Equestria Girls 2: Electric Boogaloo
Vodka.
That's what the official police report said. Someone slipped huge amounts of vodka into the punch bowl, during Canterlot High's Fall Formal. As a result, most of the students got ridiculously drunk and started seeing things.
The most common hallucination revolved around Sunset Shimmer. Students said that Sunset turned into a fearsome dragon creature. She turned everyone into her zombie slaves and destroyed the school's entrance, until she was stopped by a talking dog and a group of half-human, half-pony warriors.
Clearly, vodka was responsible for these delusions. Mind-altering drugs may have been involved, too.
After the police report was filed, Principal Celestia required all the students to attend substance abuse classes. Everyone thought that would be the end of the story, but they were wrong. They were very, very wrong.
You see, with all the talk about magical portals and pony adventures and dragon-led zombie hordes, two very important people were overlooked. The first was Twilight Sparkle's human counterpart, who lived in the city. The second was Sunset Shimmer's human counterpart.
Yes, of course Sunset Shimmer has a human counterpart. Every pony in Equestria has a human counterpart. Well, every pony besides Princess Cadance. For some reason, her counterpart in Canterlot High is a fire hydrant. No one knows why.
The pony Sunset Shimmer was hit with the Elements of Harmony, and she immediately was turned into a crying, remorseful teenager. But the human version of Sunset Shimmer? She never went through such a convenient reformation. She was still in the human world, and she was very, very angry.
We'll check in on Human Twilight and Human Sunset later on. For now, our story begins with Canterlot High's five best friends, who were getting ready to attend their substance abuse class.
"Can you believe it's been almost a month since the Fall Formal?" Rarity asked. "And Sunset Shimmer hasn't done a single mean thing in all that time! I think she's truly reformed!"
"I agree," Applejack said. "I like her much better as a friend than an enemy."
"Sunset is nice, but...I miss Twilight," Fluttershy said softly.
"Yeah, I know what you mean," Rainbow Dash said. "Personally, I miss those wings I got during the dance. Flying was awesome! Too bad it was only temporary."
Pinkie Pie scratched her head. "Temporary? Didn't Twilight say the portal automatically opens and closes?"
"Yeah, once every thirty months," Applejack said. "That's why she was so worried about not gettin' back home in time."
Pinkie wracked her sugar-addled brain. Something seemed off about her friends' statements, but she couldn't put her finger on it.
Pinkie liked to think of herself as an amazing detective, so she decided to research the mysterious portal to Equestria. She looked up "portal" on the Internet, and she immediately got distracted playing videogames. Eventually, she got kicked out of the school library by Cheerilee.
While Pinkie was getting chewed out by Cheerilee, she was able to get a quick look at the list of books that were checked out. These books included a number of interesting reads, such as Mystery Pony Portals and How to Use Them, Meeting Your Equine-Based Doppleganger and Advanced Underwater Basket Weaving. Pinkie's attention was immediately drawn to a pop-up book entitled That's Enough out of You, Luna! TO THE MOOOOOOOON!.
And thus, Pinkie's investigation took a serious turn, as she burst into the administrative offices without permission.
"Hi, Vice-Principal Luna!" Pinkie shouted.
Vice-Principal Luna, who had been reviewing school policies in other countries, sighed loudly. "Pinkie," the older woman said. "What are you doing here? Did you break one of the basketball nets again?"
"The librarian said you have a book on astronomy," Pinkie Pie said cheerfully. "I was wondering if I could borrow it."
"Ah, yes," Luna said. "I trust you want to learn more about the full moon tomorrow?"
"There's a full moon tomorrow?" Pinkie Pie asked.
"There's one every month," the dark and gloomy vice-principal said. "The moon stays full for three days when that happens."
"I didn't think astronomy worked like that," Pinke said.
Vice-Principal Luna shrugged. "If I could control the moon, I would have a full moon every night. They're so beautiful... "
At this, Pinkie went wild and lost her mind; she took this game into overtime. The pony portal opened regularly...the full moon appeared regularly...the two had to be connected somehow!
"Being in charge of discipline at Canterlot High, the only kind of moon I see is...never mind," Luna said, shaking her head. She handed over the pop-up book on astronomy to Pinkie Pie. "You can borrow this, but make sure to return it to the library on time."
