//------------------------------//
// Chapter 7 
// Story: Dealt A Bad Hoof 
// by TheHooligan 
//------------------------------//



“Zzzzz”

“...Dragon?”

“Zzzzzzzz”

“Dragon!”

“Zzz”

“Hey, wake up! Trixie’s getting tired of listening to you snore all day!”

“...What?” Deep within the dark depths of subconsciousness a spark of higher functioning began to stir, it’s sleep disturbed by an annoyingly familiar voice. As Spike roused back to the land of the living the first sensation to assert itself was a painful throbbing that made him hiss out in pain, and to make matters worse something immediately began prodding his skull. With an aggravated grumble Spike half-heartedly swiped at the unseen tormentor, and finally cracked open his eyelids to see a most unexpected sight.

With a disinterested expression on her face The Great and Powerful Trixie looked down at the waking dragon, her hat blocking out the sun, and strands of her pale blue mane hanging close enough to tickle his nostrils. A stunned silence set over Spike as he found himself unable to find any words at all, and just as he nearly grasped a semi intelligent batch of words the unicorn’s horn glowed and something the size of his fist levitated toward his face.

“Eat this.” 

“Huh?”

“Last time Trixie checked you dragons eat rocks so here.” Focusing in on the light blue aura that floated before his eyes, Spike could make out what must have been the remaining survivors from the binghamite stash. Despite his stomach beginning to growl at the prospect of receiving a quick treat, the drake couldn’t help looking past the floating gems and setting a questioning look upon the mare. Trixie turned her head to look toward her carriage apparently unwilling to meet Spike’s gaze, meanwhile the blue aura disappeared allowing the binghamite to follow into a waiting outstretched hand. 

“Uhhh... thanks?” Immediately Spike popped the small snack into his mouth and crunched away though not loud enough to drown out Trixie’s reply.

“Save it, Trixie’s just making sure that you don’t go trying to eat her like you did earlier.” 

Trixie raised an eyebrow as the sound of Spike choking followed her sentence immediately, turning back to the mentioned dragon the mare nearly smirked at the sight of surprised expression facing her.

“I did what?!” He coughed. Guilt spread over the dragon as Spike wracked his brain trying to remember everything that had happened after he pulled the lake monster out of the water. Despite his efforts his mind only managed to conjure blurry images, and vague feelings of anger, greed, and hunger.

“After you surprisingly enough banished that gargantuan nuisance, you seemed to have your feeble mind set on making a meal out of Trixie.” Seeing Spike don such an apologetic look nearly made Trixie regret bringing up the subject. Mentally scolding herself Trixie turned away for feeling a wave of displeasure, she’d been feeling less than herself since the end of their monster problem.

“I am so sorry... I didn’t hurt you did I?” Though the headache had ebbed away, and the offered gems did a good job at banishing his belly’s grumbling, a small sinking feeling grew within him. Trixie might have been the bane of his existence since they met, but he’d hate himself if he learned that his greed form had harmed a single hair on the mare’s head.

“Of course not! Trixie outsmarted you the moment that she felt you appraising her with those huge green eyes.” Trixie briefly wondered if she could have worded her sentence better, but from the corner of her eye she noticed a flash of embarrassment spread over Spike’s face. An ill-meaning grin spread on the mare’s face as she decided to poke a little fun for her own amusement. “Though after you gorged yourself on more rocks you did try to spoon Trixie.”

“What?!” Scales tinted darker from a large blush, and ears morphed to an odd mixture of the colors green and red, Spike turned toward the lake in an attempt to hide his face. Frowning at his inability to remember the chaos his greed form might have exacted, the dragon’s back stiffened when something began to lean onto his left side.

“Not that Trixie blames you for the incident, The Great and Powerful Trixie is well aware that her great and powerful form is akin to a goddess in the eyes of all others.” A wicked smile was plastered onto Trixie’s face as she watched the purple, and green scales tinge red before her eyes. Who’d have thought that teasing the young dragon would rival how fun it was to insult him flat out? Deeply enjoying Spike’s obvious discomfort, Trixie came up with the perfect way to finish her tormenting.

Frozen in place thanks to Trixie’s unexpected close proximity, and the unexplainable flustered feeling that ran rampant through him, Spike willed himself to ignore every word that came out of the mare’s mouth. At least that was the plan before he picked up the disarming scent of jasmine, and a spine shivering purr entered his ears.

“You know... Spike, there’s been something Trixie has been wanting to tell you since you woke up.” 

“...!” Though he remained silent Spike’s mental voice turned from his own into that of Twilight’s as it listed every reasonable explanation for Trixie’s behavior. The unicorn must have been setting him up for another cheap shot at his less than prepared psyche, or she had developed something close to admiration toward him for saving her life. Dozens of long-winded scientific theories sped through Spike’s mind within the time span of a few seconds, only to end on the most unlikely one of all just as Trixie began to speak again. “Its not like she...”

“Well it’s just that... you...”

“...but what if she?” Suddenly Spike was quite interested in hearing the end of Trixie’s sentence, his ears perked up, and his green pupils darted to the left to see her.

“You still smell like monster vomit.”

The Twilight in his head didn’t hesitate to recite an “I told you so” as Spike covered both his ears to block out Trixie’s laughter. Shrugging the guffawing unicorn off of his shoulder did little to halt her sounds of mirth, and giving his arm a sniff Spike’s gut churned when he didn’t smell roses. With a defeated sigh Spike trudged toward the lake’s edges, faintly hoping that the extreme scrubbing he was about to give himself might attract something big enough to eat him, and his overwhelming embarrassment.

Trixie’s mocking laughter had continued on past Spike’s angered bath, was still going strong as Spike pulled the carriage back to the dirt road they had abandoned, and showed no sign of stopping a mile down the road. Eventually a boiling point was reached, with a growl Spike stopped dead in his tracks, and whirled around to face a still giggling Trixie.

“Don’t you have anything better to do than cackle at me all day?”

“Why? Are the dragon’s feelings still hurt from Trixie’s little joke?” Though she stopped laughing a large smirk still adorned the mare’s face as she looked Spike in the eye from her window, head propped up on her hoof in a relaxed manner.

Rolling his eyes Spike averted his gaze to hide a small blush that began to form, much to his irritation. “No! I just think it’d be a better use of your time to do something helpful, or at least somewhat productive instead of bugging me while I chauffeur you around for free.”

“And what pray tell, should the Great and Powerful Trixie do that would be be classified as productive?” 

Optimistic that perhaps he was finally making some good natured ground with the mare, Spike tapped a claw to his chin for a few seconds before replying. “Well... you could walk instead of just riding along, that would make pulling this thing a lot easier.” An outraged gasp immediately met the dragon’s ears as well as the feeling of something burning holes in the back of his head. “...Uh oh.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?!”

“Uhh, nevermind dumb idea.”

“...Indeed... Lazy drake.”

Not wanting to drop the ball completely, Spike tried thinking of something else for Trixie to do in the her free time. “You could tell me where we’re going, that’d would at least give me an idea on just how far away from Equestria we are.”

“Do you really think Trixie would be performing for drooling dogs in the boonies if she actually knew where she was?” From her position Trixie contemplated finding something to levitate and bounce off Spike’s head, his suggestions were getting more and more idiotic and she could use a good laugh.

“Maybe you should work on your act then.” Already running on empty regarding ways to keep the unicorn occupied so that he could get a little peace and quiet, Spike was starting to accept that it was a pointless endeavor and started to resume pulling the carriage, until an even more outraged noise stopped him in his tracks.

“Do you dare insinuate that the mind blowing spectacle that is Trixie’s gift to all lesser creatures could be flawed in some way?!”  No longer leisurely watching Spike from her window, Trixie had disappeared into her carriage one moment, only to loudly exit it once again from the main door. Spike couldn’t help but flinch a bit from the loud *bang* that announced the door being slammed shut, followed by the mage’s loud hoof stomps as she made her way toward him. Now glaring up at the dragon from right beside him, a quiet crackle emitted from Trixie as if her very magic itself had been offended.

“Trixie could have sworn that you said something profoundly more moronic than the usual blathering that escapes your lips, would you kindly repeat yourself, toad?” And with that gone was Spike’s concern for crossing a line, as well any chance of a civil conversation emerging between the two for the moment.

Puffing a few green embers from his nostrils out of annoyance, Spike’s head whipped around to begin another tense locking of the eyes with the equally angered female. “I said that your ego driven farce of a performance needs work, maybe if you spent half the time actually being entertaining or good at magic instead of just showboating what little skill you have, you wouldn’t be such a laughing stock back in Equestria!”

“Insolent newt!” Raising her head higher up so that she was butting heads with Spike who had lowered his own during his reply, Trixie growled loudly as she inwardly debated using her magic to attempt turning Spike into something small and squishable. “What makes you think that you have any clue about the mind blowing intricacy that involves The GREAT and POWERFUL TRIXIE’S act?!”

Returning the daggers that Trixie’s violet eyes shot into his own with just as much force, an idea popped into Spike’s head resulting in a toothy grin that spread across his face. “Well from listening and watching you I think it’s a pretty safe bet that it goes a little like this!”

Quicker than Trixie’s eyes could see the dragon’s tail whipped above his head, and lashed out at her. Caught completely off guard by the dragon’s sudden aggression Trixie didn’t even think to will up a protective barrier, but instead winced from the incoming blow. 

A few dozen seconds passed before Trixie realized that despite her failure to avoid the strike, or to block it that she felt relatively unharmed, daring to look back up the mare noticed that Spike had an even larger smirk upon his face than the one that had appeared before his lashing out. Taking a cautionary step back as well as getting ready to stain the path with the satisfied looking drake’s ashes Trixie couldn’t help but noticed that Spike appeared different. Dark violet eyes scanned over the dragon’s form before they narrowed, and focused on something that should not have been there. Through gritting teeth an almost inaudible command hissed from Trixie’s lips, as she glared at the dragon harder than she had ever done before.

“Give... it... back!”

Donning an expression of surprise Spike looked wildly around him as if not knowing what the mare was referring to, after a few moments Spike’s eyes peered up to settle on the all too familiar purple hat that now sat comfortably upon his head. “Oh! You mean this?!” 

“Trixie is not kidding with you dragon, return Trixie’s hat or you’ll find yourself enduring a level of pain unlike any that you’ve ever known,”

“Dragon?” Narrowing his eyes slightly Spike raised his snout into the air in mock outrage, crossing his arms like a pouting foal. “Surely you must be some uninformed yutz not to have heard of...” Standing on his back legs, raising his right hand above his head, while holding his left far in front of him Spike looked back towards a now surprised Trixie. Taking a large intake of air Spike exhaled through his nostrils producing twin geysers of emerald fire as he bellowed loudly in faux arrogance. “The Stupendous and Spectacular Spike!”

