//------------------------------//
// Yellowstone: Epilogue 
// Story: The Conversion Bureau: Yellowstone 
// by Anonsi 
//------------------------------//


Conversion Bureau Off-Shoot
Based on Blaze’s original idea
Might not follow his world’s rules, but Meh, it’s just a fan-fic of a fan-fic.
By: Anonsi (Time to wrap this up, the end is near!)

Yellowstone
Epilogue
No Place like Home



The morning came, and Twilight had to wrestle herself from her bed. She had opted to sleep in the master bedroom with the rest of the Garden family, and the warmth she felt from the others was hard to break away from. She raised her head and looked over her bedmates. Tall Leaf and Morning Dew were as always inseparable, and Merry Gold was nestled among their legs. The only one missing was Busy Bee, but Twilight didn’t have to think too hard about where she might be.
Hopping off the bed, eyes still mostly shut, Twilight moved into the room next door where the humans slept. Megan and Hawk had taken the beds for themselves, leaving Zorro the couch. The decision making process went along the lines of that they were wounded and Zorro didn’t have a scratch on him, so he got the couch. And there, curled up in the crook of Hawk’s arm, was Busy Bee, snoozing peacefully.

Twilight couldn’t help but let go an “Awww…”

Twilight suddenly smelled something sweet from the kitchen. It smelled like breakfast. Still half dazed, Twilight sauntered into the kitchen to find Zorro in his loose black shirt preparing some pancakes. Zorro noticed her and gave a smile with a tired grunt.
Twilight gave a grunt back and took a seat at the large wooden table feeling much better than she thought she should. It was surreal to her, that yesterday she had seen such awful killing and death, but today the world seemed just fine and dandy. Almost like it never even happened, but Twilight knew better. She still saw the chicks under Anaconda’s hoof, and heard the crunch as the hoof came down.

“Do you like blueberries in your pancakes niña?” Zorro finally broke the silence.

Twilight gave a small, pleasant, moan, “They’re my favorite.” She rested her head on the table, considering going back to sleep. Before she could, a plate holding a stack of the best looking pancakes she’d ever seen lay in front of her. The succulent smell filling her nostrils, Twilight’s mouth watered immediately as she counted the blue specs that dotted the delicious pastries.

Zorro also slid a small bowl of apple juice across the table to her, “And here is something to wash it down with.” He gave her a smirk and resumed filling out more plates, humming a tune Twilight thought was rather catchy.

Twilight hovered utensils over to her and began to dig in, savoring each bite. After gulping down the first fork full, she let out a ‘Yum’ sound. “These are the best pancakes I’ve ever had,” she said definitively.

Megan entered, fully dressed, but still tying her pony-tail off with her red bow, “They should be. It’s his mother’s recipe, and that lady knew her pancakes.” Megan walked to the fridge and poured herself a glass of apple juice and took a plate Zorro had put to the side of the others. Afterward she sat down and began eating.

After Twilight finished, she walked to the sink and began using her magic to wash them, humming a similar tune to Zorro’s. A question popped into Twilight’s head all of the sudden, and before she knew it, she was already asking it. “Megan, are you and Zorro…together?”

Megan’s response was lightning fast, “No.” Her tone gave Twilight a hint to not proceed down this line of questioning.

Zorro just laughed a bit, “Why do you ask little one? Seeing if I’m free for your own romantic pursuits?”

Twilight blushed, “Oh no! Nothing like that, I was just curious, and…and-” Twilight stumbled looking for some way to get off this subject, and was relieved to see Morning Dew, Tall Leaf, and Merry Gold enter the kitchen. “OH LOOK! It’s the Garden family! Hello Garden Family! Zorro made pancakes!”

Merry Gold’s face lit up from its drowsy state, “I love pancakes!” She galloped over to the chair and hopped onto it, and nearly squealed when Zorro placed a stack of warm pancakes in front of her.

Tall Leaf looked around, and under the table, “Has anypony seen Busy Bee?”

Megan raised her hand and then pointed to her and Hawk’s room. “Last I saw she was sleeping soundly next to Hawk. It was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Tall Leaf exchanged glances with his wife, before letting out a sigh. “I think Bee is going to have a tough time saying goodbye darlin’.”  Morning Dew gave a sullen nod and took another bite of the pancakes. Tall Leaf walked off to the human’s room and returned a minute or so later, a very sleepy filly on his back.

