It’s been two days since I broke up with Pinkie. It was a beautiful day in Ponyville. The birds were singing, bla bla bla, let’s not go into detail. Twilight was really happy that morning, that she opened her window and sang, “Morning in Ponyville shimmers!” She shut her door, and continued singing, but we’re not following Twilight in this chapter. I’m just saying Twilight was singing that song, because…. Don’t you remember when she sang that song?
Well, we actually start off over at Blaze and Rainbow Dash’s house. They were still asleep peacefully. Blaze yawns, rubs his eyes and wakes up. “Good morning, babe! Lovely night it has been, huh?”
“It sure was, darling!” Rarity said, lying down on his bed next to him.
“AAAAH!” Blaze screamed and jumped out of bed.
“What seems to be the problem, dear?” Rarity asked.
“RARITY?! What are you doing in my bed?!” Blaze yelled.
“Uhh, Blaze, we’ve been married for a very long time! You don’t remember?” Rarity asked.
“Rarity!? We’re not married!” Blaze corrected her, feeling very confused.
Rarity giggled. “Blaze, you’re such a gem! You look cute when you’re freaked out.” she said as she got out of bed, but her cutie mark seems different.
“Rarity? What are you doing with Rainbow Dash’s cutie mark?” Blaze asked.
“I’ve had this cutie mark for years, dear! What is with you this morning?” Rarity asked. “Well, it doesn’t matter. I have weather duties to do, you see.”
“Uhh.... no this isn’t right. That’s Rainbow’s cutie mark, and you’re supposed to be at your shop making dresses. Rainbow is supposed to be handling the weather, and she’s MARRIED TO ME!” Blaze explained.
“Blaze, you seriously have gone crazy this morning, dear. You should go fly around the neighborhood, or something. Ta ta!” Rarity said as she was about to exit the house.
“What is going on here, Apollo? Why was Rarity in my bed? Where’s Rainbow Dash?” Blaze asked his phoenix.
“I don’t know, master. I was up all night, and didn’t see a thing.” Apollo said.
“That is so strange. How can Rainbow and Rarity switch places without you knowing? You see everything going on around the house.” Blaze asked.
“I say you should head over to Rarity’s shop. Maybe Rainbow Dash is there.” Apollo suggested.
“Good idea, Apollo!” Blaze said.
“Thank you, master!” Apollo said.
“Will you stop calling me that?” Blaze asked.
“It shows respect.” Apollo said.
”Yeah, you already show me enough respect without calling me master.” Blaze said.
“Uhh, Blaze dear? Will you help me off the cloud, please?” Rarity asked, standing on the edge of the door because the house was on a cloud. Blaze carried his ‘wife’ out of the cloud, and went over to Rarity’s place to see if his actual wife Rainbow Dash was there. Blaze flew over there, and he walks inside.
This is the FRIENDSHIP IS EPIC: Book 2 Finale – Part 2! Let’s do this!
“Hello? Rainbow Dash? Are you here, babe?” Blaze asked.
“Hi, Blaze!” Sweetie Belle said.
“Hey, Sweetie Belle! Is Rainbow Dash here?” Blaze asked.
“I don’t know why she would, but…. AppleJack is here.” Sweetie said confusingly.
“AppleJack?” Blaze asked.
“Yeah, Aqua is here too.” Sweetie said.
“Hey, Blaze.” Aqua said.
“Hey, Aqua! What are you doing here?” Blaze asked.
“I have this small crack on my armor here. I thought Rarity might fix it up for me.” Aqua said.
“Yeah, well. I just had a confusing morning, dude.” Blaze said.
“No kiddin’. Same here.” Aqua said.
“What happened to you?” Blaze asked.
“I came to see if Rarity could fix my armor, but I was told AppleJack was here. Said this is AppleJack’s shop, and Sweetie Belle is her sister.” Aqua said.
“Ok, I know I wanted AppleJack to be my sister during the social, but c’mon! Rarity and I bonded so much since then! Now AppleJack’s is crawling back to me!” Sweets said.
“It’s not just that. AppleJack has Rarity’s cutie mark.” Aqua said.
“That’s strange, because Rarity was sleeping on my bed today, saying she’s my wife, she has to do weather duties, and she has Rainbow’s cutie mark.” Blaze said.
“Just as I thought life in Ponyville couldn’t get any weirder.” Aqua said.
“Howdy, Blaze! What brings y’all here?” AppleJack asked.
“Hey, AppleJack! I-I’m just passing through.” Blaze said.
“Alrighty then! Want me to fix that armor for you, Aqua?” AppleJack asked.
“If ya think ya can.” Aqua said.
“Sure! Y’all just check out mah other dresses ah made! Ah need yer opinion on them, sugarcube.” AppleJack said as her and Aqua started walking upstairs.
“Uhh… ok.” Aqua said. Blaze still couldn’t figure out what was going on. He went over to Sweet Apple Arces to see if his wife was there, but all he saw was a mane-deflated Pinkie Pie.
“Pinkie, what are you doing here, and why do you have AppleJack’s cutie mark?” Blaze asked.
“What are you talking about, Blaze?” Pinkie asked as she was shaking one of the apple trees.
“This doesn’t look right though. This is AppleJack’s farm, not yours.” Blaze said.
“Yeah, well… I was born and raised here, and I never see AppleJack get the guts to help me! Always bothering with those stupid dresses!” Pinkie complained.
“Look if you don’t know what you’re doing, why can’t you let your family help you?” Blaze asked.
“Because she keeps sayin’ she wants to do it herself. Sayin’ she don’t need no help.” Apple Bloom said.
“Eeeyup.” Big Mac said.
“What happened? Ah thought AppleJack was mah sister, not Pinkie!” Apple Bloom whined. “Ah mean, the only one that thinks Pinkie is actually in the family is Granny Smith!”
“Woo hoo! Go buck dem apples, granddaughter! Yer number 1! Yer number 1!” Granny Smith cheered for Pinkie, while wearing a foam finger and a hat while rocking in her chair.
“Thank you, Granny!” Pinkie waved at her as she continued attempting to buck apples. Blaze was still confused. He ran over to Fluttershy’s cottage to see if she was there. He walked over to her house, but before he arrived, Twilight and Spike were already walking out.
“Oh hey, Blaze!” Twilight said.
“Twilight, what do you do for a living?” Blaze asked.
”Uhh, I’m a student for Princess Celestia, and I own a library in Ponyville, studying the magic of friendship.” Twilight said.
“Ok, so you’re fine.” Blaze said.
“Yeah, so you figured it out too, huh?” Twilight asked.
“Of course he does! He’s married to Rainbow Dash!” Spike reminded her.
“Not anymore it seems. I’m married to Rarity now.” Blaze said.
“What?! You left Rainbow Dash for Rarity?!” Spike panicked.
“No, Spike, he means the cutie mark isn’t just changing their destinies, it’s changing their history!” Twilight corrected him.
“So, it’s like Rarity and Sweetie Belle, they’re not brother and sister, right?” Spike asked.
“Exactly!” Twlight said.
“Yeah, I saw it. I was at Rarity’s shop today and AppleJack was there.” Blaze said.
“We better go find out what’s going on with everypony, Spike! Let’s go!” Twilight said.
“Just a heads-up, Blaze. Rainbow Dash isn’t the pony you’ve known anymore.” Spike said as he and Twilight walked away.
“Thanks for the tip, dude.” Blaze said. He then walked over to Fluttershy’s house, and went inside, and saw the animals running wild in there, and Rainbow Dash has been struggling. “RAINBOW!” Blaze ran over to her and gave her a hug. “What happened, babe?”
“Babe? Who you calling, babe?” Rainbow asked in a confusing tone.
“Rainbow Dash, it’s me! Blaze Goldheart! Your husband!” Blaze said trying to get her to remember.
“Blaze, I don’t know what’s your problem, but I really don’t have time to care right now.” Rainbow said, trying calm down the raccoons by patting them up the back.
“Rainbow Dash, this isn’t your destiny! You’ve dreamed of being the Wonderbolts, you handle the weather in town, you’re married to me, and you have a beautiful daughter named Rose at our house right now!” Blaze explained.
“Rose? She’s your and Rartiy’s daughter, Blaze!” Rainbow said as she pushed an ant eater away from her hoof after it was sniffing it.
“Rainbow, what is going on with you?!” Blaze yelled.
“Look, Blaze, I don’t have time with you right now, so if you please, leave!” Rainbow ordered him as Hairy the Bear started wrestling with her.
“You need me to help you out though?” Blaze asked.
“Thank you, but I got it under control here.” Rainbow said, as she body slams the bear.
“Oh…. Ok.” Blaze said upsettingly as he walked out. When he walked out, the whole house started shaking. He really wanted to help, but he couldn’t. He was feeling too upset because Rainbow doesn’t remember anything. She thinks she’s Fluttershy. Blaze just went over and sat on a bench near Sugarcube Corner. He sighed and said, “What is the big idea? How could this happen?”
