Rarity awoke feeling well rested and wonderfully normal. She stretched out, pulling off her sleeping mask and looking out at the bright dawning day with eyes that did not hurt. She hopped off the bed and into her slippers, her magic grabbing a robe from her closet. She felt so good she barely noticed Opal’s usual morning demands.
She was halfway to the door before she noticed something was wrong. She was halfway to the bathroom before she realized that this something that was wrong was lavender. It wasn’t until she looked in the mirror before starting up her shower that she realized that the lavender wrongness was herself.
The lavender unicorn looked in the mirror, and Twilight Sparkle stared back. “Oh come on!” she shouted at her reflection. “How is this something that happens!?”
A frantic pounding on the front door of the boutique tore her attention away from the mirror. “We’re closed!” she screamed down the hall, hoping that whoever the early bird was would stop bashing down her door long enough to hear her.
“Rarity!” Sweetie Belle’s voice floated in from the guest room. “I don’t feel so good.”
The lavender unicorn snarled in frustration. She would much rather be having a panic attack and dramatically fainting right now, but her sister took priority. “A moment, Sweetie!” she called. She looked into the mirror again. “Okay, Rarity, this is just another day in your wonderful, bizarre life. You are a lady, and a lady does not allow such little stumbling blocks to prevent her from being as elegant and wonderful as befits a mare of your refinement. Now get in there and comfort your sister.”
“But my mane!” the lavender unicorn in the mirror replied. “It’s... it’s...”
“I know what it is!” the lavender unicorn snapped, stomping a hoof. “Now you listen and you listen good! It doesn’t matter what’s happened to your mane, or your coat, or your eyes, or anything! You are going to be the big sister you promised you’d be! Or else I will eat every tub of ice cream I own, then go out and buy more!”
The lavender unicorn gasped. “You wouldn’t! My flanks!”
“Will. Get. Fat,” the lavender unicorn growled, narrowing her eyes. “Now are you going to behave, or do I have to get my spoon?”
“No, I’ll do it! I’ll do it!” the lavender unicorn capitulated with a tearful collapse against the sink. “But, can’t I at least give it a brush first?”
“No!”
The lavender unicorn sighed and pulled herself from the mirror, walking the short distance to the guest room and gently nudging the door open. The pounding downstairs had only gotten more insistent, but she ignored it in favor of tending to her family.
Sweetie Belle lay on the bed, a pillow over her head and the covers wrapped tightly around her. “Rarity? Is that you?”
“It’s me, Sweetie,” the lavender unicorn replied. “Are you alright?”
“It hurts, Rarity,” Sweetie said. “Every time I open my eyes, it’s just too bright.”
The lavender unicorn looked to the tightly drawn curtains that threw the room into deep shadows. “Yes, well, I suppose that will happen. Here, dear, let me fetch something for you.” She trotted to her room and grabbed one of her better sleeping masks. She returned quickly, still ignoring the customer-who-wouldn’t-quit, and sat by her sister. “I’ve got something to block out the light, but I’m going to have to move the pillow to put it on you, is that alright?” Sweetie Belle shuddered, but nodded. “Then on three. One. Two. Three!”
The lavender unicorn pulled the pillow away and floated the sleeping mask onto the face of her sister. She had to tie it tightly, but it stayed and Sweetie let out a sigh of relief. The lavender unicorn stared at her sister with sudden fear. Sweetie’s horn had turned lavender, and the color had spread like tendrils down her face and along her coat.
“I don’t like being sick, Rarity,” Sweetie Belle said, pathetic and miserable and heartbreaking.
“Neither do I, dear,” the lavender unicorn said, brushing at her sister’s mane. “But it’ll be okay. This will all be okay.”
“You promise?”
“Pinkie promise,” the lavender unicorn assured her. She nuzzled her sister, gently slipping the pillow under her head. She turned towards the hallway. The pounding at the door had only gotten more insistent, and now the lavender unicorn could make out somepony calling her name. “Will you be alright? I’ve got a very rude customer to make go away.”
“I’ll be okay,” Sweetie Belle said, snuggling deeper into her blankets. “It doesn’t hurt so much anymore. And you Pinkie Promised, so I know it’ll be okay.”
“Yes it will,” The lavender unicorn said, then rose and left the room, softly closing the door behind her.
The moment she was out of earshot of her sister she broke into a gallop. She stormed down the stairs and to her front door, where the knocking continued unabated. “Knock it off!” the lavender unicorn roared, unlatching the door with her magic and slamming it open. “Just who do you think you aaaaaaaahhhhhhh!” She stopped mid-tirade, staring at the pony in front of her.