In a flash the growing inferno of anger that glowed behind Trixie’s eyes snuffed out as the little gerbil in her brain tripped over itself on it’s wheel, and proceeded to be spun around and around helplessly. She knew her eyes weren’t deceiving her, was confident that her ears worked perfectly fine, but her mind refused to believe the image, and sounds that now faced her. Another silent moment passed as the gerbil finally resumed it’s running though at an uneven pace at first, and her left eye twitched as the fire sprang back to life.

“...”

“For my first performance I shall make a complete flank out of myself by pitting my might against that of a newborn foal, then I shall share the story of the time I let loose a spout of fire so hot that the sun itself nearly put itself out from shame.” Emphasizing his words Spike hopped on one foot a few times before planting his fist at his sides, and laughing loudly to himself.

“That’s not funny.”

“What was that, little mare? You say that you want The Stupendous and Spectacular Spike’s autograph?” Scaled face set into a smug grin, Spike leaned forward till he was nearly touching noses with a now red faced Trixie.

“That is not how Trixie sounds, now give me my hat back!” Giving another growl Trixie lunged forward trying to swipe her beloved hat with her hooves, so caught up in her annoyance that she seemed to have forgotten about her unicorn given talent.

“But it looks so good on me, plus admit it; I nailed your attitude perfectly.” Like a huge, scaled feline Spike easily avoided Trixie’s attempts at claiming her possession, darting backwards quickly and taunting the mare by blowing a raspberry.

“HA! Attempting to mirror the sparkling personality of the one and only Trixie is leagues beyond your scaled brain, unlike your simple mindset the inner machinations of Trixie’s mind are an enigma.” Despite the verbal lashing that Trixie was sure would have stumped the young dragon long enough for her get her sorely missed heirloom, the mare found much to her annoyance that instead Spike congratulated her for actually knowing a big word.

“Enigma huh?” Clearing his throat for a moment while also making sure to keep an eye on Trixie who was prowling forward with her eyes dead set on Spike’s newest fashion choice, the dragon pretended to primp invisible locks of hair before speaking in his attempt at a feminine voice. “I the Great and Powerful Trixie enjoy acting like a bigshot because I suffer from poor social skills, and can’t comprehend being civil with anything besides my own reflection.” Spike could hardly keep a straight face as the unicorn ceased moving forward in favor of shooting him a dirty look.

“Two can play at that game you peon.” Adopting a dopey look upon her face, and standing on her hind legs (with some difficulty I might say) Trixie rubbed her left hoof on her head and spoke in a deeper tone. “My name’s Spike. I’m fat, lazy, love to complain, and burst into tears every time somepony says something that isn’t a compliment because I’m a complete momma’s colt.” Unlike Spike who had attempted to hide his amusement at Trixie’s earlier irritation, the mare had no qualms about bursting with laughter from the way the dragon’s grin soured into a large frown.

“I AM NOT A MOMMA’S COLT!” Much to Spike’s personal embarrassment images of Celestia spoon feeding him crushed gems, kissing better boo-boos gained from childish games, and the fact that his mother still wrote to him to remind her son to wash behind his frills emerged in his mind. And just like that Spike was stalking toward the still guffawing Trixie, and once she noticed him coming towards her the ladder was on her hooves and marching in his direction. In an instant the dragon and unicorn were face to face locked in another staring contest, and both unwilling to stop the mounting tension that coated the scene like a thick fog.

“Hey lookit that Quirk, I’ll bet my left wing that the those two are about to pitch the proverbial woo.”

“I’d would merrily take you up on that bet Odd if not for two things. One I’m in complete agreement with you brother, and two I don’t believe you have a left wing...or a right one either.”

“Then it’s a bet I can’t lose!”

Though their faces remained in place Spike and Trixie’s eyes were pulled away from one another and focused on what appeared like two pony shaped figures watching them a couple meters down the path. A silence permeated the area for a moment before the mare, and dragon both adopted a reddish tinge to their face, the traveling acquaintances of course knew that their close proximity was only due to a deep seated resentment for one another... nothing else, but to an unknowing passerby the moment could appear...

“Ope! Sorry to ruin the moment strangers, we were just having a walk and heard voices so well...” The speaker happened to be the left earth stallion or more appropriately colt, his hair; a light purple, was brushed to the right on his head yet stayed straight along his tail, though it curled at the tip, and all between was a body painted a rusty red.

“We couldn’t resist investigating, now could we Quirk?” The right colt was actually uncannily similar in appearance to the left, though his voice was higher pitched and carried a tone of amusement instead of the inquisitive one that his fellow possessed. Also, while his fur was the same in color, the mop of purple on his head was brushed to the left instead of right, and his tail was strangely puffed halfway through instead of staying primarily straight. Both twins possessed a matching set of teal colored eyes as well as fetlocks that looked in dire need of some trimming. “Didn’t mean to intrude on your romantic tension any.”

“IT’S NOT LIKE THAT!” In unison Spike and Trixie shouted out a much too late explanation while they scrambled away from one another as fast as they could. “I HATE HIM/HER! HE’S/SHE’S THE BIGGEST PAIN I’VE EVER MET!” Continuing to speak at the same time Spike and Trixie turned from the new arrivals to glare at one another having heard each other’s insult. “HEY!”

While the travelers bickered the left colt dubbed Quirk looked to his brother, raising an eyebrow at the couple’s antics. “Now that is quite the interesting pair, wouldn’t you agree Odd?”

The right colt nodded his head quickly with an entertained smile painted across upon his face as he replied. “How could I not? Those two would certainly shake things up back home, and the town could do with a little excitement.”

Flashing a smile to match his twin’s Quick raised a hoof toward Odd while continuing to watch the the argument that had deteriorated to a one-sided scuffle. “I was thinking the same thing dear brother, now how about we get things moving before we only have one guest instead of two.”

Odd excitedly raised his own limb so he could hoof-bump his brother, then proceeded to approach the dust cloud that had been kicked up by a combination of Trixie’s magic randomly reacting to her anger, as well as Spike’s tail swishing to and fro in an attempt to balance himself when a certain mare grew tired of his uninterrupted possession of her hat.

“Not to interrupt, but perhaps my brother and I could borrow a few minutes of your time?”

The insulting, and tumbling stopped long enough for the dirt to settle, and to show an agitated Trixie currently wrenching Spike’s left arm behind his back while he used his right to keep her hat out of reach. Remembering that they were still very much not alone the duo stopped fighting long enough to begin picking themselves up, or in Spike case he was halfway there before his head was used as a stepping stool so that Trixie could reclaim her hat, and whip his face with her tail while she jumped off of him.

Seeing that they had the duo’s attention Odd nudged his brother prompting the colt to speak before the level of civility began to deteriorate again.

“You see our village lies not too much farther down the road, and I can’t help but believe that you two might be able to aid us with a problem.”

With an uninterested snort Trixie placed her beloved hat upon her head, and set to work adjusting it to her liking while rolling her eyes in the twin’s direction. “Nope.”

“Nope?” Amusement gone from his face Odd’s eyes began to water slightly in response to Trixie’s answer. “B-b-but why not?”

Raising an eyebrow at the emotional colt’s apparent displeasure, Trixie merely raised her head upward while her magic set to work dispelling the few patches of dirt that had gotten on her during her victorious battle against the beast of burden. “Because The Great and Powerful Trixie has much better things to do than offer her time to simple village folk.”

Seeing the colt dubbed Odd growing closer to what looked like letting loose a flood of tears, Spike picked himself up and turned toward his hat obsessed associate. “C’mon Trixie, we can at least hear them out.”

“Oh shut your snout dragon, Trixie has little patience for some bleeding heart routine.”

“Cause merely listening to somepony’s problem, and considering the option of helping out makes one a bleeding heart these days.”

“You catch on quick, there’s hope for you yet dragon.”

“It’s Spike!”

“Who?”

Watching what looked to be another fight about to begin, as well as consoling his sniffling brother Quirk cleared his throat loudly enough to regain the center of attention. “Might we add that your time will be rewarded generously.”

Shooting another scowl toward Spike the blue mare’s head quickly turned back toward the twins while a predatory smirk grew on her face. “While selling her services is typically beneath Trixie’s high standing morals, your story has touched her heart. Please young stallion do share your grievances with the compassionate and empathetic Trixie.”

“Well you see-”

“Especially the part pertaining to how many gifts you plan to offer as tribute to Trixie.”

“...Well you see, our home suffers from a great ailment. It has affected all pony inhabitants from the young to the old, and the hard working to the layabouts.” Nodding toward his still glassy eyed brother Quirk lowered his head to the ground while his vibrantly colored coat seemed to darken. “Since before me and Odd’s times, our village has suffered from...”

“BOREDOM!” Flailing away from his gloom twin Odd wailed loudly as he raised himself onto his back legs. “Mind-numbing, soul-wrenching, earth forsaken BOREDOM!” Through teary eyes Odd looked toward the travelers with a forlorn expression that definitely looked out of place on his cheery face, his vision conjured up an image not of two concerned individuals, but instead of a twitchy eyed mare and a confused drake.

“...What?”

“What my brother speaks of is most true I’m afraid to say.” Raising his head from the ground Quirk wore a look on his face that mirrored his twins... minus the tears and mucus. “Nothing exciting ever takes place, and the worst of all our fellow villagers are becoming... OKAY WITH IT!”

At this both twins wrapped their forelimbs around one another and let loose a shared sigh of depression. In response Spike scratched his head due to a sheer lack of understanding how something like boredom could cause such distress, and Trixie impatiently stomped her hoof down. “Trixie is still waiting to hear about the reward, so she abstains from telling you just how idiotic this sounds.”

Wiping his nose on his left hoof Odd narrowed his teal eyes in Trixie’s direction. “Oh the woe we must suffer through dear brother, at the mercy of your average greed driven unicorn and her draconic lover.”

“Hey!”

Ignoring the shared cries of outrage from our favorite duo, Quirk wiped a tear from his left eye while nodding in agreement to his brother. “I unequivocally agree Odd, but we must not judge others by their kind’s nature, or their choice in sexual deviancy.” Ears twitching in response to the louder outburst of irritation that followed his words Quirk sniffled one last time before he raised his right forelimb to his head dramatically while sighing letting out a loud sigh. “Perhaps these humdrum travelers are more dull than we thought, and do not wish to be buried in the vast bounty of our undoubtedly appreciative village.”

