//------------------------------// // Chapter 4: Friendship is...Something // Story: My Little Deadpool: Friendship is Deadpool // by LightTechnology //------------------------------// After Deadpool demonstrated his situational powers to Twilight and Rainbow Dash, he turned things back to normal and returned authority to where it belonged. “So basically, you have the powers to control time, space, and reality,” Twilight said still in somewhat disbelief. Deadpool scratched his cheek. “It’s complicated. It’s not really my main staple, if you catch my drift.” [Be careful, though. We’ve never abused this sort of power this frequently at any other time.] {That’s because fanfics give us more freedom to do crazy shit!} “Otherwise,” Deadpool continued. “I’m just your regular friendly neighborhood mercenary, or as I like to call it, ’cleaner of the gene-pool.’” “What’s a mercenary?” asked Rainbow Dash. “A guy who does cool stuff for money,” Deadpool explained. “It’s a dangerous life, sure, but someone has to do it.” “Wow~” Rainbow Dash said awestruck. “Oh brother,” Twilight said as she rolled her eyes. “Wait a minute. Didn’t you just say you came here because you were sick of your old life?” “Yeah. Sure, living in my world, everyday’s pretty much one excitement after another, but after a while you just get sick of it all.” “Boy, do I know how that feels,” Rainbow Dash mumbled. “What I wouldn’t give to live your life...” Twilight quietly looked at Rainbow Dash. Deadpool took note of Twilight’s sad expression and as much as he’d like to help Rainbow Dash with her wishes, having her go to his universe would be more dangerous than anyone would have anticipated. “Uh well,” he stammered. “I mean, Rainbow Dash, you wouldn’t want to live in my crummy old world.” Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow. “I wouldn’t?” It was Twilight’s turn to take note of Deadpool’s actions. “Pshh, yeah, why do you think I left my world in the first place?” he continued. “Sure you got people like me running around, but the rest of the folks livin’ there are morons! It’s wasn’t fun at all.” “Oh...” Rainbow Dash said sadly. Deadpool couldn’t help but sadden at Rainbow’s expression. Twilight noticed this and silently approached him. “It’s okay,” she whispered. “You did the right thing.” Despite Twilight words, Deadpool still felt a little guilty for crushing Rainbow Dash’s hopes and dreams. He walked towards Rainbow Dash. “Hey, it’s not all bad, right? You must’ve had some fun adventures here.” “Yeah, but they’re too far in between each other for it to mean anything,” said Rainbow Dash. Twilight sighed to herself. There was no getting through to this pony. Deadpool thought to himself for a moment. “Tell you what. Why don’t we go on a little adventure? The two of us!” “What?!” asked both Rainbow Dash and Twilight. “It makes sense! You want to have an exciting adventure, and I just want to hang around here. We call that a ‘win-win’ in my world!” “Heck yeah!” Rainbow Dash yelled out. [What time is it?] {ADVENTURE TIME!} “Now wait a minute, you two!” Twilight shouted. “Let’s not be so hasty...” It was too late, though. Both Rainbow Dash and Deadpool took off like a rocket to go on their non-specified adventure. “Wait!” Twilight shouted again. “We were supposed to...stay...here.” Again, it was too late. “Oh sweet Celestia, this does not bode well,” Twilight finally said to herself. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “This is going to be so cool!” Rainbow Dash said as she flew around excitedly. “What do you think we should do first?” “Sorry, Dashy, I’m not exactly familiar with your world,” Deadpool replied. “What do you usually do for fun in Equestria?” “Dashy?” Rainbow Dash repeated. “Yeah, I said a thing,” Deadpool replied. “Now it’s your turn to answer my question.” “Oh, uh well...” Rainbow Dash stammered. “My friend Pinkie Pie usually plans some fun parties.” “That’s nice...if we were going to a party,” Deadpool snapped his fingers repeatedly. “Adventures, Dashy. Get with the program.” “Well, in my Daring Do books, she would go venture through ruins to find some ancient hidden treasures!” “Good. Then let’s go look for a good ruin.” Rainbow Dash rubbed the back of her head. “Yeah...uh Equestria’s not really the home of many ruins, if you know what I mean.” Deadpool sighed. “Okay, then how about any dangerous creatures we can fight. You got any of those?” “We got dragons,” Rainbow Dash said. “BORING!” Deadpool yelled. “Really?” “Do I look like a knight in shining armor?” “No, you look nothing like Shining Armor.” “I-wha? Nevermind. No dragons.” “How about Timberwolves?” “Bigger.” “Diamond Dogs?” “Lame!” “A Hydra?” “I said no dragons.” “Are Hydras dragons? “I don’t know!” Deadpool shrugged. Rainbow Dash shrugged too. “Well I can’t think of anything else! Equestria’s not really a dangerous sort of place to live in. Why do you think I’m so bored here?” “Great...” Deadpool said sarcastically. “C’mon, there has to be at least one other dangerous creature around. Something really badass; something that no pony would dare to face!” Rainbow Dash pondered for a moment. “I guess if you’re looking for a creature that nopony has ever fought before...I guess that would be an Ursa Major.” “An Ursa-what?” asked Deadpool. “Ursa Major," Rainbow Dash responded. “One time, this pony named Trixie boasted on how she defeated one that was attacking Hoofington. Turned out she was lying and she never even fought an ursa before.” “Hmm, a bear, eh?” Deadpool thought to himself. “Always wanted to wrestle with one of those.” “But even if we were trying to fight an ursa of any kind, they’re not exactly hostile creatures!” Rainbow Dash said. “Pffft. No problemo,” Deadpool said as he started looking towards the sky. “Hey! Author dude! Give us a hand with this, why don’t you?!” Rainbow Dash became confused. “Uh, Deadpool, what are you doing?” [He’s using his situational powers] “Gah!” Rainbow Dash yelled. “Who said that?” {We’re the ghosts of your recently deceased parents! OoOoOoOoOH!} “Don’t mind them,” Deadpool said. “They’re just my subconscious.” “O-Okay...” Rainbow Dash said reluctantly. “Why am I hearing them, exactly?” “I made it so you can hear them. I thought it would be funnier this way.” {And he’s right!} [Hysterical -_-] “And...do they always appear in these white and yellow boxes?” “Oh, we’re actually making note of that?” [Who knows? Maybe specifying our physical appearance will come in handy later.] {I smell foreshadowing!} Rainbow Dash shook her head in even more confusion. “I have no idea what you guys are talking about.” “Neither do we, sometimes!” Deadpool responded. He gestured for Rainbow Dash to follow him. “C’mon, we got a big fat bear we need to fight.” “An Ursa Major,” Rainbow Dash corrected. “Whatever.” ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Twilight?” Twilight sat under the tree where Deadpool used to be as she looked up to see that Princess Celestia had arrived and was addressing her. “Princess Celestia, you’re here!” Twilight immediately stood up and adjusted herself appropriately. The princess nodded her head in response and looked around the area. “I was told by the Royal Guards that a strange creature fell from the portal and that you and Rainbow Dash were keeping it here.” “Uh that’s right,” Twilight stammered a bit. “There was indeed a strange creature that came from the portal...” “And...?” Princess Celestia said as she raised an eyebrow. “Where is this strange creature...and Rainbow Dash for that matter?” “Yes...well, um...funny story actually,” Twilight said nervously. “You know how you always tell me the importance of friendship?” “Mhmm?” Celestia acknowledged. “Well...it just so happens that Rainbow Dash actually befriended the strange creature...and now the two went off to have an adventure together,” Twilight smiled sheepishly. “Ah...I see,” the princess did her best to keep her composure after hearing that. “Well, it’s nice to see that you and your friends are incorporating my teachings...” There was an awkward silence between the two. “Look, Twilight,” Princess Celestia decided to break the silence. “I must be completely honest when I say that we need to find this strange creature and Rainbow Dash as soon as we can.” “Princess?” Twilight didn’t like the sound of Celestia’s tone. “Twilight, this type of scenario has never happened in all of Equestria history,” Princess Celestia said as she looked to the sky at the portal. “I’m worried what the future may hold due to these circumstances.” “But the creature that fell from the portal...he didn’t seem dangerous when we talked to him,” Twilight glanced away for a moment. “A little weird, maybe, but he seemed nice enough.” “I’m not talking about the creature, Twilight,” Celestia said more seriously. “You’re not?” The princess shook her head and then gestured towards the sky. “Look up Twilight. That portal is a gateway to an unknown universe, and it just spat out a creature from said universe.” “I’m afraid I don’t follow, princess,” Twilight said still confused. "It is unnatural for two different universes to combine. I’m afraid if the portal and this strange creature were to remain in Equestria, then it would cause great disharmony for our world.” “D-Disharmony...?” Twilight struggled to repeat. “Indeed, my student,” Princess Celestia looked down and closed her eyes. “If we don’t turn things back to the way it’s supposed to be and soon...I feel that a great disaster is going to affect our world. One of which being...” Twilight managed to figure out where Princess Celestia was going with this. Her eyes widened in horror as she finished the princess’ thought. “Discord.”