//------------------------------//
// Chapter Twenty Eight- The Trouble With Tyllae... 
// Story: STAR TREK: EQUESTRIA 
// by Alicorne 
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CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT



THE TROUBLE WITH TYLLAE…


	Commanders’ Log, copy to Science Officers Log. Commander Starry-Eyes recording. Stardate 1006.3. On course for Sigma Pegasus Star System at Time Warp Factor Five. All ships systems optimal.
It has been six weeks since we left the Equestris Colony. The Chief Engineer informed me today that the final enchantments for the dilithium crystals we took on at Equestris are complete. In the highly unlikely event of a total power systems failure the Hermes will be able to carry on with but the loss of a day to swap out crystals. In all probability we’ll be bringing them back with us so Starfleet can put them in another ship, maybe one of the new Constitution-Class cruisers! I can’t think of a more fitting passing-of-the-torch gesture from one class of Exploration Vessel to the next!
Little Rocks’ concept of recruiting non-Security crewponies to augment his own Department is developing nicely. Virtually every Pony onboard has been touched up on the nuances of handling a phased-balefire pistol beyond Basic Training. The Security Chief and myself have been giving lessons in medium-level Personal Combat Training…with Yours Truly being set up as a sort of Final Exam! Any Pony that can get off a debilitating mock attack or throw passes. …We’ve got some really vicious.. Ponies onboard! I’m still not quite sure how she did it, but Merry managed to put me flat on my back and was poised to cave in my temple on her second try. …And to think I called her off Feldspar! Unorthodox but highly effective! Speaking of unorthodox methods, Yoemare Xantippe practices a Zebrican Martial Art form called ‘Fallen Caesar Style’ that certainly merits attention. That Filly is slipperier than a greased Tellarite! She hasn’t managed to pin or throw me yet, but it’s all I can do just to keep up with the whirlwind of moves she can produce. I hope Bob continues to conduct himself as a gentlestallion, lest the poor buck will ends up tied in a square knot!
Sunny refuses to take up a weapon on moral grounds as does the majority of her Department. Her argument is that if the rest of the crew is fighting all her Ponies will be busy in Sickbay, anyway. Willowbark was the only dissenter, saying that he was willing to fight as a sort of last-ditch defense of the Sickbay so the others could concentrate on tending to the wounded. Well, ‘half an apple’ and all that…
The Crew are coming together nicely, beyond my previous anticipations. The monotony of star-mapping and updating star charts has not dented morale in the least. The encounter with the Klingons seems to have taught one and all the virtues of An Uneventful Cruise!
The Hermes now sports its own band. The Hermes Eclectic Downbeat Combo made its debut last week in the Rec Hall. So far we have guitars, drums, violins, and a keyboard in our repertoire. The  Combo is lending its talents to a collection of budding vocal talents as well as providing background music for any number of would-be re-enactors of what Sunny refers to as ‘sketch comedy’. …Terrestrials spend waaay too much time re-hashing old entertainment vids. I mean, really! “I once shot an elephant in my pajamas… how an elephant got into my pajamas, I have no idea!”? If the Eugenics Wars served any constructive purpose it was to bury things like The Cutie-Marks Brothers safely out of sight of otherwise sane and rational Ponies!
Questionable comedy aside, Mr. Sekkack has been offering interested takers tutoring in chess as well as a fascinating variant  of the game played on a three-level board with rotating mini-sections in the rooks’ corners. Now that’s entertainment! Well it certainly beats the rust off of three-hundred year old cartoons, doesn’t it?
Getting back on-topic, our long range scans of this sector have verified that something beyond a mere charting error has occurred. The stars Pegasus Rho and Pegasus Epsilon A are now confirmed to be eight and eleven light-years out of their respective positions while Pegasus Tau seems to have simply disappeared! In view of the, ah, astronomical odds against these events being scientifically understood natural phenomena we’ve decided to alter our Mission Profile to investigate after we investigate the disappearance of a Civilian Survey Marker left in orbit around an M-Class world in this sector logged by the Cestus Corporation out of Alpha Centauri. The planet in question has been designated by the Corporation as Cestus-Three and is less than a day away at our present speed. 
