//------------------------------// // Beast Busters // Story: The Perilous Childhood Adventures of Bb and Cady // by PonyPon //------------------------------// Blueblood winced at the book at his hooves. It depicted the living arrangements of the things Celestia had invited to the castle. To talk of diplomacy and other "Big Pony" things. What were they called again? Zeebas? Something like that. In the book Blueblood had managed to grab from the royal library before being sent to his room, the creatures were said to live on a landmass far across the ocean. It was apparently filled with beasts worse than Equestria had to offer, and they resigned to living in the most filthy of places. Villages in jungles, where every building was a thick tree, hollowed out to make room. Enormous structures that seemed more ruins than places where ponies were meant to live. Cave systems. Caves! for goodness' sake! The prince sincerely wondered what made them live that way. Too many monsters elsewhere, perhaps? He did wonder where he could get stripes like theirs, though. Very stylish. There was a knock at his door. He wondered who it could be. Celestia couldn't possibly be done with the diplomats, and it was far too early for dinner to be ready. "Who ish-?" SLAM! "BB!" Cadance swooped in excitedly, a manic look on her face. "We have to-, there's a-, we can-, eeeeee!" She stammered. Blueblood just raised an eyebrow at her. She was forgetting something rather essential. "What? Oh! Right." She got into position, landing and facing the prince as he stood up. Sunshine, sunshine, they chanted as they pranced. Ladybugs awake. Clap your hooves, And do a little shake! Completing the ritual, Cadance leapt upon her brother, giggling all the while. Blueblood loved their secret hoof shake. It made him feel so special to have something that only he and his sister shared. "Okay, Blues. You know those zebra dudes that Celestia invited?" "Yesh." "And they were bringing her some weird zebra present?" "Yeah." "It's been stolen!" "Oh, no!" "I know!" She leapt up from Blueblood and came gracefully down, facing away from him. "And we're..." she began before turning around rather quickly. "...going to find the lowlife responsible!" "What?!" Blueblood yelped in surprise. Him? Go and find some ruffian who was capable of infiltrating Canterlot Castle and probably get injured severely all for a piece of wood?! Blueblood shook his head strongly and darted under his bed. He was very thankful to Neat Freak for dusting it so thoroughly. He was soon followed by Cadance. "Oh c'mon, Bb!" "No! I won't go and get hurt for a shtupid zeeba mashk!" he wailed. She groaned. "Bb, listen. Celestia would be very grateful if somepony could track the beast down and retrieve the mask, wouldn't she?" Blueblood considered this. Such an act of courage would make his auntie proud. "I wouldn't want to do this alone, and besides, you wouldn't want me to go hunt some big, scary monster all by my lonesome, would you?" He sighed. "Indeed not. I'll come with you." "Yay!" ------------------------------------------------------------- Their search began just outside the throne room, where the mask was held just before it was to be presented to the Sun Princess. "Gah! Wow does this thing stink!" Cadance exclaimed, mock-gulping mouthfuls of fresh air. The chest that the mask was kept in had it's lock broken, and indeed smelled of rotted hay and expired milk. "Bb, you've got to smell this!" Blueblood kept his distance from the chest. "Trusht me, I already can." Shrugging, Cadance stuck her head deeper into the zebras' other belongings. "There's got to be some kind of smelly clue in here!" In pursuit of evidence, she unearthed wicked-looking knives, potions that smelled off (but not as bad as the culprit), strange objects of rope and rocks that might have served as weapons, and even a few other masks that were somewhat creepy, but nowhere near as so as the one they were after. They resolved to continue the search in the main hall. But they hit a small snag. "Ugh! Cady, did you roll in the pilfered chesht before you left it?" "What you talkin' bout, B?" she pouted. "Shomething, erk! shmells foul!" "Well it wasn't me!" Reluctantly, the prince took a deeper sniff of the air, gagging on the scent. "It's coming from....thish way!" he struggled to say as he went further down the hall. "Well, lead the way, BluebloodHound!" Cadance chuckled. As Blueblood followed the scent, the smell in the air grew less widespread, but stronger, reaching an apex just outside one of the royal kitchens. They could hear pots pans