Just then, the doors to Sugarcube Corner slammed open, and the ponies inside started angrily marching out, complaining about the terrible humor that Fluttershy was giving in there. “Wait! Don’t leave! I got a funny joke!” Flutters begged. “Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven nine eight! Get it?”
“That doesn’t make any sense!” Roseluck complained.
“Yeah, you suck!” Vinyl Scratch taunted. Fluttershy sighed upsettingly and walked back inside, and Psyche and Crystal walked out.
“That was terrible! I couldn’t find anymore dead humor than I experienced here!” Crystal complained.
“Now, now, Crystal. I’m sure we can figure out what’s going on here.” Psyche said.
“But didn’t you see how awful that was? I thought Fluttershy was supposed to bring smiles on our faces?” Crystal complained.
“No, Pinkie is supposed to do that. Somehow, Fluttershy ended up with her cutie mark, and Pinkie is nowhere to be found.” Psyche corrected her.
“You’re not making any sense, Psyche! You can’t just switch cutie marks! That’s physically impossible!” Crystal said.
“Maybe she’s at Fluttershy’s house. We should go check there.” Psyche suggested.
“Good luck with that. I checked Fluttershy’s house and Rainbow Dash is there with Fluttershy’s cutie mark.” Blaze said.
“For Luna’s sake! Nopony is making any sense today!” Crystal yelled. “You can’t switch cutie marks! How can you?”
“Do you know what’s going on, Blaze?” Psyche asked.
”You know as much as I do, Psyche, but all I know is that Rarity has Rainbow Dash’s cutie mark, Rainbow Dash has Fluttershy’s, Fluttershy has Pinkie’s, Pinkie’s has AppleJack’s, and AppleJack has Rarity’s.” Blaze explained.
”Then who’s does Twilight have?” Crystal asked.
“Twilight’s.” Blaze said.
“And who has yours?” Crystal asked.
“Me.” Blaze said.
“And who has Psyche’s?” Crystal asked.
“Mine is still mine last I checked.” Psyche said.
“What about me? Oh no, I hope I didn’t switch cutie marks with Engie! Last time I tried to build something, it backfired on me!” Crystal freaked out.
A cutaway shows Crystal building a catapult. She hops on top of it and holds the string. ‘Beep beep’ said the roadrunner, as it ran past Crystal’s catapult. Crystal pulls the string and the catapult just falls apart, and a giant rock falls on her. The rock rolls out of the way, and Crystal was flat like a pancake, and then her body goes up and down like an accordion. Yay! Accordion! The cutaway ends.
“Relax, Crystal. Your cutie mark is still yours.” Psyche said.
“Hey! Y’all got a problem with havin’ mah cutieh mark?” Engie complained to Crystal.
“I didn’t say that. I just didn’t want to chase that roadrunner anymore because a stupid coyote stole my job! Stupid cow!” Crystal complained.
“Well, good news is, I got my armor fixed.” Aqua said as he joined the group. “Bad news is, AppleJack made it worse, and when she resprayed it, they colored it the wrong blue.”
“But yer armor looks the same, partner.” Engie corrected him.
”Yeah, but this blue is slightly lighter than the blue this armor actually has.” Aqua said.
“Yer startin’ to sound like Flare. Picky of his own color!” Engie complained.
“Hey, speaking of Flare, where is he?” Psyche asked.
“Trust me, Psyche, I had just about ENOUGH of Flare yesterday!” Blaze said.
“What did Flare do yesterday?” Psyche asked.
“It was the day after he broke up with Pinkie. He was just sitting down at random places yesterday with a boombox singing Time After Time.” Blaze said. It was true, that was me yesterday.
A cutaway shows me sitting on my couch, carrying a boombox, and I started singing Time After Time with a sad tone: “Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick and think of you-” The scene then changes with me sitting down on one of the booths in my shop. “Caught up in circles confusion is nothing new.” Scene then changes with me sitting on the bar at the cider pub while Blaze plays pool in the background. “Flashback – warm nights – almost left behind…” Scene changes with me outside, sitting on a bench with Blaze standing behind me. “The second hand unwinds – If you’re lost you can look and you will find me.” Back at the shop booth scene. “Time after time… if you fall I will get you…” Scene shows me out in the Ponyville Lake while it’s raining. “I WILL BE WAITING – Time after time.” Back at the bench scene. “Time after time.” In Blaze and Rainbow Dash’s house, while I’m sitting on their bed at night, while they’re being annoyed by my singing, and they’re trying to sleep. “Time after time…. Time after ti-“ Rainbow kicks me off the bed, and I start whispering, “Time after time.” The cutaway ends.
“I couldn’t take much more of Flare after that, you know?” Blaze said.
“Blaze, Flare lost somepony near and dear to him, can’t ya just accept that?” Aqua asked.
“I accept it, Aqua! I do! It’s just, if he knew this was going to happen, why does he have to be all upset about it? Can’t he just move on with life?” Blaze asked.
“Hey, I understand him. I’d feel the same if I lost Thundy.” Crystal said.
“Hello? Crèmey? You in here?” I said while looking inside a mail box.
“Oh look, there’s Flare now!” Engie pointed.
“Crèmey? Crèmey?” I asked, looking side a plant plot and then behind a light post.
“Looks like he’s lookin’ for something.” Aqua said.
“Ey, Flare! What’s going on, partner?” Engie asked.
“Sorry, can’t talk now, Engie. I’m looking for Crèmey.” I said while looking inside a water bottle.
“Errr, ah don’t think she’ll be able to fit in there, partner.” Engie said.
“Hey, anything’s possible! It happened to me when I was getting chased by a couple of loan sharks.” I said.
A cutaway shows me getting chased by a couple of loan sharks. “GET OVER HERE, CRIMSON! YOU OWE US MONEY!” a the loan sharks yelled. It doesn’t help because I was right near the ocean. I mean, lots of loan sharks hang around there. The loan sharks that were chasing me were actually sharks. I stopped once I found a table with some table cloth, and a water bottle on top of it. Once the sharks got to wear the table is and said, “Hey! Where did he go?”
“Hmm, I wonder where Crimson is…. Is he…. DOWN HERE?!” the shark said once he looked under the table cloth, but I wasn’t there. “Hey! I just saw him right here! I thought he would’ve gone under the table?”
“He ain’t here. Maybe he hid in the ocean.” The first shark said, as the loan sharks started running towards the ocean. A pony walked by and opened up the water bottle on top of the table, and when he was expecting water to pour in his mouth, nothing came out. The pony started shaking the bottle, but then I just fell out from inside the bottle, and landed on him. Yeah, I was inside the bottle! Pretty cool, huh? The cutaway ends.
“So what happened to Crème? Why are you looking for her?” Blaze asked.
“I went to my shop this morning, and usually she sits there waiting for me, but when I got there, she wasn’t there.” I said.
“Maybe she just had gone late.” Engie assumed.
“I waited two hours for her, but it’s not like her to not come to work without calling me first.” I said.
“Maybe she’s got plans and her phone lines are down.” Engie guessed.
“I-D-K, brahs. I’ve looked all over for her, but I can’t find her anywhere! I’m starting to worry.” I said.
“Maybe she’s at your shop now.” Aqua assumed.
“Nah, I would’ve gotten a call from Lyra or Bonnie saying she’s there.” I said.
“Did ya check her house?” Aqua asked.
“Of course not! That’s the last place I would look!” I said.
“And why is that?” Aqua asked.
“Flare, it’s her house, you should’ve looked there first!” Blaze said.
“Why? She hates living in that dump! She only got that house so she’d live closer to my shop! She said she’d rather live inside my shop, but with that security system in there, the alarm will go off.” I said.
“Hey, to be honest, I’d be even happy living in your restrooms, they’re so darn clean!” Crystal said.
“Thanks, sista! I really want my bathrooms to be as clean as a hotel room.” I said.
“Last time I was in a motel room.” Crystal said.
“I said HOTEL, not MOTEL.” I corrected her.
“Nah, it can’t be HOTEL unless there are pimps there. I know it’s a MOTEL because it had yellow bartenders.” Crystal said.
“Look, I think it wouldn’t hurt if you went to check her house, Flare.” Blaze suggested.
“Alright, you guys go ahead and check.” I said.
“Uhh, why us? Why not you?” Psyche asked.
“I’ve been looking for her all morning, now it’s your turn!” I said.
“Nuh uh, you’re coming with us, Flare.” Psyche ordered me.
“Make me!” I argued with him.
“Your parents already made you, dude.” Crystal said.
“Look, Flare, if Crème isn’t anywhere else, it wouldn’t hurt checkin’ over at her place.” Aqua advised me
“And I keep telling you; SHE’S NOT THERE!” I said with an attitude.
“How do you know? You didn’t even check!” Psyche reminded me.
“I just know because that would be the last place she’d be in at the day time in lovely morning like this.” I said.
“You call this a lovely mornin’? It’s rainin’, hailin’, snowin’, and it’s hot at the same time!” Engie said, looking up at the checkerboard sky with the different weather patterns.
