//------------------------------//
// "Stage Magician Exposed as Just a Regular Unicorn" 
// Story: The Ponion 
// by CartsBeforeHorses 
//------------------------------//

July 10, 2013
Fans Outraged as Stage Magician Exposed as Just a Regular Unicorn

LAS PEGASUS—Fans of the famous stage magician, The Great Zambini, were shocked today to find out that he was nothing more than a unicorn using unicorn magic rather than a stage magician using elaborate technical expertise and slight-of-hoof.

After his stage show last Saturday night, The Great Zambini took a bow, but he bowed too deeply and his top hat fell off of his head to reveal a unicorn horn underneath, which was greeted by boos and hisses from his audience.


The Great Zambini, horn accidentaly revealed to his audience

“I just can’t believe it,” said Lightning Dust, a pegasus mare from Cloudsdale visiting Las Pegasus for a weekend of entertainment, binge drinking, and problem gambling, “It just ruined everything. I thought that when he walked into that phone booth and disappeared, there was actually a secret trapdoor he was escaping through. I never conceived that he was a unicorn using his magic to just teleport out.”

“It makes me sick. I want my money back,” she added. 

“When he guessed that one mare’s name from the audience, that her favorite color was orange, and that she had two baby colts, I thought he was using a plant in the audience, or cold reading. But now I find out that he was probably just using mind reading magic to find that out. It just spoils the show for me, honestly,” said one stallion, All On Black, a unicorn visiting Las Pegasus from Canterlot.

“We expect tricks when we come here, not actual magic. If I wanted to see actual magic, I’d just walk down the street in Canterlot,” All On Black added.

“Yes, it’s all true,” said The Great Zambini when we caught him getting into his limousine later that night, “When I float a few feet above the stage during my grand finale, it isn’t some elaborate system of wires, or magnets, or anything like that. I’m actually just levitating myself. That’s all it is, and I’m sorry for the deception. Or rather, for using real magic instead of deception.”

The Great Zambini’s lovely assistant, Scantily Clad, couldn’t be reached for comment, so we do not yet know if she, too, was in on it the whole time.

Many of Zambini’s former fans told our reporters that this was the greatest disappointment since strongpony performer Gorlock, the World’s Strongest Pegasus, was revealed to simply be an earth pony with cardboard wings taped to his back. Ω