Hearing enough, Trixie growled loudly before her horn glowed angrily with a light magenta aura, almost immediately the twins were raised into the air, and their heads conked together. “Trixie will have you know that she is THE MOST INTERESTING thing your backwater village will ever have the good fortune to witness.” Dropping the two onto the ground Trixie turned around so quickly that her cape whipped into the air nearly catching a less angered but still irritated Spike on the tip of his nose. “Dragon, get to work on pulling Trixie’s carriage, I’ll give these bumpkins a show so great they’ll forsake every dirt-derived god they praise in favor of Trixie’s left hoof.”

“What about the reward?” Though less interested in getting payed for his assistance than the outraged mare, Spike felt less than charitable after being called ‘humdrum’.

“Whatever this village is willing to pay, Trixie wants it DOUBLED!” After slamming the door to her carriage shut Trixie immediately set to work on going through a few props of hers within a trunk next to her bed. “Nopony calls Trixie dull!”

Shaking his head towards Trixie’s carriage, Spike let out a sigh before setting to work on putting the harness back on. After finishing Spike peered in the twin’s direction so see both of them wearing large smiles as well as wagging their tails about excitedly. Almost instantly the gears in Spike’s head began to spin, and an frown grew on his scaled face. 

“You know I’ve witnessed what happens to folks who decide to upset that mare... that whole act could have gotten you turned into crickets.”

Shooting an amused grin to his brother Quirk chuckled to himself before slowly walking down the path towards his village. “And what fine crickets we’d probably have made mister uh... Spike. But your marefriend certainly had us backed into a corner there, and the village sorely needs something to liven things up a good deal.”

“She’s not my marefriend.”

“Sorry to hear that friend, she does seem a bit hard to deal with.” Quirk’s words was quickly reciprocated with a snort, and a small laugh from the young dragon.

“More like arrogant as they come, short-tempered, and suffering from an inferiority complex.” Pulling the carriage forward to follow Quirk down the road a small puff of green fire escaped past his teeth as he remembered that it was Trixie’s ‘hard to deal with personality’ that seemed to be causing all of the trouble he was experiencing. “Trust me Quirk, she’s a lot to handle.”

“Oh I bet she is you ol’ fire-spewer!” Jumping up right next to Spike, Odd gave the drake a wink then whistled appreciatively reminding Spike of a few colts friends he knew back in Ponyville. Oblivious to the way Spike had rolled his eye at his earlier comment Odd nudged the drake with his shoulder with a still amused grin on his face. “Well if you two aren’t butter and bread then do you mind another drago-... er stallion taking a wing at her?”

Initially the colt’s question had caused a frown to begin forming on Spike’s face, but after catching himself as well as questioning why he would even care, the drake saw a way to get a good laugh as well as get back at Trixie for earlier... “By all means go ahead, but warned she’s a feisty one, you’ll have to be persistent.”

“Persistent is my middle name... or was it Timothy?” Shrugging to himself Odd slowed his pace until he was even with the carriage. “Miss Trixie, excuse me for not stating it earlier but you have the most spectacular cutie mark I’ve ever seen.”

“If Trixie catches you staring her flank, you’ll be your brother’s twin sister for the rest of your existence.” Hearing the mare’s threat caused a panicked look to cross Odd’s face and he quickly dashed past Spike to hide behind a snickering Quirk.

Amidst his fit of laughter a tinge of curiosity struck Spike, and once he had managed to reign in his chuckles the dragon’s inquisitive side took the wheel. “So what’s the name of your village anyways?”

 Twin sets of ears perked up in reply to Spike’s question, and both colt’s turned to face the dragon with a familiar set of large smiles. Stamping their hooves in place Odd and Quirk whinnied with pride before Quirk offered a wink, and spoke.

“Hibiscus Grove my good friend, the humble beginning from which our kinds greatest heros have hailed.”

Quickly jumping in to pick up where his brother left off, Odd kicked his legs about excitedly as a merry tone colored his words. “The very earth we commune with sings praise to our line, for only a true pony of the land whose inner magic transmutes into the sweat and toil he offers to the soil can trace his roots back to our home.”

“Hibiscus Grove, the village from which the mighty war horse Comanche strode out of a mere colt, and returned a stallion among stallions.”

“The oldest and most trusted farming techniques owe their first steps to the hardworking citizens of Hibiscus Grove.”

“The birthplace of the beloved hero Chancellor Puddinghead, before her untimely betrayal at the hooves of the calculating assassin of the unicorn king, and the war mongering chief of the pegasus clan.”

As entertaining as the twin’s praise toward their village was, Spike neither slowed his pace down the dirt path, or missed what sounded like a gross error in historical events. “Betrayal? Are you talking about the founding of Equestria?”

Immediately halting in their jovial exclamations the twins set dubious looks toward Spike, an expression made near comical since they were now walking backwards. Odd looked to his brother and motioned toward the drake with unsure look upon his face, prompting Quirk to reply. “Indubitably so, that day marked the creation of the unicorn pegasus empire as well as ushered in the splitting of the earth pony’s civilization.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“As sure as Halle Maree’s horrible decision in playing lead role in the comedic tragedy ‘Feline Mare’.”

“....What?”

“Chancellor Puddinghead braved the wilds of an unknown land so she could free our kind from the shackles of forced cooperation with the unicorns and their illusions of controlling the sun. She ended up discovering that deity blighted land, as well as saving the incompetent flanks of Princess Platinum, and Commander Hurricane.”

“Once again, say what?”

“In her wisdom Puddinghead offered a hoof in friendship to the two overlords, and motioned that the three tribes work in unison without forcing goods from one another. The generous, and soft-hearted mare was quickly stabbed in the back, and her advisor Smart Cookie brainwashed into telling our kin that this ‘Equestria’ was a place of equality and prosperity.” The entire time Quirk spoke his brother Odd nodded enthusiastically, cheered each time Puddinghead was mentioned, and booed when the other two pony’s names were said.

Spike having heard enough shook his head, and gave a quick glance to the carriage behind him wondering if Trixie had heard any of the rubbish being forced through his ears. “I’m pretty sure that isn’t how it went down guys, if this was true how would anypony know?”

“When the naive, and easily mislead half of the earth pony tribe left it was our ancestors who saw beyond the veil of deceit that the unicorns, and pegasi had crafted. When the stories had reached our village about how Chancellor Puddinghead had cast the first stone, our forefathers knew it to be some kind of unicorn plot, or pegasus fib so they formulated the most likely scenario that would have taken place.”

The twins galloped to a nearby bush pulling out a few loose branches, some leaves, and a large rock which Odd rolled back to the center of the road. With his path blocked Spike had to stop and attempted to figure out why Odd licked a short stick and stuffed it between the hair on his head, for what purpose was a crude face drawn onto the rock as well as two branch covered in leaves placed behind, and more importantly why Quirk had a light blue marker hidden in his tail.

After poofing up the hair on his head slightly Quirk strode forward, struck up a regal pose, and placed a hoof to his chest. “I, the mighty and wise Chancellor Puddinghead, born among proud farms of Hibiscus Grove do claim this land in the name of not just my beloved earth pony kin, but instead for all three of the clans! Let our tribes no longer quarrel, and instead work together for a better tomorrow where they can all trot hoof in hoof for friendship and empathy.”

Behind Quirk his brother who was made to look like a unicorn (though badly from Spike’s point of view) drew behind the earth pony stepping on the tips of his hooves in a sneaky fashion. Oblivious to Odd’s actions Quirk continued to speak, his eyes looking over Spike, the carriage and the road behind them as if inspecting a new land.

“Yes, this is a fertile land, and together we shall thrive. Looking to his left Quirk nodded as if listening to some unseen entity. “I agree, advisor Smart Cookie, we will have to name this wondrous place.” Looking back toward Spike, Odd placed a hopeful and determined look upon his face before stomping his left hoof down dramatically. “We will rule over this land, and we shall call it....’This Land’.”

Only a few inches behind his twin now Odd let loose a sinister chuckle before hissing loudly. “I think we should call it.....YOUR GRAVE!” Odd then immediately began poking his brother’s side with the stick on his head while switching between laughing maniacally, and shouting “Pew! Pew!”

In response Quirk gasped dramatically, and flopped onto his side kicking out his legs in mock pain while his brother began to prance about in victory. “Ah, curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal Princess Platinum!”

“Ha Ha HA! Mine is an evil laugh... now die!” Odd then dramatically placed his makeshift horn to Quirk’s heart and shouted “Thundaga!” Which caused Quirk to spasm as if electrocuted, as well as cause Odd’s ‘horn’ to fall out of his hair.”

After a few moments Quirk suddenly picked his head off the ground with a serious expression looking straight toward Spike. “And that is how our beloved hero met a grisly fate at the hooves of the treacherous unicorns.” Eyes quickly darting from one side to another Quirk placed a hoof next to his mouth as if to whisper to the bemused dragon. “All the while the pegasus commander watches from the sidelines... biding his time and preparing for his civilizations time to strike.” To this Odd quickly moved toward the the rock and used his hooves to block out the sun so the pegasus stand-in looked shrouded in shadows.

Both colts looked toward Spike who out of appreciation for the twin’s passionate performance clapped his hands together though he rolled his eyes at the same time. “Well that was certainly... something.”

“Did you like it?” Shaking his head until his poofy hair resumed it’s original state Quirk offered a small bow as did his brother.

“We actually got an award for that a few seasons ago during the “Remembering Great Figures in Earth Pony History festival.” After his bow Odd’s smiling face switched to a small frown, and he pawed at the ground a bit. “Though all we got as a ‘good job’, and a basketful of onions.”

Sighing in response Quirk nodded to his brother before adding with sarcasm. “One of the greatest honors our village can give.”

Chuckling at the twin’s antics Spike stretched his limbs before continuing forward, as he passed the still standing in place twins Spike opted to jump back to the current issue regarding historic accuracy. “As interesting as that was guys, every book I’ve read through states that there was no backstabbing, no brainwashing, and that it was Smart Cookie who voted on equality for all equines.”

Turning around and keeping pace with Spike, Odd cocked his head to the side raised an eyebrow. “And how would a dragon know so much about pony history?”

Mirroring his twin Quirk trotted alongside Spike as well an inquisitive look plastered upon his face. “You know brother that’s an incredibly good question, strange enough to see a dragon in these parts, but now we have a dragon that courts unicorns and claims to know about the going-ons of past events regarding our kind.”

Fixing a scowl toward Quirk for his ‘courting’ comment Spike turned toward the read ahead with a far off look on his face. “Probably because I’m from Equestria myself.” Noticing the matching expressions of shock that appeared on the twin’s face Spike sighed to himself before continuing. “I was born in Canterlot where I spent most of my childhood till my sister and I moved to a place called Ponyville.”

“Are you saying dragons like you live in Equestria just like the ponies?”

