Chapter 2: RE-Training
Basic Infantry training was slow and awkward for Chalkboard. She was recruited from civilian life because of her extensive knowledge of Equestria’s military history and served briefly in the Imperial Armored Corps as the driver of a Type S1E9 Medium Tank. She became fast friends with Tanky and Smartmouth after meeting them on the obstacle course. After the obstacle course came the most difficult part for her, physical training. The seemingly endless days of push-ups, mile long runs and weight lifting damaged Chalkboard’s morale. She didn’t complete the tasks as well as her comrades, in fact, she failed many of the physical tasks she had to do. Her friends ensured her that the training wasn’t a test or evaluation. Instead it was to measure improvements over time. Chalkboard had noticed that her average number of push-ups had increased given that she’d never had any physical training before. She also saw that Tanky had trouble at first too. Though she went through basic training, Tanky had never done any infantry training which took its toll on her. Of course Tanky responded to the various aches and pains that training inflicted on her by eating more than usual. Chalkboard could remember the night when the cooks burnt the hard crackers, making them more like bricks than food. Tanky took the entire company’s hard crackers and ate them all like they were untoasted bread. Smartmouth had already endured infantry training so she completed the courses with flying colors.
Chalkboard and Tanky both benefited from Smartmouth’s experience and in turn, Tanky and Smartmouth received an education on armored warfare during their free time. As time went on, both Chalkboard and Tanky saw their scores improve drastically, Smartmouth’s scores on the other hoof, improved by a nearly unnoticeable margin. In December, the recruits were allowed two weeks of leave for the holidays. Chalkboard and Smartmouth stayed in Canterlot while Tanky went home to Stalliongrad to be with her family. Chalkboard asked Smartmouth why she didn’t want to go back to her family to which Smartmouth replied that if she went home, she’d only be able to spend less than a day with her family given how long the trip would be. Hearth’s Warming Eve in Canterlot was the highlight of Smartmouth’s stay in Canterlot because of Chalkboard’s tours. Chalkboard and Smartmouth became well acquainted with each other during their two weeks in Canterlot.
Those two weeks moved by quickly and before they knew it, January 8th had arrived and it was back to infantry training. The recruits received ERAD uniforms and patches that day as well. The dull golden yellow of their uniforms contrasted with the royal blue of their trims and white shoes. This week was different however, as the schedule Applejack posted for their daily routines showed that the recruits would have to endure less infantry training and that they would begin training with firearms. Applejack took her recruits to an open field about a kilometer away from Canterlot. There was a firing range set up with paper targets. Smartmouth and Tanky were ecstatic about the new firearms that were displayed in front of them while Chalkboard only looked concerned.
Tanky, without even receiving proper instructions from the quartermaster, took a Cinnamon Anti-Tank Rifle (CATR), loaded it and put a fourteen millimeter bullet down range. The 14x114mm cartridge threw Tanky onto her back before she could blink. The quartermaster was impressed by how such a small Earth Pony could wield the cumbersome rifle as the CATR was taller than Tanky. He was even more impressed about how she hit her mark dead on despite only having experience with tank sights. Tanky remarked about how if she knew infantry could equip a CATR, then she would have joined the Imperial Infantry Division.
Chalkboard, having no experience using firearms other than a pistol, performed predictably badly. She couldn’t control the recoil on a Neighjing Consortium Automatic Rifle (NCAR) and almost sprayed the entire company if it weren't for Chief Applejack’s tackle. Smartmouth and several of the recruits that were infantry, displayed their skills admirably. Smartmouth herself liked the NCAR herself but noticed that the model the quartermaster brought out was a Type S4E1 and not a Type S3E5. The 7.75x60mm rifle cartridges of the NCAR were more powerful than Smartmouth was used to, but she adapted.
Over the course of a few weeks, Chalkboard became a decent markspony. She excelled with the Wind-Jester Model-5. The small 9x30mm cartridge made the Model-5 a easy rifle for her to handle. The quartermaster later equipped her with the same Model-5 that she used in training. She was baffled that the Royal Guard equips their soldiers with weapons they seem to show proficiency with. It wasn’t the fact that Chalkboard received her own Model-5 that baffled her, it was the fact that Tanky was equipped with a Torque Type S1E2 Recoilless Rocket Anti-Tank Weapon. Tanky carried her treasured “Boomstick” everywhere with her until she was able to holster it on her VKV Heavy Tank-5.