rustling in a manner nowhere near suited to proper food preparation. "That scum must be in here." Cadance deduced, crouching low. "Get ready to nab him." Blueblood nodded, eager to get back to his room and stuff his poor nose full of soap. "Aaaaand....Go!" She shouted, bursting into the kitchen, with Blueblood in pursuit. "Freeze, dirt bag!" There was a short moment of continued scuffling through dishware. Then, the royal ponies saw the source of it. A hulking, worm-like creature covered in layers of what could easily be mistaken for freezer burnt meat, was bent over, investigating the pantries. The commotion they caused made it turn to them in surprise. "It's wearing the mask!" Cadance shouted. And indeed it was. On the monster's face, a red mask, clearly carved of wood, with protrusions on either side vaguely resembling ears which dangled bits of assorted bone. It's eyeholes were barely visible, as they were centered in burgundy blotches of color. There were even fangs lodged in the bottom of the mask, only increasing the ferocious air of it all. Were he not terrified by the sheer size of the creature, Blueblood would have wondered who on earth would feel thankful for such an ugly gift. Upon sighting them, the creature slowly drew itself up to its full height, which was considerable. It swayed back and fourth, emitting a surprisingly soft sound that was somewhere between a bark and a cough, while the bones on its facial covering rattled menacingly. All in all, it was a rather mediocre attempt at intimidation Cadance, undeterred, spoke up. "Okay, buddy. As a princess of Equestria, I order you to drop that mask. Right now!" The creature, realizing its tactics were ineffective, froze. Cadance stared sternly at it. It slowly leaned to its right, as the princess followed it with her eyes. In a shocking burst of speed, it sped down the kitchen. Heading right into a garbage chute. "We got a runner!" Cadance shouted before diving into an open cupboard. She quickly emerged again, with a spaghetti strainer on her head, and brandishing a large fork. Blueblood stared at her incredulously. "What? Quick helmet and weapon. It's not we can just strut over to the guards' barracks and get the good stuff; we gotta improv, Bb!" "I-I'm shorry. We?" "Uh, yeah. We're following that thing to it's nest, BB. So suit up, Pretty Boy." she said, sliding him a pot just big enough to fit over his head and a wooden spoon. Blueblood had just about had it at this point. Searching for a potentially dangerous thief, fine. Subject his snout to foul odors, okay. Face down some unknown, albeit cowardly beast for a peace of carved wood? He could handle all that. But to brandish kitchenware like some kind of idiotic knight, to follow some rank animal into a lair that was more than likely literal garbage, to fight over said wood piece? The very idea was unbecoming, undignified, and out of the question for any royal, let alone ponies of their caliber. Why didn't he just leave? He could just alert anyone in the castle, anyone at all, and the problem would be dealt with without his involvement. What was stopping him from taking the easy way out? Blueblood looked up and saw Cadance, her enthused smile faded, and looked hurt at his hesitation. The prince smirked and put on his "helmet". The smile returned, fast as lightning. That was why. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- The landing they experienced was thankfully a soft one. One of old newspapers and eggshells, but still soft all the same. Surrounded by all manner of waste, some that could very well be weeks old, their mark had not gone far. A short trot and two accidental trips into puddles of questionable source later, they spotted the beast, mask still in tow, lying quite still in a pile of refuse. Apparently, this was the beast's attempt at camouflage. It wasn't very good at this either. "Alright, let's try this again," Cadance growled, brandishing her fork. "Buddy, you give that mask up and we'll go easy on you. I swear. Three years of living in a dungeon are gonna fly by like-" Splork! Cadance stopped her threat immediately, as the beast had spat some grayish slime directly into her face. It allowed itself a brief chuckle before settling back into it's pile, confident that it had made it's point. Cadance brought her hooves to her face and wiped off the gunk in one swift motion. Once uncovered, her eyes were fiery. "Oh, you are dead meat, mister!" she shouted, and jumped at the beast's covered face, lodging her weapon in the area the beast's nose might have been. Caught off guard, it gave a