//------------------------------//
// Implicit Fear 
// Story: Thing a Day 
// by Rennoc215 
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Thing a day: Implicit Fear

There she goes, walking under the cherry trees again. I watch her pace home, her sweet softness drawing me in like a moth to a flame. But who am I, how dare I? I'm just a simple colt, she has to be a goddess of some sort. She may not have wings, or a horn, but her divinity is in her mind, and her face. The way she smiles, it melts the permafrost encasing my heart, and her laugh causes flowers to bloom in the frosty winter.

And who am I? A nopony, just another face in the sea of faces. There are always other fish in the sea, they say, and I'm just another little fish. Sure, my pals all like me, and I'm not boring, or somepony you could forget, and still... I'm nothing. I may bring smiles, and I might be kind, but I'm still just another fish.

To top it all off, I'm an omega, I don't mind anything. Ponies could call me names, and I'll laugh and go along with it. They could insult my face, and I'd make a joke of it. Sure, it might sting to see them view me like that, but that pain is temporary, and a smile can brighten just about anyponies day.

So it's natural, I guess. Something primal stirring behind a logical mind, a feeling so alien to me that my mind can't quite comprehend it. It's a kind of desire, but nothing like a fleeting want like I'm used to. Nay, it's something stronger, more permanant than that.

So there she stands, under the cherry trees. This is it, I tell myself. This is when I'll ask. I slowly pace closer, before I turn off, and pretend to inspect the cherry tree beside me. Wait, why am I doing this? I was about to ask her, I ask myself. I turn again, and look at her once more. Just a few steps, I whisper to myself. A few steps more.

And yet, when I am just there, right behind her, I can't bring myself to raise my hoof to stop her. Why? Why can't I ask? Is some spectral force stopping me? Am I not fit for such a gemstone?

I shake my head, and lift my hoof. But I still can't bring myself to get her attention. So I stop, and she slowly walks further off while I'm talking with myself. Why? I ask. Why can't I ask her?

So I think about it. What's stopping me? Is something wrong? It has to be apprehension, but at what? What am I worried about? Am I afraid that she'd reject me?

...

Actually, that makes a lot of sense. I can see it lacing through my past, a fear I never realized. Why I'm slow to ask about things, even when I want them... and even when I desire them, they still aren't within my grasp. Perhaps I ask when I'm around people I'm incredibly close with, but that has to be my innermost circle: Family, and the closest of friends.

But it isn't like I've ever trully been refused, so why am I afraid? Is it part of something more? Is it a part of my fear of change? Am I afraid of change? Maybe that's why: I haven't ever been crushed by a simple 'no', and so I'm afraid of what it would feel like. But if I never ask, then I'll never get to, I remind my self. So I take a deep breath, and turn to face where she was walking...

And I stare right into her gorgeous eyes. "Hey, Condor. I saw you were following me, and I wanted to know what's up?" She asks, cracking that ever so sweet smile.

I've lost my voice, and my mouth simply locks itself shut. Do it! I shout to myself, before gulping once. "H-hey," I stutter. "I was wondering if..." I pause, trying to find the words.

"You want to go with me to the Grand Galloping Gala?" She offers, tilting her head with a wink. I'm stunned, and my mouth hangs open slightly. How, how, how? I mentally stammer, before she cracks that smile again, balming my mind. "I'd love to."