“This is all your fault.” Chrysalis declared flatly.
Celestia, ruler of the sun, co-empress of Equestria, mentor to the Element of Magic, snorted in disdain. “I beg to differ,” she replied in the same passive tone.
Chrysalis reared her gigantic head, throwing Celestia to the ground. “My fault?” the Changeling queen snapped. “My fault? Who was it that decided to abandon all common sense and charge into a creature covered in holes?”
There was a soft rapping on the towering doors, silencing the two rulers. "Um, your highness?" a tinny voice whispered. "How's it...Going in there?"
"Just peachy," she muttered. "Thank you for your consideration." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the Changeling queen snort.
"Oh... Just yell if you need anything, my princess." it answered meekly. Celestia groaned from her spot on the glass floor.
“Who was it that decided to crash my poor niece’s wedding, unleash a disgusting army upon Canterlot, and attempt to weasel all of the love out of Equestria?” Celestia spat. Carefully planning every movement, she struggled to her hooves until she was at eye level with Chrysalis.
The hatred in the Changeling’s eyes was so intense it could have been concentrated and fired at Equestria’s most dangerous enemies. Just a few minutes prior, the Changeling queen had returned to Canterlot, unarmed and alone, to chat with Celestia and Luna to declare defeat against the pony civilization. She was calm, collected, the absolute pinnacle of royalty as she marched, head high despite her misgivings, until she had passed the guards and entered the grand courtroom. After a series of unfortunate events, both alicorn ruler and Changeling empress found themselves ensnared in one anothers horns.
Celestia felt a shiver run down her spine, watching in awe as Chrysalis’ luminous eyes began to pulsate with uncondensed fury, an unholy glow emanating from her slitted pupils. The idea of Chrysalis squashing the almighty Princess like a mindless mosquito was very real.
The Changeling queen scoffed, dramatically throwing her head back. She didn’t need to look back at her foe- the clatter of regalia against glass told her everything she needed to know. “All I wanted to do was get a stupid treaty signed so the ambassadors would get off my back! You’re the one who freaked out and attacked!” she exclaimed.
“I was protecting my subjects! How did you even get in here?!” Celestia roared from within her mane. When Chrysalis glanced down at her tormentor, all she saw was a mountainous, billowing cloud of cerulean, turquoise, and magenta. She couldn’t help but giggle.
“Changeling, dear Celestia.” Chrysalis cooed, shaking her plot submissively. “By the way, you may want to lay off the cloud cake, dear. It does nothing to help your figure.”
“I’ll have you know this is the slimmest I’ve been in 1,000 years!” Celestia countered, thrashing wildly.
The Changeling queen fell with a sharp screech and a loud bang, landing in a heap next to the alabaster alicorn. Miles away, in the upper district of Canterlot, hundreds of purebred dogs began barking.
“Delusional, I see.” Chrysalis choked out between chortles, emerald tears beginning to trickle down her face. “No wonder they invented a new measurement system- the old one was too small for you!”
Growling, Celestia threw a hoof at Chrysalis’ exposed abdomen, grinning like a maniac when her opponent let out a fearsome wail. “Take that, you hideous b-”
“My princess, I heard shouting in the corridor!”
Freezing, the bickering rulers turned towards the voice. A lanky, tall Solar Guard decked out in armor too large for his frame stood in the threshold, his turquoise pupils as large as saucers. His hooves trembled as if he was in the epicenter of an earthquake as two of the highest figures of royalty in the world stared on.
“...Is there something I should know about?” he whimpered, his eyes never leaving Chrysalis’ twisted figure. She gave a halfhearted wave, shooting daggers at Celestia.
“No, mister....” Celestia clucked her tongue, her mind drawing a blank. Subconsciously, she took note of Chrysalis’ green tears making their way down her back.
“Monty, my liege, " he answered dully.
“Of course!” Celestia chortled. “I knew that, right, Chrysalis?”
Chrysalis snorted.
“Are you certain, your majesty? Isn’t this the same Chrysalis that attempted a siege on Canterlot naught a week ago? The same Chrysalis that defeated you at Princess Cadance’s-”
Princess Celestia’s body burst into flames, her eyes twin orbs as bright as the sun and her horn a magnetic pole of sunlight, pulling forth all cosmic magics and energy and funneling them into her psyche. With every passing second her scalding body blistered Chrysalis’ dark chitin armor, and although the Changeling let out a ear-piercing scream that vibrated the very air from Canterlot to Appleoosa, the sovereign alicorn showed no sign of stopping her intergalactic crusade for celestial, paramount power.
“WE DO NOT EVER MENTION THAT EVENT IN THIS CASTLE, MISTER MONTY!” Not-Celestia roared, her heavenly voice transcending the sound barrier and space itself. Alien lifeforms turned their heads as she spoke. “DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!”