hoarse yell and reared up, knocking much of its hiding place into disarray. Blueblood, frightened somewhat by it's jerking movements meant to dislodge the princess, backed up fearfully, dropping his spoon. Cadance, meanwhile, was tugging with all her might at her fork, still stuck in the creature's face. With a few twisting, writhing movements of her own, she finally pulled it free. The beast gave one last sweep of it's neck. Cadance flew off it at last. And she took the mask with her. Landing in pile of used flour sacks, she hollered with triumph. "Ha! We got it back! In your fa..." Cadance halted her victory taunt. Blueblood was at a loss for words describing what he saw the mask was covering. The creature's true face was unlike anything they had ever seen. The entirety of the top was carpeted in warts. It had strips of flesh dangling over it's nose. It's teeth were a mess, jutting out over the lower jaw, crooked and uneven. It seemed to have only fleshy pits where it's ears should have been, and it's eyes were sunken in, the face contorted to give it a permanently worried expression. Blueblood preferred the mask, to be quite honest. And he made the point quite clear when he found his voice. "It'sh....hideoush!" "Yeah....no kidding." Cadance said distantly, thrown off by the beast's appearance. The beast sniffled, but it slowly slithered forward, clearly meaning to do harm. "I mean it, Cady! We are in a garbage dump, and I honeshtly think he'sh the worsht-looking thing here! He'sh in a class all hish own in terms of uglinessh!" The beast stopped it's assault. It seemed tears were welling up in it's eyes. The prince noticed. "Uh, yeah!" He yelled, boldly stepping forth, trying to intimidate the beast. "You're the worsht thing I've ever sheen in my young life! I've sheen puke that looked more handshome than you!" The beast's tear's grew more prominent, and a faint hissing nose could be heard. "You're vile! Atrocioush! An affront to Auntie's shun and everything under it!" There was a quite audible hissing coming from the beast as smoke began to rise from it's eyes. It's volume was only matched by the beast's own inelegant blubbering. Blueblood, delighting in the creature's sensitivity, decided to land his killing blow. He got as close to the beast as he dared, looked it in the eye, and whispered just loud enough for it to hear. "No one loves you." The beast gave a great wail that practically blew him away, sending him tumbling towards Cadance. It wailed, grieved, and sobbed miserably. The prince's words, it seemed, had hit a rather large nerve. It's tears pored fourth in great streams, in incredible volume, covering nearly all of it's snakelike body. And it seemed to eat away at it, turning it's body to liquid as slumped lower and lower into a puddle made of itself. The beast took no heed, as it simply cried and cried itselt hoarse, only to deaden to a near silence as it's head sunk into it's own smoking, hissing pool, eventually disappearing. The young royals simply stared, mouths agape, at the sight of the creature's demise. Blueblood was the first to step fourth, picking up his long forgotten weapon and tossing it experimentally into the creature's remains. It quickly sank, leaving a short burst of bubbles where it landed. "Whoa." Cadance said, shocked. She looked down at her brother, slowly breaking into a wide grin. "Way to go, Bb! I mean, forget guards! Nobody will want to mess with you after that!" "You...really think sho?" "Think so? Blueblood, you took that thing down without even touching it! You killed it with just words! That's one awesome power you got there!" Blueblood gave her the smallest of smiles as she gathered up the mask, slightly damaged from her attack, but mostly ok. "C'mon Bb! Let's get this back up top where it belongs." ---------------------------------------------------------------------- The zebra were overjoyed to have the mask back. At least, Blueblood thought they were. He couldn't understand a word they were saying. They did seem rather grateful that two members of royalty had seen personally to retrieving it and punishing the culprit. They even seemed eager to shake Blueblood's hoof. He figured Cadance must have informed them of his part in the affair. But the excitement was over and Blueblood could think of no greater way to celebrate than soaking in a bubble bath for several hours. He was beyond filthy. Just before reaching his room, however, he bumped into a much larger, very white figure. "Blueblood!" Celestia exclaimed. "What on earth is that smell? Have you been rolling in garbage?!"