By the time firearm training was complete, every recruit knew how to handle a gun as well as the average infantry pony. Several recruits wondered why they were being trained as infantry and wondered if they were asked to join the right Royal Guard division. Their doubts were finally put to rest on March 10th.
March 10th, 8th year of the Age of the Princesses
Corporal Chalkboard
20th Equestrian Royal Armored Division, Cadence Company.
Chalkboard watched as Smartmouth sighted the Type S2E20 50mm gun. She hoped that the lessons she gave about tank gun sights stuck to Smartmouth.
“Have you found your range yet Smartmouth?”
“Yes, one hundred and fifty meters.”
Chalkboard could tell that Smartmouth was having quite a bit of trouble operating a tank weapon. She decided to give Smartmouth a break as this was her first time actually operating a tank.
“Alright, I think I got it Chalkboard.”
“We’ll see when you pull the trigger.”
Smartmouth felt nervous. She gripped the trigger tightly as she ran the steps she took to sight the gun through her mind. She took a deep breath and pulled the trigger.
*click*
“Huh? Maybe I didn’t pull the trigger hard enough.”
*click*
Smartmouth let out a small grunt.
*click*
*click*
*click*
“Okay... something’s not right with the firing pin.”
Chalkboard smiled a little as she knew what the problem was. “Oh I’m sure you’ll figgure it out sooner or later.”
“Well can you at least help me?”
“Then what would be the point of training if I held your hoof all the way through it?”
Sergeant Steel Lance, a veteran of the 20th Equestrian Royal Armored Division, was observing the new recruits and helping them with their training. He happened to be walking by Smartmouth and Chalkboard’s Little Trapper tank destroyer when he heard Smartmouth frantically clicking the trigger.
“Is your gun loaded lassie?”
Smartmouth fumbled with the breech for a bit and finally got it to open. She blushed when she discovered that there was no shell inside of the gun. She pick one up slowly, inserted it into the gun and slowly buried her face with embarrassment into the sights.
“Don’t worry lass, you’ll get the hang of it eventually. Maybe one day you’ll make a fine loader.” chuckled Steel Lance as he walked away.
“How long did it take you to figure out that the gun wasn’t loaded Chalkboard?..."
“The first time you pulled the trigger.”
Smartmouth let out a sigh and pulled the trigger. The prominent THUD and the recoil made by the Little Trapper’s 50mm gun startled Smartmouth a little. “Boy... it’s so different actually pulling the trigger...” She looked back down the sights again to see her mark was a little off center.
“Your aim is pretty good for a first timer Smartmouth.” said Chalkboard as she turned the Little Trapper to the left.
The Little Trapper’s engine made various putting noises as it traversed.
Smartmouth started to aim her gun at the new target. She trained aiming the gun a little higher than the center of the wooden target. She let out a sigh as was about to pull the trigger before Chalkboard interrupted.
“Ah, ah, ah. You’re forgetting something.”
Smartmouth felt her cheeks turn red again. She lifted another 50mm shell from the ammo rack next to her and slid it into the gun. “Bah... there needs to be a dedicated loader...”
“We can only fit two Ponies in this tank you know.”
“Clearly, we need to be in a bigger tank...”
Smartmouth pulled the trigger. The loud thud and recoil still made Smarmouth jump a little. She peered back into the sights and saw that her shot was closer to center than before.
“Don’t worry about the little inaccuracies Smartmouth. Only the Porshoe guns can hit dead center every time.”
“What’s the point of this tiny tank anyway? I mean my shoe is bigger than this tank.”
“The Type S1E3 is a light tank destroyer. The small size makes it really hard to spot, especially with a camouflage net and paint.”
“What’s the difference between tanks and tank destroyers anyway? I mean don’t they all do the same job?”
“Well tanks are meant to do is spearhead an attack ahead of advancing infantry. That means they engage both enemy infantry and other tanks. A tank destroyer is specifically made to take out enemy tanks and nothing else.”
“But what about the machine guns on some of the tank destroyers? Couldn’t tank destroyers do the same job as regular tanks?”
“Well most of our tank destroyers don’t have turrets, like this guy, it’s be pretty hard to engage enemy tanks at close range.”
