gazes skyward. Just above them, an enormous red spaceship drifted through the starry sky, the fire bursting from the exhaust pipes and many other smaller ships floating around the vessel. It was like... really big. Really really big. And just behind it, attached by what seemed like a tractor beam, there floated a gigantic chunk of what appeared to be...
"Is... is that...?" Vinyl stammered, too speechless for words.
"What is it?" Sephiroth asked, turning to the stunned pony. "What is that Vinyl?"
"It's Equestria... It's my home..."
"This was not part of his original plan." Will said gravely. "But I'm afraid, my dear heroes, you left Captain Planet no choice."
The giant red ship hauled the continent overhead. The ship seemed to be heading towards the planet in the distance.
The heroes were too shaken to speaken, so Willen continued on.
"This is just a small reminder of the power Captain Planet has at his disposal."
"Well thanks," Yakko said, becoming more and more agitated by the second. "But we aren't interested in the captain's sink."
While Yakko and the Pyro proceeded to call Will bad words, Sephiroth knelt down to Vinyl. "Are you alright?"
Vinyl remained silent, tears dripping from her eyes. Sephiroth had no idea what to do. Usually, he was the one causing the tears. This was new ground for him... how exactly does one comfort a friend?
"We'll... um..." Sephiroth started, searching for the right words.
Vinyl just looked up, connecting eyes with her angel friend. Without a single word, she knew what he was trying to say, and hugged him tightly.
Surprised, Sephiroth put his arms around Vinyl, more instinct than emotion, he didn't think he had ever done anything like this before. But one thing was sure, he didn't dislike it.
"Enough!" Will shouted, his feelings slightly hurt from the names Yakko and the Pyro were calling him. "Let's just cut to the race!"
The heroes looked back and forth as Will stepped into the green kart in the front.
"Don't you mean chase?" Yakko asked.
"No. Race." Will repeated. "That's how you get to the Captain. You must beat me in a race." He started his engine and revved his kart up. "And since I'm such a good sport, I'll make you guys a deal."
The engine sputtered and spurred as the others hesitantly walked up to the karts.
"Hmmph hmm mm hmmph?" The Pyro asked with a shrug.
"Assuming you asked the obvious, I'm glad you asked." Will said, leaning back against the seat. "If you guys all beat me, then I will give Vinyl Scratch her magic back."
Vinyl Scratch looked up, shocked at what she had just heard. "You... you can do that?"
Will looked back, a smug face on his head. "You have no idea what I can do."
Stunned by this new revelation, the group couldn't muster the words required for a coherent response. The Pyro's response was the best they could hope for, as he ran to the red kart right next to Will's. He sat down, started his engine, and motioned for the others to join him.
"We all have to beat you?" Yakko asked, strolling towards the orange kart behind the Pyro.
"Isn't that what I said?" Will asked sarcastically. "You all have to beat me, otherwise, no magic, and no passage to Norwegia."
As Yakko climbed into the vehicle and revved the engine a bit, the others picked out their karts as well. Sephiroth and Vinyl Scratch approached the eight karts, holding Latisha and GLaDOS as they decided which colors to take.
"I don't care much which kart you give me, just as long as it has an on-board computer and a go pedal." GLaDOS said with a non-existent smirk. Sephiroth plugged her into the nearest kart, which just so happened to be pink. "Thank you. Oh, by the way, how did you know pink is my favorite color?" Using her adapter, she was able to access the kart and rev the engine even without feet.
"Are you sure we can beat him?" Sephiroth asked Vinyl, as he placed Latisha in the light green kart, which for the sake of plot convenience had an autopilot feature. "I've never driven one of these before."
"I don't know," Vinyl said, climbing into the blue kart in the back of the line. "but we have to try."
With the race about to begin, Sephiroth began to climb into the cramped yellow kart next to Vinyl's. "Don't worry." He assured. "We'll win this. We'll get you your magic back, and somehow we'll save your world. I promise."
"... Thank you." Vinyl said, trying to focus on the task at hoof.
"Um..." Yakko started in a confused tone. "Has anyone else noticed this guy next to me?"
Surely enough, next to Yakko and behind Will, filling the last available kart (purple btw) was a short, fat man. He had pointy ears and a huge pink nose. His mustache zigged and zagged and his attire consisted of a yellow hat with a 'W' on the front, purple overalls and brown shoes.
"Who is that clown?" GLaDOS asked curiously. "And more importantly, when did he get here?"
The man stared forward, paying no attention to the odd array of characters in this Grand Prix. He merely stated "Im'a Wario! Im'a gonna win!"
"... Oooookay then." Yakko said, as a small fanfare played, signalling the start of the race.
Our heroes' focus tightened as the countdown began. With Will already in the lead, it would be a difficult race to win.
On your marks...
Get set...