“Well... I haven’t met any dragons ‘like me’, but yeah there’s a few dragons that live there though they mostly keep to themselves and sleep.” Spike paused to glance at the colt’s when they both gasped in surprise, apparently their understanding of Equestria was somewhat... dated. “What’s the big deal, all kinds of creatures live somewhat neighborly in Equestria. There’s mules, goats, buffaloes, griffons, diamond dogs, and the occasional peryton.”

“...Interesting.” Quirk brought his hoof to his chin as if in deep thought, his brother on the other hand began to skip as he trotted next to Spike.

“Exciting! You see, the two of you will be a hit!” Looking toward his twin Odd sped around the drake, and extended his hoof toward his Quirk for another hoof-bump. 

“Even more so than the time those nomadic zebras passed through, and we chose to ‘liberate’ that caged Nandi bear they were transporting.” With a large grin growing upon his features that matched his brothers Quirk quickly reciprocated the hoof-bump.

So wrapped up in deducing the levels of havoc a newly freed bear might have wreaked upon a village of ponies, Spike was caught off guard when another voice joined the conversation.

“Trixie is starting to become less and less enthused about doing any favors for these two mischief makers.”

The twins who lacked any understanding of the many windows, doors, and tricks that Trixie’s wagon had installed wore matching expression of surprise due to the unicorn’s sudden appearance through her window. Though the mare’s sudden entrance nearly caused Spike to miss a step, the dragon opted to continue his trek forward while he replied.

“For once I have to agree with you Trixie, but they did mention a reward and maybe we can get a better bearing on where we are if the village could provide a map.”

“Speaking of rewards... have you negotiated the actual size of the bounty Trixie is to be given?” Spikes’s imminent silence combined with the the snicker that emitted from Odd caused Trixie to let out a small growl of irritation. “Of course you haven’t, too busy wasting time with nonsensical small talk.”

“Hey! I was ju-” Spike’s attempt at explaining himself was loudly interrupted by a few ‘Tuts’ from Trixie as well as a rock surrounded in her magic bouncing off of his head.

“It would seem Trixie will just have to do EVERYTHING that requires a degree of intelligence doesn’t it?” With a smirk from seeing the drake bristle at her remark, Trixie fixed a leer toward the twins and continued. “Now then. How much is the Great and Powerful Trixie being paid to waste her time at your silly town?”

Happy to be addressed by the blue unicorn, Odd was more than eager to prance beside the cart and offer a small bow before speaking. “Well oh so enchanting one, I’m more than sure that our village will gladly present you with it’s finest produce as well as a large bag of pieces.”

Crossing her forelimbs, and proceeding to lazily rest her head upon them Trixie raised an eyebrow in Odd’s direction. “Trixie prefers to receive an actual number regarding the number of pieces you plan to pay her, keep in mind the greatness of Trixie’s performance is impacted by how cheap your village tries to be.”

While he pondered about the value of something called a ‘piece’ Spike had to nod his head in approval of Trixie’s business sense. Though she was headstrong, vain, and irritating most of the time, the mare certainly knew how to get what she wanted.

“I’m sure after an exciting performance our fellows will be happy to pay your requested dues. Isn’t that right brother?” Feeling his knees wobbling from gaining the unicorn’s focused attention, a small blush formed on Odd’s face while he set to work on telling the mare anything she wanted to hear.

Seeing that his enamored brother was quick to write a check that they truthfully didn’t know if Hibiscus Grove would be willing to cash Quirk rolled his eyes, waited in place until he was alongside Odd, and bopped his sibling on the head.

“Ow! What in polka dotted sassafras was that for?”

Nudging his dismayed brother aside, Quirk cast an apologetic look toward the dubious unicorn. “What my enthusiastic brother means to say is, we wholeheartedly believe that the villages payment will be appropriate to your level of performance.” Seeing Trixie’s curious expression begin to morph to one of outrage at his less than pleasing answer Quirk was quick to cover his flank. “N-not to say that anything you did for our village wouldn’t deserve a worthy prize, but neither we or our village have any proof to your abilities besides your word.”

Horn glowing from a sudden surge of her magic Trixie levitated a nearby rock willing it to float between herself and Quirk. “Do you not believe that Trixie’s word is enough?”

Eyeing the flying stone warily Quirk gulped before looking back to the smirking unicorn. “Perhaps we do, but we can’t say the same for a village full of our kin that are less than trusting of unicorns and their magic.”

Trixie appreciated the colt’s truthfulness as well as the provided information that she would be putting on a show for a village of lowly magic fearing earth ponies. Looking to Spike, Trixie noticed that his ears were poised to hear the conversation the three were having, but oddly enough he had stayed silent since her reprimanding. The young dragon looked strangely less irritating when he wasn’t arguing with everything Trixie had to say, and an odd calmness overtook the mare as she debated tossing the rock at his head... to hear him complain of course.

Just as Odd was about to jump back into the conversation both he and his brother let out a small gasp of surprise as the glowing rock began to chip away before their very eyes. As if being carved by an invisible edge, slivers and small bits of the stone began to fall to the earth the entire time a bored expression was painted on the mare’s face though her eyes seemed fixated on the quiet dragon.

After a moment the stone resembled a small grey figurine crafted in the image of the very dragon that still pulled the carriage along, finally processing the twin’s gasp in her preoccupied brain Trixie pulled her eyes from the drake to see the product of her unharnessed magic. Trixie wasn’t surprised that even without even meaning too she was capable of making something eye catching out of a simple rock, but after realizing what the miniature statue resembled the unicorn frowned and quickly turned it into nothing more than glittering dust.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie will put her faith in your village’s ability to properly pay for her services. Now how far away is it?”

“Odd and I will run ahead and see.” Elbowing his brother who had been sneezing from a nose full of dust, Quirk nodded toward the unicorn before the two siblings galloped past Spike and around a nearing bend ahead. Once the twins were out of sight Trixie sighed loudly hoping to prompt some sort of response from the still quiet dragon.

“...”

Not surprised that the slow-witted dragon was unable to pick up on her attempt at starting conversation, Trixie rolled her eyes and coughed into her left hoof.

“...”

Eye twitching from the drake’s continued refusal to say anything Trixie uncrossed her forelimbs, and glared darkly at the back of Spike’s head before clearing her throat loudly.

“Something wrong, Trixie?” Refusing to turn around because of the toothy grin that was plastered on his face, Spike luckily had managed to hide the amusement in his voice.

“Of course not! Why would something be wrong?”

“It just sounds like you might,” he snickered, “want a glass of water or something that’s all.” Spike felt the glare intensify so he plastered on a neutral face and turned to face the mare.

“...So smart-flank, what do you think about those two?” Trixie could have sworn she heard the Spike let out a small laugh before turning, and the dragon was obviously struggling to keep his bad poker face from cracking, but the unicorn wasn’t in the mood to get into it with her scaled companion.

Spike scratched his chin for a moment as he mulled over Trixie’s question. Quirk, and Odd were certainly... strange, but they didn’t look dangerous and a village full of expectant ponies eager for entertainment certainly beat one full of unicorn suspicious citizens who might chase the two out before Spike learned anything about their location. 

“I think that it’s a better idea to make friends than enemies given our situation, and if you think that you can truly give them a great performance without agitating the whole population supplies would be really nice right now.”

“Are you calling my abilities into question again?” 

“Actually no.” A small smile formed on Spike’s face as he watched Trixie’s narrowed eyes open wide in surprise. “I’m just saying that hopefully you’ve come up with something that won’t end with a town full of earth ponies burning you at the stake.”

“...W-well it’s about time you admit to Trixie’s greatness, and don’t worry your scaled brain dragon, Trix-”

“We’re back!” Returning from around the bend Odd followed by his brother pranced toward the carriage with a large grin on his face. Coming to stop next to Spike, Odd was practically dancing on the tip of his hooves while his brother caught up and began to speak.

“It would seem in our short travel together that we’ve entered the very outskirts of Hibiscus Grove, just around this bend the trees will dwindle in number and you’ll be able to see our homes.”

Raising an eyebrow Spike looked back toward a contemplative Trixie before turning back to face Quirk. “Surprised we’ve gotten this close without bumping into any of your friends.”

Piping up before his brother could muster a response Odd hopped up and down in barely contained excitement. “Me and Quirk completely forgot that today is Jubilation Day!”

“What?”

Seeing the matching looks of confusion on Spike and Trixie’s face, Quirk stepped forward and picked up where his brother left off. “Jubilation Day is the time of year where our village’s proud citizens gather together to feast on the bounty of our hard work, as well as listen to our lord retell stories of our town’s accomplishments.” An excited glint flashed in Quirk’s eyes as a wide smile grew across his face. “Everypony in the village is gathered at the town square, so the timing is perfect for our special guest, don’t you agree?”

From her window Trixie’s eyes twinkled with the excitement that came with knowing that she was about to shock, and awe entire population with her special brand of greatness. Casting a large grin toward the twins and wink toward Spike, Trixie quickly came up with an entrance worthy of ‘The Great and Powerful Trixie’.

“Here’s what Trixie wants you to do.”

A few minutes later:

Within the humble village of Hibiscus Grove all of it’s hard working citizens were hard at work putting the final touches to one of it’s oldest traditions. Booths were set up where individuals, and families would sell their wares to one another at discount prices, the spirit of the celebration at hand convincing even the greediest and proudest to lower their requested payment in good spirit to their neighbors. From the ponies that toiled for hours in the fields to grow crop, to the artsy shut ins who spent a few smug moments staring at a canvas just to splotch a few drops of paint and dub it a masterpiece, every pony in town was gathered and happily sharing the fruits of their varying levels of labor with one another.

At the moment the village’s highest noble Archduke Tapioca Brain the Third overlooked his towns ponies happily enjoying themselves... within agreeable procedures, and guidelines. Since Tapioca Javen Brain’s grandfather had begun his own regime many, many years ago the ponies of Hibiscus Grove were instructed to reign in all desires to ‘fly off the handle’, ‘carry on insistently’, or ‘behave unnecessarily’ in any scenario. The reasoning was partly due to Tapioca Brain the First’s small heart condition, his inability to take a joke, and his disagreement with any levels of excitement. So with the use of strict ruling, and the subtle spreading of propaganda that stated that high levels of unrestrained enthusiasm acted as beacons for trouble-making witch ponies, and violence hungry winged ponies by the time that the First passed his title down to his eldest son Tapioca Brain the Second, the denizens of Hibiscus Grove were calm, and highly believed in a no nonsense lifestyle. All in all the rules set in place seemed to be for the good of the village, accidents were always low, emotions never ran high, and all of the villagers were content... just not overly so. Thrill-seeking pegasi never bothered to visit, hearing that the Grovians were boring, and tended to abhor excitement. Unicorns seeking to widen their magical views of the world avoided the town thanks to common knowledge that it’s population of earth ponies feared the visually appealing, and titillatingly cool abilities that their horned cousins possessed.