“Pfft. Any tank can be good at close range if the crew is good enough.” interrupted Tanky.
“Aren’t you supposed to be helping the recruits with no experience Tanky?”
Tanky pointed at the Little Trapper that she was operating. The tank destroyer had flipped over.
Chalkboard was stunned. “How did your recruits manage that?”
“I don’t know. One minute I was teaching him how to drive the tank and the next thing I knew we were upside down.”
“That’s got to take some skill...”
“Well enough about my recruit, what about yourself Smartmouth? How’s tank training treating you.”
“Well... I haven’t gotten to the driving phase yet.”
“She just learned that the gun was empty and she tried pulling the trigger a whole bunch huh Chalky?”
Smartmouth couldn’t help but blush again. “Hey! I only forgot once!”
“You almost forgot the second time too.”
“Ah don’t worry Smartmouth, I had the same problem as you did.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Only the instructor actually took off points from my test.”
“Ouch.”
“Yeah, but there’s no point in feeling bad for it now. Besides, I think you should try driving now.”
“Driving?”
“You think she’s ready for it Chalkboard?”
“Well she does seem to shoot well enough. Do you think you’re ready Smartmouth?”
“Alright, I’ll leave you girls to it. Looks like they flipped my tank over anyway. Good luck Smartmouth.” Tanky walked back to her Little Trapper and began to explain the first rules of driving.
Chalkboard got out of her seat and began to instruct Smartmouth on the basics of driving. “So right here is the clutch, that’s the break and the one of the left is the gas.”
“Okay, that seems pretty self explanatory. What does this do?”
“Those are the steering sticks, left one for the left tracks and right stick for the right tracks.”
“And what about this thing?”
“That’s the “stick” it changes what gears so th-”
Before Chalkboard could finish, Smartmouth accidentally stepped on the gas pedal and the Little Trapper was upside down before she knew it. Tanky saw the whole thing and couldn’t help but laugh.
“HA HA! NICE! I knew you had it in you Smartmouth!”
Smartmouth was stunned on how the Little Trapper could flip itself. She also understood why the the tiny tankette was called the “Little Trapper”.
“Umm... Help? Anypony out there? I’m stuck! I’m also upside down and it’s really cramped in here.... How in the world can a tank flip itself anyway?”
“Well the Type S1E3 Little Trapper uses the same engine as any other tank made by the Neighjing Consortium.”
“And what does that mean?”
“It means this little guy runs on twelve hundred horsepower.”
“WHAT!?! Why does this thing need twelve hundred horsepower?”
“Don’t ask me, I’m not the one who designs these tanks.”
Tanky trotted over to see the damage. The Little Trapper was overturned, but otherwise unscathed.
“You okay in there Smartmouth?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for asking Tanky...”
“Alright, I’ll go grab one of the instructors and they’ll get you out on no time.”
“Hurry please! I’m getting dizzy with all this blood rushing to my head.”
“Gotcha. Chalkboard, just make sure Smartmouth doesn’t do anything that would put her in any harm and anything that would make the tank move. I’ll meet you girls in the cafeteria since training is almost over.” And with that Tanky dashed off to grab one of the instructors.
“Put the gear into “park” Smartmouth, that way the tank won’t move around all that much.”
A small clunking noise resonated out of the small openings from the overturned tank.
“I think I got it Chalkboard.”
Steel Lance walked over to inspect the overturned tankette. “Looks like another recruit stepped on the accelerator too hard again. Alright! We need the crane over here!” Steel Lance got on his knees and stuck his head inside the overturned Little Trapper. “Good thing this tank destroyer isn’t fully enclosed huh private?”
Smartmouth was incredibly uncomfortable in her position. “I don’t see how it would have made a difference...”
“Well considering that you’re lying on nice soft dirt and you could have hit your pretty head on really hard steel lassie. Now be a good lass and hold on”
Smartmouth frantically looked around for something to hold onto but before she knew it, the Little Trapper was starting to lift into the air. She gracelessly slid out of the driver’s seat and flopped onto the ground below. “OOF”
Steel Lance chuckled a bit before extending a hoof to help her up. “Clearly driving isn’t in your skill set lassie.”
Smartmouth groaned a little and took Steel Lance’s hoof. “Yeah and I’m a pretty mediocre gunner too.”
“Don't be so down Smartmouth!” interrupted Chalkboard. “At least you CAN hit something.”
