//------------------------------// // Ep4: Seleneicide // Story: Death by Dragon // by Compendium of Steve //------------------------------// Ep4 SELENEICIDE It’s two minutes later and I’m running up the entrance hall of Canterlot castle. Of all the times for a solar eclipse to happen. A lousy day made astronomically worse by an astronomical event, and an unscheduled one at that. This kind of stunt rips the facade of peace and harmony among the populace quicker than wet tissue paper. Sure, things are quiet for the first ten or twenty minutes, but then it breaks down into utter anarchy if there isn’t some bad guys making demands to quell the masses. And Canterlot is the last place you want to be when order breaks down. It didn’t take long before the whole attention of the city turned to the red-rimmed mass in the sky. The kid was included among the skygazers, which gave me a chance to end our heart-to-heart and skedaddle to the castle. You can call me cold for leaving a child alone during a crisis, but if he can hold his own in a major city for half an hour, I say he can handle things just fine. Besides, Twilight would expect me to get with Celestia to find out just what the hell is going on. No doubt her hooves are full calming the folks back in Ponyville. Dammit all, why today (or ever)? The guards were as stunned by the eclipse as everyone else, so I had no trouble running past them into the castle. Everything inside is darker than outside (real shocker), shadows covering the marble of the entrance hall as I ascend the stairs. It’s in the first hallway of the second floor that I finally notice something’s amiss: there’s nopony here. I stop myself and look around, listening. It’s even darker up here, and more disconcerting, it’s also dead silent. In a crisis like this, there should be all kinds of shouting and movement of bodies in this place, not to mention actual bodies. Something’s not right. As though on cue to that last thought, Discord drops in on some puppet strings to my right. He’s wearing some kind of red bondage get-up, keeping still and having one claw up to his lips as though shh-ing me. “Master Spike, we're in a tight spot. I mean, REALLY tight! Tighter than tight! Far tighter than royal unmentionables on certain royal flanks.” “I have no time for games, Discord. There’s something of a situation if you hadn’t noticed.” “Oh, I’m quite aware of it, Mr. Fussy.” He flips out of the strings, ditches the get-up and lands. “And before you start insinuating as you’re prone to do, this isn’t my doing. Far too quiet for one, and were it me, I’d just make the sun disappear completely. But that’s just me.” No time for pointless arguing. “Where is everyone?” Discord twists himself to look around, then rubs his beard. “A really good question. I would say they fled, but I’d imagine they’d use the front door, which I believe is how you came in. So I have to say they’re running about somewhere else in the castle.” Perhaps, but something still isn’t right. “What’s going on? Do you know?” He swings his body upward so that he’s lying on thin air. “To put it frankly, some dark evil force just appeared out of nowhere here in the castle. Creating mayhem, havoc and destruction, that sort of thing. Might also have something to do with that beautiful solar eclipse we’re having.” He whisks over to a window, where he stares out with some binoculars. “I dare say there hasn’t been an eclipse this menacing in ages. Certainly has that angry afterglow about it.” He drops the binoculars, revealing eyes that have shriveled into sizzling gooey globs. “What about Celestia, Luna: where are they?” Can’t get distracted now. “Celestia’s probably off overseeing an evacuation or rallying defensive measures or some nonsense. As for Luna... can’t quite say. Aaaanyway, ol’ fire flanks tasked me with investigating this dark presence that’s been floating around the place, but since I’ve bumped into you of all non-ponies, I think I’ll tag along as back-up.” I walk briskly past him. “I’ve no time for jokes, either.” Discord floats alongside me and talks in a faux hurt tone, which irks me more. I get enough of that from Sweetie Belle, and he’s nowhere as sexy. “You’d balk my genuine offer of assistance?” he pouts. “Me, the one individual who can make literally anything happen, who can provide the most invaluable help imaginable?” “How bout using that literalness in finding out what this thing is, like you’re supposed to.” “Oh, I can do that as well. Being Lord of Chaos gives me immeasurable multi-tasking skills. Also major ADD, but I’ve had centuries of practice to keep it in check. Besides, exactly what are you in such a hurry to get to? Your darling princess is about sixty miles that way.” Points off to behind me, but I keep walking. “Gonna find Celestia. Help out.” He still doesn’t take the hint as he floats to my right. “How noble and courageous of you. Say, you could look into this evil presence yourself while she’s preoccupied with protecting her subjects, get to the bottom of this nefarious attack, route the criminals and save the day. You know, the sort of thing you tell yourself you do all the time.” I break focus to look at him. “You said investigating was your job.” “And I also said that I can multi-task. I can watch your back while keeping an eye out for anything suspicious or sinister. Like that thing over there.” I stop in my tracks and look off slightly right, and sure enough, something sinister is there. Well, more wispy-looking than sinister, like a thin shadowy tendril, just lingering around a pillar. After I see it, the thing withdraws in a whsss, disappearing down the hall. Definitely suspicious, and a bit weird. “What was that?” “The evil presence, I’d imagine,” says Discord with head down, rubbing his chin in smarmy thought. “Though just the fringe from the look and feel of it. Can’t even be classified as a proper spook, though I’m sure the rest of it is running about somewhere further in.” His elbow rests on my head as he leans over. “See, I’m doing my work. And with your curiosity unquestionable enticed, don’t you just want to join me in hunting it down?” I’d tell him to shove off, but that thing (whatever it is) slinked off in the direction Celestia might be. The alternative is report back to Twilight. Who knows what that thing is, or exactly what it’s doing in here that it hasn’t already done outside. Although I can tell this darkness isn’t entirely natural, and it’s everywhere... Well, seems I don’t have a choice, then. I push off Discord’s bird elbow as I break into a run, calling back, “Until I find Celestia.” “That’s more like it!” he yells from way back. After some running I see something slip off down a side corridor, and against my better judgment, I follow. Discord’s elongated neck brings his face right up to mine. “You really shouldn’t be running so fast, Spike. Never know when you could run into something unpleasant.” “Nice tip, but I know precisely where I’m—” And I get immediately cut off by a halberd that nearly slices my snout off. I hop back and look at my assailant, only to find a surprise. The attacker is gold-plated, with a blue tuft thingy in the helmet. A castle guardpony. Two actually. Before I say something, I immediately notice what’s wrong. Their limbs, twisted about, are scarred with markings that glow pure blackness. Mouths are hanging open to let out unintelligible moans, all while looking at me with pale, vacant eyes. “Oh goodness, Spike! These fine guardponies seem to have been overtaken by the evil presence, and they’re out for your head!” Discord whimsically points out the obvious from over my shoulder. The possessed ponies shamble closer to me, and the one with the halberd, a pegasus, awkwardly pulls back to make another swing. “But what a conundrum: these fine upstanding ponies were just performing their duties, only to be corrupted for vile intent. They must be dealt with, surely, but can you really put them down? They would be your allies otherwise, yet they’re being made to see harm done unto you by another’s will. Would you dare slay these poor manipulated souls? Souls who have families, significant others that they love and support. Can you so willingly cut them down in the prime of their lives? To leave sweet children fatherless?” One swipe and two heads hit the floor, followed by two bodies. “You forget: I was the number one cause of orphans one year,” I say while twirling my blade to the side. “I didn’t forget, actually, but I’m glad you hadn’t either, haha! A very slow year for disease and famine that one was.” A pause. “Although, you could’ve asked me to restrain them.” “I’m more than capable of handling this.” Discord raises his “hands” defensively. “As you will.” I step over the corpses and resume my run. Can’t have sympathy for those that get in my way, especially given all the ponies I’ve down in. If it’s ponies I know or with whom I work with then it stings mildly, and that’s the extent of it. And really, pony blood spills the same as anything else’s. My footfalls are thunderous. The corners and alcoves by the windows grow darker with each yard covered, but nothing’s jumping out from them. Only silence that makes my running louder. Two turns later I’m at the hall that leads to the next set of stairs, and I bring myself to a stop. The darkness is thickest here; I can’t even make out the other side. Spines are picking up some kind of low humming. Not good. Cautiously I walk down the hall, sword raised. Very much doubt there’ll be spookhouse scares this time around, though you’d think there’d be a zombie hoard on the heels of the first two. But it’s mostly nothing. Nothing mixed with darkness. “A most eerie corridor if I do say,” Discord says from somewhere behind me. “It’s not so much of a fringe presence this time around.” “Yeah, I get that impression as well.” “I can move you over to those stairs if would like. Help ease your nerves a bit.” “Nerves are perfectly fine, so can it.” “Really, Spike, you just don’t know how good of a partner you have here, and you’re just tossing it out like yesterday’s tomatoes.” “I told you to shut—” Again I’m abruptly cut off, not by zombie guards, but the freakin’ architecture. A pillar swipes me up and wraps around me, polished marble tightening like sinewy muscle. It’s covered in the same dark markings that were on the guards, only now they’re seething black smoke. My left arm is free, but the stupid thing has my sword arm pressed against my body. The grip is too tight for me to bash with my claw (and it’s freakin’ stone, duh!). As I’m being moved through the air like a mouse in the snake’s hold, I take this moment to swallow my pride by calmly saying, “Hey, Discord, I could use some of that help you’re so keen on offering.” “What, for this? Come now, Spike, you totally got this. I’ll just be over there ‘canning’ it, as you instructed,” he says as he floats over to the side of the hall, his head popping into a can of nuts (oh, real clever). I’m a tad miffed by this, needless to say. “Well screw you then!” The pillar tightens more, making me wince from having my arm shoved into my ribs. The discomfort doesn’t last long, because it twists around and snaps back, unraveling to send me flying across the hall. Another pillar, the bottom half forming a spike, is ready to greet me. Normally, getting crushed and then flung wildly through the air would mean insta-kebab, but as Discord said: I got this. In a flash I twist midair and bring my sword through the pillar’s spike, making it flail about as I hit the ground untouched. The wounded pillar sets itself back into the ground, but another one next to it, plus two from across the hall, stretch out to impale me with their own sharpened bases. I hop back as the three of them punch into the floor, and quickly duck as one from behind swings around to knock my head off. I sprint forward, sidling through the embedded pillars and straight for the stairs. Don’t know how long their reach is, but I should get to the exit before it’s cut off. I sidestep one pillar’s strike, than another, and when one swings down at me from the front, I lop off part of it to show it better. Pausing after the attack isn’t such a hot idea, because the other pillars slam down in a tight circle around me, forming a cage of shadow-seared stone. I get to slicing an opening through the ones before me, but then a pillar seemingly from above snatches me and pulls up. Stupid me wasn’t paying attention, and now both my arms are caught in the marble snare. It’s steadily tightening its grip, looking to crush my ribs while squeezing the air from my lungs (guess it learned not to let go). Pressure increasing to the point I can’t keep my mouth shut, and I’m pretty sure I’m getting purple in the face (more so than usual). Obvious that things are getting desperate, and my options are practically zilch with Discord being the ass he normally is. An idea occurs; it’s a long shot, but it’s all I can think of. I start digging into one of my palms with my claws, get some punctures. I start flicking my palm up at the underside of the pillar once I feel some dampness, then I start building some internal flames with whatever air I got left. Should be able to make a spark, but I’m gonna need enough to get over the pillar, and gotta aim it right, too. With enough heat built up, I force my head down and let out green fire onto the pillar. However, the moment the flames make contact, a deep shriek emits and next thing I know the pillar has let go. I hit the stone flooring on my knees (freakin’ ouch), hunching over in a breathless daze as my shades fall off and clatter on the ground. There’s some more of that dry whisping noise, and when I look up, I find the stairs right in front of me, and everything being significantly less dark. Drawing some much needed air, I look around and see that the pillars are back in their usual, inanimate positions. Some of them are missing chunks, but the black markings are gone. Whatever attacked me just up and fled, just from getting a bit scorched? Lame, I’d have to say, especially after scratching up my palm for nothing. It could’ve had me, too. Once I get my lungs and ribs to stop aching, I reach over to pick up my shades (normally never fall off. An omen?), then get myself back on my feet. “Ah, see? You took care of that all on your own. You honestly didn’t need my help whatsoever,” Discord says from some corner as I put my shades back on. “Yeah, no sweat. Though, feel free to intervene next time.” I begin walking toward the stairs, and he hovers alongside. “Okay, I’ll keep that in mind. But isn’t this more exciting than helping out with a boring evacuation or running home to dear Princess Twilight?” “Yeah, it’s a real blast.” At the foot of the staircase I start running up, two steps at a time. Dark magic or energy or whatever that can control architecture, living things, and very likely can take over furniture as well. Just a whole heap of trouble, but at least I got something I can exploit if it gets too hairy. Up the first set, turn around and get to running up the next. More darkness on the third floor, but it’s the natural kind. Where could that poltergeist have run off to? “Vanguard!” I stop shortly past the landing, and look ahead to see three guardponies standing before a large set of double doors, the entrance to one of the upper meeting rooms. They aren’t bearing markings from what I can make out, and they don’t seem to be shambling around. One of them, probably the one who called, is waving at me. Fairly lean, well-toned pegasus mare. “Over here!” Good to see not everything has gone to the dark side (heh). Seems Discord buggered off somewhere as well, so that’s also something of a relief. I resume walking and call back, “What’s the situation?” “We’re searching for any staff that haven’t been evacuated. We could use some extra help.” “Hey, have any idea what this attacker is?” asks a unicorn with a spear. “I only know it’s dark, nasty, and unidentifiable,” I reply. “So a demonic ghost, right? I knew it,” Mr. Surly Unicorn mutters. His companion seems in more hopeful, though cautious, spirits. “I don’t think there’s much more to round up,” she says. “We should be alright if we move fast and—” Her voice breaks into a yell as a thick cloud of howling darkness slams onto the three, pulling them into the air and shaking them about as black vapor enwraps them. The other two try to yell but the vapor shoves its way into their throats and pulls them into the indiscernible mass. It’s prey consumed, the cloud blows a hole through the double doors and flies on through. Wreck up the place only to give me the slip, eh? Not for long, you bastard (agh, Discord! Now I’m riled up). I dash ahead, through the broken door and into the meeting hall. Complete disaster zone, with papers and furniture strewn all other the place. Walls and tapestry scratched and torn. There are a few bodies included in the mess, bent in unnatural shapes, stricken by horror everlasting on their faces. None are reanimating, at least. A scream from nearby turns my head to one of the side doors, and I hoof it over there. Past the unhinged door I enter a side sitting room, with maps and folios all over the place, and I’m in time to catch the shadowy mass make a getaway through another door, this time with a passenger. Hopping over an overturned table I race out in pursuit and run into another hall, all checker-tiled this time around. Snapping my gaze left I see the menace blocking out the rest of the hall with its seething, shapeless bulk. Not completely shapeless, because held within its tendrils is a screaming dark-lemon yellow maid, waving her limbs in my direction. “Help Me! HELP MEEEE!!” The shadow blob shifts as though spotting me, then pulls back and glides in the opposite direction. I break into a run, holding my sword out to the side. It takes a sharp right into an adjacent hall, and I claw the ground to make my turn extra sharp and quick. Windows to the left, wall of paintings to the right, all blur past at breakneck speed. The shadow blob seems to take notice of my pursuit and lifts up the terrified maid before flinging her down at me. I sidestep as the screaming maid hits the ground with a sickening crunch that cuts off the screams. Brutal way to go, poor dame. Can’t be slowed down by somber thoughts, though. Can’t shake me that easily! Having failed to smash me with the pony, the blob flattens then shoots up into the ceiling, only for it to blast through the windows to my side in a thunderous roar. My arms go up to deflect the glass shards, but I don’t lose speed. The shadow reforms into its previous bulky shape and gains speed, turning left further ahead. I follow, and just as quickly turn right as I catch the blob having done the same, entering another pillar-lined inner corridor. The blob shoots out some tendrils to knock over pillars to block my path, but I hop, slide, and cut my way through these lazy obstacles. Turning down another corridor I find the entire place crumbling in mid-collapse (stepping up your game I see!). I dip into the sinking floor, but hop off the falling tile, bounce off a pillar, swing off a chandelier, and roundhouse kick a flower stand away before landing in a crouch on the other side. I get up and look back, seeing the wide view of the eclipsed landscape and the long mountainside drop where the corridor used to be. Heh, that’s more like it. I get back to running, and just as I turn into another hall, the wind is choked out of me as a shadow tendril gets my neck and pulls me over dozens of yards in seconds. At the end of the ride I’m held dangling over the fat shadow mass, which makes a low, otherworldly growl. I don’t give it time to growl further as I cut its tendril off, making its bulk writhe as I get back on the ground. While it’s quivering from getting a taste of sword asskickery, I deliver the main course by leaping up and slamming my blade into its puffy, velvety center. “Not so menacing with a sword stuck in ya, huh?” In response, the blob starts shaking rapidly before exploding, throwing me back a good ten yards onto my back. I push myself back up with a slight backache (Joe just had to go and soften me up earlier), but what I see in front of me doesn’t really help ease my discomfort. Ponies, about two dozen of them, all shambling, groaning husks scarred by the shadow’s mark. You wanted a zombie hoard, and here it is. Giddy gumdrops all-around, genius. “About time I caught up with you,” comes the voice of Discord to my stalwart side. “Did you see the mess left back there? This guy means business, I’m pretty sure of it.” A pause as he looks at the hoard (not sure if he does. I just can’t stop staring at this bull crap). “Oh, it sure got crowded in here in a hurry. The rest of the evacuees I presume?” Maybe. A bunch of guards, but also maids, cooks, assorted servants, all with blank eyes and hanging tongues. At the other side of this mindless assembly is the somewhat slimmer shadow mass, which slips off down the hall. I grit my teeth and twirl my sword around before assuming a charge stance. “Just more crap to deal with.” I run ahead and get to work. Shove aside about as much of them as I can, then start kicking and cutting out the legs of those in front of me. The commotion causes them to close in, but I use my tail to smack the ones behind me to get some breathing room. A unicorn dressed as a waiter manages to fall onto me, looking to stab me in the face with his horn. I deny him that by falling back and throwing him to his friends behind. Bit of a mistake there, as four of them surround me and try to pony-pile me while I’m getting up. They manage to succeed, but what’s four average servant ponies to a pair of tight, honed, naturally superior dragon legs? They go flying, and I spring back on my feet before anyone else gets the same idea. Now it’s three guardponies, and they look a bit more sturdy than the others, but luckily they’re just as dumb. Grab the head of the center one, smash it into the one on the left, and I have an opening that I leap through to escape the crowd. I run a ways to the other end of the hall, leaving those unfortunate and annoying souls behind. Seems I can catch my breath, but such desire is made for naught upon rounding the next corner and stumbling upon another hoard. Actually, not so much a hoard as a shuffling, groaning carpet (fancy way of saying there’s far more than two dozen this time around). “Really?” “Hey, Spike!” I immediately look up to see a cage inexplicably hanging from a rope. Or rather, a cage that seems to be made of various animal parts for bars, with two big yellow eyes gawking down at me. “Cut me loose!” I mentally shrug before dashing into the hoard. Hop over the first line of possessed, land on the back of one further in and spring up to the side of the fleshy cage. I grab on and pull myself up, severing the rope in one motion and bringing the two of us down. The cage clatters in the midst of the hoard, trapping a good number of them and giving me a resting place among the shambling legion. What a mess... “I could have teleported you back there,” says Discord, his mouth making up the bar next to my foot. “But you just had to charge in like the battle maniac that you are. Also, it’s rather odd for me of all ponies to tell you that there are nonlethal ways of handling this.” “Then you handle them.” I back up to the other end of the cage. “I’ve got bigger fish to fry.” I use the extra running space and leap off the edge, clear the rest of the hoard and roll onto empty floor space. “Give it one-for in that case!” Nice to know he can be moderately helpful. I resume the chase before he has a chance to make me regret thinking that, and I reach a set of double doors set into the side of the hall, slightly ajar. I smell its dark scent; getting sloppy there, bud. I hurry over to the doors, but stop and press along them to the crack leading inward, then quickly duck inside. Thick, unnatural darkness everywhere; can barely make out the pillars to the sides of the room, and the ceiling is an endless void of black. So consuming, not even the paltry light from the hall registers. Dead silent as well. Guess it’s hide and seek, now. My feet move cautiously forward as I hold my sword before me. Barely a sound with each footfall, though I feel the intense cold of the floor. Don’t see anything, but I can sense something’s moving about. Very slightly, but can’t pinpoint where. Then it occurs to me that the darkness itself feels alive, and that I've walked through something similar many years ago, in a wholly different landscape. Only this stuff isn't being very social. Hate this sort of inconsistency: be loud and destructive one minute, than eerily invisible the next. Like the thing’s bipolar. Several more silent steps, still nothing. Seemingly no end to this particular room (no clue where I am in the castle, for that matter). Suddenly there’s a tap from behind, and I swing around with sword raised. Nothing. Before I can lower my sword, something hits my shoulder. I glance over, then reach a claw to it and feel something moist. Some black slimy substance are between my claws when I look it over. Kinda like... I immediately look up, and find something looking right down at me from the void. Piercing white eyes, and a massive set of razor jaws, salivating and letting out a hungry hiss. “Ah hell no.” Leap and roll out before the face falls down as a ton of shadowy sludge, and getting back on my feet, I turn to see the oily puddle arise into the shape of a cloudy, serpentine-like shadow beast. Pointed ears jut out as the piercing eyes and teeth reappear in the “head”, which allow it to make a screeching roar as its base spreads out into several tentacles (hoo boy). I only grin and straighten up while twirling my sword. “Okay tall, dark and vicious.” Battle Stance assumed. “Let’s rumble.” I don’t give it the chance to whip out those tentacles, charging straight for its heart. My blade swings to split it open, but the beastie sinks into the floor and reforms several feet to the right in a blink, making me slice empty air. The beast takes its turn by sending all its razor-tipped tentacles to stab me, but a hop back and they only stab solid ground. Swipe of the sword cuts through the line of them, making them evaporate and suck back into their host, only to reappear intact. Instead of having another go with the tentacles, the thing opts to bite me in half. I step around three attempts of razor-sharp snapping and try to cut the back of its neck, but a groove forms to let my blade pass before closing up again. It pulls back and I take the opportunity to hack away at it while it settles, but I get the same result of it splitting in places to avoid damage (what the freak?). Something like a broken cackle comes out of its throat, seemingly in amusement over its self-preservation tactics, and before I try a plain stab it shoots off to the side of the room. The creature zips and darts around the various pillars at high-speed, making it hard for me to follow. I manage to catch sight of its face screaming right at me, giving me cause to leap away from its full body(?) charge. I immediately backstep as it does the same charge in front of me. Stumble about a bit, and that seems to be its intent because it comes right at me again. I have other plans though, specifically a midair cartwheel that gets me over the shadow snake and lets me split its ugly face at the same time. The beast ditches the pillars and rushes to the other end of the room, coiling back into its previous shape and eyeing me menacing with an unscratched look (did I miss?). The tentacles pierce through the floor before it, and there’s a shaking and rumbling as cracks appear in the masonry before a whole section of the floor is pulled up.The flooring is raised over its demented, smiling head, but my eyes turn from the chunk of marble to the red scaly tail dangling over me. I look back at the shadow beast as it pulls back its tentacles, then jump up and grab onto the hooked tail. The tail pulls up as the section of floor goes flying underneath a second later, inches from my toes. I’m pulled higher until I’m brought face to face with Discord, who’s detached his tail to make a scaly fishing pole and reel. He’s even wearing a fishing vest and hat, touched up with different lures (really gets the details down with his randomness). “Oooh, not quite the whopper I had expected,” he comments, leaning against thin air. “Hey, guess what: I took care of those bothersome ponies from earlier! I was conflicted over how to deal with them: lock them up; tie them to balloons; make gerbils out of ‘em. Finally decided on making them dance in the courtyard while this calamity gets resolved. Oh man, you really should see how they shuffle! Barely any choreography required; it’s as though they’re predisposed to bust a groove by nature. Zombie-esque groove, sure, but nevertheless impressive.” I eye the shadow beast, who in turn is eyeing me with an dark, impatient look. I look back to my angler. “Real nice, but mind giving me a lift back down?” “Catch and release, then? Alrighty.” He pulls back his tail pole. “And away you GO!” Flings it forward, the momentum hurling me right down at the shadow beast’s face. I prime my sword for impalement, but a foot from impact two tentacles collide into me in a halting embrace. Finding myself incapacitated by evil forces a third time, the shadow beast lowers me close to check me out with a single enlarged eye. Afterwards, it moves back with a look of sinister content, then opens up its jaws like a dumpster for some delectable spiffy-ass dragon. Remember how I mentioned a weakness earlier? Time to get exploitin’. I suck in a mouthful of air and let out a fierce stream of fire down the would-be glutton’s throat. Can’t make out its face from this angle, but it’s screaming and shaking and quivering violently, letting out a mixture of hateful yell and debilitating cough as though choking (too hot for ya, ugly?). It controls itself and slams its mouth shut into a toothy grimace, eyeing me with hate so concentrated I might’ve caught fire if I weren’t naturally retardant (insert laugh here). I only grin in the face of its raw malice. “Lost your appetite already?” It lets off a screeching roar before tossing me across the length of the room. Through the air on a collision course with pain, only I collide with something soft and lumpy rather than hard and stony. Hitting the floor, I get up and find that some worn-down brown bean bag had been placed where my sorry back was to smash against the wall. A look to the side reveals the perpetrator, leaning out from behind a pillar and giving me a goofy thumbs up with his lion paw. “Told you I got your back.” Discord throws in a wink, but I just turn back to the enraged shadow beast and charge to make up lost ground. The beast fires out its tentacles like a wave of arrows as I rush forward. I sidestep the first four, but as they get closer I spit hot flame and send them reeling back to their master. Rather than send out more tentacles, Sir Shadow Beastie pulls out some columns and throws them my way. Hop over one and powerslide beneath the one after, and I’m right up to the nightmare serpent. I swing my blade upward and let out a long stream of fire, hopefully leave the brute with a scar for its trouble. Predictably it relocates as a puddle in a screaming fit (don’t know if I left a mark), and in its place a dozen tentacles shoot up to slam down on me. I slice them apart, but as my swing finishes I catch a chunk of pillar careening toward me. No moment to spare, I breath in and spit a fireball to blow it apart. Turns out not to be entirely wise as I cough a bit from the stinging in my throat. “-Kufg- -kwuh-, ah damn, -kuh Kuh!-” Though I usually do bursts or streams with my fire, I can make fireballs. But there’s a higher degree of heat whenever it’s done, so it can hurt if my throat hasn’t done it much for a while. A bit sloppy getting out of practice on that sort of thing, yeah, but as you have undoubtedly noticed, I don’t use my dragon fire when I fight... unless my sword’s involved. It’s just not sophisticated enough for my tastes. Plus, would be a detriment if the place I was fighting in was on fire as well. Once I finish hacking like an idiot, I look forward to see shadow beast glaring at me (oh hey, I did manage to leave a mark). It gnashes its teeth at me in some sort of fidgety annoyance, then stops to stretch out its tentacles before plunging them into the scar I made. It shudders while gritting its teeth to the point of screeching, then bends back as its tentacles yank out ten shadow-marked ponies from its core. The beast brings its head back to deliver a mad demonic snicker before flinging the possessed servants at me. They all tumble over the floor toward me. Some of them stay prone, but most slowly get up on their hooves to shamble over. As I’m about to make a remark to belittle its unoriginality, it shoves its tentacles back in and pulls out more ponies, tossing them while going back for more. There’s a deranged shrieking as it showers zombie ponies all over the floor. I duck and knock aside the few that make it over to me, but now a swarm of them are within awkward groping distance. I instantly cut down the first row, but in a surprise burst of shuffling, the row behind leaps over to knock me to the floor. I spout out a gush of flame in frustration, backing them up enough so I can start kicking and punching whatever jaw is slow enough to still be over me. I spring back onto my feet, clock the first caretaker in my way, and grabbing his foreleg I swing his sorry flank around, knocking down maids, cooks, and guards alike before throwing him through the hoard toward the room entrance. I hop over the fallen minions, and once back on empty floor I spin around and behold the dense herd of the damned. Yeah, screw this; I’ve wasted enough time fighting them on a level playing field. Time to make an opening. I bring up my sword and cut open my left palm (still a bit tender from earlier). As I finish up coating the blade, “Hmm, quite the clutter. Let me get that for you.” A boulder-sized lion paw pops in from the side and flicks the hoard with enough force to bust out the other side of the room, launching ponies outside (into a long drop). The lion paw gives a massive okay sign before retracting. “Alright, take the shot!” Only a few zombie stragglers, and the shadow beast looking around trying to figure out what the hell happened. I take its moment of confusion to finish up the coating, spin, fire, chant, and let off a Jade Slider once I’m back around. The attack shreds through two ponies in its path before hitting the shadow beast, whereupon the left side gets blown off in a loud blast made louder by an ear-splitting shriek of pain and rage. I plug my ears as any untouched glass blows out, and the remaining possessed servants hit the ground, unconscious (or dead). Now half the monstrosity it was, the beastie swaggers and pants out a growl while giving me a death glare, then immediately turns tail and flies out the back. Another chase? So be it! I rush toward the back, through a set of previously blocked double doors and into another hallway. I brake long enough to spot the wounded shadow to my left and kick it into overdrive. Columns and windows whizz past me as I keep my eyes solely on my fleeing prize. No pillars or furniture are coming my way; guess I really did a number on it. It slips down a side path, and getting there I find it leads to a set of stairs. I’m able to leap up over fifteen steps, hit the wall with my feet, run and then spring over the next set and onto the next floor without losing momentum. Jeez this son of a bitch actually has me pumped to kill it. The head of the beast glances back, then puts on the turbo and gains a few dozen yards before whipping around a corner. Closing in on the corner, Discord pops into existence in the form of a shabby springboard. “All aboard for the finisher,” he says while waving me over with his talon. Hells to the yeah. I leap the remaining ten yards and crouch land onto the board. “Bon voyage!” Discord gives off a sproing and I’m soaring down the hall at tear-whipping speed. It’s seconds by the time I get up to the beast, and holding out my sword, I plunge the tip at the tail end and let momentum tear it along through its backside. Another screech goes off as I flip and land hard in a sliding crouch, leaving a smoke and dust trail as I twirl myself around to a stop. We’re at the end of the hall in what I suppose is an external gallery. There’s paintings on the wall, a fancy crystal chandelier and a set of glass doors that lead out to a darkened balcony. My quarry, I assume, had tumbled over itself from my attack and is pulling itself together. Has more of a serpentine look to it, being slimmer, longer, and more vicious and desperate looking. Its elongated body seems more hunched, and its doing a lazy job keeping its snarling face looking at me straight. I twirl my sword and beckon him with my claw. It raises itself up slightly and hisses. That seemed to have done the trick. I bring up my sword and brace for his attack, but then something catches my eye that breaks my focus entirely: a blotch wandering around by the hall exit, behind the beastie. Something small, brown with white feathers, with an orange cap and looking very scared and out of place. Gravely out of place. “Kid, what the hell are you doing here?!” He turns and spots me, panic and relief shaking his beak as he spoke. “I-I-I don’t know! I was looking for mom then things got really dark and I—” The beast’s head swings back to gaze upon the blubbering griffon. Celestia dammit! “Run!” Too late. There’s a screech before the beast shoots back, wrapping around the now-screaming kid and shooting off to the balcony. Glass doors shatter as it launches out, growing leathery wings and taking flight into the dark sky beyond. I only stand there, breathe in and sigh. I can lose myself in the thrill of battle at times, but I can’t go losing my head when a shadowy hell beast flies off with an innocent twerp I just met earlier. It won’t stay that way for long, anyway. I bring my palm up to my blade as I give myself a running start. Half the room’s length is covered by the time I start my chant and get a good fire going. A yard from the balcony opening I slam a Malachite Piston into the ground and blast off through the opening and out of the castle. High altitude cold whips at me as I fly through the air in an arch. I angle myself as I begin to drop. Amid the darknened green of the ground far below I pinpoint my target and adjust accordingly. It’s just flying in a straight line; idiot won’t see this coming. Blade outstretched, trained, and with a thrust I stick it hard into the “bone” of the wing as I land on the beast’s back. It cries in pain and surprise, rocking from its sudden loss of wing control. The sword serves as an anchor for this ride, and with altitude rapidly dropping I lean over the side and dig into the beast’s side with my free claw. A few scrapes of shadow substance and a white-feathered head pops out gasping for breath, to which I stick my claw into his face. “Hurry and climb up already!” I yell over the wind. The kid pulls his talons out from the murk and grabs onto my arm. I pull back hard until he’s free of the monster’s grasp, and he climbs up onto my shoulders for good measure. At this time I’m keeping steady on our wounded flyer, who has entered a careening nose dive toward the plains below. I bend my knees in preparation, get the timing right. Once the moment arrives I pull out my blade and hop off the shadow beast with kid in tow. Just a comfortable (if fast) ten foot drop gets us back on solid ground, though the sound of a rough, hard impact close by indicates the beast’s landing was anything but. Kid’s talons are digging into my shoulders (eased up slightly since landing, though), and I feel him shifting around, no doubt getting used to escaping being a living nightmare’s lunch. There’s miles of flat plains around us. Canterlot and its mountain are far in the distance, and the edge of Everfree can be seen in the opposite direction. The color of the grass is muddled dark and tinged red, courtesy of the solar eclipse that’s hanging high above like a flaming tumor. I lower my gaze on the dark heap lying at the end of a trench ten yards long. A clawed limb appears and hits the ground, followed by another that pushes up the fallen beast. It rises up into a four-legged form, a thick build with only the head retaining some semblance of its earlier serpentine look. It turns, flicking a smokey tail, and faces me with those two piercing eyes again. This slimmer fiend just looks at me and the kid as a light breeze blows around us. It then lifts up the wing I had stabbed, revealing a gaping tear. “Guess it’s back to being grounded for the both of us, huh?” The fiend glares at me, then looking to its ruined wing, dark particles lift off its body and spread over the tear, melding until its whole and unscathed. It gives the restored wing a flap before looking at me. “Well that’s fair.” It retracts its wing, then plants its limbs apart and lowers its head. I hold out my arm and shake it; the kid takes the hint and climbs down onto the ground silently. “Stay here.” Free of my passenger, I flex my shoulders and neck and start walking toward my waiting opponent. “Right, let’s pick up where we le—” A tendril shoots out from the fiend and pierces through my left shoulder, forcing me to end that sentence with a “Hurk!” The speed and force of the blow knocks me off my feet and bouncing over the ground. Bounce past the kid and flop to a halt, coughing to get some air back in me. Shoulder’s a mix of numb and stiff. “Spike!” the kid yells. “I’m alright.” Not. “Just had the wind—” I’m interrupted when something wraps around my leg, then pulls me along the ground and into the air upside down. There’s just enough time to discern it’s another tendril that’s got me before I’m slammed into the dirt. Repeatedly. I lose the grip on my sword after the first few slams, and the sheath flies off shortly after as I'm continually acquainted with the ground like a ragdoll in a construction zone. Lose count after ten slams, but at some point the grip on my leg loosens and I’m going through the air again. Another jarring tumble and I’m flat on my face. Manage to get my head up before it spins to reorient itself with the horizontal plane. I’m blinking out the stars in my vision when the kid comes over. “Kid, get outta here, now,” I sputter weakly through the dirt and blood in my mouth. “B-but your back, it’s all bloody.” From a million