“Wow, the sky looks like the skybox in Minecraft.” Aqua said, looking up. Just then, a cardboard box fell from the sky and landed on Aqua.
“HA! A skybox! I get it!” Crystal said and laughed.
“How is it rainin’ boxes? That’s physically impossible.” Aqua said.
“C’mon, let’s just head over to Crèmepop’s house and see if she’s over there.” Blaze said. So the six of us went over to Crème’s house to see if she was over there. I wanted to do the Sheldon Cooper knock on her door, but once I done the first knock, the door slid open with a creaky sound.
“She was robbed.” I said.
“Now how would you know that?” Psyche asked.
“Her door was unlocked.” I said and then I played with the light switch, and the lights weren’t coming on. “Yep, she was robbed.”
“What you can tell by the lights?” Psyche asked. “It could be a power failure.”
“I’m pretty sure she was robbed, this place is a mess.” Aqua said.
“Oh no, the house was always like that.” I said.
“Hey what’s this?” Engie asked, looking at some sort of monitor with a radio on it.
“Looks like a communications station of some sort.” Blaze said.
“A communications station? Crèmepop doesn’t have a communications station.” I said.
“Then what do you think this?” Engie asked me sarcastically, pointing to the station.
“Looks like a radio, a microphone, and a TV with a bunch of little receivers and wires. Crème has all those.” I said.
“Yeah, but look how they’re set up.” Engie said.
“Crème likes to decorate her own way.” I said. Engie started messing with the dials and knobs on the radio.
“What are you doing, Engie?” Crystal asked.
“Tryin’ to broadcast a signal, maybe we can get something.” Engie said. “Hello? Hello? Anypony there?”
“Try turning on the TV.” Aqua suggested.
“Ah, good idea.” Engie said, turning on the TV.
“Hello there, it’s the Ray Promenade show!” Ray said as he appeared on the TV.
“Ray?” Aqua asked.
”Ah, hello Aquatic Armor! Good to see you again!” Ray said.
“What are you dowing, Way? Pwetend you don’t hear them, so they would think this is a TV show.” Steelhoof said.
“STEELHOOF?!” Blaze yelled.
“Will you guys get away from the screen? This is for Swinebutt is talk through.” Nickels told them.
“OFFICER PENNY NICKELS!?” Psyche yelled.
“Alright, somepony go get him!” Fonz instructed his peers.
“WHOA! I have no idea who that is.” Crystal said.
“That’s Fonz Punkskull!” I yelled.
“Yeah, hey Flare! How’s your sister?” Fonz asked.
“Fine, fine.” I nodded.
“Good.” Fonz said. “I kinda miss her.”
“Yeah, well, you ain’t having her back!” I said.
”Hmm, pitty.” Fonz said.
“Alright, here I am!” Swinebutt said and snorted as he walked to the screen. “Hello, Crimson!”
“What’s up, Swinebutt?” I asked as I started to chuckle after I said that. “That was awesome! What’s up, Swinebutt? How come I never done that before?”
“You don’t seem very dramatic right now.” Swinebutt said.
“What’s there to be dramatic about?” I asked.
“Uh, Flare. Swinebutt is on the monitor, Crèmepop is missin’, ain’t it obvious?” Aqua reminded me.
“I know, but how would you know if Swinebutt kidnapped her? There’s no proof.” I said.
“Actually there is.” Swinebutt said, turning the camera. “BEHOLD! Your kidnapped friend!”
“Consuela? You kidnapped Consuela?” I asked because the camera was aimed towards the Hispanic maid.
“Misser Swinebutt, we have no more Windex in HQ.” Consuela said.
“Sorry, turned the camera the wrong way.” Swinebutt said as he turned the camera again. “BEHOLD! Your kidnapped friend!”
”GASP!” I yelled as I saw Crèmepop was all tied up on a chair, struggling to get out. “CRÈMEY!”
“What are you trying to pull, porkchop?!” Blaze yelled at him.
”WHOA! No need to make offensive comments, Blaze!” Swinebutt said.
“GIMMIE BACK MY CRÈMEY!” I demanded.
“You want your Crèmey so bad? Come and get her!” Swinebutt said mischievously and then he laughed and snorted as he laughs.
“Alright, we will, and we’re gonna kick your flank too! NOPONY MESSES WITH MY FRIENDS!” I yelled.
“We’ll be waiting for you, Crimson!” Swinebutt said.
“Alright, I’m here! They online?” another Swinebutt asked.
“Wait…. two Swinebutts?” Aqua asked.
“Double the fun!” Crystal said.
“Hey, don’t steal Luna’s phrases, Crystal!” I instructed her.
“Seriously, Spy?” the second Swinebutt asked the first one, and the first Swinebutt turned back into Blue Spy.
“Sorry, boss.” Spy said.
“SPAH!” Engie yelled.
“Ok, I apologize for that.” Swinebutt said as he snorted. “Now, Crimson. We have kidnapped your-“
“Spy told me everything already, brah.” I said as I glared at him.
“Oh…. well, then I guess you already know what to do then! Come and get your marefriend if you want her so much!” Swinebutt said and chuckled.
“She’s not my marefriend! She’s just a very close friend of mine!” I corrected him.
“Whatever! We still have her and if you don’t come within the next three days, we’ll be forced to tickle her!” Swinebutt said and laughed evilly.
“TICKLE HER!? No, not tickling! Please don’t tickle her!” I begged.
“Then come and get her, Crimson! We’re waiting for you!” Swinebutt said mischievously. I activated my hornsaber and then I angrily slashed the communications station in half.
“Holy Wizard of Hope, THAT was annoying!” I yelled.
“Flare YOU IDIOT!” Engie yelled, bopping me on the head.
“OW! What?!” I asked.
“How are we supposed to find Crèmepop when we don’t even know where she is?!” Engie yelled.
“Oh….. right.” I said.
“Wow, that was a foolish move, Flare.” Psyche said.
”It didn’t cross my mind, I’m sorry!” I said.
“How are we supposed to know where to find him?” Aqua asked.
“Maybe I’ll go see Twilight; she’ll be able to help me out.” I said.
“Oh there you boys are!” Rarity said as she walked inside. “Hey, I need your help a bit. It seems… that I angered the town and I need some shelter until the heat dies down.”
“What did you do?” Engie asked.
“I don’t know! The townfolk must think the weather is too last season.” Rarity said as her voice began to echo. “Last season… last season… last season…” Just then, Rarity gains a flashback of last season when Discord was spreading chaos throughout the entire town, one of them being strange weather patterns.
“HA HA HA!” Discord laughed. “I have taught Rarity well!” The flashback ends.
I walked over to Twilight’s house, but I didn’t know whether to go home to get my umbrella, my winter scarf, or put on some sunblock because the weather was so weird today! I started knocking on the door to Twilight’s house when I got there. Knock, knock, knock; “Twilight?” Knock, knock, knock; “Twilight?” Knock, knock, knock; “Twilight?”
But it wasn’t Twilight that answered the door, it was Spike. “Hey, Flare!” he said, looking like he’s in a bad mood.
“Oh, my bad. I knocked for the wrong pony.” I said, and then I knocked on the door again. Knock, knock, knock; “Spike?” Knock, knock, knock; “Spike?” Knock, knock, knock; “Spike?”
“Yes, hi Flare.” Spike said with an annoyed tone.
“What’s your deal?” I asked.
“Oh, Twilight messed up big time, and now she won’t stop singing about it.” Spike complained as we both walked inside to sit down.
“Oh? What did she mess up on?” I asked.
“She messed with the Elements of Harmony and now all her friends got their cutie marks scrambled.” Spike said.
“Oh, right, yeah I saw that happen today. I wanted to go see Pinkie, but Fluttershy was at Sugarcube Corner making jokes.” I said. “I gotta say, jokes aren’t her thing.”
“Hey, Twilight’s the one that messed up, not me.” Spike said. We were quiet for a few seconds, and I heard Twilight singing upstairs, saying something about ‘one mistakes’ and ‘heart aches’, I don’t know why.
“Sounds like Twilight’s singing still.” I said.
“No kidding! This was the third time she sang today, and it’s not even noon!” Spike complained.
“Hey, as long as Twilight has adventure today that makes PERFECT SENSE and she takes as much time to think about solving her problem as possible, and she doesn’t instantly find a way to solve it and expect it to work like that, AND her reward for solving her problem is something that nopony would complain about, then I say, no problem!” I said.
“Well, for her and her friends’ sake, I hope you’re right.” Spike said. Just then, Spike started feeling a little sick, and he burps up a scroll.
“Does that ever hurt you?” I asked.
“Ehhh, not really. It did at first, but I’m used to it now.” Spike said as he picks up the scroll.
“Are you sure? Because when you burp up scrolls, I have the feeling it feels like vomiting.” I said.
Spike opened up the scroll, and read it. “Dear Flare Gun, Please come to Canterlot as soon as possible. I have found a clue for the whereabouts of your friend Crèmepop. Bring your friends with you. Your friend, Princess Luna.”