“When you remember to load the gun lassie.”
Smartmouth felt her cheeks blush again, only this time there was no way to hide it.
Steel Lance let out a chuckle . “Well aren’t you just adorable lassie. It’s quite alright though. You’re probably going to become a tank commander anyway given your history lass.”
“And I assume you’re teaching these skill for a reason” said Smartmouth as she straightened her skirt and wiped the dirt of her uniform.
“Indeed lass. You, along with every member of the Royal Armored Division must learn the basics of the various tank occupations in the event that one of your crew member sustains an injury that prohibits them from performing their role.”
“Oh... I see.”
“Well seeing how you managed to hit those targets and you finally learned to load the gun I’d say you’re on the right track lassie.”
“Heh. Thank you sir.”
“Who knows? Maybe you’ll be able to be my “wingpony” some day.” said Steel Lance as he walked away.
Smartmouth’s cheeks flushed with red again. “And what’s that supposed to mean sir!?!”
Chalkboard was laughing at Smartmouth’s apparent ease of embarrassment. “Two days in the Royal Guard and you’ve already got yourself a suitor Smartmouth.”
“I don’t understand how a creep like that managed to get into a command position...”
“Ah, he’s just playing with you. Come on now, Tanky’s waiting for us.”
- - -
March 12th, 8th year of the Age of the Princesses
Corporal Chalkboard
20th Equestrian Royal Armored Division, C Company.
Chalkboard peered out of her Porshoe M-75’s sights.
“Twenty degrees right gunner!”
“Yes Ma’am!”
The 75mm gun roared to life and the shell towards the target. A resonating SPLAT followed.
“Confirmed hit.”
“Good shooting Far Shot!” Chalkboard turned her head to the left to see a Type S1E5 driving circles around Smartmouth’s M1-75. “Fifty two degrees left! Load HE then a AP! We got a Manticore!”
“Yes Ma’am!” shouted Far Shot and Carry All.
Carry All loaded a 75mm High Explosive round into the gun, grinning all the while. “GUN LOADED!”
Far Shot began to lead his target, careful to not shoot his ally’s tank. “Come on now... it won’t hurt all that much.” He pulled the trigger, sending an “HE” Shell into the Type S1E5’s tracks.
*SPLAT!* The Type S1E5 came to a screeching halt ,its left track was stuck to the ground with a sticky green goo. It was now directly in front of Smartmouth’s tank which wasted no time planting a 75mm flour round into the Type S1E5’s turret.
“Thanks for that Chalkboard!”
“No problem Smartmouth!”
“Red Team’s Type S1E5 Bombar is dead’r than a limp troll in a university forum!” announced Commander Applejack.
“Wait... did the Commander say the MT-2 we shot earlier was knocked out?” Asked Far Shot.
Chalkboard’s eyes widened a bit. “Quick! Fifty two degrees right!”
“Oh man! He’s got us sighted!” Load faster Carry!
Carry All quickly loaded the AP shell, but Far Shot was staring down the 65mm gun of Red Team’s MT-2 by the time his M1-75’s turret traversed to face the MT-2.
“We’re dead...”
But just as Far Shot had given up, a round from Smartmouth’s Tank impacted the MT-2 and threw its gunner off, causing the 60mm paint shell to miss Chalkboard’s tank.
“I assume we’re even now Chalkboard?”
Chalkboard wiped some sweat off of her forehead. “Oh yeah... we’re even now.”
“Red Team’s MT-2 and Blue Team’s Type S1E5 are outt’a action ya hear!?!”
“Alright lads! I need you all to rally at point B5! We need to regroup otherwise Red Team will surround us!” Steel Lance’s charge was initially successful but it got his platoon stuck in a sticky situation.
“We would have been fine if we hung back at H7... sir” Grumbled Smartmouth.
Steel Lance chuckled a bit. “If we hung back we would have gotten flanked by their Type’s. At least out here we met on equal ground lassie.”
“But we lost our MT-2 sir.”
“It was an accident, Private Hub drove that tank into a ditch.”
Smartmouth let out a small sigh. “Please tell me we’re going to hold this position until the rest of our team can advance.”
“That’s a negative” interrupted Corporal Plow. “The rest of our team is under heavy fire from at least nine of Red Team’s tanks.”
