Nomad's Requiem

by Shadowflash

Chapter 6 - Investigation

I woke up to the smell of something delectable. The scent of steamy-hot baked eggs and something similar to some sizzling bacon. I wasn’t one for too much eating heck, I could live off of a stalk of grain for eight years before I needed more but I thought I’d sit up and regain some energy.

As I sat up, I saw a large tray where my assumptions were correct two baked eggs sat neatly cut on a ceramic white plate and two pieces of... Wait...

“What the hell is this?” I grabbed the weird brown and stringy-like “bacon” and waved it in front of me.

“It looks like someone weaved this from hay, mixed it in a small child’s greasy hair, and then cooked it in a pan of lard!” I slammed it onto the plate and watched as it broke into three pieces.

“Whatever. Eggs are good enough, I’ll just throw out that... hay crap,” I grabbed the egg halves, lifted my scarf and shoved them in my mouth. What? Do you eat with etiquette while alone? Didn’t think so.

I stood up and took the hay-like bacon imposters, looking for a nearby trashcan. Found one sitting next to the motel room’s door. Tossed those damn things out, for sure. And here I thought horses were omnivores. Anyways, enough screwing around.

I grabbed that list I wrote last night, along with my staff, and bolted out of the door. It was time to do some investigation of this place so I could learn some new things. Like where pony babies come from and how these ponies built houses with hooves. Okay, neither of those things, but it’s the thought that counts.

As I exited the room, however, I was greeted by the sight of billions upon billions of ponies running through the town. Fine, they weren’t running, they were walking... And there weren’t billions, just... a bunch.

Curious as to what was up with everyone running rampant, I stopped a nearby red stallion, who was reading a newspaper.

“Hey, bud, what’s going on here?” I asked simply.

“Ponies gettin’ ready for the princess to arrive,” he answered in a southern accent. Damn. Here I thought I could avoid more morons. Last thing I need is someone who has the IQ of a four year old.

“Princess? Why’s that a big deal? Don’t ponies see them everyday?” I questioned while looking at ponies stampeding to put up banners or some crap.

“Yer new here, ain’tya? It’s a big deal, cuz a local bookworm named Twilight Sparkle was just crowned princess. So, we be celebrating. Ya got it now, bud?” he responded with a somewhat agitated tone.

“Whoa, calm down,” Sheesh, and I thought I was bad. Also, Pinkie never mentioned Twilight was a princess. Damn broads. “So, this Twilight Sparkle is a new princess. When will she arrive?”

“‘Bout sunset. Maybe, seven hours,” he answered. “Why?”

“Well, I’m not suppose to be here, so it’d be great if I could speak to her and get my situation sorted out,” I explained.

“Ah. I see. Well, she’ll be around later today, so why don’t ya’ll spend some time gettin’ your attire fixed up at the Carousel Boutique?” his thick red hoof was pointing at my leather armour. “Looks a bit broken to me.”

I looked down to see large gashes slowly tearing open and revealing a bit of my pale white skin. Dear gods, I better fix this.

“Perfect. Just when I needed to deal with other things...” I sighed. “Where is this boutique?”

“Right over there,” his hoof pointed past me. I looked to my left to see a large, purple and white carousel-looking building whoa, didn’t see that one coming! and a sign hanging from it that read “Carousel Boutique”.

“Well, I’ll be heading over there then.” Troglodyte.

I walked off without me saying another word to him and my direction aimed for the giant purple and white building. At least it didn’t burn my eyes with awful colours. Whoever made it, I’ll have to commend them for colouring it well.

Now that I have to wait about seven hours, I gotta find stuff to do. I groaned quietly to myself. I guess after I visit this boutique, I could ask to find some other places to check out and occupy myself. Might as well get some sort of knowledge out of being here.

It took me, I don’t know, fifty steps before I actually reached it? When I got to the damn place, I ducked to fit through the door. Stupid doors and being small and whatnot.

When I walked through, I was hit by an array of bright pinks, purples and whites. I nearly blinded myself just by walking into this building! I am taking back my compliment from earlier. Dear gods! I was so stunned by the colours I barely heard the bell ring as I entered.

“Just a second!” I heard a female voice yell. Perfect. Another mare! Wait, I shouldn’t be surprised, the sign said the ratio was about four to one.

I decided to look around this ‘boutique’. Equine shaped mannequins were all wearing assortments of clothing that either looked to stylish or too formal for my tastes. Assuming the owner of this place is an actual clothes designer, I’ll give her credit for her quirky style.

Anyways, the rest of the place was... Normal. For a boutique, I guess. A stage with a giant mirror for ponies to look at themselves, some change rooms off to my right, and a bunch of waiting couches to the left of the door, which I myself was now sitting on.

I should mention why I hate bright colours. They burn my eyes. It’s as simple as that. The sun? I could stare at for hours. Godly beings? I could do that too. Bright colours? Hell no. Gielinor was perfect to live in with its dull landscape, but now I have to deal with this... Crap.