Cestus Three was surveyed eleven years ago by a ship of the Cestus Corporation. An automated vessel, it used long-range sensors to scan the nearest star systems and put itself in orbit around promising worlds. After transmitting its findings via subspace radio it would leave a Survey Marker behind and move onto the next target. The Survey Vessel was declared lost three years later after it aborted its next mission after recording evidence of a technological civilization on Pegasus Theta-Two. It changed course three light-years out and all telemetry was lost a month after that. The final data from the probe vessel indicated multiple kinetic impacts just prior to all contact being lost. Since it was passing through a loose collection of interstellar asteroidal debris at the time it seems likely that catastrophic collision was the reason for its loss. The vessel only carried limited navigational deflector capacity but it would have only taken one large object to overload the system with disastrous consequences for the rest of the vessel. …But why didn’t the automated navigation systems move to avoid the problem?”
I paused the recording and stifled a yawn, rubbing my eyes. One of the purchases Sunny made on Equestris was an honest-to-Luna mechanical cuckoo clock. The ‘tick-tock’ of the thing wasn’t so bad but, in my own humble opinion, that miserable mechanical cuckoo couldn’t carry a tune in an ore cart! Even after all this time the damn thing still manages to wake me up out of a sound sleep three or four times a night. Sunny just loves the thing, of course, and Tyllae simply lives for the top of every hour so she can flit up and watch it pop out of its little doors and caterwaul. It was getting to the point where I was positively dreading midnight!
I tabbed the recorder again, making a note to drop by the Rec Hall for a cola after watch. I wanted to have my turn at gawking at the voice-actuated Food Replicator prototype Jerry’s Engineers rigged out there anyway.
“Whatever the cause of its loss, the Hermes will do a flyby of Pegasus Theta-Two in order to gather more data on the state of the civilization there. En route we will scan for the vessel and try to salvage it… if we can find it!
As a final note, two and a half weeks ago Starfleet requested that we do a thorough physical on ‘The life-form named Tyllae’ and forward the results to Starfleet Medical as well as Starfleet Arcane Sciences Division. They also wanted a recording of Tyllae recounting in her own words about the events that led her to be on the Cimarron. The implied request included a recap of her encounter with Nightmare Moon as well as any details of her experiences with the Goddesses Themselves. Since Tyllae relives rather than recounts memories she was more than a little shattered by the ordeal… though the memories of Luna and Celestia seemed to go a long way toward countering the effects of her account of Nightmare Moon. At my suggestion she also gave her account of history as Faeries know it as well as Tyllae’s insistence that she feels she is somehow instrumental in our locating the Goddesses… I hope that was a good idea.
We’ve heard nothing since and the silence is making me feel uneasy. Starfleet Bureaucracy should have moved faster than this! I’ve asked our Communications Officer to keep me informed of any reply. A couple hours ago Captain Caper received a private communiqué from Starfleet Command that he took in his quarters. He hasn’t returned yet, though he did request that Mr. Sekkack and Sunny come to his quarters. Neither Tyllae or myself were included in that request. I am… understandably curious about what is going on.  Commander Starry-Eyes, out.
I eyed the chronometer and drummed my fingers on my knee impatiently. It was the end of the watch and I really wanted to be up and doing.. something, anything! I was in the process of turning to look at Merry. She’d already anticipated me, though.
“No word from the Skipper yet, Boss-Lady! ‘Ere! Whatcha think’s going on, eh?”
“I can’t say.” I said, really wanting that cola just then! “It must be something important, though.” I sat back again and rubbed my eyes, tired and trying to feel optimistic.
“Do you really think they’ll recall the Ship?” Evee turned to look back at me. “Because of Tyllae, I mean!” The rumor mill had been running nonstop since the little tyke came aboard.
“Be a shame to have us turn back now we’ve just gotten started.” Guiding Star quietly said to Main Screen.
“They can’t!” Jerry put in. “Years of planning went into this mission! I mean, Tyllae’s important but she can’t be that important… can she?”
“Got a lot of Ponies back ‘ome runnin’ scared, Oy’ll bet she does, eh, eh?”
“Scared of what? One Faery?” Jerry scoffed.
“Think on it, Mate!” Merry rounded on the Chief Engineer. “What ‘appens to Earth government when Their Nibs get back, eh? Ol’ President Buttercup’s out of a job, ditto fer the United Paddocks! Roight proper shake-up of the ‘ole bloody chain of command from top ta bottom, that’s what it’d be! Lotsa politicos stand to be out on their bloody ears and Oy’d bet me last credit they ain’t gonna go without they kick up a ruckus! ‘Ere…!” She motioned us all in to listen closer… though how she thought she’d have a conspiratorial conversation across the entire Bridge is quite beyond me!