“Wow! That’s more than half of their team at H4! Lads! We’re in a bloody brilliant position to flank the enemy!”
“But we only have four tanks sir!” cried Smartmouth
“Bah, you’re still thinking like an infantrypony there lassie.”
“I fail to see how infantry tactics can’t be applied to armored warfare sir.”
“I never said tommy tactics can’t be applied to armored warfare, I was pointing out the flaw in the fact that four tanks are different than four infantryponies lassie.”
“He does have a point there Smartmouth. Four tanks can easily take on a higher number of tanks. It really depends on the model of tanks we’re up against.”
Smartmouth felt defeated and let out a sigh. “Very well then, lead the way sir.”
“Now that’s the spirit lassie! Tally-ho gents! Follow me and keep in tight formation!”
Steel Lance’s Type S1E5 lead the way with Smartmouth and Chalkboard rolling along the left and Plow’s VKV-Medium Tank 2 trundling on the right.
“Watch your sides, the map says that there’s going to be several ditches and steep hills in this sector.”
“Thanks for the heads up Plow.”
“Just don’t flip your tank again Smartmouth and we’ll be fine.”
“Hey! I’m not driving now aren’t I?”
Chalkboard let out a quiet giggle. “You weren’t driving yesterday either.”
“Oh come on! My tank got blasted by a VKV-Heavy Tank 1! It was going to flip!”
“Sure lassie.”
“Guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...”
The area that Steel Lance’s platoon started moving through was thick with brush and vine. Visibility is near zero with all the twigs and leaves obscuring the viewports. The smell of crushed pine and the morning fog added to the distractions.
“Alright lads, enough chatter, sight your guns and watch your flanks. Plow, can you get me a update on our position lad?”
“Uhh... If my map is correct we should be in H4”
“Hmm... Alright lads, take it slow and steady, I don’t want any bloody surprises in this ”
“Negative sir.”
“Corporal Smartmouth, keep your gun loaded lassie.”
Chalkboard let out a small giggle. “I think you’ve made your point, more than enough sir.”
“Ung.” Grunted Smartmouth. “Come on now! We have to find those tanks, otherwise our “flanking” attack would be a pointless move given that we had a perfectly good hull-down position at B4.”
“Those buggers must be here.” Steel Lance looked around and spotted a small hill towards the edge of the forest. “Driver, get us onto that mound.”
“Yes sir!” Sharp Turn maneuvered the Type S1E5 onto the mound, crushing several bushes on the way up. The snapping twigs and splattering mud hid a dangerous truth though.
Suddenly, Smartmouth screams over the radio. “Sergeant! You got a tank to your immediate front!”
When his Type S1E5 came to a stop on the mound, Steel Lance peered out of the view ports and saw six of Red Team’s tanks. “Yeah! I see them!”
“No sir! There’s a tank to your front!”
“I see them lassie!”
“No sir! You don’t understand! There’s a tank to your immediate front!”
Unbeknownst to Steel Lance, a TD-3 was hidden in the heavy foliage his tank started rolling through. It was situated in a niche carved out of the mound Steel Lance’s tank was on. He stuck his head out of his tank’s commander cupola and looked down at the front of his tank.
“Oh... bugger... Gunner! Max depression, five degrees right! ”
The 60mm gun on Steel Lance’s Type S1E5 put a paint shell right on the TD-3’s roof.
“Red Team just lost their TD-3 ya hear?”
Smartmouth spotted a MT-2’s commander on Red Team soon after Steel Lance took a shot. “We’ve been spotted! Gunner! Fifty degrees right!”
“I have a name you know...”
“I’m sorry if I don’t remember your name given the fact that we were all just assigned together in this tank!”
“Look, it we really are going to have to work together then I expect you to call me by my-”
Smartmouth’s tank shook violently as a paint round truck it. The tank Shartmouth spotted before had turned its turret and planted a shot on the M-75’s front armor.
“Red Team has lost another MT-2 and a M-75”
Tanky’s voice roared over the general frequency. “Oh come on! Blue Team’s M-75 isn’t out! I planted a shot square on the front!”
“The KO spell ain’t triggered yet so Blue Team still has a M-75”
Smartmouth quickly realised her situation. “Alright, I promise to learn your name later but can you please turn the turret fifty degrees right and shoot at that MT-2?”
