Zombies: Richtofen

by Enderstorm


Drei

A few seconds earlier...

Rarity and Fluttershy, haven woken up on the floor of Twilight's library, were just about to head outside when they heard some yelling.

"FUCK YOU, MAXIS!"

Rarity looked horrified, and Fluttershy was just about to cry. Nopony has ever used such profane language. The closest one got to swearing was saying 'buck', and even that was rarely used in Ponyville to avoid upsetting the Apple Family, who bucked trees all day. Hard.

Back outside, everypony else looked horrified, save Pinkie who was still dancing around the crater, but keeping her distance. She didn't want a repeat of that incident again...

Once the stallion calmed down a bit, Pinkie got as close as she could and started spouting forth her welcome speech. "Hi, my name's Pinkie Pie and I just saw you drop out of the sky and I've never saw you before-- silly me you just dropped out of the sky-- oh wait I just said that, nevermind the point is I can see 115 reasons why you should stay here and not fly back away to Griffinville on the moon. One, because I haven't thrown you a welcome party yet..." Pinkie kept rambling on and on, until everypony just decided to leave.

Fluttershy wanted to leave. Just hide in her house until the strange pony left. But her Element was telling her to be kind. So that's what she did. And she kinded the hell out of quietly asked Pinkie to stop talking so she could help the poor olive-green stallion in the crater. But Pinkie wouldn't stop. Not when she was on Reason 14 of 115 Reasons Why You Should Stay Here and Not Fly Back Away to Griffinville on the Moon.

So Fluttershy asked again, a bit louder and firmer. "Umm, c-can you please stop talking? I mean, if it's not too much trouble...

But Pinkie was on reason 17 of 115 Reasons Why You Should Stay Here and Not Fly Back Away to Griffinville on the Moon.

The green stallion looked as though he'd had enough. He cleared his throat a bit then yelled in Germane.

"Halt den Mund! Dummkopf!" Shut up! Idiot!

Fluttershy, being able to speak a bit of Germane after her brief stint with Photo Finish, understood exactly what he just said. Apparerntly Pinkie understood too, because she halted in midair.

The stallion continued. "It dosen't look like I can go anyvere... and a better question. Vhy am I a pony? Talking to other ponies?"

Pinkie began to explain before getting an olive hoof to the face. "Nein, don't speak. Please.. Your voice is worse zen ze voices in my head..." He began to trail off before speaking again. "Ze voices! Zey are gone!"

Suddenly the olive pony was lifted up in a magenta glow out of the crater, and in front of a purple unicorn with a look of childish glee on her face. "Who are you? What's your name? Oh cool! You're a unicorn! How many spells do you know? What's your cutie mark mean?" Twilight started bombarding him with questions before getting an orange hoof in her mouth. "Twi, why don't ya let 'im explain before you start askin' questions?"

"Oh, alright..."

Everypony looked at the olive green stallion expectantly.

"Vhat?" They kept staring.

"Zis is getting awkward..." They kept staring.

He sighed. "I von't tell you my name. But you can guess if you really-"

"Oh oh! I know!" Pinkie started jumping with her hoof raised in the air. "Is it, Olive? Or Toffee? OH OH, IT'S RIC-" The rest of Pinkie's names got muffled by an orange hoof. "Pinkie, Ah don't think you know his name." Deadpanned Applejack.

Pinkie just spat the hoof out. "IT'S RICK TOFFEE! No, wait..." Pinkie just trailed off while "Rick Toffee" stared with wide eyes. 'How did she know zat much?' He thought to himself.

"Close, but no. EET'S RICHTOFEN!" Richtofen just had another voice spasm.

Now everypony stared at Pinkie. How did she know that?

"Pinkie, darling. How in Equestria did you come so close to his name?" Asked Rarity.

"Rick Toffee was my grandfather! He looked just like Richtofen here. He might of been a unicorn, but he could make some of the best toffee ever! The secret ingredient was what made it so tasty." Pinkie paused for a bit. "You wanna know the secret ingredient?" Everypony, even Richtofen, nodded. Pinkie's smile disappeared for a second before coming back on. "It was the 115th element on the periodic table!"

Richtofen just gasped. 'So zis pink ponie knows what element 115 is! Zat will make zis a bit easier. Though I will still need ze Golden Rod and Focusing Stone if I want to overthrow Maxis. And kill him zis time.'