“Oy ‘appen to know ol Round-Ears sent hisself off a report to the bloody Vulcan Science Academy about ol’ Tilly! Ol’ Fuzz-Face (Merry never did warm up to Bogan!) did the same to the mucky-mucks of Tellar!”
I was shocked! “Merry!”
“Don’t get yer knickers in a twist, Starry! Oy didn’t read ‘em! But the subject and destination’s all public record. Gimme credit fer a little bit ‘o brains!”
“All right, a little bit of brains then. I’m sure the Captain would agree!” I was trying to keep it light… but I couldn’t help but to wonder just how many Ponies in Starfleet Command were thrashing out these same ramifications.
Merry laughed. “Well Oy’ll be the first to admit Oy ain’t the sharpest knoyfe in the drawer but even Oy can see Ol’ Caper’s in a bit of a bunch! Ya gotta admit there’s some in Starfleet what ain’t ‘appy ‘bout them reports goin’ out roight from under their noses, eh, eh? Betcha ‘e’s being raked over the old coals fer just that!”
“I can see why he’d want to see Mr. Sekkack,” Jerry mused. “But why Doctor Cross?”
“Yeah!” I tried not to sound too put out! “What am I, a bucket of gravel?”
“Aww! ‘E prolly just needed sumpin’ fer ‘is stomach is all! Ya know ‘ow them ‘igh an’ moighty officer types are, eh, Starry?”
I was saved the trouble of coming up with a suitable reply by the turbolift doors opening to deposit the first wave of our replacements for the oncoming watch. I exchanged greetings with Melody while Merry’s replacement waited by Merry’s station. A pale-brown and sandy-blonde  Earth Pony Stallion in Services Red stepped up to me after doing a quick survey of the Bridge. He was one of our new Ponies, a Lieutenant we’d picked up on Earth. I searched my memory for his name but I couldn’t find it. My eyes dropped to the cutie-patch in the shape of a small, steepled building on his tunic as came up…
“Good afternoon, Lt. …Church, is it?”
“Kyrk, Ma’am. Gorge Kyrk, from Security. I’m on Bridge Rotation today. I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting you till now.” He gave me a polite, affable smile as he offered his hoof. For a terrestrial Pony he was fairly tall, just a few inches shorter than Sunny without her horn, but more robustly built. Not overly-muscled, but capable looking. He wore his mane military-short and military-straight… except for one stray lock that managed to fall across his forehead! His grip was firm even though overwhelmed by my bigger hoof.
“I’m Starry-Eyes, Lieutenant Kyrk. Sorry about mangling your name. There aren’t that many of us on Equestris yet to have to worry about cognomens! So your family follows the old practice of assuming the wife’s family name then?”
“That’s right, Commander. My wife’s people come from the north of Bittain.” I noticed his eyes were green.
“No kidding! My ancestors came from the same place. Sunny and I exchanged last names, but it doesn’t seem to make much difference to anypony. So, is your mother an Earth Pony? Maybe we share cousins or something.” I winked, liking this Pony already.
Kyrk laughed quietly. “I don’t think any of them made it to Equestris. Mom’s folks are Pegasai!”
“So much for that then! At least she isn’t an Alicorn. What a bunch!” I stood and stretched just a little bit. “You have the Conn, Lieutenant.  We’re steady on course for Pegasus Sigma. Sensors are still scanning for further developments from Pegasus Rho and Epsilon-A. There’s no Communications traffic since late this morning and Engineering reports a-ok. The Ship’s all yours!”
“I relieve you then, Commander.”
“I feel better already, Lieutenant! Have a good day!” I hustled out just in time to squeeze into the lift with Merry and Evee.
“Where ya headed, Boss-Lady?” Merry had her hoof on the controls.
“Rec Hall. I need a drink of caffeine and then I’ll go home and try to get a nap… if I can.” I yawned.
“Cuck-oo! Cuck-oo!” Evee chirped while Merry guffawed!
“Don’t you start!” I tried to look indignant while bumping my head against the roof of the lift. “I wish the damn thing had a mute button! I’d do a laryngectomy on it if I thought I could get away with it!”