“The name’s Hoggish... but not like anypony cares...”
“Scheiße... Zat’s because no vone does care! Now shoot zem before ve’re hit again!”
“Alright Hoggish...” groaned Smartmouth. “Would you please... just shoot that tank?”
Chalkboard knew she had to interject. Tanky’s crew must have reloaded by now and the other tanks in her platoon were already in battle. She felt the shaking of her tank as a shell flew out of its gun. “Far Shot! Left twenty five degrees!”
“Target sighted!”
“Gun loaded!”
“Fire!”
The paint shell splattered all over Tanky’s turret.
“Red Team just lost another MT-2 and a Type S1E5 ya hear?”
Chalkboard saw Tanky burst out of her commander’s cupola and shout; “Oh come on!”
“Alright lads let’s move north! There’s bound to be another attack!”
Chalkboard was curious as to why Smartmouth’s tank just sat there. “Smartmouth? what’s going on in there? Are you guys okay?”
She waited a bit but there was no answer.
Steel Lance noticed that Smartmouth’s tank wasn’t moving either despite his orders. “What in blazes is going on with you lass?”
“I wasn’t able to achieve contact either sir.”
“Well what the bloody hell could possibly be going on in there?”
“I don’t know but I have a pretty good idea sir. Trail.”
“Yes Ma’am?”
“Give Smartmouth’s tank a little bump.”
“You sure? From the sound of things I need full on ram them.”
“Well it’ll wake them up that’s for sure.”
“So you want me to floor it?”
“No, just enough to get Smartmouth’s attention.”
“Flooring it is then.”
“No! Wait Trail! Wait!”
Chalkboard’s tank lurched forward and plowed into Smartmouth’s M-75. The front idler wheels began to ride up on Smartmouth’s tank before Trail Blaze stopped the tank.
Smartmouth began yelling over the intercom. the only discernable words coming out of Smartmouth’s end were the words; “What the hell.”
“Now lassie, calm down. We just wanted you to know that we won the battle here and we’re moving on.”
Smartmouth took a moment to look around and noticed all of Red Team’s knocked out tanks. She knew that they had won as Tanky was jumping up and down furiously on her MT-2. “I’m sorry... My gunner and I were having a small disagreement...”
“Well you’re going to have to set those aside lassie, we have to move north to fortify our northern flank.”
“Blue team has lost a Type S1E5, a M-75 and a TD-3.”
“Alright lads! We need to move! Lassie, tell your gunner to stow it and let’s move!”
“The name’s Hoggish... not like anypony cares...”
Chalkboard’s M-75 kept a good distance from Steel Lance’s Type S1E5 while Smartmouth and Plow were bundled together. Their tanks trundled through the forest up to A6 where the northern flank was. When the platoon reached the northern flank, they found that their team was barely holding back Red Team’s push.
Chalkboard immediately started calling out targets for her gunner. Smartmouth on the other hoof, once again was engaged in an argument with her gunner over his name.
“Smartmouth look out!” cried Chalkboard as one of Red Team’s M-75’s took aim at Smartmouth’s idle tank.
The M-75 knocked out Smartmouth’s tank with relative ease given that nopony could concentrate.
“Blue Team has lost a M-75 and a TD-3”
Chalkboard gave herself a facehoof and sighed. “I knew Smartmouth was bossy, but she’s really going to have to work out those issued with her gunner...:
“Target hit. A tank is only as good as its crew, right Boss?”
Chalkboard sighted another tank, thirty degrees to the left. “Yeah... but in this case I assume that gunner Smartmouth has is no good... Thirty degrees left”
“Then how did the guy get into the Royal Guard if he was “no good” Ma’am?
“I don’t know.” Chalkboard braced herself a little when the recoil of the gun jolted the tank. “Maybe he’s here on accident?”
“Well crazier things have happened Ma’am...”
“Red Team has lost two MT-2s and Type S1E5.”
Chalkboard looked to the left even more and saw that the remaining tanks on Red Team’s Assault began to retreat.
“Red Team’s combat strength has been reduced to thirty three percent! Ya’ll better kick it inta high gear Red Team! Oh wait.. Red Team lost four VKV MT-10 and a Type S1E5! Blue Team wins! Now ya’ll can climb outta yer tanks while we retrieve them fer tomorrow’s match.”
