The Trotzamore Stratagem

by The Rarispy


On Melancholy Hill

“Alright, class! Don’t forget, tomorrow is our big arts and crafts day! See you all tomorrow!”
 
There’s no way I can figure all of this out on my own… I definitely need to talk to somepony. Miss Cheerilee doesn’t have a special somepony of her own, but she always gives good advice about everything, even stuff I wouldn’t expect her to know about.
 
It’s worth a shot.
 
“Excuse me, Miss Cheerilee?”
 
“Hm? Yes, Sweetie Belle?”
 
“If you’re not busy, can I… ask you something? I think I need some advice.”
 
“Of course. What’s the problem?”
 
“Well, you see… um, how do I put this? What do you do when your special somepony doesn’t love you as much as he used to?”
 
“I, uh—come again?”
 
“Like, say you have a special somepony that you really love and care about and you want to be with for the rest of your life, but you feel like they’re starting to love you less and less, and you don’t know why. What do you do to make them love you more again?”
 
“…Is this something that your sister put you up to?”
 
“Huh? No. Why?”
 
“Well, it’s just—I wasn’t expecting you to ask a question like that.”
 
“Why not? Is there something wrong with me wanting to ask that?”
 
“Um… no, not at all.”
 
Does she think I’m too young to have a special somepony? Is that it? I hope not. Because that would kind of mean that Rarity was right.
 
“I-I don’t know. I guess you could… give them gifts constantly and take them to a really nice place so they would see how much you really mean to them, but… Sweetie Belle, who is this advice for, anyway?”
 
“Um… just—somepony. Somepony else that’s not me. But, uh—that sounds like some great tips and I’ll be sure to tell them to… the pony that wanted to know this. So, um… bye, Miss Cheerilee! See you tomorrow!”
 
“Bye… Sweetie Belle. Hmm. How odd.”
 
Well, that wasn’t much of a help. I gave him the best gift I could possibly give him already, and that still wasn’t enough. What else could I do? I mean… I can’t think of anything else to give him.
 
Take them to a really nice place? Like what? Rarity helped me get into the only fancy restaurant in Ponyville that accepts fillies!
 
Maybe I should do… what was it Zecora told me to do again? Go up to a hill and stare at a sunset?
 


I just don’t get it. Why is Sweetie Belle acting like this? What did I do wrong? I told her it was a really great gift, so why did she get scared and run away?
 
She said I don’t… love her as much? What did she mean by that? I just don’t… I don’t understand.
 
Maybe she’s mad at me about something. Or maybe… maybe she’s the one who doesn’t love me!
 

 
No, no! What am I saying? Of course she still loves me. But, why is she avoiding me now? This just… this doesn’t make sense.
 
“Aw horse apples! Still not gettin’ a bite!”
 
“It’s all in the technique, Apple Bloom! Watch me!”
 
“Huh?”
 
That’s Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. I wonder why Sweetie Belle isn’t with them…
 
Maybe they know where she went.
 
“Aaaannnd… Drat.”
 
“Hey, guys.”
 
“Oh, howdy, Spike!”
 
“Hey, Spike.”
 
“What are you… doing?”
 
“Fly fishing!”
 
“It’s a cool way to fish! We might even have a cutie mark in it! Do you wanna try it with us?”
 
“Um… no thanks. Maybe another time.” That looks more like a weird way to fish… “I was just wondering if you two knew where Sweetie Belle is.”
 
“She… isn’t with you?”
 
“Uh—no.”
 
Is she supposed to be?
 
“We haven’t seen her since class ended just a couple hours ago.”
 
“Yeah! And yesterday, she decided she wanted to take some time off crusading to think about things.”
 
“Wouldn’t tell us what about, though.”
 
“…Oh. Well… thanks, anyway. See ya.”
 
“Bye!”
 
“Later, Spike! Now… back to angling! I bet I’m gonna get a big BASS this time around!”
 