Dull grey eyes glanced at the marble statue that sat in the middle of town center, with a smile Tapioca Brain wondered how proud his ancestor the wise Chancellor Puddinghead would be of him and his father for keeping the town safe, and it’s ponies happy. Like the lords before him Tapioca wore the large hat shaped like a bowl of bland, and tasteless tapioca pudding, when he was young Tapioca Brain often questioned the wearing of helm that depicted something so unexciting, and devoid of flavor, in return his father shared a tidbit of lunacy that had been passed down to him from his own father.

“The grandness of Tapioca pudding lies in it’s blandness my son, for you see when dining on such a dish you know what to expect so a pony can never complain of a bad taste because frankly they exactly what to expect the moment they dip in for the first bite. When our subjects look upon our iconic hat they are reminded of the greatness that exuded from our ancestor Puddinghead, and then can rest assured that there will be no unexpected change in flavor from us. We are bland, our intent is easy to ascertain, and we are unchanging; truly we are symbols of leadership that ponies need in these troubling times.”

Eventually Tapioca Brain the Third came to understand his father’s words, and now proudly shared the same image of blandness that his forefathers represented. His rule was fair, his village prosperous, and it’s citizens abiding to his grandfathers laws... well most of them.

The Peculiar Twins... brothers born from Tapioca’s grandfather’s sister’s unusual son. A constant nuisance, and embarrassingly enough close family of the ruling nobles. While all other ponies strived to work toward a long life of humdrum tasks, and unexciting missions in doing what was expected of them in Hibiscus Grove’s society, the twins were always trying to inspire unnecessary moments of excitement, and were at the heart of anything interesting that went down without proper regulation. It frustrated Tapioca to know that his cousins bared a closer resemblance to their shared ancestor Puddinghead than he did, their hair and tails exhibiting curls and poofs while his merely hung straight and uninspired.

“Brothers and Sisters of Hibiscus Grove! It is I, Odd Peculiar!”

“And me, Quirk Peculiar!”

“And the two of us are here to provide you with something unlike anything you’ve ever bore witness too.”

It would seem that thinking about the troublesome twins for more than a second had summoned the duo, and now with a large sigh Tapioca rolled his eyes as he watched his cousins gallop around the town center while spouting nonsense.

“Our love for this grand ol’ town, and it’s wonderful citizens has possessed us to search far, and wide to present you with unparalleled wonders, and we can happily say that we have succeeded.”

Both colts let loose laughter fitting that of a maniacal scientist, or perhaps a victorious villain as they stood proudly next to the beloved statue of Chancellor Puddinghead. 

Raising his left hoof into the air while his brother Odd raised his right, Quirk beamed happily at the crowd before speaking loud enough for the whole staring population to hear. “So then fine ponies of the earth. WHAT SAY THEE?!”

A stunned silence followed soon after, fillies and colts had their mouths shushed by their parents who themselves cast plate sized eyes toward the twins. Ponies close to the brother’s age began to gather to one another intent on whispering about just how wacky Odd was, or how how weird Quirk tended to be, while the elder’s felt their hearts begin to race in a fashion that seemed distant but familiar. For a long moment only the sound of Archduke Tapioca groaning to himself, and slapping a hoof to his face dared to pierce the eerie calm before the storm.

“I say quit acting like a couple of screwballs, and do something productive for once!” And like that the silence was over and the stunned expressions were beginning to morph into ones of agitation.

“Yeah! How come you two gotta be rockin the dang boat all the time?”

“By the lords of soil and sediment, is this going to be like that time you convinced that group of traveling minstrel donkeys to expose the town to their whole second album? Most of us are still recovering from that!”

“What if they hired another so called super hero? Remember Puma-Mare?”

“Don’t even kid about that, Crow! Her costume was ridiculous, and last time I checked pumas don’t fly.”

Tapioca Brain held his head in his hooves for a moment as he watched what had started out as a pleasant, controlled level of happiness inducing celebration turn into what could possibly be a full blown riot. He raised his left hoof in preparation for commanding his guards to escort the twins from the area, when Odd let out a merry laugh loud enough to quiet the angry ponies.

“HAHAHA! Oh you silly colts and fillies, truly your shouts of disagreement will change to cheers of praise once you see....” A sound similar to the squeaking of a cart’s wheels began to grow in volume from down a path leading into the forest.

“The Great!” The sound of wooden wheels traveling down the road, and past where the town’s gates stood was now loud and clear for the entire crowd causing numerous heads to turn toward the sound.

Standing next to his brother, Quirk flexed his two forelimbs as he shouted above the approaching sound. “THE POWERFUL!” Before the very eyes of the entire population of Hibiscus Grove a large carriage raced into view, pulled by an invisible force that the watching villagers could hear impacting the ground with quick, solid feet. Suddenly the carriage leaped into the air as if possessed by an unseen power, the vehicle coming high enough to block out the sun and cover the watching crowd in it’s shadow. Finally the carriage returned to the earth, it’s wooden wheels creaking in protest and it came to a stop before the statue of Puddinghead herself just as the twins raised their forelimbs into the sky while shouting.

“TRIXIE!”

The carriage emitted a sound like that of a firecracker, as three of it’s walls split apart and fell to stand splayed out like a stage. A mysterious light blue smoke hissed from the still standing wall, blocking the population’s view of the carriage’s innard, and from within the smoke multiple glowing missiles rocketed into the air and exploded bathing the watching ponies different vibrant light. The loud sound of hooves tapping onto the wood of the cart brought the mesmerized eyes of the audience back toward the carriage, within the now dissipating smoke the form of a pony began to become recognizable.

As the light blue mare donning a large smirk became visible for all to see, mutters of interest began to arise from the earth ponies.

“Quite an entrance..”

“Is she a unicorn?”

“I really like her mane.”

“This is a nightmare!” Rubbing a hoof on his throbbing temple Tapioca Brain was already pondering the levels of the unregulated excitement the twins were about to cause.

Clearing her throat to make sure she had every ponies undivided attention, Trixie strode forward till she was at the end of her stage her violet eyes flashing as she began to speak. “Ponies of Hibiscus Grove! The Great and Powerful Trixie has been called upon to provide you with the greatest show that you have or ever will see!”

A series of gasp emitted from the crowd as Trixie’s cape fluttered in a non existent wind, and behind the mare ethereal shapes began to form, and contort until they looked like see through, blue diamond dogs. The beasts numbered at nearly a dozen and they sniffed about the stage, growling, and snarling at ponies that stared at them for too long, the entire time Trixie gauged the crowd's response while she looked upon the mass of earth ponies.

“Known as one... if not the most powerful sorceress in the land it was I The Great and Powerful Trixie that rid the far off northern roads of a vicious pack of diamond dog marauders, and banished them back to the holes in the ground from whence they came.” One of the lead dogs flashed it’s see through fangs, and made a dash for the edge as if to leap off the stage and maul a filly who stared with wide eyes. Just as the dog sprang forward, and the crowd let loose cries of fear and worry for the scared stiff filly a sudden bolt of magic struck the creature causing it to whine pitifully before it exploded into a blue mist that tickled the filly’s nose and caused her to sneeze. 

After allowing the crowd to let out a shared “D’aww..” Trixie tilted her hat, just as the rest of the magically created dogs began to work themselves into a frenzy and charge her. The crowd now fully caught up in the excitement cried out toward the mare who seemed unaware of the approaching danger, but the mixed “Watch out!” and “Turn around!”s quickly changed to “oohs” and “ahhs” as Trixie pivoted on her left hoof and willed a wall of magic to appear just in time for the dogs to comically splat against it’s surface.

“That’s totally not what happened!”

A moment passed during which Trixie narrowed her eyes at the familiar voice of the only creature willing to nick-pick at such unimportant bits of information. Quick on her hooves so as not to lose the crowd Trixie willed two large twin orbs of glowing magic to dance above her hat, and as they floated to and fro the orbs left lines of light that trailed in the air for a few seconds before fading. With a smirk Trixie raised a hoof into the air, and a few watching ponies clapped their hooves as the audience watched the orbs spiral around one another, separate, and fly about until the glowing lines the marked their paths painted an image of a small beach beside a large lake.

“Not very far from here lies an immense lake, it’s size bordering that of a sea or ocean.” The orbs stopped leaving a trail behind them and stood in place side by side in the middle of the lake giving the appearance of two large glowing eyes peeking at the spectators. “Within the lake a monstrous sea creature lies in wait for any unsuspecting traveler who comes near.”

Fearful whispers emitted from the crowd since many of the villagers had heard rumors of the great beasts of the lake only a days travel away from their home.

“This beast was large enough that it’s head nearly touched the clouds, and a single sweep of it’s fins could cause tidal waves!” Lines began to twist, and turn as the image of the lake warped into that of a large monster rearing it’s head from out of the lake’s surface, and reaching a large webbed hand toward a tiny pony now drawn onto the beach. “That very beast made the grievous mistake of picking a fight with Trixie.”

A large flash of light temporarily blinded the earth ponies, and when they could see again they witnessed the pony in the picture coming to life and charging at the now moving monster that strained toward the tiny pony. The pony narrowly dodged a massive hand that impacted the beaches surface, and quickly scaled up the creature’s arm before striking the monster dead in the face with a blast of magic.

As the monster let out an inaudible roar of defeat, and sunk back into its watery home, Trixie took a bow prompting the entire audience to clap loudly, and excitedly at her efforts. “Truly there is none greater than The Great and Powerful Trixie!”

From his hidden spot behind the carriage Spike grumbled to himself in annoyance as he was forced to listen to Trixie’s shameless self-promoting as well as note that his ‘assistance’ hadn’t been mentioned at all so far. Now Spike wasn’t one for fame, nor did he seek out the spotlight very often, but he did like to be credited for his contributions to whatever occurrence he ended up wrapped in. Before the grand entrance Trixie had made it quite clear that she didn’t intend to share any spotlight, nor did she need any help from a dragon she could barely stand. So Spike’s role came in the form of pulling her carriage along while under the guise of simple illusion Trixie had cast that hid him from view for a few seconds, and now he was to sit quietly while the egotistical show pony weaved an intricate tapestry of complete goat manure. 

As much as Spike hated to admit it, though her tales were certainly far from the truth Trixie was putting on quite the show, and the audience seemed pretty entertained. Resting his head on the ground Spike let out a small sigh, at least things were going smoothly.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie is so great in fact, that she challenges this village’s ponies to match their talent against hers!”