“Oh, well then. That’s going to be tough to choose.” I said.
“What is she talking about? What happened to Crèmepop?” Spike asked.
“Dr. Swinebutt hired some goons to kidnap her, and I don’t know where she is, and I have to find her in three days otherwise they’ll tickle her!” I said.
”Ooo, that’s bad.” Spike said.
“Now then, all I have to do is make a very tough decision.” I said.
“What’s the tough decision?” Spike asked.
“To figure out which friends I should bring with me to Canterlot.” I said.
“Why?” Spike asked.
“Luna said to bring my friends, but I don’t know which friends to bring. I have the Mane Six, I have the Noble Six, I have you, I have my employees, I have Addie, and I got some other friends that I don’t normally talk about.” I said.
“I… think she meant the Noble Six.” Spike said.
“Alright then, I guess I’m going to Canterlot with the Noble Six.” I said.
“Have a great trip then!” Spike said.
“Thanks, brah! Hey, let me know how things go around here. I hope Twilight solves this cutie mark problem.” I said.
“As long as she doesn’t instantly come up with a solution, and thinks that’ll actually solve it, then there’s nothing to worry about.” Spike said.
“Alrighty then! See ya soon, brah!” I said as I walked out of her house, and back into the random weather outside.
“Maybe I should go check up on Twilight. I hope she’s not giving up on her friends.” Spike said as he starts walking upstairs. “I hope she doesn’t sing another song 20 seconds from now.”
So I told the Noble Six about the news from Luna, so we headed over to Canterlot to see what she has in store for us. We waited in the Elements of Harmony corridor for Luna to appear. I just stood there looking at the glass windows that showed the stories of Equestria’s past. I was currently looking at the Crystal Empire one when Spike and Cadance saved the day.
“Yep. Great stories these are, huh Flare?” Aqua asked.
“They sure are, brah! They sure are!” I nodded.
“I’m glad Equestria is as peaceful as it is now. All because of these stories, it’s been safe ever since.” Aqua said.
“Yeah, I suppose….” I said.
“Is something wrong, mate?” Aqua asked.
“Is your jelly-baby meter down?” Psyche asked.
“It’s just…. we’ve saved Equestria a couple of times.” I said.
“Yeah, so?” Aqua asked.
“So why don’t we get our own window?” I asked.
”What do ya mean?” Aqua asked.
“Our own window that tells the story of how we saved the kingdom.” I said.
“Oh, well…. I don’t know.” Aqua said.
“Do they think we didn’t do much of a job protecting it?” I asked.
“C’mon, Flare. Who needs a stupid window anyway? We helped make the kingdom safe, and that’s all it matters.” Aqua said.
“I know, but…. it would be possum grade awesome if everypony saw us on these windows, and how we protected the kingdom from certain dangers, then we’d be famous! We’d be heroes!” I said excitedly.
“You don’t need a window to be a hero, Flare. The hero comes from within.” Blaze said.
“Yeah, like those alien movies when the aliens POP OUT of the character’s stomachs!” Crystal said.
“Thanks for that mental image, Crystal. I’m glad I ate a light breakfast today.” Psyche said.
“Noble Six?” a random guard that looks identical to half the guards in this palace asked us.
“Who’s talking?” Engie asked.
“The princesses would like to see you in the throne room.” He said. So we all headed to the throne room to see the princesses.
When we got to the throne room, the royal sisters were talking to eachother. “Why does everypony laugh or give me strange looks every time I eat a banana?” Celestia asked her sister.
“Princesses!” I said.
”Why do you always have to represent us, Flare?” Crystal asked.
“Ah, the Noble Six! You’re here! We’ve been expecting you!” Celestia said.
“No kidding! Luna sent me a letter saying you needed me.” I said.
“Technically, she gave the letter to Spike to give to you.” Psyche corrected me.
“Shut up, Psyche. You always have to prove yourself right, you know?” I complained.
“Sorry, it’s who I am.” Psyche said.
“So we overheard that your friend Crèmepop has been captured by Dr. Swinebutt; is that correct?” Celestia asked.
“You have to axe the obvious?” I asked.
“Well, my dear sister here has found a solution that might solve your problems.” Celestia.
“How can it be a solution if it MIGHT solve our problems?” Crystal asked.
“As you can see, the goons that kidnapped Crèmepop have traveled by plane to take her to the location she and Dr. Swinebutt are held.” Luna said as a projection screen came down in front of the thrones. “We found some security footage at the nearby Airport. A private jet transported the following ponies identified as Fonz Punkskull, Professor Henirch Steelhoof, Blue Spy, Penny Nickels, and Ray Promenade. They were seen carrying a brown sack that kept-“
“Hey look! The nose of the plane is on my hoof!” Crystal interrupted as she places her hoof between the projection screen and the projector.
Luna just rolled her eyes and continued talking. “They were seen carrying a brown sack that kept on moving; even made Fonz fall over. They even chased the bag one time and tried to push it inside the plane. Took them 20 minutes to finally get her inside.”
“Wow, Crème is a strong girl.” Aqua said impressively.
“The airport management was able to trace the plane and the plane landed over at Mareami International.” Luna said.
“So Crèmepop must be somewhere in Mareami.” Engie assumed.
“Do you know where?” Psyche asked.
“Sorry, Psyche, but that’s all the data we were able to obtain. Crèmepop and Dr. Swinebutt are indeed somewhere in Mareami; that’s the only fact we have.” Luna said.
“We have to rescue her! She’s a dear friend to me, and I will not let that piece of bacon terrorize her!” I yelled.
“I expect you all to move cautiously when finding her. There’s no doubt that Dr. Swinebutt has laid a trap for you all.” Celestia said.
“Celestia, I know what that pig is all about. I know his tricks; I know what he does to his prisoners! I’ll be able to defeat him, just like all the other attempts he tried to get me!” I said.
“Then we wish you all the best of lucks.” Celestia said.
“We got you seven tickets for the next flight to Mareami, leaving tomorrow.” Luna said.
“Why seven?” Crystal asked.
“Since Flare Gun is going home, I have no doubt his sister Water would want to come to.” Luna said.
“I don’t want Water to be a part of this rescue mission. She means a lot to me, and I wouldn’t want her to fall under Swinebutt’s hooves!” I said.
“I know, but it’ll save her from complaining.” Luna said as she winked at me, giving me the package with the tickets inside.
“Thank you, Luna! Thank you, Celestia! I promise that I will bring Crèmepop home, and then, I’ll bring Swinebutt into custody! I can’t take anymore of his schemes!” I said.
“Well, it looks like we’re going on another roadtrip then.” Crystal said, putting on some sunglasses. “HIT IT!”
Just then, the song Push It To The Limit starts playing in the background as the six of us start walking out of Canterlot and back to Ponyville. We start packing all the things we need, including some pool toys, towels, sunblock, money, but that’s our vacation stuff; we also pack a couple of things that we’ll need for a rescue mission, like I bring my trusty magic charger so I can recharge my magic faster, my walkie-talkies just in case we split up, some tracking devices so it’ll be easier to find eachother and because I think I’ll need it, and I’m bringing that little magical folded box with the polka instruments that Pinkie gave me, just in case. I finally installed my fish feeder, gave Water her ticket, but it was taken a while for her to go because she needed to find out which make-up she wanted to bring. I keep telling her this isn’t just a vacation; it’s also a rescue mission. My friend Crèmepop needs my help, and I must save her! Crystal wanted to do a little song so she made her own parody of Push It To The Limit, by Scarface:
“Push it to the limit!” Crystal sang. “Trot along the kingdom edge, but don’t guard down just keep your head, and we’ll win it! Further than the limit! Past the point of self-respect, we’re reaching the top, but we still gotta expect to unexpect iiiiit!”
“Here are to save the day, and get pancakes in the beginning of May and we choose our fate!”
“CHOOSE THE FAAAAAATE!” all my friends sang along, but not I; I was just thinking about Crèmepop. Wow… I really got over Pinkie fast.
“Going for the bed and bath and beyond, and maybe get some tea-cups for my friend Bon Bon, so close now we’re reaching the sale, so PUSH IIIIIT! OH YEAH!” Crystal sang.
As the instrumental was on, we headed over to the airport, went through the stupid annoying security station yet again, and waited to get our plane so we can head back to Mareami. We went inside the plane and got our seats. I was glad there were no annoying babies crying this ti- nope, I spoke too soon, and the in-flight movie was the Scooby Doo movie, which really ruined the plane ride for me. I went through my satchel and got myself a little book.
“What are you reading, bro?” Water asked.
“Nothing important.” I lied.
“Wait, a minute, this is somepony’s diary!” Water said.
I snatched the book away so she wouldn’t see. “Mind your own business, sis!”
“I can see the title in front of the book. This is Crèmepop’s diary. Why are you reading her diary?” Blaze asked.
“Because SHUT UP, that’s why!” I said angrily.
