HUMAN in Equestria: A Conversion Bureau Story

by Chatoyance

8. The Court Of Sun And Moon

8. The Court Of Sun And Moon

Special thanks to my spouse Aedina for her assistance with historically accurate Elizabethan speech.

Tagtail the Obsequious waited for Somnolence to complete the delicate telekinetic separation of frozen bodies. Somnolence The Intrepid was the supreme telekineticist of the Royal Unicorn Corps, and only he could perform such a precise and demanding task.

Somnolence sent his mind down, deep, into the dweonicular layers, and performed a simple spell which he crafted on the spot. It was a cantrip that searched for dweonicules that made up the flesh of the frozen human child called 'Seraphina' and defined them as separate from the flesh of the only partially frozen child called 'Asher'. Once a boundary between the two had been established, the thin layer between the surfaces was caused to become warm so as to melt. This made lifting 'Seraphina' away from 'Asher' much simpler. The two children had been frozen together.

Once the two bodies were separated, Tagtail the Obsequious began his supreme medical arts. The human filly was entirely frozen, every cell within her body ruptured by ice crystals. Continuing his scan, Tagtail determined that the body of the human filly, combined with the insulating properties of a red coat, had preserved the head and torso of the human colt. She had apparently sacrificed her life for the young human. Tagtail noted the nobility of the act.

The human colt was still alive, though his arms and legs were entirely frozen, as was the flesh of his ears and most of his face. The interior of the body and the entirety of the brain had not frozen, and could be saved, though whether that would be a mercy to be granted or a curse to be avoided was something the princesses would have to decide.

Tagtail had already treated the other human fillies and colts. One of the fillies had escaped nearly unscathed, with only a broken and lacerated upper foreleg and assorted contusions. That human's name was 'Petra'. The remaining three fillies and colts other than critically injured 'Asher' and the deceased 'Seraphina' had survived, after a fashion, but could not live long.

A filly called 'Isla' had been carried bodily by a large human colt named 'Oliver' until the latter's legs and abdomen had turned to ice. 'Oliver' was being kept alive only by constant thaumatic support, performed by two of Tagtail's best medical mages. Without the constant concentration of the two unicorns, 'Oliver' would perish within moments. The Royal Corps had arrived almost too late as it was.

The human filly 'Isla' would lose her arms, legs and face, but she would survive, thanks to the impressive effort of the colt who had carried her, then held her above the grasping frost. The astonishing love, dedication, and self sacrifice of the young aliens had, for the first time, begun to make Tagtail reconsider his personal belief that Celestia had been mistaken in trying to save the humans. If this was what their young were capable of, then perhaps their kind had been worth the terrible disruption and cost to Equestria in order to rescue them.

A human colt, designated 'Milo' was also alive, though only his head and half of his chest. He too was on thaumatic support.

Of the four pigs, only Tourt Pière had survived. The other three, Penderloin, Cutler and Hamton had perished, turned entirely to ice by the defensive act of the Snow Bunny the team had found in the jaws of the frozen Displacer Beast. From appearances, the Snow Bunny was civilized, dressed in performer's clothing, and likely had sacrificed herself in an attempt to save the others in and around the clearing.

It was fortunate the three pigs had perished - it was they who, after their deaths, alerted the princesses to the tragic scene. Within seconds of that posthumous message, the Royal Unicorn Corps had been dispatched.

There had been three chickens. Two had been turned to ice, but the third, Cluckalina, had thought of leaping and catching a branch with claw and beak. Cleverly, she had worked her way up the tree limb just ahead of the expanding zone of frost, and had survived only with minor injuries, easily treated by simple tissue regenesis.

The human colts and fillies, however, were a daunting problem. Tagtail the Obsequious was the Royal Thaumatic Chirurgeon, the ultimate specialist in medicine for all of Equestria - under the princesses, of course - and he found himself unable to figure out anything to do about the humans. He had no idea how the creatures even worked, much less what magical procedures to use on them.

Some ponies had been sent into the human world to work at the Bureaus, and some of them had learned aspects of human medicine. It was also possible that there were newfoals who had been Chirurgeons on 'earth' who could be contacted to assist. The true issue, however, was time.