“...No”

“You there! Trixie sees that your cutie mark is that of a rope knot, do you dare defend your honor and try to out knot Trixie?”

“Is this some kind of cruel sick joke?”

The sound of some pony cautiously climbing onto the stage caused Spike to lower his ears in disagreement, and after a moment the crowd let out a small unsure cheer as Trixie undoubtedly managed to beat the poor pony as well as make a bad winner out of herself.

“This is already getting out of hand.” Smacking his right hand onto his face Spike groaned as he heard Trixie accept a challenge from what sounded like an offended stallion. A few moments later Trixie’s laughter rang out loudly, only matched by a mixture of applause and some booing that began to grow in intensity. “Certainly she wasn’t so vain as to be oblivious to the agitated comments, and the sound of pitchforks being gathered at the back of the crowd.”

“Trixie rule Hibiscus Grove!”

“That’s enough.” Growling at Trixie’s behavior Spike stretched his limbs, then proceeded to hop over the carriage wall he was hiding behind, and land somewhat gracefully onto the stage which prompted a gasp of surprise from Trixie... as well as the rest of the audience. Realizing that another reason he was forced to remain hidden was due to the Hibiscus Grove’s citizens having an incredibly small number of run ins with dragons, Spike gulped as he watched the citizens expressions change from agitation to pure terror. “...uhh Hi.”

It was absolute chaos from the point on.
 
“DRAGON!!”

“Sorceress save us!”

“ERMAHGERD DURGAN!”

“You see! This is why I don’t leave my house, the real world sucks!”

Always one to capitalize on an opportunity Trixie reared back on her hind legs and shouted out to the panicking villagers. “Worry not my audience, for this terrifying drake is no match for The Great and Powerful Trixie!” 

“W-wait what?!” Before Spike knew what was happening four magic tendrils manifested before Trixie, and struck out faster than he could react. Within a split second Spike the dragon was now hogtied and looking a wee bit annoyed at the unicorn that placed a triumphant hoof onto his slumped over form.

“You may thank Trixie at your leisure now.” With smug smirk Trixie cast a wink toward Spike who much to her enjoyment grumbled to himself in reply. Now safe from the wyrm’s fiery wrath, the earth ponies let out ‘whoops’ and ‘hoorays’ loudly, while cheering Trixie’s name in praise.

“Hooray for Trixie!”

“Yay Trixie!”

“Slay the dragon!”

That last cheer had prompted Trixie to blink in surprise as well as cause Spike to sputter loudly.

“H-hey isn’t that a bit much!” Spike turned his eyes to Trixie who looked just as panicked as he did, much to the drakes dismay.

“Do it!”

“Yeah, Trixie keep us safe from the dragon!”

“U-uh The Great and Powerful Trixie would much prefer to punish this foul beasts than spill it’s blood on her stage.” After hearing a few cheers, as well as a few ideas from her audience Trixie regained her stage voice, and set to work on circling the still bound dragon. “Perhaps Trixie should force the drake to apologize to my appreciative spectators, or maybe trim it’s claws and spines like one would a naughty feline.” It dawned upon Trixie that at the moment her infuriating travel companion was at her complete an utter mercy, and even if he was able to free himself there was little Spike could do that wouldn’t damage the progress Trixie had managed to make. 

From his position Spike couldn’t help but notice the smirk that had grown into the unicorn’s face, nor could he ignore the sudden shiver that went down his spine. 

“Maybe Trixie shall let the drake go if he promises to be a good little dragon, and admit defeat by Trixie’s hooves.” As she spoke Trixie willed Spike’s bindings to levitate raising her captive while he squawked in surprise until he hung in the air for the whole population to see.

From his new floating position Spike scowled at the mare, and whispered a nearly inaudible hiss. “Hahaha... you’ve had your fun now ease off.”

“Do you hear that my fantastic audience? This drake dares to command the Great and Powerful Trixie, perhaps a quick death would be would be a proper means to silence his serpent tongue.” Once Spike had lost the defiant fire in his emerald eyes, and he finally admitted to her superiority Trixie would be give him a slap on the wrist and send the drake on his way until she gathered him later. “What’ll it be drake? Admit Trixie’s greatness, or let the audience decide how we should best end you?”

“Just put an end to me already then, anything would be better than having to suffer through that last bit you called a performance.” Having heard enough from Trixie, the disgruntled drake chose to at least share his point of view before he was put to the mercy of the watching crowd. The growl that escaped past the frown that had formed on Trixie’s had been expected, but the few chuckles that emitted from the crowd had not been.

From the rear of the crow Tapioca Brian snickered from behind his hooves, true he certainly didn’t agree with the dazzling light show that the magician had put on, or the surge of anxious energy that had been caused by the fire-spouter’s appearance but just like his subjects the archduke was now completely sucked into the spectacle before his eyes. From the sidelines Odd and Quirk hoof-bumped out of pride for how well their scheme had worked out.

“What do you plan on doing for your grand exit? Probably something along the lines of filling yourself with enough hot air to cause you and this wagon to float into the sunset, right?” 

This time the chuckles were full on bouts of laughter accompanied by few whistles, and one enthusiastic stallion shouting “For the love of soil and sediment the dragon tells jokes!”

“I can do a lot more than that if a certain somepony would put me down already.” Spike turned his head to glare at his magical captor who returned the scowl along with blowing a raspberry. A series of murmurs, and whispers went through the crowd as the earth ponies debated authorizing the release of possibly dangerous dragon.

Feeling it was his station to address his subject’s concerns, Tapioca Brain cleared his throat before striding to the front of the audience. “No offense Mister Dragon, but I’m sure you can understand why we’d be less than willing to allow you to run rampant. It was quite lucky for us that the Great and Powerful Trixie was here to apprehend you before you did anything thrilling *cough*... I mean threatening.” The Archduke’s word were immediately followed by multiple sounds of agreement coming from the villagers behind him, something that cause Spike to sweat slightly.

“Oh don’t worry about this lug, folks!” Sliding into view in front of Spike and Trixie, Odd waved his hooves in the air in an attempt to ease the crowd.

“Truth be told we hired our splendid scaled friend here as entertainment, much like our esteemed guest Trixie here.” Quick to follow his brother’s lead, Quirk stood next to the still floating drake, and patted Spike on the head as one would a pet. “Our good friend here merely got overly excited for his turn to excite, and amaze and popped up before we could properly introduce him.”

Green eyes narrowed at the head patting Spike resisted the urge to growl, only because Quirk shot him an apologetic look before turning back to the crowd.

Now the earth ponies eagerly chatted amongst themselves as the prospect of a real life dragon following up a spell-caster had even the elderly twitching anxiously.

“What kind of tricks can a dragon do?”

Spines perking up at hopefully a chance to absolve his less than agreeable situation, Spike nodded his head frantically as he replied. “Well I’d be happy to show you if we can do something about these binds.”

Rolling her eyes at the loss of her fun Trixie flicked her tail to the right in disapproval and the tendrils immediately vanished, but instead of falling to the stage with a crash Spike twisted around and landed with the grace of cat. A portion of the crowd clapped at the dragon’s unexpected dexterity, one of them being Tapioca Brain who was actually more interested in the scene then he’d like to admit.

“Much better.” Stretching his limbs to relieve some stiffness that had built up, Spike cast a long glance onto the crowd before settling his gaze on a certain azure unicorn who appeared to be busying herself admiring her hooves.

Sensing Spike’s gaze upon her Trixie looked up to lock her violet eyes with the drake’s emerald ones, feeling a familiar need to egg her companion on Trixie gave a large smirk in his direction. “Like there’s anything that newt could do that could possible match my performance.”

Picking up the silent challenge Spike snorted causing light green embers to spark into the air from his nostrils causing the watching earth ponies to ‘ooh’ while subconsciously taking steps back. “Let’s see how they like this.”

Taking a large intake of air Spike puffed out his cheeks, and pointed his snout into the sky. A moment passed before suddenly the drake opened his maw, and a near blinding geyser of neon green fire climbed nearly twenty feet into the air. The ponies below were painted shades of green as they basked in the light made by the flames, and from their startled faces a large cheer roared into the air.

“Mares and gentlecolts!” Snapping his jaws close with a loud snap, Spike offered the watching villagers a large hopefully non-threatening smile toothy smile, and gave a bow. “For my first trick...” Spike wracked his brain for a quick moment trying to think of something entertaining besides blowing fire into the air, noticing Trixie glaring at him from his peripherals a light-bulb dinged in his thoughts.

“I shall teach a mare how to fly!”

Immediately the crowd exploded with young fillies, and mares raising their hooves into the air while loudly volunteering to be chosen. The only pony who seemed uninterested was a dubious Trixie who inwardly searched through her magical knowledge on any spells that could give an earth bound pony the gift of flight. 

“Aha! And now I believe we have ourselves a volunteer folks!”

Pulling herself away from her musings Trixie scanned the crowd for the chosen mare, admittedly interested in seeing the poor dolt that Spike would mostly likely end up humiliating. Focusing so hard on picking out a mare that would be jubilantly making her way toward the stage the blue mare was completely oblivious to the scaled form that had snuck behind her.

“On the count of three!” Nearly jumping out of her own skin from the loud voice that rang into her ears, Trixie only had enough time to gasp in surprise before a pair of hands firmly yet gently grasped her midsection. 

“Dragon, don’t you dare!”

“Not my name.” After chuckling at the incredulous look that his reply put on Trixie’s face, Spike raised his head to look toward the crowd. “1...!”

“Trixie will only give one warning you spark-puking, slime-coated...” During her threat Trixie attempted to flail out of the dragon’s grasp, but surprisingly enough Spike was able to keep a good hold on her without harming the mare.

“Tut tut tut Trixie, compliments won’t save ya now.” His captives shriek only served to cause Spike to shudder with suppressed laughter as he once again called out to the audience that had now joined him in counting. “...2!”

“Drag...I-I mean S-spike!” Trixie gritted her teeth as she tried to will a magical fist into existence so she could bash the dragon’s head in, but all her horn did in response was sizzle and spark thanks to her panic ruining her concentration.

“Too little too late, Trix.” Calculating the trajectory he was about to send his hapless associate on Spike let loose two columns of green fire from his nostrils as he, and the crowd let out a loud. “3!”

“Spi-iiiiiike!” And like that Trixie went higher than the spout of emerald fire the drake had let loose moments before, her cape whipping in the wind, and her hat falling off to land gracefully onto Spike’s noggin. A moment passed until Trixie finally took a moment to take in the sight of the area below her; Spike, the crowd, and even her stage looked like ants and for a moment Trixie was caught up in the thrill of being so high up, that is until gravity said hello.