“Aww ya get used to it sooner or later!” Merry said breezily. “Oy remember when Oy was a little sprog! We ‘ad an ‘ouse in the old part of town roight smack over the top of one of ‘em maglev subways. You get to the point where you never ‘ear the noise after a bit! Some Ponies’re just hoigh-strung, I guess!” I gave her a dark look.
“Let me get you one out of the kindness of my heart since your sooo understanding!” I grumped.
“Thanks anyway, Boss, but Oy’m not much a hoof at fiddlin’ round with woinding things up much!”
“Except the Captain!” Evee giggled.
“’E don’t moind none! Oy’m just keepin’ ‘im on ‘is toes, is all.  Ol’ Skipper’s a roight good sport… just don’t tell ‘em Oy said that! Never bloody’d  believe it if ya did!”
“You sure there’s nothing going on between you two?” Evee gave the Comm Officer a nudge.
“Damn, the secret’s out!” Merry declared and tipped me a wink. “Truth is we been carryin’ on now on the sly for years!”
Evee blinked, surprised, while I just rolled my eyes.
“Yep! Oy’ve ‘ad four of the Old Goats luv kids back ‘ome in Adleneigh! Been a roight good sport ‘bout the child support, too! All of ‘em’s gonna grow up to be Admirals so Oy’m gonna be sittin’ roight purty in my old age!”
Evee’s ears drooped flat and she facehoofed while Merry chortled! The lift doors opened.
“…And I’m outa here!” I declared.
The Rec Room always has a crowd in it and is one of the physically largest places on the ship, coming in fourth behind Engineering, the Hangar, and the Gym. On the time-honored tradition that more is better, there are billiard tables, dart boards, a couple of ping-pong tables, and not a few electronic games arranged among several gaming tables with a small bar (With a two-drink-per-Watch-Per-Pony limit!) and snack stand tucked into the corner. In the opposite corner was the raised platform where music and performances were done. Factor in all the chairs and there was just about enough room to navigate. Put more than five Ponies in the room and things begin to get positively congested!
Tyllae was with a group of Ponies at the bandstand/stage where a rehearsal was going on for an upcoming production of some more of those Luna-awful Cutie-Marks Brothers skits. A few of the musicians were getting together with some of our budding actors striking up… time and again… variations on,
	“The Captain is a very moral Pony!
Hooray for Captain Gelding!
The Zebrican Explorer!”
A Crewpony from Engineering was wearing a pith helmet and sporting a ridiculous fake black mustache and matching beetling black eyebrows. He plucked a huge, fake cigar out of his mouth to chime in…
“Did somepony call me a schnorer?”
… to the evident amusement of one and all!
I flattened my ears and sighed. Sometimes I think all these Ponies are crazy!
Tyllae zipped over and huggled my neck before I saw her coming!
“Hi-hii, Starry! Tyllae was watching ‘Animal Crackers’!”
“I know! I know! Sunny has all those shows, remember? We’ve seen them all a zillion times!”
“Issa more fun with Tyllae’s friends doin’ it, Starry! Cappy Gelding is funny! Watch, watch, watch!” The little tyke tried to lead me by tugging at my unmoving hoof while Pith Helmet quipped,
“If I stay here, I’ll go nuts!”
… Which pretty much summed up my position!
“I just came in to get something to drink before going home for a while, kiddo! Why don’t you join me?”
Snacks and goodies get the little flits attention every time!
“Ooh! Talky-machine givin’ out food, Starry! Tyllae watched Jerry-Ponies put in today! Can Tyllae try? Please, please, please?” She flitted in front of my face and gave me the biggest little black eyes she could!
“You want to get food from a machine?” I quirked a Vulcan eyebrow at the little Fey.
“Yep, yep, yep!” She noddled hard enough to jangle her antennae. “Looky like fun! Come on, Starry! Right over here!”
Well it was a good twenty feet farther away from the stage…
“Ok, kiddo! Let’s give it a try.” 
“Yaayyy!” Tyllae did a couple loop-the-loops and came in for a landing square on top of my head, making the Mare in my head cock her head toward the sounds coming from her ceiling!
We got in line behind two other Ponies and watched the process. There were data solids for drinks or snacks or even hot meals. Each solid, I was given to understand by Jerry, contained templates for hundreds of selections in each category. One slipped in the proper solid, activated the interface, voiced a selection then the machine, using replicator-based technology, would synthesize your request to be retrieved from the compartment in the front. It was an inefficient process given the amount of energy involved and just wouldn’t do to feed large numbers of Ponies. The synthetics that would be our standby food when the real stuff ran out were made by the same process. In that case the efficiency was tweaked higher… at the cost of aesthetic appeal. This device, though, was made to produce a more palatable product at the cost of  horrible energy usage. It would only be a matter of time before Starfleet ironed out the bugs in the system. In the meantime a unit like this, intended for purely recreational purposes by a relatively small number of Ponies, was justified in the name of morale. Hermes was a test-bed for all sorts of cutting edge technology!
When our turn came I chose the blue solid for drinks, tabbed the size selector for thirty-two ounces, and toggled the button that activated the interface.
“Wor-king.” The synthetic, female voice stated. Tyllae looked on with interest.
“Sugar free Sparkle-Cola Rad. No ice.” I said then watched as a series of lights indicating successful identification of request, verification of operational status, and replication in process in that order played across the display. A soft series of musical beeps indicated the process was finished and the door over the retrieval bin opened to reveal an insulated tumbler of Starfleet blue. I picked it up an took a sip. It was a little sweet and maybe a trifle flat but not a bad attempt. I shrugged and took another drink as the machine intoned.
“Com-plete.”
“Tyllae’s turn!” The little tyke exclaimed then flitted down to the data solid. “Tyllae wanna drink, too, so little blue brick stay there, right Starry?”
“That’s right, Squirt. Now press that button for an eight-ounce cup.” Tyllae zipped over to stomp both forehooves on the thing decisively.
“Now hit the white button to activate it and there you go!” I took another sip, thinking the stuff could have been just a little bit colder…
Tyllae rapped the white button smartly and hovered over the speaker/pickup expectantly.
“Wor-king.”
“Hiii-hi!” She waved to the machine. “Tyllae wants to get something nice to drink, please!”
The machine gave a two-toned error warble, then. “Un-able to process request. Please re-state.”
Tyllae frowned at the thing. “Tyllae said Tyllae wanna get a drink!’
“Un-able to process request. Please re-state.”
“Stoopid machine! Tyllae wanna get a drink!”
“Un-able to pro- “
“Hay!”
“In-cor-rect data module in place. Please select cor-rect module and try again.”
Tyllae spun in mid-air and dealt the thing a buck with both back hooves capable of tipping over a beetle or pulverizing an anemic mosquito that made no impression on the plastic housing! I came to the little Fey’s rescue.
“Order cancel.” The machine whirred and beeped and shut down. I turned to the seething Faery.
“Tyllae. The machine didn’t understand your request. It’s not very bright…”
“Issa stoopid machine!” She snarked.
“Just start over and tell it what you want right after it says ‘working’. Use as few words as possible. It’s not as smart as a Faery.” I said gently, suppressing a grin for her sake.
“Starry can say that again!” The little Luddite shook herself and went through the process once more…
“Wor-king.”
“Hot choccies!” Tyllae hovered over the speaker looking as menacing as anything so cute could!
“Un-able to process re-quest. Please re-state.”
“Grr-r-r-r-r-r!”
“Tyllae!” I whispered. “It doesn’t know what ‘choccies’ are! You want chocolate, tell it that!”
The little Fey, wings fluttering at relativistic speeds, glared at the thing and drew a breath to enunciate carefully. “Choc-oh-let. Hot!” She looked to me in approval and I nodded, giving her a thumbs-up.
The lights played, the tones sounded and the door opened to reveal… a half-melted bar of chocolate in a cup! Oops.
“Com-plete.”
Tyllae began prancing up and down on the literal-minded replicator!
“Stoopid, stoopid, stoopid machiney! Tyllae gonna hex it! Give Tyllae hot choccies!”
“Maybe you should let me do it for you…”
“No, no, no! Tyllae is waaay smarter than stoopid ol’ machiney! Tyllae fixit!” She flitted down to ponyhandle the cup of melted chocolate bar into the nearby recycler, thumping the button with her rump, before flitting back to the replicator quivering in elfin wrath!
“Lissen to Tyllae, stoopid!” She waved an angry hoof. “Or Tyllae gonna hafta get real, real, real mean!” She jabbed the size selection savagely then jumped with all four hooves on the activation stud!
“Wor-king.”
Tyllae raised a hoof to me to forestall any comment before barking into the pickup.
“Hot choccies!”
“Un-able to res-“
Tyllae really had been paying attention when Jerry’s Ponies had put the thing in and were testing it out. She screwed up her face, remembering exactly what they said!
“Over-ride!” She stated. “Ex-trap-o-late!” Interesting! She’d just instructed the machine to use its cybernetic judgment in fulfilling her request. I wasn’t the only interested onlooker. A couple of ponies… including Pith Helmet… had queued up behind us and were leaning around me to see what would happen.
Tyllae looked absurdly smug as the thing beeped and whirred to itself meditatively before launching into the replication process. The completion tones sounded and the door slip up once again to display… half a dozen gleaming cylindrical sticks of chalk upright in a Starfleet-blue mug! I didn’t have to be touching them to know they were hot…
Tyllae whimpered and pointed an accusing hoof at the results!
Pith Helmet chose that moment to waggle both his cigar and his Luna-awful eyebrows! “That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen!”
Defeated, Tyllae slunk into my mane and hid. She stayed there as I dumped the chalk into the recycler and ordered a ‘hot cocoa’. I switched modules and called up a pair of nice, fluffy marshmallows to go with it. The marshmallows did the trick to entice the sulky Fey back into the open!
“Issa stoopid machine!” She grumped as she dunked a marshmallow into her drink. “Tyllae gonna tell Jerry-Jer onna rep-lee-cay-ter an maybe Jerry-Jer let Tyllae hex it good!”
“Don’t be too hard on it, kiddo!” I soothed. “It was doing its best to do what you wanted. It just didn’t understand you is all! If you want to hex something, try hexing that miserable cuckoo clock!”
“Whyfor, Starry? Issa nice, nice, nice clock!”
“It’s keeping me awake at night! Every hour on the hour, ‘cuckoo-cuckoo’! It’s enough to drive a Pony to drink!”
“Issa why Starry drinking fizzy-stuff? But Tyllae thought Starry didn’t have to sleep as long as Sunny does!” She flitted up to peer into my tumbler.
“I just felt like a cola. It’s a figure of speech meaning that it’s driving me batty to the point of turning to alcohol. Besides, I need four or five hours of solid sleep to get by, not four or five catnaps! Sheesh!”
“Awww! Poor Starry! Tyllae can fix!”
“Don’t mess with that clock! I was only kidding, kiddo! Sunny just loves the damn thing.”
“Trust Tyllae! Tyllae can fix! Tyllae can make a little spell so Starry’s side of the bed all nice an quiet alla time! Yep, yep, yep!”
I’ll admit, I was tempted by the idea! “Well… no, that wouldn’t work. I’d need to be able to hear the intercom or, Luna forbid, a Red Alert! Thanks for the offer, though.” I passed her the remaining marshmallow.
But Tyllae had gotten ahold of the idea and wouldn’t let it go. Ignoring the sweet treat she zipped up for a landing on the end of my nose! As an attention-getter the act was a rousing success but I felt ridiculous looking cross-eyed down the end of my muzzle at the excitable Fey. Nearby crewponies turned and smiled in our direction.
“Will you get off my nose and sit on the table and talk like a civilized Pony already?” I shooed her off and she landed, prancing in place!
“Tyllae gotta real, real, real good idea, Starry! Tyllae issa geen-ee-us, yep, yep, yep!” She would have patted herself on the back if she could reach that far!
“All right, all right! What’s the idea, Little Miss Genius?”
“Remember spell Tyllae used so Starry an Sunny would not notice little Tyllae-stachoo? Tyllae can use same spell only with cooky-clock! Jussa little, little, little spell an Tyllae knows it already works jussa fine! Tyllae can do! Let Tyllae help! Please, please, pleeeeze, Starry?” Her eyes, while lacking Sunny’s mystic megawattage, were just do darn eager!
“Well….” I rubbed between my eyes and staved off another yawn as I mulled it over. She did have a point, the spell the little tyke employed earlier seemed to edit her right out of everypony’s mind while she used it. And there didn’t seem to be any adverse effects afterwards… and I was tired! The Mare in my head, Equestrin to the core, was dubious as I nodded to the little Fey.
“Okay. …Okay! What can it hurt? Go ahead, Squirt! Er… what do you want me to do?”