Tagtail's medical unicorns would eventually begin to weary of constantly supporting the lives of the injured. Support could not be maintained indefinitely. Tagtail began to consider alternatives. The most promising in his mind was conversion to stone. The human foals could be kept indefinitely as statues, preserved against death, until a means of restoring them entirely could be devised.

If only the reclusive humans in their little fortress would have allowed medical unicorns to study them! Time and again they had refused any such investigation or contact.

Tagtail sighed and approached the rescue team leader, Night Watcher the Ponderous, mentally preparing how to phrase his plan to stabilize the dying human foals through medical lithification.

Petra sat on the bejewled, marble bench, numbly staring at Plantain. Collyrium, the medical unicorn currently regenerating Petra's arm, gave her a smile. "Just a little more, dear. I want to make sure the bone is nice and strong."

Petra glanced at the twisted, malformed scar down her arm where the Beast had raked her with its claw. Collyrium had apologized over and over for not being able to make the scar go away. Apparently she had never seen a human before, and the way human cells worked were a puzzle to her. She was able to get the cells to grow, but what appeared had been lumpen white and foamy yellow flesh quite unlike Petra's normal skin. Petra knew enough to recognize it as forms of scar tissue. She'd read about it in a book before.

No, that wasn't right. She'd seen it on a holo. A doctor show. It didn't matter anyway. Petra planned on having a fresh new body in any case.

"There! It's a bit bumpy inside, the bone I mean, but it's all mended. It shouldn't interfere with movement or cause pain. Try moving your foreleg a bit and see how it feels." Collyrium smiled again, but there was sadness in her eyes. She wanted so desperately to do a perfect job, but humans were confusing somehow.

Petra mechanically lifted and moved her arm. She really didn't care about it. It ached a little, in the bone, but she decided not to mention the fact. "It's great!" Petra's arm twinged. "Just like new!" She tried to put on her best Bettencourt smile, but... for the first time in her life, it wouldn't switch on.

It seemed clear that Collyrium knew Petra wasn't telling the whole truth, but she nodded. The fact was that she was at the limit of her knowledge. Nopony near knew much about humans, and it was an astonishment even to just see one. "I'm... I'm sorry." The medical unicorn turned and began to sadly walk away.

"Please..."

Collyrium turned around.

"Please be happy. You stopped the pain, and that's the only important part. I'll be a pony soon, with a fresh new body. It's okay, really it is!" Petra couldn't stand the idea of the medic feeling bad. Too much sad stuff had happened. It was just overwhelming to Petra that the unicorn might feel bad for trying to help.

Collyrium smiled, as warmly as she could. "I understand." The little human filly had been through so much it just broke her pony heart. "Thank you then! I hope I get to see you after the princess ponifies you!"

"I'd... I'd like that." Petra realized she really would. Right now, every little kindness meant everything it seemed, and if it would make the unicorn medic even a tiny bit happier just to see her as a pony, then that was something to look forward to doing for her.

Plantain seemed far, far away. She wouldn't meet Petra's eyes. She had stopped crying after the first hour since they had been teleported in the big circle of light to what could only be Canterlot castle. Now, the little earthpony just stared off into space. She did stay close to Petra though. That was the one thing that helped. Plantain seemed to want to be close.

Petra reached out and ran her hand gently down Plantain's back. Plantain jerked at the touch, but then relaxed again. Petra continued to pet her pony friend, it was the only thing she could think of to do. Eventually, Plantain leaned against the human girl, and the two sat that way, pressed tightly together on the padded marble bench, for a long, long time.

"We demand that you give our children back!" Stefan Bettencourt was fulfilling his role as the leader of Mankind - all one thousand, three hundred and forty-seven that remained. Minus six.

In the Great Hall, Celestia and Luna held court, assembled from necessity, entirely against protocol, because fifty-seven humans had stormed unbidden into the castle and ended up - after a brief tussle - corralled by the Royal Guards. The battle had been short and almost comical - the humans had gotten in a few good punches to the muzzles of the Guards, and the Guards, for their part, had been very restrained in taking the rowdier Men down. The casualties consisted of a single broken hand - Gérard Hollande had failed to care that the Royal Guards were armored and wore helmets - and a rather large and pretty bowl - now broken - that had been carved from a single emerald.

To prevent being imprisoned for their vandalism, Forrest Arnault had cited a subparagraph of the Covenant that provided for renegotiation of terms during circumstances of disaster, war, or civil insurrection. The clause had been added after the humans had learned about the return of Luna as Nightmare Moon, Discord attacking several times, and other such disturbing events. It had taken more than a little twisting of interpretation to frame the attack of a native predator within a dangerous magical zone as a war. After several hours of standoff, Celestia was finally willing to concede that the children had appeared to craft weapons and did attempt to defend themselves from attack, and that this could be interpreted as 'warfare', within a 'human' context, somehow.

Out of jail and in the courtroom, the humans promptly set Bettencourt to the job they had come for in the first place - getting their children back, plus compensation for their injuries, plus a personal guard under their control. For protection.

"I do not see that you have any standing for making demands, Mister Bettencourt." Celestia was being patient, as she always tried to be, but the fact was that the rude arrival of a small army of the skin apes had disturbed her. "You are aware, of course, of the state of the poor victims?"

The reason for the assault on Canterlot castle had been the message sent to the Human Masada informing the humans there of the discovery of their missing children and of what had befallen them.

"That is why we are here!" Stefan swallowed, and worked harder to keep his emotions in check. "One girl is dead, four children have apparently been turned to stone..." Stefan felt his temper rising in him, but he held it down. The angry rumble behind him indicated the other men and women were having an even harder time controlling themselves. "...and my daughter is in treatment but will be alright."

"Also, there has been the tragic loss of two pigs, two chickens, and a very brave little bunny. Not to mention the death of the Displacer Beast that attacked them."

Stefan stared. "Who cares about pigs and beasts? We have seriously injured humans turned to stone, and..." Stefan caught himself. "We, the human ruling class, as specified in the Covenant, demand the full restoration and return of our offspring, as well as compensation for damages done, and protection in the future against possible dangers. I have here a list of our requirements and..."

Celestia was not interested in hearing more.

"Full restoration of your children is not covered by our contract. Rescue and medical services provided for them are the generous gift of the crown. You have no standing to request compensation or..." Celestia's horn glowed as she telekinetically ripped the list of demands from Bettencourt's hands. She scanned the document briefly. "...armored diamond dog... troops... armed with..."

The glare from Celestia had a settling effect on the room.

"Celestia. Princess Celestia." Stefan decided that a change of tactics was in order. "Our children are dear to us, as they are to any parent, as your subjects are dear to you. We humbly ask you to restore our children to life and limb, and then to send them back to our loving embrace." Stefan didn't, however, get to his position by failing to press. "Surely, it is also reasonable, within such a dangerous world as Equestria clearly is, to have guards - as you have guards - and to have the resources to support such. We implore you, good princess, to consid..."

"You do not need your own standing army. That is not open to discussion, and was, in fact, something you agreed to drop back when your world still stood. Nothing that has happened has in any way reopened that topic. Since you will never have a standing army - in point of law, you are prevented from having or creating a standing army - you certainly do not need additional wealth to support one." Celestia's normally wide and kindly eyes narrowed.

"Additionally, Mister Bettencourt, our Covenant is very, very clear about the issue of defining what humanity is, and is not, and how very important it is to you and yours to remain completely and utterly thus. I do not understand why you persist in demanding full restoration of your children, as doing so would violate your own requirements."

Stefan Bettencourt felt lost. "I don't follow."

"The human girl known as Seraphina Hollande..." Somewhere in the back, Gérard Hollande choked back tears and held his bandaged, but unhealed hand. "...has suffered death by hypothermia. Isla Draghi, Asher Brin, Milo Cameron and Oliver Sachs have all suffered injuries beyond the capability of their bodies to endure. They exist therapeutically transformed into stone, within a state of stasis just moments before death." This somehow seemed to explain everything.