“Well lads... aside from a certain commander’s inability to command her tank... you all did very good today.”
“Thank you sir!” replied Chalkboard and Plow.
Despite Steel Lance’s snide comment, there was no reply from Smartmouth who was still arguing with her gunner.
Chalkboard and her crew emerged from their M-75. The smell of fresh air and the warmth of the afternoon sun were a luxury as opposed to the musty and stale air inside of the M-75.
“Commander Applejack? So what exactly happened to the last of Red Team’s tanks?” asked Chalkboard as she climbed onto Smartmouth’s tank.
“Well... yer teammates on the southern flank got tired of wait’n and charged forward. They got lucky as the last of Red Team’s tanks were head’n ta yer position and them Red Team tank got ambushed.”
“Wow... did we luck out.” The closer Chalkboard got to the hatches of Smartmouth’s M-75, the louder the voices inside the tank grew. She knocked several times on the hatch with no response. Chalkboard placed her ear to the hatch and could hear plenty of yelling on part of every member of Smartmouth’s crew, but she couldn’t tell what anypony was saying.
“Is everything alright in there Chalkboard?” asked Steel Lance.
“No... they’re arguing again.”
“Well you might want to jump off the tank.”
Chalkboard turned to see Steel Lance’s Type S1E5 pointed in the her direction. She quickly hopped off of the Smartmouth’s M-75, scurried a little ways away and watched as the Type S1E5 drove into Smartmouth’s tank.
“What was that all about!?!” Yelled Smartmouth over the intercom.
“If you and your gunner are done yelling at each other lass, then you are to report back to base for debriefing.”
“Oh... we’re done?...” Smartmouth hung her head in shame for a bit. “Look... I’m sorry I didn’t contribute as much as I could have...”
“Well the time to apologize is quite over lassie. You and your crew would be dead if this was a real fight. Now come on lass, back to base.”
“Yes sir.” and with a salute, Smartmouth walked back to the campsite used to house the recruits while they were undergoing live tank training. Smartmouth walked back with Chalkboard and Chalkboard never heard the end of Hoggish’s antics and complaining. The journey was long and full on complaining on Smartmouth’s part but after about twenty minutes of walking, Chalkboard and Smartmouth reached the encampment where they found Tanky, grumpy as ever.
“What’s up with you Tanky?” asked Chalkboard.
Tanky let out a small sigh. “It’s nothing much. Only the fact I could have turned your little flanking attack around if I had a tank with a bigger gun...”
“Well at least you didn’t have to deal with an incompetent gunner who wouldn’t shoot the gun unless you agreed to learn his name... ung...”
“Heh... I think I got you beat there Smartmouth. I got two hippie loader who I can’t whip into shape.”
“Hippie loaders?”
“They always say “like” every two syllables... AND they’re really slow to load... they keep talking as if the shell was a living thing....”
Smartmouth couldn’t help but giggle a little bit. “Okay... okay... I know my gunner is bad but two loaders that are as slow as you say... how did they get into the Royal Guard?”
“The commander that had them last must have hated them enough to recommend them into the Royal Guard.” grumbled Tanky.
“I know it might be rude of me to ask, but can you talk like they do Tanky?” asked Chalkboard.
Tanky immediately widened her eyes and started to speak like her loaders. Every time she said the word “like” she cocked her head from left to right. “Like, Commander... like could you like, chill out bra. Like you’re seriously being, like a stick in like, the sand.”
Chalkboard and Smartmouth had to lean against a pole to keep them up while they laughed.
“Oh man... my gunner isn’t nearly as bad as those guys” said Smartmouth as she wiped a tear from her eye.
“If you ladies are done laughing till the cows come home, Ah have yer reviews here.”
The three girls snapped to a line and saluted at the same time.
“Ah’ll start with you Chalkboard.”
Chalkboard felt nervous. She could feel her heart pounding and sweat starting to form on her neck.
“Ya handled yer tank and crew fine and ya were will’n ta sacrifice yer tank for yer teammates in commendable. Well Ah got noth’n much ta say as yer already an experienced tanker.”
“Thank you ma’am.”
“Now fer you Smartmouth.”
Smartmouth felt even more nervous than Chalkboard did and it showed. She swallowed a bit and faced Commander Applejack.
“Ah understand that ya had problems regarding yer gunner?”
“Yes Ma’am.”
