Twilight Sparkle Runs Out of Toilet Paper

by Star Plasma


The Tough Decision

Spike paced around the library uncomfortably. Rarity had asked if he could help her with some clothes a while ago, and he was supposed to be at the boutique by now. As a matter if fact, he would be, if only...

Spike changed his course and walked toward the bathroom. It was a secret that only he knew. The reason why Twilight would often spend more than an hour in the bathroom each time she went.

She read a book every time she went.

And Spike knew what responses his questions would receive while Twilight was reading books. Anything he asked would be answered by a "Uh-huh", or an "Okay".

He wanted to be sure that Twilight knew that he was going to Rarity's, and that he would not be back at the library for a while. Owowicious was gone too; Twilight had sent him to get a bunch of stuff a while ago, and he was going to need some help carrying it all back once he was done. But that wouldn't be for a while.

Spike stood outside of the bathroom door, his patience wearing thin. He knew that Twilight wasn't going to be out for a while, thanks to Princess Celestia. The Princess had discovered a spell book inside the depths of the Castle Library, and she had sent it to Twilight so she could study it.

It was also a very large spellbook.

Spike's patience was just about up, but then...

"SPIKEY-WIKEY!!!" was called from outside and followed by some pounding on the door. Time to go!

"Twilight! I'm going to Rarity's!" the purple dragon shouted to the bathroom door. Spike pressed his ear up to the door to hear Twilight's answer.

"Uh-huh."

Spike sighed and walked out of the library.

* * *

Twilight sat on the toilet, completely absorbed in this new spellbook. She was ever so grateful to her mentor for sending the book, but she also wondered how much longer she would be in the bathroom. She would often read a book from start to finish on the think-tank, but if that were the case with the spellbook, she would be on the toilet for a really long time.

Twilight decided to finish up, but then something interesting caught her eye. One of the spells was written in some weird ancient language that Twilight didn't know.

She flipped the page. Same strange language. She looked at the next page. Same language. Twilight flipped through the entire book and was shocked to discover that the whole 2nd half was written in the ancient language.

Fascinating, Twilight thought.

The lavender mare decided to have Spike write a letter to the princess once she was out of the bathroom. These spells needed to be deciphered right away. Twilight yawned and looked around.

Twilight looked next to the toilet. The toilet paper holder had nothing more than an empty roll with a couple ripped sheets of toilet paper hanging off of it.

Twilight rolled her eyes and cursed Spike. She opened the bathroom cabinet with her magic and peered inside. No toilet paper.

Twilight began to search around frantically for toilet paper. Her eyes desperately searched the entire bathroom, but no toilet paper was to be found. Twilight's face lit up as an idea popped into her head.

"SPIIIIIKE!" she called. It was simple! She would have Spike run down to the store and buy some toilet paper, and then he would come back and give it to her and she would be out before tomorrow! Only one problem...

Spike wasn't answering her, and she didn't hear his footsteps either. Where had that dragon gone?

Twilight looked at the toilet paper holder with an angry look on her face. She swore to always check the toilet paper holder before she sat down on the toilet, and she vowed to keep the cabinet stocked with toilet paper all the time.

Being stuck on the toilet changes a pony. It causes you to think like you never have before.

Twilight flipped through the spellbook again, hoping that there was a spell to create toilet paper out of nowhere or something. It would be the most amazing spellbook in Equestria if it did, but Twilight slammed the book down on the floor when she discovered that she hadn't overlooked anything.

She facehoofed and sighed. She opened one eye and looked down at the book, cringing at the idea that popped into her head.

Desperate times called for desperate measures, and this was a desperate time indeed.

She opened the book that she threw on the floor. She struggled to decide which pages to tear out, then decided that it would be better if she tore out the ones with the ancient writing. Not like she could read them anyway.

Besides, how important could they be?

Twilight tore out some pages of the 2nd half of the book, and each page she tore out sounded like a pony that was getting murdered. At least they did to her. Twilight wondered what she would've rather done; killed a pony, or tore out pages from the innocent spellbook.

After she tore out the desired amount of pages, Twilight wiped. With each wipe, it felt like she was killing a pony. After bearing through the pain of it all, Twilight let out a sigh of relief.

It was over. It was finally over.

Or so she thought...

* * *

The Next Day...

Twilight Sparkle woke up with the sun shining on her face. She was so happy to have yesterday's ordeal behind her, and she honestly wasn't even that mad at Spike! Speaking of which, she needed to make sure that he went to go get some toilet paper soon.

Twilight didn't see the little dragon in his bed, so she figured that he had gotten up early to do some chores. Twilight jumped out of her bed and hurried downstairs.

"SPIII-" Twilight called, but was then cut off by a knock at the door. Twilight was about to go answer it, but Spike beat her to it.

The dragon opened the door to reveal... "Princess Celestia?" Twilight asked.

What could she be doing here? Why was she... Oh.

Twilight had tried her best to put the incident behind her, but she should have known that it would come back to haunt her.

Princess Celestia smiled when she saw Twilight. "Twilight, did you go through that spellbook I sent to you?"

Twilight nodded.

"Great! Tell me what you discovered."

"Well, the first half of the book contained some pretty interesting spells. The second half was written in some ancient language..."

Celestia's ears perked up at this. "Really? Can you show me?"

Twilight retrieved the book from her desk and showed the ancient language to Princess Celestia. The Princess studied it for a while, flipping back and forth between the pages.

"Twilight. This all appears to be one spell, but it doesn't make any sense. The second page is completely irrelevant to the first one. It's as if some pages are missing or something." Princess Celestia said, disappointed.

Twilight shuffled her hooves nervously.

"Twilight? Do you know what happened to the pages?" Celestia asked.

Twilight sighed.

"It's a long story..."