The overlord of the sky and everything beyond it sent a wave of enchanted fire at Monty, lighting up the glass tiles in a sudden flash of scorching heat. Monty leaped back, his gilded hoofboots falling into the blaze, flattening himself to the wall. He whimpered sadly, watching the flames engulf the courtroom with tear-filled eyes. Although he felt the divine power of his overlord burning his fur, he said nothing and waited for the end to come.
“DO YOU?” Not-Celestia questioned the now charred pony, the magics- both good and bad- behind her horn threatening to burst. Mercilessly she began picking away at the stars and supernovas, sucking them into her vortex with no hope of revival. In the back of her power-hungry psyche, Celestia knew that if she kept breathing in the forces of nature there were serious consequences- the breaking of Earth’s rotation, an eternal eclipse of the sun, even the disappearance of oxygen from the entire country. Celestia, however, did not like to look at the glass half-empty.
Chrysalis, sizzling nicely, opened her mouth in a soundless wail, fixing Monty with a look of pure despair. The Changeling was surprised the castle hadn’t burst into flames yet, but she was sure of two things- that it would look like a Fourth of July celebration on steroids, and that she wanted to be as far away as possible when it exploded.
Feeling the heat, Monty spread his long legs in an attempt at a defensive stance. He opened his mouth, sensing snippets of Not-Celestia’s power float about the courtroom, and readied himself to take a huge breath of sweet, sweet air. Monty swallowed a mouthful of smoke and fell to the ground, gesticulating wildly.
“Oh, come on!” Chrysalis croaked, lapsing into a coughing fit.
“DO YOU?!”
From the ground, Monty nodded weakly, his vision swimming. Not-Celestia’s powersurge reached its apex, and, with a great screech, she exploded.
Technicolor ponies trotted past Chrysalis at the speed of life itself, laughing demonically, singing their siren songs, staring at the Changeling queen with unblinking, white eyes. A squadron of rainbow-clad pegasi with wide smiles raced above her head, vanishing into eternity within seconds. A feeling of intense peace washed over her, and despite the dire situation, she smiled. Everything would be-
The air was sucked violently from Chrysalis’ lungs as she was catapulted into the air, sailing through space, the wind at her back her only guide. Tiny pinpricks of light flashed before her eyes as her seemingly weightless form transcended the problems of mere mortals and took on the trials of immortals. Knowledge poured into her psyche like chilled lemonade into a waiting glass.
“I know... Everything.”
When Queen Chrysalis opened her eyes, her surroundings were drastically different from the dreamscape she occupied only a few moments ago- she was lying on her back, all fours in the air, on a strangely warm floor. The spacious room was completely black and stunk of solar fumes and medium-rare Changeling. She craned her sore neck toward the charred threshold, sending a concentrated strike of pain up her spine. By the threshold- or, what Chrysalis supposed had been the threshold- was a lanky guard pony with scuffed armor and serious burns curled into the fetal position, a small plastered across his face. Even from the far side of the room, the Changeling queen could faintly hear the chorus of “Winter Wrap Up.”
She attempted to raise her aching head, but a sudden weight on her horn stopped her in her tracks. An unconscious Princess Celestia, her horn charred and her tongue lolling on the floor, lay in a heap next to Chrysalis. One hoof, her normally pristine white fur stained with magics beyond anypony’s control, was spread across Chrysalis’ frame. The queen felt a spark of heat rush to her cheeks, and a strangled squeak escaped her jaws.
Chrysalis glared at the offending object that bound her to Equestria’s co-ruler- the uptight, prissy, know-it-all alicorn Princess Celestia. One of the few ponies who nearly foiled her plans at invading the equine civilization. One of the many ponies who were not in favor of her return, no matter what the conditions. Her normally active solar-powered mane and tail were still, their colors muted.
Chrysalis moaned softly, watching helplessly as Celestia shifted her hoof every so slightly and the edges of her pained face lifted into a smile. Through the quiet of the courtroom, Chrysalis could hear nearly everything within the castle’s walls, including the shouting of Solar Guards and their stampeding hooves.
“Where did you last see Private Monty?” A gruff voice barked just outside the courtroom’s gilded doors. “Whaddaya mean you can’t find him?! I was certain he was supposed to be coverin’ the Solar Courtroom!”
As if on cue, a literal swarm of Solar Guards, some not even fully clothed, burst into the destroyed courtroom. At the head of the miniature army was a mountainous, well-rounded stallion with enough gold on his body to bankrupt Saddle Arabia. He lowered himself to the blackened floor, eyes narrowed, wings taut, when his magenta eyes came across a most unusual sight.
Queen Chrysalis of the Changelings chuckled loudly, the heat of over a hundred pairs of scrutinizing eyes just as uncomfortable as being chucked against her will into the unbridled rage of an alicorn goddess. She shuffled her legs, hoping and praying Celestia’s hoof would fall away, but the Princess only whimpered and brought the Changeling closer into her impromptu embrace.
“This...” Chrysalis sputtered. “...This isn’t what it looks like?”