“I wonder where I can find a big hill…”
 
“Huh? Oh! Hey, Sweetie Belle!”
 
“What—OH, NO!”
 
“Sweetie, it’s me! Spike!”
 
“NO! GO AWAY!”
 
“W-What?”
 
“I-I need to be alone! I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ELSE! DON’T FOLLOW ME!”
 
“I—What?”
 
“I’m sorry, okay? SORRY!”
 
“Okay…”
 


That was a close one!
 
I just can’t risk seeing Spike right now. Not until I figure out how I can fix our relationship!
 


Seriously, why is she avoiding me so much? WHAT DID I DO WRONG!?
 
“Maybe she… maybe she really doesn’t love me anymore. No, that can’t be it!”
 
…Can it? Maybe that’s why she’s voiding me. Because she doesn’t care about me anymore, but she doesn’t want to tell me about it and hurt my feelings!
 
That’s it! That must be! Why else would she not want to talk to me anywhere?
 
Well, if that’s… if that’s the way it’s going to be, then I guess I’m not going to care either.
 
I don’t need Sweetie Belle, anyways…
 
“I don’t need anyone.”
 


So, this is it… The sunset that Zecora told me to look at…
 
I don’t get what the big deal is. I mean, it’s pretty and all. Miss Cheerilee says that Princess Celestia is the one who raises and lowers the sun every day. She must work really hard to do that every single day, and still have the time to make such a pretty sunset.
 
But… I don’t think I’m getting any answers here.
 
“Oh, what am I going to do? I can’t even bear to look at Spike until I can solve this problem. But what am I supposed to do? How can I make him love me again, like we used to? I… I don’t want to lose him. Please, somepony, anypony, just help me out…”
 
“Ahoy, up there!”
 
“Huh?”
 
“Ahoy there, Sweetie Belle! What are you doing all the way up there?”
 
“Oh! Hi, Pipsqueak! I’m just… looking at the sunset.”
 
“Really? Mind if I join you?”
 
“I guess… not.”
 
“Great.”
 
I wonder why Pipsqueak’s out here… And why does he want to see the sunset too?
 
“It sure is a beaut tonight, that sunset!”
 
“Yeah.”
 
“Sometimes, I like to watch it from out my bedroom window. They always look so pretty.”
 
“Mm-hm.”
 
“Do you like to watch the sunsets every day too, Sweetie Belle?”
 
“Not every day, no. I just wanted to look at it today, because…”
 
“Cause?”
 
Pipsqueak probably wouldn’t know this either… Then again, a lot of the other fillies in the class seem to have a crush on him. Maybe it’s just because of his accent, though.
 
Doesn’t hurt to try?
 
“Hey Pipsqueak, can I ask you a question?”
 
“Yes?”
 
“Have you ever been in love?”
 
“Well… sort of. It’s a bit complicated, actually.”
 
“What do you do to let somepony know how much you love them, if it seems like they don’t love you back?”
 
“Well… my mum used to tell me things about love. She said that if you’ve loved somepony for a long time and they don’t love you back, the best thing to do would be to talk to them.”
 
“Talk to them?”
 
“Yeah. She said that if you really love somepony, you have to be honest with them. And that if they can’t be honest back, then they don’t really love you and you shouldn’t try to win them over in the first place.”
 
“Wow.”
 
“She also mentioned something about snogging, but I didn’t pay attention to that part. Snogging’s kind of icky…”
 
Just… talk to him. Maybe that’s it. Maybe all I need to do is talk to him and figure out why it seems like he doesn’t love me as much. Then we can solve the problem together!
 
THAT’S IT!
 
“Pipsqueak, you’re a genius!”
 
“Me, a genius? Well, gee… you really mean it?”
 
“Yes! I think I know what to do now thanks to you!”
 
“Aw, thank you kindly. …Um, if you don’t mind, could you please stop hugging me now?”
 
“Oh, sorry. “
 
“It’s alright. I quite liked it, actually.”
 