A few more minutes passed in silence as the Garden family ate their breakfast, and each one giving satisfied moans after they finished. Hawk stood at the door, fully dressed and holding his black duffel bag. “Zorro, Megan, Twilight, pick up is in an hour. Let’s get ready.” Hawk took a glass of juice and downed it with one gulp.

Zorro and Megan disappeared into their respective sleeping quarters and began packing. Hawk went outside and began to load the wagon, with some help from Twilight’s magic. Outside, most the Garden family had gathered to say their farewells. Busy Bee however, was missing from the scene, but faint sobs could be heard from the filly’s bedroom.

Merry Gold and Morning Dew both gave Twilight a hug and told her to stay safe. Morning Dew presented Twilight with a small circlet made of flowers and the unicorn placed it on her head with pride. As for Hawk, Morning Dew and Tall Leaf gave their unending gratitude for protecting them and their family. Zorro and Megan exited the cabin and were treated in much the same way. Merry Gold gave Megan a flower circlet, and the human placed it upon her head with glee.
After the wagon was loaded up, and Buttercup fastened to the front, a small hiccup drew everyone’s attention to the front door. Busy Bee had obviously been crying inside, and she ran to Hawk, nuzzling his legs.

“Do you have to go Mr. Hawk?” Busy Bee leaned against his legs, looking him in the eyes. Her own were big and watery, making it difficult to not bend down and give her a big hug.

Hawk, against his better judgment, did it anyway saying, “Yes Busy Bee, I do. Twilight needs to go back to New York, and I still have a job to do,” as he squeezed her close to his heart.

“But what if we get in trouble? Or what if…” she buried her head against his chest, “…what if I miss you?” Busy Bee looked like she was about to start crying all over again.

Hawk put her down in front of him and gave her a small kiss on the forehead. “The Six Tribes’ rangers will keep you safe from now on. And if you miss me…” Hawk reached into a pocket of his coat and extracted a silver disk. It had the image of a hawk on it and what seemed to be a dent from a bullet, “…just hold this close.”

Busy Bee marveled at it and gingerly took it out of Hawk’s hand. She gazed up at him holding back tears and nodded.

Twilight and Megan’s eyes grew watery, but they held their silence.

After all was said and done, the Garden family stood in front of their new home, rays of light streaming in through the trees giving a majestic ambiance beneath the canopy. Twilight swore that, as Hawk had walked to join her and the other humans, she saw a tear roll down his face. She didn’t say anything though, as she thought it was sweet.

“Stay safe now!” cried Morning Dew, “And come back any time!”

“Yeah! Come back anytime!” added Merry Gold, jumping gleefully.

Tall Leaf and Busy Bee just smiled and waved, which Twilight, Hawk, Zorro, and Megan all returned with waves and smiles of their own while they rode away down the forest path. T.J. walked alongside Buttercup at a leisurely pace.
They rode a long time in silence, until they came to an open clearing. Once there, Twilight heard what sounded like a thumping noise. Eventually a large, dark, tube looking thing descended over the canopy, landing a short distance away. It was much larger than what Twilight had expected, and looked like it could hold two cars instead of two horses. After it landed, and the wind softened enough for the group to approach, a ramp lowered from the back.

From it walked a human woman in a jumpsuit and a pilot’s helmet. “Captain Samantha Barnes reporting for pick-up duty Agent Hawk. Welcome aboard.”

“Thank you captain,” said Hawk dismounting the wagon and unfastening Buttercup.

Cpt. Barnes helped the group load their bags and horses onto the transport helicopter with such efficiency and speed, that Twilight began to consider if Captain Barnes might want a job as a library assistant. Twilight shook the thought from her head, remembering how Spike reacted the last time she hired new help.

After everything was loaded and locked down, the humans all sat on benches that lined the walls of the vehicle, and Twilight lied down next to them. She was tired, and thought of her friends back at the bureau, and all the things she wanted to tell them about.
The beats of the helicopter blades where hypnotic; Twilight fell asleep within minutes of takeoff. She dreamt of her library in Ponyville and of how much she missed her friends, eventually drifting to Sweet Apple Acres where a big red stallion was bucking trees, waiting for her. In the chopper, Hawk looked at his companions as Twilight started moaning in her sleep.