"We know that! I am asking you... I am begging you to repair them. Rebuild their bodies, heal them! Regenerate them and bring Seraphina back to life! You said you were capable of doing that when Rensselaer died! You said restoring humans was simple for you to do!" Stefan looked briefly around at the men of the Masada. He was doing his best. Why was Celestia acting dumb?

"Humans are not magical creatures and shall not, under any circumstances, be enchanted, put under geas or other form of spell, subjected to thaumatic energies beyond what is required to fulfill the specified conditions and requirements of entry into Equestria, and shall not, for any reason, be changed, altered, redefined, remade, transformed, transmogrified, ponified, mutated, ensorcelled, bewitched, enchanted, disenchanted, subjected to voodoo, curse or spell of any kind, under any circumstances, for any reason, except as defined in Appendix B, and in Section Six."

Stefan Bettencourt, and several other men had begun talking over the princess just after the middle of her long recitation. She did not acknowledge them in the least, but just continued as if they had been properly behaved. Then Celestia waited, silent, until the humans finally fell quiet as well.

"They're children, just children!" Ophelia Sachs stepped forward, weary of the way that the men were handling things. "My Oliver is a good child, a loving child. He is gentle and kind - and he's only a little boy. You'd like him, princess, I'm sure you would. He's very like a pony, actually, I guess that's why he wanted so much to be one. Please... please just... just this once, forget the contract, forget the Covenant, and... show my little boy just a little love, just a little compassion... he... he wasn't involved in any of those rules, he's just an innocent little..."

Ophelia stood there, crying, not even trying to hide her tears. She could only think about how much time she had wasted on trying to matter to the Good Families, instead of trying to matter to her son.

"I know dear Oliver very well, Mrs. Sachs." Celestia's hard look had evaporated, now only kindness shone from her eyes. "I spent six earthly months with each and every child of the Good Families, just as I did with you. I did not show them the things I showed you, as adults. I cherished and adored each and every one of your children, and I care very deeply for little Oliver."

Ophelia Sachs wiped her eyes and nose on her sleeve, she was beyond caring what anyone thought. "Then... save him. Save them all, please!"

"I cannot." Never had any one of the humans seen Celestia look so sad.

"That doesn't make sense!" Luigi Draghi, the father of Isla, shook a fist at the princess. "You remade us! You said you could bring Rensselaer back, only he would just die again because he was old. These kids aren't old! You have the power!"

"I have the power, but not the permission. Need I quote every pertinent part of the Covenant to you? You yourself have tied my hooves. To remake them, to bring dear Seraphina back to life, would require not merely magic, but change. I would need to violate the natural order of human existence - carefully spelled out by you - to save them. Only the fact that the Royal Corps of Unicorns acted without consulting me has preserved them thus far. By the terms of the Covenant, the Royal Corps should only have transported their bodies, and even that not by teleportation." Celestia shook her head ever so slightly. "Comet Tail will be hearing a great deal about this matter, I assure you."

"I invoke Section Six of the Covenant!" To the shock of every human, it was Sergey Brendalthorpe Brin. "Remedial transformation into Equestrian form!"

"Sergey?" Stefan could barely believe his ears. No one was more opposed to ponification than Brin. Even his own wife, Liliane, would be hard pressed to match Sergey's loathing of all things Equestrian.

Sergey's face was emotionless. "He's my son."

"He won't be." Stefan had fought so hard to get all of Brin's points into the Covenant. All of the most hard-ass points in the document were at Brin's demand.

"Fuck you, Bettencourt." Brin turned back to the princess. "That was your big out. They come of age, they get to choose for themselves. Alright. They all wanted to be ponies so bad that they ran away and... and this happened. Fine. You win. Violate human nature. Let my boy live as a stallion. Section Six. I give my consent."

The humans had been wrong. Celestia could look even sadder. "Your consent is not an issue. Section Six clearly defines that after the age of maturity, any human may petition for remedial ponification. Asher Brin has not reached the specified age of maturity."

