A makeshift High Court had been erected in Ponyville's town square. Princesses Celestia and Luna sat atop a high marble dais, flanked by Cadance and Shining Armor. A huge crowd of ponies filled every open inch of the square, whispering and murmuring amongst themselves. On a raised wooden platform, Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Applejack stood, flanked by a squadron of Royal Guards. Nooses had been fitted around their necks.
Celestia cleared her throat. "The Court will now read the charges. Applejack, you are charged with two hundred counts of malicious mischief. Rarity, you are charged with three counts of child abuse and three counts of unlawful exploitation of minors. Rainbow Dash, you are charged with abuse of office as a member of the Weather Patrol. Fluttershy, you are charged with six hundred and one counts of malicious mischief and four thousand counts of misdemeanor petty theft. Pinkie Pie, you are charged with high treason and the abduction of Equestrian royalty. Twilight Sparkle, you are charged with felony theft of magic, felony release of evil creatures from Tartarus, three hundred counts of unlawful confinement, six hundred counts of endangerment of fellow ponies, and two hundred counts of illegal use of dark magic. How do you plead?"
"Guilty," the six ponies chorused, heads hung in shame.
"Let the record show that the defendants have entered a plea of guilty," Celestia said sternly. "It is the determination of the High Court of Equestria that the defendants are hereby sentenced to hang by the neck until red."
Twilight blinked. "Wait, what?"
The guards QUICKLY leapt away from the gallows as several hundred gallons of red velvet cake batter fell out of nowhere, completely coating the six mares.
All of Ponyville laughed uproariously.
The nooses floated off their necks, and the gallows disappeared. The Princesses boarded their royal carriages and returned to Canterlot.
"Ugh!" Rarity complained. "It'll take FOREVER to get this mess out of my coat and mane!"
"Hey, better red than dead," Rainbow Dash said. "Oh, and Pinkie Pie?"
"Yes?"
"Run."
"EEP!"
* * * * *
That night, as Pinkie Pie dreamed of candy and cupcakes and zebras who called her Kevin, Princess Luna appeared from behind a candy cane the size of a redwood tree.
"Hiya, Lunie!" Pinkie exclaimed, waving.
"Good evening to you, Pinkie Pie," the Princess of the Night replied. "We wish to thank thee for thy assistance. Thanks to thee, We knowest now what to expect in the event the Nightmare or other dark forces should ever possess those who bear the Elements of Harmony."
"Oh, it was nothing," Pinkie replied. "Glad I could help. Although, I don't really think you have anything to worry about. Well, except if Twilight turns evil for real. I mean, that was kinda messed up."
"Indeed," Luna replied. "We are wondering if perhaps Our sister should consider returning Twilight Sparkle to Magic Kindergarten..."
"Nah, I have a better idea."
"Oh?" Luna asked, eyebrow raised.
Pinkie showed the Night Princess her very special, very inappropriate toy.
"That is...quite...creative...We must be going now. Farewell!"
* * * * *
Twilight descended the stairs the next morning to find a giftwrapped package sitting in the middle of the library. "Oh? What's this?" She opened it with her magic...
Twilight screamed.
THE END