It was a lavender pony with an athletic build and a mane that ran through the entire spectrum. She also had a very tiny lavender horn poking out of her head and a look of panic in her eyes. “Twilight!” she cried, grabbing the lavender unicorn in a tight hug. “When did you get back? No, wait, who cares, I am just so glad to see you! We have a problem! A big problem! I huge, mondo-disaster problem!”
“Rainbow Dash?” the lavender unicorn asked, aghast.
“Wait, that’s not Twilight’s voice,” Dash said, falling back. “Rarity?”
“Yes, I’m afraid so,” the lavender unicorn admitted. “Rainbow Dash, what? I mean, how?”
“Yeah, that’s what I want to know,” Dash said, pacing back and forth in clear agitation. “My wings are gone, Rarity. Gone!”
“I can see that. And you’re growing a horn.”
“What?” Dash put a hoof to her forehead, feeling the little nub of magical bone. “Oh, man! What the hay is going on? Why do you look like Twilight?”
“Questions dear to both our hearts, I would think,” the lavender unicorn sighed. “I take it you’re not the only pegasus to lose their wings?”
“All of us,” Dash confirmed. “We’re all turning purple too.”
“Lavender,” the lavender unicorn corrected.
“Whatever! I just want it to stop!”
“Have you been to the hospital?”
“Not yet,” Dash said. “I was barely able to get down from my house this morning. I’ve been freaking out, all I could think of was to get to Twilight and figure this out, but she’s in Canterlot, so I came here.”
“And why did you come here?”
“Well, duh, it’s a magic thing, right?” Dash said.
“I’m not a mage, darling, I’m a seamstress,” the lavender unicorn pointed out.
“You’re a unicorn,” Dash countered. “And with Twilight gone you’re the best unicorn in town.”
“I am...” the lavender unicorn paused, thinking about it. There were plenty of other unicorns in Ponyville, true, but most of them hadn’t spent the last few years hanging out with the most powerful mage in millennia. “Really? The best?”
“The absolute, no-doubt, best,” Dash confirmed.
“What about Lyra? She went to Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. She has to know quite a bit about magic.”
“Lyra? Seriously? Who has time to find Lyra?” Dash quipped.
“I suppose you’re right,” the lavender unicorn sighed. Then she straightened, holding her head high and proud. “Very well, then! I will be the best unicorn!”
“Great!” Dash said, then grabbed the lavender unicorn again and began shouting in her face. “Now, what the hay is happening to me?”
“Rainbow Dash! Please!” the lavender unicorn pulled away from her friend. “Best unicorn I may be, but I still know next to nothing about what is going on here.”
“Oh. Um. Hospital?”
“Quite.”
***
The hospital was, once again, bedlam. Lavender bedlam.
“Hey there!” Applejack called out as she saw them approach. Her own coat had splotches of lavender coloring, and a full-sized unicorn horn was jutting out of her forehead. “Boy am I glad to see you two. Okay, three diamond cutie mark. Rarity?”
“Indeed.”
“She’s gone full Twilight,” Dash said. “I’ve got a freaking horn coming out of my head.”
“Been there, done that,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes up to look at the protrusion. “Least my headache’s gone. Light’s still buggin’ me, though.”
“I seem to be beyond that stage,” the lavender unicorn said. “So. I guess we’re all turning into Twilight then.”
“Looks like,” Dash sighed.
“Eyup,” Applejack agreed.
“So. Who do you think’s responsible for this one?”
“What makes ya think somepony’s responsible?” Applejack asked.
“What else could it be?”
“Poison Joke pollen blowin’ into town,” Applejack replied.
“The Elements of Harmony screwing with us again,” Dash added.
“Okay, so there are options that don’t allow me to whine at somepony with justification,” the lavender unicorn said, tossing her straight mane in a way that would have looked wonderful had it been artfully curled. “I, for one, choose to believe in an ass that I can kick. No offense, of course.”
“None taken,” replied a behorned, half-lavender mule who was passing by.
“So what do we do?” Dash asked, pawing at her nascent horn.
“Well, first we see to family. Applejack, dear, how are Big Mac and Apple Bloom?”
“Big Mac’s, uh, better,” Applejack said. “Closer to the Twilight end of things than the Big Mac one, though. Apple Bloom’s eyes can’t handle light none right now, but otherwise she’s doin’ okay.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” the lavender unicorn said, frowning. “How about Granny Smith?”
“She’s out of town, visitin’ Uncle Apple Strudel.”
“Thank Celestia for that. My own dear sister is in a similar state to Apple Bloom, and quickly approaching a similar state to myself. I would worry about dear Granny Smith were she going through the same hardship.”
“Man, even the foals!” Dash shook her head. “This is messed up.”
“Not all of them, though,” the lavender unicorn pointed out. “Pinkie said the Cakes were fine. I suppose that might be something to look into, if the youngest of foals and their parents are being spared it might be a clue to what’s happening, or how to stop it.”