Off to the far left was a staircase. I could hear the mare stamping down them quickly and she made herself quite apparent with her purple, curly, mane and brilliantly white coat. Oh dear, I’ve made three compliments. I’m losing my edge. Oh, also, she was a unicorn. Who knew?

“Welcome to the Carou ” she stopped when she saw me. I sighed and assumed she was “scared” of me.

“Look, I’m not here to hurt you, stop being so scared,” Seriously, this is getting annoying.

“Scared...? Scared?” She yelled. Ow, my ears. What’s with everyone yelling so loud? “Your attire is hideous!”

“Oh...?” My attire is hideous? Her store is hideous with these colours!

“Yes! Just look at it! Brown, gray, and mixtures of purple? What kind of stylist made that atrocious looking disaster?” She was super close to me while looking over my armour. I couldn’t help but laugh at her enthusiasm.

“This is not a laughing matter, sir! Look, there is even holes in it, too! And that scarf! Oh, do not get me started on that scarf!” She was rolling her bright blue eyes and I just shook my head.

“Look, first of all, what’s your name? Secondly, I’m not here to get my armour redesigned, I’m here to get some leather to fix it. Lastly, I want to know more about you before I head off. I’m a bit new here,” I asked her simply. She seemed to calm down at this point.

“Oh, my, where are my manners? I am Rarity fashionista of Ponyville!” She held out a hoof to me, “and you are?”

“Nomad. Just Nomad,” I shook her hoof quickly. “So, my request?”

“Oh, yes, your request for leather. I should have some, although I have never had anypony ask me for it before. It weirds me out that Griffons use it,” Rarity said, having trotted off past me and to a door next to the change rooms.

She opened the door and quickly started rummaging through, yelling “aha!” and coming back with a large and square chunk of leather.

“Here we are!” Rarity was holding the piece of leather in a blue aura; the aura was coming from her horn and I assumed she was using basic telekinesis. interesting that they have access to some magic here...

“That will be sixteen bits!” She stated with a happy grin. I groaned, knowing I didn’t have this world’s currency.

“Uhg, nevermind then. I won’t bother with the leather if I can’t afford it,” I told her simply. She raised a brow at me.

“Well... I suppose I can just give it to you, it is not like I have use for leather that often. Most of my creations require silk, cotton, or spandex,” She said as she her magic placed the leather in my lap.

“Well, thanks, I guess,” Ew, thanking people for free stuff. Gross. “So, my final request?”

“Ah, yes. Well, I already told you my name is Rarity Belle and I am a fashionista. I was born and raised here in Ponyville, and found my cutie mark when I was about eight years of age,” she announced proudly. What the hell is a cutie mark?

“What in the gods’ names is a cutie mark?” I asked.

“You do not kno well, it is when a pony is becoming of age and it signifies their level of maturity. Some are abstract and others are very specific,” Rarity smiled and turn her body, showing me three blue gems on the side of her ass. Yes, it’s a flank. Shut up, I don’t care about analytics.

“Mine is three gems, as you can see, which shows my ability to find gems out of nowhere, my ability for a fine eye of perfection, and my ability to create beautiful pieces of clothing!” She had a huge grin on her face. I really wish I could slap that off. Too much happiness in this place.

“Hrm. Intriguing. Some of your designs are decent, but I’ve seen far better,” Cynical mode: engaged. “Along with the design of this building the outside is fine, but my eyes are burning because of the inside decor. If you had an eye for perfection, you’d change the colour palette of this place.”

Rarity just looked at me, dumbfounded by my knowledge of semi-decent decoration. Alright, so, I’ve built a few awesome houses in my day and I know what I’m talking about... Maybe some of us also enjoy reading through useless books.

“I... The designs of this building could be revised, yes I agree, and as for your comment about my dresses, I always think they are so dreaded. Ponies just buy them anyways, happy with whatever I make them! I try so hard to stick to the latest trends and they just don’t care!” She huffed, sitting on her rump and crossing her forehooves.

“Well, why the heck does a pony need to wear clothes, anyways? Your tails cover up your genetalia quite well,” I stated nonchalantly while receiving a laugh in reply. At least she isn’t embarrassed by the mention of genetalia.

“That’s true, but ponies buy clothing for formal occasions. Which happen quite frequently,” She corrected me and I only nodded, standing up with my piece of leather.

“Well, I’ll be off. I need to go towning to learn more about this place. Any place I should visit?” I asked her.

“Sugar Cu ”

“NO!” I yelled and then quickly stopped to clear my throat. “I mean, I’ve already been there.”

“With that response, I assume you have met Pinkie. She is a handful,” Rarity giggled at her comment. “Anyways, I would suggest Golden Oaks Library, but the owner is arriving for a celebration. So, perhaps try Sweet Apple Acres? It’s just outside of town. Large red barn on a hill. Can’t miss it.”

I nodded. “Awesome. At least I’ll have something to do,” I walked to the exit, opening the door and waved to her as I left.