OH, COME ON!
The multiverse hates me. It’s the only rational conclusion I can draw that fits all of the available data.
I cast one spell. One stupid little thought-it-was-just-a-specialized-divination spell, and a few months later I’m holding a blood spattered, sixteen-hundred year old letter. A letter written by the pony who used to be my hero until I found out he was kind of a jerk, and telling me that pretty much everything I’ve ever believed about the Elements of Harmony is completely wrong. Where exactly did I completely lose control of my life?
I turn the letter over to look at what’s written on the back. Just as it promised there are a set of coordinates and instructions there, a location in time and space where Star Swirl is waiting for me, supposedly right on the verge of death. Worst of all the letter says not to share it with the Princesses or anypony else. Why would he possibly want that? I have dinner with Princess Celestia and my friends in half an hour to celebrate this whole time travel ordeal being over. How am I supposed to celebrate now? I just had to come straight up to my room to look at his research on the Elements of Harmony. What’s in there that Celestia felt the need to suppress after Star Swirl disappeared? With a trembling hoof I reach into the cubby and pull out the stack of papers hidden within. Either Star Swirl had his own organization system or the notes aren’t in any particular order. I give up trying to make sense of them for the moment, and just reread the letter for the fifth time. The promise of another message disguised as a prophecy will be worth following up on first, even if the last one was vague to the point of being nearly useless.
The prospect of other timelines though, that’s as exciting as it is scary. If they’re like the other one with that other me, they must have branched off from points where somepony used the Elements of Harmony. That’s how Star Swirl described it. But the other times the Elements have been used were times when Equestria was in desperate trouble. If they failed...
I’m roused from my thoughts by a pounding on the door. “Twilight?” asks Spike’s voice from outside, “are you ready to go down to dinner? I’m hungry.”
“Sure Spike, just a moment,” I say and quickly pack the notes back in the cubby hole and reseal it. The illusion spell that concealed this little hidey hole from everypony for sixteen hundred years reasserts itself and the wall looks perfectly undisturbed again. I step out into the hallway where my assistant is waiting, tapping a foot against the stone floor. “Shall we?”
“Yeah! Oh boy, I can’t wait for the celebration feast. The royal kitchens always have the best gems and Amuse Bouche knows just how to carve them,” says Spike as we walk through the hall. He’s going on about some gravel-based porridge dish while I’m thinking about what the right thing to do is. We arrive at the dining hall and even though we’re a bit early, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Princess Celestia are already there. Pinkie is talking to the Princess. Maybe talking at the Princess would be a better descriptor, although she seems to be gamely following along with Pinkie's train of thought. I only catch the very tail end of whatever they were just discussing.
“Yes, I can certainly see why you’d think he was crazy for suggesting oatmeal, of all things, under those particular circumstances,” says Princess Celestia.
“I know, right?” says Pinkie. “Hi Twilight! Did you send Star Swirl back yet? I bet he’s happy to be home. Or was happy, a long time ago.”
“I hope so,” I reply. I make a conscious effort not to look directly at the Princess while simultaneously not looking like I’m not looking at her. I doubt I’m pulling it off.
If the Princess does notice something wrong she doesn’t comment on it. “Luna sends her regrets. She won’t be joining us for dinner, she feels she needs a little solitude after the last few days.”
“Well, I should certainly think so!” says Rarity. “Reuniting with her beau after centuries apart, only to have to give him up again with the knowledge that their love still connects them across the vast ocean of time? That he’s even now back in her embrace in the distant past while she’s left with only old memories of it for comfort? Why a lady could take days to properly brood over something so wonderfully tragic!” she clutches at her chest as she's swept up in the romance of it all for just a moment before she comes back to her senses. “I mean... heh heh... I do hope she feels better soon.”
Celestia is spared from having to respond to that by the arrival of my three other friends, chatting away about the day we just spent with Star Swirl and Luna out in Canterlot. Wow, was that earlier today? It feels like it was months ago now. They sit down at the table and a veritable swarm of waiters appear with appetizers. The other seven tuck in with varying levels of enthusiasm, but I mostly just push the food around on my plate while the others talk around me. Remembering how fresh the blood on the letter smelled robs me of my appetite.
“Um... Twilight? Is everything alright? Does your food not taste good?” asks Fluttershy. She’s seated next to me and, well, she's Fluttershy so her voice doesn’t carry very far or interrupt the conversation the others are having.
“It’s fine, Fluttershy. I’m just not that hungry,” I say, hoping to move on before anypony else notices what she has. I’m too late. Now Rainbow Dash glances over too, and I doubt I have more than a few seconds until she says something that draws the attention of the rest of the table. I guess I could fake a stomach ache. I’ll be fine as long as the conversation doesn’t turn to-
“Hey, I’ll eat that if you don’t want it, Twilight. Whenever we use the Elements of Harmony I’m always starving for, like, three days afterwards,” says Rainbow Dash.
Naturally.
“You’re starvin’ most of the rest of the time too, Rainbow. Don’t think ah don’t notice the piles of apple cores that mysteriously appear under trees you’ve been nappin’ in,” says Applejack.
“Maybe. You and Star Swirl studied them a little bit before he left, right?” asks Rainbow Dash.
“No!” I say, loud enough to disturb the other conversations going on around the table. “I mean, so what if we did study the Elements? It’s not like I found out anything new. I certainly didn’t come into possession of any kind of forbidden information about them!”
I don’t think I’d be a very good spy.
“Twilight, whatever are you going on about?” asks Rarity with a small frown.
“Oh, it isn’t anything important. Just a silly idea Star Swirl had. I’m sure that the Princess isn’t suppressing or hiding anything from me,” I continue as I dig myself even deeper.
“Actually, I am,” says Celestia as she dabs her mouth with a napkin.
Now all eyes turn to her as I stare in shock, unable to believe what I’m hearing. “...what?” is all I can get out after a long silence.
“I am hiding Star Swirl’s work on the Elements of Harmony,” she goes on to say. “By the way, do you want the bisque for your soup course? That’s what I usually prefer but it seems the kitchen has prepared an excellent gumbo as well, which I was considering having instead.”
“But why?” I ask.
“Well, I thought that something a little spicier would pair nicely with-”
“You know what I mean!”
Celestia sighs and lowers the menu card she had been examining, her attempt at defusing the tension in the room thwarted. “Yes, I do. I’m sure that Star Swirl found a way to send you a message, and that by now you’ve either found or soon will find the work he did on the Elements of Harmony. All I ask is that you listen to my side of the story before you choose what to do with it.”
I suppose I owe her at least that much. The others make no move to say anything, and I sense that they’re waiting for me to make the choice on their behalf. “I’m listening,” I say with doubt and caution dribbling from my voice.
“Thank you, Twilight. You already know that Star Swirl and I had something of a falling out later in his life, yes?” she asks. I nod. It was what she wouldn’t discuss with me while he was still here. She claimed it was to prevent disruptions to the timeline, but now I don’t know what to believe. “It was over his work with the Elements. The first few years after he returned from this time period he was a changed pony. He was friendlier, more pleasant, and he even began to reach out to the ponies around him which was something I’d been futilely begging him to try. Now I know I have you and your friends’ influence to thank for that.”
“I still don’t understand,” I say.
“Let me finish. Luna took the Element of Magic and carried it away some time later. If she’d told me what she planned to do with it I would have stopped her, but she didn’t. Months afterwards she returned with the necklaces you’re all familiar with.”
“Yes, the Elements of Harmony,” says Rarity.
Celestia smiles, and I see her shifting more and more into teacher mode as she speaks. “Well, yes and no. The Elements of Harmony have existed since long before that, perhaps since the world began or even longer. Luna and I have always been able to call upon them in times of need by working together, no crown or necklaces required. This regalia of harmony was something related, but distinct.”
“Now just hang on a tick. So you’re sayin’ that there’s the Elements of Harmony, and now there’s a whole ‘nother thing called the Regalia of Harmony, and we’ve been mixin’ ‘em up all this time?” asks Applejack, confused.
“Maybe we should call them something distinct to avoid confusion,” I suggest. I ponder the quandary for a moment. What about an acronym? Everything’s better with acronyms. “How about, just for the sake of argument, we call them the Roh?”
“Roh?” repeats Celestia, raising a skeptical eyebrow.
“Fight the pow-ah!” shouts Pinkie. We all turn to her, Celestia’s story momentarily forgotten. “What?” she asks.
“...on second thought, just ‘the regalia’ should be fine,” I mutter. Oh well, it was a stupid name anyway.
“As I was saying,” continues Celestia, determined to power through the momentary derailing, “the regalia are how mortal ponies such as you and your friends are able to tap into the same energies. They serve as a focus, if you like. I’m a bit embarrassed to admit that if I’d had my way back then they would have been destroyed on the spot.”
“Destroyed?” gasps Fluttershy, “but why?”
“Oh! Oh! I know!” says Pinkie stretching a hoof as far into the air as it will go. “I bet it was because sometimes being Princess means you have to make hard choices like when you have three ponies who all want the last slice of carrot cake and you have to pick just one of them to get it and the other two get upset and they're like PEW PEW RAINBOW FRIENDSHIP DEATH LASER KABLOOIE!”
“A surprisingly apt summary, thank you Pinkie,” says Celestia, a little brightness returning to her eyes for the first time since starting her explanation. “Yes, I did fear the consequences of putting such power in mortal hooves. Shortly thereafter Star Swirl began to regress. Locking himself away with the Elements for weeks at a time to experiment with them. Pushing away the friends he’d managed to make. He grew utterly enthralled, and when I questioned him he refused to give me a straight answer about why he felt so strongly about them.”
"He stopped having friends?" asks Pinkie, as if the very idea is the most foreign thing she's ever heard. "Why that... that... that cur!" It's the closest I've seen her get to swearing. I'm surprised she even knows what the word means. "He was kind of a cur when he got here, but we showed him how to be nice. Why would he re-cur over the Elements?"
“It was Luna,” I say as the words of Star Swirl’s first letter echo in my head. “He knew what you would eventually do with them.”
“I suspect you’re right,” says Celestia. “But that is with the benefit of hindsight. At the time, I feared that I was seeing my most dire predictions being confirmed before my eyes. After one particularly heated argument, I put my hoof down and forbade Star Swirl to study the regalia any more. That was... that was the last time he ever spoke to me.” Princess Celestia takes a moment to compose herself. “Please understand, he had become obsessed and paranoid in the years since he’d returned from our present. I thought that what I’d done was right at the time, but a few years later he just up and vanished. Luna and I were both heartbroken, but we carried on. It wasn’t the first time we’d lost loved ones.”
“You didn’t have to suppress his work, though,” I point out.
“Perhaps not,” she concedes, “but after I used them to seal away Nightmare Moon, and the regalia along with her, I felt it prudent. Then a few years ago when the seal collapsed and you used them to defeat her... I was scared.”
My mouth drops open, and it’s Fluttershy of all ponies who flaps over to Celestia and wraps a wing as far around her back as she can manage. “Why were you scared?”
“Twilight... there’s a reason I left you in Ponyville and took the regalia back to Canterlot with me. Partly it was that you’d requested it, but partly... I didn’t want to lose another student the way I lost Star Swirl. So I hid the truth from you, and I’m sorry,” says Celestia. She allows herself a sad little smile. “Perhaps I only delayed the inevitable.”
I’m confused and upset in equal measure. Nothing she’s said explains Star Swirl’s second letter, the one about the Elements being an intelligent, manipulative force. I freeze up. Maybe... she doesn’t know? That second letter looked like it was written in a hurry, and if the two hadn’t been on speaking terms for years...
When was the last time I knew something the Princess didn’t? Has there been a last time?
“I understand, Princess.” In fact, I understand more than she meant me to. I won’t rest until-
I look down at my plate, and my vision takes a bit longer than it should to focus. My stomach is churning with all this new stress, not that the past is going anywhere. I think I will rest, actually. I’ve earned it. I’m not sure quite how, but I manage to make it through the rest of the meal without passing out despite how late it is. The mood is a lot less celebratory than my friends deserve. I hope I don't have to drag them into this, especially if it turns out to be dangerous. By any measure the rest of the meal is delicious, but I still find it unsatisfying and excuse myself before dessert.
The others let me go, and before I return to my room for the night I swing by the library. Nopony’s using it this late in the evening, which suits me fine. I hunt down the book of prophecies Star Swirl referenced, the one he used to pass on a message to himself when we were trying to figure out how to repair the damage I’d done to the timestream. I flip it open to... what page was it again? Right, two hundred and forty-seven. I read what’s written there by the dim candlelight that casts long shadows around the room.
The ephemeral made physical,
perfection confined, touched by an imperfect world.
Destruction born not out of wrath,
but rather disappointment.
Have I ever mentioned how much I loathe prophecies? Just once, I’d like to crack open an ancient tome and read something like Hey Twilight, big disaster next week. Take simple steps X, Y, and Z to prevent it. PS: Pick up a new carton of milk on the way home, the one in your fridge went bad two days ago. Is that too much to ask? With a sigh I reread the passage and then close the book, turning the words over in my head and trying to make sense of them. Paired with the letter from earlier they’re clearly some sort of warning, but I can’t deduce much beyond that. Maybe I’m just too run down to think straight right now. With a small sigh I head back to my room to turn in for the night, and fall asleep wondering just what I’m supposed to do next.
The next morning Celestia sees us off to the train station with another apology and a hug. She even presents me with a bound copy of Star Swirl’s research into the Elements to go with the saddlebags full of notes. I’m still a little upset that she kept the truth about the Elements from me for so long, and I decide to heed the letter’s warning and not tell her anything else. At least not until I can get a handle on Star Swirl’s version. I almost convince myself that it’s a perfectly defensible decision, and not even a little bit out of spite.
I do, however, share the letter with my friends over the course of the train ride home. I don’t know if it’s the wise thing to do or not, but I do it anyway. “...so that’s what I found when I looked in the cubby, and now I don’t know what to do about it.” I finish my recap just as we’re disembarking from the train onto the platform in Ponyville Station.
“Does sound like a bit of a tall tale, sugarcube,” says Applejack. “Could be that ah’m a tad biased, but ah don’t see how somethin’ like honesty or kindness could have a plan, let alone one that’d be bad for us pony folk. They’ve pulled our flanks outta the fire more than once.”
“Yeah,” agrees Rainbow Dash. “‘Didn’t Princess Celestia say that Star Swirl got a little crazy at the end there? Maybe it was all in his head. I’m certainly not being manipulated by a necklace.”
“But if we were how would we even know?” I ask. “It can’t just be in his head. Luna said that they did something to her when she got back from the moon, but she wouldn’t say what.”
“Well I know because I’m way too awesome to be manipulated,” says Rainbow Dash.
“Of course you are, dear,” says Rarity. “Say, would you mind lending me a helping hoof with one of my bags?” She scoops up the four suitcases and the trunk of ‘absolute essentials’ she had taken with her to Canterlot for our three day stay, visibly straining to cover it all with a field of her magic.
Rainbow Dash scoffs. “Maybe you should have packed less if you can’t carry it all.”
“I’m only asking you to take one bag,” Rarity says, a bit cross. She turns her head so Rainbow can’t see the sly grin that’s spreading over her face, or the subtle twinkle in her eyes. “It’s not like I’m asking you to carry the trunk. Your wings probably aren’t strong enough to get it all the way to my boutique, after all.”
“What? Oh, it is so on! I’ll show you who’s not strong enough,” says Rainbow Dash as she grabs the trunk by the handle on one side. Hoisting it into the air with a grunt, she begins flapping awkwardly down the road. Fluttershy can’t hold in a little giggle once she’s out of earshot.
“I really must agree with Applejack, Twilight,” says Rarity. “Even if it is the case that Star Swirl’s gotten himself into danger, that doesn’t make you responsible for saving him.”
“Rarity! How can you say that? He’s our friend,” I say. I can’t believe she’d be so callous.
“I think what Rarity means is, um, well sometimes you do put a lot of pressure on yourself to fix other ponies’ problems,” says Fluttershy. “Don’t misunderstand, that’s wonderful most of the time but maybe just this once you could not think you have to save the world? I mean, you only even met Star Swirl because of all that time stuff, and that wasn’t going to be an issue for hundreds of years.”
“That was different. It was my fault it was a problem in the first place,” I say, but I’m having trouble shaking the notion that her broader point might be right.
“Besides, you already know you’d fail if you went, so why bother?” asks Pinkie.
“Pinkie! Don’t worry Twi, ah’m sure you’d do fine if you did go,” says Applejack.
“No she wouldn’t, silly! Otherwise she already would have,” says Pinkie.
I figure out what she means a moment later, but Applejack doesn’t. “Ah don’t follow, Pinkie.”
“She means that if I went back and helped him, he wouldn’t have disappeared in the first place because I would have already changed it so it didn’t happen,” I explain. I’ve been so wrapped up in trying to decide if I should go back to help him I never stopped to consider that it might not even be possible. “He said he was going to a different time line, though. That must be where the coordinates he gave me will let me meet him.”
“You still don’t have to worry then,” says Pinkie, undeterred. “It can be other Twilight’s problem! Or maybe there’s a third timeline where you decide to go to that second timeline and help him so main timeline you can just relax!”
“Am ah the only one who’s completely lost here?” asks Applejack.
“No, you certainly are not,” says Rarity. “Should I get out some yarn? That helped last time.”
“It doesn’t work that way, Pinkie. It’s not like every time you flip a coin and it comes up heads, it creates a universe where it came up tails,” I say.
“What if your coin comes up tails? Does it work then?”
“No, Pinkie. It takes a lot more than that. Star Swirl was one of the first ponies to pioneer how they could be created, it’s part of how he was able to come up with that time loop spell at all,” I say.
“Oh, I get it! Because if there were infinity other timelines and it were possible for them to visit each other than infinity ponies would end up visiting ours all the time, and all of Equestria would collapse into a welcome party singularity,” says Pinkie.
“Well, actually that isn't the case either. See there are these things called aleph numbers that-”
“I believe we might be losing sight of the original question,” interrupts Rarity before I can really get going on cardinality and set theory. “Now, I need to go open up the boutique for the afternoon if I’m going to have any hope of getting some work done today but I believe the consensus among the four of us is that you should disregard the letter, at least for the time being. Is that fair to say?” The other three mares nod. I sigh. They’re probably right.
“Thanks girls, I should get back to the library too. I’ll see you later," I say, and we say our goodbyes before they head off in other directions. It’s just me and Spike on our way back to the library. “You know, I can’t help but notice you didn’t say very much about what you think I should do about Star Swirl, Spike.”
Spike gives a little shrug. “I didn’t think I needed to bother,” he says. “I think that going after Star Swirl would be a terrible idea, I think you know that it would be a terrible idea, and I think the minute you read that a friend of yours was in trouble you made up your mind to go anyway.”
I stop dead in my tracks as Spike walks on, the library just now coming into sight. “I’m not that predictable,” I say.
“Yes, you are,” he says without bothering to look back. The worst part is that I’m pretty sure he’s right. A few quickened steps later I catch up to him right before we reach the front door and I glance up as I unlock it.
“Spike, you forgot to close the upstairs window when we left. What if it had rained?” I say.
“Come on, Twilight, there isn’t any rain scheduled until that storm later tonight. I could have sworn I remembered, though,” he says. We push open the door and step inside. Other than a few sunbeams streaming in through the windows the room is dark.
“Let’s get some lights on in here,” I suggest and Spike walks into the kitchen looking for a lantern.
I don’t even notice the dark shape above until it drops down onto my back and wraps a pair of legs around me. The sudden weight makes me cry out and stagger. I try to turn my head to see what it is, and as I do what feels like a hoof traces its way up to my cheek and gently guides my chin upward.
Luckily for me, the thing on my back pulls me into a deep kiss instead of ripping open my jugular vein.
“Welcome home, Twilight. I missed you,” says a mare's voice when the kiss finally ends.
“Azalea!” My panic turns into elation. It would probably be bad for my burgeoning love life to tell my fillyfriend I was about three seconds away from disintegrating her, so I tactically neglect to mention it.
“I saw you getting off the train about ten minutes ago, and decided I wanted to surprise you,” she says as she moves in to give my cheek a nuzzle.
“Well you certainly did that. I had no idea you were so quiet,” I say.
“I can be sneaky when I want to be,” she replies with a playful little giggle. A moment later, though, it turns into a frown. “You know, I’m realizing that I sort of just broke into your house. Sorry.”
“You didn’t rummage through my things or anything, right?”
“Of course not!”
“Well, I’ll let it slide this time. I guess this means you owe me one, though,” I say.
“Oh, I’m sure there’s some way I can make it up to you,” she says. The way her voice drops over the course of that sentence makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up with anticipation.
“Oh, gag me,” says Spike from the far side of the room.
Azalea laughs and with a flap of her wings lifts herself up off of my back before landing in the center of the room. “Good to see you again too, Spike.”
“Hi Azalea,” he says. “Do you two want anything special from the market? I was going to head into town and restock our pantry.”
“Just what’s on the list. Thanks Spike, you’re the best,” I reply.
“Better than sitting around here watching you get all lovey-dovey,” grumbles Spike. Grabbing a few bags, he heads right back out the front door leaving Azalea and me alone.
Azalea trots over to a nearby couch and hops up onto it, patting the empty space beside her and looking at me expectantly. I move to join her, and it’s not very long before we’re wrapped up in one another’s legs. “So I take it that everything in Canterlot went well?”
I shudder a bit, which doesn’t go unnoticed. “...more or less,” I say after a long pause.
“Something wrong?” asks Azalea, the worry in her voice poorly concealed.
“We fixed everything, I sent Star Swirl back to his own time, and I got a ton of new information about the Elements of Harmony,” I say.
“That sounds great,” says Azalea. “I almost didn’t notice how you completely avoided answering my question.”
I snort a little despite myself. “I guess I did, didn’t I? It’s just something I don’t want to think about right now,” I say.
Azalea frowns but lets me bury my face into her chest without comment. I’m trying so, so hard not to imagine how scared Star Swirl was as he wrote that letter. How desperate he must have been if his last hope was some mare he only knew for a few weeks and who wouldn’t even be born for hundreds upon hundreds of years. How-
“Twilight, you’re crying,” whispers Azalea. I blink a few times, and sure enough wet trails are carving a path down my face. I don’t bother to say anything in reply for a little while, electing instead just to hold her while she strokes my mane.
“When is it going to stop?” I ask nopony in particular. “I’m tired, Azalea. I’m so, so tired of the way things keep happening to me. Star Swirl’s in trouble, and he asked me for help but...”
“But you’re tired,” says Azalea. I nod rather than risk letting my voice break as I answer her. I talked about this the entire ride home. I don’t want to talk about it any more and I certainly don’t want to dump all my troubles on her.
“I should be staying here, and planning something special the two of us could do together. Can you believe that technically we’ve only been on one date?” I ask her. “Think about it, Applejack set that one up. I’ve never actually asked you out.”
“You don’t have to, Twilight. You’re special to me, and I know that. You don’t have to call the time we spend together a date for it to count,” she says.
“But I still don’t know what I’m doing! What are the rules for this sort of thing? I mean, we’ve been seeing each other for weeks now. How long am I supposed to wait before I ask to, I don’t know, meet your parents?”
Azalea stiffens. I worry that I said something wrong but I’m not quite sure what. “The longer the better on that front,” she mutters, an uncharacteristic note of bitterness invading her voice. I wait for her to continue, but she doesn’t.
“Why?” I eventually prompt. “I’d like to meet them someday.”
Azalea is quiet for a long, long time, just holding me against her. I’ve given up hope on getting a response by the time she speaks up again. “I haven’t really spoken to my parents in a while. A long while,” she says.
“You haven’t? Did something happen?” I ask. I’ve never heard Azalea mention her parents with anything but affection. Could there be something between them I didn’t pick up on?
“You might say that,” she says. I could press her to tell me more, or I could let her off the hook by changing the subject. I do neither. If we both have things we don’t want to share, then so be it. My ear is right up against her chest, and I can hear the way her heartbeat has started to quicken. “You are impossibly wonderful, Twilight,” she says. “No matter what I just want to be sure you know that. Listen, the truth is that I haven’t always been-”
Whatever she was about to say is drowned out by a loud rapping on a nearby window. We both groan at the interruption and I roll off of the couch to investigate. Rainbow Dash waves at me from outside, and I walk over to let her in. "Can I help you?" I ask.
"Hey Twilight. I'm not interrupting something, am I?" she asks.
She is. "No, of course not. What's on your mind?" As much as I'd love to tell her to get lost, I'm sure she wouldn't have come to see me if it weren't important. After all, we just rode the train back from Canterlot together so it isn't like she'd just drop in to catch up.
"I swung by the weather office on the way to my house. One of the other ponies there reported seeing changelings at the edge of the forest,” she says.
I frown. Most of the changelings who attacked Canterlot were transformed when we used the Elements of Harmony, but the ones who weren’t are still dangerous. Packs of feral changelings have been spotted all over Equestria. Without a Queen to guide them they aren’t quite as threatening as they used to be, but to outlying towns like Ponyville they’re still a potential risk. If there’s a pack of them nearby, they need to be pushed back before they can try to infiltrate the community. “Do they need us to go deal with them? Can’t the guard handle it?”
“They’d feel better if we tagged along, you know, since you’ve got the reputation of being Equestria’s number-one changeling flank kicker these days. Me being a close second, of course.”
I sigh. “Fine, let’s get it over with. Azalea, I’m really sorry but I need to go deal with this.”
“It’s fine, Twilight. Be safe,” she says giving me a quick peck for good luck.
“Uh, Twilight, aren’t you forgetting something?” asks Rainbow Dash. She bobs her head in Azalea’s direction. “Ahem. Cough. Cough cough.”
“I really don’t think that’s necessary, Dash,” I say. Bad enough she’s pulling me away from Azalea just when we run into each other again.
“Hey, you know the rules and protocols. You’re the one who wrote them. You can’t go giving out special treatment just because you like somepony,” says Rainbow Dash. This coming from the mare best known for the blatant favoritism she displays towards the ponies she manages on the weather team, but it isn’t worth making a royal case over.
“I don’t mind,” says Azalea, “actually it kind of tickles.”
I shrug and with a quick spark from my horn a current of magic arches from me to Azalea’s chest. Nothing happens when it hits her, but had she been a disguised changeling she would have been forced back into her natural form. “You too, Dash,” I say. Rainbow Dash doesn’t protest and I repeat the test again on her with another negative result. I’ve gotten pretty quick with that particular spell. I had a whole lot of time and opportunities to practice it. “Just give me one minute and I’ll meet you out front.”
Rainbow Dash flies back out the window, a habit I’ve given up hope of ever breaking her of. “Sorry about this. Before we were interrupted, were you trying to tell me something about your parents?” I ask.
“Oh, it isn’t important right now. I’ll see you sometime over the next couple of days and we can talk about it then.” We walk out the front door together to where Rainbow Dash is waiting and I wave goodbye to Azalea.
The changeling ‘infestation’ turns out to be completely underwhelming. Rainbow, three guards, and myself up against four malnourished drones. I probably could have taken care of it single hoofed, and before long we’ve scattered them and forced them to retreat into the depths of the Everfree. It’s the work of two hours, tops. Trotting back along the road towards Ponyville, I think I've earned the right to grumble a little bit about it.
“Hey, I know it turned out not to be a big deal but thanks for coming with me to take care of this, Twilight. I know it meant a lot to the guards. Of course, I could have personally fought all of ‘em myself blindfolded with a hoof tied behind my back, but I guess I appreciate it too,” says Rainbow Dash. “A lot of the ponies around here still freak out whenever they hear the word ‘changeling.’”
“Why? The invasion was only in Canterlot.”
“Well yeah, but it still spooked us. I mean, it spooked them. Think about it, nopony had any idea what was going on, they probably got all kinds of conflicting reports, the Elements of Harmony go off and some of their neighbors turn into totally different ponies. I heard one changeling that got turned into another copy of Bon Bon was even run out of town that first afternoon.”
“Really? What about Kicky?” I ask.
“She’s only still around because Cloud Kicker stuck up for her, hid her inside their house until word arrived that the changelings were actually reformed, then ponies got over it pretty quickly. I asked Cloudy about it once. She said that Kicky had all her memories from West Hoof and stuff, and as far as she was concerned she was part of her clan. Cloud Kicker takes that kind of thing really seriously.”
I weigh the new information in my mind for a little while, the only sound around us the wind rustling through the tall grass of the field we’re walking beside. I remember how I first reacted to the idea of former changelings integrating into pony society. They aren’t memories I’m proud of, especially not the family dinner that almost ended in me taking poor Butterscotch’s head off. I’d actually fought off the invasion, too. It must have been doubly terrifying to all the ponies who had been helpless during it.
“Uh, actually, I kinda had an ultimate motive for bringing you along, too,” says Dash as she looks up at a nearby cloud to avoid my questioning gaze.
“You mean an ‘ulterior’ motive, right?”
“Yeah, one of those too. I thought that maybe it wouldn’t hurt to remind you that, y’know, you do a lot to help out around here and maybe you don’t need to go chasing after some big disaster just because you got a letter.”
I smile. “Don’t worry, Dash, I’m not going to just up and disappear on you guys. At the very least I need to go through decades of research by the greatest mind of the last two thousand years,” I say, ’’so that’ll probably take two or three days.”
Indeed, once we get back to the library and I’ve said goodbye to Rainbow Dash for the time being the first thing I do is fish Star Swirl’s notes and the copy of his work Celestia gave me out of my bulging saddlebag. I open the book up to a random section and hunt down the corresponding section of Star Swirl’s notes. In this case, it’s a few paragraphs speculating on the purpose of the filagree that that supports the Element of Magic’s central jewel. Both copies match one another other than a few sentences here and there that have been reworded for clarity. I repeat the process three more times with other sections of the book, and get the same results. It seems safe to say that the copy of the book Celestia provided is legitimate. I hate that I even felt I needed to verify it, but the knowledge that she actively concealed this for so long and explicitly chose not to share it with me has left my faith in her a bit shaken.
I begin to read. The first few chapters go quickly since they don’t tell me anything I don’t already know. Mostly they just describe the physical characteristics, speculate about the cut of the gemstones. It seems in his day they were more geometric and uniform rather than stylized representations of my friends’ cutie marks. I’m noticing that a lot of what he’s written is speculative, actually. For a pony who spent twenty years working with the Elements, he doesn’t seem to have drawn very many definitive conclusions.
One big exception is a chapter centered around some very clever experiments in probability alteration due to exposure to the Element of Magic. Even when the crown was only physically present, Star Swirl found that events or systems would trend towards more orderly and harmonious states, sometimes to the point that implied they were entirely ignoring basic entropy.
The implications are mind boggling. The Elements might have passive effects, and change the environment around them even when they aren’t in use? How could the Princess not allow such promising experiments to continue? I check Star Swirl’s notes to see if there might be more information than what’s in the final edition of his work.
Soon enough I find my answer. Celestia did want the research to go on. Several other researchers tried to reproduce Star Swirl’s findings and every one of them failed. Nor could Star Swirl figure out how to replicate the effects with any of the other five, despite trying for years. His personal notations in the margins grow increasingly angry and rambling at what he sees as the other researchers’ failings. The phrase ‘morons who couldn’t tell a test tube from their own plot’ makes several appearances. More ominously, some of his notes suggest that he began to believe somepony or something was working against him, actively trying to undermine his credibility.
I find that hard to believe. No wonder Celestia felt he was growing unhinged and paranoid. Still, I can’t help but ache in sympathy as I read of how his frustration grew and grew as his reputation suffered. Maybe suppressing this work was a blessing after all, ensuring that ponies would remember Star Swirl for his other great accomplishments rather than his failings. I wish that Celestia had let me take the Elements back here with me so I could try the experiment myself, but she denied my request when I asked her. Probably for exactly this reason.
Odd that it would only work for the Element of Magic. I try to think about the other Elements, and my mind can’t help but jump to their bearers. Does being around the Element of Laughter make me feel freer, happier, cheerier? Well, yes, but usually when I’m near the Element it’s because Pinkie’s wearing it, and I always feel those things when I’m around Pinkie. The same goes for the other four too, and their respective Elements. I can’t reasonably conclude that just because being around the bearers of an Element makes me feel something like that it’s due to the workings of the Element itself. Correlation is hardly causation, after all.
I read on, and it’s not far into the chapter wherein Star Swirl tried to activate them when I discover why he was never successful. It’s pretty much all summed up in one paragraph:
Search for bearers unsuccessful. No matter what I do, the candidates I’ve selected seem unwilling to join in my endeavor despite the power I can promise them. The ones who do approach me are failures, lacking in some way or another, and insufficient for my cause. Based on events unduplicatable in a laboratory setting, only the strongest ponies can bear the Elements. Nopony believes me, I know, but the six mares I’ve observed using the Elements surpass them all. How? How did Twilight find such exemplary subjects? I wish I had asked her.
Damn it Star Swirl. You’re an idiot. I mean sure, you’re brilliant, but you’re an idiot.
If you had bothered to ask, I would have told you that I never would have picked these five ponies to be bearers right when I met them. Friendship isn’t supposed to be a means to an end. You don’t pick your friends, my experience has been that they just... happen, once you've opened yourself up to the possibility. If I had shut out any one of them because I didn’t think they were worth my while, and to be completely frank I probably would have had I not been so desperate at the time, I would have missed out on an entire world of experiences and perspectives. How many amazing ponies did you reject, because you couldn’t see how wonderful they were?
I suppose I won’t ever know. I just wish I could go back and... well, I’d probably smack him. But it would be for his own good. If anypony ever needed a lecture on the nature of friendship, it’s him. How could he misinterpret everything he saw while he was here so awfully?
Easy, Twilight, he didn’t experience the same crises you did. Before I met my friends, I probably would have done the exact same thing. Still, when I see him again he’s getting a talking to.
If. If I see him again. Because I still haven’t decided whether I’m even going back to help him yet. Yep, that’s totally up in the air. No final decision made yet. Could go either way.
I’m not fooling anypony, am I?
I skip ahead over quite a few other experiments, more interested now in what could have compelled him to write that second letter. Skimming over the later chapters, though, all I manage to find is more variations of the same experiment on probability and fate manipulation. What’s more, his notes grow increasingly manic. Entire pages are filled with ranting about ‘forces arrayed against him’ and ‘powers beyond his control.’ This isn’t... this isn’t what continuous exposure to the Elements does to a bearer, is it?
Checking the same passages from his personal notes sheds a little more light on what he's talking about. Odd accidents, laboratory fires, texts he wanted to check out suddenly going missing from archives. Nothing conclusive, and never anything where there was evidence of wrongdoing, but certainly suspicious. He was paranoid, but that doesn't necessarily preclude the possibility that he was right.
There’s no choice in my mind now. I have to know.
-----------------
“I’ve made up my mind. I’m going to investigate Star Swirl’s letter.”
Seven faces look at me from across the table over the steaming hot cups of tea we’re discussing this over. None of them are happy about what I’m saying. So, major accomplishments since the last time I saved all of time and space? One more pony is unhappy with me.
“Twi, ah thought we talked about this the other day,” says Applejack, “just doesn’t seem right to me that the Elements could be up to something.”
“Maybe they aren’t, and Star Swirl really did go a little nuts. Either way his letter said that he was off in another timeline, and neither of the Princesses knew any more than that. I owe it to them to find out what really happened. At the very least, I can bring Princess Luna some closure.”
“That’s quite magnanimous of you Twilight, but do promise us that you won’t take any unnecessary risks. You have a way of getting swept up in things sometimes,” says Rarity.
“Is that why you had me pack your bags last night, Twilight?” asks Spike. “You took enough stuff to last for months.”
“Relax, Spike,” I say. I take a sip of my own tea. At least one of us should enjoy it. “Time travel, remember? Even if I’m gone for days or weeks, I’ll be back later tonight.”
“Sure you will,” he mutters into his drink. It’s like he almost doesn’t believe everything will go exactly as planned.
"We could go with you," says Fluttershy. "I mean if you would go tomorrow so I could make arrangements for my animal friends."
"I won't hear of it. I've inconvenienced all of you too much already these last few months, with all the trips back and forth between here and Canterlot. I want to accomplish this on my own, but you'll be with me in spirit."
Azalea is still frowning at my decision. "As long as you promise to come back to us safe and sound."
"I promise. Safe and sound and better than ever, you have my word," I say, looking her right in the eye as I do. I hope it's enough to reassure her that I have things completely under control.
"Well, I'm not going to try to stop you if you've made up your mind, just don't do anything crazier than I would do," says Rainbow Dash.
"As if that rules anything out," says Applejack.
I finish the last of my tea. The others are lingering over theirs, shooting furtive glances between them as they silently debate the best way to talk me out of my decision, but my mind is made up. "I'll be fine, girls. Really." I rise from my seat and circle the table giving each one of them the most comforting hug I can manage. Lifting my bags up onto my back, I pay for the tea and then head for an empty field behind the restaurant followed by the others. I’ve already prepped the spell that I read out of Star Swirl’s notes, the one-way ticket to wherever and whenever he ended up. Getting back will be up to me, but I have a few options that should work.
I motion for the others to stand back and start gathering up power. It’s going to take quite a bit to travel so far. Shapes and colors dance around me as I shape my magic, molding it into the form I need. The familiar tension of unrealized potential fills the air. I cast one last look back at the friends I’m leaving behind, just for a little while.
“Wish me luck.”
With that I complete the spell and the air around me starts to ripple and tear. I focus as hard as I can on the time and location Star Swirl gave me in his letter, and his spell does the rest. A surge of power courses through me, pulling me into the void. My last conscious thought is wondering just what’s waiting for me on the other side.