“Good idea. I figure the first thing we gotta do is keep the town from panickin’,” Applejack said. “Last thing we need right now is a bunch of scared and hurtin’ ponies runnin’ all over the place.”
“And we must also discover the cause of this... this tragedy!” the lavender unicorn declared with a stomp of her hoof. “The doctors will do their best, I’m sure, but if this is one of our issues then they will be quite out of their depth.”
“Wish Twilight were here,” Applejack said. “For real, I mean. Not just a town full of lookalikes. We need somepony who knows magic.”
“Rarity,” Dash said.
“I said I would be the best unicorn, and so I shall,” the lavender unicorn said, primly sticking her nose in the air. “But I still hold that I am no mage, and we need to actually consult with an actual magical authority. Like Lyra.” Applejack and Dash gave her identical nonplussed looks. “Oh, please, she went to that fancy Canterlot magic school the same as Twilight, and she’s been best friends with an Alicorn Princess for longer than we have.” They continued to stare at her with the flat expressions of ponies who were not having any of that crap. “Fine. How about Zecora? Is there a problem with her?”
“No, Zecora’s fine,” Applejack said.
“That’s a really good idea, Rarity,” Dash crowed. “I bet she’ll know exactly what’s going on!”
“Yeah! And she can mix up a potion and we’ll all have to drink it, but then it turns out that it wasn’t really Zecora but her eeeeevil twin sister the entire time!” Pinkie Pie said, appearing among them as if she had been there the entire time. She was wearing a pair of baggy, multicolored knit caps that hid her mane and tail. A horn stuck out of her forehead and lavender streaks had spread their way down her body, giving her a bizarre tie-dye appearance. “So the potion is poisoned and then the real Zecora shows up and they fight and we can’t tell the difference between them and we have to figure it out because we have only twenty seconds to live and if we pick the wrong Zecora we’re doomed! So we ask them a question to prove who she is and I haven’t figured out the rest but somewhere in there we have to shoot them both!”
“When did you get here?” Dash asked after a long moment of utter silence.
“Right when Rarity said ‘How about Zecora? Is there a problem with her?’ and then Applejack said–”
“We got it, thanks,” Applejack said.
“No, that’s not it, you said... oh, wait, no, I forgot. But it was definitely about Zecora!” Pinkie said, striking a thoughtful pose.
“Well,” the lavender unicorn said, shaking off the usual effects of a Pinkie Pie interruption. “I propose we split into two groups, one to go and discover what Zecora might know of this, ah, transformation, and the other to deal with the inevitable chaos that ponyville will descend into.”
“Fair 'nough,” Applejack replied.
“Yeah, I’m down with that,” Dash added.
“What are we doing again?” Pinkie asked.
“Excellent. Since that matter’s settled, I suppose all that’s left is deciding which of us stays to keep the town from panicking onetwothreenotme!”
“Not me!” Dash said, putting her talent with speed to use.
“Not … aw, darn it.” Applejack kicked at the dirt.
“Wait, who’s panicking?” Pinkie asked. “Because I’m really good at that, and I don’t want to be left out of any panic parties!”
“Don’t worry, Pinkie Pie, you won’t be,” Applejack assured her.
“Well, good!” Pinkie crossed her forelegs in front of her and twisted her expression into an exaggerated pout. “I hate being left out.”
“Speaking of, dear, how are you feeling?” the lavender unicorn asked.
“Oh, you know, turning purple,” Pinkie said, reverting to a casual stance.
“Lavender.”
“Whatever. My headache’s gone, so that’s good. The rest of it’s not-so-fun but I’m keeping my spirits up so that everypony will know that even if you’re hurting and tired and achey and purple, you can still smile. And if you smile then the world will be a bit better, not just for you, but for everypony around you.”
“Wow, Pinkie, that’s awesome!” Dash said.
“Downright inspirin’,” Applejack added.
“Indeed,” the lavender unicorn agreed with a nod. “If you can keep your positive attitude through this ghastly time, then I know it will all work out. By the way, that chapeau is lovely, wherever did you get it?”
“Oh, this?” Pinkie said, fluffing at her mane-concealing hat. “I made it last night.”
“You can knit?”
“Sometimes. You like it?”
“I do,” the lavender unicorn replied. “I must say, though, I am surprised to see you wearing it, it’s not your usual, ah, style.”
“Well, I figured I’d need it.”
“Whatever for?” Pinkie removed her hat. Rarity screamed. Pinkie replaced her hat. Rarity stopped screaming. “Well, yes. I see how that might be a prudent measure.”
“How does it move like that?” a wide-eyed Applejack asked in a shocked whisper.
“It doesn’t like the new color scheme,” Pinkie said, somewhat apologetically.