"Okey dokey lokey!" Pinkie said. Holding the book triumphantly over her head, Pinkie knew the answer to all of her questions was not far off!
Ten minutes later, Pinkie slumped down in the corner near her locker.
"I don't understand, Gummy," Pinkie said to the green creature in her hand. "How can I solve this mystery?"
Gummy appeared to make no response.
"Maybe I'm not such a good detective..." Pinkie pouted. "But if I don't solve the mystery, we'll never see Twilight again! That's horrible!"
Again, the green Gummy did nothing. Pinkie reacted as if he had given a passionate speech, however.
"That's it, Gummy!" Pinkie said. "Why didn't you say that sooner? I'll just check the portal every day until it works!"
Pinkie hugged Gummy, which left nasty green slime all over her cheek. Rarity, who happened to be walking down the hallway at the time, stopped and gasped.
"EW!" Rarity shouted. "Is that used gum?"
Pinkie Pie shoved the large green gum creature into her locker. "It's Gummy!" she said. "Mom wouldn't let me get a real alligator, you know!"
Pinkie and Rarity argued for a bit about whether or not Gummy was disgusting, and Pinkie ran away crying because Gummy was the only boy in school who legitimately liked her for who she was. All the other boys only liked her for her parties!
Pinkie hadn't thought about running away from her life before, but she was sure thinking it now! The magical pony portal was the perfect way to avoid the stress of high school. She jogged straight towards the pony statue in front of Canterlot High and painfully smashed against it.
"Oh...right...the portal was on the back side of the statue," Pinkie remembered. She walked around the statue and cautiously put her hand against the stone.
Her hand slid right through the stone, like magic. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!" Pinkie said. She tentatively put a foot inside the portal, and when she didn't die instantly, she dove right inside. The world around Pinkie changed, and she felt like she was being dragged through a whirlwind of pizza, coffee and sleepless nights. In other words, it felt like finals week.
The weird sensations ended, and Pinkie found herself on all fours, inside a mostly-empty room. Pinkie's first reaction—don't ask me why—was to wiggle her bottom from left to right, so her tail would bounce around.
"I'M A PONY!" Pinkie shouted. "My life is finally complete!"
Pinkie's new body instinctively snorted, then whinnied. This caused her to trip over her hooves and smack her snout on the floor.
"Ow."
Pinkie sang to herself as she danced through the crystal hallways.
Doo de doo de doo
Electric Boogaloo
Pinkie Pinkie Pie
Is a pony now!
Everything in the pony universe was so pretty and shiny! It was a beautiful place, filled with so many wonders, casting a spell that she was now under.
The only problem was that there were no other ponies around! Pinkie had apparently arrived in a forgotten room in an unknown castle. She tried looking out a window, but all she could see were mountains in the distance. BORING!
After some wandering, Pinkie saw a guidepost which pointed towards several locations, including the throne room. Pinkie gasped.
"That must be where Twilight is! She's the pony princess!"
Pinkie waggled her ears and danced her way to the throne room. "HELLOOOOOOOOOOOO!" she shouted loudly.
Pinkie immediately found six spears, pointed directly at her face. They were being held by a group of angry-looking guards. Pinkie had no idea how they could hold spears without fingers, but this didn't seem like a good time to ask.
Things escalated quickly, when Shining Armor received a reply from his sister.
Dear BBBFF,
The instant I got your letter, I ran to double-check that Pinkie Pie is still here in Ponyville. I found her working in the bakery, as usual. So unless you've found one of Pinkie's mirror pool clones, the Pinkie Pie who's with you must be a—
"CHANGLING!" Shining Armor shouted. "Send her to the dungeons!"
"I'm not a chain link!" Pinkie Pie protested, as the royal guards tackled her and covered her with chains. "I'm not any type of fence!"
"There will be no mercy for you, minion of Chrysalis!" Shining Armor said, slamming his hooves on the ground. "Let the foul creature starve to death!"
"This is all a huge misunderstanding!" Pinkie said. "I'm not really a pony! I just wanted to find a cute cowboy boyfriend!"
"She admits she's not a pony?" Princess Cadance gasped. "Then she must be a changling!"
"No, I'm a hu—" Pinkie said. She was cut off in mid-sentence, when one of the ponies knocked her unconscious.