The age was eighteen. Asher was only twelve. Sergey Brin grew red in the face. "YOU'RE JUST GOING TO LET HIM DIE? IS THAT IT? That's it, isn't it, you stinking pony bitch, you monster - this is all revenge for the Covenant, isn't it? You could do something, but you won't, to teach us a lesson! You'll follow every little word of that damn thing, sitting smug in the knowledge that we fucked ourselves, that's it, isn't it? That's what this is all about, that's..."

Brin was on his knees now, driving his fist into the marble floor, punching the unyielding stone in helpless rage and horror.

"That is not true, Mister Brin. I follow the Covenant because it is our contract. It is a promise, and I always keep my promises no matter what. Breaking promises only leads to chaos and discord, and above all things I...."

Luna, princess of the night, suddenly and unexpectedly interrupted her sister. The nocturnal diarch did not look happy. "We would speak now with thee, sister, forthwith and in privacy."

"Thou art impassioned by wrath against the wretches, and thus are blind unto compassion! Blowed be thy overly worshipped compact! In kindness and love dost thou belong, not in petty retributions for the slights of children! Thou dost shame me, dear sister, to be sibling to one who would weigh the letter of the law above its needful and desirable spirit!" The princess of the moon stomped about the antichamber as she spoke, her ethereal tail swirling like an angry mist behind her.

"Watch your tongue, sister! You do me injury with your words, which are both harsh, and untrue!" Celestia calmed herself. "Luna, dearest Luna, what I do is not from any rancor. I uphold only the law which they themselves demanded of me. I came to save them and they held their own species for ransom to benefit themselves alone. They forced the Covenant on me, and..."

"Thou speaketh as if wounded, but if this Covenant binds and chafes thee so, and if thou claimest it a bane to thee, let it not be a censor to us both! Do you but give it unto my care to address this matter in your stead, and we promise that in the end all means will be found justified, and all thorns that prick thee shall be transformed into blossoms that measure beauty into thy garden." Luna stared intently into the eyes of her sister. "Sweetest aspect of the sun, thou claimest thyself bound by promise and writ, but thou art not alone in promises. We also have oaths to keep, which we hath made to the very foals that sit now in tragic stone, or bask in chirurgical attention. Wouldst thou restrain us, thine owne sister, from our heartfelt promises in sacrifice to thy begrudged ones?"

Celestia's eyes flashed with anger. "You forget our beginnings! Discord, in name and deed reigned over us, and only through order was this world forged from senseless chaos..."

"Celestia!" Luna stood muzzle to muzzle with her sister. "Discord endureth as stone for clocks greater than our penance as aspect of the moon. Now thy former nemesis is repentant subject, just as we, thy closest kin. Thou dost cling to horrors ages gone, as a terrified foal to a mothering blanket, knowing only the past but insensate to thine own present. No Discord threatens thee now, and justice must be tempered with compassion, lest justice lose all meaning and become unyielding discord itself.

"We accuse thee no longer of spite, but instead implore thee to let thy ancient sorrows pass as a cloud upon the winds of time. That age is not our age, and in this place and in this era innocent and guileless foals stand to be judged as much as those who would make callous demands of thee. Grant them that most precious of gifts, life itself, and grant unto them their dying pleas to be fully your subjects, for both are one and the same.

"These foolish innocents have dared nightmare horrors solely to claim our offer to be our little ponies. They have forsaken sire and kin, and all their kind, to seek thee out and plead for succor. Wouldst thee deny them in order to maintain thine own appearance of perfection? Of what value is a cold legacy of unbroken pledges against even a single errant kindness?

"Celestia, sister, we knowest that thy salve against Discord was adherence to Law. Order hath always been thy balm. But compassion hast e're been thy creed before thou didst take up the shield of Order and the spear of Law. Let compassion hold sway with thee once more, despite contract or pledge or given word. Love should be thy legacy, not writs and tortes and dusty, mouldering documents."

"Mayhaps... perhaps..." Celestia began pacing, her mind busy with thought. "Both law and kindness can be served." She whirled and faced her sister. "I have learned much from these humans. They are clever and devious both, but they are not to be underestimated. The way they think... they always find the hidden path, the unseen way. They are indomitable, which is why I have rightfully feared and constrained them." The look on Luna's face was far too familiar. "Do not lecture me again on the griffons and diamond dogs. Have I not finally displayed wisdom with the rescue of the humans?"

