//------------------------------// // My Little Short: Coherent Time Lines are for Wimps 1 // Story: My Tiny Pony: Friendship In Miniature // by The Well Dressed Ninja //------------------------------// Today is a slow day. No, scratch that. Today has been an absolute clusterfuck. Lightning storm rolled in last night and has decided to make an ass of itself by hanging around. It then proceeded to troll me by sending a ludicrous lance of lightning into the nearby transformer. So now I can't watch tv, play video games, surf the web, eat ice cream, or take a hot shower. Friggin sucks. At least the ponies are able to entertain themselves easily. I swear I saw one of them chasing their own tail. Kind of hard to in the dark though. Well at least I have my tunes. Come to me sweet rhapsody, cast out boredom and fill my soul with soothing light. LET THE MUSIC PIERCE THE HEAVENS! *pat* "Eh?" Looking down I see a pony hitting my shoes. Looks like they want something. Turning my IPod's light I see blue mane and white coat with a horn and sunglasses. Vinyl Scratch then. What does she want? "What do you want?" Vinyl gives an annoyed huff and thumps her hoof on the ground 4 times. Ah, so she wants to be picked up then. Leaning down I feel sort of like the Iron Giant. Minus the dying in a nuclear explosion while in the throes of a delusion that I was from Krypton. Setting the DJ on the coffee table I go back to couching on the couch with me beats when I hear another thump. Looking back at the blue haired possible vampire pony I see her giving me a frown. "What the hell's your problem now?" While she might not understand everything I'm saying (and vice-versa) she seems to catch drift of my annoyed tone. Rolling her eyes (no I couldn't see it, but you know she did) she makes some squeaking noises while pointing at my IPod. Well, as much as a thing with no fingers can point... "What, this? It's an IPod." Shaking her head she continues to point at the IPod, then the my giant head phones. She then points to herself and her head phones. "Ok charades round 56- no 65- fuck it. So... hmmm... My IPod plus my headphones plus you and your headphones equals... You want to listen to my sound?" Well that sucked. Plus impossible. No way she had a big enough adapter to plug in. And I wasn't about to give up my music player. "Sorry toots, your plug is too small for my hole." ... that came out wrong. Seeing my shaking head, she makes a protesting squeak and motions for me to bring the head phones closer. I was bored and curious enough to do it. It's not like she took off her sunglasses and gave me puppy dog eyes. Nope, totally didn't happen. Damn ponies oversized ocular orbs! So I bring my earphones in closer and wait for further instructions. She then points to both sides and points to either side of her... Ooooooooh I get it. Like an surround sound system. After setting it up she finally gives a commanding squeak. I will assume it meant something along the "DROP THE BASS!" Starting to warm up to the idea, I decide to give her something that would blow her mind. "Ok, IPod plugged in? Check. Headphones in optimal position? Check. Volume on max? Check. Alright pony LETS DO THIS! Well that was a good book. Oh Herman Melville, you always know how to entertain my more sophisticated side. Wait, I'm forgetting something... Oh right Vinyl. I wonder how she liked th- Oh. Oh dear. Hey, brain, ponies are supposed to lay on their side and spasmodically twitch when their having a good time right? NO YOU DUMB FUCK! SHE NEEDS A PONY DOCTOR STAT! Ah, yes thank you for clearing that up. Now to respond in a calm and level-headed manner. "TWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!"