“You know, it’s wrong to read somepony’s diary, Flare.” Psyche said from the seat in front of me.
“Says the pony that READ MY DIARY, PSYCHE!” I reminded him.
“Ok, I guess I sort of deserved that.” Psyche said, sitting back down.
“Alright, but look at this, guys! Crèmepop has gone through a lot in her past just like me! Dear diary, I wanted to join the cheerleading squad, but they didn’t want me to join because I was so fat. A colt got the part over me! I mean seriously? A colt joining the cheerleading squad? Everypony laughed at me, and you know what else? This colt was six years old!” I said as I read the diary.
“Wow.” Water said.
“I know right?” I asked.
“Crèmepop was fat?” Water asked.
“I believe so.” I said as I continued reading. “Dear diary, I was called trash after I said I hated the most popular colt in school, and I was shoved in the garbage, and they kept me in there until I went to the dump! I was lost for days, finding my way home, but I didn’t know where my home was. I was lost in this big city, and I didn’t come home until 4 days later, and my family didn’t even give me a warm welcome. They thought I was at my friend’s house, but they didn’t know I didn’t have any.”
“Wow, her story is similar to yours, Flare.” Aqua said.
“Yeah…. but it sounds worse.” I said.
“So, no wonder she’s your marefriend, Flare!” Crystal said.
“She is not my marefriend, Crystal! I thought I made it clear before?” I reminded her, starting to get annoyed that everypony keeps calling Crème my marefriend. Just then, our plane finally arrived at Mareami. We then walked out of the airport, but before we went far, Engie stopped us.
“Oh no, guys!” Engie gasped.
“What happened?” Water asked.
“Luna forgot to give us a hotel!” Engie said.
“And that’s NOT where the bartenders are.” Crystal said.
“Well, that’s great! Now we have nowhere to stay!” Psyche complained.
“Oh fooy, Psyche! You guys can stay with us!” Water said.
“You want us to stay with you at your old place?” Psyche asked.
“Of course! We’re all friends! Our parents won’t mind you staying with us!” Water said. “That ok with you, Flare?”
“I don’t mind. We’re gonna be having our own little slumber party!” I said excitedly.
“Awesome! Crystal, it’s you and me; I’d want to you see my collection!” Water offered.
“Sounds like fun, Water!” Crystal said excitedly.
“So I’ll take the bags back to our place, Flare, and you guys can start looking for Crèmepop right now.” Water said.
“Ya don’t have to do that, Water.” Engie said.
“Oh it’s my treat! Flare won’t let me interfere anyway, so I’ll just take the bags back to our place, and you guys can start looking now.” Water offered.
“Sounds good!” Blaze said. “I’ll check the skies.”
“Before we split up, I got these-“ I was just about to say, but before I could continue, I see a volkswagon beetle go by. I punch Psyche in the arm and yelled, “BLACK ONE!”
“Ow!” Psyche yelled.
“So before we split up, I got these walkie-talkies that we should use.” I said. “Engie upgraded them before we left, so now they take long-distance. They’re city-range now.”
“Thank you, thank you!” Engie said as he bowed his head. “Ah also made these trackin’ devices for each of us. We put a piece of hair in the device and the device will tell us if we’re gettin closer or not.”
“Where did ya get Crèmepop’s hair from?” Aqua asked.
“From her hair brush, duh!” Engie said.
“So here’s the plan: Blaze will patrol the skies to see anything out of the ordinary. Engie, you take the Downtown area; Aqua, you take the northwest part of the mainland; Psyche, you check the northeast part of the mainland; Crystal, you’ll check city central; Aqua, you’ll take West Beach, and I’ll take East Beach.” I said.
“Wait, I wanted to take the beach!” Crystal complained.
“Trade?” Aqua asked.
“Sure!” Crystal said.
“Alright, I’m takin’ the city central then, and she’s takin’ beach.” Aqua said.
“Alright then. LET’S MOVE OUT!” I yelled.
“You do not have the makings of an army sergeant, bro.” Water said as she shook her head at me. The song isn’t finished yet, time to continue:
“Welcome to the limit!” Crystal sang.
“The limiiiiiit!” the Noble Six (excluding me) sang.
“Finding clues one step at a time! The power ball’s still playing so, we better win iiiit!” Crystal sang.
Throughout the time this song was on, the six of us looked high and low all day, trying to find the whereabouts of Crèmepop, but we did run into some accidents along the way, nothing worth talking about though, except for when Crystal was getting ice cream; she was afraid her hair would fall off just like Thundy’s, so she avoided it. Also Blaze accidentally crashed into a helicopter when he was flying. The helicopter was fine, but Blaze hurt himself as he splattered on there and the helicopter pilots just used the wipers to wipe Blaze off their windshield. Anyways, back to the song. “Bring it on the limit!” Crystal sang.
“The limiiiiit!” the Noble Six sang.
“With not a pony left to stand in our way! We might careless, but we’ll never be safe, if you feel iiiit! Feeling dat Mareami heat!” Crystal sang. “Something something the limit!”
“The limiiiiit!” the Noble Six sang, but Engie sang a little later than everypony else because he was distracted.
“Heading to the top of the cube!” Crystal sang. “Don’t sit there just gimmie some food, and you’d be fiiiiiiiniiiiiished! Welcome to the limit!”
“The limit, the limit, the limit, the limiiiiiiit!” the Noble Six echoed.
“Knocking over the limiiiiit!” Crystal sang.
“The limit, the limit, the limit, the limiiiiiit!” the Noble Six concluded the song.
And yeah, that was the song; you should know what’s after that. I’m glad Crystal was able to lead her own song for the second time. I led a lot of songs, and most Engie songs he sang were by himself, except for that one duet with Apple Fritter. Now we need Psyche, Aqua, and Blaze to sing their own songs. It was nearly sunset and still no sign of Crèmepop. “All units report in.” Aqua said on the walkie-talkie in a tired tone.
“Still nothing.” Crystal said on her walkie-talkie.
“Ditto, which sounds similar to dibs.” Engie said on his.
“We’ve been searching for her all day long. I think it’s about time we stopped.” Blaze suggested.
“NO! We have to find her! Swinebutt’s gonna tickle her the day after tomorrow!” I yelled.
“Hey, just like the movie!” Crystal said excitedly.
“Forget it, Flare. We’re all tired. It’s time we turned in.” Blaze said.
“No, brah! Crèmey’s in trouble, and…. if we wait…. I dunno, this city is really big, it’s hard to track her! Even with these little devices!” I said.
“Are you even sure they work, Engie?” Psyche asked.
“Of course ah’m sure! Ah made a million of them, and they worked! Ah even tested these!” Engie said.
“Flare, it’s no use. Crèmepop can wait until tomorrow, but ya just have to wait. I promise we’ll look again tomorrow.” Aqua said.
“I know what Swinebutt’s like, he may let her starve!” I begged.
“Speaking of starving, I sure am starving!” Crystal said.
“Please, Flare? We’re all tired, and we need our rest. I promise, the first thing tomorrow, we’ll look for her. You just need to be patient. She can wait. We’ll be able to save her, I know we will.” Blaze promised.
I took a deep breath, and sighed. “Sigh. Alright, brahs. We’ll turn it in for the night.” I said.
”THANK YOU!” Crystal said, feeling relieved.
“Hey, Psyche?” I asked.
“What?” Psyche asked. About that time, I was actually next to him and I punched him in the shoulder when I see another volkswagon go by.
“BLUE ONE!” I yelled.
“Ow! Quit it!” Psyche complained. “Let’s just go find a place for dinner!”
“Alright, but I’m choosing dinner!” I said through the walkie-talkie.
“Fair enough. Where would you like to meet up at?” Blaze asked. So we all met up at my favorite Mexicolt resturaunt; Ole Ole! I gotta say, they have the best chips and salsa there, and the most delicious chimi changas I ever tasted! Used to go there a lot when I was younger. If only Spike were with us, he’s been wanting chimi changas for a while now.
“Well snap, I gotta say Flare, those chips and salsa are the best, you are right!” Crystal said.
“Hooves down.” Aqua said.
“Well, I wanted to take you dudes and dudet here last time we were in Mareami, but you all didn’t want Mexicolt food.” I said.
“Well, ah certainly regret not comin’ here before.” Engie said.
“Just wait until our food comes! It is delicious!” I said just as a couple of familiar looking ponies start walking in from the front door.
“Hey, who are those dudes by the door?” Blaze asked. I looked back and took a look, and of course… how could I forget these guys?
“Hey, that’s… that’s the Friendship Mafia!” I said. I waved over to Poni Cipriani, the don, and he saw me, and started walking over.
“Well, well, well! Look who came back to town! How you all doing?” Poni asked, sitting down with us.
“We’re doing great, Poni! Good to see you again!” I said.
“You too, Flare! You too!” Poni said as he shook my hoof. “So what brings you here in Mareami? How can you be in town without letting us know first? Herb’s been wondering.”
“What, you gonna whack me?” I teased.