Luna decided to hold her tongue.

"Sister, shining star of the night, I think there is a way to follow the Covenant to the letter and still grant these children their proper lives as our ponies! Come!" With that, Celestia turned and departed.

Petra trembled before the two princesses. She clung to Plantain, her fingers entwined in the pony's long, yellow mane. The tug of her hand reminded Plantain of her beloved Crème, and a tear came to her eye at the memory.

"Plantain?" Petra waited, unsure what the answer would be.

Plantain Acres wrapped her forelegs around the girl. "Of course I'll be there when you wake up! We're friends, aren't we?"

Petra hugged the pony back. "Yes! Oh, yes! The very best of friends. Thank you Plantain. Please... let's be friends forever!"

Petra disentangled herself from Plantain and moved to the center of the room. She stood, arms at her side, a smile on her face. "I am ready, your majesties. And..." She smiled in gratitude, a true Petra smile, directed first at Luna and then Celestia in turn. "...thank you, my princesses."

"You are welcome, my little..." Celestia's horn glowed with golden dweomer "...future pony."

Petra smiled even more brightly.

"He... Oliver... doesn't look so bad off. He doesn't look hurt." Ophelia alternated between tears and calmness.

The petrified statue stood on a massive pedestal, crafted by Luna to support the boy. Oliver stood upright, arms raised high, holding the body of Isla above him. Somehow, in the last instant, the overweight yet delicate child had managed to summon the strength to lift the little girl over his head. Their pose almost resembled part of a ballet routine, except for the looks of wide-eyed fear and determination on their faces. Isla gazed with blind stone eyes down upon her would-be savior, both horrified and grateful at Oliver's self sacrifice.

Ophelia Sachs began to raise a hand to touch her child, and then pulled her arm back. She couldn't face what she knew would be cold granite, hard and dead and insensate.

There beside Oliver and Isla were the other statues, here in their own private chamber of the castle.

Seraphina was there, flat, on her belly, and Asher beside her, on his back, both cast in stone. Milo still appeared to be trying to drag his useless legs behind him, crawling in desperation from ice that had long since melted.

In the center of the room, on a pedestal just like the others, stood Petra Alice Bettencourt, still smiling the biggest genuine smile of her life at the princesses, her princesses. Her stone face was hard and cold and still very human, but even made of granite it glowed with the knowledge that when enough time had passed, and she was eighteen by the contractually specified calendrical years, she, and all of the others, would be lawfully allowed revivification and remedial ponification.

"She beat us. That pony bitch beat us." Andrew Cameron studied the face of the statue that was his crawling son.

"No, you fool." Ophelia had lost any wish to be part of the elite. She had already approached the princesses. She would have a proper, pony home ready for her Oliver, when the time came - and a proper, pony mother to greet him. "You beat yourselves. You tried to take advantage of an honest gift of love, and until you learn why that was wrong, you will keep shaking your heads and cursing your saviors."

Cameron started to reply, but shouting at the deluded woman would serve nothing. She was just another peasant now, as far as he was concerned. Another member of the common rabble. She'd be a pony by tomorrow. A pitiful barnyard mare. "You never deserved to be part of the Good Families, Sachs."

Ophelia finally managed to place her hand on the arm of her Oliver. It was hard and cold as she had imagined, but it wasn't so bad. It was just suspended animation. The pony version of stasis. Oliver would live again, as a pony, and if what princess Celestia had confided to her was true, as a filly and not a colt. It didn't matter. For the first time in her life, Ophelia Sachs finally understood what truly mattered to her, and it wasn't power or influence. Her child mattered, her life mattered, and love mattered.

"Thank you, Andrew. That is the single nicest thing you have ever said to me." And with that, Hyssop Garden - Ophelia had already picked out a pony name for herself - turned and left the lithified children so that she could prepare for the morning. Tomorrow, she was going to be remedially ponified, as specified in Section Six, as was her right under the strict wording of the Covenant.