Down below the whole crowd watched in morbid fascination as the Great and Powerful Trixie flailed her limbs about with the grace and technique of a chicken attempting to fly. To add emphasis to the rapidly approaching unicorn Quirk procured a drum set from seemingly nowhere and his brother Odd immediately began to do a quick drum roll.

“So this is how it ends? Reduced to an attractive smear on my own stage by some idiotic dragon, if I survive this... the dragon will pay.” Closing her eyes, and ready to meet her maker Trixie wondered if her eventual collision with the earth would be a traumatic one, or quick and painless one.

“Geez Trixie if I didn’t know better I’d think you were actually worried about hitting the ground.”

Welp that was it, either Trixie had died instantaneously and had gone to the only place the cursed dragon would likely end up in the afterlife, or infuriatingly enough she was never in any danger to begin with. Noticing that she couldn’t smell brimstone, and when she opened her eyes she didn’t see any roaring red flames Trixie groaned angrily at the smirking dragon that had apparently caught her. 

“You might be an annoying unicorn with an ego the size of a lake monster, but as long as I’m around I’ll make sure you don’t hit that ground too hard.” Whether it was a trick of the light, the blood rushing to the mare’s head from going up then suddenly coming down, or maybe just the embarrassment that came with being saved by a possible nemesis, Spike certainly couldn’t help noticing the red hue that began to dominate Trixie’s face. 

“S-shut up!” Trixie might have found the grin on Spike’s face less annoying than usual if not for the fact that she noticed something belonging to her placed upon his head for the second time that day. “And give Trixie her hat back.” 

“...Say please.”

“Hate you so much right now.”

“Tsk, tsk!” With a quick flick of his arms Spike flung the unicorn into the air, caught her, and positioned the mare in a way that made the watching ponies before them believe she was taking a dancing pose. “For my second trick I believe I’ll show my lovely assistant how to dance!” The watching ponies cheered, and whistled approvingly as they found watching the magician being placed at the butt of another's joke quite amusing.

“W-what?!” Before Trixie realized what was going on Spike twirled the mare in place, wrapped his tail around her waist and lifted her above his head. Finally finding herself Trixie kicked her legs about until she felt the tail drop her... back into Spike’s awaiting claws. Scowling at the dragon who grinned at her like a complete fool, Trixie hissed quietly enough so that only her ‘dance partner’ could hear her. “Trixie has had enough of your jokes, dragon! Now release her and continue to entertain this crowd ALONE!”

Stilling grinning at the glaring unicorn Spike tossed her into the air evoking a loud ‘Eeep!’ from the unwilling volunteer, and caught her again this time in one hand which gently fixed her into a dip that caused the watching stallions to whistle, the mares to swoon, and the young ‘uns to complain loudly to their parents about their eyes being blocked by censoring hoof. “But we’re doing such a good job as a team Trixie, surely you can share the limelight for the good of the fans.”

“Trixie works alone, brimstone breath! Now put me down and GIMME BACK THAT HAT!” With a growl Trixie wrapped her forelimbs around the neck of a very surprised Spike, and threw the both of them to the floor.

Quickly seeing where this was going Spike restrained Trixie with his tail, and carefully put a little distance between the two. “Only if you agree to work with me instead of scowling at me from the sidelines.”

“How about instead Trixie makes good on that promise to familiarize you with a new level of pain.” Missing hat aside the mare her lowered her horn toward the watching drake, and the smell of ozone began to permeate the stage.

Near the front of the crowd the Peculiar twin watched with approving grins, a large bag of popcorn between them, and surprisingly enough their cousin Tapioca Brain sitting beside them. As entrancing as the show turned out to be the worry-wort, and family instilled need to be a wet blanket caused the archduke to cast a worried glance toward his troublesome family.

“Perhaps we ought to call an end to this show you two, it’s beginning to look like those two might start wrecking the place.”

In response to their cousin’s cautious comment Quirk merely patted the stallion on the shoulder while Odd stuffed his face with popcorn.

“I’m serious you two! I know I let a lot of your shenanigans slide, but a dragon and a unicorn going at it in the center of town isn’t something that I’ll be able to write off as one of your pranks gone awry.” Tapioca Brian motioned for a few of his guards to assemble next to him as he put more and more thought into ending the performance while everything still remained in one piece.

Seeing that his brother was still happily munching away at his popcorn Quirk rolled his eye before draping his arm around his older family member. “Tapioca, trust me when I say this, but you really need to compose yourself; Odd and I have this completely under control.”

“That’s what you said before that incident with the baby manticore got out of hoof!”

“And we’ve apologized for that lapse in judgement time and time again, but worry not these two are professionals of their trade.” At that exact moment a small explosion from the stage sent forth a shockwave that bowled over Odd, Quirk, Tapioca Brian, and a third of the guard ponies.

“Hey watch it you mad mare! You could’ve blown me to bits with that last shot!” Grumbling at nearly being blasted into smithereens by a certain mare, Spike coughed up a few embers due to having to belch forth a quick torrent of emerald fire at the last minute. Though the resulting explosion had created quite the lightshow, and from the sound of the cheers proved to be visually entertaining for the audience, Spike wasn’t looking to repeat that last stunt.

“That was the idea you reptilian rube!” Without waiting another second Trixie was able to create a single blue tendril that wrapped around Spike’s legs and brought him to the ground with a loud thud. “Given how easily Trixie can beat you with a single thought, you should know better than to tick me off, Spike.”

“Hey that was a cheap shot, last time I checked you still couldn’t even win a game of chess without throwing a hissy fit, also color me surprised that you actually said my name.” A loud “ooh” emitted from the crowd as Spike glared up Trixie from across the stage.

“Is that so? Well then the Great and Powerful Trixie votes that we resume our previous competition...this time we have an unbiased audience.” While levitating her hat off of Spike’s head and back to her own Trixie turned toward the crowd and gestured toward the watching ponies. “How about it? Me and this sad excuse for a dragon will undergo a series of competitions, and you all shall be the judges of who wins.”

Back amongst the crowd Odd clapped his hooves loudly while cheering along with the rest of the audience. “Woooo!” Turning away from the stage Odd shared a smile with his twin, and looked toward Tapioca Brain with an all-knowing smirk. “See dear cousin, the conflict resolved itself and your subjects are further indebted to us for spicing up a rather dull celebration.”

Sighing loudly Tapioca Brain rubbed his temple with his hoof again casting a baleful glance toward his younger cousin. “Perhaps, but I’d be more appreciative if you didn’t have such a track record for spicing things up to the point of ruining the stew for everyone.”

Free of his restraint Spike stood beside Trixie who gave him a heated glare while keeping a hoof on her hat. “I’m game, though I must ask what should be our first competition?” 

All was quiet for a moment as the villagers mulled over a challenge worthy of such rare visitors, until a single voice broke the silence.

“Ah ain’t one to brag none, but ah’ve always found rock sculptin’ to be a good challenge.” In the back of the crowd a large grey stallion with a thick beard and a large mining pick on his back waved his front right hoof for Trixie and Spike to see. “Ah gots a few slabs of stone you can use if’n yer up for it.”

Spike raised an eyebrow and shot a challenging grin toward Trixie. “Sounds good to me. What do you think, oh great and powerful one?”

Snorting at the dragon’s taunt Trixie stomped her left hoof down, and looked Spike dead in the eye. “Trixie thinks that this will be an easy win.” And with that a loud cheer went out once again as the grey stallion and a few others quickly set to work moving two large cubes of rock the size of a teenage colt onto the stage.

“Here’s the rules. Ya’ll have five minutes to carve something, and after that we’ll vote on which one looks the best. Any questions?” 

Both Spike and Trixie shook their heads in reply neither needing any more guidelines than what was given, and after a countdown to three the duo quickly went to work. Trixie’s horn glowed intensely as the rock began to peel away much like a smaller rock she had worked her magic on earlier, while Spike breathed green fire onto his claws until they themselves glowed a fiery green, and he began swiping at the slab. The crowd let out multiple cheers, and sounds of awe from watching the competitors begin to turn two pieces of earth into possible art. Though as most of the village watched with rapt fascination, three spectators were deep in conversation.

“See that, not only is the crowd entertained, but now we have a few privileged ponies that are able to show off their wares while giving more fuel for this show.” Elbowing his nervous cousin from the side Quirk received a hoof bump from his twin who had joined in on trying to convince their noble cousin that everything was going smoothly.

“Perhaps you have a point, but still...”

“Still nothing, Tapioca! You really need to quit worrying so much cousin, all that self-induced stress is exactly what brought Uncle Tapioca into an early grave.” Joining in on the conversation Odd pranced past his twin, and cousin so that he could plop down and put his own arm around the now narrow eyed archduke.

“...That and partly due to that half-baked idea of yours that involved inviting a changeling to dinner.” 

“How were we supposed to know that she’d break your father’s heart, and feed on his emotions.”

A loud cheer went through the crowd as Spike was announced the winner, and Trixie could be heard loudly complaining about brown-nosing the judge with a carving in his image. After some debate through the crowd regarding the complaint, it was agreed that a near life-like statue of the judge was still preferential to what looked like an angry stump. To that Trixie proclaimed that the crowd was blind, and that it clearly looked like a monster that they had never, and would never see.

“One point for the dragon!”

“Uh, for the record you can all just call me Spike.”

“Duly noted! Onto the next competition... RIVER STOMP!”

Watching the two on stage even Tapioca had to whistle in appreciation, who’d have known that the mare was so quick on her hooves. “So uh... where’d you find these two anyways?”

Clapping at how expertly the dragon had landed after what appeared to be an impromptu backflip Quirk looked toward his brother with a grin before answering. “Strangely enough we stumbled upon them while brainstorming a way to bribe a river serpent into sharing his mustache fashion secrets with us.”

“Yeah! We took one turn and next thing we see is the two of them about to reenact some scene from a cliche romance novel.” Odd then proceeded to bump his two hooves together while making mock kissing sounds.

“Are they...?”

“You would think so the way they argue like some kind of married couple, but they keep saying no... plus the mare is sending me a few signals.” At this Odd sighed dreamily, while his brother merely shook his head with a chuckle.

“And the winner is...The Great and Powerful Trixie!”

A cacophony of mixed cheers and boos echoed from the crowd as the dragon pointed out that winking at the judge should be considered as attempting to garner favor. To this the judge along with a fair number of stallions shouted for the dragon to quit being a sore-loser, and to next time work with what he’s got. It should be stated that after the performance most of the mentioned stallions would soon get quite acquainted with their living room couches, while their wives, and girlfriends enjoyed a few nights of sleep without obnoxious snoring, or late night request to ‘cuddle’.

