//------------------------------// // A Wild Ride // Story: The Legend of Dash Ketchum // by Bradel //------------------------------// Dash Ketchum slunk through the tall, wavy grass of the fields outside of Ponyville with her new pokomen Spikachu at her side. Her eyes were limpid burgundy orbs of feirce passion and hot-bloodedness, because she was going to be the best wonderbolt trainer that there ever was, and to catch them all was her true cause. And there, inf ront of her was a new pokeman she could catch. It was a pingey! The rainbow-haired pegasus trainer launched a pokeman-catching ball at the little creature, and for a moment, part of her heart regretted her actions because all creatures should be free, especially the cute ones like birds, but she hardened her heart against that sort of thinking and threw anyway, and the ball sallied through the air and hit... A SPEAROW! “Aww, fuck! What are you, a fool!?” asked Spikachu. “I thought you could throw better than that, you pansy-ass dickbacg.” “Hush, Spikachu! I don’t think the pidgey saw us, so maybe we can try again,” ejaculated the blue-winged pokemon master. But the spearow had other ideas! It sqwacked a mighty squack and jumped into the sky, spotting Dash Ketchum in a heart beat. It quacked again, and this time Spikachu got scared. “Oh shit. Shit shit shit. You fucking moron, Rainbow. It has friends, and it’s a damn sight higher level than you, you stupid pegasus.” Because Spikachu could speak the language of the pokemans, and he understood what Spearow had sqwacked. “Now it’s going to fuicking kill us!!” He said. “Ohmigosh, run! cried the purple-eyes mare, and she suited her words to action, leaping into the air and running for the cover of a nearby corpse of trees. Spikacho ran behind her, his little legs pumping like the pistons of some great and terrible machine. But they were too slow! The Spearow overtook them and pecked at Dash Katchum’s ear as it flew past them. Then another spearow overran them and pecked at the hornless pegasus’s flank, where her cutie mark showed a rainbow lightling bolt for her awesomeness – in exactly the same shape as the Canterlot Gym Badge she’d coveted ever since she was a filly and she first learned the ways of the pokemon masters. The gym was the best and strongest of all the gyms, and it was ruled over by the terrible Applebrock, a fierce and fiery tyrant whose pokemans were the best in all Equestria, or that was what Dash Ketchum’s mom, Mrs. Ketchum always said. “Why the hell did you have to fuck witht he spearow tribe, Dash! Damn!” Spikachu was bruised all over now, and the trees were still a long ways away. Dash pulled up and waited for a moment, and Spikachu caught up with her, and she threw the yellow dragon lizard on her back with a whump. Lilac bolts of power coruscated over his soft flesh, and he writed in pain, but now the rainbow-tailed trainer could go faster, and she did. Still, the spearows kept attacking them like giant birds pecking as they flew by. But up ahead, a mysterious figure galloped out of the woods and threw a bomb at the spearows, and they got scared and flew away. “Hey there, Dash Ketchum! It looks like you need some help!” The new arrival laughed deeply. “Misty Pie! What are you doing hear!?” Dash Ketchum pulled to a stop, staring at her old friend with worried orbs of lavender lucidity.