“Yeah, wanna be a wiseguy about it?” Poni asked glaring at me.
“Whoa, you mad bro?” I asked.
”Nah, just disappointed.” Poni said, patting me on the back. “Should’ve let us know you were back!”
“Sorry brah, but we’re here on a search and rescue mission.” I said.
“Oh? Who you searchin’ for, and rescuin’?” Poni asked.
“There’s this pony by the name of Crèmepop who’s a close friend of ours.” Crystal said.
“Uhh, close friend of MINE!” I corrected her. “You dudes never hang out with her.”
“Regardless of our relationship with her, it’s critical that we find her, and bring her to safety.” Psyche said.
“Well… maybe we can help you boys out.” Poni said.
“And girl.” Crystal added.
“Yeah,” I nodded, “I can’t believe I forgot about you guys. Herb promised that the Friendship Mafia would be able to help me in my time of need, and right now, I need the mob’s help more than ever.”
“Of course, my boy! We’ll help rescue your girl!” Poni said.
“Great!” I said excitedly.
“You have a picture of her?” Poni asked.
“Yeah, I have a picture of her on my phone, just gimmie a second.” I said, taking out my phone and trying to find her picture. “Wait I got a text message from Spike, he said Twilight solved the cutie mark problem.” I started texting my response to him. “That’s…. nice….. brah! Can…. you…. explain….. later?” I send the text and continued looking for Crème’s photo. “Oh Luna, he texted back!”
”Don’t read it then, man! Read it later!” Blaze suggested.
“Nah, I never leave a text hanging unless I’m REALLY busy, or I’m sleeping, or my phone is off.” I said, and then I started reading the message. “Sure thing, man. Where are you?” Then I started texting back. “I…. am….. at….. dinner.” I send the message, and continued to look for her photo, but then I got another text message from Spike. “For Wizard of Hope sake, brah!”
“Stop responding!” Psyche demanded.
“Spike is a fast texter!” I said. “Ok, here’s the picture of her- No, wait, that’s Fluttershy with cream of wheat all over her face, hang on.”
“I never thought it would take this long to look for a picture on my phone. I usually just save them on my computer and delete them off my phone, unless they’re important, or if I seen a hot mare on the street.” Poni said.
“Here she is! Her mane style looks a bit different then than now, because everypony kept confusing her with Fluttershy, so she made a humantail on her mane.” I said.
“Ah! Can you text me the picture?” Poni asked.
“I don’t have your number.” I said.
“Do you have Herb’s number?” Poni asked.
“Actually, yes I do. I dunno when I got it though.” I said, sending Herb Leafhorn, Jr., my old school bully that turned into my friend recently the picture of Crème, and explaining why he needs it. “Ok, so you mafia dudes think you’ll be able to help me out?”
“Of course, my boy! We’re the Friendship Mafia! We keep things peaceful around here, and if anypony in our streets has been kidnapped, then we’ll rescue them, and bring the kidnappers to justice.” Poni said.
“Actually, Crème got kidnapped in her house in Ponyville.” Engie said.
“Well, regardless, we’ll help you out!” Poni said.
“Ok, it was Dr. Swinebutt and his goons that kidnapped her.” I said.
“Ah, that rascal again? Alright, we’ll do our best to find them.” Poni said.
”Thank you, Mr. Cipriani! I promise I’ll pay handsomely for this!” I said.
“Hey, good deeds are its own reward, Mr. Gun!” Poni said.
”Might I ask? Why do ya call yaself a mafia, when ya do good deeds?” Aqua asked.
“I dunno, I just like that name; ‘Mafia’. Makes us sound badplot!” Poni said, and chuckled.
“Yeah, you got that, man! You got that!” I said and chuckled.
“Alright, chow!” Poni said as he walked out to get his own table.
“Isn’t this great, Flare? You got the mafia workin’ along side ya!” Engie said.
“I guess I should’ve axed for their help before. I keep forgetting I befriended them.” I said.
“That’s awesome, brah! With the mafia working by your side, we’ll be able to find Crèmepop in no time!” Blaze said. So our dinner arrived, and we all loved it! Except for Aqua; he got sick.
Afterwords all went back to my parent’s house, had a little chat with eachother, and had ourselves a little slumber party. We decided to have some fun, like watching a few movies together; Water showed Crystal her collection, and those two were having so much fun in the other room, having a little ‘girl time’. They were giggling a lot in there, we wanted to ease-drop on them, but they kept going quiet when they heard us near the door, and then they whacked us with pillows, and a couple of times, Water used her water magic against us. After a while went by, it was time for us to go to sleep. I was sleeping on my old bed as everypony else was sleeping in sleeping bags on the floor. Water and Crystal were sleeping in the other room, and Engie and I were planning to do a prank on them in the middle of the night, but it’s only midnight right now. All my friends were asleep, but not me. I was up, reading more of Crèmepop’s diary, seeing a lot of cool stories she made. I was laughing at a few, was about to cry on a few, and I even got to the part where it says she had a crush on me. Wow, I didn’t know Crème felt that way about me! I was quite impressed! I was blushing because most of the diary kept saying cute things about me; saying I’m the cutest pony she ever known, the funniest too, and she’d spend the rest of her life with me if she had to. I guess I was barking up the wrong tree this whole time! Crème was the one I was supposed to be with, not Pinkie! I eventually fallen in love with Crèmepop, and when we finally rescue her, I’ll ask her out on a date! I just got to the one of the more recent parts of the diary, and I started to frown. I eventually gasped! My heart started pounding, and a couple of tears fallen out of my eyes.
“I…. I don’t believe this!” I said to myself.
“What’s wrong, man?” Blaze asked.
“Blaze? What are you doing up?” I whispered.
“I heard you gasping. I heard you crying too. What’s wrong, man?” Blaze whispered. “Are you reading Crèmepop’s diary again?”
“Yes, but I found lots of content in here that I never known before.” I whispered.
“Like what?” Blaze whispered.
“Will you two SHUT UP?! I’m trying to sleep!” Psyche complained. We were both quiet for a sec.
“Let’s talk in the other room.” Blaze whispered. So Blaze and I got up, and we walked to the living room so I can explain what I discovered. “So what’s the problem, man?”
“I was looking through this diary, and I found out…. Crèmepop’s in love with me.” I said.
“Awww! That’s so sweet!” Blaze said.
“Yeah, but it gets better.” I said. “She says I’m the cutest, funniest, nicest pony she ever known and she’d want to spend the rest of her life with me.”
“That is so cute, man! I guess you’ve been barking up the wrong tree, huh?” Blaze asked.
“Yeah, I just said that.” I said. “I also said that during my Dare to be Stupid song. Dare to be stupid.”
“So, I assume you’ll be asking her out when we rescue her, huh?” Blaze asked.
“Well, you see man, that’s why I’m upset.” I said.
“What do you mean, Flare? You’re single again. You’re not going out with Pinkie anymore, so what’s the problem?” Blaze asked.
“The problem is….. I was the reason she’s gone.” I said.
“No you’re not, Swinebutt is!” Blaze said.
“Yes, Swinebutt kidnapped her, but she was planning to run away from home. She found out I was in a relationship with Pinkie, and it broke her less than three.” I said.
“Her what?” Blaze asked.
“Her heart.” I said.
“Ah, I keep forgetting what less than three meant.” Blaze nodded.
“So, Blaze, maybe this is what she wants. Maybe I shouldn’t rescue her. She doesn’t want me anymore it seems.” I said sadly.
“That is not true, man! You saw her in Swinebutt’s video feed. She was suffering in there. She NEEDS you, man! You’re her prince charming!” Blaze said.
“Ok, shut up with that prince charming garbage, brah! Unlike Rarity, this isn’t a fairytale for me, capieche?” I asked.
“I understand, but my point is, Crèmepop needs you. You should give her what she wants. She wants you to date her, man! If this is what she wants, then ol Flare Gun’s gonna give it.” Blaze said.
“You’re right, brah! You’re absolutely right! I have to be the one to rescue Crèmepop!” I said.
“Yeah, and we’ll help!” Blaze said.
“Yeah, exactly! You take care of Swinebutt’s goons for me.” I instructed him.
”Yeah, and then you’ll date that girl!” Blaze said.
“Yeah, and then we’ll have an ice cream eating contest when we get back!” I said excitedly.
“Maybe….” Blaze said.
“Aww, so Crèmepop IS your marefriend after all, bro! That is so sweet!” Water said as she stood from the hallway.
“SHUT UP, sis! Mind your own business!” I yelled throwing a pillow at her.
“So? You weren’t minding your own business when you were ease-dropping on Crystal and I!” Water said, winking at me.
“Shouldn’t you be in bed?” I asked.
“I was gonna ask the same thing.” Water said.
“I’m doing some important research right now.” I said.
“Yeah, reading the diary of your future special somepony is TOTALLY important!” Water said sarcastically, rolling her eyes, and she started laughing.
“Angry face!” I growled at her.