Hawk put his coat over Twilight like a blanket and said, “This is getting awkward.”



***



“…And that’s what it’s like ta’ live in Equestria! Any questions?” Applejack had just finished her fourth orientation speech this week, and she was hoping none of the humans would take her up on her request. It was fun the first time, but they always asked the same questions.

“Do we get to choose what kind of pony we become?” No, it’s random.

“Will we already have cutie marks?” Yes, unless you’re young, then you’ll have to work for it.

“How do you do stuff without hands?” Magic, mostly.

“Do you know you’re name is a drink?” Yes.

After about five more minutes of the same questions Applejack had heard before, the orientation ended and the auditorium emptied. She let out a groan as she walked back to her temporary office. It used to be Twilight’s, but she had left Applejack in charge while she was away. On the way there, Applejack heard a loud thrumming noise from somewhere outside, but she was too tired to really care.
Applejack opened to door to ‘her’ office and beheld the room. It was not the same, immaculately sorted room she had stepped into on the day Twilight had departed. Stacks of unsorted papers and documents lay strewn all over the place, and the waste bin was overflowing with balled up pieces of paper and old candy wrappers. On the desk was a computer that lay dormant.
Applejack let out a sigh as she walked behind the desk and gazed at the blank screen of the monitor. Two days ago, Applejack had walked in on Rainbow Dash doing something on it, and the next thing the farmer pony knew, Dash had sent a hoof into the power switch with such force that it broke the darn thing. Dash had flown out the window before Applejack could make heads or tails of what just happened, leaving the confused earth pony with a broken computer.

When confronted about it later, the Pegasus only said, “I wasn’t doing anything bad on it! You just surprised me!” while her blue face turned a deep red. Applejack knew when a pony was covering something up, but even a pony without the Element of Honesty could tell what Rainbow Dash was doing was something most considered naughty.

So Applejack, who was just beginning to get the hang of using the keyboard and mouse, now had to sort almost a hundred or more documents by hoof. She let out another big sigh through her nose. “I really wish Twilight would just come back already.”

As if she was waiting for that exact phrase, Pinkie Pie bounded into the room, her face beaming brighter than her usual smile. “OHMYGOSH APPLEJACK! Guess What?!”

Applejack grew hopeful that Twilight had finally come back, “What is it sugar-cube? Is Twilight back?” Her voice was expectant, and quite honestly, had a pleading tone to it.

Pinkie Pie rapidly shook her head from side to side, “No silly filly! More humans are here! And they must have made the BEST ENTRANCE EVER!”

Applejack let her head sink back onto the desk. “Oh,” she said disheartened.

“Yeah!” continued Pinkie, “They just came outta the sky with a big helicopter and landed out in the parking lot! Oh it was so loud, and I could hear beats on the wind and I felt like I could make a song about it, so I did! Here let me-”

Applejack raised her eyebrow, “A heli-what now?”

Pinkie moved her face in close to Applejack’s, “It’s a human flying machine! Like that thinga-ma-jig I built that one time to follow Rainbow Dash that one time that meanie-pants Gilda was in town!” The pink pony stuck out her arms and began to spin, “WOO! WOO! WOO!” After a few seconds she fell to the floor, dizzy and laughing. Applejack rolled her eyes and got moving to the door. Anything was better than just sitting her looking at the dead monitor.

The two ponies walked calmly to the bureau’s lobby, passing by the dormitories where human heads were poking out of their rooms looking confused. Once there, they saw a tall man in a long leather coat and wide brim hat standing at the reception desk talking to the wall-eyed pony known as Ditzy Doo. The other humans in the lobby were giving him odd looks, and generally avoiding him. One of Ditzy’s eyes landed on Applejack, and the winged mare gave a relieved expression.

“There she is sir! The current head muffin in the oven!” said Ditzy smiling wide.

The human cocked an eyebrow at Ditzy, and then turned to Applejack, taking note of her hat. “Applejack, right?”

Applejack nodded, looking out the front windows at the helicopter with earnest confusion. “Yes I am, but what’s with all this racket?”

“My name is Agent Hawk. Come with me.” With that he moved to the door and held it open for Applejack and Pinkie, who bounced merrily up to the human.

“What’s that thing?” asked Pinkie, looking at Hawk’s revolver.

“A noise maker,” he said bluntly.

“Oooooh…I love noise makers!” marveled the pink earth pony.

Applejack pushed Pinkie out the door, “Come on sugar cube. Let’s see what this is all about.”

As soon as Applejack and Pinkie went outside, they saw a small violet, and slightly flustered, unicorn descending the loading ramp. Before Twilight knew they were even there, she was dog piled by Applejack and Pinkie Pie resulting in a big group hug.



*	*	*



Once inside and resituated in her room, Twilight flopped on her bed. All she needed to do now was to wait for Pinkie’s inevitable party to start, and she could begin to wrap up her day. Considering the state of her office however, she was not in any particular rush to get back to the normal tedium of life in the bureau. She had only glanced over the room for a second or two before deeming it ‘not worth it.’
The door to her room swung open and a small purple dragon rushed up to her, leapt onto the bed, and landed a great big hug around her neck.

“Twilight!” Spike yelled, not withholding any enthusiasm.

“Spike!” Twilight was thrilled to see her assistant, and she squeezed him close to her. It had been too long since they had seen each other face to face. Or it felt that way at least.

“Oh gosh I’ve missed you! It’s been soooo boring around here without you around. I nearly went insane without you telling me to pick stuff up!” He looked up and stared at Twilight with a serious face, “And before you ask, I had nothing to do with what happened to your computer.”

Twilight’s smile changed to one of concern, “What happened to my computer?”

Before Spike could answer, he belched out a cloud of fire and smoke. The cloud twisted and spun itself into the form of a scroll, which plopped down onto the bed. Twilight wasted no time in unfurling the scroll and reading aloud the immaculate writing of the Princess.

“My dear Twilight Sparkle,

It fills me with great joy to hear that you have returned from human lands safely. I was worried beyond measure when the human President told me that your train never arrived at its destination. He reassured me to remain calm however, as he was certain his guardian would never fail in completing a task.

But that is neither here nor there, and we can discuss your adventure when I come by to visit this evening. Expect me around four o’clock.

Your loving mentor, and friend,
Celestia

P.S. Did you see my debate with the HLF? How do you think I did? I’m pleased to say things went well with them, and their leadership tells me that they have lost much of the animosity they once felt towards us, and that they hope to live in harmony with us from now on. See you soon.”

Twilight looked at the clock on her wall. It read “3:54.” Twilight bounded out of her bed dropping Spike on his rump, she grabbed a comb with her magic and began brushing her mane and tail with such haste, Rainbow Dash’s head would spin. “Spike, go tell everypony that the Princess is on her way here! And go now!”

The baby dragon dashed out of the room and Twilight could hear Rarity gasp as she heard the news, followed by a series of crashes and a “What am I going to wear on such short notice?!” from down the hall.

Within minutes, Twilight and Rarity were standing in the front lobby, both looking nervous. Twilight because her idol and surrogate mother would arrive at any moment, and Rarity because she was couldn’t remember if she had all the accoutrements to her most recent gown. The lobby was filled with ponies and humans who wanted to meet the mythical princess in the flesh.
Megan and Applejack sat in a corner exchanging stories with each other. Twilight looked at them side by side and thought she saw a resemblance between the two, but her thoughts were interrupted by the blaring of trumpets. Outside landed four white Pegasus guard ponies in golden armor, and after rushing to the entrance and opening the door, four more royal guards flew to the ground, pulling a magnificent chariot behind them. In it sat a divine figure that seemed to glow with all the warmth of spring and summer.
Princess Celestia stepped down from the chariot and entered the main lobby of the Bureau. All the ponies present bowed and the humans cheered. Twilight stepped forward into view of her mentor. They both smiled widely as Celestia leaned over to nuzzle the side of Twilight’s head, causing the young mare to giggle.

“It’s so good to see you again Princess,” said Twilight, basking in the presence of her teacher.

Celestia looked around the room smiling, and then back to Twilight, “And it is good to see you, my most treasured pupil. I have been looking forward to seeing you again actually. My week has been just awful not knowing if you were safe or not.”

Twilight just kept up that dumb smile, “Oh don’t worry Princess, the human agents were more than capable of keeping us safe.”

Celestia beamed at the news, “Well if it’s all right, I’d like to meet them and give them my thanks in person.”

“Right this way!” Twilight was more than happy to let Celestia meet her new friends. She just hoped she didn’t have to get into the messy details of the journey.

Twilight led the group of ponies and humans to the auditorium where Pinkie had set up a wonderful looking party. Rainbow Dash was boasting at Hawk, while Zorro was stabbing apples out of the air with his sword, much to the amusement of Pinkie.

“And then there was the time I won the best young flyer’s competition by doing a sonic rainboom.” Dash was floating next to Hawk looking very proud of herself. Hawk was sitting with a thousand yard stare nodding his head, saying “That’s nice.”

When Celestia and Twilight entered, the two agents stopped what they were doing and moved to approach the goddess, while the ponies they were talking to trotted close behind them.

Celestia regarded Hawk and Zorro, and gave a small bow of her head, “Thank you for keeping Twilight safe. She means a great deal to me.” Twilight almost fainted when she heard her idol say such kind words, but maintained her composure.

Hawk gave a respectful bow of his own, “No problem your highness. Twilight is a capable young mare, and we wouldn’t have completed out journey without her.”

“I didn’t do that much,” Twilight chimed in, blushing under Hawk’s praise.

Celestia smiled at her student’s modesty, continuing, “And what are your names, so that I may remember you for your service?”

Zorro removed his hat and made a sweeping bow, “Don Zorro De la Vega, but most just call me Zorro, your majesty.”

Hawk glanced at Zorro and shook his head. “I am Agent Hawk, at your service. And over there…” Hawk pointed to Megan, “…is Megan, who must be the best sniper this side of the prime meridian. I don’t think she’s ever told me her last name though.”

Megan walked out of the crowd rolling her eyes in great arcs, and formally greeted the Princess. “Hello your highness.”

“You know,” said Zorro, “She never told me her last name either.” Both Hawk and Zorro shrugged, earning a few chortles from the crowd.

Celestia let a grin cross her face, “Well then, Hawk, Zorro, and Megan, I thank you from the bottom of my being. Now,” she said looking around the crowd, “how about we get this party started, hmm?” This elicited a great cheer as the crowd surged into the auditorium. Celestia looked at Twilight who seemed to be in a blissful haze, “Well then Twilight. Let’s catch up with your new friends, and maybe you can tell me what you’ve learned while in human lands.”

Twilight snapped out of her happy coma and replied, “Oh! Yes of course!” The group found a cozy spot to sit and chat. For the rest of the night Twilight told Celestia and her friends about her to entire trip to Yellowstone and back, Hawk filling in any blanks that she left unfilled. Twilight left out the part with the chicks, for Fluttershy’s sake, and Hawk left out the parts that involved Big Mac for Twilight’s.



*	*	*



After the party, and subsequent cleanup, Twilight found herself going through her saddlebags, putting things she had taken with her back into their proper place. Then she came to two books she had not originally brought with her. One was a thick tome about knights, the other a pink diary. Regarding both fondly, she placed them both onto her bookshelf.

“Twilight,” came her teacher’s voice, “I’m about to go.” Celestia peeked her head into Twilight’s room, a habit she had developed while Twilight lived with her in the castle.

After a brief moment of reminiscing, Twilight said, “Thank you so much for coming, it felt really good catching up with you.” With that, Twilight gave the Princess another hug and began to escort her to the front entrance.

“You’ve had quite a week my student,” Celestia said after a while, “what do you think of the human’s now that you have been among them in their world?”

Twilight reflected on what she had seen, finally coming up with an answer she thought would suffice. “Humans are harsh creatures, but they have to be because their world is harsh and dangerous. Sometimes in their pursuit to survive, they cross each other, and most times they make friends and can work together, but other times it doesn’t work out and they feel that they have to fight. They are mostly good, I think, but sometimes they just plain old turn bad, like Cottonmouth, and live to cause other humans misery.” Twilight paused, looking to see if the Princess was satisfied.

