“You have to make the Princess stop this, Twilight! I can’t go on like this!” Pinkie Pie wailed at the top of her lungs. “This war on sweet is completely crazy.” She grabbed Twilight’s head in her hooves and pressed her face to hers. Her voice fell into a whisper. “And believe me, I know what I’m talking about.”
Twilight took Pinkie in her magic and pushed her back. “I’m not happy about this either, but a royal decree is a royal decree. You can’t just say ‘I’ll take a bit of the eternal alicorn wisdom and immense magic, but hold the crazy decrees and occasional abuse of power.’ Generations of ponies have put up with this before and so will we. When Celestia goes on a diet the whole of Equestria goes on a diet, it’s as simple as that.” Twilight walked up to Pinkie and took her hooves. “Just hold it together for a month or two. Princess Luna has promised me that these … episodes never last longer than that. Besides, I don’t see anypony else complaining.” Her hoof pointed at the assembled group of their friends around the library’s main table.
“Yeah, Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash smiled. “Suck it up, It’s not that bad.” She waved at Spike who just walked in from the kitchen. ”Hey Spike. Do you have any of that Prof Cayenne left? That soda packs a real punch!”
A few moments later Zecora was startled by a loud cry and spilled her tea into the cauldron.
Twilight rubbed her ears. “Rainbow Dash! Didn’t you just say to ‘suck it up’?”
“But the things named after a completely different spice?” Rainbow Dash looked perplexed. ”It’s not Prof Sugar or Prof Honey or anything.”
“Oh good that you mention it, thank you Rainbow! I’d almost forgotten.” Twilight turned away from the one pegasus pony and turned to the other one. “Fluttershy, your beehives, could you talk to them and tell them to keep the honey production down for the time being? Thank you so much.” Rainbow felt an ice-cold gaze on her, but didn’t dare to face Fluttershy right now.
“I don’t know if the bees will understand that,” Fluttershy was very careful as she chose her words. She knew exactly what would happen if she asked the hives to stop with the honey. It wouldn’t be … nice.
“Well, they are only insects after all,” Twilight sighed. “I’ll help you put them back into the Everfree tomorrow.” She scribbled a note onto a list, not even noticing how Fluttershy’s face turned into a frown.
“Talking about produce, Applejack, how many Golden Delicious and Red Delicious trees do you have at the farm this year?” Twilight read another item from her list.
“”Golly, I have no exact number for you from the top of my head, Twilight.” Suspicion hung heavy in in voice “Why do you ask?”
“Well, while the diet is in effect only Granny Smith apples are allowed to be sold. And growing sweet fruits could technically be seen as preparation of a crime. You might want to chop those trees down. Just to be on the safe side, you know.“
Applejack was at a loss for words.
Twilight smiled, nodded and checked off another point. “Now Rarity, … I have no idea what I could tell you to look out for in this situation.”
“I know, darling. I just can’t say how much I like this! With everypony on diet I will have so much work with refitting dresses. I’ll make a fortune!” The other ponies except Twilight looked at Rarity with poorly concealed contempt. “In fact I have an appointment right now. Pinkie Pie, would you like to come with me? I’m sure you would love to meet this pony.” In the end Rarity had to carry her almost catatonic friend on her back.
***
The Carousel Boutique was dark. All curtains were drawn, and Rarity had given Sweetie Belle some sugar lumps to share with her friends. She had to make sure there would be no unexpected listeners. She placed a teaspoon of powder sugar in front of Pinkie Pie who was still unresponsive. A smile played around her lips as the pink nose twitched. “Welcome back, Pinkie. Now, I have business proposal for you.”
Pinkie frowned. “ Business? Don’t you make enough bits out of this ‘I like it so much’-diet? Some Element of Generosity you are.”
“You misunderstood, Pinkie. I said ‘I can’t say how much I like it’, because then I’d have to resort to cursing, and that’s unbecoming of a lady. Just imagine, after two months without sweets even Cup Cake will look like a supermodel. Can you imagine how that makes me feel? I torture myself like that for years to keep my figure, and with this stupid diet everyone will become slim in no time at all! Where does this leave me?” Rarity put her mouth close to Pinkie’s ear, “No, my darling, the sugar must flow! What this town needs is a hero, a hero they want, a hero for the sweets. Can you be that hero?”
That night the Sugar Czar appeared for the first time.