“Calm down, bro.” Blaze advised me as he held my shoulder. “Save your anger for Swinebutt. He’s the one that you should be mad at.” For once, Blaze was right. Heh, yeah for once! Yeah that’s what I said! So we went to bed. Engie and I slept over the prank we were planning, but don’t worry about it, we needed our much needed rest. It was 8 in the morning, and I heard my phone’s text message chime go off. My text message chime was pretty loud; I sort got my volume to go up a bit. Plus the phone’s vibrate was on, and it shook my nightstand, causing a loud noise to wake me and Aqua up, since Aqua was the closest to my nightstand. I looked at the text message, and it was from Herb Leafhorn, Jr. It said; ‘I have found the location of your marefriend. Meet me at the stadium at 10:30.’
“STOP SAYING SHE’S MY MAREFRIEND!” I yelled which woke everypony else up. So we all woke up, my dad made us some breakfast, and I went to the stadium alone. Over at the stadium, there was a practice Nashorse race going on. Saw my favorite racers go by, including Jeff Gorspeed who waved at me. I looked over at the section that Herb is suppose to be in, and I walked over. “Sup brah?”
“Sup, brutha from another mutha?” Herb asked giving me a bro-hoof.
“Not bad, not bad! I didn’t know you liked Nashorse too!” I said.
“Yeah, it’s pretty much my favorite sport event I like to watch.” Herb said.
“Wow, I should’ve hung with you more in school.” I said and chuckled.
Herb chuckled along. “Heh! Yeah man, for sure!”
“So I got your text message.” I said.
“Yeah, no duh! Why else would you be here? Trying to get a sale on Pony Stewert hats?” Herb asked sarcastically.
“Heh! Yeah, along with some Jimmy Fastson bobble heads!” I said and we both laughed.
“Yeah, I remember getting in a fight with one kid trying to get a foam finger and brah, things really got tough!” I said.
“Uhh, dude…. that was me.” Herb reminded me.
“Oh…. really?” I asked.
“Yeah, really.” Herb said.
“Oh, well then, sorry that I won the finger.” I said.
“Yeah, man. Too bad it was the last one.” Herb said.
“Well, you couldn’t have one anyway, you know why?” I asked.
“Why?” Herb asked.
“Cause I’m NUMBER ONE!” I said.
“HA! Yeah, for sure man, for sure!” Herb nodded.
“Where’s Angel and Annabelle?” I asked.
“They’re getting things set up. I wanted us to bond a bit, so that’s why I asked you here.” Herb said.
“So, do you know where Crèmepop and Swinebutt are?” I asked.
“Yes, I needed to meet you here because I wanted to give you a few stuff that would help ya out.” Herb said.
“Alright, but first tell me the location.” I instructed him.
“Aww, I wanted to give you the items you needed first.” Herb whined.
“Alright, do that.” I said.
“Nah, I’ll tell ya the location first.” Herb said.
“Well- MAKE UP YOUR MIND, BRO! You say one thing and then you agree with me, and then you say another thing! Why do ponies do that?” I asked.
“I dunno, man.” Herb said.
“For Wizard of Hope’s sake, man! You’re crazier than birds that like to hang out in outside restaurants!”
A cutaway shows a couple of pigeons waiting around at a fast food joint that has tables only outside, and they were waiting for ponies to throw food at them. “Alright! This is the perfect spot to get free food, dawg!” one of the pigeons said.
“Awesome! So what do I do?” the second pigeon asked.
“You just wait. Sometimes ponies throw fries at us, so we can eat them!” the first pigeon said.
“They do? They just give them away!” the second pigeon asked.
“I know, homie! It’s crazy, isn’t it?” the first pigeon asked.
“Wow, you two bums are sad; you need to get jobs.” Big Bird said as he walked by. The cutaway ends.
“So the location that your friend is hanging out in is in the Magic World theme park.” Herb said.
“My friend? Swinebutt ain’t my friend.” I corrected him.
Herb laughed. “I wasn’t talking about him!”
“Yeah, I know! I’m weird!” I said.
“Yes you are!” Herb said.
“So how you know he’s there?” I asked.
“It’s pretty obvious. Swinebots are all over the park. His family actually owns the theme park.” Herb said.
“No way!” I said shockingly.
“Yeah way!” Herb nodded.
“Well, this makes things a little more difficult. I never thought I’d be fighting my worst enemy over at my favorite theme park. Especially if it’s a place, where they say, is where dreams come true.” I said.
“Well, the world is full of surprising unexpected things, my friend.” Herb said.
“Sure is, Herb. It sure is.” I nodded.
“So the items you’ll need are in this package.” Herb said, giving me a package. “Six tickets are inside already, for you and your friends. They’re V.I.P. passes though, so you can be able to cut the lines.”
“Don’t I need scissors to cut the lines?” I asked.
Herb laughed. “Enough with the jokes, man! This is serious!”
“Uhh, hello? Have you just met me, and this crazy, but here’s my number, so call me maybe? I’m never serious, man!” I reminded him.
“I figured.” Herb nodded. “I heard your Engineer friend is a hacker. Maybe it’ll be easier if he was around to help hack the security systems around the area.”
”I wouldn’t want to hack anything. What if the rides shut down? I don’t want the other guests around the park to affect with what me and my friends are up to.” I said.
“Trust me, unless we’re going to our last resort plan, then no guests should be affected by what we’re up to.” Herb said.
“But wait, what do you mean ‘last resort plan’?” I asked.
“Me and the mafia will help you out. Just in case you and your friends get captured. What you’ll need to do is try to turn on the park’s alarm systems. That’ll give the signal for all of us to come in and rescue you, but to be safe, this should stick as a stealth mission. The last resort plan is if we have no other choice.” Herb said.
“So regardless, this mission will be successful?” I asked.
“If you’re able to turn on the alarms in the park, then yes.” Herb said.
“Alright, let’s do this!” I said, giving him another bro-hoof.
“Yeah, let’s pop! Make like a tree, and get in there!” Herb said. So I went back home to pick up my friends and we all took a bus ride over to the Magic World theme park bus station. Water came with us too, I dunno why. The seven of us met up with Herb and his guys hiding outside the park.
“Crimson Flare Gun and his new friends!” Annabelle said excitedly.
“Yeah, man. We ready to clean the streets, man?” Angel Heartstrings asked.
“You know it!” I said.
“What’s Water doing here?” Herb asked.
“She followed us here. I tried to stop her, brah. I really did.” I said.
“I wanna help, bro! Don’t leave me alone at home with MOM! Crèmepop is my friend too, and I want to help out.” Water said.
“Just to let ya know, mate, there’s only six tickets for us.” Aqua reminded her.
“Can I just stick with Herb?” Water asked.
“Ok Water, you could stick with Herb, but STAY with him.” I instructed her. “Herb, keep an eye on my sister. She is to remain with you at all times.”
“I’ll do my best, bro.” Herb said. “I mean, I’m not the brightest pony around. I met your sister before, she could be quite clever.”
“Yeah, we all know how that feels, partner.” Engie nodded.
“Hey Herb, I see your cutie mark is a baseball bat. What does that supposed to mean? Are you good at sports?” Crystal asked.
“Nah, I just like whackin’.” Herb said.
“Wow… judging by your past, I’m not surprised.” Psyche said.
“Well, that was how it originally was. Now I just whack haters. It’s my job.” Herb said.
“Does the mob always rely on violence?” Blaze asked.
“It’s more of a last resort thing.” Herb said.
“Yeah, you and your last resorts, huh Herb?” Engie asked.
“Alright, so we know the plan, right brahs?” I asked my friends.
“Here, to make sure the swinebots don’t recognize you. We got you some disguises. Swinebot scanners aren’t as… umm… good, as you may think.” Herb said.
“Good? That’s the best word you could say? Not as ‘affective’?” Psyche asked.
“I’m not good with big words, man.” Herb said. “My dad did not raise my right.”
“How are things with the battle against your dad, man?” Blaze asked.
“Terrible.” Herb said.
“Terrible? Does he keep defeating you?” Crystal asked.
“In a way, he does.” Herb nodded. “For every time I have to fight him, it’s always a defeat for me. Regardless of me winning or losing the fight, I always feel like a loser when fighting him.”
“Wow, that’s deep, man.” Blaze said.
“Anyways, time’s a-wasting.” Annabelle said.
“Yeah, man, we gonna do this thing, man?” Angel asked.
“Yes. So you six better get going. Remember the plan, alright?” Herb asked.
“You got it, Herb!” I said.
“Be careful in there, Flare!” Water warned me.
“We’ll be fine, Water.” I said.
“You two, Aqua!” Water warned him.
“Thanks, Water.” Aqua said.
“Ok… I’ll be here with Herb awaiting your arrival with Crèmepop by your side.” Water said.
“Wow, and she doesn’t even wish the rest of us luck.” Crystal complained. So the six of us all went over to the restrooms to change into our disguises, and then we walked up to the park entrance.
“Alright, so we’re disguised as Magic World visitors. We need try to find where Crèmepop and Swinebutt are hidin’.” Engie said.
“This sounds like fun! We’re going into a theme park for free!” Crystal said excitedly. “Best part: V.I.P.! We get to cut in lines! Makes riding the rides a lot easier!”
“Yeah, but we’re not here to have fun, Crystal. We’re here to rescue Crèmepop.” Aqua reminded her.
“I know! But riding the rides WHILE looking for Crèmepop! Makes this mission fun, at the same time useful!” Crystal said.
“Alright, so we’re heading inside.” I said. “The plan is: We use our tracking devices to look for Crèmepop. If we find out the location, do not provoke without backup. We can’t let an ambush stop us. We have to work together!”
“Sounds good!” Blaze nodded.
“And in case of an emergency situation, we have to turn on the alarms so the mafia can move in and support us.” I said.
“Why can’t we just pull the alarm now?” Crystal asked.
“Because we don’t want the rest of the visitors in this park to be concerned of what’s going on. We want them to still have fun around here. Remember, this is mission is between us.” I said. “That also means, you can’t ask anypony for help unless it’s eachother, or Herb and his gang. Herb is outside the park right now, keeping an eye on things. He’ll radio in if he sees anything out of the ordinary. But don’t ask anypony for help!”
“Why not? We can just go to the information booth for help.” Crystal said.
“Because, if they know we’re after Swinebutt, they’ll tell him, and they’ll lock down the park, and send out the swinebots in the park after us.” Engie explained.
“Exactly! So we’re all splitting- RED ONE!” I yelled as I punched Psyche in the arm when another volkswagon drove by.
“STOP DOING THAT!” Psyche yelled.
“So, we’re all splitting up. Crystal, you check Adventure Land, Psyche you check Future Land, Blaze you check the skies of course, Engie you check out Redneck Land, Aqua you check out Fairytale Land, and I’ll check out Circus Land.” I explained.
“Redneck Land? Really, Flare?” Engie asked in an insulted tone.
“Yes, really. Now, without further ado. Let’s go rescue Crèmepop!” I said.
“Sounds good! Let’s move out!” Blaze yelled as the six of us all went inside the park to go look for Crèmepop.
“You watch out Swinebutt!” I said to myself. “I’m coming after you! You too, Crèmepop! I’ll save your life and then I’ll give you that date you wanted! I should’ve done it before, Crèmey! I’ll find you!” I started looking around the theme park for her. As we were all looking, I wanted to sing a little song. It’s a parody of Summer of 69 by Bryan Adams! Isn’t he a talented singer? He is, isn’t he? It goes like this:
“I got my first loyal employee, found her eating a lime. Was in needed of a lot more help, this was Ponyville October 29.” I sang as I tried looking for Crème. “Me and Lyra and Bonnie, were working together and we tried real hard. Then I saw, this pretty pink and white mare, I knew she would help me get real far. Oh when I look back now…. I saw her eyes staring at me forever…. and if I had a choice…. Yeah I’d always wanna see them! Those were the best days of my life! HA-HAAAA! Uh huh!”
As I was singing, and my friends were looking for Crèmepop, Engie ran into a little trouble. One of the robots saw through his disguise and grabbed him, and took him into an Employees Only section. Looks like Engie was caught! None of us noticed though. I wasn’t the only one singing though. As Crèmepop was held, all tied up in Swinebutt’s HQ, she sang along with me like we were having a duet together, but we had no idea!
“Ain’t no use complaining, when I had a job to do.” Crème sang. “Spend my evenings down at your pizza shop…. and that’s where I got attracted to you, yeah!”
We both started to sing together, and with the help of digital effects, the two scenes we were in were fused together among a while cloud background. “Standing in front of the pizza shop door…. you told me you’d wait forever…. oh we’re both from Maream… I knew it would be now or never! Those were the best days of my life!”
“HA HA-HAAAAA!” I shouted. “Oh yeah!”
“Back in October 29!” we both sang. Crème was still rotting in her pen and we all were still searching, but as we were doing so, Aqua fell in a trap door and we lost touch of him. “Man we were killin’ time,” we both sang, “we were just stuck in the friendzone… I guess plain friendship don’t last forever….. forever, no!”
Crystal was riding the rides this whole time, but when she was riding Pirates of the Equesterian sea, the raft floated to a restricted section of the ride and we lost touch with her next.
“And now the times are chargin,” we both sang, “look at everything that’s come and gone. Sometimes when I think about you, I should’ve dated you, but it all went wrong!”
We both then sang together again; “Standing in front of your pizza shop door…. You told me you’d wait forever….” Psyche suddenly gets grabbed by a hook and we lost contact with him. “Oh we’re both from Maream…. I knew it would be now or never! Those were the best days of my life!”
“RAH HA HA-HAAAAA!” I shouted.
“Back in October 29!” we both sang again. “Ooooh, back in October 29!”
“Oh yeah! Back in October 29!” We both kept singing ‘October 29’ during the ending parts of the song, but while the song was concluding, Blaze gets shot down by a tranquilizer dart. The song ended there, and as a refresher, I wanted to hear how my friends were doing.
“Report in, brahs!” I said from my walkie-talkie, but nopony responded. “Hello? Brahs? Crystal? Engie? Psyche? Aqua? BLAZE?! WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?! Why aren’t you responding?!”
“How is everything, man?” Herb asked from the walkie-talkie.
“Herb, I lost contact with the others!” I said.
“I see. You need some help?” Herb asked.
“No… not yet, but I need you to stay there, and keep watch on stuff. I think they might be captured.” I said.
“But you haven’t been captured yet.” Herb said.
“I know…. I think I might be falling into a trap. I’m heading over to the back isles of the park. The tracking device is going strong right now, but the signal is showing below ground! I think Crèmepop is right through here.” I said.
“Alright, but be careful, Flare! If this is a trap, you might need some help.” Herb said.
”Let’s just stick with the plan, brah. I push the alarm, and that’s when you come in with the others.” I said.
“Ok, I understand. Be careful down there. If it’s underground I might lose contact with you.” Herb said.
“Understood! How’s Water doing?” I asked.
“She’s complaining on how expensive the food is around here.” Herb said.
“25 bits for a treeburger?!” Water shouted. “And this isn’t even a combo!”
“Regardless, she’s still here and safe.” Herb said.
“Good. No matter what happens, you are not to enter the park until I push the alarm, understand?” I asked.
“You us mobsters say capiche, not ‘understand’.” Herb reminded me.
“Whatever. Over and out.” I said as I put the walkie-talkie. I entered one of the back lot buildings and I walked on downstairs. The signal to my tracking device is getting stronger. I know now that I’m getting very close to Crèmepop! I know I must take care of Swinebutt too, but I have to get Crèmey to safety before I think about anything else. I wanted to call for her name, but I didn’t want the guards to see me. In fact, there weren’t ANY guards at all! I was all alone when I was walking through the corridors. I saw some security cameras and I know they see me, but nothing’s going on. No alarms, no guards, no anything! There were signs that led to a prison area and all the doors on the way there were unlocked. I knew now I was walking myself into a trap! I had to warn Herb!
“Hello? Herb? Come in, Herb!” I said through the walkie-talkie, but there was no response. “Herb Leafhorn, do you read? I’m inside the base and the signal to Crèmepop is getting even stronger now, but I think I’m running myself into a trap. If you don’t hear from me in the next 15 minutes, send help without the alarm! Did you read that? Herb? Come in, Herb! Herb?” There was no response at all. I was too deep underground; I must’ve lost signal. I had to be prepared, so I was charging up my horn and I got it ready for anything that might pop out. I was feeling a little scared, but my love for Crèmey now was so strong that I couldn’t let anything get between her and me now. I know I violated her privacy, but reading her diary made me realize she was the real pony for me. Just then, I heard screaming coming from the corridors to the east.
“CRÈMEY?!” I yelled. “I’M COMING CRÈMEY!” I started running through the corridors really fast trying to find where the scream is being held. The signal to Crèmey was EXTRA strong now; the device was beeping REALLY FAST! The device said that Crèmey was just through the door to the right of me. I opened it up and I went inside. It was dark in there. I shot a few flares so I can see what’s going on. Once I went inside, the door SLAMMED SHUT behind me, and a spotlight turned on and there Crème was in front me! “Crèmey!”
“Flare! NO!” Crème yelled.
“I’m here to get you out, Crèmey! I’m sorry for putting you into this! I’m here to get you out!” I said.
“NO, FLARE! IT’S A TRAP!” Crème yelled.
“It’s a trap? That’s Admiral Ackbar’s line!” I reminded her.
“NO! RUN, NOW!” Crème yelled.
”WHAT?!” I yelled, but I was too late; I was whacked in the back of the head by somepony. I dunno who, but I had the feeling it was Fonz whacking me on the back of the head with a baseball bat. Before I passed out, I kept hearing little blurry voices, yelling my name. I knew it was Crèmey that was yelling them, but I couldn’t do anything, and I passed out helplessly.
TO BE CONTINUED….