“Jussa sit still an let smart, smart, smart Tyllae do alla work! Won’t take a couple of tickey-tocks, nope, nope, nope! Wheeeee!”
The little flit zoomed in an ascending spiral around me ending up poised just off the end of my nose. She paused dramatically with quivering wings spread wide and one little forehoof raised while the little pips on the end of her antennae glowed bright pink, a touchingly solemn expression on her elfin face.
Down came the teeny hoof to bop me lightly on the end of the nose…
“There! All done! Starry is now enchanted, yep, yep, yep!”
I didn’t realize I’d been holding my breath. I let it out while the Mare in my head scanned her readouts anxiously. I blinked. “That’s it?”
“Yep, yep, yep! All done! Tyllae very, very, very good at Magic!” The little Fey beamed proudly.
“Oh.” I cautiously checked to see if I felt… different and was pleased to notice nothing! “I was expecting a flash of light or some… I don’t know… pixie dust or maybe a rhyme or something.” I shrugged apologetically to Tyllae who was looking suddenly indignant!
“Pixy?” She shrilled. “Tyllae is no silly, little scattery-brain Pixy! Tyllae thought Starry wanted real magic an not just silly lights! Hmph!” She crossed her forelegs and looked away.
“Hay!” I tried to mollify. “Don’t be that way! What do I know for Magic? I just thought there was more to it than that!”
“Tyllae makes a perfeckly good, good, good spell to help Starry an Starry says ‘Pixy’ to Tyllae who jus wanna be good an help! Phooey! Lika stoopid, giggling Pixy could do Magic like clever Tyllae!” The little Fey grumped. “An Starry didn even say ‘Thank You’ to poor, hardworking Tyllae! Tyllae make it so clocks never bother Starry again an Tyllae gets called Pixy ‘cause Tyllae did not use dumbo machienies with stoopid lights an noises! Feh! Tyllae gonna go where someponies ‘preciate nice, nice, nice Tyllae!” With that, she flicked her little tail at me and disappeared with an audible ‘pif’!
“Tyllae!” …But it was too late. I sighed and rubbed the bridge of my nose again. Sometimes Tyllae can be so… flighty! I took comfort in the fact that she’d forget the whole thing in an hour or two, Faeries… Pixie comments aside… just don’t hold grudges!
I popped the marshmallow into my mouth and washed it down with the rest of the cola as the Rec Hall doors whooshed open to admit a brown-and-blonde mare wearing a shabby overcoat and a grubby top hat, carrying an ‘oogah’ horn under her arm. She was closely followed by a black-and-green stallion decked out in a brown jacket that was one size too small for him with big patches on the elbows. A floppy, shapeless brown hat with a tiny feather in it was jammed down upon his head and the both of them were grinning like whatever-the Hell a-Loon-is does!
The Cutie-Marks Brothers were evidently about to ride again so I decided to pull out and try for that nap. Reflexively, I looked up and the chronometer over the doorway… and was surprised to see it wasn’t there! I blinked. Well Jerry’s Engineers were in here today connecting up the Food Replicator and everypony knows how Engineers just love to change things! I always thought it would have made more sense to put the thing on the back wall, anyway… I twisted around to look at the back of the room. No chronometer! I checked the remaining walls with the same result. Huh!
Finally I went up to the snack bar where Ensign Scoop was on duty. “Hey, Scoop!”
“What’ll it be, Commander? That phony cola leave a bad taste in your mouth?”
“No, no. I was just wondering where they moved the chronometer. I can’t find it anywhere!”
“Say what now?” He looked at me like I’d grown Tellarite fur!
“The chronometer.” I explained. “Where did they move it to?”
“Uh…” He pointed with a hoof at the doorway. “It’s right over there where it always is.”
I looked back in surprise. How could I have missed it? …But nothing but a blank wall greeted my gaze! Oh, no! My ears drooped and the Mare in my head played Tyllae’s words back to me. … ‘Tyllae makes it so clocks don’t bother Starry again…’
“You ok, Commander?”
The oogah-horn honked and the blonde Pony was capering around the stage with Pith Helmet and Brown Hat in attendance. I was suddenly very tired, indeed!
“I’m fine, Scoop. Just been a long day!”
Just then the intercom sounded its two-toned whistle. “Commander Starry-Eyes please report to the Captains Quarters. Repeat, Commander Starry-Eyes please report to the Captains Quarters.” 
…And the day just kept getting longer!