“At least it isn’t a talking bucket of turnips,” Dash said, unfazed by the squirming horror she had just witnessed. Applejack and the lavender unicorn shot her a confused look. “You don’t want to know. Trust me.”
“I’ll do that,” Applejack said, looking at Pinkie and visibly forcing herself not to stare at the hat. “Come on, Pinkie, we’ve gotta get the mayor and call a town meetin’ or somethin’ before somepony gets it in their head to start somethin’ stupid.”
“Like an arts degree?”
“Sure, why not? See you two at the town hall when y’all get back. Be careful. Who knows what’s happenin’ in the Everfree right now.”
“Come on, AJ, it’s us,” Dash said with a cocky toss of her mane. “We’ll be fine.”
“I’ll hold you to that,” Applejack said, prodding Pinkie into motion as the two set off for the center of Ponyville.
“How long you figure they can hold it together?” Dash asked.
“Eh, a few hours at most,” the lavender unicorn replied with a shrug. “If we hurry we should be able to get back before the real havoc breaks out.”
“You think Zecora will really be able to help us out?”
“Given our options? I think she’s our best bet. Her knowledge of obscure and magical lore is deeper than that of most scholars. At the very least she’ll be a cool head that can help us think it through. I just hope that she hasn’t...”
***
“... turned into Twilight Sparkle just like the rest of us! Drat!”
The lavender unicorn could have been looking in a mirror. Her double stood in the middle of Zecora’s hut, stirring a bubbling potion that smelled of cinnamon and sewage. The only thing that distinguished this double as actually being Zecora were a few fading stripes of black in her mane. From the mess in the hut, and the scattered remains of previous potions, the brew she was stirring was only the latest in a series of attempts. From the frown on the zebra-turned-unicorn’s face, it was likely to turn out no better.
Zecora stopped her stirring as the two entered, staring in open-mouthed shock at the sight of them. When she finally found her voice, it came out in the same rhyming cadence that they were familiar with. “I thought a great curse had come onto me, that I must now appear as what you can see. But now from Rarity’s voice I can tell, it is not only I who is under this spell. Twilight we seem, but she we are not, and brave Rainbow Dash is nearly as caught! Tell me, my friends of good ponykind, what evil has wrought this lavender bind?”
“This means it got Fluttershy too,” Dash said, hanging her head. “Hey, Zecora, we kinda need your help.”
“That I surmised from how we three look, but I know no answers from sage or from book. My herbs and my powders have not aided me, a fact that is plain for any being to see. Seven times have I brewed, from dawn until now, but to end this affliction? I am stumped on the how.”
“Great,” Dash sighed. “So we came all this way for nothing?”
“Hardly,” the lavender unicorn rebuffed. “Zecora, the whole of Ponyville has caught this same, ah, curse as you. It’s turning everypony into copies of Twilight as we speak, and many of us are worried. My friends and I think it might be caused by some malevolent force–”
“Or the Elements screwing with us again,” Dash interrupted.
“You know what? We have no idea what is going on either,” the lavender unicorn said, giving up on being delicate. “I am, however, quite certain that my darling sister is in pain because of it and I am left with simply nothing to wear! We need your help, Zecora. Please come back to Ponyville with us. I’m sure that if we put all our heads together we can figure out a solution. Before... something worse happens!”
“Well, it’s not really that bad,” Dash said. “I mean, turning into Twilight won’t suck so much, right?”
“I’m sorry, did you forget that your wings are gone?” the lavender unicorn asked, her voice hitting near-whining registers.
“Yeah, and I got over that, like, hours ago. Now I just want this horn to finish growing so I can start doing magic!”
“...What?”
“Yeah! We’re turning into Twilight, right? So we’ll get Twilights’ super-awesome unicorn magic! Then I can teleport wherever I go, and that’ll be, like, twenty percent faster!”
“Twenty percent. Really.”
“It’s my go-to fraction.”
“I am sorry to butt in, but my patience grows thin,” Zecora said, giving them both a hard look that did she did not quite get working with Twilight’s features. “I would be happy to return to Ponyville with you, but that would not be the best thing I could do. My books and my herbs are all gathered here, to find a solution I will need them all near. I would be of no help to you ponies in town, so be on your way, but leave not with a frown. I will be seeking a cure to this curse with my brew, and if I do find one I’ll share it with you. Until then I ask that you be gone from this place, my concentration is ruined, this batch is a waste.”
“Of course, dear,” the lavender unicorn said, but paused before she turned to go. “Though, now that I’ve got a proper color study in front of me, do you mind if I try out a few things? Just a few ideas, nothing elaborate. I mean, I know Twilight is a winter, but I’m sure I could make a darker spring contrast work just as well and I’d like to see it on somepony else before I tried it on myself.”
Zecora’s eyes narrowed.