Luna awoke from her lotion-filled money sleep. She slowly got up and shook out the smurfs out of her mane. They screamed their little smurfy screams as they flew into her pet Mango's mouth, never to be seen again. Luna's new boyfriend ran into the room, screaming something about toast. She ignored him and stroked her pomegranate.
The Prince then walked into the room and said " What a swagtastical day in swagville. How do you swag, my dear Luna?"
Luna rolled her head in a circle as she replied " Sweeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrvvve!"
The prince left, saying something about twerking and yolo.
Luna began the journey to her veranda, which would allow her to raise the sun. She strutted what her P-90X workout allowed her to strut, which wasn't much, considering the fact that she only did P-1/2X. She still had pride in herself and that was truly, all that mattered.
As she began her wobbly walk, she sang in a Beautiful voice that caused several woodland creatures to implode:
"I have a passionate affair in my trousers, and I am not afraid to allow it to be viewed. I am sexually attractive, and am aware of said fact."
She finally reached the end of her catwalk, and her calves were burning! She took a short, three minute, break on some guards back. It was later found out that the guard had sunken three floors down. She finally made it to her veranda, and looked out over her subjects. There were thousands!
"Citizens of my fair city. I will now bring you Celestia's Bedroom!" She addressed them, and was met with hungry cheers.
She walked back to her bed, which seemed much closer, now that she looked at the five feet from the other direction. Never the less, she began the trek to her sisters room.
Luna applied the needed spells, and got the booth in place outside Celestia's room.
It seemed that today, Celestia had bought a new game. "Twerk Twerk Revolution". It seemed to work out her thighs very well. Luna decided to borrow it later.
Ponies began streaming in as the guards opened the doors. Those poor guards didn't make it out of the slowly moving crowd in time. R.I.P. Those two guards no one knew.
The crowds flowed in smoothly, and Luna filmed as usual. Eventually, there was a predicament.
Luna was stealing cookies with her hair, when Celestia began walking towards the door. A reporter screamed out "Hashtag, Ruuuuuuuuun!!!!!"
Luna yelled " Everyone act natural!", and so it was.
Celestia walked out of her room to see completely ordinary ponies doing completely ordinary things.
About fifteen ponies were doing Zumba. Five were twerking. Three were break dancing. Luna was Playing with a ball of yarn. The prince was on his back, opening and closing his arms, while screaming " Photosynthesis! Photosynthesis!"
A completely normal day in her kingdom. She helped herself to about five tubs of ice-cream, and headed back to her room.
"That was close" They all said in unison.
"Okay ponies. Back to work." And so it was!
Luna then continued waking up in a new Bugatti.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!" Luna screeched.
"What's wrong?!" Screamed some reporters in confusion.
"Oh. Sorry, it takes a while to get used to being this sexy." She replied.
"I know, right?!" Replied the Prince.
After about five hours of Twerk Twerk revolution, Celestia decided it was time for some 'Spike makes advances on Twilight'
Spike began his slow ascension up the stairs to Twilight's room. He noted that she was still completely engrossed in the mountain of books that towered over her concentrating form. She seemed so caught up in her studies, that she most likely wouldn't even register the presence of her young, scale gilded stalker.
Now was his chance.
Spike slowly lowered himself into a hunters crawl, his small form concentrating all of his muscle power on making no noise. He set out on this epic journey -which he had been planning for months to terminate any hint of failure- that would give him his greatest desire: The chance to smack Twilight in the face with dirty underwear.
The viewers were completely focused on the game, and how could they not be? This was the most heart-felt, tear-jerking, sad story of a boy and his dream, that they didn't notice Luna and her crew pickpocketing them for everything they had, except one penny each.
Luna wasn't heartless.
Celestia carefully mashed the #%$& out of every button on her controller, in hopes that it would completely conceal the miniscule purple dragon stalking his pastel prey.
Her hopes became realities, as the baby dragon slowly, ever so slowly, crawled across the floor to his sister/mother/aunt. He lifted his body ever-so-slightly to avoid any noise being created by his scales, and it was as though he wasn't even there.
Celestia was so close to her goal. She could taste the dirty underwear on Twilight's face at this point.
*ClickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickScyk*
~Ingame~
*Unspeakably loud fart noise*
"SpiiiiiIIIIIIKE!"
Twilight screams as she spots the small adolescent with the underwear in his claws, poised positioning for a pounce at her head was obvious in his stance.
"It was Owluicious!"
"Owluicious! This means the pound!"
"Whoowhat the @*&%!?"
"Son of a Luna *%$&#*% &^% $%^& Mother %$^#$%" Celestia screamed, once the cutscene ended.
Now Twilight's face would never receive it's underwear christening.
"She sure does curse a lot." Luna observed.
Luna went back to being a scatman.
"Yeeeeeehaaaaaaaw" A guard yelled.
"Scitbootiboopeddybopizooplow." Luna responded.
"Can't talk. Going for the belt!" The guard replied.
Applejack then bucked the living hell out of his face, with great passion.
"Ain't nopony jackin' mah tahtle." She said after a few more good bucks to the spleen.
"Luna, help me!" The guard plead.
"Hhhhhhhmmmmmm Ooooooookaaaaaaay." She said in exasperation.
Luna then slapped Applejack with a wad of rolled up money, and led her down the entire hall and out of the castle, all the while screaming; "Bad Applejack. Bad pony. Bad. No more pie for you!"
To which Applejack responded; "Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
Buuuuuuuuuut, Luna didn't care. Applejack would get no pie. Pie is for good ponies. Ponies who help Luna overthrow her sister. Ponies who help Luna set up that garage band she's been wanting to do. Ponies who would cuddle with Luna. Ponies who wo- Hold on.....Luna just gave me something.......Ponies who like long walks in the beautiful, sexy, sexy, sexy, amazing, sexy, awesome, Very sexy, sexy, majestic, sexy, fun, cool, great, sexy, Unfathomably sexy, moonlight.
The Prince trotted into his room, for he had urgent business to attend to. He walked to his bed, lay down his crown, Sunglasses, other sunglasses, other other sunglasses, Jesus Christ how many sunglasses, five paragraphs of sunglasses, and finally, his emergency superlotio.
Finally, the Prince lay down his last pair of sunglasses, and himself on the bed.
"Aah." He sighed in pure happiness.
'Finally away from that one creepy guard.' He said to himself
"You said my name your highness?" Said a guard, seemingly appearing from thin air.
"....." The prince said, while staring at his new guest.
"......" She replied.
"Wanna buck?" She asked.
"Hex yeah, I do!" He replied.
They then proceeded to buck every tree in Equestria, as mothers shielded their children's eyes, protecting their innocent minds from the display ahead of them.
Luna grabbed her jar of moneys from the table beyond Celestia's door, as she made the table disappear, and went to bed. Each of the fans, reporters, and the Prince followed suit.
"G'night." They each echoed as they went to their respectable homes/rooms.
Luna inched herself into bed, and prepared for a night of money filled lotion, and lotion filled money.
She activated 'sleepy' mode on her flat screen, and slept peacefully.
The Prince climbed into bed, and lay down with his new companion, who seemed to be peacefully asleep.
'Today has been a good day. I feel great to have such a fun new life, and it's all thanks to the fact that I decided to come to the castle for that first job.....' The Prince thought as he drifted off to sleep.
Luna's boyfriend shifted his weight from side to side, as his mind filled with a nightmare unlike any he had ever experienced.
Celestia turned off her game system, and allowed herself to make her way to the bed in her chambers.
She had a big day ahead of her tomorrow, and needed plenty of rest.