After some debate the next challenge to be chosen was the ancient, and honor-risking tradition... all you can eat key lime pie. For this competition a duo of giggling mares brought forth a large table that Spike and Trixie were to eat at, as well as a colt who pulled a cart of deluxe sized pie.

On the stage Trixie eyed the pie before her as she waited for the judge to announce the start time. She was hungry enough, but....casting a quick glance toward the dragon a cold chill ran down the unicorn’s spine as she watched the way Spike licked his lips.

Feeling watched Spike turned toward Trixie in time to see her sizing him up, though he wasn’t one to brag... often anyway, Spike allowed a wide grin to form on his face before he gave the mare a quick wink.

“I got ten pieces on the dragon!”

“I got forty pieces on Spike scarfing the whole dang table!”

“Enough betting! Commence consumption!”

To say that Spike wolfed down those pie would be an endearment to lupine creatures all across the globe, so rapidly did the unsuspecting pies cease their existence that the two mares from earlier had to chuck their creations into the beast’s maw instead of just placing them before his mouth in fear of being mistaken for a baked good. While the crowd cheered, and applauded the in the name of amazing dragon, and his apparent bottomless stomach one single mare watched with a look that was half appalled and half furious.

“That... dirty... cheating... where is he putting it all?!” Trixie had gotten to her third pie and already that tub-o-lard scaled menace was onto his twenty-fifth, worse yet she was starting to get a tummy ache. This was just like back in the forest, she would win fair and square and he’d resort to some underhanded dragon tactics and cheat for the remainder of the competition. “So unfair...”

“The dragon’s eating two pies at a time!” 

“...Completely... unfair.”

“Now he’s juggling the pie... and catching them with his mouth!”

“RIDICULOUSLY UNFAIR!” With an outburst that was half immature screech, and half bestial snarl Trixie slammed her hoof onto the table with enough force to cause the table to catapult Spike’s current victims in line into the air. The crowd, Spike, Trixie, the twins, and archduke Tapioca Brain watched as half a dozen pies soared into the air gracefully only to bombard with extreme prejudice the statue of Hibiscus Grove’s most honored hero.

A long silence overcame the entire village as Chancellor Puddinghead the hero that gave everything for her subjects, the mare that represented this village with a wisdom only seen once a few generations was pelted mercilessly with key lime pie. From his position on the stage Spike turned his head to count the number of faces that had gone from fascinated to pure disbelief. Trixie who visibly paled after seeing what she had done immediately set to work on pushing Spike off her stage and setting it back into it’s carriage form.

Slowly in unison the crowd of ponies began to turn toward the unicorn frantically running about her home, and the dragon currently picking himself off the ground.

Setting the walls back in place, and magically latching all the proper points Trixie galloped over to Spike and whispered hurriedly into his ears. “Trixie is willing to agree on a tie if you can have those harnesses on in ten seconds flat.”

From the youngest filly to the most decrepit stallion, faces set in expressions of appalled surprise began to give way to eyes filled with burning infernos, and looks of unrestrained anger.

Nodding his head Spike sprinted over to Quirk, and Odd the only ponies who looked more amused than furious. “Uhh, thanks for inviting us, we had a swell time and now it’s about time we continued on our way.” Shrieking in fright in response to a cream colored filly hissing at him like an angered cobra Spike quickly back-peddled until he loudly bumped into the side of the carriage.

From his position next to the chuckling twins Archduke Tapioca Javen Brain the 3rd slowly raised his hoof toward the dragon, and the carriage he had backed into. “...seize them...”

“Oh manure! Manuremanuremanuremanure!!” Spike placed the harness onto himself as fast as he possible could all the while keeping a frantic eye on the large crowd that had started making a sound akin to that of a hundred griffons growling in displeasure. “Uhhh Trixie...”

“Seize them!”

“What, Spike?!” Popping her head out of the usual window Trixie let out an audible squeal as she took notice of the pitchforks, and torches that began to sprout left and right within the villager’s ranks.

“SEIZE THEM!” At this the guards stormed forward their hooves sounding like thunder as their withdrawn sabers glinted with malicious intent between their teeth.

“Make sure to get our reward on the way out.” With that Spike bolted forward dragging the carriage with enough force to send Trixie flying back into the darkness of her carriage, a moment later the guards stomped the very place they stood into dust.

“IN THE NAME OF EARTH PONY KIND, SEIZE THE DEFILERS OF OUR GREAT AND BELOVED CHANCELLOR!” Eyes red and foaming at the mouth Tapioca Brain let out a blood curdling howl as he joined his subject in chasing the dragon driven wagon that raced up and down the streets of Hibiscus Grove. The only ponies still in place were the infamous Peculiar twins who once again shared a hoof bump.

“Best!”

“Jubilation Day!”

“EVER!”

Wiping lone tear that escaped his eye Quirk trembled with mirth as he turned to his equally amused twin. “It’s a good thing we found those two Odd, the lack of excitement was making me glum.”

Nodding his head in understanding Odd looked down toward his bag of popcorn, and pushed it toward his twin. “Well for now we’ve done our beloved village a favor, so here’s to you and me, chum.”

Hearing a noise Odd and Quirk turned to their left to see a familiar dragon pulling a familiar carriage while being chased by a few guards out for blood. As the cart passed the abandoned food stalls, a magical blue aura enveloped a few sacks of food and whisked them into a window that had opened up on the carriage’s right side.

As Spike raced by Quirk let out a small sigh his eye completely filled with envy. “Sometimes Odd I wish we weren’t so darn dedicated to injecting excitement into our village, seeing those two travel toward the unknown I can’t help but wish we could come.”

Hooves hitting the ground hard enough to cause the watching twins to vibrate the lead guard shouted out “Stop right there, criminal scum!”

Shrugging their shoulders in unison Quirk and Odd dusted themselves off, and excitedly began to make plans for their next scheme while hoping that the village would be much too obsessed with catching their latest guest to remember that the twins had set everything that transpired into motion to begin with.

On the other side of town Spike finally found a gate and wasted no time in dashing through it, and down the road. Wherever it lead the pair Spike certainly wasn’t going to complain as long as got them away from the hoard of righteously angry ponies. For a small while the only sound that was made was Spike’s feet pounding into the earth as he pulled the carriage as fast as he could intent on escaping any pursuers still intent on seeking revenge.

Ten minutes of panicked sprinting later:

“I think we can afford to slow down and let you catch your breath now.” Though her head remained within her wagon Trixie’s voice was unmistakable, and for once Spike had no qualms with agreeing with his companion.

He sighed in relief. “Things got a little dicey back there, didn’t they?” Nearly collapsing on the spot Spike wiped a scaled wrist across his brow, the sun was beginning to set, and he was happy for the slight cooling down in temperature.

“Indeed they did, Trixie would thank you if you refrained from any you told Trixie so’s, or yammering at her for causing that last part.”

Surprised by the unicorn’s unwillingness to start a fight Spike stretched out his limbs, and took a seat next to the carriage. “Deal! I think I’ve had enough excitement for one day, in fact I think I’ve had excitement for the rest of this whole journey.”

“...Agreed.” From within her carriage Trixie let out a small yawn and pondered whether or not she could allow herself some early rest. Within a few moments Trixie was curled up within the welcoming embrace of her bed, and just a few seconds from being fully asleep. As she slipped into the unconscious realm Trixie ironically wondered if this quest could get any more tiring.

Elsewhere:

Many miles away back at a familiar hole in the ground the leader of a large pack of diamond dogs followed one of his brothers down a narrow hallway which would lead to an exit two previous escapees had used. Grug had been roused from a well deserved nap by the frantic urgings of his youngest siblings, and was now rubbing the sleep from his yellow eyes while attempting to understand the reasoning behind his brother’s fear filled voice.

“Pugg. What is it that makes you scared like squirrel without a tree, and what makes Pugg want to disturb nap?”

In reply the diamond dog dubbed Pugg merely babbled, and whined fearfully while he attempted to pull his brother along faster and faster.

Finally after a few minutes Grug could see the exit that would take the two creatures out of their tunnels, and into the light of day, though from what Grug could see the sun was close to laying down for it’s own well deserved rest.

After pushing past his brother, and emerging into the outside world Grug growled as his nose picked up a scent he was less than happy to have around his home since the last incident.

“Grug would advise pony to leave in matter of seconds. Grug’s pack don’t like ponies.”

In response a small laugh slithered into Grug’s ears the tone was light and feminine, but for some reason Grug suddenly felt an incredible cold crawl down his spine. 

“Oh don’t worry your flea-bitten head poochy, I’ll be one my way after you answer a few questions for me.” Standing next to a large tree a sea-foam green pony with bright red eyes smiled brightly at the diamond dog alpha, stepping into the direct sunlight the pony looked to be a matured adult, as well as a unicorn.

Growling at the pony for not only insulting him, but for also being a troublesome unicorn, Grug’s eyes scanned the area for his guards that had been stationed at this entrance. A moment later Grug’s eyes went wide as he noticed the pile of bodies that laid off to the left, the scene caused Grug’s growl to turn to a snarl. “Begone horned pony! Grug has had enough of your kind.”

The unicorn let out another amused laugh a sound that reminded Grug of food that had gone unreasonably bitter in taste, and would cause most to empty their stomachs upon eating. “Is that so? Well I certainly hope you can be civil enough to tell me if you’ve seen something of mine.”

“Grug will answer no questions!” With another growl Grug took a threatening step toward the smiling pony, he had endured enough of the creepy cold that crept up his bones, as well as worried about his brothers who only looked to be barely breathing.

“What an ill trained dog you are... we’ll have to fix that, now won’t we?” 

Before Grug would reply his throat tightened to the point of causing him to yelp in surprise before he felt his body go weightless and rise into the air. Grasping in vain at the invisible force that held his neck Grug looked weakly down at the unicorn who had come close enough to touch his nose with her left hoof.

“Now we’re gonna do a little group activity, alright?” Although the amusement was still present in the unicorn’s voice it was now joined with a sliver of venom that further frightened Grug. “I’m gonna ask a few questions, you’re going to be a good dog and speak when I say speak... and he’s gonna break every bone in your body if you don’t.”

Grug’s eyes widened as a large stallion walked into view from behind the tree. Beneath the shade of the tree, Grug could only really make out what looked like a metal mask that covered the stallions face, though it did little to cover the dark violet eyes that stared up balefully at Grug, as well as the horn that glowed a deep miasmic purple.

“Now that you know the rules I’ll ask my questions.” Taking a moment to fix her forest green colored mane the mare looked up coyly at the choking diamond dog. “You see I’m looking for a little lost family member of mine, and a few things she stole from me. Would you happen to have seen her lately?”

End Of Chapter: