Thirty Minutes Shy

by Esle Ynopemos


12: No, Ma'am, We're Ponies [Adventure] [Comedy]

((Prompt: It’s a hundred and six miles to Canterlot, we’ve got a full barrel of cider, half a pack of Timberwolves behind us, it’s eternal night, and we’re wearing the Elements of Harmony.

Hit it.))

“Darlings, I know that you're putting your all into it, and we really do appreciate your efforts,” Rarity said, steadying her element against her chest as a bump jostled everypony, “but if you could move just a little bit faster, we would all appreciate not being eaten by angry timberwolves.”

“If you wanna pull the wagon, be my guest,” Rainbow Dash growled through her harness. Next to her, Fluttershy simply whimpered as the rickety old apple-cart thundered along behind them down the dusty, unlit road. Snarls and howls sounded entirely too close behind the six ponies as they tore off into the unnatural night.

Applejack threw a rock, eliciting a yip from the pack of predators. “An' whose fault is it, again, that they're angry timberwolves instead of regular-type, give-up-on-chasin'-ya-after-a-mile ones?”

“Hey, how was I supposed to know that was their den?” Rainbow shot back defensively. “It just looked like a pile of sticks!”

“Um, you can tell by the coloration,” Fluttershy supplied. “A regular pile of sticks is usually dry and brown. If it's made of green, living branches, it's a timberwolf den.”

“This is a fascinating conversation,” Rarity said, gripping the side of the cart for dear life, “but may I reiterate my suggestion that we go faster now!”

The pegasi drawing the cart pounded their hooves against the road. Trees whizzed by on either side.

“Why are we even trying to get there by hoof, anyway?” panted Rainbow. “Can't Twilight just magic us there?”

“Sure, that'd be a great plan,” Applejack said, “If Twi weren't sleepin' off the mother of all hangovers!”

A loud snore echoed from the bottom of the cart. Twilight lay there, the Element of Magic resting askew on her face. Spike crouched next to her, shaking her shoulders, but if all the bouncing of the apple-cart wasn't enough to wake her, his efforts didn't have much chance.

“Twilight parties hard!” Pinkie remarked, a gleam of pride in her eyes. “I've never seen a pony down that much cider before!”

“Ya did tell her it was the hard stuff before ya gave it to her, right Pinkie?”

“Oh. Oops!”

Fluttershy looked up ahead. The only source of light was the moon, which glowered down on them with a menacing silver glow. But it was enough for her to make out the lip of the cliff up ahead. Where there should have been a bridge, there was just a couple wooden posts and a loose rope.

“R-Rainbow...” she stammered.

“I see it,” Rainbow Dash replied.

“Then why are we speeding up?”

In response, Rainbow raised her wings. Fluttershy swallowed hard and spread her own as well.

“Hang on tight, everypony,” Rainbow called back to them. “I wanna try something I read in a Daring Do book...”