miles away comes a grand whinny screech, along with the sound of expelling gas. I force my right arm up to push the kid away. “I said go!” He hesitates; I can see the fear, concern and indecision toppling over each other in his eyes. Things start getting darker before he looks up and flees. I start rolling myself onto my back as a black misty veil flows overhead. Things go completely dark except for the eclipse, which burns a fierce white ring in the black canvas above. My eyes can’t even see the ground; I can barely see myself. The same living darkness from earlier. Trapped in the belly of the beast, and not in the best shape for it either. I will myself back onto my feet, and after sorely standing up, I notice the noise. Low but heavy, like breathing. The breath of some omnipotent observer. Bad juju a-brewing. I have to get out of this place. I stumble forward with my right arm outstretched, but the darkness is so thick my claw disappears just three feet from me. Amidst my confusion and agitation, I recall my earlier strategy and take in a deep breath. Green flame fills the air before me, revealing my wayward arm, as well as the look of the shadow fiend charging at me. I’m too slow to react and I take a wing to the face, knocking me onto my back. Once more I pull myself up, but I manage to get into kneeling position when an unseen blow smacks my back and sends me onto my face. My left shoulder hits the ground as well, bringing a sharp stab of pain which, for what it’s worth, puts some feeling back into my left arm. Push myself up, a bit more weary this time. As I hold my arm out to steady myself, I touch something thin and cold. Grasping it further upward, I eventually fill the hilt of my sword sticking up in front of me. Some relief there, but then I see hovering ahead of me those piercing white peepers. There’s a low growling, but nothing more. It’s toying with me. Getting harassed these past ten, fifteen minutes and now it has its tormentor blind and bloodied. Powerful, fast, but just a creature of spite. Well, I’m done playing too. This is where it gets serious, pal. But first, attack the darkness. I use my sword as support to get back up, and once erect, I calmly take off my shades, put them in my suit jacket, and then undress. I do a lousy fold of the jacket before I put it on the ground by my feet, then I pull out my sword with my good arm. I force my left arm to roll up the sleeve of my shirt, and once done, I flex a claw and dig it into the underside of my arm until I feel it give. Down the length it goes, stinging all the way to the wrist. I tighten my grip to get a good flow going, then bring my sword up to my snout. I whisper a chant and give off some flame. “Emerald Lancer.” Flick out my arm and the sword ignites. The flaming steel’s brightness pushes back the darkness until the shadow fiend is revealed in its entirety. We simply look at one another, the fiend mindlessly scraping one of its limbs into the ground. My sword might have a wicked awesome look now, but it has to have a steady flow to keep going, and it burns blood pretty fast. This must end fast. The fiend charges, and I shamble myself into a run as well. As we approach, I swing my flaming blade upward, catching my foe in the side as it veers to dodge. It goes from dodging to attacking by swinging its head at me, but I whip my sword around and smack it back while burning a part of its face. It cries and retreats, but turns back around and scrapes its limb again in preparation for another charge. It bears down on me, but as I swing to strike, it leaps over me in a single bound, and I manage to turn my gaze back to see it land and charge at my exposed backside. I have no choice but the take the full brunt of it. Feel the tear of my shirt as I lose touch with the ground, but slam my feet back down and keep myself from falling over. Turn back to see it growling, and I do a charge of my own. It fires a tendril at me, but I duck and rise up to sever it in a green slice. The fiend flinches, and I use that opening to rush in further and cut off the tendril at its base. The fiend cries again and leaps back with a flap of its wings, then flaps up into the air before flying at me in a dive tackle. I swing my sword around, which freaks it out into a last second wing flap and adjustment. As it’s flying low I swing again and catch one of its back legs, causing another cry. The creature lands but stumbles on its cut leg. It quickly regains its stance and gives a low roar. More tendrils are launched, and more still get chopped down. I got caught off-guard earlier, but I’ve adjusted my movements and swipes to match their speed. The fiend growls and shudders angrily from the burns before firing a whole wall of tendrils. They all go down in a swipe, but the fiend pounces from behind them and plants its limbs on me, forcing me onto the ground (third or fourth time this happened?). Pinning me down, the fiend opens its pearly fangs to eat my face off. A reflex fireburst scorches the inside of its mouth, making it leap back and stumble in wailing agony. I push myself up and charge at my stricken foe. It silences as I’m within a yard of it, then spreads a wing in front of it as I slice. The wing splits in two and the fiend screeches before leaping back. From its new spot, the fiend merely stands and takes some heavy breaths. Its mouth is a jagged burnt tear, and I don’t see it nor the wing reforming. Seems I’ve got it worn down. My vision blurs and head tilts as a bout of dizziness blindsides me. Time’s nearly out. Gotta see to it that it’s his. I charge at it and get to swinging. It ducks and weaves, bringing up a warding tendril when my blade gets too close to its devastated face. It doesn’t dodge too well, though, as I manage to score a few cuts on its face and chest, just adding to its new raggedy look. It brings up a wing and tries to bat me away, and as I step back to avoid getting smacked in the face, the fiend lunges. I only have enough time to bring my claws down on its head to hold it back from going for my jugular. We hold this stance, waiting for one of us to slip up. Then in an instant, I spot something wooshing from behind the fiend and a tendril slaps my sword from my claw. The fire it carried extinguishes instantly, and in that brief confusing moment the fiend headbutts my chin and sends me back on the ground. Pure supernatural darkness again. I have no idea where the fiend is, but doubtless I’ll find it soon enough when it tears my neck out. No choice but to stumble around and find my sword. The steady blood loss is making my footsteps heavy, and a bit disoriented. I start to hear breathing from the fabric of the shroud, but then my left foot steps on something solid, rounded. The sword sheath that flew off earlier. The breathing gets closer, and I have one last ditch thought. Galloping sounds join the breathing as I slide my toes under and kick up the sheath. My left claw snatches midair, and quickly I rub my other palm along the wood and metal casing. As something roars by my ear I whip around and set fire to the sheath. The impromptu torch hits the charging