“Shoot, it’s getting late. I should get back to Miss Harvest’s house before she starts wondering where I am! Bye, Pipsqueak! Thanks for the great idea!”
 
“Oh! You’re welcome, Sweetie Belle! …My fair lady.
 
Now I know what I’m going to do! Maybe I can still save us!
 
…I hope I can.
 

 
Wait a minute, what is ‘snogging’ anyway?
 


“Well, that was nothing short of… what’s the word I’m looking for? Oh, yeah… PATHETIC!
 
“We’re sorry, master…” one of the sirens replied in a creaky voice.
 
“Yes… they were too powerful for us…”
 
The once-powerful sirens had regressed into tiny, meek seahorse-like creatures with the head of a pony, and were now flopping about on the lake bed.
 
“This is ridiculous!” Discord yelled. “I called upon you, helped to lure them right onto your turf, and even boosted your abilities of premonition and mental projection tenfold, and you still couldn’t make them ripe for harvest? No wonder your species has been nearly extinct for the past three and a half generations!”
 
“Please, boss… Just give us one more chaaAAAAggghhhh…”
 
Her pleas were cut off as a figure emerged from the shadows and stepped on the poor specimen. Instantly, the sea pony was drained of its life force, killing it instantly.
 
“Well now, look what the cockatrice dragged in.”
 
“So… we meet again, my pretty,” Discord smirked, raising his eyebrows. “Haven’t seen much of you in the past thousand years. So, how’s Junior doing?”
 
“WHAT.”
 
“Oh, no, wait… that was with your mother, wasn’t it? I’m sorry, you all look the same to me.” He shook his head and regained his composure. “Anyway, that’s all old hat. How have you been, my dear?”
 
“You already know of my suffering.”
 
“Do I?” Discord scoffed. “Last I heard, you were getting married. How’d that go?”
 
“I see you have failed in your quest, as well,” the figure mused, changing the subject. “All these schemes, all these allies. You even teamed up with these wretched wannabes.” It kicked the dead sea pony back into the lake, as the other still-surviving ones jumped in as well. “And now they’re all closing in on those last three gemstones. How much longer do you hope to keep the Gate closed?”
 
“H-how do you know about all this?” Discord asked sternly, as his whole demeanor shifted.
 
“I have my sources. I… also have my resources.”
 
“Ahh, I see,” he responded. “Let me guess, in return for helping me out, you’re going to want total control of Equestria, am I right?”
 
“Nothing so grand… at least, not yet,” the figure replied, chuckling. “All I want right now is revenge on those who have wronged us!”
 
“Ahhh, I see! How convenient. Perhaps this could work in both of our favors after all,” he realized, stroking his goatee.
 
“Meaning…?”
 
Discord smirked. “I have two ponies in particular that I’m extremely dedicated towards, the only two that are close to becoming a threat towards my plans! And I’m sure you’ll find one of them in particular to be quite familiar…”
 
“Go on.”
 
“I’m not going to dawdle on this for too long, but long story short, I only have a limited amount of my magic available to me right now, so I’m not powerful enough to take care of them on my own. And doing so would ensure you and your kind quite a life force to pass around.” Discord turned to the last of the sea ponies, which hopped in out of fear. “Perhaps I was just looking at the wrong feeders…”
 
Just then, Discord winced. He pulled his right antler close to his ear and leaned in intently.
 
Discord, come here immediately. We have a problem. A BIG one.
 
“Well…?” the figure prodded.
 
“Alright, it seems I have a prior engagement I need to be tending to, so let’s just make this snappy. Now here’s what I was thinking…”
 
He leaned in close and whispered some stuff into the figure’s ear. The figure giggled intently, and at last stepped out of the shadows as a huge grin spread across her fanged muzzle.
 
“Sounds very interesting indeed…”
 
“So what do you say?” Discord held out his paw. “Do we have a deal, queenie?”