“Well we ain’t getting any new recruits soon, what’s this recruits name again?”
“Private Hoggish Ma’am.”
Applejack flipped through the roster a few times. “Hmm... that’s interesting... there ain’t no Private Hoggish on the roster...”
Smartmouth cocked her head to her right. “Really?” asked Smartmouth in astonishment. “How did he get into the Royal Guard if he isn’t on the roster?”
“That’s the funny thing ya see? Ah don’t remember him at the first day of recruitment either... Ah’ll have ta look in it later.. Anywho, Ah expect ya ta work it out between yer gunner. Yer platoon can’t afford mistakes like those in tha field ya hear?”
“Yes Ma’am.” said Smartmouth as she gave a salute.
Applejack walked over to Tanky, but there was something different about her. Tanky seemed more frustrated than anything. “Private Tanky, ya did-”
Before Applejack could finish, Tanky interrupted her. “I would have done better if my tank had a bigger gun on it...”
Applejack was surprised by Tanky’s revelation. She raised an eyebrow at Tanky’s statement. “Really? Ah would have thought you’d blame it on yer loaders given how you were talk’n some mighty mean smack ‘bout them.”
“Oh no, they’re decent at their job. It’s the fact that they say “like” every few seconds...”
“So why do ya think that you’d do better with a bigger gun sugar plum?”
“Well first of all, a bigger gun would have stopped Steel Lance’s flanking maneuver. My tank would have knocked out Smartmouth’s then Chalkboard’s and then the rest of that platoon given how they were still busy with my teammates...”
“Hmm... Well Ah personally don’t believe that but Ah’ll let ya use a VKV TD-8 next round. So will ya stop yer mumble’n now?”
Tanky’s eyes lit up like a fireworks show and she put on a smile that Chalkboard never saw before with the little red Earth Pony. In the back of Chalkboard’s mind, she knew that training tomorrow was going to be a very one sided battle.
- - -
March 13th, 8th year of the Age of the Princesses
Corporal Chalkboard
20th Equestrian Royal Armored Division, C Company.
“Blue Team has lost two MT-2s ya hear?”
In this training match, Applejack’s voice has been a foreshadowing of the terror to come for Blue Team.
“Blue Team has lost another Type S1E5.”
“Chalkboard!” cried Smartmouth over the intercom. “I’m going to secure our left flank, watch my rear will you?”
“I read.”
Chalkboard felt tense. Whenever Commander Applejack would call out tanks that have been knocked out, she would feel a terrible knot in her throat. Red Team was advancing without mercy and they had only lost three tanks to Blue Team’s nine.
“Ya’ll watch out, Blue Team just lost three of their Type S1E5s!”
“Be careful Smartmouth... I’m sure their lead tank is moving to that flank.”
“I don’t think there is anything left of that flank Chalkboard... Wait... what the hell is that? Hoggish! Thirty degrees rig-!”
“Blue team has lost a M-75.”
“I’m sorry Chalkboard... they ambushed me... You’re on your own over there...”
Chalkboard was stunned. Whatever was going on, Red Team had very fast tanks moving through the left flank and ambush Smartmouth. She knew where the tanks would come from and she was determined to take at least one down with her. “Far Shot! Forty-five degrees left! Set range to two hundred meters!”
“I have the road sighted Ma’am.”
“Trail! Get ready to back the tank up after Far Shot opens fire.”
Trailblazer quickly set the gear to reverse, put her hoof on the brakes and prepared to push both accelerator sticks forward.
“I’m ready!”
Chalkboard looked around. She knew that Red Team’s tanks were coming but she felt a sense of paranoia. She waited for what seemed like an eternity. Still, nothing came from the road. She turned her head to the right and saw some movement in the bushes. “Gunner! twenty degrees right! There’s something in the-”
Before Chalkboard could finish, Tanky’s VKV TD-8 crashed through the underbrush. The light tank destroyer quickly turned it’s hull to firing position. Everypony in Chalkboard’s crew panicked. Nopony ever experienced something like this during the Six Week War. Trail Blazer attempted to turn the tank but in her panic, had forgotten that the gear was in reverse and turned the opposite direction the turret was traversing.
“Well...” said Chalkboard as she tried to calm her crew down. “At least they’re serving grilled cheese sandwiches in the mess hall today...”
- - -