Celestia nodded, and gave Twilight a smile, “I think that is a good analysis Twilight, if a bit brief. But I am glad you have learned something about this new world.”

They entered the lobby, and the dying rays of sunset streamed in through the doors. Hawk was saluting Captain Barnes. The woman walked outside to her awaiting transport, and shortly thereafter took off and flew away. The pegasi had to move inside not to be blown off their hooves.

“Well I guess it’s my turn,” said Celestia, summoning her guards to her, “Stay well Twilight Sparkle.” She leaned over and gave Twilight a kiss on the forehead. The room exploded with ‘Aaaaaaw’s. Celestia and Twilight didn’t mind though, as they thought it was cute as well. With that, Celestia departed the lobby and mounted her carriage and with a few last looks at her student, took off.

Hawk and Zorro were assembling their bags while Megan stood next to Applejack, helping where she could. Megan was going to stay a while, as it turned out. Apparently T.J. was pregnant with Buttercup’s foal and was due in a month or two. Fluttershy was extremely excited about the news, and had already begun assembling an acceptable place for the new foal. Megan would become Fluttershy’s helper in the meantime, and help out Applejack with any of her tasks.

Zorro finally zipped up the last few bags and placed them over his shoulders, and began to walk to the exit. Twilight looked at Zorro as he moved past her, carrying Hawk’s duffel bag. “So long niña, I hope that our paths will cross again one day.”

“I do too Mr. Zorro. It was an honor having you with us, and I’m glad you came,” replied Twilight. The two exchange bows and Zorro walked out of the door.

Hawk stepped forward next, and the two spent a long time looking at each other. Hawk knelt down, putting him on eye level with Twilight. “Well Sprinkles, it seems this is goodbye. At least for now anyway, so you be sure not to get kidnapped by anything. I don’t think I’d survive another rescue mission.”

Twilight gave out a laugh, replying, “Yeah well, maybe you should retire and settle down somewhere. Maybe a nice cabin out west,” Twilight doused her next words with as much of a childish and mocking tone she could, “maybe out near Busy Bee~.”

Hawk laughed, “That’s a low blow Twilight.”

“I owed you for that stunt you pulled on the wagon,” Twilight leaned in and whispered in his ear, “about the whole Big Mac thing.” Applejack perked her ears thinking she heard something. But Megan quickly caught her attention again with a story about her father’s apple orchard.

“Fair enough,” Hawk coughed, and reached into his pockets again, “I have a going away present for you.” He presented Twilight with the Star Wars Original Trilogy DVD Box Set. “Every group of friends need these. And you have a lot of friends who haven’t seen this, if I remember right.”

Twilight lifted the movies with her magic and placed them next to her on the floor. “Thank you Hawk,” she said blushing at the gift, “and now I think I owe you something for rescuing me.” Before Hawk could ask what it was, or say it wasn’t necessary, Twilight gave him a small, quick, peck on the lips. Looking very bashful, Twilight looked down at her hooves. Hawk just chuckled a bit.

Hawk gave Twilight a big, strong, hug and then stood up. “So long Sprinkles. I think it’s about time I hit the dusty trail. See you later.” He turned and walked out the door to where Zorro stood waiting next to two motorcycles he had found. Hawk mounted his, and Zorro followed suit. After a few moments, the two men drove off down the street, and into the sunset.

As he left, memories began to resurface. Memories of empty and desolate streets filled only with wild dogs howling in the dead of night, yearning for blood. Memories of screaming winds that could rip the earth asunder with its rage, and a deep, terrible darkness that made Twilight shudder. Memories of cruel men, with sick pleasures and corrupt minds working against all that Twilight held dear. All of these memories floated in and out of her subconscious. It was almost unbearable to think she might have to live with these images in her head for the rest of her life.

But fortunately, Hawk had given her a way to distract herself from these images; A way for her to escape her memories.

Twilight sighed and looked at Applejack and Megan, who smiled back at her, both of them giggling like fillies on the first day of school. Twilight let her face give a big smile. She picked up the films Hawk had given her and raised them above her head.


“Who wants to watch a movie?”




***The End***