shadow fiend in the cheek, and before it can look at me I give it another flaming smack, and then another and another. In the low light I see it stagger around in a daze. Immediately I bring up my still-bloody palm, spit fire into it, and deliver a flaming claw over its chest. Shadowy flesh flies freely as the beast hollars extra loud and hurt. It falls back a ways, but stops and groans. At the edge of the light field I see the fiend shake before erupting into a cloud of dark mist. The darkness eases up significantly, to the point where I can see the ground. As the fiend continues letting off gas, I spot my sword some ways from the left of it and run for it. I pick it up upon arrival (waving out the sheath so it doesn’t disintegrate), but as I’m readying a Jade Slider, I turn and notice the gas cloud dissipating and something stepping out of it. A frame tall and elegant. A coat so richly black it’s practically blue. It only makes sense that something like this would have her involved somehow. “Your Highness,” I say in an even tone. “What? Who is thou? Where... Whom...” The princess is a total mess: haggard, bedraggled, any adjective for being wrecked. Her breaths are ragged, and her wings have feathers sticking out of place. Her alicorn stature is reduced by how low she’s keeping her head, yet she keeps looking at me with dim eyes that have some minute spark lingering within. The worst aspect of her appearance are the patches of shadow mist flowing off of her like steam. It seeps out of the corners of her muzzle like smoke. I lower my weapons. “Are you alright, Your Highness?” She shifts her head about confusedly, the pupils in her eyes zipping around her sockets. “Alright? No, nothing alright. Giving way, endless treachery. No trust, trust none. Leave, all.” She just rambles on in mumbling, broken speech laced with fear. “What’s wrong?” “It hurts... The rays, it hurts so much—Darkness! Darkness is the natural order. Light is a wandering dream—why do they abandon me? All liars, two-faced sycophants. Still take for granted! Who loves me, cares for me?” The speed of her delivery shifts wildly, a mix of seething and sobbing and distress and mania. Screw rest: this girl needs help. I reach out an arm slowly. “Luna, it’s Spike. Just calm down. We can go back to Canterlot so you can rest. There are ponies missing you, including your sis—” “DIE FOUL USURPER SPAWN!!!” Several bolts of lightning strike around me, two of them nearly hitting my legs. Her own legs are now spread and she’s breathing in a rage. “FOOL NOT ME LIKE OTHERS! THERE’S JUST... too much already. So much noise, so many things breaking. Far too much light, I can’t see. It’s too blinding, too painful. Nopony notices that I cannot see. Why do you ignore it? Won’t anypony shut it off PLEASE! Have to block it out, seal it away. No, no no no it’s burning me! Searing my flesh, I-I feel it scorching my mind no please make it stop!” “You need to calm down!” I say with a raised voice, still firm and steady. “Whatever’s wrong, we can help. Just, get a hold of yourself.” She stops moving around, but that wild look is still in her eyes. “It all has to stop. It’s the only way to make it whole, silent. The only way! Madness reigns in light, but in darkness it’s all still, peaceful. Must save all... Save me, save all. No end but by making end.” Rather painful to watch, this symbol of grace and wisdom raving in a literal cage of her own design. The more I listen, the more I fear she may actually be too broken. And that’s something you never want to happen with a god. “Your Highness, I urge you to settle down. Otherwise, I’ll have to resort to using force.” Oh crap, did I really just say that? Hearing that, Luna goes stiff, then looks up to me with a deranged smile. Another bolt of lightning goes past her and I barely manage to sidestep it. The smile is gone when I look back. “The night... shall go on...” She stomps and scrapes at the ground, breathes through her nostrils, horn lowered and aimed. Eyes far, far gone. “...Then know that I’m sorry.” I lean forward, holding sheath and sword to my sides. Knee bends, focus. Watch her every move. Only the hum of the hidden sun. Then, she kicks off, and so do I. Yards turn into miles. We’re both bearing down each other as fast as we can. Static leaps from her horn as a blade of crackling electricity forms. Over a thousand years of magical and combat training running right at me. The will to move a celestial body ponified, looking to skewer me. The passing air and the approaching princess wipe those doubts away as soon as they form. The distance grows shorter. Our eyes are locked. I can feel the heat of that sparking lance. Finally... There’s a flash like quicksilver as we pass each other, then everything stops. No breath, no movement. I keep my sword and arm level and outstretched, never shifting from my kneeling position. Feeling soreness in my knee, but that means I’m alive. I let out a silent breath, noting the lack of any from behind. I spin my blade and slide it into its sheath at my side solemnly. When the hilt clacks in place, the moon shatters. There are vast green fields all around when I open my eyes. Standing up, I take in the azure of the sky visible amidst heavy clouds, the warmth of the sun through them, and the vista of the distant mountains and shaded forests. It’s like awaking from a dream. But turning around, I find the morbid evidence that says otherwise. Luna, once majestic and steadfast, is a lump of bloodied fur on the ground across from me. I cross the overcast field to investigate. Coming up to her, I spot the opening in her chest, still seeping crimson. Apart from that, everything looks normal. A light breeze blows at her mane, now bereft of her magic and reverting to a light, solid blue. Her face no longer looks haggard, as though she’s sleeping for the first time in weeks. Close by, I see the griffon kid staring at me (guess he wanted to see how it ends). His beak is a agape, soundless either out of amazement, shock, both, I cannot say (I give him a wave, anyway). Can’t say exactly how this came about, either. There had been signs, maybe, but for it to get this out of hand? You’d think after Nightmare Moon they’d keep tabs on this. Perhaps it was abrupt, too sudden for anyone to notice. Or maybe she hid it due to some major trust issues. Maybe something else. At present, none of that matters. I should count myself hella lucky. A goddess would have no trouble making a smear outta me, but madness and fatigue made her sluggish. And now, lying on grass soaked in royal blood, the Princess of the Moon is finally at peace. Not the exit she deserved, but quick and clean nevertheless. She may have been cold toward us near the end, but there was no ill will on my behalf. Sleep well, Luna. I suppose it’s the least I could’ve done for you. It occurs to me that a storm might be brewing when there’s a familiar purple flash. Then I realize the worst may not yet be over. The next words I hear practically confirm it. “Spike... What have you done?” DEATH by DRAGON End of ADJUDICATOR Arc SELENEICIDE end *The Lunatic is on the grass...